Guess what I found floating around in internet-land?
That's right. The Sword in the Stone… And by that I don't mean the actual sword, I mean the episodes. Parts 1 and 2!
Promised you that I'd write up these episodes as soon as I found them. It's just taken me longer than I would have liked, but hey, at least I'm completing this series before series five starts (on which note: Series 5 trailer = AWESOME. WANT. NOW.)
Yeah. I'm back ;)
The Sword in the Stone - Part One.
I – Arthur's preening in front of a mirror, because… yeah
I think something might be wrong with his hair, possibly. I dunno, it just looks different. He's also pulling lots of faces.
MERLIN You have to look kingly for the feast of… Yeah, the feast. We have feasts in Camelot all the time, does it really have to have a name to give us an excuse? Really?
ARTHUR I'm hardly going to look kingly in my undergarments
You're not even wearing your undergarments, unless for some reason your undergarments are made of chainmail, Arthur. And that would just be uncomfortable.
MERLIN *hiding something*
ARTHUR What have you got there?
MERLIN Nothing. My hand. My other hand.
Lol, Merlin is a troll. An adorable troll. They are a rare breed.
ARTHUR *walks away from camera and is wearing no trousers*
Well, that explains everything.
*stares for a bit*
And then, because we don't have enough irony in this show already, Merlin mentions that he's very good at keeping secrets. And the writers once again tease us mercilessly by making us think that maybe this time he's going to have his warlock-ness revealed (spoiler: it doesn't happen).
Meanwhile, in the land of not-so-whimsical: Agravaine is making smokebombs to get past some guards.
AGRAVAINE Well, at the rate that Camelot loses guards, I hardly doubt anybody will notice these two dropping. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got some fire messages to deliver. Could have used giant flags or something, but whatever…
Suspicious!Arthur is suspicious.
ARTHUR Have you seen Agravaine?
GAIUS Don't ask me. He's your randomly-unexplained-evil-uncle-character, how am I supposed to keep track of his sudden, unexplained appearances and disappearances?
ARTHUR Meh, whatevs. Ah, food. Yay!
MERLIN *le giggle* Easy now, we don't want any more holes in that belt
SIR JEFF *actual spittake*
ARTHUR Well, it's a good job you don't have any actually important secrets or anything
GOD DAMMIT IRONY!
Okay, and can we stop cutting between the whimsical feast with happy music and troll!Merlin and the 'omg ominous' scenes with Agravaine evil strutting around everywhere and for some reason they have some kind of aversion to showing his face actually on camera. Well, until he gets to the end of those tunnels.
AGRAVAINE Hey guys. Yeah, just forget about being subtle, carrying all those torches and stuff. Anyway, come on in, there's a party going on upstairs.
And then he ominously struts through the tunnels. Like a boss.
Sir Jeff is flirting. This makes Arthur sad, because Guinevere and stuff.
MERLIN Are you sad because Guinevere and stuff
ARTHUR NO SHIT!
And more guards are dying and the evil armies of evil are lighting everything on fire using… well, I'm guessing it isn't petrol, seeing as this is the dark ages and all that.
AGRAVAINE *casual strut of casualness* Cool guys don't look at explosions…
Meanwhile (we're having a lot of meanwhiles, and we're not even five minutes in) Morgana is watching. Because ominous.
HELIOS Hey, who'd have thought that after all those attempts to take over Camelot through monsters and trying to manipulate the queen of a totally different kingdom and brainwashing Merlin and Lancelot and stuff didn't work, all you needed was to just walk in through some tunnels? Crazy, huh?
MORGANA The fire is preeeetty.
That's enough ominousness than you could shake a stick at, so let's have some (dun dun dun) Opening credits!
II – Everything has gone to crazy in about five seconds
SIR LEON Well, this sucks
INVADING ARMIES OF EVIL Raaaaaaaarrrrrrgggh!
ELYAN Yup.
In the great hall:
GWAINE Sire, you might be interested to know that we're under attack
ARTHUR Oh, so that's what all the fire and screaming was about. That makes sense now. *table jump* TO AWESOME!
Elyan has found Agravaine, and because he is still Mister-Common-Sense, he's doing the sensible thing.
ELYAN I knew there was something funny about you ever since you just randomly turned up without any explanation! So, you die now, right?
AGRAVAINE I got two swords though
MORGANA And I got magic!
ELYAN *flying through the air* Oh craaaaaaaaaaaaaaap! *unconscious*
You'll be pleased to know that Morgana still has Bellatrix LeStrange hair and makes evil faces.
