CHAPTER 11

Dynamic Shifts

There it is; the look in his eyes that makes Cha Eun Sang forget to breathe.

"Do you truly believe the words you just uttered?" Young Do asks after a beat.

Cha Eun Sang bites her lip as she sees his sad smile cross his face. He is a poor little rich boy; waiting for validation… Even if it's from her.

"Oh," she agrees.

"Geojismal, " Liar. He looks away and chuckles. "Cha Eun Sang tells me I'm a good man. I never thought I'd hear those words from you."

"Why? They are true," she says defensively. "I... I just remember Tan telling me all the things you did to keep Zeus afloat after your father's scandal and how you were handling it while being in university. It is both admirable and courageous."

"But what does Cha Eun Sang think?" he challenges her. "I don't want to hear what you think from Tan's perspective."

His eyes locks with hers. Cha Eun Sang cannot escape his piercing gaze. She tries to break contact but she is left tracing the features of his face: the perfectly shaped eyebrows, the prominent ridge line of his nose, his strong jaw. She wonders when and how he got the cut across his cheek. It has to be recent since there's slight bruising under the skinned surface.

"I…," she states hesitatingly. "I think you're worth more than your father's legacy. For all your faults, Young Do-ah, you are not him. You don't have to be him to succeed. I would hate to see you hardened because you are trying to please him."

He cackles. "The ever optimistic Cha Eun Sang. I thought by now you'd be cynical. Of all people, you should understand where Jeguk kids like me end up. Definitely nowhere by defying a parent. We are commodities like the assets they acquire."

"Drop the act, Choi Young Do," she says forcefully, annoyed by his sarcasm. "You asked for my opinion, didn't you? Yes, it's a big gamble to walk away from it all if you think what your father is asking you to do goes against what you believe. But you won't be the first to do it, and you're definitely not the last."

Eun Sang does not notice the barrier he raises as she rambles.

"Look at Lee Hyo Shin sunbae. And Jo Myung Soo. They both did their own thing. They're surviving without their parents' legacies. You can do it, too."

Choi Young Do stands up and shoves his hands in his pockets. He starts pacing back and forth like a caged cat.

"I don't think we'll ever live up to our parents' expectation," she says, resisting the pull to lay a hand on him.

He stares at her, judging; measuring her to a standard she's unaware exists.

"I wonder how different things would've been if I pursued you long before you left for the states," he suddenly posits.

Eun Sang blushes. "I think we wouldn't be sitting here, talking."

"No, we won't," he replies, flipping the switch back to the playful Young Do before their conversation turned heavy. "You'd be pregnant with our third child."

"Mwo?" she responds, aghast at his statement. "Yah, what makes you think I would've given you the time of the day?"

He grabs her hand like he has done it a thousand times. "You'd eventually fall for me."

Between the physical contact and the honeyed response, Eun Sang sits paralyzed. Her retort is lodged in her throat, unwilling to come out.

The tension between them breaks when Cha Eun Sang's mobile rings. She withdraws her hand awkwardly before retrieving her device. She is perplexed when she sees Kim Won's work phone flash on the screen. With a quick swipe to the right, she answers.

"Do you have any plans for tonight?" Kim Won asks.

"Not really, why?" she answers.

"Join me for dinner," he requests playfully. "I won't take no for an answer. Besides, I need you to take some documents to Detective Yoon for me."

Cha Eun Sang straightens herself unconsciously before darting her eyes at Young Do.

"Araseo, Oppa," she says. "Where do you want to meet?"

"Just come over to the office. I'll drive us to dinner," he instructs her. "Kumapta, Cha Eun Sang-ssi."

Cha Eun Sang depresses the end button before standing up. She is startled when she realizes Young Do is staring at her.

"That was Kim Won-ssi," she states before he even asks. "He wants me to take some documents to Chan Young-ssi."

"Huh," Young Do grumbles. "When he says jump... ."

"Aniya," It's not like that, she says in a subdued tone. "I'll do anything to help resolve Tan-a's death, even if it means having to be Kim Won's errand girl."

"Mian," Young Do replies apologetically. "It wasn't supposed to to come out that way."

"I know," she accepts his lame attempt in making amends. She stands up and slings her shoulder bag strap over her shoulder. "I have to go."

He stares at the pavement before he speaks. "Do you want a ride?"

Eun Sang looks at him wearily. "I don't want to take up anymore of your time."

"If you were, you know I would've told you," he says, agitated. "I wish you weren't so guarded toward me. It's starting to get old."

Eun Sang scrunches her nose. "I just don't want to -."

