Sorry that I'm posting only right now, I had some trouble at home and at work.

Vegasman59: thanks for the reviews :)

luv-my-pug-roni2010 : Thank you so much, I hope you like this chapter :)

keepdreaming0031: Thank you so much! You're nice :)

Sarah-rose76646 : In this new chapter I planned to mention Pansy and Gardenia's nanny and to introduce her in the next one (which is nearly finished), because obviously her parent's don't take care of her and I don't see house elves doing that either (I don't know if there is any indication in the books about house elves 'raising' pure-blood's children but it's just my opinion that they wouldn't). I should have maybe introduced this character sooner, it definitely is a mistake from my part :/. Some five year old can read and write (I worked with some children who could). Reading and writing doesn't have an assigned aged. For Gardenia, I'm not sure if you noticed but even when she speaks I tried to use high society words (which I'm not sure if I managed to do since English isn't my first language) because even if her parents think she isn't worth it she's still from a pure blood family which means that they all talk with haughtiness and big words even in front of kids, I mean I just can't imagine a little Draco Malfoy going around and talking like all little kids XD I just see a baby talking like his Louis 14 and throwing hissy fits everywhere he goes because he didn't have the toy he wanted XD. I'm not sure if I answered your question, I tend to ramble a lot sorry! I don't think that Gardenia could read (or write) a whole letter by herself that's why I introduced in this chapter Miss Flora their nanny, who I actually should have introduced sooner but the inspiration for her character only came when I was writing the chapter 10 because I had the same questions as you. I hope I didn't go off topic, that I answered your question, and that my rumbling didn't put you off :)

I don't own anything.


Chapter 11: Apologize

"Wishing I could hear your voice again

Knowing that I never would

Dreaming of you won't help me to do

All that you dreamed I could

Passing bells and sculpted angels

Cold and monumental

Seem for you the wrong companions

You were warm and gentle »

Wishing you were somehow here again- From The Phantom Of The Opera

Waking up was the hardest part of my day. I looked around, trying to see if any of the girls were there. They were all sleeping peacefully under their heavy blankets. I sighed appreciatively, standing up. Last night had gone surprisingly smoothly and our little arrangement would definitely make my life easier. I took my toiletries and my clothes and went into the bathroom in order to get ready for my first day back at Hogwarts. This morning was going to be long. I had History of Magic first with those idiots -I mean those Gryffindors- and then Charms with Ravenclaws. Hopefully those two classes would pass quickly, I didn't fancy spending an entire morning surrounded by bumbling idiots. An hour and a half with Gryffindors was surely going to lower my mood… Just thinking about it makes me want to throw myself out of the Astronomy tower

Once I had completed my morning routine I descended into the common room, intending to go have breakfast. Unfortunately for me, my plan was delayed by a blond boy sited into an armchair, right in front of the chimney.

"You changed." Draco Malfoy told me, looking disdainfully at me.

"And that's coming from the boy who's going out with a Weasel." I sarcastically replied, rolling my eyes, choosing not to dwell on the fact that he was talking to me and not avoiding me like he was doing before the holidays.

He didn't say anything and chose to look at me intently instead. It was like he was looking for something. A hint of hurt? Nervousness maybe? Love?…

"What do you want exactly Draco? We already had that conversation." I told him, feeling more and more nervous under his gaze.

"I'm supposed to apologize." He replied harshly, standing up from his seat and passing right in front of me.

"You had a talk with Granger or something?" I laughed in disbelief, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

He didn't reply and kept on walking until he was out of the common room, leaving me with a few questions.

"That went well." I muttered to myself, shaking my head making my brown hair bounce a bit.

I huffed slightly and followed him out. Maybe I should ask Granger what this was all about. It wasn't as if I had never talked to her anyway.

Anyway, my little encounter with him wasn't going to change my mood. This day was going to be a nice day and that was all. No Malfoy or Greengrass were going to change that.

Once in the great hall, I went to take the same seat as yesterday and ate quickly, looking around to see if Granger was there. I wanted that talk before classes and I had thirty minutes to seek her out. My breakfast finished I stood up quickly, sending a brief nod to a tired looking Blaise and went in search of the Gryffindor girl. Malfoy's apologies- if we could call them like that- were obviously absolutely surprising. First because a Malfoy never apologizes and second he would never apologize to me. The only people who would ask him to apologize to me would be Blaise and Hermione but they surely wouldn't want to do it. I mean, Blaise wouldn't want to because he's not really on talking terms with the blonde idiot, but Hermione couldn't because Malfoy would never listen to her… I sighed, my thoughts were all over the place, maybe Granger would help me make sense of everything.

When I finally found her it was in front of our History of Magic classroom. She was lining next to the door, an open book in her hands as always. I looked around a bit and approached her.

"Classes begin in approximately twenty minutes." I started, softly, as to not attract any unwanted attention from the student who were also in the corridor.