MORGANA We don't have time to play soldiers, Agravaine *strides off* *sigh* Agravaine. More like Aggravating, AmIright?
(all credit for that joke goes to tumblr)
In the hall:
GAIUS I can't believe this! After all that work Morgana went to brainwashing you and trying to take over Camelot using monsters and stuff failed, now she goes through some tunnels and all of a sudden we're losing? How does that even work?
And Merlin just runs off. Because apparently finding Arthur is more important right now than helping Gaius with the injured people. Then again, maybe he's just given up on trying to save the redshirts, there really doesn't seem to be much point.
Not that I think Arthur really needs help, he's 300-ing his way through the enemy soldiers quite nicely, there.
ARTHUR *slo-mo* I'm awesoooooooome!
EVIL SOLIDER Sword!
ARTHUR Or not. Ow!
But he recovers. Merlin doesn't even have to use his magic to get rid of the enemy with Arthur somehow completely not noticing. That's a first.
MERLIN Magic wall flamethrowers!
Well, it was nice while it lasted.
ARTHUR What was that you were just saying when you stuck your head round the corner
MERLIN Nothing at all, now run!
And then they see Morgana walk past with Agravaine and Helios and stuff in slow motion and it's all very sad and poignant because betrayal.
(also, Sir Leon getting everybody out is awesome sauce)
III – Morgana is lounging.
Well, she has just won. I think she's entitled to a bit of an evil lounge in a throne.
Also, excuse me for possibly getting a bit distracted, because The Hollow Crown (four Shakespeare history plays were adapted by the BBC and they were all awesome as all hell, but Sherlock series 2 is still the best thing that's been on TV so far this year, sorry Shakespeare) was on the other week and I swear that every other castle set they used was the interior of Camelot. Like this great hall, for example. Not to mention when they actual used Pierrefonds castle as an establishing shot, but that's another matter entirely.
Tangent over.
(Tangent might have been caused by Tom Hiddleston being in three of those plays and Morgana is really reminding me of Loki right about now… I'll shut up)
HELIOS We won and stuff
MORGANA Yeah, whatever. Taking Camelot was the easy part. Seriously, your sleeveless armour really isn't as cool as Sir Jeff's. You should think about chainmail.
HELIOS Easy? That doesn't explain why you failed at it so many times these past two series
MORGANA Am I going to have to magically throw you into a wall? I want Arthur.
You really didn't have to say it quite like that. That tone of voice was just creepy with its implications.
MORGANA Where is he?
HELIOS In the palace. There's no way out*lets Morgana walk off* Heh, heh, heh *evil smirk*
MORGANA STOP THAT EVIL SMIRKING AT ONCE! THAT'S MY JOB!
Meanwhile (need to stop saying that) Gwaine and Sir Jeff let us know that wooden doors are extremely good at soundproofing the horrible sounds of battle from the room you've made into an improvised hospital. Also, all hope is lost, etc. etc.
MERLIN I have le plan. But we need to drug Arthur. You got anything, Gaius?
GAIUS Erm, no. Can you stop forgetting that you're a wizard at moments where it would really be useful?
MERLIN Well, there is that. *teh magics*
And the effect is that Arthur is suddenly high. Possibly. And so many awkward looks were exchanged between the knights that day.
GAWAINE I'm gonna go be a hero now. Good luck, my vest-wearing friend. Now bugger off, Merlin
MERLIN I thought having the hero complex was my job. Or possibly Harry Potter's… *buggers off*
And then Gaius and Gwaine faced the doors as the enemy armies broke in and it was kind of badass but in a very strange way.
MORGANA Where's Arthur?
GAIUS Not here. Soooo… In your face.
MORGANA DO I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING MYSELF?
IV – Don't ask me how Arthur, Merlin and Jeff got out of Camelot
Just… don't. Cause I don't know.
And yeah, Arthur is definitely high right now.
ELYAN Surprise attack!
SIR JEFF ARGH! Oh, wait, it's you.
ARTHUR *stares at burning Camelot*
MERLIN Come on, Arthur
ARTHUR The fire's preeeeeeety…
Luckily, Merlin has a plan, to go to Ealdor, because if you're like me and sad, you remember silly little details from way back in series one where Uther wouldn't go and help out because Ealdor is in a different kingdom! Yay! Not luckily, Merlin can hear horses. So don't just stop, you silly people! Run for it!
SIR JEFF Run for it!
Thank you!
