A/N: Holy crap this one is long. It must be riddled with grammar errors so excuse those please. SMUT ALERT. *smiles deviously*
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-/ The Gateway Part XI /-
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Korra waited impatiently for nightfall, knees pulled into her chest as she stared blankly into the darkness. Although there were no indicators of time in her cell – su ch as a clock or even a window so she could check the amount of light in the sky – she could feel the night falling. The muscles in beneath the skin of her arms and legs rippled, chi flowing dully even though it was supposed to be blocked, as the rising moon strengthened her. It was one of the benefits of being of the Water Tribe: she drew her strength from the darkness and the moon. The intensity of the power even suggested it was a full moon - Korra wasn't sure though. She might have been feeling just a little too anxious to get out of the Equalist prison and as far away from Amon as possible.
She refused to let her mind rack with the painful thoughts of his goodbye. He had addressed her as 'Avatar' and it felt like a cold slap in the face. She resented being called that; her greatest insecurity was that people respected her, not because she was a decent human being but, because of her title. She supposed that insecurity came with the job - and it was increasingly starting to feel like one - but Korra couldn't help but let her mind wander.
She was so lost. As she quietly analyzed her childhood - not filled with friends and toys but with seclusion and near-constant training - the faith in her past seemed to stand shaky ground. And spirits forget her future; Korra had no clue how she was going to defeat a man that seemed to be two very different men: the one who terrified her and angered her because of his defiance and perversion of 'energybending,' and the man who tenderly told her that he cared not for the Avatar, but for Korra. And La, when he said her name it made her crumble.
Equally, when he differed back to merely calling her 'Avatar' she evaporated into nothing.
What if she weren't the Avatar? Like she had told Amon, she would have most likely lived and died a housewife. She wouldn't know Master Katara or Tenzin, she would have never met the only true friends her own age Mako and Bolin, and she wouldn't be her.
An idealist part of her wondered what if... she had met Amon before he became Amon. The fantasy floated in her mind, fleeting and glowing, but she quickly pushed it away. Yes, Korra was being an idealist. She always had the insatiable desire to save everyone. But was that her or the Avatar...? Did that inept need stem from her personality or had her eleven years of training conditioned her into that mold?
Korra had very seldom been touched by self-doubt, that is until she came to Republic City and was confronted by the stark realization that she had no airbending skills. Yet, it had seemed that after a terrifying visit to the Spirit World and being held up in a prison with a psychotic Equalist who took pleasure in electrocuting her, she was able to generate some semblance of airbending. She wasn't sure about that. But the doubts, nevertheless, haunted her as she began to fall off her tower of confidence and realized that there was truly more to being the Avatar than merely fighting.
It took instincts. Aang had told her to follow them, as if she didn't already before. Did Korra ever listen to her instincts? Perhaps her rash actions, in the past, were not instinctual but impulsive. Challenging Amon before she barely had a grapple on what it took to be the Avatar. Like going to Damen Shi in the first place - yes, that was definitely stupid on her part. Slowly, she was beginning to accept that mistake in particular since it ultimately led to her contacting Aang and unlocking her airbending.
And she met Meng - well, Amon.
What was the difference?
Korra slammed a fist into the wall behind her, yelling in frustration as she thrashed on the bed. Being imprisoned... it was like bottling her up and making a time bomb out of her. When were they going to let her go?
I have to get out of here, she thought, desolation getting the better of her as she climbed out of the bed and began to pace back and forth. Maybe she could teach herself to metalbend; yes, she recalled the story of how Toph Beifong did it - she was imprisoned. Korra approached the metal door of her cell and patted it. Testing it. She then fell into a horse stance, eyebrows furrowing in concentration as she took a deep breath.
Balance. Focus. Strength.
She let her muscles coil, building up the kinetic energy as she brought a fist backward. Chi pulsing from her stomach, she thrust her fist forward, her knuckles colliding with the metal...
"GAH!" she yelped, the distinct sound of bones cracking in her ears. Doubling over, Korra's hip slammed into the floor as she braced her bloody fist to her chest. Blood soaked into her blue shirt, probably staining it. Furious tears splurged from her eyes as she examined the damage. Yep, she had mangled her knuckles into a broken mess. They would heal fast, especially if she had some water to soak them in, but the pain was wrenching nonetheless.
