CHAPTER ELEVEN

Derek groaned as the sunlight began to break though his sleep. There was a heavy weight on his chest and for the briefest moment he smiled as the remnants of his dream came back to him. A dream with warm chocolate eyes and a smirk that could soften a soft, or harden flesh. But the scent quickly chased away all thoughts causing his eyes to snap open. Squinting briefly before taking in the fold that lay stretched out across his chest. The smile remained as he watched Leah sleep awkwardly across him, a soft snore rumbling from her chest. Lifting his hand he ran his fingers thought the mass of red hair, her warmth mingling with that beneath his ribs.

Derek had never honestly allowed himself to believe that he could have this. A proper family of his own. Not after what he'd done. But despite his happiness at having what he'd never allowed himself to want, there was still an ache he knew would never be relieved. It was a price he was willing to pay however. Stiles for Leah.

Movement on his chest pulled him from his thoughts, as he dropped his eyes to see Leah beginning to wake. He smiled as she turned, cracking her eye open and looking at him with a sleepy smile. Derek concluded that he'd miss waking to that smile when he finally finished her room. "Morning sweetheart." he whispered.

"Morwin Daddy."

Derek turned his head to glance over at the other side of his bed, and Alex who was turned, her back on display to his gaze. She was still asleep. He could hear the slow steady beat of her heart. "Shell we go get breakfast?"

"Can we see 'iles today?"

Derek swallowed hard. "Not today sweetheart." when her face faltered and he had a vision of another screaming match he promised they'd see him soon.

She was still pouting miserably as he lifted her off him and set her feet on the floor beside the bed, before throwing back the covers and swinging his legs out of the bed.

"Come on. Let's get breakfast before Isaac eats everything in the house." he smiled, lifting her up to balance on his hip and grabbing his phone from the nightstand.

Derek carried her down the kitchen, already knowing that no one else was up. Setting her on the chair at the kitchen table, he switched on the coffee machine and turned to pull a bowl from the cupboard, followed swiftly by the box of Lucky Charms, Isaac usually ate. He made a mental note that he'd have to by more than one on their next shopping trip. Filling the bowl he walked to the refrigerator and poured the milk in while still holding the door open with his hip. Stepping back it swung shut and he turned to stroll over to the table, placing the bowl in front of Leah before fetching her a spoon and a glass of juice.

With her settled he paced back to make his coffee. Turning he found himself leaning back to watch her eat. When she'd finished with the cereal he watched her place her spoon to the side and lift the bowl, drinking the remaining milk. His heart clenched tight and without thinking he pulled his phone out of his pocket and snapped a photo. He was half way though sending it to Stiles when he realised what he was doing and froze. His heart beginning to race violently beneath his rips. Turning sharply he lowered his cup and phone to the counter and braced it with both hands, closing his eyes and fighting to take calming breathes. When he opened them his gaze instantly fell on the still open photo message he'd been writing.

Message:

Nothing will keep our….

His head went light for a second as the sentence was finished in his mind. …little girl from enjoying her breakfast. What the hell had be been thinking? Leah wasn't their girl. She was his and Alex's little girl.

"Derek? - You alright?" Isaac said with concern behind him.

Grabbing his phone he spun to meet the beta's blue eyes, swallowing his pounding heart. "I need…." he needs so many things. "…to get ready. Stay with Leah while I shower and change. - We'll go to the hardware store when your ready." with that he marched past the teenager, his fingers tight around the mobile.

He practically ran into the bathroom, switching on the shower not even caring that it ice cold. That was what he needed after all. He stripped quickly. Stepping in he tilted his face up into the frigid spray.

He didn't know how long he stood beneath the water; his skin was probably cold to the touch and red from the incident pounding of the downpour. He finally stepped out at the sound of movement from the bedroom, telling him Alex was awake. Closing his eyes he scrubbed at his face before turning off the water. He didn't want to face questions as to why he was having a cold shower. Though he knew he'd probably see it in the she-wolf's eyes.

He walked down in a haze, a towel hanging low on his hips. Alex was already gone, he could hear her down stairs with Isaac and Leah, and he thanked the heavens for it. He dressed quickly and moved to pick up his phone, his hand freezing over it, fearful of touching the device, like by merely laying a finger on it would bring back the feelings he's spent a shower trying to rid himself of.