The horses are in slow motion anyway, so it isn't like they're going to have to run very fast…
Morgana's evil magic eyes look really evil. And Arthur's cape as he's being thrown around by magic is huge.
Luckily, Merlin's been knocked down by magic so many times that it doesn't affect him anymore, and off they run again. Except for Sir Jeff.
ELYAN My turn to have the hero complex. Run away, Merlin, I'll hold off the guards
MERLIN I thought you were supposed to be Mister common sense… But, okay, I guess *runs*
ELYAN Well, I'm probably going to be captured. I wonder why all these enemy soldiers have Dread Pirate Roberts bandanas on their heads? Meh *swords*
In the relative safety of… some other part of the forest (okay, is it just me, or is this episode really misty?) Arthur is acting strangely. I mean, he's actually apologising for things and trusting Merlin. Merlin isn't sure whether to be suspicious about this or enjoy it.
MERLIN Well, he's high. If it doesn't go away, I'll just abuse the hell out of it later
V – Morgana got back from that hunt fairly quickly. And yup, still throne-lounging
Smug!Agravaine struts and is smug. Smug!Helios is leaning on the throne, smugly.
AGRAVAINE Sup, Helios, I'm smug
HELIOS Bitch, whatever
I don't think they like each other much.
MORGANA Erm, hello. I'd like to remind you that I'm the Queen here. Oh, and I'm evil aren't I? So… burn the crops or something until the people decide that they like me better than Arthur.
AGRAVAINE'S INNER POLITICIAN *facepalm*
HELIOS Don't be like that, Agravaine. It's like Rule 23 of screenwriting: evil rulers have to burn crops to get people to co-operate.
Oh, and Elyan's been captured. Whatever happened to Sir Jeff shall remain unexplained.
MORGANA We'll find Arthur soon enough
…
ELYAN Hey, don't look at me with your torture implications. I just fought off some Dread Pirate Roberts mooks for a while to give Arthur time to get away; I don't have a clue where he's gone
MORGANA EVIL HONEY BADGER DON'T CARE!
VI – Rule 37 of screenwriting: When your protagonists are in trouble/on the run and need a disguise, it is perfectly morally acceptable to steal clothes from washing lines.
Rule 38 of screenwriting: These clothes will never fit properly
MERLIN Wow. You look like a turniphead, and yes, that is now a word *totally anticipating a smack*
ARTHUR Oh. Well, that's a shame *doesn't smack*
MERLIN … I am totally going to abuse this for all its worth :D *steals Arthur's gold*
Oh dammit, if it's going to keep mood whiplashing back and forth between silly Arthur and Merlin scenes and Morgana being evil and torturing people, I'm going to run out of scene divisions!
MORGANA Do you know what this is?
AGRAVAINE Another not!Hydra?
HELIOS The world's cutest torture device?
ELYAN Some CGI?
MORGANA No, sillies! It's a Nathair!
I actually had to go and look up how to spell that on the Merlin wiki. CAN'T YOU JUST CALL IT A SNAKE?
MORGANA From the mountains of Asgard
Okay, I have to have misheard that.
No, I'm not going to go back to find out what she actually said. :)
MORGANA With a bit of persuasion it can cause a man pain beyond all imagining
… Where are you going to put that thing, Morgana?
MORGANA So, you'll tell me where Arthur is, y/y?
Elyan may be Mister Common Sense, but he is also a knight of the round table, which makes him Mister Loyalty as well. And, as pointed out previously, he doesn't know Arthur's exact location anyway. And Morgana has crazy eyes. Yup, she's taken a swan dive right off the sanity cliff.
MORGANA Oh good! HORRIFIC OFFSCREEN PAIN TIME!
ELYAN DID NOT THINK THIS THROUGH! OWWWWWWWW!
HELIOS AND AGRAVAINE … Sooooo, would now be a good time for pudding?
*unspecified amount of time later*
ELYAN STILL IN UMIMAGINABLE PAIN HERE!
HELIOS Om nom nom nom food
AGRAVAINE … well this is just awkward
Oh, here's Morgana. That should make things less awkward.
MORGANA Arthur's going to Ealdor
Oh yeah, Merlin did mention that in front of Elyan, didn't he? Obviously the whole self-preservation part of common sense kicked in for Elyan.
MORGANA Oh, and fail me again Agravaine, and I will bring the pain.
…
Yup, she's lost it.
AGRAVANE … But what did I do?
In the dungeons, at least Gaius and Gwaine get to share so they don't go mad from isolation or anything. Oh, and here's Elyan to join them.
