What You Did

A/N: Sorry about being away for so long. I'll try to better myself. Many kisses flying your way.

The door opened soundlessly and a darkened staircase spread out before them, the sound of running feet and the smell of blood all too apparent. Kurt rushed down the steps into the darkness, uncaring where his feet landed. A dark shape vanished into an even darker corner. Ann-Britt pushed past him and set off after the shadowy figure. Kurt stepped further into the darkness, trying to find something to fix his eyes on. The air was cold and the metallic tang of blood combined with mildew hung like a clammy curtain above his head.

"Magnus," he breathed into the dark but received no reply. He took another step forward and bumped into something solid at the same time as something hanging from the ceiling swished past his head. Reaching up a shaky hand he felt a bare light bulb next to a string which he pulled. Dim light filtered through the dusty space.

When Kurt saw him lying there on that mattress it felt like the world had stopped. On legs that felt like they didn't belong to him he walked up to the terrifyingly still form lying on the mattress. Dropping to his knees he gathered him into his arms. He was too cold, too bloody. His hair felt moist under his chin and Kurt desperately grabbed for his neck in the hope to find a pulse. Nothing. No movement, just far too cold skin. The last of his strength left him and he slumped over the naked body in his arms, hugging him close. No, no, no, no, no! This is not allowed to happen.

"But I saved you…" Kurt whispered as tears streamed down his paralysed face. He gently caressed his trembling fingers over Magnus' cheek, his other hand gripping his shoulder hard enough to leave bruises. Kurt stared blindly up at the dark ceiling and tried to breath past the screaming pain in his chest. The faint, close to undetectable tapping against his fingers, made his heart skip a beat. Letting go of his neck Kurt placed his finger under Magnus' nose. His relief was otherworldly when he felt the faintest trace of breath on his finger. He heard a female voice yelling something indecipherable from across the room.

"Ann-Britt call an ambulance!" Kurt yelled, having somehow found his voice despite the soreness of his throat. "Ann-Britt ambulance!"

She was at his side in seconds, tearing the resisting cell phone from her jacket pocket, all the while muttering, "Oh God, oh God, oh God, oh my God Magnus, oh my God…!"

Kurt clung closer to Magnus' unconscious form while she yelled into the phone, her voice breaking terribly. Help would be here in mere minutes since the ambulance was already parked up on the road.

"I let him get away, Kurt!" Ann-Britt sniffled once she'd hung up the phone. "I let the bastard get away! There was another door in the back that we missed. I was so close and I let him get away!"

"No, no you didn't," Kurt replied, quite unaware as to what was actually being said, and pressed a kiss onto Magnus' head. Magnus stirred minutely in his arms. It was such a tiny movement at first he was sure he was imagining it. But there it was again, and a whisper. A breath of a word, so silent and painful to Kurt's ears despite not hearing what was said.

"I'm so sorry, Magnus," he whispered remorsefully into his hair. "I'm so sorry."

Magnus stirred again, his head dropping back to rest on Kurt's shoulder. Crystalline beads of tears were caught in his eyelashes and his hair clung to his forehead which was smeared with a mixture of blood and sweat. A broken looking ghostly pale hand grasped the fabric of Kurt's jacket and Magnus pulled himself closer. The shuddering breath ghosting across his skin felt like life itself. In the darkness, in the cold, Kurt and Magnus clung to each other as if the one being each the other's lifeline. Kurt felt Magnus' lips move against the skin on his throat like he was once again trying to speak. Blue-green eyes blinked open, unseeing as if still caught in a dream. A tear trickled down Magnus' cheek and disappeared into the tangle of bloodied curls. He blinked once and then squeezed his eyes tightly shut against whatever he was seeing in the half-light. Another whisper passed over his cracked lips, still pressed against Kurt as if fearful he would disappear into the dreamscape of his troubled mind, or even more troubled reality.

"I'm so tired." A whisper; a collection of sounds brought together to form a meaning. Three words connected into a sentence, and the underlying meaning of these words made Kurt more scared than he'd ever been in his life. He felt Magnus' hand lose its grip on his jacket and fall to the floor.

"Magnus!" Kurt screamed and shook him roughly, hoping to stir him back to consciousness. As he did Magnus' head tipped to the side making Kurt draw a sharp breath at the sight of his other cheek. What's he done to you? What's he done to you?

