"Casey!" Nora reprimanded as she came down the stairs. "I thought I taught you better language than that."

"I know, Mom, it's just—"

"Come on, Nora," George said, covering for Casey. "You know teens today. Everyone talks like that."

"Ew," Nora said, wrinkling her nose in disgust. "Teens actually talk like that?"

"You bet, Mom," Casey said hurriedly. "All the time."

"Perhaps I should transfer you and Derek to a different school. One with a little more… class," Nora thought aloud as she headed towards the kitchen, to the basement door to her room.

"Speaking of you and Derek…"

"Fine, but if I tell you anything you have got to swear, SWEAR that you won't tell anyone else, okay?" Casey said louder and angrier than she'd intended.

"I can't promise that."

"Why not?"

"Because if you are in fact dating your stepbrother, I wouldn't feel right keeping that from your mother."

"Then why should I tell you anything?" Casey asked indignantly.

George smirked and said, "Maybe because I just talked to Abby on the phone a couple minutes ago?"

Casey took a moment to try to think of a response to George's remark, but finally gave up, saying, "Okay, you win."

"It's nice to hear that. I mean, I get that at court all the time, but at home…"

"You couldn't possibly have won that many cases," Casey argued.

"Well, I did," George said, tossing his arm around Casey's shoulders and leading her up the stairs. "And you know how?"

"How?"

"'Cause I'm a very persuasive kind of guy."


"And that's what happened," Casey said, wrapping up the story she'd just told George, who was sitting opposite to her on her bed.

"So you and Derek are really going out?"

"As much as I hate admitting it to you… yes. Yes, we are."

"My Derek?" George questioned.

"Yes, you're Derek."

"But I thought you guys hated each other? You're always bickering and fighting."

"I know," Casey agreed. "But then one night when Derek was getting a bottle for Lucas—"

"Oh, my God," George said worriedly as he grabbed Casey's arm.

"What is it?" Casey asked concernedly.

"That baby," George began, "that baby's not…"

"Derek's and mine?"

George silently nodded.

"No. The baby is definitely someone else's."

"Oh, thank God," George said with a sigh of relief.

"Besides, didn't Derek tell you that Lucas wasn't his?"

"Yes, but I've found it very hard to trust what Derek says lately."

"Why?" Casey asked.

"Is 'he's Derek' enough or should I elaborate?"

"No need," Casey said, smiling to herself at the thought of Derek. "So now that you know about me and Derek, where do we go from here?"

"I say we get Derek to move back in," George answered.

"What?" Casey said, slightly surprised. "But I thought you wouldn't let him back in unless he gave up Lucas?"

"I've been thinking about that and… well, if I can learn to deal with you and my son dating, I can probably deal with Derek taking care of somebody else's kid."

"Out of curiosity, which one's worse?"

"I… have no idea," George confessed. "Honestly, I'm just glad that all this crazy news hasn't given me a heart attack yet."

"I take it I shouldn't tell you about my ditching school today then?"

"You ditched?" George questioned. "Actually, never mind. I don't want to know."

"You're probably better off," Casey said.

"If you need me, I'll be in the basement with your mother, all right?" George said, getting off of Casey's bed and heading for the door.

"Okay, George," Casey said as George left the room.


"Phone's for you," Abby called to Derek that morning.

"Y'ello?" Derek said as he picked up the receiver.

"Hello, Derek," George said on the other end.

"Oh," Derek said disappointedly. "It's you."

"It's you?" George repeated. "Is that any way to talk to your father?"

"No, but then you're not my real father, are you?" Derek shot back.

"Okay, well, is that any way to talk to the man that's inviting you to move back home?"

"Invitation denied," Derek said firmly.

"Derek, are you sure you know what you're saying?" George asked. "I'm offering you to move back home."

"And I don't want to. Besides, Lucas is sleeping a lot more here than he was over at your house. What possible reason could I possibly have to move back?"

"You'd be with Casey."

"So?"

"Your mother told me all about your little relationship, Derek."

"Knowing you, you'd probably make me give that up too if I move back in. Well, no thank you. I'm keeping the baby and I'm keeping my girlfriend."

"You can have both when you move back," George explained. "You can keep going out with your stepsister, however weird that may seem, and you can continue taking care of… what did you call him?"

"Lucas."

"Yes, you can continue taking care of Lucas and you can be back home again."

"You're serious?"

"As crazy as it might sound, yes. Yes, I am."

"Well… okay then," Derek agreed. "I was beginning to miss Smarti and Edwin anyway."

"Feel free to move back in any time today. I don't think anyone will be home until this afternoon, but you've still got your key so you can let yourself in, right?"

"Sure thing."

"Well, I should get ready for work. See you soon."

"You too," Derek said. "Oh, and one more thing."

"Yeah?"

"Thanks, Dad."

"You're welcome, Derek," George said before he hung up the phone.


After explaining the situation to Abby, Derek packed his stuff up and got Lucas ready to go.

"Do you know where we're going?" Derek said to Lucas as he settled him down in the basinet. "We're going back home. Back to Dad and Nora and Marti and Edwin and Lizzie and Casey… ah, Casey," Derek said happily with a passionate sigh.

"Are you nearly ready?" Abby asked as she peeked into Derek's room.

"Just about," Derek answered. "But you know you don't have to wait to drive me home, right? I can walk if you like."

"No, that's fine. I'd be happy to drive you."

"Seriously, Mom, if you have to get to work, go."

"Are you sure?" Abby asked. "Because I'd hate to see you walk all that way. And with a baby in tow nonetheless."

"It's fine," Derek reassured Abby. "I walked all the way here when I first came. It's not that far."

"Are you absolutely sure?"

"Yes!" Derek exclaimed. "Now go! Get to work."

"You're sure you'll get back home all right?"

"I insist you go to work right now," Derek ordered, pointing his finger at the front door.

"It was great having you come stay for a couple days, you know," Abby said as she headed for the door. "Even if it was under… odd circumstances."

"I'll come back again, don't worry," Derek said. "Now would you get to work already?"

"Consider me gone," Abby said as she disappeared out the door.

"I thought she'd never leave," Derek said to Lucas.


"Ready to cross the street?" Derek asked Lucas as the WALK sign came on.

Lucas ignored Derek's question as usual.

"Here we go," Derek said as he crossed the street with Lucas.

Arriving at the other street corner, Derek looked back to discover that Lucas had tossed one of his toys out of his basinet. "Oh, great," Derek muttered as he put Lucas down. "You stay there while I go get your toy, okay?" Derek said as he headed back out onto the crosswalk.

He never even noticed the car heading straight towards him.