"Take advantage of me," he finishes her statement. "I know your dialogue like the back of my hand, Cha Eun Sang."

Eun Sang bites her lip to prevent a remark from escaping her lips.

"Tarawa," Let's go, he says, jerking his head toward the parking lot. "Hopefully, the traffic back to town won't be as bad."

They start walking toward his parked car in silence. He starts unrolling his sleeves and cuffs them at the wrist. Meanwhile, she follows a step behind him without question. She is amazed how they can be boiling hot one minute and tundra cold the next.

Which makes the drive back to the city awkwardly painful.

In the confines of the car, words elude them. A string of songs cuts the tension. EXO's My Answer is in its last stanza when traffic loosens up and Young Do is able to maneuver through the seemingly still cars in the downtown city lanes.

Relief surges through Cha Eun Sang when she sees the familiar grey and black concrete steps leading toward the Jeguk entrance. As soon as Young Do pulls over to the side, her hand immediately grabs the door's release lever.

"Thank you again," she says, pushing the door open.

"Jangkanman, Cha Eun Sang," Young Do says, laying a hand on her shoulder.

Surprised by his touch, she looks at him. "Wae?"

Quietly, he suggests, "Let's start all over."

"Mwolago?" What do you mean? Eun Sang asks.

"Let's... let's be friends again," he proposes, stuttering.

"I...," she begins to say when the car behind them honks. She looks back at the car driver as she steps out of Young Do's car.

Unable to respond to him, she says, "Let's talk about this another time."

And without hearing him call her name, she slams the car door and quickly takes hurried steps toward the Jeguk building.


"Pabbo," Idiot, Young Do chides himself. He definitely knows how to ruin a moment. How does one go from friendly banter to jealous boy friend in sixty seconds?

How can he even consider himself a boy friend when he doesn't even meet the friend category?

Knots form in his stomach. The only thing he's sure of is time did not heal his wounds.

He buried his feelings for her for his sanity and the sanctity of his friendship with Kim Tan. However, his resolution dissolved by mere skin contact. Her fingers against his skin made him ache for her. His fingers on her made him feel like an addict; craving to touch her even when he promises to stop.

He curses under his breath when the car halts in front of a stop light. How long must he continue torturing himself?

"Why must you say such stupid things?" he scolds himself. Getting jealous over the bond between Cha Eun Sang and Kim Won does not solve problems. It just adds on another layer.

Especially when he's assuming his dead friend's brother of courting her.

Kim Won won't stoop that low, would he?

A frustrated growl escapes his lips. He knows he cannot compete with someone who is more accomplished, more polished, and more sophisticated than Kim Won himself.

He is still a better alternative than the security guard.

"Get a hold of yourself, Choi Young Do," he chides himself.

This might be the resolution he needs to force himself to either let her go for good or fight for what wanted all those years ago.

She is the one who forced him to be more honest with himself. She is the one who made him realize the jerk doesn't get the girl. She is the only girl who makes him want to be better.

She is also responsible for reducing him to a dysfunctional mess.

The night of her Liberation Day, his intent is for her to let loose and forget about her current nightmare. Any touch she lay on him that evening, although purely unintentional, at least, he'd like to think it was, was from her state of drunkenness and not to play emotional havoc with his feelings. He chalked up the sudden skinship to repressed sexual frustration on his behalf.

Until she touched him this afternoon. Her fingers singed his skin, and if he is the masochist he has learned to become, he wanted to feel that burn again… and again… and again.

Just the thought of it made his skin flush despite the running air conditioning in the car.

Being on automatic pilot, he reaches the Zeus parking lot without remembering much of how he got there in the first place.

With the work day over, the evening staff greets him in pairs and in passing. The night shift manager, in an attempt to be friendly, asks why he is back at the office.

"I forgot something at the office," he says. "Geogjeonghaji maseyo. Naneun olaedoeji anhseubnida." Don't worry. I won't be long.

The night manager asks again if he would like coffee and a meal to be sent to his office. Young Do declines. He feels bad for deceiving his staff but his trek back to the office is meant to distract. He doesn't want anyone to know he's in the building and worry about him.

He tugs on the knot of his tie. As it comes undone, he balls it up and throws it against the back of the leather couch. He unbuttons the top three buttons of his white shirt before undoing the cufflinks on his wrists. As he rolled up his sleeves, he peruses the different folders Secretary Park left on his desk.

"A charity event invite, a note for another blind date," he recites out loud. He glances at the green folder set on a separate pile. It is the bid of sale and merger for Hanche Hotels, one of the bigger hotel chains in Korea. A three-worded note from his father is nestled on the inside pocket of the folder. Earn your place.