But finally he picked it up, sending the photo message to his draft folder without even looking at it, as he left the bedroom and returned to the kitchen. "Go get ready." he ordered Isaac. "You'll be looking after Leah while I'm at the store." he said not bothering to look at Alex, though he felt her eyes on him. "It'll be a good time for you to reconnect."

"Derek I don't."

Derek turned to fix the woman with a hard stare. "This is why you're here. Why you're my mate." Isaac raced back into the kitchen as Derek finished his coffee. Setting the mug down he strolled over to Leah's chair, bending to place a kiss on her head, just like his father had always done to him and his siblings. "Be good. I'll be back soon." then he was walking determinedly out of the house. Ignoring the whining protest of his daughter.

~What's Best For Everyone, Isn't What's Easy~

Derek returned just over an hour later with supplies. Walking into the house he knew something was wrong. Alex was sat alone on the sofa, her face buried once again in a book. He could hear Leah's heartbeat above him, in his room.

"What happened?"

Alex didn't even look up from what she was reading. "She ran upstairs the moment you left." she states matter-of-factly.

"And you didn't go after her?"

Alex sent him a sideways glance. "Why would I?"

Derek stared at her speechless.

"I know where she is. I know she's alright. What more do I need to do?"

The door opened behind him as Isaac carried in the other half of the supplies.

"Take them up to the room. I'll be there in a minutes." he waited for the teenager to leave before continuing his conversation with Alex. "You're not even trying. I know you don't have experience dealing with humans, but she's your daughter." his tone was dripping with anger. "You can't keep pretending she doesn't exist. - For God's sake Alex, you raised her for three year, you can't tell me you feel nothing?" he snapped loudly.

Alex calmly lowered her book and turned to her. "You know what I felt? Shame. That's what I felt." she was so cool about it. "I kept waiting for her to change. For the wolf to show itself. But it never did. - And I never felt a bond. I couldn't feel that connection. The one you share with your pack. There was nothing." she got to her feet, facing him directly, her arms folded over her chest. "I told you that Derek, before you brought me here. That's why I left her with you. - You wanted this. You wanted me here! I told you how it would be, that I didn't want to be a mother to that…."

Derek growled.

"…to Leah….but you wouldn't listen."

Derek huffed angrily, his jaw painfully tight.

"I know why you want this, and I don't care. But this is how its going to be Derek. I'm your mate, but don't expect me to play mommy to her, because I can't do it."

"And if we have other children?" Derek asked, his fingers tightening dangerously around the handles of the paint cans.

"If we have other children and their human…it'll be just the shame."

Derek shook his head.

"You still want me here Derek?" she asked with a raised brow.

Derek stood silently for a long moment, staring at her before grunting. He turned sharply and headed for the stairs, unsure who he was more angry at, himself or Alex. She was right, she'd warned him before they'd come back that she wasn't going to be a good mother, but he'd thought - he'd hoped. - that she would at least try to bond with Leah. She was her daughter. He couldn't understand how you couldn't feel anything? He'd spent less than a day with the girl and had felt the connection. He felt it now. A warmth in his heart for her.

"Nephew."

Derek looked up to see Peter stood on the top step. He sighed warily. "Peter."

"Trouble in paradise?"

Derek didn't reply; he just brushed past him.

"I know what your doing Derek." Peter smirked, causing his nephew to freeze, turning slowly to meet the man's gaze.

The pair stared at each other, neither voicing the truth.

"It won't work." Peter finally said in a low neutral tone.

Derek sighed, closing his eyes for a second. "It has to." when he opens them Peter was staring at him, sympathy and understand in his gaze.

"She won't bond with her. - She was raised among only wolves, she doesn't understand the subtle difference between wolf bonds and human, not like we do. - Perhaps it would be best if…."

Derek shook his head. "She's my mate." he looked down the stairs towards the lounge where he knew Alex could hear them. "She'll learn."

Peter sighed, shaking his head. "You think your doing what's best don't you?"

Derek remained silent, staring once again at his uncle.

"Your not. - A pack is only as strong as its Alpha Derek, you know that. And an Alpha is only as strong as its pack. Denying what you…."

"Don't you have something else to be doing?" Derek snapped cutting the man off and heading for the empty bedroom next to his.

"You know where to find me." Peter whispered, continuing down the stair.

