FIRST KISS

When James called to talk to me, I was nervous.

I was sure by now Jennifer would have told everybody.

Rose and Scorp gave me comforting smiles as I left the Gryffindor table to the entrance hall.

Jennifer had plenty of reasons to do this to me, in her mind I'd taken her boyfriend, not set her up with my cousin and made her look like a fool.

I played with the ends of my t-shirt and biting my lip.

I saw James leaning against the wall looking at the clouds in the sky.

I asked in a small voice "James?"

He turned, and I looked away, hoping to run away.

He asked "So…."

I cut him off and said in a ramble "I'm so sorry, it's true, everything she said is true. I was just thirteen and it isn't my fault that I had a tiny crush on you! I didn't mean to cause any problems, just sneaked in one night and watched you sleep! Oh god I sound stupid, sorry for making things tough, if you don't want to talk to me then it's fine….."

He grabbed my shoulders "Sahana stop! I was going to ask you if you could take chaser try-outs today? I was going to go over quidditch tactics!"

He looked very surprised.

I bit my lip, so if he didn't know before, he knew now.

In the end, I was the one who ratted out about myself to James, lovely.

He ran a hand through his hair "But this is…..surprising, do you still like me?"

I said forcefully "NO!"

He gave a relieved sigh "Okay, great. What you did is a little disturbing but I don't think you should be embarrassed now. Just don't do it again"

I nodded.

He said "After all, can I blame you? I'm so hot and irresistible"

I rolled my eyes.

He told me "You're taking chaser try-outs and make sure you pick the best"

I nodded "Okay, captain!"

He smiled.

He asked "So what made you spill the beans now?"

I shuffled my feet "Your brother told Jennifer and Jennifer threatened to tell everybody because I refused to set her up with my cousin"

He put an arm around my shoulder "I'm surprised you trusted Al"

I told him "I don't, he saw me sneaking out of your dorm and figured it out, I'm impressed he didn't tell you till now"

James gave a small smile "You underestimate him, Al might be a twat sometimes…"

"Sometimes? Excuse me, but I beg to differ!"

James rolled his eyes "My point is, he's pretty nice once you get to know him"

I scoffed "Shut up, Potter doesn't have an ounce of nice in him"

As we walk down the steps to the lake he said "You've only seen his annoying side because you annoy him too. Maybe you both should think about acting your own age"

I took that as an offense.

I shoved him "Your brother, is the childish one! He's hated me all his life!"

James smiled "I don't think so, I know from experience that if Al hates someone he'll not even make an effort to annoy them, I've seen his hatred and it's not at all like this"

That surprised, I knew Potter could hold a grudge and had a temper, but this was new.

James patted my shoulder "I'm just saying, try being nice to him and you might see a change"

He pulled me into a hug "I think you just have to let some things go now, especially the grudge you have against my brother"

Just then a loud voice yelled "Get away from her you idiot! She's mine!"

Potter collided with James and pushed him off me.

James groaned and stood up as Potter took a stance in front of me.

James shook his head "Bye, I'm going"

Then he left.

Potter turned to me "Did he hurt you?"

He sounded genuinely worried.

I rolled my eyes, I started walking to the castle.

Could I be nicer to Potter?

I turned around to see him hold up a bunch of red roses.

He told me "For you, for last night, I shouldn't have chased you"

When I looked into his eyes, I saw that at heart Potter was still a kid.

I gave a small smile "It's okay"

I accepted the flowers, then said "Um…just for your information, I'm more of a Lily and Jasmine fan, but white roses are fine too"

His eyes lit up and he hugged me "I'll get you hundreds"

I was too shocked to react.

He let me go and then tugged me by the hand to the castle "It might rain, we don't want to get wet in the rain"

It felt really weird, entering the castle hand in hand with Potter with bunch of red roses in my hands.

I immediately let go of his hand and he looked disappointed.

I said "Thanks, but I have a lot to do so, bye Potter"

I ran up the steps to my dorm.

My heart was pounding as I sat on my bed.

Could I be nice to Potter?

I remember Samira telling me, the only way to destroy hatred is by being nice to the thing that you hate.

That was how she got rid of her hatred for dogs.

Now, she had a puppy.

Maybe I should have reconsidered my ways of dealing with Potter.

