Authors Note: Thanks for the reviews again guys, they really motivate me :) I hope you enjoy this!
p.s sorry for any mistakes
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or it's characters.
Being amoungst a crowd of people can make you feel so insignificant. Santana had always felt that way. But now that she's picturing Brittany being right beside her, everything feels a little more calm. They had shared the morning together before Santana had left for the airport.
Brittany couldn't spend as much time with Santana as she wanted to, but the morning wake up made up for it.
About an hour and a half earlier
"What are you doing here Britt?" Santana asks, wiping sleep from her eyes that are barely open. She didn't sound angry, just surprised.
"I just came to see you before you leave for New York," Brittany replies shyly.
Santana sends her a faint smile before stepping back and allowing her to enter. Brittany plays it cool, figuring that they'd talk, share a kiss and then go seperate ways. Santana on the other hand is feeling a little flushed at the sight of Brittany in such tight shorts and tank top which reveals a satisfactory amount of cleavage.
"Dance class?" Santana asks, finally becoming more awake as she scans the blonde's figure.
"Yeah, we start a little later today, so I thought I'd visit you early," Brittany replies simply, eyeing her own outfit, then smiling up at the brunette.
"My eyes are up here," Brittany adds when she notices that Santana is still focused on her lower area.
"Just appreciating a good looking thing," Santana replies smugly, licking her lips.
Brittany's eyes find the floor, hoping the dusty carpet will allow help her find some sort of witty come back. When she feels a presence descend towards her, she looks up to see Santana standing just mere inches away with a playful grin.
Before Brittany can speak, Santana leaps into her arms, wrapping her legs around the blonde's waist. Brittany instinctively catches the brunette by her thighs so that she doesn't lose balance.
"My god, you are so hot," Brittany says breathlessly.
Santana's grin fades, because Brittany is staring at her with so much adoration and desire that she has to relax for a second to take it all in. She feels herself slipping a little and hoists herself up further, earning a soft grunt from the blonde's lips.
Santana's mouth twitches into a sly smile and Brittany's cheeks resemble a tomato. Santana leans forward, kissing the blonde softly but firmly. Her arms around the blonde's neck tightens so that their kiss is deepened into a fervid kiss.
Brittany allows her tongue to enter Santana's mouth, running along the brunette's and swallowing her moans. Brittany's hands squeeze roughly against the brunette's thighs, causing Santana to arch her back. Brittany can feel her legs shuddering and the wetness in her underwear becomes clear.
Santana pulls back, only to have Brittany's lips attack her neck. The blonde sucks greedily on the skin under her jaw, before nipping at her collarbone. Brittany uses one hand to pull down the strap of Santana's bra so she can kiss the area clean.
Santana throws her head back and lets out a lengthy moan. She can't even decipher if this is really happening. She only woke up 10 minutes ago so it's possible she could still be dreaming. She hears a buzzing coming from beside them but she doesn't dare open her eyes. The way Brittany is kissing her exposed shoulder has her squirming with pleasure.
Then Brittany pulls back reluctantly and tilts her head to the right. Santana's phone is shaking against the kitchen counter. The brunette groans and slides off of Brittany. She walks away to retrieve the device but not before getting her ass slapped by the blonde.
It only makes Santana more sexually frustrated.
She ends the phone call with her boss a minute after answering and notifies Brittany that she has to be leaving soon. With one final passionate kiss, the blonde shuts the door behind her and Santana's left with an empty feeling.
She has never felt this reliant on a person before. It's like her days without Brittany don't seem real, like she's not really living.
These few days away will definitely be rough, but it'll all be worth it when she returns.
The prospect of her and Brittany becoming official when she returns causes a spark inside the brunette's heart. She hadn't thought about it before, but they had definitely crossed the line of friendship. She'll have to ask Brittany when she returns and rid herself of the fear of being left alone again.
Kurt's beside Santana in line, awaiting to drop off their luggage. Santana bites the corner of her lip and scans the room. She doesn't know why, but she's hoping Brittany might crash through the doors, leap into her arms and kiss her senseless. The urge to sprint out of the airport, hail a cab and drive back to Brittany crosses her mind, but she shrugs off the feeling.