So apparently Korra's chi was still blocked, or perhaps she just couldn't metalbend.
You were being impulsive again, she reminded herself, eyes fluttering shut as she cradled her mangled hand to her chest. Perhaps it was time to be patient, and wait for her opportunity to come.
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Once Korra finally accepted that her escape wasn't eminent, she was able to drift off into a peacefully numb sleep. Her dreams were nonsensical, colorful, and best of all not filled with him. For the first time since she escaped the Spirit World, she felt a semblance of control, of inner balance.
The rattling of the cell door quickly awoke from her sleep, and she flew up defensively.
"Listen, Avatar," a familiar and mean voice rang sternly. "For some reason, Amon thinks that keeping you here will be troublesome. I trust his judgement, but I don't trust you."
"What have I done to you?" Korra asked quietly, still caught in a dream-like state as she looked upon man, whose face was - as usual - partially concealed under a fabricated mask.
"It doesn't matter now, it's too late for you to change anything." Korra thought about empathizing, but knew it would have no affect on someone who already hated her so passionately.
Korra's eyes narrowed as he approached, and he pulled his kali sticks from behind his back. He flicked on their switches, causing their electrical currents to come to life.
"Ooohhh, no," Korra said firmly, taking a few steps back as her eyes widened. "You are not electrocuting me again."
"If you come without a fight, I won't have to."
stubbornness urged Korra to punch him in the face then and there, but the throbbing in her knuckles suggested that would be unhelpful.
"Fine," she muttered. The lieutenant tucked one of his rods away, keeping the other ready in his dominate hand. With his other, he pulled a rectangular piece of fabric from his belt and threw it at Korra.
"Put it on," he barked.
Korra moved to follow his order, but then quirked an eyebrow. "Why?"
"So you won't be leading the police here anytime soon," he murmured in disgust, as if his answer was obvious.
Korra rolled her eyes as she wrapped the blindfold around her head, tying it in the back. As soon as her arms dropped, she felt him roughly grab her by the bicep and drag her from the cell, then pushing her down whatever corridor they were on.
Soon, she felt herself being pushed into something - maybe the back of a satomobile. Fear flamed in her chest and she peeled off her blindfold only finding herself in darkness. She could feel the vibrations of a car's engine beneath her, and her suspicions were confirmed.
Amon said he was letting you go, she tried to comfort herself and failed. Feeling a pang of betrayal in the pit of her stomach, she began to doubt her instinct that he had told the truth. For him, the truth was whatever was convenient - whatever he could say to earn someones trust.
He had broken her trust in him.
She crawled into the corner, glaring into the void.
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The next thing Korra knew, the truck squealed to a stop and the doors slung open. The reflection of tinted green goggles reflected in the moonlight, reminded her of her nightmares of the Equalists ambushing her. She rolled in the corner, but quickly felt the whipping of binds around her ankle as they drug her out.
The chi blockers tossed her to the ground, her head cracking against pavement and rocks beveling her cheek as she groaned. Then she heard the revving of the engine, and she was alone. Her thoughts were blurry, perhaps from the trauma to her head, and she tried to lift herself. She failed, crumbling back down. It seemed like they had dumped her in the middle of a street, dimly lit by lamps. But this place looked familiar, even in the darkness...
"I heard something out here!" a familiar voice called, and the sound of footsteps made Korra lift her eyes from the ground. "There's someone here - oh Korra!"
Looking up, Korra smiled with extraordinary relief. "Tenzin," she breathed, propping herself up on an elbow and reaching for him. He fell to his knees, capturing her in his embrace and cradled her limp and battered body.
"You...I thought you were gone," he whispered into her hair. Pulling apart, he brought his hands to her cheeks and examined her face. "What happened, Korra?"
The smile was wiped clean off her face, and she closed her eyes. She refused to answer
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A few weeks passed, and Korra never fully divulged the details of her absence. Tenzin wasn't very adamant about knowing the details, either, as if he sensed the pain recollection caused.
"I went to Damen Shi, and was almost killed by a spirit," was the most she had told him about her presence in the Spirit World. "Amon captured me and then let me go," was also the length she explained her preceeding imprisonment. It wasn't like he would understand all the details: how a man who called himself Meng - who was actually a amnesic Amon - swept her off her ignorant feet and helped her escape the sociopathic spirit called Jorn (who by the way, liked to dress up as Avatar Aang) and that once Meng/Amon and her escaped he immediately took her captive only to, once again, sweep her off her feet and then let her go.