"I know." She replied, tonelessly.

"Can I talk to you?" I whispered, looking around to see if anyone was looking at us.

She nodded, jaw clenched and we went into an empty classroom a few minutes away from ours.

"Malfoy came to talk to me this morning." I told her once I had closed the door and approached her, a look of disgust painted across my face.

"Isn't that good?" She asked, confused, sitting on a chair in the first row.

"He came to apologize." I answered flatly.

"I still don't see the problem in all of this." She answered, swallowing, pushing her hair out of her face.

I rolled my eyes and huffed. "He looked like he wanted to kill me." I continued, still looking at her intently, waiting for a reaction.

She sighed, and wriggled in her seat, looking uncomfortable. "Ginny asked him to go apologize to you because she wanted to mend our friendship." She finally told me, turning her head toward the window while biting her lips before looking back at me.

Weasley? I hadn't thought about that. I nodded anyway, face blank, urging her to go along. I didn't have all day after all. "So are you two friends again?" I asked when she didn't talk again.

It was her turn to nod. "I'm sorry if you feel kind of used." She whispered looking at me for the first time. "I know this is…"

"I don't care." I interrupted her. "It's good for the both of you I guess. Just try to keep him away from me." I told her, turning around with the intent of getting to class. I stopped suddenly and swallowed. "Apologize shouldn't be forced." I snapped, closing my eyes at the stupidity of my statement.

"All of this hurt you greatly." She whispered.

"We have to go to class." I answered through greeted teeth. Hurt or not it wasn't her business. I didn't need pity.

"I'm sorry." I heard her say while I kept on moving toward the exit.

I didn't reply and went out of the door and toward our history of magic classroom. She could play the friend all she wanted, I didn't care.

There wasn't a lot of students in the classroom. Most of them had dropped the subject after taking their OWLS, judging this subject to be boring and unnecessary. It didn't stop the classroom to be 'divided' in two though. On the left were the Slytherins and on the right the Gryffindors. Even after the war the hate was still there and as prominent as ever.

I sat down in the second raw on the left side of the classroom. I took a parchment as well as my quill and some ink out of my bag and proceeded to wait for Binns to walk through the wall and start talking.

"In 1689 the Statute of Secrecy was signed by most wizards' country in order to hide the wizards from the muggles and thus stop the burning of witches." The ghost suddenly appeared, already rumbling on and on about the wizard seclusion of 1689.

During the next hour and a half, I busied myself and took notes, forcing myself to forget about the talk I had with Draco and in consequence the one with Granger. Why people couldn't leave me alone was incomprehensible. Didn't I suffer enough? Sure I was a real bitch before (and now too) and I did some things which I'm not proud of (and some which I am) but it doesn't mean that I don't have a heart. I'm still a human being for Merlin's sake. Why the hell that Weasley girl thought apologizing to me would mend her friendship with Granger? Sure the stuck up know-it-all had defended me but why the hell that would put an end on their friendship? They were supposed to be the best of friends and surely something like that wouldn't put an end on a friendship… Unless they weren't really friends to begin with… Ah Potter might have come in between those two idiots! Funny…. Potter attracting girls…. Ah! What a funny concept!

"For next class I want a foot of parchment on the consequences of the wizard seclusion after the signature of the Statute of Secrecy in 1689." Binns concluded is long monologue.

I sighed, here goes my evening I thought. I needed to go to the library to get the books I needed in order to get this thing done tonight.

I went out of the door and went directly to Charms, I didn't want to see any of my so called classmates. Idiots, I whispered passing a group of giggling second year.

"Pansy." Granger whispered, trying hard not to attract attention. "May we talk tonight please?"

What did she want now? "I think I asked you everything I wanted too." I replied, as if it was obvious.

"Please." She stressed, turning toward me a bit while still walking.

"9, the empty classroom in the first floor." I finally relented.

She nodded and kept on walking quickly toward whatever class she had next. What she had to tell me had better be important.

I shook my head and huffed, stopping next to my Charms class's door. Please, no more homework, I thought watching the teacher open the door leading us inside.


After my last class of the day, which was Ghoul Studies, I went to the library. Every class had given a foot or so of homework to do for the next classes and I really had to begin to do them right now if I wanted to keep up. This year had been the hardest since I started Hogwarts. Homework came from left and right, giving us little time to spend on anything but them. Hogsmeade's weekends were most welcome now and were a great stress reliever.

Once in the library I went to the farthest table which was buried deep within bookcases and thousands of books. I sat my things on the table and went to search for books which would hopefully help me for my work. Once I had everything I went back to my table and decided to start with the easiest subject which was Ghoul Studies. I still didn't understand why I had taken the subject but it was the easiest thing I've ever had.

Thankfully, it took me less than an hour to finish and I promptly got started on my History of Magic essay.