She had to gather herself, because this was only going to be a measly two days away. She felt like her heart had been pulled out, placed on a pedestal and been shot at with arrows. All of them missed by an inch, which made everything more excruciating. The arrows resembling the people in her life that could easily break her if they wanted too.
Even them without the knowledge of her and Brittany's relationship, Santana felt vulnerable. She doesn't even know how she managed to act so calm when Brittany was with her in the office so many times. With her there, it felt like no one else was.
Like no one could break what they had, no one but themselves could touch eachother. It was a heavy connection, that weighed about the size of the earth. Her and Brittany were just right when they were together.
A woman's voice echoes through the speakers and Santana jumps a little. "Santana, let's go," Kurt says with a sweet smile.
He ushers her towards the sitting area and they both stand by the window, taking in the incredible view. The sun is bright, the skies are clear and some how every thing feels wierdly comfortable. She feels like her and Brittany are an actual couple, married, with a child on the way. She's just going to away on a business trip for a few days and when she returns, Brittany will be waiting for her.
She remembers the blonde saying that she'll be there when Santana gets back. This rids her of her nerves and allows her to feel giddy inside.
"What are you thinking about doll?" Kurt asks, with his head resting against the glass.
Santana turns to him, mirroring his actions. She raises a hand, brushing it across his slightly reddened cheek. "Life," She replies with a shrug of her shoulders.
Kurt breathes a laugh through his nose as his eyes meet the floor. "Life," He repeats, shaking his head. "Everybody dies by not everybody lives," He adds, locking gaze with the brunette.
Santana goes over his words. Too long has she been reluctant to give herself completely to anyone. She hadn't given herself the opportunity even though there were many in high school. She's finally beginning to shake away the regret of the past and begins thinking about her life now. She's happy, she's met someone incredible, all she needs is to make the right decisions from here on - concerning her parents, her colleagues, her boss.
She needs to let them know how happy she is with her life at the moment. She's thinking this, because if Kurt heard her, he'd probably tell her that she doesn't have to prove anything to anybody. But people around her already have this specific view on her.
Her parents think she's still depressed because she doesn't visit often and her colleagues think she's a closed off workaholic. She can't believe that the only person that really knows her well and actually took the time to know her is an 18 year old girl with an extraordinary outlook on life.
With one blink, she feels a single tear slither down her cheek. At first she doesn't realise because she continues to let her mind wander. But then she notices Kurt rummage through his carry on bag and pull out a small packet of tissues.
Santana smiles thankfully, feeling a little embarrassed. She notices the people around her, gathering their bags and heading towards the entrance at the terminal.
Santana asks for the window seat and Kurt happily obliges. She wills herself to fall asleep until they arrive at New York. After the safety precautions are announced by the flight attendants, Santana allows her eyes to shut.
Upon arriving at their hotel in New York, Kurt and Santana are greeted with a message from the gentlemen they'd be meeting with in an hour. They had to shower and get changed into somthing that would make a good impression because apparently these guys could tear down a business like that.
She's thinking of giving Brittany a quick call, but Kurt is rushing around, throwing make up at her that she's finding it hard to retrieve her phone. So Santana decides she'll try later and catches up with Kurt before he can shut the bathroom door.
15 minutes into the meeting and Santana can feel her palms sweating. She wipes them on either side of her cream skirt and attempts to keep her focus on what one of the men are showing them all on the white board.
Now Santana's thinking about Brittany's hands on her skirt, her thighs, her waist. She chuckles nervously when every one around her laughs aswell. Apparently the statistics of last months sales compared to this months are hilarious.
There's a sudden vibration in her pocket, which luckily only she can hear. She studies each of the men around her whose glances are fixed forward. Luckily she's furthest towards the back of the room so she carefully pulls her phone out.
I miss you so much, I wish you could be lying with me right now xxx
The corners of the brunette's lips curl up slowly and her eyes slowly close then open. Oh how she'd love to be lying next to, on top of, whatever, with Brittany aswell. She looks toward her, observing how the men are so entranced with what's written in front of them. She knows in a few minutes, the men will call her and Kurt up to present something. She's just hoping the time goes fast so she can be back in her hotel room to call Brittany.
