Hello everyone,

sorry for the wait, but it was two weeks at the beach and the day we came back it was 5:50 with no proper sleep for 23 hours previous so it took until today that I managed to update.

It was a nice Holiday but way to much waiting included for my liking. Traffic jams, receptions and extremly unpunctual ferries.

But I have to stop ranting so:

Disclaimer: DGM and No.6 belong to their rightful owners not me (can't find a more creative way to write it at the moment)

And here's the eleventh chapter of 'A song to change worlds':


Shion's POV

I stand next to Nezumi, rubbing his back soothingly, as he throws up over the railing of the ship. It's been nearly two days since we left the harbour city. It seems my friend is not good at handling the ship's rocking. There is no sea in No.6 so none of us did know that. He started feeling ill about an hour after we left the harbour. I was a bit worried when he threw up the first time, but Nezumi said he would be fine. Some of the crew assured me it's nothing to worry about, only seasickness, but of course I can't help but be concerned. After he emptied his stomach for the first time Allen gave him some sleeping medicine on the evening of the first day on sea. Nezumi slept pretty much a whole day because of that, he woke up late afternoon yesterday. It would have been better if he didn't. I tried to make him eat something in the evening but it went straight into the water. Sheesh, who would have imagined you could see him so weak just because of some waves.

Right now the waves have become a bit higher than the days before, there is stronger wind now. So he wasn't even able to take the pills Allen gave him to sleep, just threw them up as well. I must admit I feel a bit sick myself and seeing Nezumi vomiting doesn't actually help. I am doing my best to take care of him, even sleeping in the same room again, what earns me weird looks from the crew. But I am not the only one. Allen has also been eating less than normal. And the reason can't be that he doesn't have anything to do. There were some little akuma attacks the passing days. No danger luckily, the exorcists handled it. Solely Kanda seems not to be affected at all by the sea. He is spending his days sitting around (Allen says, he is meditating) or swinging his sword in the back of the ship. And I think he is trying to somehow avoid Allen. The other doesn't care about that though and instead spends a lot of time just watching the long-haired man. I have been observing that for some time now and made my own thoughts about it. I wanted to ask Allen (asking Kanda is not such a good idea; even I have learned that much) but with all that problems with Nezumi and his seasickness I didn't find the time.

I am ripped out of my thoughts as I hear Nezumi making his final gag, not having anything to throw up inside of him anymore. He groans and leans back. I put my arms around him and help him sit down on the ground leaning against the railing. He slumps down and closes his eyes. I leave a hand on his shoulder and kneel next to him.

"You okay?" Alright, not the best thing to say, since he is obviously not okay.

He somehow nods exhausted. "It will work out… How long are we still going to stay on this fucking ship?"

I chuckle a bit. "Well, at least 7 more days."

He groans at that, which causes me to chuckle again.

"But you could be far worse off." I explain to him further, "I have talked to some of the crew. The wind stands good for us. We are lucky. They say this journey normally takes over two weeks."

He looks horrified at that, then he closes his eyes again. I look at him for a moment of silence. He is still beautiful even when he is as bad as he is now. I smile a bit sadly but with his eyelids shut he can't see that. So I speak again, my voice sounding sadder than before but I can't help it although the comment is meant to cheer him up a bit.

"That means I will have less time to look after you than I hoped for."

He opens his eyes and looks at me. I can't make out what he is feeling or thinking right now. He is good at hiding his emotions. Then he smiles lightly and my heart starts to beat faster.

"Hm… I don't mind at all being taken care by you. I just don't need this fucking seasickness." Then he looks to the side as if he is embarrassed and his next words I nearly can't hear because his voice is so low and the sounds of the ship and the water overpowering it. "Without it I would love to let you take care of me for longer. I would love to spend more time with you."

