Finally I've finished this chapter - and it's not quite 7,000 words...Sorry. But it's still a bit longer than the others (probably only by a few hundred words lol). Anyway it's here now and I hope everyone enjoys it. I don't know when the next will be out as I'm getting ready to move away for school in a couple weeks, plus I unfortunately have a medical issue I need to take care of before school. So I have no idea when I'll have the time to write the next one. I want to keep updating as quickly as I've been, but I can't promise anything. I hope those who read this enjoy it and please, please, please leave reviews. Let me know what you're thinking, what you like, what you don't like, etc. Thanks :)

Chapter Eleven

Sunlight poured into Nicky's room waking Lorna from her slumber. Her brown eyes squint from how bright the sun is while she looks up to see that the redhead is still asleep. A smile spreads on her face as she takes in the beauty of her sleeping girlfriend; she gently lifts her head to press a loving kiss to her forehead. Lorna never imagined that she would ever be in love with a woman - she grew up as a catholic, and was taught that just the thought of loving someone in the same gender was a sin. To actually act on those feelings would definitely deem her to hell - if she really believed in that. Of course had her father found about this, he would most certainly shun her out of the family - if he hadn't already done that because of her mental condition.

"Mornin' kid," Nicky's raspy voice says as she opens her eyes to stare down at the petite brunette. She smiles softly, reaching her hand down to lovingly caress her face. Lifting Lorna's face in front of her own, she presses their lips together in a tender kiss. Her hands stroke the brunette's cheeks as she deepens the kiss, "God you have no fucking idea how much I love you." Nicky slowly runs her hands down Lorna's sides, making sure to leave her feeling tingly and warm inside.

Lorna wraps her arms tightly around the redhead's neck, kissing her warmly on the lips. She brushes her thumb tenderly across her girlfriend's cheek. "I love you, too," she whispers with a beaming smile, pressing another kiss to her lips. "You're the first and only woman I've felt this way about. And I wouldn't trade this feeling for anything, I don't care if I go to hell for it - you are worth it." Lorna cups the other's face in her hands, brushing her lips lovingly against her skin. No one has ever made her feel as wonderful as Nicky has.

Laughing at Lorna's comment about hell, Nicky softly looks into her eyes. She uses one of her hands to push a stray hair off of her face, "You're not gonna go to hell for loving someone, kid. But I am flattered that you would endure a torturous afterlife just to be with someone like me. That's so kind of you." She smirks playfully, pulling the brunette's face closer to hers and smashes their lips together in a deep kiss. She runs a finger through the short waves of her hair, twirling them into tiny curls. "We should go out tonight, what do you think?"

Nodding her head enthusiastically, the brunette smiles brightly. "That's a great idea," she presses her lips against Nicky's cheek in a gentle kiss, running a hand through her thick red curls. Her fingers lightly caress the taller woman's forehead as she stares warmly up at her, "You are absolutely beautiful, Nicky. Who wouldn't want to spend their life with you? I've never met a woman like you, and I am so happy that I finally have - I just, I love you so much and I can't see my life with anyone but you." She says gently, peering up at her with love very clearly showing in her eyes and she gently runs her finger against the other's jawline.

Nicky's eyes go soft as she looks lovingly down at Lorna. She pulls her closer, stroking her forehead while giving a warm kiss to her lips, "Lorna - Sweet, precious Lorna, I can assure you that you are the first person I've ever had such strong and real feelings for. I mean I've had girlfriends before, but none of them meant as much to me as you do. You're a special woman; you really are, kid." She kisses the top of her head, smiling lovingly at her. Hardly anyone's ever seen the good in Nicky, so knowing that Lorna does makes her heart swell with warmth.


After spending a lovely morning in bed with Lorna, Nicky happily stood in the kitchen to make a fresh pot of coffee. She smiles as she scoops the coffee grounds into the filter - she's never loved anyone the way she loves Lorna Morello. And the thought alone brings a warming sensation to her. It feels nice, to love and be loved. Once the pot begins to brew, she walks into the living room and sits on the couch while flicking the television on.