Then there's another vibration. She lifts her phone up, not before checking to see if the men are watching. Luckily they're still staring forward, so she opens the new text.
You're probably in a meeting right now. You're probably really bored and I wish I could be there to make you feel less bored... I wish I was there so I could lift you up on the table and grind against you. I need to feel you again so bad Santana, this time with less clothing xxx
While reading the slightly erotic text, Santana feels her skin burning. It's literally becoming an oven in here, and it's mostly due to what Brittany had revealed via text.
Santana stands abruptly, excusing herself for a moment and thankfully none of the men question her sudden actions. She heads for the bathroom and when she enters, she finds an empty cubicle and locks the door as fast as she can.
She dials Brittany's number and waits for an answer. It only takes two rings for the blonde to let out a husky hello. Santana's eyes roll back into her head and she rests her back against the wall.
"Brittany," Santana whimpers.
"I'm guessing you liked my text," The blonde replies smugly. Santana grazes her lips with her tongue, then swallows hard.
"T-tell me again," Santana pleads. She tries to stay as quiet as possible incase anyone walks in and observes her having phone sex.
"You sound desperate," Brittany giggles. Santana hums in response, shutting her eyes and awaiting the blonde's words. You're in need of a touch and if it can't be hers you'll settle for your own. It's been one fucking day and you're so desperate for Brittany again.
She hears Brittany clear her throat and Santana props one leg up onto the toilet seat. She can't believe that she and Brittany hadn't touched eachother down there yet, it was almost as if they were one of those married couples saving themselves. Maybe inside they felt that they were actually trying to wait for the right time to make love.
"Well," Her voice is an octave lower than normal. "I'd spread your legs and run my hands down your chest and stomach. I'd kiss your neck lightly, until I hear you moan, then I'll start biting. My hands will rest on your inner thighs, tickling the skin there to tease you. My tongue will tease your nipples through your shirt for a while. After I hear your final plea, one of my hands will slide into your underwear until I reach your sweet spot. You'll arch your back and I'll lift your shirt up to press kisses to your chest and stomach. Two of my fingers will enter you and you'll scream, then I'll li-"
"Ugh," Santana groans loudly. She slides her fingers inside of her and out while Brittany explains. At this point she doesn't care if people hear her, she just needs to relieve herself from the throbbing between her legs.
"Stop touching yourself," Brittany deadpans. Santana's eyes widen and she slowly removes her fingers. She hears silence on the other end and wonders if Brittany is touching herself aswell.
"Britt-"
"Taste them, taste your fingers," Brittany orders quietly.
Right now at this very moment, Santana feels like she's about to explode. Brittany has such an intense effect on her that she adores and hates at the same time. She had never felt so much pleasure between her legs when she was simply touching herself. With Brittany giving her orders, it made her day much more interesting.
Santana exits the bathroom, looking left and right nervously incase anybody notices how flushed she is. In the meeting room Kurt is sorting out some papers and Santana's thankful that she makes it in time to present.
She doesn't know how long she was in the bathroom for. She had never tasted herself after she touched that area. This was different however, Brittany was telling her too. She couldn't help but picture the blonde taking her fingers in her mouth right after she touched Santana. It causes the sting between her thighs to erupt again then settle back down.
She flattens out her shirt and joins Kurt in front of the room, just hoping that this meeting will be over fast so she'll be able to rest and then head back to Brittany tomorrow afternoon.
Kurt and Santana decided to go out for dinner that night, somewhere nearby their hotel. They return after a few drinks, not interested in getting completely wasted. They head out to the balcony, pulling out a few chairs and enjoying the night breeze. Kurt pulls out a cigarette, offering one to Santana but she kindly declines.
"You really quit huh?" Kurt asks with the filter between his lips.
"I quit when I fell pregnant and I never felt the need to start again," Santana replies nonchalantly. Kurt nods in reply, but doesn't push the sore subject any further.
They both lean back in their chairs, propping their feet up on the balcony's ledge.
