Kirgiri's POV
As I'm trying to process what's happening, I pull away from him, and he doesn't seem surprised. "What the hell..." I say, not angrily, but not happily either. "I'm sorry... that was wrong..." he replies with pity. "I-it was wr-wrong. I, uh, have to go. Bye, Makoto." I stutter, before running inside. I fall down on the couch, and dig my head into the pillow. That... didn't feel bad. It caught me off guard, but I didn't mind it. Why am I like this...
For the rest of the afternoon, I was thinking. Did I enjoy that? Why did he do it? Do I like-like him? What pushed me to do that? Suddenly, I get a message. I check my phone.
Naegi: Hey... I'm sorry about before... that was wrong, and sudden.
It was. Was it wrong? Or was it right? It certainly sent me into this deep state of thought.
So I type into the message bar...
'Thank you for doing that... I've been thinking about it all afternoon.'
No, that sounds weird.
'I thought about it... I think I like you too...'
No, that's too head on.
Then I think of the perfect thing to say. It took me a while to build up the courage to say it, but I've come to my decision.
Keep in mind the loneliness of the past years, how long it's been since I could cry into someone's chest and tell them all my troubles. Maybe I'm doing myself a favour. I could handle the loneliness. Until I met Naegi, I felt like... I needed someone. I felt like...
I needed him.
Kirigiri: No, it was right. I feel less lonely. Thank you, Makoto.
I had also called him 'Makoto' twice, when I said goodbye, and just then. I hope he doesn't get mad at it.
Naegi: Do you wanna, talk about it?
Kirigiri: It's more of an in person kind of thing.
Naegi: I can drive back to your place, I'm only a couple blocks down.
Kirigiri: No, my place is a mess.
Naegi: We can just talk outside?
Kirigiri: No, it doesn't matter.
Naegi: It matters to me.
"It matters to me."
Those words hung around in my head. Why does he care? All I have been is rude to him, and ignored him, and he cares?
Kirigiri: Please, forget it.
I respond, and don't reply to him again. I feel tears yet again welling up in my eyes. I need someone to talk to, someone like Makoto. But that would be pathetic. Nobody understands me anyway.
Why? I have never had issues with this, but ever since that kiss, I have been thinking about it more than I have for the past 5 years. Maybe if I try to sleep it off. I close my eyes, on the couch.
DREAM
"It matters to me."
It matters to him, Kyoko. He cares about you. He wants to help you.
I feel his lips on mine... body's touching. The feeling I felt before, replicated. I feel... not lonely. I feel safe. I feel like he wants to be there for me. He... he loves me.
Suddenly, he is gone. It goes dark, and the loneliness comes back fast. I remember everything, my parents, the fire, my hands. It all comes back to me in a stack of horrific flashbacks I didn't want to ever imagine again. I feel... isolated. Nobody talks to me, so I don't talk to them. But then, I meet Makoto again... and it all happens again.
The kiss in the car happens again, this time, I go with it. This feels better than the 3 seconds we had before.
*knock knock*
DREAM ENDS
I'm woken up by a knock on the door. Looking at my phone, I see the time. I was asleep for about 2 hours. Getting up, I go to the door. "Who is it?" I say, with no expression whatsoever.
"It's me..." says Naegi, with a hint of sorrow in his voice.
"W-what are you d-doing here?" I stutter. That dream I just had. I wanted it to go longer. "I'm here to talk to you, of course." he responds. "I'm... working." I lied. He doesn't have to know I was dreaming... about him.
"Well, can you take a break? I'm here to listen." he explains.
I think. If I open this door, all my loneliness could go away. That dream might just become a reality.
Do I want to just throw that away?
Why, in case I get embarrassed? Would I rather spend the rest of my days alone, and end up dying with no friends, no family, or no love, or would I rather get embarrassed this one time, and live a perfectly normal life?
I'm done hiding. I'm done being lonely.
"One second..."
I unlock my door, and open it slightly. There I see Makoto, his trademark smile. Part of me just wants to throw myself onto him and start crying, but I resist. "Y-you can c-come in... I'm sure it's c-cold outside..." I stuttered, probably making me look foolish. "Are you sure you want me to come in?" he asked. "Yes, I don't really mind." I say, finally getting myself together. Partially. I open the door so he can fit inside it, and he comes in. After closing the door, I invite him to sit down. "Would you like a c-coffee?" I ask. "Are you nervous to talk to me?" he asks, noticing my obvious stutter. "No... the cold must have come in when I opened the d-door." I lie. Of course, I was nervous to speak to him. "The only thing I want is for you to come talk to me." he says, sounding 100% serious. I go sit down on the seat across from him. "Tell me... why are you lonely." he asks. "Don't try cover it up, you said it in your text. I was getting really worried about you." I feel a blush come across my face. I try to play it off as if the room is hot, but then I remember a couple of seconds ago I lied about it being cold. "Where do I start?" I ask. "The beginning." he said.
I start explaining certain bits of my past. I explain about my parents. "My mother died when I was 9. She died in a fire, and when I tried to save her... well, let's just say that's why I wear gloves. My father went overseas for a case, and never came back. I had to live with an uncle I didn't know, and he was an alcoholic and he was abusive. After a year, I got tired of it, and I ran away. I ran throughout the city, concerned citizens would ask me what the matter was, and I asked them to take me to the police station. I wanted to find my dad, and live with him, and be somewhat happy. At this point I was 13. Once I got to the police station, I asked about Jin Kirigiri. The officer at the desk cringed at the name, and told me that he had died last year. At that moment, I had shattered. Any hope of happiness, gone in an instant. The officers asked me what was wrong, I told them about my uncle. He was arrested, but I still felt... despair. The officers had a will from my father. He had given me, his only child and close family member left, all of his earnings from his years in the force. I've been living alone ever since." I explained. "I hadn't really been feeling very lonely until..."
"Until what?" he asked.
"Until I met you. I realized... I needed someone. You were trying to be nice to me... that surprised me, since the last person who tried to be nice to me was that police man. It reminded me of my past, and how lonely I was. It was slowly driving me insane. You always seemed to pick the odd people, Makoto. Nobody respected Ibuki nor Kaito, but you became best friends with them in the first week.
You also picked me..."
At this point, I was crying. I was having a breakdown. It felt relieving though finally telling someone. I looked into my lap. I then felt a touch on my back. "I'm so sorry, Kyoko. I feel so guilty, the fact I kept looking and staring, asking who you were, asking about your gloves. That was rude of me. But now that you've told me... I respect you a lot more than I already did. You're incredibly brave." he said. As I kept crying, he sat down next to me on the couch. His arm is around me, it feels, warm, safe... I don't feel lonely...
"Makoto... do you think we can... try it again?" I asked, nervously.
"Try what again?" he responded.
"This..." I whispered, as my lips met his. As I did this, I felt my cares evaporate.
All I needed was him... and he was right in front of me.
A/N Oh my. This is probably the best chapter I have written so far. It was exciting to write, and it finally reached the point everyone wanted. I'm probably gonna upload another chapter in a bit, I wanna continue this. It's sooo good (in my opinion).
Also, I have been reading quite a bit of fanfiction lately, not just Naegiri. Some new ships Ima throw in somewhere:
Kaito x Maki
Shuichi x Kokichi (yes I ship it I think it's cute).
How I choose to implement these is up to... me lmao
Anyway, hope you enjoyed, comment your thoughts, bye!