Her facial expression fills with concern when she sees Lorna come in the room, her skin pale as a ghost. Immediately Nicky stands up and wraps her in a tight hug. She cups her cheeks, staring worriedly into her eyes. "What's wrong, kid? Why do you look so pale? Are the voices bothering you?" Her voice uneasily thick as she runs her hand comfortingly through her girlfriend's dark hair.

Shaking her head furiously, Lorna holds up her phone shakily pointing at the recent call she received. "Christopher - he called me from - from jail. Told me he's getting out this Friday, and that he-he will find me and -" Tears spill out of her eyes as she begins to sob, not able to finish what she was saying because of how upset she is.

Furious, Nicky's face turns red. There's no chance in hell that she's letting Christopher come anywhere near Lorna again. She's going to find him and kill him. After what he's done to the two people that mean everything to her, he deserves to die. Her arms squeeze the brunette tighter, making her feel safe and protected. "You think I'm gonna let that dickhead anywhere near you, kid? Hell no. I'll find him and fucking shoot him myself. He's not coming near you, don't even worry about that. I promised you that I would take care of you and protect you, and I intend to keep that promise," she says firmly, kissing the top of her head soothingly.

"I don't - I don't understand," Lorna chokes out in between her sobs, "I thought leaving him alone is what he wanted? Why - why is he out to kill me? I stopped stalking him...Haven't I? Oh no - the voices, they must be telling him things. They're making stuff up and telling him to kill me! He was a good man, he wouldn't kill anyone. So it's gotta be the voices; it just has to." Her eyes bewildered as she grips tightly on Nicky's arm, peering heavily up at her.

The redhead lovingly stares back at her while shaking her head. She carefully leads her to the couch, sitting beside her and gently places Lorna's head on her shoulder. "No, kid, I don't think it's the voices. I think it's all Christopher - he's a fucking asshole," Nicky says, her voice soft but with a hint of anger as she uses her thumb to caress the bottom of her chin. "You're just a very sweet girl - you see the good in everyone. But there's no good in him, not after what he almost did to you! I can still see traces of his hand-prints on your neck - and that makes me unbelievably angry. How could he hurt such a precious woman like you - how could anyone?! You are just a tiny, sweet little thing - what could he possibly see in you that makes him want to fucking kill you? You stalked him, so what? It's not like you did anything to physically hurt him. You stalked him out of love; and you're not thinking clearly so you're not technically at fault for that. I'm telling ya, kid - if I ever come face to face with this Christopher, I will fucking beat him until he can't get up. I swear to God that I will - he's a fucking evil son of a bitch."

Lorna bows her head down, tears streaming down her cheeks as her body slightly trembles. "I-I - the-the night that-that you found me on the bridge - I had gone to his house, and Angela - she opened the door. I didn't - I didn't know that he had a fiancee and it made me so angry. And then she laughed in my face, telling me what a child I was - there's no way Christopher or anyone could love me. I got even angrier and pushed her to the floor with my arms practically choking her...But as soon as he came outside and I heard his voice, I stopped. I - I didn't mean to hurt her, but I was so mad that I couldn't comprehend what I was even doing. Oh God I'm horrible, I'm a monster," she cries, shaking tremendously as she holds onto the other for dear life.

To hear that only brings more rage to Nicky. She couldn't believe how cruel those two people were to Lorna. It made her want to find them and take them to that bridge - make them feel the pain that they caused the tiny brunette. Cupping her face, she looks warmly into her eyes. "I love you so much, kid," she gently whispers, kissing her softly, "No, baby, you're not a monster! She deserved that, Lorna. What she said to you is absolutely cruel; you had every right to do what you did. I'm very pleased to hear that you actually stood up for yourself - I didn't think you had it in you, you're too sweet of a person."


Later on in the day, Nicky and Lorna decided to head out for a while. They spent most of the past couple of days cooped up in the house so an afternoon out sounded perfect to them. While the redhead was busy driving, Lorna sat in the passenger side with the window rolled down and happily took in the sunlight. She loved the warm weather, it filled her with a sense of familiarity. Back when she was a little girl - before her mental condition completely engulfed her - she and Franny were very close. The two would play outside from morning until night, only going in when their mother yelled for them to. Summer nights, as a child, were always Lorna's favorite - she loved spending all the time outside with her sister and sometimes wished she could go back to those days. When everything was much simpler and her mind actually seemed to work properly.