No, that version was far too complicated.
Korra found herself quiet and secluded, meditating more often than not. She wished that meditating could ease her mind, but it mostly resulted in more pain as the memories flowed into her mind easier. She would be thinking of a white place, bland and boring, and then the silhouette of his mask would invade her thoughts. Seeing it, clear and vivid, should have scared her like it did before her adventure to Damen Shi - but it did not.
One day it was a little frigid and there was a light snow covering the floor of the meditation gazebo. The sun was about halfway up in the sky, a faint silhouette of a moon hanging just over the skyscrapers of Republic City. Korra, as she did around noon every day, slipped into her jacket and sat cross-legged on the floor. She pressed her fists together, letting her mind empty itself, filling with the whiteness.
Her eyes twitched beneath her lids as she visualized herself, walking the in field of nothingness. Enamored by the peace, her inner-self smiled as she burst into a sprint. Freedom, yes, this is what freedom felt like. Running towards absolutely nothing and away from nothing. She was in control.
Her mind slipped, as it usually did, and she felt a figure approaching from behind her. Korra's heart began to race as goosebumps crawled across her skin.
Her inner-self blanched, turning around with widened eyes.
It was him, and his mask, coming towards her in a slow haste that made her tongue go numb. She couldn't cry out to him, it was merely a meditory visualization, but met him in the center of whiteness.
No fear, but facination.
Korra's inner-self smiled and reached toward the mask. Her lips twitched outside her mind as well. When she visualized herself touching the mask, electricity shocked through her body. She wanted more.
She grasped him by his shoulders, and he didn't move. In a smooth motion, she stood up on her toes a kissed the lips of the mask, her tongue brushing across the divuts of its smirk. She hated that smirk, but she wanted the smirk to be for her.
She then imagined him pulling her close, egging her to continue stroking the mask with her tongue as if he could feel it. His fingers scraped over her scalp as he tugged her ponytail, yanking it and making her mewl against the cold porcelain...
Korra gasped and forced her eyes to open, abandoning the vision. Her whole body was shuddering, heat flushing through her body despite the cold temperature. Sweat beaded on her forehead and her lower stomach was burning with wanting. Quickly, she waved a hand and bended some snow from the ground, coated her hands with water, and then smacked herself across the face.
Her chin dripped with water as she tried to slow her breathing. Her own salty tears began to mix with the melted snow.
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"Korra, are you alright?"
Korra leaning against the railing of the gazebo, staring over the hills of the island and off into Yue Bay. It was evening and the sweltering head in her body had never squelched. Her body felt like it was on fire.
She jumped at the sound of Tenzin's voice; he was hovering right behind her. She nodded noncommittal as he placed a hand on her shoulder.
"It's been a week, and you still haven't told me what happened," he said softly. "Perhaps it would help if you talked about it..."
Korra jerked away from him, narrowing her eyes. "No. It wouldn't." She was usually never so coarse... but she didn't want to talk to him.
With that, she trotted away, arms folded over her chest, and back toward the Air Temple. Tenzin ushered behind her. "Please, Korra, we're all so worried about you. Please at least tell me that... you weren't... dishonored..."
Korra stopped in her track, turning to face Tenzin. She pressed her lips together, trying to hold back a giddy laugh that was building in the her stomach. Was he asking if she had been raped? The idea was absurd...laughable...horrible... "No!"
Tenzin watched her with an odd expression, his eyes glinting with concern as her face contorted.
Korra suddenly felt her mind shift, her giggling morphing into an unsure laugh. Her cheeks reddened and swelled, eyes dampening. Her laughter changed to sobbing, and she threw herself into Tenzin's arms.
She sobbed into his chest, furious tears streaming down her face as shame consumed her. She had slept with Amon... the enemy...
And she fantasized about doing it again.
"In the spirit world," Korra began, sniffing. "I ... there was a man. A human."
He mumbled comfortingly, patting a hand on her back as he encased her in a fatherly embrace.
"I gave myself to him," she said, anticipating shame as Tenzin held her. To her surprise, he said nothing, which was almost worse. She gave in a little further. "I love him."
