Post Death in Heaven - November 2014
Gordon sat at his mother's bedside and held her hand as he watched her dozing. She was important enough to have been given her own room in the hospital, so they at least had some sort of privacy. It was warm in the room, too warm in that way hospitals often were and oddly quiet. Kate was only staying in for twenty four hour observation; despite appearing to be free from obvious injury, she had fallen several thousands of feet from an aeroplane!
She'd been dazed and confused when she'd first come round and the wind had understandably been knocked from her lungs. She'd been quite nauseous and hadn't been able to face food either, so the health care professionals decided that until she'd eaten a couple of full meals, had plenty to drink and showed no further signs of concussion or confusion then she could go home. Her condition had been compounded by the realisation and then later confirmation of the plane crash that had killed several UNIT personnel, including Osgood.
She'd been desperate to leave hospital and deliver the sad news to families herself. She had been so consumed with guilt and grief, even Gordon had known it was too soon and thus a bad idea. Captain Tate had been forced to relieve her of duty and the nurses had given her a sedative to calm her down. Once again Gordy had come so close to losing his mum and he counted every single one of his blessings that she had survived. It was bittersweet though; he'd learned from Clara that it had been his Cyber-converted grandfather who had saved her and that Osgood was lost to them forever. He was gutted, for both himself and his mum. She'd fought so hard against her feelings for the younger woman, out of fear of leaving herself vulnerable to her heart and then the universe had turned on her and broken that heart anyway. He'd never seen his mum so happy in the eighteen months she and Osgood had been together. It helped that he got on well with the scientist and they'd enjoyed spending time getting to know each other.
Kate stirred and Gordon held her hand tighter to let her know that he was there. She took a few moments to wake properly and eventually rolled over to face her visitor.
"Gordy?" Her voice was hoarse and she still sounded full of sleep, a side-effect of the sedatives.
"Hello Mum." He leaned over to kiss her cheek. "Sit up and have some water before you try to talk." Kate sat forward while Gordon propped up the head of the bed using the adjustable stand and puffed up the pillows before she sat back against them. He handed her a cup of water with a straw in it. "Just take a few sips first." Kate did as she was told and then nodded when she'd had enough.
"Thanks love. How long have I been asleep?"
"Just over four hours, it's late. If you're hungry, I got you a sandwich when they came round with dinner." She was hungry but still didn't want to eat as it felt like her stomach was tied in knots, so she simply shook her head in reply. "You've got to eat something otherwise they won't discharge you tomorrow."
"Maybe, in a bit." Kate didn't want to argue with Gordon. "Have you heard anything from Captain Tate?"
"No, but Sarah Jane phoned. She wanted to offer her condolences and make arrangements to see you once you're home." At the mention of condolences Kate swallowed hard at the emotion that choked her senses.
"Gordy, could you do me a favour? I want you to visit Osgood's parents and speak to them on my behalf, face to face. I don't want them to think I've forgotten or don't care about them."
"Of course they won't! They know that you're in hospital and that you'd have seen them if you could."
"It's not good enough Gordy. If it wasn't for me… if I hadn't… she'd still be here. I deserve to face their anger, their blame and the consequences of my actions."
"You're grieving for her too! So am I. It's no one's fault Mum, it's the nature of your job. Think about how many people you did save."
"Please Gordy? I need to feel like I'm doing something." Gordon nodded reluctantly, just to placate his mum to make her feel better.
"Okay, first thing tomorrow, it's too late tonight."
"Thank you."
Gordon approached the door and rang the bell. It only took a few moments for it to be answered by Osgood's father.
"Hello Sir."
"Hello. Gordon isn't it?"
"Yes sir. Sorry to disturb you at a time like this but I was wondering if you had a moment?"
"Of course, please come in." Tom ushered Gordy into the living room where Osgood's mum was sitting on the settee with a cup of tea and a notebook in her hands.
"Becky, you remember Gordon don't you? Kate's son."
"Ah, yes. Hello love, how's your mum doing?"
"Fine… sort of… not really, that's why I'm here. She's terribly sorry that she couldn't see you in person, to tell you herself, about… They won't discharge her from hospital just yet, otherwise she'd be here." Becky patted the space on the settee next to her and indicated that she wanted Gordon to sit down. She took his hand in hers as he did so.
"Oh love, we understand that. She hasn't suffered any injuries has she?"
"She was pretty winded and shocked when she first came round. She was so distraught they eventually had to sedate her. Hopefully she'll be a bit better today after a good long sleep. I'm hoping they'll let her come home this afternoon." Gordy hesitated for a moment before he began speaking again. "She's so very sorry about what happened. She blames herself and she knows that you're within your rights to feel angry at her. I'm really upset about everything too." Tom had listened to Gordon and Becky as they spoke. He put a firm hand on his shoulder and looked him in the eye.