"So the taming starts," Young Do mutters to himself before uncuffing and rolling his sleeves. He is in for the long-haul.

He leaves the folder open and turns his laptop on. Although his mind is on business, one nagging question lingers in his head.

Why did she hesitate on becoming friends again?

He would like to take a gander but he's afraid he might not like the answer.


Cha Eun Sang appears stunned as she walks through the Jeguk lobby. After a brief security scan at the hallway leading to the executive elevators, her thoughts and actions remain uninterrupted— or in her case, empty.

"I want us to be friends again," he says.

"What does that even mean?" she says under her breath.

The haze in her brain remains as she disembarks at Kim Won's floor. Her feet lead her toward his door. Her fist raps lightly against the mahogany panel.

"Deuleowa," Come in, he instructs.

She peeks her head through the crack in the door and waits for him to look up.

"Eun Sang-a, eilowah," he beckons her to enter. "Anneyong."

"Anneyong, Oppa," she says, smiling. "You look busy."

"I am busy," he sighs. "I am sorry for the short notice but I thought Yoon Chan Young can look through this. He asked for Kim Tan's calendar and the official Jeguk calendar of events."

Cha Eun Sang reaches over the table to receive the folio Kim Won extended to her. She flips through the calendar and glosses over its contents. Tan's sloppy handwriting fills the boxes and grids. On a separate file, she flips through the printed calendar dates and events the executive office attends. The list was long and detailed.

"Also, I was hoping you'd like to participate in this," Kim Won adds, handing her a heavy envelope with the Jeguk seal attached.

"What is it?" she asks, opening the hand-pressed paper envelope with her name elegantly scripted in black ink. In the envelope lays an invitation to one of the more prestigious parties Jeguk throws annually.

"It's the Samdong International Fund Raising Night," Kim Won says. "I was hoping you'd be my plus one."

She giggles and looks at him, agog. "Yah, Oppa!"

"What?" he asks, a playful glint appears in his eyes.

"Not to sound ungrateful, but don't you have any other girls lined up for the event?" she asks. "I don't think I will be a welcome sight to the Chairman and Chairwoman."

"Yang Da-kyung would've been my date but she will be in Europe the day of the fundraiser. For an ex-wife, I couldn't ask for more," he replies. "Since she can't make it, I thought you'd make an excellent companion. You're charming, interesting, and a great conversationalist. I don't care about abeoji and eomoni at this point."

"Jinjja? Flatterer," Cha Eun Sang says. "Kre, I'll accept your invite. I guess I'll have to go dress shopping."

"Don't worry about that," he replies. "The outfit's on me. I'll have my personal shopper ask for your measurements so you can try on some outfits."

She bows her head to him.

"Kumapta, dongsaeng," Kim Won says affectionately before slamming a folder on his desk.

"Animnida, Oppa," she says as she tucks the invitation back into the envelope.

"Now, how about that dinner?" Kim Won asks as he shrugs his coat on. "I hope you like seafood. I'm craving sushi."


"Ppali ka. Myung Soo is waiting on us. The party can't start without the party girl," Choi Young Do urges.

Cha Eun Sang follows his orders without question.

He hands her the helmet and she dons it without hesitation.

He straddles the bike and turns the ignition. The rumbling between his legs takes his mind off her momentarily….

Until she wraps her arms around his waist.

Her touch is nowhere close the innocent clutches she bared down on him almost a decade ago. Her grip is firm and bold. The moment her fingers brush up against his abdomen, a tingling sensation shoots down below his waist. Her grasp leaves him flush. The torture continues when he feels her chest against his back. The sensation is euphoric and damning at the same time. He is insane for volunteering to pick her up in his bike.

Driving them safely to the bar is a fight between the tormenting urge to keep her by his side and keeping her safe by putting a large number of people between them.

The bar seems to be the better option, he convinces himself. After all, he cannot be responsible for her when he wants nothing but to desperately cling on his dead best friend's girlfriend.

At the party, Cha Eun Sang becomes everyone's concern. As friends, everyone thought numbing Eun Sang with alcohol would help dull the pain.

For a moment, it did.

She laughs at the jokes, she knocks back drinks willingly and quickly. As she got tipsy, Myung Soo starts swapping her drinks with water. But her recovery is slow. However, every sway, every bodily collision she endures, Choi Young Do happens to be the person next to her, steadying her before she injures herself.

"Oh, someone has to build their tolerance," he says out loud to the group. Everyone laughs, including Cha Eun Sang.