The atmosphere changed, as this was the first time since she was in the Spirit World that she let herself admit that solemn truth: even though she knew who he was - and that he wanted to destroy her - she couldn't help but still keep the fleeting and impulsive feelings toward him. Masochistic, that's what she was. To love a liar and your enemy... it was as if she were asking for this pain. It was actually quite ridiculous, she had considered in moments of rational thought, that she even fell for him in the first place. Though she was quite aware of the fact that when the Avatars fall... they fall fast and hard. Despite everything, Amon's little alter-ego had saved her multiple times.
"...and he didn't make it out...?" Tenzin murmured, breaking his thoughts.
Korra found it harder to speak. She had intended to be truthful, but feared the consequences of Tenzin knowing the whole truth. In a way, the man she loved did not leave the Spirit World. He stayed, keeping a piece of her with him.
It was easier to believe that little half-truth than to accept that everything was a lie.
"No, he didn't."
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Tenzin was satisfied by her dishonest confession and let her go to bed without eating. Her stomach churned with grief; she almost wished Amon had stayed in the Spirit World. Almost. It sure would have made defeating the Equalists an easier task.
Korra crawled into bed, tucking herself fully clothed beneath her comforter. Naga lay beside her bed, already entering a slumbering state. Ever since that day, Naga had been on edge and seldom left Korra's side due to fear of her disappearing again. Korra couldn't say she wasn't glad - her heart hand bounded with joy when Tenzin informed her that Naga came back to Republic City as soon as she disappeared.
Korra absent-mindedly ran her fingers through Naga's thick fur and smiled, trying to suppress the aching her chest.
If Amon hadn't left with her... Korra would have gone back for him. Without a doubt. Even with the knowledge of his identity, she would have gone back to that hellish place and brought him back to the mortal world. There was a twist of longing in her stomach, and her eyes fluttered shut. This time, she didn't try to hold back the floodgates pain, but embraced each memory as if they were her last.
His eyes, warm and protective, watching her like an eagle-hawk. Eventually the protectiveness faded, and he watched her more like a predator does their prey. Each movement toward her was like stalking, the space between them would fill with heat and tension that made her head spin. Korra's body warmed as she tried to imagine the musty, salty scent of his breath.
Oddly enough, she could smell it; she never knew her sensory memory was so sharp. Shuddering as she exhaled, a sly smile crossed her lip. If only she could feel his hands cascading down her stomach and further where the flames of arousal were beginning to flicker.
Korra jumped. Naga was suddenly barking, and Korra sat up out of her bed quickly.
"Damn it." A ragged whisper cut through the darkness and her window hung open, the dim light of evening casting a shadow. Korra rolled out of bed and hurled a fist toward the figure, who dodged it quickly and then caught her wrist. Korra cried out, but a hand quickly covered her mouth to muffle her yell. She bit the hand, and the masculine voice curse.
"Fuck. You bit me." Korra calmed herself down long enough to recognize the voice. Eyes widening, grabbed Naga by her harness and ushered her out of the room.
"It's okay, girl, just go," she whispered harshly, closing the door behind her polar bear dog and leaning against it.
He was there, lingering in her room, masked and everything, watching her. She couldn't see his eyes, but as he rubbed the hand she bit she knew his was angry.
"What are you doing here?" she demanded, walking toward him a little. She kept an proper distance, in a feeble attempt to keep her excitement at bay. He was here. Her being startled and only suppressed the little fantasy her mind was conjuring a few moments earlier.
He didn't answer, instead he started a completely new subject. "The Avatar has been very inactive for the past few weeks, I have noted. I hope that has nothing to do with your captivity traumatizing you."
Korra's eyes narrowed, and she swallowed hard before snapping a response "What am I supposed to do, come hunting for you and your cronies every night?"
After a moment of silence, Amon tilted his head. "I was hoping you would," he said.
Korra's eyes widened in disbelief, hoping that she was just imagining the subliminal message in his words. "...so you can finally be rid of me?"
"Avatar, I told you I was saving you for last," he said. Korra flinched at him, once again, calling him 'Avatar.'
Korra snorted. "You've said a lot of things."
His eyes narrowed at that. "I always keep my word."
Korra rolled her eyes, crossing her arms. "You once told me you would never betray me."