"Son, my daughter chose to follow my footsteps into UNIT. She and I knew perfectly well what she was walking into from her very first day. We're devastated, she was a very special person and our eldest child and we'll never really get over this. But your mum is not to blame herself; she's probably just as upset as we are. I know she would have done the right thing and had to make some difficult decisions very quickly. I know, I've been there myself and your grandfather did the best he could at the time."
"Thank you sir, you're very kind."
"None of this 'Sir' business lad! Call me Tom, please."
"I don't think I've ever seen my mum as happy as she's been in the last couple of years since she and Osgood got together. They seemed so right for each other, like they just fit." Becky seemed to go quiet at Gordon's obvious approval of his mother's relationship with her daughter but Tom smiled widely and nodded.
"Me too Gordon, me too. She always had a twinkle in her eye whenever she mentioned your mum, right from the very beginning."
"I'm sorry I can't stay very long. I want to get back so I can pick Mum up as soon as they discharge her."
"Thank you for coming, we really appreciate it."
"Mum also said that she wanted to help you with arrangements for a service or whatever you wanted to do to honour Osgood. Money's no object, just make sure it's what you want for her and we'll sort out the rest."
"What I want is for her to be alive and well and standing here right now!" Becky could no longer hold back her anger. Gordon had been expecting it and had been surprised they'd been so amenable up until now.
"Becky…." Tom tried to calm his wife down.
"No Tom! I'm sorry, no disrespect to you or your mother Gordon but I didn't like her influence on my daughter. She could have got married, had a family. Now we have to live without her and she'll never get to realise her potential."
"You know that's not what our Oz wanted love. She died doing a job she enjoyed and she was with the person she loved. We've been through this a dozen times already and it's not really something the lad should be hearing. I'm sorry Gordon."
"It's fine S..Tom, you're both entitled to say what you feel."
"We're all still in shock. Tell you what, when your mum's been home for a couple of days and you think she's up to visitors, let us know and we'll pop over. We can talk about any arrangements then yeah?"
Gordy went to visit his mum back at the hospital in the early afternoon. He brought some spare casual clothes with him as she had requested. He was prepared to stay until he could take her back home with him, but the nurses still seemed a bit reluctant even though Kate had managed some breakfast of buttered toast and then soup and a sandwich for lunch. She was running a slight temperature and was a bit wobbly on her feet when she'd got up to go to the loo, but otherwise she had no ill-effects from her ordeal, physically at least. Of course she'd asked how Tom and Becky were when he had visited and Gordon decided to give her the abridged version for the time being. Kate had seemed temporarily placated by that, at least they knew her thoughts were with them even if she couldn't be in person. She'd received a new mobile phone handset from someone at UNIT during the night, so she had been able to get back to work in some capacity from her hospital bed. The nurses hadn't been too happy but Kate was both stubborn and independent and didn't take to anyone telling her otherwise. At least she had felt useful in the wake of The Master's interference. Of course, the Doctor was nowhere to be seen but Clara had been in contact. They decided that the telephone wasn't the best method of having a conversation about everything that had happened and that Clara would visit Kate once she was back at work in a day or so.
After a few hours Kate was finally discharged in the late afternoon with full instructions to rest for a further forty-eight hours and not to go back to work until after then. Gordy sniggered; he doubted she'd last even a day and fully expected her to pop into The Tower tomorrow morning sometime. Kate changed into her jeans and a loose fitting top and then Gordon drove her home. She was understandably quiet on the way and kept looking out of the window at the world around them. It was surprising how quickly everyone just went back to normal after everything the previous day, almost as though it had never happened at all. Gordon supposed that the only real damage was to the cemeteries, St Paul's and Boat One. St Paul's was still in lock down with UNIT officers systematically investigating every corner of the famous cathedral in the hope of gaining some insight into Missy/The Master and how she was able to be right under their noses this whole time. Clara had explained that the Cyberman who had saved her, presumably her father, had shot and disintegrated Missy but Kate knew the files in regards to her previous regenerations and their antics inside out and doubted that was the end of the story.
Kate had spoken to Captain Tate and in her absence, and at the loss of Osgood as her second in command, she authorised them to take temporary control of the Taskforce. She had explained what she wanted to happen with the cemeteries across the world, getting Captain Tate to ensure International agreement that all governments would carry out the same actions. There would be pockets of local authorities and those with only rudimentary systems who wouldn't comply, but a reasonably uniform approach was the best she could hope for at the moment. There had been twelve people on board Boat One. Twelve sets of families Kate was duty and morally bound to offer some sort of comfort and compensation to. Captain Tate had that mostly in hand too, although she had requested that they leave anything to do with Osgood for her to be responsible for.