"You know I don't drink," she says, facing her friends. "Although I'm doing it this time because I haven't seen you all in a while. I'll make sure to have a drink from each of you... One."

"You know you don't have to, Eun Sang," Chan Young says.

"I'll be fine," she replies, smiling. "Kombe!"

"Kombe!" the crowd yells in chorus and drinks. Choi Young Do raises his glass but didn't imbibe. Instead, he studies Cha Eun Sang as she smiles like it was killing her. The spark that usually shows her spirit didn't quite twinkle in her eyes.

She consumes the last round of drinks willingly and without concern. Several of their former classmates ask her to dance but she refuses. Instead, she pulls Kang Se-yol and Lee Bo Na to the dance floor as they form their own dance circle while everyone else cheer them on. After a few songs, they come back and Cha Eun Sang crashes against him.

"Mul," she says.

He hands her his water bottle and downs its contents.

Young Do sees she's putting a brave face on. He knows she's there because he guilted her to attend. He feels badly for using her friends to come out for a few hours and forget Tan.

She is a puppet on command. She laughs on cue. She listens intently like it is her job. But for the most part, she remains subdued. That first hour since their arrival, she looked at her watched impatiently. By the second hour, she is inebriated.

"Are you okay?" he asks, putting his hands on her hips to keep her from tipping over.

She nods, whispering to his ear, "I should have considered jet lag and drinking don't go together."

He hears Hyo Shin sunabe clear his throat.

It is that moment Young Do realizes how intimate they looked. She wedged herself between his straddled legs, making their conversation look very suggestive despite the innocent interaction.

"Do you want to go to the terrace to get some air? It might help you clear your head," he suggests.

"Kre," she agrees. She leans against him, pressing her length against him to grab the water bottle Myung Soo set out for them to drink.

She proceeds to grab his wrist and lead him toward the terrace. The rest of their group watch in awe.

"Jagiya, did I miss something?" Lee Bo Na asks Chan Young, pointing at them.

Chang Young stares at the couple disappearing through the crowd. "I know Cha Eun Sang got some really bad news tonight. Kim Won asked him to look out for her."

"Daebak. Their skinship is intense! Don't you think she's been very intimate with him tonight?" Ye-sol asks. "It's not like her."

"Drunk? Check. Jet lag? Check. Lack of sleep?" Myung Soo checks off the list. "I, too, would be acting strangely if I was put through the wringer."

"I just hope they know what they're getting into," Lee Bo Na says worriedly.

"I wonder how different things might be if Cha Eun Sang met Choi Young Do first before Kim Tan," Ye-sol ponders.

"Can't wish for something that's already happened," Myung Soo says before taking a swig out of his beer bottle.

Everyone's attention is diverted to Myung Soo.

"You guys didn't know? He knew Eun Sang before she met Kim Tan in California," he says. "He just didn't know her name. When he did, she was already with Tan."


"Ah, the breeze is refreshing." Cha Eun Sang says, closing her eyes as she leans over the ledge. She giggles, covering her mouth. "Ah, I must be tired. I really can't tell if I'm actually standing or I'm just being supported by this wall."

"Careful," Choi Young Do warns, watching her as she tips over.

"At the rate I'm going, nothing can get worse," she confesses.

"Death. Death is worse," he says quickly. "I can't have you dying when we're burying Kim Tan tomorrow."

"Correction," she replies. "The Tans and the people they choose to attend will be burying Kim Tan tomorrow. Present company excluded."

"That's never stopped you before," he argues.

"No," she answers slowly. "But it still hurts that my designation is distraction to heir apparent."

"Well, their loss is my gain," Young Do shrugs. "Kim Tan was a wet blanket. I think you make a better playmate anyway."

"So, I'm your playmate now?" she asks peering through her hair.

"With Tan gone? Kre. You are his substitute," he answers, teasing.

"Pfft, I'd make a poor substitute, you know that," she says. "I don't play. And when I play, I play by the rules. Tan was the exact opposite."

"Then this time, I'd like to learn how to play games the right way," he states. "Unless you want to learn how NOT to play fair."

"Maybe I should learn to play dirty," she muses. "Everyone in the world seems to operate that way."

"Don't think that way," he mutters huskily. "We need people like you to call us out when we play dirty."

"But it doesn't get me anywhere," she whines. "When will it be my turn to say, 'ah, Cha Eun Sang, you did well. You suffered, but you're getting rewarded now.'."

"Will that make you feel better?" he asks. He closes the gap between them and pats her on the head. "Cha Eun Sang-ssi, charraseo, charraseo."