Beneath the mask, his façade cracked. "...I thought we discussed this. Things have grown quite complicated."
"I know, but don't think I will ever believe a word you've ever said. Don't you dare think I'll ever trust you again," she spat. He stepped closer to her.
"Korra," he whispered. Korra's lip trembled as his heady scent grew stronger. "I let you go. I could have kept you imprisoned but... I let you go. Do you have any idea what position that put me in?"
Korra's eyebrows furrowed and she didn't respond.
"My hold and power has grown weaker over the weeks; they doubt me. They wonder why I let the Avatar go when our mission could have been easily accomplished with you... taken care of," he said, his firm voice faltering slightly.
"Then why did you set me free?" she asked weakly.
"Because I said I was saving you for last," he replied. He closed his eyes. "And because I wasn't ready to end you."
Korra shuddered, swallowing hard as she watched him. He seemed sincere, but she still frowned.
"Why are you here?" she growled, stepping closer to him so that she could glare into his crystal blue eyes. "Why are you telling me all of this?"
Like a snake striking, Amon's hand clasped around her jaw, squeezing her chin until she let out a soft whimper. He glared down at Korra, eyes leaking with uncertainty and anger - perhaps at himself. "I will never be ready to end you."
Korra couldn't breath, let alone reply. His words so rough, so desperate, so unlike the man she knew in the Spirit World and the man called Amon. Perhaps he wasn't simple as she thought; there wasn't just black and white to his soul, but a million shades of gray in between. Korra longed to know every part of him, although she knew the consequence of such would probably be both of their ends.
She pictured a field of white consuming the space around her, and him being the only thing that she could see.
Weak. She had no self-control, and as she collapsed into his touch she knew all rational thought had left her then.
"Closure..." she whispered, her mouth feeling dry as her eyes flicked to his.
His mask nodded in agreement, and he leaned in to her. Korra felt a wave passion roll over her, and her softness capsized as she roughly grabbed him by the collar of his suit, pulling him down to her. He caught himself on her waist, crashing into her chest as Korra's lips buried in the hallow beneath his ear. Heart pounding in her ears, she gnawed at his soft, stubble-writhen skin until she heard him growl in disapproval.
Her hands scraped down his stomach, clawing through his layers, until her thumbs were tucked into the waistband of his pants. "How sorry are you?" she growled into his ear, nipping at his lobe as she took it roughly between her teeth. "Do you feel sorrow? Anguish? Do you know how much you've hurt me?"
She fumbled with the buckle of his pants until it clattered to the floor, and they were finally free to fall down - but she was waiting to make that motion. Korra tilted her head to the side, eyebrows pulling together into a grimace. "Do you know how much you've screwed with my head?"
Amon sneered and slid his hands down to her backside, squeezing her cheeks in rough fists. "You're the one that's been fucking with me," he rasped, lifting her feet from the ground a slight moment until she was shoved against the wall. The breath was knocked from Korra's lungs, and her lower region throbbed with a need like she had never felt before. Heat flushed through her, and she wrapped her legs around his waist. Desperately, he ground her into the wall, and she moaned into the base of his throat as the friction made her nerves go haywire.
Korra grabbed him roughly by the neck and tipped his head down to her, her nose becoming flush with his masks', their eyes meeting in a crazy haze of torturous need. She drew a hand across the porcelain cheek before pressing her lips against the smirk. Like in her daydream, lust seeped from her core as she intimately consumed the mask. Amon audibly groaned as her tongue dragged across the cheek, lips sucking at it as she softly mewled.
"Amon," she rasped, looking into his eyes again has her fingers twined themselves in his sideburns. "Are you still going to save me for last?"
He watched her for a moment, but then drove her against the wall again, fluidly ripping the mask from his face and tossing it across the floor. Heatedly he lips buried themselves in hers, the kiss becoming one struggling for dominance. Nothing like the way he kissed her in Damen Shi; it was tinged with confusion and hate, powered by lust that was beginning to consume them both. Korra could feel a bulge grinding between her legs as he pinned his fingers against her throat, tipping her chin up so his tongue could weave its way deeper into her mouth. They wrestled for control, and Korra found herself wanting to give in. No, something roared within her. One hand tangled in his hair, knotting in the strands, while the other traveled between their legs.