Gordon set to work making his mum a cup of tea and something substantial to eat as soon as they had arrived home. He knew that if left to her own devices, she'd not eat or drink a single thing. If she returned to work early in the morning, like he suspected she would, then she would need to keep her strength up for a long day ahead of her. Kate flopped heavily on the settee, relieved to be at home and back in her own surroundings. She couldn't fault the hospital and she had been privileged to have her own private room but it wasn't the same as being in control of herself.
Tommy had been stalking Gordon in the kitchen until he'd set down a bowl and ripped open a pouch of food; which had lasted less than sixty seconds. The ginger cat then sought out his mistress and happened upon Kate on the settee. With a delicate, practised leap, suddenly Kate had a lap full of fluff and a grateful rough tongue licked her hands as she ran her fingers through his fur. The tears came then, slowly at first; unconsciously falling down her face as she continued to pet the cat she co-parented. Something inside of her broke, her heart probably, and the dam of emotion burst forth. Wracking sobs reverberated through her body and she shook with the weight of it all. Poor Tommy had no idea what had happened to his mistress but he held firm and remained in her lap offering what small comfort he could. Of course Gordy had heard the cries from the kitchen and he'd stuck his head round the door to check on his mum. He felt so incredibly sorry for her in that moment and ran to her side in an instant. He scooped her up into his arms and allowed her to sob on his shoulder for as long as it took.
Kate leaned against the door frame and looked out onto her beloved garden. Once her work and career with UNIT had stepped up several gears, she'd needed to do something that was both relaxing and satisfying. Since Gordy had grown out of destroying any plants she did have with a football, she had taken up gardening. She'd got some hints and tips from Doris and her father before they had both passed away but it was clear that she had inherited yet another family trait and found that she was actually quite good at it. She was mightily proud of her garden and despite the fact that Tommy had decided a couple of shrubs made a good hiding spot, he had been fairly respectful of her efforts so far. Osgood had been impressed the first time she'd seen it and they'd sat outside with a couple of beers admiring the view, both of the garden and each other.
Kate inhaled on her cigarette and let out the smoke slowly through her mouth as she watched the drizzle saturate the garden. It was wet and grey and she felt no sense of pleasure in realising it reflected her mood perfectly. A hand placed itself gently on her shoulder and ran its way down her arm before squeezing her sideways into a hug. Kate hadn't needed to look up to know who it was, her touch and scent was familiar and welcome. Kate didn't lean into the embrace, partly to protect her visitor from being burned by the cigarette but also because she wanted to keep herself in check, lest she have another breakdown.
"I'm so terribly sorry Kate; I don't really know what to say." Both Sarah Jane and Maria had been devastated to hear of Osgood's untimely death. The two couples had become rather close through their shared experiences and history. Maria had been particularly friendly with the younger scientist after they had worked alongside each other during Osgood's secondment to Torchwood. Kate didn't know what to say either; words didn't seem enough and any sentiments hollow and false. Sarah Jane knew her well enough to understand that without being told and kept one arm loosely about her waist, gently supporting her and letting her know that she was there.
After a while, when Kate had finished her cigarette, she turned and faced her friend to look her in the eye. Sarah Jane had seen her when she'd lost her father and now she was facing the grieving process all over again. Kate could hold it in no more and broke down in her friend's arms, knowing that she wouldn't be judged for letting out her heartache and sorrow.
The memorial service had been a necessary but painful procedure and Kate had felt like she was on the outside looking in. Tom and Becky had eventually come round one evening and they'd spoken at length about the events which had led to their daughter's death and the decisions Kate had made at the time. Becky was still frosty with Kate but they were amenable enough to discuss the memorial service. Tom had been keen to allow Kate anything she wanted or that she thought that Osgood would have wanted but she had been reluctant to voice her thoughts. Eventually they settled on something for everyone, not least of all something that made it a fitting tribute to the woman herself.
Kate had stood to give a eulogy, from her perspective as Osgood's boss first but then something slightly more personal She'd wrestled with whether to mention it or not for ages and had sought Tom's advice as well as Sarah Jane's. They had told her that if it was something she felt she wanted to do then she should. Everyone in the laboratory knew of their relationship and most people on the front line at UNIT. No doubt the news would still surprise some people but they were the ones who didn't matter and probably wouldn't be at the memorial service anyway.
