18th September 1969
"Dromeda, this has to stop." Narcissa hissed over the table that morning.
They had only been back at school for a few weeks and already, Narcissa was getting tired of her sister's relationship with Ted Tonks. Most people were turning a blind eye at Andromeda's gazing at the mudblood and at how the two would sneak off when they thought no-one was watching.
Andromeda filled her goblet with more pumpkin juice and helped herself to another slice of toast, raising an eyebrow as if she had no idea what Narcissa was talking about.
"Has someone slipped you a babbling beverage?"
Narcissa shook her head, "Do not pretend that you have no idea what I am talking about. Last year you were more discreet because you feared what Bella would do if she found out about you and that mudblood. And now you think that because our sister has graduated and she is not here to curse you for associating with a mudblood that you can go around more careless."
Andromeda blinked, "You assume me and Ted to be in a relationship?"
Narcissa scoffed in disbelief, even now her sister would continue to deny their relationship.
"I may be blonde but that doesn't mean I live up to the stereotype of being an airhead. I know full well that you're in love with him and have been for some time. This has to stop Andromeda, if it doesn't then I'll tell mother and father all about your associations with the mudbloods here and Aunt Walburga will blast you off the family tree."
Andromeda glared at her, the two sisters had agreed to have breakfast together and now it had turned sour. The whole time that the two of them had been sat at the Slytherin table, Narcissa had noticed that every now and then Andromeda would turn her attention to the Hufflepuff table in hopes that Ted would be eating breakfast at the same time as her. Narcissa had had enough, she had had to put up with her sister's gazes and closeness when she saw the two together and had only kept quiet due to Bellatrix's anger issues. Now Bella was gone, she could speak to Andromeda about the problem.
"You wouldn't dare, do you really wish that for me?" Andromeda challenged.
"You know that nothing can ever come from your relationship with him, you know that father is trying to arrange a match for you. So why do you continue to risk everything you have for someone who we believe unworthy for you?"
"Because you are right Narcissa, I am in love with him. I do not care that he's a muggleborn, he sees something in me that nobody else does. You think him unworthy for me? That's fine, because there are those that I believe unworthy for you but yet you still socialise with them and kiss them when-
Narcissa held up her hand, knowing that her sister had been told about her kiss with Lucius the previous month.
"Did Evan tell you? He promised he would not say anything."
Andromeda shook her head, "Evan wasn't the only one who witnessed your little moment with Malfoy."
"That's all it was Andromeda."
"Seemed like you were really into it. I just hope that you don't live up to the reputation of an airhead by falling for Malfoy, for he could never love you in return."
"How would you know?"
"He's cruel, you know what happened to Marina Flint last week? That was dark and although she wouldn't name who cursed her like that, the satisfied smile on Malfoy's face told me that he did it."
Narcissa shook her head in disbelief, she couldn't believe yet another person was telling her that Lucius could never love. Evan had explained to her that he had had a deep connection and love for his mother and when Evelyn Malfoy had died all those years ago, Lucius's heart broke from grief. She knew that he was cold and sometimes cruel, but she had seen something different in him. The time that they had spent together, the things he had said to her; were they all a lie? She felt that he meant them.
"I know how you feel about Lucius, Andromeda; for you've hardly made it a secret that you despise him. But he's been a very good friend to me since we first met and that's all he ever will be. That kiss we shared was a moment of comfort and nothing more."
Before Andromeda could reply, Narcissa watched as her sister's gaze went to someone standing behind her. She too turned and her eyes met the grey ones that belonged to Lucius. Andromeda rose from the table in smug satisfaction and left the hall, leaving Narcissa alone with Lucius.
"Lucius I-
He sat down next to her, helping himself to some toast and pumpkin juice. Since their kiss things had been slightly awkward between them and she felt like he was avoiding her a little. She didn't want to lose Lucius as a friend.
"There is no need to apologise Narcissa. For you are right when you said to your sister that it was nothing more than a moment of comfort."
She smiled slightly, "How have you been?"
"Okay, my father has set me up to court Penelope Zabini." he replied, as if disgusted.
"Zabini? You can do a lot better than her."
Lucius nodded his agreement and took a bite out of his toast. Narcissa couldn't believe that Abraxas would set his son up with someone in the Zabini family. The Zabini's, although they were a pure-blooded family, were one of the poorer families in pure-blood society. Narcissa knew that her father had been friends with Penelope's father when they were teenagers and had overheard Cygnus telling Druella about how when they all graduated and had received their inheritance, Abraham Zabini had either gambled away most of his family fortune or spent it on expensive prostitutes. Since then, the Zabini's were unable to get high posts at the Ministry and were mostly secretaries on a low wage.
"Well I hope she'll make the ideal wife for you one day."
Lucius spluttered on his pumpkin juice, looking at her curiously.
"I never said she was to become my fiancé."
"That's how these things go Lucius, you've seen what my sister was forced into. You may not like Penelope but your father has set you up with her on the hopes of her becoming your wife when you graduate."
"I have no intention of marrying her, she only wants me for my money. I believe that my match lies elsewhere, it should be with someone who knows me like no-one else does. Who can love me for me and my flaws."
Narcissa sighed, "And could you love them in return?"
Lucius blinked, "I don't believe myself capable of giving my heart to someone. Love is weakness, Narcissa." he answered.
She nodded before picking up her schoolbag and leaving the Great Hall. As Lucius watched her leave, he put down his goblet. He didn't want to hurt her, for he knew he had even if she didn't want to show it. Evan had talked to him about their kiss and his friend had made him realise that Narcissa could fall for him, really fall for him and that was something he wanted to prevent. He didn't want Narcissa to love him because he believed with all his heart that he could never love her in the way that she needed him too.
He and his mother had always had a special bond, she had always been there for him and was suddenly snatched away when rivals of his father had broken into the manor one night. His mother had died in the duelling, he had watched it happen. Lucius never understood why those people had attacked them at their family home but from the moment his mother had died and the attackers had left, his father had taught him one valuable lesson.
Abraxas had cradled his dead wife in his arms, howling like a werewolf at the pain he had felt at the loss of his beloved wife. Lucius had come to comfort his father but he had been shoved away. From that moment on, Lucius had been told that the attackers knew what his father's weakness was; Evelyn. And now Abraxas had taught Lucius to never love someone, for there would come a day for him that someone would want to find out his weakness.
Since then, Lucius had taken his father's words to heart. He didn't want to love someone as much as his parents had loved eachother, he didn't want to go through the pain that he had witnessed his father feel. He didn't want to put someone he loved in the position of being used to target him. And although he could admit to himself that he had feelings for Narcissa, he wanted her to believe otherwise. He would never put Narcissa in the position that his mother had been in.