When I hear this my heart skips a beat. I inhale sharply. My heartbeat has fastened again and I feel his warmth against me. I didn't realize I got closer also to hear what he is saying. My head is spinning. What does he mean by that? Does he mean, he likes me too? I don't know. He is watching me intensely as if expecting some kind of answer. Should I tell him how I feel? My true feelings? But what would he say? He would laugh, wouldn't he? He would say emotions like love are stupid or something like that. I look into his eyes and have the impression they sadden somehow. At that I come to a decision. It's now or I will never find such a moment again! So I gather all the courage I have in me, breathe in deep and open my mouth to speak.

"Nezumi…" He looks directly at me and my courage wavers. No backing out now! "I… It's… I wanted to tell you for some time… I… " Why the hell is that so difficult?

"I wanted… I-I really l-like you!"

It's finally out! But when I look in his eyes I see sadness. Now I am confused. What did I say wrong? He averts his gaze and his facial expression changes into a blank one.

"I see", he mumbles, starting to get up, "If it's like that, I guess my thoughts went overhead…"

It takes me a moment to understand what he means. It appears as if he didn't take it as a confession but simply as liking someone like a friend. So I turn immediately and grip his wrist.

"Wait Nezumi!" He turns around surprised. "You misunderstood!"

"W-What?" I hear his confusion. Yes, I remember now, that he isn't good at expressing or reading emotions either. So I have to make it clear.

"I-I said 'like', yes, but… I don't mean in it like… " I am struggling for words, "like in liking a friend. It's more l-like… like I-I l-love you… "

Okay, that's not how I exactly wanted it to come out. I see his shocked expression. Oh god, he is going to hate me now, isn't he? I look down in embarrassment, releasing his wrist in the process. I close my eyes afraid of what comes next. Suddenly I feel warm arms wrapping around me and someone holding me close. I don't dare to look up, afraid of it being Allen or someone else or a dream (I have dreamed something like that quite often). But then I recognize the smell as I take a breath, it is Nezumi's. He is hugging me. Then I hear his soft voice.

"You stupid airhead," his voice is slightly shaking and I hold my breath. "Why didn't you tell me earlier?"

I look up at him, tears starting to form in my eyes. "W-What? What do you mean? I thought you didn't care about me? Not more than some debt to repay!"

He smiles at me, a genuine smile. Then he lifts his left hand to caress my cheek.

"I have long changed my opinion. I started to think about you as someone important to me. But recently I realized that my feelings go even deeper…"

He trails off, apparently at the lack of words. My eyes have widened while he spoke. I can't believe what I am hearing. Does he mean…? Does that mean he returns my feelings? Please let this not be a dream! And I am confirmed by his next words.

"I… I don't really know how to say this but I-I think… I love you too, Shion." He looks at me nervously, but I am too (positively) shocked to answer right at the moment. "If-If you want to accept me… I… I would…"

But he is cut off as I snap out of my daze and fling my arms around his neck. I burry my face in his shoulder, not realizing that I started to cry.

"Thank you! Thank you so much, Nezumi! I-I really love you as well…"

"O-Oi Shion!" He is quite surprised by my attack, but I can hear the happiness in his voice. "You okay?"

"Yes, I am! I am so happy!" I smile up at him, tears still on my cheeks. He smiles back at me, brighter than I have ever seen it. His hands are now resting on my cheeks and he is whipping away the tears. He leans his forehead against mine.

"Don't cry! There is no reason! We will stay together now, okay?" I nod eagerly, looking him in the eyes. He smirks as he speaks again. "But I think we will skip the kiss for now… We will do it when I am not throwing up all the time and my mouth tastes of something else than vomit…"

I turn red at those words and his smirk grows wider. He strokes my face for another time.

"If it's okay for you, I would like to go back to my cabin now. I need to rest before the next time of emptying myself in the sea."

I chuckle and smile at him, although my cheeks are still wet. I nod, unable to speak at the moment. He then stands up still smiling and a bit red himself. He gives me one last smile before he returns to his room.

I lay back at the railing, a bit dazed from what just happened. I regain my breath and a bright smile spreads across my face. I am unable to hold it in. I sit like that for some time until I hear someone chuckling from my right. As I turn my head I see Allen who is looking at me amused, but with a hint of sadness in his eyes.

"It seems like you finally got your boyfriend. I am happy for you." He sits next to me, smiling. "See, I told you he likes you."