Kate had admittedly struggled with the eulogy, the pain of her loss still raw and some part of her still refused to believe it was real. Gordon, Sarah Jane and Maria had been there on the day, as well as Osgood's parents, sister, brother-in-law and nieces. She'd spoken of their long friendship, recalled Osgood's kindness from that very first day and remarked upon her wit and their shared sense of humour. She acknowledged that the younger woman had kept her grounded and had offered essential unwavering support in her early days in charge of UNIT. Kate also admitted her own personal fear of developing their relationship further and recalled the incident with the two rifts colliding that eventually brought them together. After her speech and one from Tom, who noted Osgood's happiness during her relationship with Kate, there had not been a dry eye left in the house.
After memorial services had been carried out for all the fallen UNIT personnel, life slowly returned to normal. Well, not exactly normal but there was still plenty of work to be done and Kate wanted to be ready for the next time the Master made an unwelcome appearance.
A Year Earlier
Kate fiddled with the zip at the back of her dress. Dresses weren't her first choice of attire and she would be more comfortable in a trouser suit, but Sarah Jane had asked and how could she have refused one of her oldest friends? Besides, it was only going to be for a couple of hours as she was determined to change out of it as soon as they got to the reception afterwards. Perhaps it was something to do with pockets because Kate had a habit of resting her hands in them. It gave her a casual air of confidence and authority as well as a very handy place to keep her mobile phone! Sarah, on the other hand, looked gorgeous in a simple white gown and the smile on her face said it all really. Sarah Jane tutted loudly at her friend making a show of being awkward and spun her around to sort out the issue with the zip; it had got caught on a small piece of the material which was why it seemed to be irritating Kate somewhat.
"How are you feeling?" Kate asked the predictable question, feeling that as her friend and bridesmaid she perhaps ought to.
"Fine really. It's not going to make any big difference to us other than celebrating our relationship with our friends and family and making a provision for the future. Honestly, it's not that big of a deal." Sarah Jane had surprised herself when she and Maria had first talked about getting married. Then again, since Maria had come along everything she thought she knew about herself had been tested.
"I'm still terrified at the thought of it!"
"Even now, with Osgood?"
"Yes. It's not that I don't love her; I do, I really do, but I've never really felt that it was a requirement." Sarah knew the wounds ran deep for Kate and her parents' history was never far from her mind. Both she and Kate also held very strong feminist beliefs and buying into the patriarchal institution just to replicate societal norms was something they had both wanted to avoid.
"Does she feel the same?"
"She knew how I felt when we got together." Kate still had some way to go with the etiquette of relationships and how communication was a vital element to their survival.
"But have you asked her about it?"
"No." Of course they hadn't had a direct conversation about commitment or anything as serious as marriage but Kate had spoken about her feelings on the subject in the past and was confident Osgood had no expectations of that sort.
"I think that you perhaps ought to at some point, just to make sure and then you both know exactly where you stand. Number one rule of relationships Kate, never assume you know what your partner is thinking and always talk about it!" At least Sarah Jane was on hand to give her friend some much needed advice, no matter how much Kate didn't really want to hear it.
"Come on, we've got to get a move on if we're going to make it to the registry office on time." Kate swiftly changed the subject and concentrated on the task at hand.
The ceremony had been lovely, simple and understated but no less intimate and emotional. Only a handful of friends and family had gathered into the small registry office in Ealing. Kate had been selected as a witness as well as Sarah Jane's son Luke. She'd met Maria's parents for the first time and got along brilliantly with her dad. Maria's mum wasn't quite Kate's cup of tea but she'd made a point to introduce herself anyway. This was the first occasion where Kate had introduced Osgood as her partner instead of assistant and it felt both odd and exciting at the same time. After the ceremony they had headed to a local community hall for the reception. Luke and Maria's friend Clyde was in charge of the music, their other friend Rani had organised the catering and her mum had sorted out all the flowers and decorated the hall.
Later in the evening, Kate glanced over at Osgood as she sat at a large round table chatting to some of the other guests. Sarah Jane's words resonated in her head and she took a few moments to think back on the last few months and their relationship. It had gone from strength to strength and the seriousness of it had been swift but surprisingly smooth. Kate was still terrified of that ultimate commitment and honestly couldn't imagine ever changing her mind. But looking at Osgood, enjoying the atmosphere of the occasion, she realised that she had never loved anyone more. It was an alien feeling but something about it also felt right at the same time. Kate knew that she had to make some kind of a gesture to show her lover that she was invested in their relationship. They had talked, intimately about various subjects and their relationships, both romantic and working alike, were strong. It's just that she'd never addressed the subject of her fear of commitment or spoken about outlined their expectations of the future.