Derek turned to watch him, leaning over the banister. "We're going to have to talk about this Peter. She's too young."

The other werewolf pausing looking up at his nephew with a wicked pleased smirk. "That's your problem Derek; you still see them as children. - They haven't been that for a long time." then he was gone, leaving Derek to be haunted by the words for the rest of the day.

~What's Best For Everyone, Isn't What's Easy~

Derek woke early Monday morning to the screaming of his alarm clock and that heavy weight on his chest once again, only this time there was long limbs around his neck too. Smiling he disentangled himself from his daughter, reached out to shut of the alarm and roll out of bed. He had to head into work, sort out the paper work, and get started on Mr Thomas's car. And Leah needed to be dropped off at day care. He hadn't hoped that now Alex was there she could be kept home, but after the previous day Derek knew that was an impossibility. So he dragged himself out of bed and jumped into the shower, leaving Alex to sleep. Leah was curled around his pillow, her face buried into it. It was moments like that that made it heard to believe she wasn't a werewolf.

Derek smiled softly as he ran his fingers though the little girl's hair and gently shook her awake. "Sweetheart, it's time to wake up. You've got school." he could hear Isaac dragging himself out of the bed down the hall. Leah cracked open an eye and smiled sleepily.

"Morwin Daddy."

"Morning sweetheart, come on. Lets get you ready."

Leah gave a large stretch and yawn before rolling off the mattress and following Derek out of the room and into what would soon be her room, as soon as the paint was dry and the smell had dissipated. Derek had hung up what few items of clothing he'd brought during his shopping trip the previous day in the closest.

When he'd returned with the pink and blue paint, meaning to recreate Leah's room at the Stilinski house, she's refused it. Saying she didn't want a pink bedroom anymore. That she hated pink. Derek had known it was a lie instantly, that she was acting out and part of him had wanted to tell her that she was getting a pink and blue bedroom whether she liked it or not. But then he'd look at her, her pouting lip and her stubborn demeanour and he'd crumbled to her will. He'd told Isaac to store the paint in the basement. He decided then to take Leah to the store and let her pick whatever paint she wanted. Which was when he'd realised she had no clothes. He'd thought about driving to the Stilinski house to collect her stuff but he'd decided against it. It was too soon. So instead he'd simply asked Leah what colour she wanted instead, to which he'd gotten a shrug, another miserable look and then a mumbled purple. Then he'd driven back into town, dropping by the hardware store first then to a children's clothes store. Where he'd had no idea what he was doing and had wound up texting Peter for help. - Or more precisely the person he was undoubtedly with.

Lydia had given him a size and a rough idea what she'd need until he was able to collect her stuff, and then he'd headed back to the house with more bags to finish preparing Leah's room. He still needed to get a suitable bed for her, but that was one of his tasks of the day. Right now though, he had to get her ready.

"So what do you want to wear?" he asked, looking blankly at the small row of clothes.

Leah looked up at him and shrugged, her lips pressed tight together.

"A dress? How about this one?" he asked pulling out a purple and blue flowering thing.

Leah's nose instantly crumpled and she shook her head vigorously.

"Okay, not this then. Seriously I wish your aunt Laura was here, she'd know what to do." as he said it a sharp pain shot through him, making him freeze. "He hadn't thought about Laura in a long time. - Or at least he hadn't thought about her. She was always on his mind, but at the back, like a constant ache that you just got used to. "She would have loved you." Derek sighed sadly.

He frowned at the feel of small arms wrapping around his leg. Looking down he saw Leah pressed against him, looking up at him with something close to sympathy in her young eyes. Derek smiled and brushed his fingers through her hair. "How about jeans and a sweatshirt?"

Leah nodded.

With Leah dressed in black jeans and a dark blue sweatshirt, Derek carried her down to the kitchen for breakfast. Isaac was at the table eating. When he looked up to see them he smirked, almost laughing and pulled out his phone with supernatural speed, snapping a picture.

"Did you just take our photo?" Derek glared as he settled Leah in her seat.

"Couldn't resisted. You two look so…" he laughed around his cereal. "….adorable."

Derek growled a little before moving to get his daughter her breakfast and himself a coffee. "Do you have Lacrosse today?"

"Yeah." Isaac said, poking his tongue out to Leah, who swiftly returned the gesture. "Why?"

