I feel as though I'm constantly having to apologise to you guys for neglecting to update, and for that, I'm so sorry. I guess I've let school catch up to me again, and I know that I shouldn't, but I am. Anyways, to anyone who reads this, please review. It's not going to be one of my happiest chapters by a long shot, so I would suggest reading by some tissues and a bunch of chocolates.

Enjoy this chapter!

-I am Katniss Everdeen

"Miss Granger, I believe you know what time it is," Dumbledore told me. I felt my heart drop, but I knew that he was right. I knew that my month was up, and I was glad that I was able to spend that month with Severus and my friends. In all honesty, there's nothing I've done in this past month that I can truthfully say that I regret, which makes going back a bit more easy.

"I know, Headmaster. May I just say goodbye to Severus before I go?" I asked. Dumbledore looked at me with his normally twinkling eyes and sighed.

"I'm afraid not, Miss Granger. It's time to go now, and there's nothing I can do to stop it. I'm sorry."

I lowered my head. I know that I shouldn't have been so saddened by not being able to say goodbye, but I wish that I would have been able to say goodbye.

"I understand, sir. I think I should be going, then," I said. Dumbledore nodded understandingly and took out my previously ruined time-turner.

"Come on, Miss Granger, let's go then."

With that said, he took me by the hand and he opened what seemed to be a portal, carefully pushing my through. Unlike my earlier time tumbling back, this travel was more like my usual. It was natural feeling and went much more smoothly. When my 'trip' ended, I found myself in front of Snape's classroom door.

I debated knocking on his door before losing courage and walking away. Not soon afterwards, I heard the door open behind me, and I silently cursed myself and Severus.

"What do you want, Miss Granger?" I heard his silken voice ask. I gnawed on my lip and slowly turned around.

"I-I'm sorry, Sev-"

"Don't you ever fucking call me that again. And if you ever think about coming back here again for personal reasons, you can throw that silly little notion out of your know-it-all brain," he sneered, slamming the door in my face. I felt tears well up in my eyes and it felt as though I had swallowed a pound of clay. I walked away from his door and back to my room. On the way there, Dumbledore saw me, but he merely smiled and welcomed me back to Hogwarts. I tried to smile, but there really wasn't anything to smile about. The man I loved didn't give a damn whether or not I lived or died.

I got up to my room and fell on my bed and cried.

Suddenly, there was a knocking at my door.

"Come in," I called out as normally as I could. I saw Ginny peek her head inside of my room. I got up and ran to her. I haven't seen my best friend in what seemed like years.

Ginny enveloped me in a hug and squeezed me tightly.

"Oh Hermione, everyone heard about what happened to you! Are you alright? What happened where you were?" She bombarded me with questions. I told her to sit down and calm down.

"I'll tell you my story once you calm yourself, okay?" I asked her. She nodded and sat down on my bed, looking at me expectantly. I took a deep breath, and started at the beginning.

"Well, it all started when I had detention with Professor Snape…"


"Hermione, that's so heart-breaking! I can't believe you had to go through that! What an asshole, he should have been here for you," Ginny finally said. I pursed my lips and shrugged my shoulders.

"It's been twenty years, Ginny. Of course he hates me now. I left without even saying goodbye after we'd had sex, too. I'm a terrible person," I decided. Ginny rolled her eyes.

"You know that it wasn't your decision to leave, Hermione. You know that it was Dumbledore's decision. You have no reason to blame yourself," she pointed out. I suppose she had a point, but I should have never left him. He had every reason to hate me forever.

I felt a tear roll down my cheek. Ginny summoned a house elf and ordered us some hot chocolate.

"Here, love. This will make you feel better, I promise," she told me, handing me a cup and taking one for herself. I sipped it slowly and soon found myself going to sleep.

"I will never forgive you. I hate you, Granger, I hate you."

Each word Severus spoke felt like a blade being plunged into my chest. I couldn't take it. I love him. I will always love him, even when he doesn't love me.

"Severus, please listen-"

"I never want to hear you say my name ever again! I hate you! I hate you so fucking much! Just die! Stay away from me forever!" he screamed at me. I could feel each tear running down my face and I turned and ran away, running from him, and the pain. Running from everything.


I awoke with a startled gasp and looked around my room, breathing heavily. Ginny had fallen asleep and was now laying in bed with me. I saw that it was very early in the morning; 3:21 a.m.

I knew that I wouldn't be going to sleep anytime soon, so I got up and began dressing for the day. Today would be difficult, dealing with curious busybodies and trying to act like I didn't even care that Severus hates me. I would have to put on the façade of someone who just didn't give a damn anymore. I squared my shoulders and began to style my hair. Today would be different. Today, I won't be a nobody. Today, people will see me and think that I'm beautiful.

I dug out some make-up and began applying it the way Lily would.

Today, I won't be recognisable.