The music changed to something slow and romantic and for once she decided to let go of her reputation and do something that she wanted to do. Kate approached Osgood's table and held her hand out for her to take. The younger woman looked up in surprise but grinned her assent anyway. She allowed herself to be pulled up and out of her seat and into the waiting embrace of her girlfriend. They danced to the entire song, entwined in each other's arms and softly murmured words of affection between them. The music dramatically changed to something up tempo and they laughed and danced along with it, carefree for once in their lives. Neither had had so much fun in ages and it hadn't gone unnoticed by the bridal party in the background. Kate indicated to Osgood that she wanted to slip outside for a while, away from the joviality of the party and have a few moments of time alone. The older woman took her lover by the hand and led her through the throng of revellers to the beautifully kept gardens outside. They walked in silence for a while, each reflecting on their own thoughts and feelings before Kate felt ready speak her mind.
"It's been such a lovely day." Kate said it wistfully and knew that it was a day she wasn't going to forget in a hurry. Sadly, she hadn't actually been to that many weddings before.
"It has, hasn't it? Even if you did have to wear a dress for some of it!" Osgood nudged Kate in her side and the older woman chuckled.
"Yeah! They did look very happy though, didn't they? I'm really pleased for them." There was absolutely no jealousy or residual feeling in Kate for Sarah Jane and she was very comfortable in the friendship they now had.
"Me too, and after so much uncertainty in the beginning, particularly for Maria." It hadn't really occurred to Kate before now how very much aligned their relationship journey had been to Sarah Jane and Maria's.
"I'm terribly sorry that I put you through something similar, you deserved so much more than that. I don't know why you put up with me to be honest!"
"You had your reasons for it at the time. As painful as it was, we got there in the end and I wouldn't change a thing if it meant we wouldn't be standing here now."
"I brought you out here to ask you something." The look of complete shock on Osgood's face told Kate that she'd immediately misinterpreted what she had been intending to say. "I can't make you the same promises that Sarah Jane and Maria have made to each other today. I wish I could but it's just not in me to be that person."
"It's fine Kate, you don't have to explain yourself. I kind of knew that when we first got together."
"But I do want us to make a commitment to each other; I'd like us to live together full time. And, if anything should ever happen to one of us, I'd like to make you a promise, anything at all, which says the same thing just in a different way." Osgood beamed at Kate and nodded enthusiastically.
"I'd like that very much. I already spend most of my free time at your house and Tommy's made himself quite at home, it seems a natural progression. And I think we know each other well enough by now not to kill each other in the process!" They both chuckled at that and then Kate grew serious.
"We also know just how dangerous our lives can be, all too well unfortunately. We need to make provisions should anything untoward happen." It was a sobering thought but Kate was right, working for UNIT wasn't the safest job in the world and making provision for the future was a sensible idea.
"What sort of thing were you thinking of?"
"For example, I know he's technically an adult but he's all I've got left in this world so I'd want you to look out for Gordy; be the mother that he'll need when I'm gone and grandmother to his future children. You're the only one I'd trust to love him the way that I do and you've got such a wonderful relationship already; it's not that much of a stretch to imagine that developing." Osgood had to wipe the tears from her eyes she was so overcome with emotion. "Tell me what you're thinking?" Kate said it kindly, willing to listen to whatever reaction her wish was going to provoke.
"I don't like you talking that way Kate, I almost lost you once and I can't bear the thought of it happening again."
"I know sweetheart but we have to be realistic here."
"I am honoured that you'd trust me with the care of your child, even if he is a fully grown adult!" They both chuckled at that. Kate had been right; she and Gordon had developed a really lovely relationship over the last few months. She could see that he cared deeply for his mum and for some strange reason he seemed to wholeheartedly approve of their relationship.
"And I want to return that commitment and trust as well, but you can take your time and think about it if you want." Kate had been thinking about this for a little while anyway, before Sarah Jane had cemented the thought in her head.
"No, I already know what I'd ask from you, it's just incredibly sad thinking about it."
"Please, tell me."
"Grace and Isabelle, I'd want you to make sure they were looked after, tell them about me, about how much I loved them and played with them. Be the Aunt that I would no longer be able to be for them. Let them tell you their secrets, be a friend and confidante if they couldn't talk to their parents." They were still young but Grace had already grown into a habit of telling her aunt little 'secrets.' Not that they were anything significant and Osgood always told her sister (who already knew) anyway. And it was really only kid stuff like which person she was friends with this week or not. Kate took a few moments to think on Osgood's words and wishes.
"They're wonderful children and do I love them already. I'm just not sure I'd be quite the sort of aunt you've been to them so far. I've never even considered being an aunt before, having been an only child, but I would try. I promise you that I would do my best by them, if the need arose, which it won't." Osgood shook her head and willed the sorrowful, morbid thoughts away.