I was halfway through the second book when I saw someone look intently at the shelves were History of Magic books were stored.

"Where is it?" I heard a voice whisper, looking at the books. Apparently Longbottom had decided to start his essay today too.

I sighed and stood up quickly, walking toward him. I was beginning to be too nice for my own good.

"Here." I said, handing one of the books I had previously taken to Longbottom. "I had finished anyway."

He nodded, not really knowing what to say.

"Well, goodbye." I finished the conversation. Either he was dumb or his ears were not functioning properly. I rolled my eyes at my thoughts and scurried back to my table.

Once 8 rolled around I decided to give myself a break and to go to dinner. I would then go to see Granger.

When 9 finally arrived, I entered the classroom on the first floor. Granger was already there, sitting on one of the chairs of the first row. I closed the door and lined on it.

"So, what is it you wanted to talk about?"

"I think they're in love." She told me quietly.

I laughed cruelly. "Thanks for the information." I glared and turned around putting my hand on the handle.

"There was a time when I thought Ginny was only doing that to defy her parents…"

"But it isn't that, right? Why are you telling me this anyway? It is not my business anymore." Didn't I suffer enough?

"Love is complicated but you shouldn't put other people to the side like he did to you."

"This has nothing to do with you." I replied harshly, while taking a few steps toward her.

"Well sorry if I'd like to think that you have enough humanity to be hurt by what he did." She exclaimed.

I scoffed. "Are you serious?" I marched toward her. "Are you fucking serious? What about him? Does he have enough humanity to be guilty over what he did? I don't think so. He didn't look that guilty to me this morning. And even if I was hurt what the hell does it have to do with you?" I slapped my hand on her table, eyes blazing with a fire I didn't know I possessed. Hurt and anger swirling inside me, confusing themselves and me. "He made his choice clear, he already hurt me, there's nothing more to add to the story."

"We all need someone to talk to." She whispered, leaning back and looking at me with tearful eyes.

"And what? You think that to me that someone would be you?" I laughed in disbelief.

"If you wanted to. I know heartbreak…"

"Oh please! That story with Potter is getting old." I scoffed rolling my eyes.

"There are different types of heartbreak." She told me softly. "You can be hurt because someone publically humiliated you as well as stumped on your heart and shattered it in the process." I scoffed but she didn't spare me a glance. "You can be hurt over being in love with your oblivious best friend who already has a girlfriend. You can be hurt because your best friends are ignoring you and think you're some type of snotty know-it-all. You can be hurt because you're alone and you know that even your closest friends don't understand you. You can be hurt because you don't have anyone anymore…" Her voice cracked at the end.

"You have Potter and Weasley." I told her my voice getting softer when I saw the haunted look in her eyes.

"Yes, but they aren't the people who keep me awake at night, wishing they were here to see me, hug me, talk to me…" She trailed, a few tears spilling which she quickly wiped off, putting her head in her hands.

I was out of words. The girl who I hated since forever just confided in me. What was I supposed to say? Poor you? I'm sorry? It will be okay? All of those sounded crazy and unemotional.

"You know, people are wrong. It won't get better with time it will just get bearable." She looked at me with her chocolate eyes filled with tears but also a certain strength. "You just have to live with it and try to go on without losing your mind." She continued, shrugging. It was obvious she was on the verge of a break down.

"You're doing a good job." I tried, looking around briefly.

She smiled slightly, teary eyed. "I'm a good pretender." She whispered softly.

"I am too." I nodded, swallowing and looking down.

"We can pretend together then." She softly replied.

"We could." I replied immediately.

She cocked her head to the side, furrowing her brow slowly and then sent me a small smile once she understood the meaning behind my words.

"We should go back to our dormitories."

She nodded but made no move to stand up. "I'm going to wait a bit, try to regain some composure." She answered my unasked question.

"Okay." I whispered. "Being strong is good but you have friends and why would they be here if it wasn't to be there for you during your hard times?" I asked her, trying to smile slightly. "Good night." I told her, before I went out the door.

Once I had closed the door, I lined on it slightly, closing my eyes. Granger was definitely something. I sighed, trying to shake off the sadness I felt for the girl I hated…. The girl I used to hate?


Hello Pansy,

I miss you a lot. Mr Bunny and I would like to know if we could go into your room to play? I hope it doesn't boter you. Flora says hi.

How is Hogwarts? I hope you are well. I love you.

Gardenia


My dearest Gardenia

I miss you too. I hope Mr Bunny is behaving or else no more tea for him. You can go in my room when you want love, at least one of us will use it.

Hogwarts is alright but it lacks something and it is you. Anyway, I had my first homework given to me today and I handed the one I did with you. Hopefully the professors will find them to their liking.

I love you, take care of you.

Pansy

PS: bother and not boter; Flora, thank you.


I hope you liked it. Sorry for the mistakes.