Periodically staring over at her girlfriend Nicky couldn't help but smile. No one has ever made her fall in love before - no one except the petite brunette woman sitting beside her. That's not to say that she hadn't liked the several girlfriends that she did have, it's just they never made her feel the way Lorna does. None of them had ever made feel her so loved, at least not the kind of love that Lorna erupts within her. "Lorna," she gently says, a smile on her face as she watches the brunette turn to face her, "I love you."

Lorna beams a smile as she reaches her hand up to gently caress Nicky's cheek, "I love you too, so much." She grabs a hold of the other's free hand and lovingly strokes it with her thumb. Her smile grows; she never imagined that she could love someone this much - especially as that someone is another woman. "You make me so happy, Nicky. I'm so thankful that you were the one who found me on the bridge - you've helped me realize how much I still have to live for. I mean I may not have Christopher anymore or even my own family but I do have you - and you are worth everything." She softly brushes her lips against her girlfriend's knuckles.

"Damn you kid, why ya gotta get all sweet when I'm in the middle of driving?" A smirk playfully spreads on Nicky's face as she quickly glances over to Lorna. She takes the hand that holds hers and brings it to her own lips, kissing it warmly. "Since I can't kiss you properly, that'll have to do for now. My beautiful, sweet Lorna."


About fifteen minutes later, the two arrive at the bar and once they're both out of the car, Nicky pulls Lorna to her for a long awaited kiss. "That's better," the redhead says with a smirk once she releases her. She gently grabs her hand and the two make their way into the building. A hostess seats them at a booth, hands them each a menu, and leaves. Smiling across at Lorna, Nicky reaches over to gently stroke her cheek. "You gonna try a different alcoholic beverage tonight, kid? Or are you gonna play it safe and stick to your wine?" She lightly chuckles while staring at the other.

"Hey, I ain't afraid to try something else," Lorna's tone defensive as she crosses her arms while giving a lighthearted glare towards her girlfriend. "My mom used to mix whiskey and honey together - and it was very, very good. So I'll get that today." She states matter-of-factually, and does exactly that when a waitress comes to write down their orders.

Nicky stares at the brunette, scrunching her face up as she asks, "Whiskey and honey? Really? That can't seriously taste good." A mixture that she's never come across for the past five years that she's bar tended. She's surprised they even have the ingredients to make such a drink. The sound alone of it makes her want to gag. But she has to smile at how precious Lorna looks when she tries to act all tough.

After the drinks are brought over, Lorna holds up her glass and gently sniffs in the scent of it. The strong smell brings her back to a time where her life was almost decent - when her mother was alive, she and her sister got along, and her dad wasn't making jokes about her all the time. She sips it, and smiles, "Delightful. You don't know what're your missing, Nicky." She stares over at Nicky, who shakes her head with a laugh.

The redhead smirks as she takes a gulp of her own drink. She reaches across the table to move a stray hair from her girlfriend's eyes, "Whatever floats your boat, kid." A feeling of warmth rushes through Nicky's body - this is the happiest she's been in a long while. She has a woman in her life - that she truly loves and who loves her back - , her sister is doing much better, and she hasn't touched drugs in over three years. What more could she ask for?

Lorna beams at her, grabbing one of Nicky's hands and squeezing it gently in her own. The love she has for this woman - the first and only woman she could ever have such feelings for - is even deeper and stronger than what she thought she felt for Christopher. And to make her feel better about it, the redhead shares the same love - she loves Lorna back, something that she thought she would never get to experience. "Sometimes I wonder if you're actually real or if this is all part of my imagination. I never thought I would meet a person who I'd fall in love with and be loved back," she quietly says, looking over at her girlfriend.

Hearing that makes Nicky's heart break; lovingly she takes Lorna's head in her hands and kisses her softly on the lips, "I'm pretty sure I'm real, kid. And my love for you is definitely real too. I've never loved anyone the way I love you. You are so damn special, Lorna, you really are." She runs her thumb tenderly across the brunette's cheek, smiling kindly at her.