"Just checking." he settled a bowl in front of Leah and turned his back while she ate.

Twenty minutes later the three of them were in the car heading to Leah's day care. They pulled into the parking lot and Derek and Isaac both climbed out. Isaac pulling his seat forward to get Leah from the backseat.

"Dammit!" Derek snapped making the pair look at him as Isaac straightened with the little girl in his arms.

"What?"

Derek nodded to the other children. "I forget to make her a lunch."

Isaac looked at Leah and rolled his eyes. "Silly Daddy." he sighed, causing Leah to burst into giggles, before turning and shaking her head at Derek.

The werewolf glared at the pair of them. "I'll drop something back for you. - Come on, lets get you inside."

Isaac lowered her to the ground. "See ya later Gidget."

Leah grinned, nodded and gave him a tight hug, pressing a kiss to the teenager's cheek before reaching for Derek's hand and dragging him towards the building and her teacher.

"Mrs Gwegorwee!" she squealed. "My Daddy's home!"

Derek looked at the young woman and smiled.

"That's wonderful news Leah." Helena nodded, lifting her gaze to Derek. "Welcome back Mr Hale. - I'm Helena Gregory, Leah's teacher. It's good to finally meet you."

Derek shook her hand and nodded. "You too."

"Daddy forgot my lunch Mrs Gwegorwee." Leah giggled.

"Oh…."

"I'll drop something back." Derek insisted. "I…it's been a hectic couple of days and I was in a bit of a rush."

"It's fine. We always keep a spare couple of lunches for those children that can't bring their own or like you have forgotten."

Derek sighed with relief. "Thank you."

"Don't worry. - So will you or Stiles be picking her up later?"

Leah released a miserable sigh that hit Derek right in the stomach. Clearing his throat he met the teachers gaze. "Me. I'll be collecting her from now on."

The woman looked at him intensely, then Leah and seemed to understand. "I see. So…" she looked at Leah again. "Leah why don't you say goodbye to your dad and go inside."

She nodded, tugged on Derek's arm until he bent down to her level, where she wrapped her arms around his neck, squeezing tight and kissed his cheek. "Bye Daddy." then she was racing into the building.

Mrs Gregory cleared her throat. "So…just so we're clear, Stiles will not be collecting Leah again?"

Derek tightened his jaw, ignoring the pain that shot through his chest at the mere mention of the teenager. "Not for a while."

"So if he turns up I'm not to allow her to go with him?"

Derek's eyes went wide. "What? No. - I mean yes…." he hadn't really thought about it. It wasn't like Stiles was going to try and kidnap her. The boy wouldn't do that to him. And if he tried he knew he wouldn't get very far. "….its just that he's a little occupied with school work at the moment, and I'm back now so I'll be collecting her. - But if he come, well….yeah."

Mrs Gregory visibly relax. "Oh well that's good. I'd hate to think that Leah was going to be caught in the middle of some kind of agreement. Break-up's are always hard on the children and we try to be there for them."

Derek frowned. "It's not a break-up."

"Oh, no…I know I'm just….well she is obviously very attracted to Stiles and well if he's suddenly no longer allowed in her life it might difficult on her."

Derek's jaw tightened and his hands curled into fists in his pocket. "Stiles is allowed to see her. - He just needs to concentrate of his school work. - I should never have gotten him to look after her in the first place. But he was the only person I could trust with her."

Mrs Gregory's heart was racing in a panic, and it could clearly be heard from the car because Isaac was yelling out of the window for Derek to hurry up, he needed to get to school.

"I need to go." Derek said, forcing himself to be calm. "It was nice to meet you Mrs Gregory. I'll be by to pick Leah up at….what time?"

"Four O'clock."

"Four." Derek nodded; turning and marching back to the Camaro, yanking the door open violently.

"You heard all that?" Derek snapped as he started the engine.

"Yeah." Isaac nodded cautiously.

"If Stiles decided to collect Leah, make sure he or you let me know."

"You want me to tell him not to?" Isaac asked nervously.

"No. Just that I want to know. - I don't what this to….just let me know."

Ten minutes later they were pulling up outside Beacon Hills High. Derek's knuckles white on the steering wheel as he sees Scott and Stiles walking towards the building. The teenager meets his gaze for a second before dropping his head and speeding towards the doors. This was not what he wanted. He had to find a way to bring them all back together as a pack.