As I laced up my Quidditch boots, I made up my mind, I Sahana Sharma was going to be a teeny-weeny bit nice to Potter, however annoying he got.

When I saw the people on the pitch for try-outs, I sighed.

Every year we had a bunch of giggly girls who came to see Al, Scorp, James and Fred. Lily and I were the only two chasers.

James called "Shut up and divide into groups according to your years"

They all shuffled hapazhardly.

Some faces were familiar.

Once they had divided themselves, James continued "Okay, listen up! This year, Sahana here will be taking your try-outs, clear?"

They all mumbled their understanding.

James motioned for me to say something "Right, I want to see how you lot fly, so….First years up in the air!"

The first years weren't that bad although their nervousness got the best of them.

The second-years were slightly better but just too showy.

The third years were decent, particularly one boy stood out.

The fourth years were filled with determined but sloppy girls.

The fifth years were impressive.

The sixth years weren't so impressive except for one boy.

The seventh years were all good and there were only three of them.

Towards the end it was a competition between, Selina Emerson, Jade Hewbeck and Brady Mclaggen.

Brady Mclaggen was in our year and was quiet and shy.

He was lanky and freckle-faced.

But he got every single shot past James and I ticked his name for chaser.

Once the try-outs were done, James was happy with my choice.

As we walked to the changing rooms, I walked with Mclaggen "You were really good out there"

He looked up and offered me a small smile "umm…thanks"

I smiled "I'm sure we'll get the cup this year"

He nodded not saying anything.

Potter bobbed over and asked "Sahana, I'm hungry, let's go for lunch?"

It took all my energy not to reprimand him for being rude.

I said carelessly "I'll be there, you head over to the great hall"

By the time I'd turned back to talk to Mclaggen, he'd gone into the changing rooms.

He was always like that, a total introvert.

I sighed and changed.

When I was leaving, I gave him a small wave and he smiled.

I felt good, I always felt like people should have made more of an effort to talk to him.

As I walked to the castle, Potter's voice reached me and his hand creeped around my waist.

I immediately pushed him into the bushes.

It was quite hilarious if I say so myself.

He tripped sideways over the bushes and cursed "Shit!"

I laughed shamelessly.

He slowly got up and dusted himself off, I saw the scratch on his arm.

I rushed to him "I'm terribly sorry!"

I looked at his arm.

But, the sneak had other plans.

He lifted me up in swift motion and I was slung over his shoulder in no time.

I squealed "Potter! What is the meaning of this?"

He walked and I bounced up and down.

I whacked him and kicked, but the boy was strong.

I screamed "HELP!" as he threw me down into the lake.

I splashed into the water and came out coughing and spluttering.

I wiped my matted hair from my face and glared at Potter standing there grinning, pleased with himself.

I stretched my hand out.

He took it thinking he had to help me out.

Instead I gave a great tug and pulled him in.

Yeah people! I'm stronger than you think!

Potter seemed surprised when he stood in the water dripping.

I don't know how it was possible, but Potter looked good.

His shirt was almost transparent and his green eyes shined.

Don't make a sarcastic mark or get any ideas, nothing happened.

Except for the fact that, I felt like I could stand there forever.

He waded through the water towards me and kissed me.

My eyes stayed open and I pounded against his chest but he was persistent.

But after two or three more seconds my eyes shut on their own accord and I forgot that this was the boy I had hated for so long.

My hands were pressed to his chest and I could feel the world slip away.

I could have lost myself in him.

Luckily for me, I was able to think somewhat rationally and I managed to extricate myself from him.

He looked like he was somewhere far away from the earth.

I bit my lip and then got out of the lake.

Potter followed me.

That afternoon I skipped lunch and sat in the common room.

For the second time in the day, I had taken a shower.

I was finishing an essay when someone sat down in the seat beside mine.

I looked up and was surprised to find Mclaggen there.

He asked "Why didn't you come down for lunch?"

I smiled "Didn't feel like it"

He said "What you've written is wrong"

He pointed at my essay.

I groaned "I hate Potions"

He took the essay and corrected certain things here and there, then told me "I love it"

I smiled "That's nice"

He asked me "You enjoy reading don't you?"