"I'm so glad that I met you," Lorna smiles, peering lovingly into the other's big brown eyes. She lifts her glass to take a sip before continuing to speak. "You are the first person to ever take interest in me - to still be here even when you know how fucking messed up my head is, and you don't mock me for that. You have no clue how much that means to me, Nicky. And on top of that being with you actually helps me to ignore the voices. You seem to make my head want to work better, if that makes any sense."

Nicky can feel her heart beating faster with the amount of love she has for this petite Italian woman. She shakes her head with a smile as her eyes go soft while staring across at her girlfriend. "That's cause those voices know I won't let them hurt you. I could never mock you, and it angers the hell out of me that your idiot father does. There is so much more to you than this mental condition - you're a beautiful woman who has the kindest heart, and you're very sweet. Have you talked to your family at all lately, kid? Do they ever call you to see how you're doing?" She curiously wonders - surely Lorna's family still cares about her, deep down. She's never met the woman's two older siblings or anything, but they can't be as cruel as her father, can they?

With a sour expression, Lorna shakes her head. She hasn't bothered talking to any of them since her last altercation with Franny. And it's not as if they tried to get in contact with her either - if they were going to defend their father's actions of constantly berating and belittling her, then she needed to stay away from them. "Aside from Miley, I haven't. I haven't called them and they haven't called me," she finally says, her eyes faintly feeling a bit watery. She quickly wipes away at them, not wanting to cry over it. It hurts to know that even Franny - her sister who she used to look up to, who used to take care of her - would mock her condition.

The slight pain in Lorna's eyes definitely didn't go unnoticed by Nicky. Softly, she looks into her eyes and slightly frowns. "That hurts you, doesn't it? I'm sorry, kid. You would think they would check up on you, for fuck's sake. What's wrong with them? How can they not care?" A twinge of anger quite evident in her voice as she lift her hand to comfortingly stroke Lorna's forehead. She couldn't fathom how one's own family could just up and abandon them, like Lorna's, and especially over a mental condition that she hadn't the ability to control.

Shrugging her shoulders, Lorna put on a smile - she didn't want to dwell on the negatives. Of course she was hurt and upset by how her family chose to shun her away, but she wasn't about to let that ruin their night out. "You don't gotta apologize, it's fine. It doesn't bother me that much anyway," she lies while gulping the rest of her whiskey. Her smile grows once the effects of the alcohol take over, and her body starts to relax. "How old were you when you realized you were into women rather than men?"

Smirking, Nicky gulps down the beer in front of her and stares straight ahead at her girlfriend. "Well that's random of you to ask, kid," she chuckles, "I think I've known that all my life. I never took an interest in boys or men. It was especially apparent to me when I was in middle school - all the girls were gushing over what guy was taking them to the dances while I couldn't give two shits about it." Middle school was one of the worst times for Nicky - she couldn't stand how ridiculous all the girls were in her class or how immature all the boys were. She wouldn't go back to that time if she was paid to. "What about you - when was the first time you realized you liked men?" The redhead sarcastically jokes as she lightly laughs.

"Very funny," Lorna says with a laugh of her own and before she can say anything else, the waitress comes over. She quickly orders another drink as does Nicky. "But I always did, from a very young age, fantasize about my wedding day. I pictured myself meeting Mr. Right in college - which never happened as I hadn't even gone - and we would fall in love instantly. Did you go to college or anything, Nicky? Do you have a dream job or something?" Once their drinks are brought over, she grabs hers and sips it while waiting to hear the other's response.

Nicky reached over to lovingly caress the brunette's cheek, giving her a warm peck on the lips. She lifts the beer bottle in front of her and chugs a bit of it down. "College wasn't really my thing; I'm not the studying type - not like my sister at all. Watching her study is good enough for me. As for a dream job - I don't know, I've never really thought that far ahead. I kind of like bar-tending; maybe one day I'll open a bar of my own. What about you, kid - what's your dream job?" She enjoys the light talk they're having - it's nice to see Lorna at ease and not occupied with the demons bothering her in her head. She only wishes there was a way to rid her of them for good.

Ever since she was a child Lorna dreamt of being a teacher. She loved children and as part of her senior project, in high school, chose to volunteer at a local daycare center. It was one of the best experiences she's ever had - she relished in seeing how much the children learned each week, and how they grew developmentally. And when her nephew, Julian, was born three years ago, that had been one of the best days of her life. "I always yearned to work with children - I'd love to be a preschool teacher, but I don't know if I could ever do such a thing now. I doubt parents would trust a woman with mental issues to teach their little ones," she says sadly, a defeated expression on her face.