"You know sweetie, I don't think anyone will care about you and Brittany," He says, causing Santana to twist her body to face him. His gaze is fixed on the sky as he speaks and Santana can't help but adore Kurt. He's so full of wisdom and inspiration, she doesn't know why she didn't tell him sooner.
"They might not show that they care, but behind my bac-"
"Santana, whether they're talking to your face or behind your back, it shouldn't matter. It shouldn't effect you as long as you're happy with your life. What people say and what you feel are completely different. It doesn't matter whether they judge you for dating a high school girl, it only matters that you feel great for the first time in a long time and they have to respect that," Kurt explains, taking a long drag afterwards.
Santana sighs and leans her head on her hands. "You're wonderful Kurt, you know that?" She says with a sincere grin.
"And you're nicer than you think Santana," Kurt replies, winking at her then staring up towards the squid inked sky. Santana follows his gaze and loses herself in the stars. There's something about sitting outside at night and analysing your whole life. Santana always did it as a child, but never in a million years did she think she'd end up where she is now.
It's the next day, around 6:30 at night, when Kurt and Santana arrive back home. Their day was filled with more meetings and presentations, hoping that they'd make a good impression and represent their company well.
Santana places her luggage beside her bed, calls her boss to let him know their trip was a success and decides to head out for the night. Mr. Pierce was at work when Santana called him, so she decides it would be okay to visit Brittany at home for a little while.
She grabs her coat and keys, before shutting the door behind her.
The traffic isn't too bad and Santana's at Brittany's door step in no time. With a few quiet raps at the door she hears shuffling inside then footsteps close to the door. Brittany opens the door slightly, her eyes widening with a look of something the brunette can't decipher.
"Britt!" One of the girls squeal as her friends pile into the house. Brittany's taken by surprise at first, but knows all her friends are responsible enough and will only stay for an hour at least.
Luckily her dad had to work late and won't come home for a while. Brittany notices Caleb, he looks more sober than the others, but still heavily tipsy.
"You're going to drink right?" One of her friends asks and she can't help but hesitate. She knows that Santana's supposed to be getting home anyday now and doesn't want to wake up with a hang over if she calls in the morning. But then again, she wants to enjoy time with her friends because it has been a while since they got together like this.
She takes the bottle of passion pop, chugging it down in heavy gulps. Her friends look on wide eyed, but throw their hands up and cheer when Brittany raises the bottle.
About half an hour passes and Brittany can feel a knot in her stomach. She feels as though she's going to vomit, but takes a seat on the empty couch to gather herself.
She feels the weight on the sofa change and a body shifts next to her. A hot breath is in her ear, but she's in no mood unless it's Santana's.
"What's going on with us?" Caleb questions, placing a hand on the blonde's knee.
"Nothinggg," She shrugs his hand off with a scowl on her face. "We wrn't eeeven together in the f-first place and I just - I just don't want this anymore," She slurrs, sloppily using her finger to point between herself and him.
"But this is all so sudden baby," He whines. "We were doing fiiiine before," He runs his hand through his hair and slides closer to the blonde who is now pressed against the arm of the sofa. "Is there someone else?" He questions, squeezing her thigh firmly.
Brittany stiffens, unable to figure out if she should just be honest or lie. She can't think properly right now, let alone find words. She knows she can't tell him exactly who it is, because it's none of his business.
Her head is throbbing and she feels as though she's going to gag at any moment.
"Yeah, I dunno," Brittany mutters. "I j-just know I don't wanna see you annnmorre," She slurrs.
Caleb clenches his jaw but doesn't voice his opinion. The next thing they hear is a few knocks on the front door and Brittany pushes Caleb away to stand up. She then stumbles towards the piercing noise.
"Santana," Brittany deadpans. She turns her head to see Caleb still sitting on the couch, muttering something to himself.
Santana scrunches her eyebrows at the blonde's strange actions. "Is this a bad time?" She questions, with an eyebrow raised.
Brittany's awkwardly shoved aside by another person and her friends all pile out of the house. Caleb appears beside the blonde, wrapping his arms around her waist and placing a sloppy kiss on her cheek.