Snaking between his crotch, she squeezed his arousal and he hissed feebly into his mouth.
"Stop," he said weakly into her lips. Korra's plan worked, and his ministrations became softer and less intrusive, which gave her the perfect opportunity to attack his mouth. His tongue brushed against hers, and their movements were almost fluid and not like fire. She felt a taste of their first kiss, like two raging rivers meeting and becoming one and not an explosive and destructive competition for control.
The tenderness of it didn't last long; the heat between them was impossible to quench with simple kissing. Korra bit his lip, their noses brushing against each other, and she smiled. "Finish what you started."
She felt a low rumble in his chest as he clawed at her behind, sliding down her blue sweats and pushing them to her ankles. Simultaneously, she undid his pants, his swollen and hard member breaking out of its binds and brushing against her thigh. He shuddered as Korra rubbed against him, and she grinned with victory. In what seemed like a the time of a lightning strike, his erection slid between her folds, causing her to sharply inhale the heavy scent of arousal that hovered around them.
She muffled her approving mewls in the collar of his shirt, taking it roughly between her teeth as he rammed into her. She wove her arms around his waist, so that their clothed chests were flush and she could feel his fluttering heartbeat vibrating against her breasts. Releasing the fabric, she locked eyes with Amon. He wouldn't stop looking at her, as if the pure pleasure that strung across her face was enough to reach his release. His jaw locked in concentration, his eyes mirroring Korra's own anguish and longing as he bent his lips down to her.
Desperate, pleading; he didn't want this to end. Korra lifted herself using his shoulders to get a deeper angle. She tried very hard to sustain her moans, because any minute the other Air Acolytes would be returning to the dormitory and hear her shrieking pleasure. Amon only seemed to revel in her attempts, smiling mischievously against her lips as she hissed into his. He only made it worse by winding his hands beneath his shirt, squeezing her unwrapped breasts roughly until Korra groaned in satisfaction. Quickly, her heart began to thump faster in her chest as heat flushed from her nose to her toes. Amon's grunts became more labored as he filled her, pangning with a near-softness despite him roughly pinning her against the wall.
Korra slowly moved her parted lips over his own, down his cheek and carefully licking the savage scars that netted across them. He choked a moan, both intrigued by the sensitivity of his marred skin and amazed that she wasn't disgusted. He nodded in approval as her tongue tenderly traced the molten skin.
Something was breaking inside both of them, and their hasty movements were synchronizing and becoming increasingly desperate.
She nipped her way up to his ear, running her tongue across the lobe. "I'm so close," she whispered hazily between breaths.
With a few more thrusts, Amon snapped and buried himself in her as deep as he could go, biting into her neck to muffled his cries of pleasure. To make sure she didn't follow far behind, he brought a hand between her thighs and strummed the sensitive bud, and Korra shuddered with both surprise and pleasure as the motion sent her over the edge.
Korra dropped her feet to the ground as she rode out her waves of pleasure, digging her nails into his back as he pressed her head into his chest. Feeling weak, she pushed him towards the bed, knocking him down and collapsing over top of him. She curled into her chest, fleeting and on her high, and nearly forgot it was Amon. Just as she was about to pull away, knowing she was going to meet his cold face, she felt his hand snake around her neck.
A small gasp escaped her lips as she tried to interpret the gesture. His other hand rested on the small of her back. He was holding her; warm and protective, she felt his lips at the top of her hair.
"I'm sorry I've betrayed you Korra," he murmured in a uncharacteristic vulnerable voice. "I am truly sorry."
Korra lifted her head, resting her chin on his chest as she watched him. "I know."
He shook his head. "This has gone to far... I shouldn't have come." He lifted himself up on his elbows, in a motion to leave. Korra took both of her hands and shoved them into his shoulders, violently shaking her head in a firm no.
"You're not going anywhere," she whispered harshly, narrowing her eyes. "Not yet."
Amon's eyes glazed over as Korra lifted herself up, straddling him. Slowly, she stroked a hand down his chest, making his eyebrows raise. Seductively, she undid his tunic in a devious slow motion until his chest was exposed and she was free to trace his muscled abdomen.
"One night with me, and you will never betray me again."
Okay, so this was my shot at hate/fuck and I believe I failed miserably. I'm just too fluffy. But that doesn't rule out rough sex o.0 *fist pump*