ELYAN ….
GWAINE That's bad, right?
GAIUS Damn Nathair serpants
GWAINE What in even the hell?
ELYAN …..
VII – Well, at least Morgana's taking the paperwork part of this Queen job seriously
Oh, here's Agravaine. Want to place your bets on the likelihood that he's here to grovel?
MORGANA What are you still doing here? Bugger off and bring me back Arthur's head on a stick, k thanks bye.
AGRAVAINE Erm…
MORGANA *le evil glare*
AGRAVAINE I just wanted to say goodbye
MORGANA Well, that was unexpected. So, you said goodbye. Look, if you're expecting sympathy from the audience now then you're really not getting the whole evil-bastard thing
AGRAVAINE Just… take care
I can't decide if he meant to say that honestly or as a threat
MORGANA What have I to fear?
*facepalm* Don't say that, Morgana, it's pretty much guaranteed that you're going to fail now. Not that you have much chance of holding onto that crown of yours in the first place.
MORGANA *sassy face* So, I can't trust anyone except you, can I?
AGRAVAINE I am your one true…
O_o I'm not sure I like where this is going…
AGRAVAINE … ally
Oh, phew *sigh of relief*
AGRAVAINE I would do anything for you!
MORGANA *eyeroll* Then go and find Arthur and you can stay at my side and protect me all you like.
AGRAVAINE Good… So… I'll be off then *leaves awkwardly*
…
MORGANA Wow, even I found that creepy
VIII –MORE SLOW MOTION ARMIES OF DOOOOOOOOM!
And now we return to your regularly scheduled Merlin and Arthur banter.
High!Arthur is busy being adorable and doing little bouncy dances like a crazy person
MERLIN Wait. Here.
HIGH!ARTHUR *does not wait*
Well, he's a Doctor Who companion in the making!
Merlin has found a caravan. And a sword has found Merlin.
Oh, it's a woman dressed in something completely anachronistic! Yay! Oh, and for those of you playing the Doctor-Who-actors-who-have-appeared-in-Merlin drinking game (that haven't already died), take a shot. I personally go for espressos of Destiny (I'm joking). (This woman was Tallulah the showgirl from the Daleks in Manhattan episodes, by the way. I literally only worked this out about a month ago.)
ANACHRONISTICALLY-DRESSED WOMAN Hey, Epic Trenchcoat Man! I found some lurkers lurking about
EPIC TRENCHCOAT MAN *throws knives at random* You shouldn't lurk where you aren't wanted, boy!
MERLIN Hey! I'm not a boy, I'm a man now! The great dragon says so in his narration at the start of every episode!
EPIC TRENCHCOAT MAN Wow, you two aren't suspicious at all
MERLIN … Nor are you
EPIC TRENCHCOAT MAN So who's the guy with the face and hair and blue eyes just like the King's?
MERLIN Meh. Just some clotpole
EPIC TRENCHCOAT MAN Go away.
Merlin, however, spots a free ride when he sees it and requests that he and Arthur tag along. After all, he'd be greatful for the company
HIGH!ARTHUR I'm very annoying.
EHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE!
What?
EPIC TRENCHCOAT MAN Bugger off
MERLIN Okay, fine, not a free ride. I do have gold
ANACHRONISTCALLY DRESSED WOMAN *suddenly interested*
EPIC TRENCHCOAT MAN Oh fine!
HIGH!ARTHUR *grins like an idiot*
The bad news: Agravaine has found Arthur's changing spot and is on the trail.
The, erm, other news: Epic Trenchcoat Man and Anachronistically-Dressed Woman flirt like teenagers, Arthur has legs and also he likes to hug trees. Because… high. *shrugs* And, as per usual, Merlin can't keep his nose out of other people's business. Literally, in fact.
MERLIN I smell frankincense!
ANACHRONASTICALLY DRESSED WOMAN I still have a sword, you know
EPIC TRENCHCOAT MAN So keep out of our smuggling business
MERLIN But… illegal
EPIC TRENCHCOAT MAN Bitch, we're Tristan and Isolde. We don't know the meaning of the word "caught"
EVERYONE WHO HAS EVER STUDIED ARTHURIAN LORE EVER And you don't know the meaning of the names Tristan and Isolde, but we're going to let it slide because you are kind of badass.
TRISTAN It's the trenchcoat. Everyone loves the trenchcoat
ISOLDE And the leather. And the sword.
TRISTAN Those too.