"I'll see you at school I guess," He mutters sadly and strides past Santana without acknowledging her. Santana sucks in her lips, feeling an unbearable pressure weighing her down.
Santana notices how tense Brittany is, like she's just been caught with the weapon in her right hand and crimson blood covering her left. Brittany's head still feels like it's being possessed by thunder. She needs to steady herself and explain everything to the brunette.
However Santana's already rushing away before she can get a word out.
"Santana!" Brittany yells, her vision becoming blurry from the oncoming tears. She struggles to keep her footing on the uneven grass.
Santana halts, turns around and meets the blonde's gaze. There is complete fury and pain etched in the brunette's stare. She doesn't even know what to say or whether she should just leave.
"Weee j-just talked Sntaan-a," Brittany says through free flowing tears. She tries to wipe some away, only allowing more to fall down her cheeks.
"No!" Santana replies harshly. "I'm gone for not even two days and return to find you with him, not to mention drunk! The guy that's been such an asshole to you," Santana spits. Her vision is starting to become blurry aswell, as tears form in her eyes. She tries to hold them back so she can speak clearly, but her breath quickens and it's too late. She's sobbing and inhaling fast, erratic breaths. She can't steady herself and when Brittany reaches forward she stumbles back.
"Don't!" Santana hisses, balancing herself. "Why the hell did I even think this would work between us? I knew I'd just be left broken again," Her breath hitches. "We just have to find someone our o-own age," Santana states, almost regretting her words when she sees the pain cross Brittany's face. But she doesn't regret it, she can't. Brittany's breaking her heart.
"No Santana!" Brittany finally finds her voice. "I don't want anyone e-else, I just want youuu!" She takes a tentative step forward but falls to her knees. "You have no idea how much you mean to me," She sobs, balling her fists into the grass surrounding her. "I told C-caleb that nothings going on between us!"
Santana scoffs, "Yeah when he wrapped his arms around you and kissed your cheek, that looked like nothing."
"Fuck," Brittany hisses, lifting her head up and screaming to the sky. The mixture of alcohol and causing Santana pain is getting her so worked up. If it was anyone else that was hurt by her actions, she'd wait a few days until giving them a brief apology. But it's Santana she's hurting and she feels the need to explain herself right away.
"What the hell are we Brittany? I thought about you this whole trip, about whether I'd ask if you wanted to be official," She inhales deeply through her nose. "We can't be friends, because friends don't do what we do. But then again you're still in high school and figuring yourself out. Why did I even think you'd want to settle down with me at your age, I'm so stupid," She scolds herself.
Brittany squeezes her eyes shut, forcing herself to swallow the boulder that's lodged in her throat. She opens her eyes to see Santana's head down and her arms hugging her body. She doesn't know how to prove herself, because her mother had always given her advice when it came to situations like this. But then again, Brittany's never been in this situation before. Never has she cared so much for another person, that she'd lay her heart on the line and plead for them to forgive her.
"San..." Brittany whimpers, crawling forward and tugging the brunette's jeans. The brunette stares down at her, through hooded eyes, observing how desperate Brittany looks right now. She can't bare to see her like this, so she bites her lip hard and shuts her eyes.
"You're upset," Brittany mutters through sobs. "Pleeease don't say anything else you'll re-gret tomorrow, because you know e-exactly what we are and you know how I feel about you San-tanaa," She adds, desperately clinging to Santana as though she won't be able to survive if she lets go.
She's so tired, so drained. She wants to curl up in a warm bed and leave this until the morning where they can actually talk like without the influence of alcohol or a broken heart. The words Santana said hurt, ofcourse, but she never thought for one second that Santana meant them.
She stands up slowly, curling her fingers over Santana's arms. She then tilts her head down so her lips meet Santana's cheek. She feels her tears against her lips and doesn't want to ever pull away. But she knows it's for the best and she staggers back inside to let Santana clear her head.
So much drama D: Sorry if that upset anyone, but you know every relationship has it's ups and downs. Did Santana over react a little? Or did she have a right too?
Let me know what you think as always :)