To see the sadness in Lorna's brown eyes, it brings an overwhelming amount of empathy to Nicky. "Lorna, we're getting you help. And hopefully your therapist will figure out some sort of treatment that will keep your condition under control. Maybe tomorrow during your session with her, you can tell her about what you would like to do with your life and she might find a way to help you achieve that. You're not crazy, kid, and you would be an amazing teacher. We just need to get your mind to cooperate with what you want it to do, so that you don't have to worry about the voices anymore." She gently cups the brunette's head in her hands and brushes their lips gently together.


A few hours of drinking and many conversations later, both women were quite a bit lit. They were walking - rather Nicky walking and Lorna wobbling while leaning onto her - down the street to try and sober up before heading back home. In the midst of their walk, Lorna noticed a familiar figure that seemed to be coming towards them. As the figure grew closer, her face went pale. The figure turned out to be Angela, and she did not look happy.

Nicky felt Lorna's tugging on her and grew concerned. She wrapped her arms protectively around her, looking down at her with with worry, "What's the matter, kid?" When she sees who the petite woman is pointing at, she grits her teeth. The woman, who is now standing right in front of them, is tall with dark hair and a very unpleasant expression on her face. She assumes that this must be Angela which causes her to give a dark glare to her. "Excuse you, what the fuck are you doing blocking us from continuing our walk? Huh?" She growls angrily.

Ignoring the raging redhead completely, Angela glares right at Lorna. "You fucking bitch! You just can't leave Christopher the fuck alone, can you?! You're the one who belongs in prison not my fucking husband! And who's this with you, huh? You too weak to defend yourself? Or another a person you're stalking? You're a damn psycho, Lorna," she hisses, swinging her arm in an effort to punch her.

Fuming, Nicky blocks the other's fist from touching Lorna and shakes her head. She can't believe what she's hearing and has the urge to push that woman so hard that she falls and cracks her head in half. "Who the fucking hell are you to talk to Lorna like that?! Christopher certainly does belong in prison - he fucking broke into my apartment and tried to kill a sweet, precious woman. And not only that but he also injured my sister quite terribly. So he's right where he belongs, and it's a shame he's only there for a few days - he should be there a lot longer after the pain he caused Lorna. And you - you heartless little bitch - if you even lay a finger on her, I will fucking mess your face up. I mean it, I fucking will. You and Christopher are fucking assholes for patronizing this sweet woman - she's got a serious mental condition, she can't control what she does. You two broke her and made her feel so bad that I had to fucking stop her from jumping off a bridge in the middle of the fucking night. I would love to make you feel that way, you fucking shit. I hope karma comes back to you and makes your life a living hell because that's what you deserve." Her arms wrap even tighter around Lorna's body in a protective embrace while she glares darkly at the other woman. She flips her off as she continues walking down the street with her girlfriend.

They make it back to Nicky's car and she gently helps Lorna into it. She kneels beside her for a minute, noticing the slight amount of tears on her face and lovingly wipes them away. Sighing sadly, Nicky gives her a soft kiss on the head while pulling her in for another hug. "You're not a psycho, kid. You're so sweet and loving - that Angela is a complete cold-hearted bitch. I'd kill her if I could; she had no right to insult you like that. And don't you dare think that any of what she said is true - it's not," her voice warm and full of love as she tenderly strokes her forehead, "I love you, baby - I love you so much." She gently presses their lips together in a soft kiss before finally releasing her and getting into the driver's side to start the car.


That night as the two lay, snuggled up, in Nicky's bed, Lorna looks up at her and taps her shoulder. When brown eyes peep out of their eyelids and stare back down at her with worry, she reaches up to cup her face while pressing a quick kiss to her lips. "Would you want to come back with me tomorrow for my therapy session? You don't have to if you rather not, but just I want you to know that you're welcome to if you would like. I mean you should know what's going on, I guess, since our relationship is growing so much," she nervously asks, playing gently with Nicky's thick curly red hair.