Kurt felt like he was drowning and hugged him close and supported his head against his shoulder like he would do an infant. But Magnus was no child, hadn't been one since that day twelve years ago, Kurt knew that much. When his eyes had found him moments before he could see no trace of the child he'd once been. Those eyes had been too old. Too old to belong to someone so young, so innocent and now so frail. The banging of heavy boots and the curses of rushed men reached his ears as the paramedics ran down the stairs. How long had it been since Ann-Britt called? Felt like hours. But they were there now, pulling Magnus from his weak arms and taking him away. Strong but trembling hands grabbed Kurt's shoulders to stop him from dragging Magnus back into his safe embrace. He didn't want them to take him away. Not now, not when he'd finally found him. But the strong hands and the gentle voice kept him in place and he had no choice but to stay where he was as he watched Magnus being carried away on a stretcher. He heard someone cry "no", but only realised later that it was himself. He was pulled to his feet and an arm sneaked itself around his waist to support his weight. Someone was leading him towards the stairs and he managed to wrap his arm around their shoulder. A cooing voice, reminding him of his mother's, sounded in his ear as they slowly ascended to the landing. A voice telling him he was doing well and that they were almost there. The bright light in the kitchen seemed to him distant and unreal. A moment later the creaking floor boards beneath his feet had been replaced by soggy grass and the smell of mildew and blood with pine trees. Time seemed to be moving at a staccato beat because before he knew it he was in a car being driven away from the cottage.

"Ann-Britt, where are we going?" Kurt heard himself ask while looking out the window at the swiftly passing scenery of autumn trees and empty fields half-covered in water from nearby ditches.

"I'm taking you home," answered Ann-Britt. Her voice shook but was somehow still steady. He could hear her wiping her running nose on the side of her hand before she continued, "I'm gonna get you in a shower and then we're gonna eat something. When we're done we are going to the hospital and wait for Magnus to get out of surgery."

"Okay," Kurt replied, his aching head pressed against the cool window. His breath misted the window and he was reminded of the feeling of Magnus' warm breath against his throat. He could easily recall many long nights during which he'd dreamed to feel that and more. But not like this, never like this. This should never have happened. Everything felt wrong and twisted inside him.

"We're here," Ann-Britt sounded defeated and when he finally looked at her he was surprised she was still amongst the living. Her skin was grey, almost green, and her eyes looked red and puffy. The stiffness and slowness of her movements betrayed her exhaustion as she hastily got out of the car.

"Is Linda home?" She asked after opening the door for him. His brain was too tired to even having registered her moving around the car and when he answered his voice was slurred as if he was drunk, "No, she's staying with a friend. Boyfriend I think."

He stopped halfway out the car and looked at her though finding it hard to keep her in focus. "Why aren't we going to the hospital?"

"Because you look about ready to pass out and neither one of us have eaten anything today." Ann-Britt held out her hand and he accepted it reluctantly. "And also…you need to clean up." She added the last part with a sad and reluctant look on her face.

Kurt didn't need to look down to know he was covered in blood. Magnus' blood. Squeezing his eyes shut against the tempest of unwanted feelings inside of him, only to open his eyes and finding himself on exactly the same spot. Saddened that the few seconds of darkness hadn't transported him back through time to happier days he began a trudging walk towards his front door. What he wouldn't give to go back just thirty hours. Just to go back and put in the extra effort to knock on Magnus' door instead of just calling his phone. Scattered images flashed like lightning across his mind. Images of Magnus' pale, bloodied body, of his face cut open and the smell of mildew that seemed to have rooted itself in Kurt's nose. His knees grew weak and felt Ann-Britt's arms around him again as he stumbled through the door. He had no memory of unlocking it but then felt Ann-Britt drop the keys back into his pocket. Consciousness was hard to hold on to and he feared the floor had turned into a sea. One part of him just wanted to let go and fall into a deep eternal sleep, but the other part was yelling at him to be a fucking man and protect the one he loved. Love, Kurt mused, yes I do. I love him.

Kurt pressed his free hand against the wall when they reached the bathroom. "I can manage on my own from here on…thank you."

Ann-Britt nodded and let go of him. He swayed somewhat ominously but managed to remain standing with the help of the wall. When he made to enter she held up her hand stopping him.

"Wait here a moment," she turned around and headed to the kitchen, leaving Kurt feeling very confused in a detached sort of way. She returned within a minute though, carrying a bundle of plastic bags. "You're gonna need to put your old clothes in these. They're evidence."

Kurt stared at the bags she's thrust into his hands and then nodded. "Sure…"

"I'll throw some clothes in while you're in the shower," she continued and he nodded again. "I'll order us some pizza or something."

She turned around and walked back into the kitchen before he had a chance to speak. What would he have said anyway? Squeezing the plastic bags with his sweaty hands he backed into the bathroom to the sound of crying coming from the kitchen.