"I love you." The younger woman said reverently and pressed her lips firmly against Kate's.
"I love you too."
February 2015
"Did Osgood ever tell you the difficulties James and I had conceiving the girls?" Kate shook her head and took a sip of her tea. She was sat in Osgood's sister's living room and waited patiently for Suzanne to tell her story. "When you first told me what you wanted to do, the promise you'd made her to fill her role and develop a relationship with them, for a moment I thought that she might have. But she always honoured her promises and that secrets would always remain secret. Kate, what I'm about to tell you goes no further, not even Mum and Dad know the truth, I don't think they'd ever really understand it." Kate looked up at Suzanne in surprise; she had funny feeling settle in her stomach and her heart rate sped up in anticipation. She had a feeling she knew what was coming. "After a long time of trying without success, doctors discovered that my eggs weren't viable even though medically speaking I would be able to carry a baby to term and give birth naturally. Long story short, Osgood offered to donate her eggs so that there would still be a DNA connection. In other words, she's technically the girls' biological mother." Kate took an inward breath at the shocking news and tried to process it in her own mind before she voiced her thoughts to Suzanne.
"I had no idea, she didn't say a word to me. Of course I'd noticed how much they looked like her, Grace especially, but I had just assumed a strong family resemblance."
"Most people do. She was adamant that she didn't want anything more than a normal Aunt/Niece relationship with them. As far as I'm aware she had absolutely no regrets and felt happy with the arrangement. I'm incredibly humbled by what she did for us, having those two girls has fulfilled me, made my life complete and I don't know what I would have done had I not been able to be a mother. I'm sure she's told you that our relationship hasn't always been smooth?" Kate nodded as she remembered what Osgood had told her about her family situation back when they'd first met. "It brought us together, closer than we'd ever been before and changed our relationship considerably." There was a natural lull in the conversation and they both sat and reflected for a few minutes.
"Now that I know, does this change anything? Why did you choose to tell me now? Did you want me to stop seeing the girls so much?" Kate tried not to sound too upset but just when she'd discovered a stronger connection to her lost love, she felt like she was losing her all over again.
"Oh no, on the contrary. I've seen the time and effort you've put into your relationship with the girls, Gordon too for that matter, and I felt it was the right time for you to know the truth. I don't want their memory of her to fade and you're just the person to keep it alive, for as long as you want to."
While Kate had been making an effort with Osgood's nieces outside of work; life as Head of Scientific Research at UNIT was an altogether different story. Kate had never felt more alone; Sarah Jane was keeping things under control at her end while balancing it with her long distance marriage to Maria in Cardiff, both her father and Osgood were gone and the Doctor hadn't deigned to get in touch since Missy had appeared on the scene. Clara had mentioned something in passing around Christmas time but hadn't really elaborated on whatever the situation had been. Kate was considering making use of Clara and her experience from her recent travels with the Doctor, but she hadn't quite got as far as working out just how to go about it yet. She was confident she'd be able to work something out; after all she'd done it before with Maria and Torchwood.
McGillop had been pestering her about getting a replacement for Osgood for several weeks now. Not that he'd put it that way of course, but Kate had understood what he had been getting at anyway. She realised that she'd been unconsciously pushing work that would have normally been Osgood's responsibility to him, and he had a full enough workload as it was. It was just that Kate couldn't bring herself to even consider replacing her assistant; everything was still just a haze of emotion and grief and she wondered if it would ever end.
That was until one day when McGillop requested a meeting with his boss and brought along company. Jac was an admittedly striking woman; with very long, thick, curly hair, dark-rimmed glasses and a sophisticated dress sense. She was courteous and intelligent, respectful to authority but also spoke her mind. McGillop explained to his boss that he had no longer been able to cope with the workload, they weren't just one man down but several and he'd needed some assistance. Jac had been most highly qualified; she was a computer technician but had been a scientist in a previous job as well as extremely organised and super keen. McGillop could see that she was a perfect candidate for the role of Assistant to the Head of UNIT. Kate had felt ambushed but had been polite in front of the newcomer. Once the introductions had been made and Jac politely dismissed, Kate had then turned to McGillop and addressed the elephant in the room.
"That was very underhand; I don't appreciate you undermining my authority like that." It was rare for Kate to express such restrained anger; she frequently barked out orders authoritatively and occasionally disappointment when something went wrong, but hardly ever anger.
"No, you're right and I apologise but only partly. Kate, you need to start getting back to reality, you've been in a fog for too long." Kate's behaviour since the incident with Missy, the Cybermen and the crash of Boat One was widely spoken of around the labs. McGillop wondered if other departments had noticed too and if so, he worried that her authority might start to come into question.