"Ah, you're so patronizing," she replies, swatting his hand away.

"Aren't you rewarded now?" he queries. "You have good friends. People trust you. What could you ask for?"

"Friends? I really didn't have any of my own until I left Korea," she muses.

"You don't consider us your friends?" he asks, feeling slighted.

"I do… but other than Chan Young, I was assimilated to the proper Jeguk crowd," she says candidly. "Everyone was accommodating, but nonetheless, I was the outsider brought in by Kim Tan."

"You were a rarity, indeed." he says. "But you grew on us. I think it's the novelty of someone who didn't grow up with our problems that made everyone eventually accept you. Nowadays, even Yoo Rachel can talk about you without cringing. You changed everyone's perception of wealth and worth."

"I think I have you, Kim Tan, Chan Young-ssi, and Lee Bo Na for that change. If the kings of the school stood against the Queen, I could've been stoned for being a fake," she says, her thoughts reverting to a time best forgotten. "But things haven't changed since I've come back. Chairman and Chairwoman made sure I knew where I stood. I will be constantly be put down, judged not for my talent but for what I was born without."

She pauses, playing with the water bottle cap in her hand. "I may not have grown up with money, but I'm not trash."

"It's not worth your effort to make them think otherwise," he advices her like a loyal friend. "They're programmed to think that way."

"You were one of those people who looked down on me," she mutters before taking a drink from her water bottle.

Choi Young Do looks at her. "There are many things I've done to you, Cha Eun Sang-ssi. Looking down on you wasn't one of them."

She stares at him for a long time before focusing back on the dark night.

They both stood still for a while. The sound of the busy streets, conversations carrying on, and blasting music fills the silence between them. They are both lost in their thoughts.

"Choi Young Do," she says.

"Cha Eun Sang," he says simultaneously.

A nervous chuckle emanates from their lips. Their eyes meet before they drop their gazes to their feet.

"I don't know if you feel the same way about me as you did back then... but right now, I'm hoping you'd allow me to lean on you until I can get myself back together," she requests.

"You have me for as long as you need me," he says, a fist clenching and unclenching at his side.

"There was a time when you and I exchanged words and meant them, Young Do. There was a reason why you told me we should just pretend we didn't know each other."

"That was before Kim Tan died," he argues.

"Why does Kim Tan's death change that?" she asks. "To me, even if circumstances change, self-preservation reigns overall."

An audible sigh escapes his lips. "Aaahh, tell a girl you like her, she dumps you like yesterday's trash. Tell her to pretend not to know each other and she remembers it for life. How is it that you're drunk and you remember everything I say verbatim?"

"I don't like to brag but I'm a smart girl," she retorts before her tone turns somber. "And I remember things that hurt me a lot. What you said truly stung."

Young Do laces his fingers and looked ahead. "I'd be a fool if I said I didn't try to make things difficult for you. From where I stood, saying what I said was the only way I can send you away. I don't think I can remain a friend to you when you were with Tan."

"But it was okay for you to be friends with him?" she argues.

He doesn't say a word.

"I guess I understand the American saying 'bros before 'hos' statement," she laments.

"Look at you and your American slang," he says, chuckling.

She takes another drink from the water bottle. She starts swaying to the music in the background.

"Ah, Kim Tan, why did you have to leave me?" she bellows to the wind. "If you were going to do so, you should've not promised to be next to me."

"Would you prefer he played with your heart?" Young Do asks calmly.

"Ani," she admits, spinning around to face him. "But it would've been nice if he just quit before I spent all that time in the states. Ah, it would've been much easier speaking in Korean."

"Then you should've just turned him down and come to me when I asked you to," he says. "Then you would've been spared."

"Then we won't have this drama between us," Cha Eun Sang retorts.

Choi Young Do remains silent.

A buzzing sound from the distance starts becoming louder and more persistent. It didn't take long for Young Do to realize it's his morning alarm. Still bleary, he opens an eye; then the other. His eyes fixate on the glowing orb rising over the horizon. He turns off the alarm. It is a little past 5:15.

The dream he had is from the night before Kim Tan's funeral. It's been a while since he dreamt of Cha Eun Sang. The only thing scaring him about this last one is how real it felt.

He grumbles as he gets off the couch to stretch.

He didn't do much work last night but he got the clarity he needed. With newly found determination, he puts the folder back on his desk and polices his coat and tie.

He heads to his room at the VVIP floor for a shower and change of clothes.

The one persisting thought his dream revealed to him this morning was she did ask for his help. Damn it if she denies she needs him as much as he needs her.