When Ginny woke up, she was thoroughly stunned, but she liked my new look. Hopefully everyone else would as well.

We headed down to breakfast together and met with Harry and Ron, both who were shocked by both my story and my appearance. Harry wanted to know more about his parents, so I entertained him with stories about his mother and the Marauders. By the time we went into the Great Hall to get breakfast, everyone knew that I was back and everyone was looking at me as I ordered my food and ate.

When breakfast was over, Ginny went off to Transfiguration, Harry and Ron went to Care for Magical Creatures, and I met with Draco to go to Potions, my most dreaded class for today.

"Granger, what happened to you? You were gone for quite a few months," Draco asked on our way to the Dungeons. I gave him a watered down version and made him promise not to tell anyone. We walked into Potions and thankfully, one glare from him was enough to ward off curious people. I sat with him and we engaged in mindless chatter to fill the awkwardness in between us. I remembered how we first began to become friends in our fifth year.

Draco desperately wanted to be in the DA, but I knew that Harry would never allow it; therefore, I agreed to meet with him once a month to teach him most defensive things we learned. At first, I was wary of him, and vice versa, but in sixth year, I became his confidante, and he mine. We kept our friendship pretty secretive until the beginning of seventh year, but we were both Heads, so it seemed pretty normal to everyone else.

Up until now, I haven't told anyone about our previous friendship, and Draco had done the same.

Like the usual Professor Snape, Severus entered with a startling boom, but no one jumped, as everyone had become accustomed to his dramatic ways in the second year.

"When I tell you to, get a cauldron, the ingredients on the board, and if you can find it, retrieve your brain from the recesses of your abysmal heads and get started on the potion. Go," he sneered before sitting at his desk. I waited at the desk while Draco got the ingredients for our Drowsiness Potion.

We got started right away, and with our brains combined, our potion was finished first. I bottled it and went to give it to Severus for his approval. He glared at me when I walked over to his desk, but took our potion as he had to do his job. He inspected the potion and put it on a desk.

"Well? What do you expect, a pat on the head? Go back to your seat, you insufferable girl," he snarled. I swallowed back tears and walked back to my and Draco's desk. He looked at me with sympathy and discreetly took my hand, trying to give me comfort. I felt grateful, but knew that Severus had seen what Draco had done and was now glaring at the both of us, so I gently took my hand away from him and pulled out a book to read while everyone else finished up their potions.

The silence was broken by Severus' voice.

"Obviously my class is too boring for you, Granger. Stay after class so that we may discuss your blatant display of rudeness in my classroom," he said, before returning to grading his papers. I stared at him in shock, as well as the rest of the class. What the hell was wrong with him?

No one wanted to stand up for me as Snape could easily bring his wrath down upon him or her as well.

Too soon, the class ended, and I told Draco not to wait up on me, as I would probably be chewed out for a while. He reluctantly agreed and left. I walked over to Severus' desk and looked at him expectantly.

"Why are you staring at me, you impudent child?" he asked me as though I were nothing more than a fool. My temper snapped.

"What is you issue? I'm sorry you're acting all pissed off at me because I had to leave you twenty years ago, but I hope you know that I had to leave because Dumbledore told me. I hope you know that I never fucking wanted to leave, but I was told a month before that I either had to leave then, or I had to leave when I did. I chose to stay with you because I fucking loved you, Snape. I was forced to leave. I'm sorry that I did, but there was nothing I could do about it and you damn well know that. I know that you loved me. I know you did. I'm sorry that you hate me so much now, but I know that what we had was meaningful. I know that when we had sex, there was something there. I don't care if you don't want to admit it, but there was something that we had together," I told him, my hair frizzing, my face red.

He stared at me for a moment before getting up.

"Get out, Granger. We had nothing, so don't confuse yourself with these silly delusions. All you ever were was a pastime and now, that's over and done with. We never had anything but a fuck and leave relationship, and that's exactly what we did. We fucked. You left. Simple as that," he said, going to open the door. I stared at him in disbelief.

"Did you not hear a fucking word that I just said? I never wanted to leave, dammit! I wanted to stay with you, I wanted to leave with you and stay with you. Hell, I would have wanted more than that! But Dumbledore made me leave through a portal through time. I don't know how else to make you see that. If you can't tell that I'm telling the truth, then maybe you're right. Maybe we never had anything at all. Maybe I should just give these the fuck back then!" I pulled my hair back and took out the earrings he had given me so long ago, put them on his desk, and walked out.

"Hermione, wait! I- You know I didn't-"

I didn't bother hearing what he said afterwards, I was so angry. I made sure that I had all of my stuff and walked to my next class.

Maybe we never really had anything special.

Maybe everything he told me about how much he loved me was a lie, too.

I bet everything was a lie. He never loved me, he never wanted me for anything more than a plaything that he could use and forget about.

I should have never trusted him.

I hate myself for falling for him.