Hearing that brings a sad smile to the redhead's face. She pulls Lorna closer, kissing the top of her head lovingly as she peers down at her, "Course' I want to come with ya, kid. I want to know everything that's going on in that pretty head of yours, and I'm glad to hear that you're okay with that." She lovingly runs her hand through her girlfriend's short hair while holding her tight. "Maybe being there with you will help keep you calm, so you don't run off again like the last time. Believe me, I don't think the therapist is only doing her job for the money - she seems to really want to help you, sweetie. Don't listen to those damn voices, they don't know a thing. Let's try to have a better appointment tomorrow, okay?" When she gets a reluctant nod, Nicky smiles and kisses her forehead. She strokes her back in soothing circles until the two drift to sleep.


The two head to the hospital that next afternoon and once they arrive in the waiting room near Lorna's therapist's office, they are quickly greeted by Doctor Reznikov. She has them follow her back to her office, and they both sit in the chairs opposite hers. While the two women are busy getting comfortable, she heads over to the teapot to get them all a hot cup of tea. Something she enjoys doing for all of her patients - she feels it makes the whole process all lot less dreary and painful.

Doctor Reznikov walks back to her desk, while handing each women a cup of the steaming tea. She places a kind smile on her face, looking between the two of them. Her eyes glance at the redhead who's sitting beside her patient, "Are you the famous Nicky she's been telling me about?" She asks, her tone friendly and kind as she takes a sip of her hot beverage.

Nicky nods as she squeezes Lorna's hand gently in her own. "Yeah, and I'm pretty sure I yelled at you the last time for Lorna's running out of here. Sorry bout' that, I just worry for my friend," she looks lovingly at the brunette who is nervously tapping her foot on the ground. She gently strokes her hand in an effort to help calm her nerves.

Nodding, the therapist jots something down in her notebook. She then peers over at Lorna, and gives her a reassuring smile. After what happened the last time, she definitely wasn't going to push anything out of the frail woman - not until she was ready to talk. "You set the pace, Lorna. We don't have to get into heavy details today if you're not ready for that. Just talk about whatever's on your mind and we'll go from there." She can see the tiny bit of resistance that her patience eyes hold and inwardly sighs. It's going to take quite a bit of time to get this girl to open up about her problems.

Gulping, Lorna apprehensively looks up at her. She doesn't even know what to say - that she just wants to be rid of the voices and the fantasies that her mind yearns to create. But she knows none of that will disappear on it's own, she has to actually work on other, healthier ways to cope with her problems. The thing is she hasn't the first idea how. "Well uh - Nicky and I are girlfriends now. That's something on my mind - and it makes me happy," she surprisingly blurts out, and her cheeks flush pink with embarrassment.

Nicky's heart melts when she hears Lorna tell the woman that - nearly a stranger to them. She carefully wraps an arm around her shoulder, giving her a gentle squeeze. It feels her body with warmth that the brunette had the strength to let someone know about their relationship - especially when they had no idea if this person was even okay with same-sex relationships [not that Nicky gave a shit what people thought, but she did know how sensitive Lorna was when it came to things like that].

"That's wonderful to hear, congratulations," the Russian woman says, a smile on her face as she observes her patient carefully. She writes some more notes down in her notebook. "Can you tell me what's going on in your head today? Are you hearing any voices or having hallucinations?"

Shaking her head, Lorna tenses up and focuses her eyes on the pattern of the desk. She traces it around with her fingers, tuning out from the conversation. She doesn't want to bring up any negative information today - she wants to feel happy, and talking about the voices will only bring her down. Her throat is a bit dry so she reaches for her cup of tea, taking a huge gulp. "What kind of material is this desk made out of? It's really pretty, and I love how it feels," the brunette wonders, completely ignoring her questions.

Jotting another thing down, Doctor Reznikov glances over at her. She sighs, knowing that they're not going to get anywhere today - Lorna's not ready to talk about it. "I believe the top is some sort of marble and the rest is all wood. Yeah, it's a pretty nice desk. My husband actually made it - he works for a warehouse company, where he was taught how to carve wood." There's no easy way for her to get this woman to open up about what's really going on inside of her. She knows pushing her to talk about it will only do her more harm, but not talking about it will also be detrimental for her.