MERLIN Kinky
TRISTAN So lol at you, and lol at the halfwit king
HIGH!ARTHUR *knocking on a tree* Hello? Anyone home?
(sidenote: ME WHEN I FIRST SAW THIS EPISODE Oh, so that's how you pronounce Isolde!)
Later that night, Merlin and high!Arthur are sitting by the fireside, so it must be time for a meaningful conversation. Or Merlin berating high!Arthur about being rude and how hard he works. Which is kind of meaningful. And also kind of adorable.
MERLIN Well, might as well start abusing this power I have whilst Arthur is high :D
And he did. And he lolled.
IX – Agravaine and the Dread Pirate Roberts Mooks, riding through the forest (Oo-de-lally, oo-de-lally, golly what a day)
ARTHUR WHY AM I DRESSED LIKE AN IDIOT?
MERLIN Oh dammit, you're not high anymore, are you?
ARTHUR … What?
Merlin gives the quickest explanation of what's been going on ever. Arthur takes it rather well.
ARTHUR SMUGGLERS?
MERLIN *inner facepalm*Listen, just trust me and keep in character
ARTHUR Character? What character?
TRISTAN Morning Merlin! Morning simpleton! *waves*
ARTHUR …
MERLIN *innocent smile*
ARTHUR I am never getting high ever again.
Then there is possible innuendo with a sword which is probably unintentional but I gigglesnorted anyway. It involves Tristan using the phrase "impressive piece". And Arthur doing a bad accent. And suspicious!Tristan being suspicious
MERLIN I totally won that royal sword in a card game. Neat, huh?
TRISTAN Would now be a good time to mention that I hate all knights of Camelot. Like, a lot?
MERLIN Erm…
ARTHUR *hugs sword*Please tell me we don't have to keep this up much longer
Well, that sounds to me like a cue for A BATTLE OF BATTLENESS! And the enemy have arrows.
TRISTAN Crap! They've got arrows so badass they make crazy loud noises when they go past. All named characters behind the smuggling cart!
ISOLDE With any luck, they'll mistake it for a tree and shoot it instead of us!
ARTHUR Well, screw the cover ups. Go hide behind some real trees, then you're guaranteed safety.
MERLIN What do we do?
ARTHUR We use crossbows. Long distance range, and the chosen weapon of 2012, if Katniss, Hawkeye and Princess Merida are anything to go by.
MERLIN Is now really the time to be thinking about jumping on bandwagons, sire?
ARTHUR Just kill some Dread Pirate Roberts mooks, Merlin, and shut up. Now run awaaaaaay!
They run awaaaaaay into the forest, just in time for Agravaine to turn up and make "where in the hell did they go?" faces.
TRISTAN Can someone kindly explain what in the name of Dobby's socks is going on?
ARTHUR I'm the king, that's my evil uncle and my evil sister is currently lounging on my throne because she does that.
MERLIN As fascinating as your little political argument about taxes is, don't you think this would be a good time to run awaaaaay some more?
Or, indeed, have more battles. And Arthur really doesn't look half as badass as usual in those non-fitting clothes. Someone find him his chainmail, quickly.
ISOLDE Badass action woman to the rescue!
MOOK *sword*
ISOLDE Or not. Damn, I did not think this outfit through
ARTHUR *swords mook in the back* Yeah, you should really invest in some armour.
Tristan then slow-motions towards Isolde and has a meaningful conversation with her about how they are partners for life and stuff.
ISOLDE Please stop it. I'm not dead yet, you know
MERLIN You know, maybe we should continue to run awaaaaaay
TRISTAN BUT MY DARLING ISOLDE IS DYING IN MY ARMS AND I DON'T WANT HER TO DIIIIIE!
ARTHUR She isn't dying, you idiot, let's go to Ealdor and get her fixed up
ISOLDE He has a point you know
TRISTAN Oh fine.
X – Whilst we're talking about royalty bringing misery, who wants to see Morgana bring the creepy some more?
I know I do!
Gaius is looking incredibly casual, leaning against that wall, for someone who is starving to death in a dungeon. Gwaine, not so much.
ELYAN …..
Gwaine, having elected himself speaker of the prison cell, goes to face down Morgana through the bars. It is going to be like a faceoff of snark-ism. In Irish.
GWAINE So, if I play the 'please feed us or Gaius will die' nobility card, will it work?
MORGANA Awww! You're adorable! And handsome
And thus, another pairing was born.
MORGANA Sure, you'll have some supper. As long as you're prepared to sing for it
FANGIRLS GWAINE IS GONNA SING?