My grin grows wider. "Yes, thank you. I am really happy."

He smiles at me but as I observe him I notice his smile appears slightly fake. I don't really want to touch a sensitive subject, but I want him to find the happiness I am feeling right now as well.

"You-You are thinking of him, aren't you?" I motion to the back of the ship, where I saw Kanda the last time, training. "Of Kanda"

He turns his head down and seems to be wavering for a moment, then he nods looking a bit solemnly.

"Yeah… Maybe you were right… That I l-like him, I mean."

I smile, not being able to wipe the grin off of my face. I hope he is able to get through to Kanda as well, he seems even more stubborn than Nezumi.

"But different from you, Kanda would never return my feelings…" He draws his knees up to his chest, hugging them. But then his expression changes again, he gets back to his normal happy-polite self. "But that's okay for me. I am happy if I can be by his side in battle and he accepts me as a companion. And as long as he doesn't die…"

I don't really know what to say. I already told him my opinion on the train and it won't help to repeat that to him now. So I keep silent watching him (still the grin on my face). After some moments of silence he stands up, smiling at me.

"I think I will get something to eat now. I am pretty hungry. Since you all ate earlier I will go alone." He grins and walks away, into the ship, but not before casting a glance to his exorcist companion as I know and leaves me alone again.


Allen's POV

I am sincerely happy for Shion. Even though I know maybe my facial expression didn't look like it, but I am. I have been watching basically the whole event, starting from the moment Nezumi stopped vomiting. Nonetheless I can't help but feel a bit of sadness as well. They both looked so happy. They found their luck. I wish I could do the same. But Kanda would never return my feelings. I doubt he is even able to feel something like that for anyone. And if, for sure not for me (Linali maybe). He despises me and he makes that very clear. So I guess no happy ending for exorcists, is it?

I chuckle at this thought. It's really sarcastic. I tried to cast feelings like these away because they get too much in the way in our job. And now I fell in love with someone who did this with so much success until he is nearly void of them. And another man on top of that. Even in the unlikely case that he would accept me, we could never live in a relationship. It is not allowed in the time we live in. The church says it is a sin to love someone of the same gender. But I can't help that I do. So am I gay? No, I am not. I can answer at least that. I am not simply gay, I have never liked any other man (for sure not Lavi, thank you very much; he is a great friend but simply no!). I thought Linali was cute and I still do (do not let Komui hear this). I think I only love Kanda and it has nothing to do with sexual orientation. Gah, all this philosophy over that will not help anything.

And at that I notice my stomach grumbling. I haven't eaten much earlier because I felt a bit sick thanks to the waves. So I am really hungry now. I walk to the door leading down into the ship. Before I enter I stop for a second glancing at the back of the ship. There I see the silhouette of Kanda. He is training as he always does. Unfortunately as I watch him my thoughts start to drift again, back to the scene I witnessed between Shion and Nezumi. I force myself to tear my eyes away and walk inside.

After a good meal I get back out still having some remains in my hands. When I turn I see Kanda is still swinging his sword. I stop, watching him, and keep on munching my food. I can't help but blush a bit. He looks really good like that. His long hair swinging in the wind on the sea, his eyes burning with determination, with his coat put away and only his top on and slightly sweaty due to his training.

I am so captured that I don't notice when he puts his sword back in the sheath, grabs his coat and looks over to me. It is his voice that rips me out of it as he starts walking towards me.

"Oi, beansprout! What are you staring at?"

I shoot up trying to look away. "I… ah… nothing…"

He raises one eyebrow coming to a halt in front of me. "Something wrong with you, moyashi? You are red in the face…"

I shake my head. Hurry! Think of something! Now! Then I remember that I still have some onigiri from my meal in the hands. "I, well… I thought you might want something to eat after your training." I say as I hold the rice balls out to him.

He looks suspicious for a moment, first at me then at the food. Geez, does he think I poisoned it or something? But after that he takes two of them nonetheless. He nods at me what could be considered a thanks. Then he goes over to the railing watching the sea again. I waver a second over what to do and decide to join him in the end. I step next to him but he apparently doesn't really notice me. I follow his gaze but after some silence I speak up.