"I'm bloody grieving!"
"Yes, we all understand that but there's also a job that needs to be done too. I couldn't cope on my own anymore and you weren't doing anything about it so I decided to take the decision out of your hands. Give her a chance, she's bloody brilliant at her job and I think you'd come to like her eventually."
"Osgood's barely been dead five minutes! I thought you were her friend?"
"It's been four months Kate! I haven't forgotten her and I miss her every day but we need to be ready for when the next time The Master decides to toy with us, or whatever alien species picks us as their next target. We need to get ourselves back on our feet and come back stronger than ever. For Osgood, for her memory, otherwise she would have died for nothing." Kate had nothing left to say and after a few moments of awkward silence, McGillop turned and left her office in pursuit of Jac.
McGillop had felt he owed Jac and explanation for the behaviour of his frosty boss and outlined the will-they, won't-they saga of Kate and Osgood's relationship and then the younger woman's recent untimely death and the events surrounding it. Jac understood that Kate was still grieving and that although she was very much needed at UNIT, it may take some time for Kate to warm to her. However, she had a good feeling about this new job and already wanted to put her heart and soul into it, even if she was going to have to work hard to get the boss to like her.
Kate wearily sat back in the chair at her desk and sighed heavily. She knew that she had been avoiding dealing with Osgood's death and not replacing her at UNIT was another one of the things she had neglected to do. Jac had been lovely and her CV spoke for itself. McGillop was right; Kate already liked the woman and saw that she could probably grow to depend on her as an assistant. It unsettled her so she reached into the one of the drawers of her desk and pulled out a photograph she'd hidden away since Osgood's memorial service. It was a candid shot of them both, taken by Gordy one rare lazy Sunday afternoon spent together as a family. They'd been sitting in the garden, a couple of beers by their side and wrapped unselfconsciously in each other's arms. She reverently brushed her thumb over Osgood's widely smiling face and reassuringly whispered that Jac could never replace her and that she would never be forgotten.
As well as ensuring she had time set aside to spend with Osgood's nieces, Kate had also taken on an allotment. Her garden had been a project of sorts for a number of years but it was now at a point where she was simply maintaining it. An allotment would ensure a continuous range of jobs for her to do; somewhere she could escape to and tinker about in at her will. It also meant that she had to make time for this endeavour too, otherwise it would quickly become overgrown and she'd risk having it taken away from her. Gordon kept his hand in, on occasion if she really was desperate for time, but ultimately it was her responsibility. Some people might have said that it was another way of avoiding her feelings, delaying the grieving process by making herself so busy she didn't have time to be by herself and think. However, the girls seemed to enjoy visiting the allotment and they were often curious and wanted to learn more about growing vegetables. Kate was pleased she'd managed to find an activity that they could share and that was unique to them.
Present Day, September 2015
The two little girls delighted in being pushed higher and higher on the swings. Their laughter warmed Kate's heart and she could even hear Gordy's low chuckle mixed in with theirs. They were quite taken with Gordy, giving him the honorary title of 'uncle' after only a few weeks of getting to know him. They liked that he played rough and tumble with them and that he let them get away with most things like jumping all over him or letting them play with his hair! They were almost the siblings or cousins he never had growing up. Kate was the cuddle giver, the one to stick on a plaster and kiss it better when things had gone wrong and she was also the one to suggest large hot chocolates with whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles! She was a real softy at heart, lest any of her UNIT colleagues find out! Kate had almost forgotten what it was like to have little ones around. It hadn't been easy bringing up Gordy alone and sometimes she wondered if she had missed out on some of the little joyous things along the way.
The girls were quite different from each other; one blonde-haired, blue-eyed gregarious one and the other, dark-haired, dark-eyed introverted one. It was heartbreakingly obvious that they took after their mum and their aunt respectively; or should that have been the other way round, since Kate was now aware of their true heritage? But she'd kept her promise and not told anyone of her discussion with Suzanne; in fact they'd not really spoken about it with each other either. It was enough to simply know the truth.
Gordy had been the first one to notice; he'd suddenly stopped what he had been doing and focused on something just outside of the playground. Kate went to ask him what he was looking at but he simply pointed somewhere behind her instead. She turned around at the same time as the girls, who screamed in delight at what they saw.