XII – The border between Camelot and Lot's kingdom.
Because it isn't easy to confuse those names, or anything. Also, I thought that Ealdor was in Cenred's kingdom? Then again, seeing as Morgause killed Cenred, maybe Lot is the guy that took over.
ARTHUR Ealdor is just over that valley! Isn't that great, we just have to make the injured woman trek for another half a day until we make it to medical help!
MERLIN Yeah, it should be a piece of cake after those mountains we went through! Let's rest here for the night, I'll go get a fire to keep Isolde warm in those anachronistically skimpy clothes.
ISOLDE yaaaaay.
Also, Tristan is not Mister Common Sense, because he is apparently so anti-king that he won't even take water from Arthur.
ARTHUR I'm not sure whether to be offended or just facepalm.
Meanwhile, it becomes clear that Morgana isn't going to make Gwaine actually sing.
FANGIRLS *disappointed*
Instead, she's set up her own makeshift gladiator tournament in her throne room, because hey, being an evil queen and not having gone hunting after her kingly brother herself, she needs some form of entertainment.
MORGANA Tee hee hee, I'm having so much evil fun! *waves her arms around*
She's practically turned throne-lounging into an artform.
GWAINE What in even the hell is this nonsense?
We don't have time to dwell on that though, because it's back to Arthur and co. And they're sitting round a campfire. I SMELL MEANINGFUL CONVERSATIONS!
ARTHUR So, you never told me that Agravaine was evil… why?
MERLIN Erm…
ARTHUR Damn, I feel like an idiot for not working out that he was evil earlier
AUDIENCE You should.
ARTHUR I don't even know where he suddenly appeared from. Why do people hate me?
MERLIN *facepalm*
Something tells me that Arthur would make for a very clingy drunk.
Anywaaaaay, Gwaine is busy trying really hard not to die.
GWAINE LOl I'm a knight of Camelot, silly, I can kick your ass using only the power of snark! *hops around* Come and get me, angry ugly face! *piggyback chokehold*
MOOK Nooo! I have been defeated by his Irish wit and cheeriness!
GWAINE *kick*
MOOK Well, that's a pillar *knocked to the ground* And that's a mace
GWAINE *mace*
MOOK Ow *defeated*
MORGANA I could watch this aaaaaaall day *suggestive eyebrows*
TWO MORE MOOKS LOl :)
GWAINE Oh bugger.
XIII – Ealdor! Unfortunately no longer the home of insane amounts of subtext
But it is the home of more random slow motion shots and some familiar faces, such as…
MERLIN Mother! I haven't seen you in ages!
HUNITH Merlin!
MERLIN So… I met my father…
*akward pause*
XIV – Unspecified amount of time later…
Isolde is going to be fine, so that's nice to know. Also, Arthur's still having his guilt trip. Luckily, now Isolde is fine, Tristan has lightened up a little.
Unfortunately, Agravaine appears to have caught up.
MERLIN Hey, mother, isn't it great being perfectly safe here in Ealdor and not having to worry about anything at all ever. Because we're safe. Sure is nice being safe.
And whilst we're talking about familiar faces… Guinevere, everybody!
And she's staring at sleeping shirtless Arthur because…
ARTHUR Why do I get the feeling that I'm being watched?
GWEN … Hi
ARTHUR …
GWEN So… hug?
ARTHUR That sounds… nice
HUGGING *ensues*
MERLIN Well, I love a happy endi-
SCREAMING *occurs*
MERLIN Oh, bugger.
AGRAVAINE Is this a bad time?
Luckily, in the space of I have no idea, Arthur is kitted out in his chainmail and everyone is waiting in a barn, looking very serious.
TRISTAN Any suggestions?
MERLIN Well, we could always run awaaaaaay
TRISTAN Good idea
EVERYONE EXCEPT MERLIN *buggers off*
MERLIN Time to distract Agravaine through the power of BURNING CARTS!
AGRAVAINE *faceplants in the hill*
EVERYONE ELSE *is spotted anyway* Run awaaaaaaaaay!
SOUNDTRACK EVERYTHING IS GETTING DANGEROUS!
Oh, and this is a two parter! Next time trailers!
NEXT TIME
Everything goes to even more crazy. There is more slow motion, more explosions and Morgana gets a go at 300-ing through everything.
You know, for an episode called The Sword in the Stone part one, this episode didn't have much in terms of swords in stones, did it. Luckily, next week looks set to remedy that. And then some.