I nodded "Yes I do"

He told me "I think you should work for the daily prophet when you grow up"

In fact, it wasn't a bad idea. But I felt that Daily Prophet was more sensational than factual.

I smiled "I'll think about it"

He nodded and started working on his own essay.

We sat like that in silence.

I doodled on a piece of spare parchment.

I hated Potter, after that kiss how the hell was I going to look at him without feeling regret.

I felt confused.

The worst part was, that after the Armotentia wore off, he'd be back to normal and I didn't think I'd be normal again after that kiss from hell.

Heaven was playing games with me.

I shouldn't have kissed him back, that was where it went wrong.

But I'm a hormonal teenager who had never had a boyfriend. What do you expect me to do when a hot boy dripping in water comes at me?

I should have died, that would have been so much better.

Just then Rose yelled "Sahana!"

I responded tiredly "What Rose?"

She pulled me up by the arm and took me to the couch "Slughorn told me to tell you, the stock of Armotentia antidote he ordered has arrived!"

She looked very happy, I breathed a sigh of relief "Yes, now Potter'll finally be off my back!"

I couldn't help but think about the kiss though.

I asked "Where is Potter?"

She stood up "Already at Slughorn's office with Scorpius! Come on!"

She pulled me up.

We raced to Slughorn's office.

I knocked on the door, Slughorn opened the door "Ms. Sharma, just in time, come in, please. You too Ms. Weasley"

We smiled.

Potter was sitting there with a confused look on his face, but brightened when he saw me"

Slughorn said "Since we are all here let's have something to drink shall we?"

He brought out five glasses, which he filled with butter beer.

The he did something to one glass which he handed to Potter.

We all sipped keeping our eyes on Potter.

He drank it.

I watched as his expression changed and the glazed look in his eyes was gone.

He looked up and asked "Why are you all looking at me?"

We all looked away quickly.

We drank in silence and bid goodbye to Professor Slughorn after a polite Thanks.

Once we were out, Scorp and Rose said "Um…we both have to go to the library, we'll see you later"

She dragged a confused Scorpius off.

Potter and I walked in silence, then he stated "I remember some of the things I did"

I blushed "Oh"

He asked "Did I make things awkward?"

I nodded, unable to say anything.

I was more fascinated with the ground than I'd ever been before.

Potter yelled "Watch it!"

He pulled me aside before I crashed into a suit of armour.

He looked at me and me at him.

My breath hitched.

He let me go.

He told me shuffling from foot to foot "What happened….the kiss…..it..it didn't mean a thing right?"

My heart plummeted, and I didn't even know why.

I felt my head bob up and down, I felt completely numb.

He looked relieved "Oh good, anyway, I'll go now"

That was it, he left.

I stood there and unknowingly a tear slipped down my cheek.

My first ever kiss wasn't even real, it was just like he said, it didn't mean a thing.

Maybe not to him, he'd kissed a hundred girls before, me?

No. How would I feel knowing that my first kiss was just pathetic, everything about it was pathetic.

It was with the boy I hated who was under the effect of Armotentia.

It wasn't fair, why did I feel something was I so desperate?

That evening I took all the petals of the roses and the stems and threw it off the astronomy tower.

Surprisingly there had been a note attached to the bouquet.

Which I hadn't seen before.

I read it,

Dear Sahana,

I'm sorry for last night, I just needed to see you. You mean everything to me.

I know you hate me, but please give me a chance.

Just a chance to prove how much I love you.

Yours forever

Pott-head

I was completely gob-smacked. But I collected myself and threw that down as well.

I saw it getting caught in the wind.

This was reality, I hated Potter and he hated me.

My life sucks.


SAHANA POV:

"'Cause trying not to love you, only goes so far
And trying not to need you, is tearing me apart
Can't see the silver lining, from down here on the floor
And I just keep on trying, but I don't know what for
'Cause trying not to love you
Only makes me love you more
Only makes me love you more"

ALBUS POV:

"So if you go
You should know
It's hard to just forget the past so fast
It was good, it was bad but it was real
And that's all you get in the end of the matter

Here's how it goes
All it takes is some trying
You can run, you can hide
But you can't escape my love"


AN: Well, well, well, I didn't see that coming.

PLEASE REVIEW!

I need to know what you think!

Thanks for reading!

SPHP20896:)