"Auntie Oz!" They ran up to the woman who was now standing inside the playground. She was dressed in a light brown knitted jumper with dark brown ribbed cuffs and hem, as well as two elbow patches along the arms. Underneath she wore a shirt with question marks on each side of the collar. The last time Kate had seen her was the day she had died and she didn't appear to look too different from then. Kate's rational, scientific mind pointed out that it wasn't possible but the emotional part of her was rapidly overtaking such thoughts. Kate stood where she was in shock while the girls hugged and cried over their aunt's miraculous reappearance. Gordy gently put an arm around his mother's waist to offer support without words. After a few moments of placating her nieces, Osgood looked up and made eye contact with Kate. They seemed to start to move towards each other at the same moment but Kate stopped and put a hand out when the younger woman was in arm's reach.
"Who are you?" The head of UNIT questioned her with suspicion, knowing instinctively that she could never trust what she saw with her eyes alone.
"Kate, it's me. I promise." Kate shook her head in disbelief.
"You were killed by Missy, before Boat One went down. Clara told me." Gordy tapped her elbow and pointed out someone who had joined them in the playground. Osgood knew who it was but threw a glance at him over her shoulder anyway. Kate looked and saw The Doctor watching them. He looked just the same as before too; salt and pepper hair, those thick, independently expressive eyebrows and the same dark cape. The girls were excitedly trying to the get his attention and Gordy went over to help the Time Lord out as well as allow his mum a few moments of privacy.
"He's probably the best person to explain it to you but I assure you that I am the real me. I remember everything that happened that day, the last thing we said to each other, the way you grabbed my hand when you thought no one was looking." Kate wondered if Missy had sensed the bond between her and Osgood and had deliberately chosen to harm her as a result. It had been just another way of her grieving mind finding some way of blaming herself for Osgood's death.
"I can't… I don't…" Osgood nodded in understanding. She'd probably feel the same sense of disbelief if she was faced with the same seemingly impossible miracle.
"You kept your promise." Osgood observed, trying a different tactic.
"Of course, how could I not?" Kate's voice cracked and shook her head in disbelief once again. "This isn't happening."
"I assure you it is." Osgood took a couple of steps closer and Kate half-heartedly tried to stop her. The younger woman reached out and grabbed hold of one of Kate's hands that had been hanging loosely by her side. "I'm warm and alive and real. Feel my pulse, the blood running through my veins." Kate instinctively clasped the hand holding hers.
"I'm a scientist, you know that I can't just take your word for it." Osgood smiled, she wouldn't have expected anything less.
"Ask me something that only the real me would know."
"If you've been cloned, all your memories would be too." Osgood had to concede on that point and for a moment it looked like Kate wasn't going to be convinced either way. Perhaps the Doctor would have more luck when he eventually made it over to them?
"Your sister and I had a chat, when I first asked about spending time with the girls. She assumed I already knew the truth." Kate seemingly changed the direction and tone of the conversation. But she carefully observed Osgood's face when it fell slightly at the implication of her words and saw several different emotions reflected in her eyes.
"I'm sorry; I didn't deliberately keep it from you because I didn't trust you…"
"It's okay. I understand your reasons, that you don't consider them to be yours. Grace is so like you, it's uncanny. But the more time I spend with them, the more I can see your sister in them too." Osgood felt relieved that Kate finally knew; she'd never been comfortable keeping the secret from her but did so out of loyalty to her sister. Then something occurred to her.
"How long has it been?"
"Nine months."
"Oh, I'd hoped it wasn't quite that long. I did ask the Doctor do get us back as close to that day as possible. I'm so very sorry, it must have been quite difficult for you?"
"It's been awful to be honest." Finally the Doctor had managed to free himself from Gordy and the girls and had appeared in front of Kate and Osgood.
"I see you two are getting reacquainted?" It was said casually, in that arrogant way the Doctor seemed to have sometimes. As though it were an everyday occurrence that a woman seemingly came back from the dead.
"What's going on? How is this even possible? Is it true?" Kate continued to hold firm to Osgood's hand, even with a small amount of doubt she was reluctant to break their connection now that she'd come back into her life.
"I promise you, she's as real as you and I. We had some nasty business with a few Zygons, all sorted now by the way. You might find you have some extra memories you didn't have before, but we can talk about that later. You should be proud of her, almost had her for a companion but she was adamant she wanted to get back to you, can't think why..." He winked at Kate then and she rolled her eyes in exasperation.
"Why? Why would you do this for us?" Kate didn't think she was anything special, just an ordinary woman doing her bit to look after her city.
"Because I can. Because I am the Doctor and I save people. Because you need to be together; all of time and space and wherever there's a Lethbridge-Stewart there's an Osgood." It seemed too fantastical to be real and Kate wondered if she was going to wake up from a dream. "There's more; you still have much work to do, the universe needs you and it won't be easy. But if you have each other, anything's possible."