"Kanda, I… I know it may be stupid, but I wanted to ask you something…"

From somewhere I have gathered enough courage, probably from the example I saw from Nezumi and Shion earlier.

"What, moyashi?" His voice sounds less hostile than I feared.

"I… Ah… What do you think of feelings?"

"Huh?" he turns around a look of irritation on his face, "What do you mean by that? Feelings? Specify, bloody hell, moyashi!"

"I mean feelings like… sadness, trust, friendship… or love? And it's still Allen." I mumble the answer, unsure of his reaction.

"Hmpf," he scoffs but then returns his gaze into the distance appearing deep in thought. "I think they are stupid…"

I lower my gaze sadly. I knew he would say something like that. But then he continues.

"They get in the way on the battlefield. You can get distracted by them. If you let them get to you, in the end you will only get hurt." He looks at the ground himself, looking as sad as I have rarely seen someone. "If you get to know someone… If you start to feel something like that for people, if you start to… love someone, you will only experience loss and sadness in the end. You will only be hurt by these kind of feelings."

I watch him, slightly shocked. He has such a sad expression on his face. His fist clenches around the onigiri smashing it in the process. His whole body is tense. I supress the urge to hug him to give him comfort, because I bet he wouldn't appreciate that. It seems as if he experienced a great loss in his past. His mysterious past. There we are again. I would love to ask more but I don't want to stir some bad memories up. Now I also kinda understand why he is so cold. He is trying to protect himself from further harm. He negates emotions, doesn't let anyone get close with his unfriendly attitude so that he wouldn't get hurt again.

I just stand there, not knowing what to do. It results in me lying a hand on his shoulder. He doesn't look up, just keeps staring in the distance.

"You are just like him…" I hear him say in a sad and silent voice I have never heard from him before (it sounds a bit like he isn't here with his thoughts but somewhere far away; like in a trance). "That's why you irritate me so much. You are so similar to him… on the outside… The same naivetés, the same polite and happy to everyone attitude and self-sacrificing… Even though yours is more fake… "

Just like him? Him? Who the hell is he talking about? For sure not Lavi. I don't know anybody in the Order who would fit. Then who does he mean? Judging from his behaviour I would say it was someone once important to him who he lost. I want to know more but I don't know how to ask.

He keeps looking at the sunset for another moment, murmuring to himself, "He would have loved that… He always wanted to see the world outside… "

I strain my hearing to understand his words and hear him say what I thought I would never.

"I… I am so sorry…"

I can't understand the name that follows but am frozen by what I heard. I am perfectly content standing here like that. For now I am happy that he told me all that, even if it was unintentionally (and created more questions than solved). And I would love to stay for another moment. But apparently Kanda is back to normal as he roughly swats my hand away.

"Che. Baka moyashi. What do you think you are fucking doing, touching me?"

"Well, you see… You looked so sad and I…" I am surprised at how strong his reaction is.

"Che. Idiot! Leave me alone! And forget the shit I just said immediately, baka moyashi!" With that he stomps off, angrier than ever.

I keep looking after him. I stay frozen at the same spot for much more time musing over what I heard from Kanda, his past, my feelings for him and the other side of him I discovered since the beginning of our journey.

I try speaking to him again while we are on the ship, but he seems to be avoiding me intentionally. And every time I catch him, he simply brushes me off with a harsh comment.


Thanks for reading.

Yay! Nezumi and Shion are together! First couple solved!

Let's see how long Kanda and Allen take. The other two took 11 chapters, how much more will they need?

But that's it for now and I hope the confession scene was believable and not too rushed.

From now on I will more focuss on Kanda and Allen since they aren't solved yet.

Also I know Kanda is partly OOC here, but I think that he is a far nicer person than he wants everyone to believe (hard shell, soft core).

By the way how did you encounter DGM or No.6? Or started to read them? Could you tell me, for example in a review?

That would also make me update faster.

So bye for now, I hope to see you next chapter.