Our Fate is Red

Summary: Everyone in the world is tied to their soulmate by the "Red String of Fate" tied around their little finger. Ian and Mickey had been connected in that way since birth, but before they could meet, Mickey was so scared of being gay that he dug deep into his skin and severed the string. The string doesn't connect them anymore, but fate still has a way of bringing people together. Soulmate!AU

Disclaimer: I don't own Shameless.

Well, this chapter is certainly a rollercoaster of angst and emotion. I'm so sorry. It's important for character development, I swear.

IF YOU'RE NOT ABLE TO HANDLE NON-EXPLICIT MENTIONS OF SEXUAL ABUSE, THEN DON'T READ FURTHER.


Chapter 11 – Revelation

Even though Ian had figured out the truth, he still had to convince Mickey to accept him. Unfortunately, that was easier said than done. Mickey had spent his whole life running, scared and alone. Ian couldn't blame him for being so afraid; he remembered the waves of pain he'd felt through the string before their connection had been severed. No one should have to deal with that kind of fear.

Still, Ian wasn't about to give up, not when he'd finally found his soulmate again. He wanted Mickey to feel secure in being safe and loved for once. There had to be some way of convincing him that their feelings for each other were okay.

If only Mickey would just talk to him about it.

He sat on the bed in Mandy's room as he tried to think of something. She used his legs as a pillow, hanging out with him as usual. She was rambling on about something, but he wasn't really listening. He only had one thing on his mind at the moment.

"Hey, Mandy… do you think it's possible to go against fate?" he asked quietly.

Mandy frowned at the unexpected question. "Why? Did ya find your soulmate and see he's butt ugly or somethin'?"

"No… that's not it," Ian replied.

Mandy looked up at him curiously, wondering why he was so serious all of a sudden. "Alright. What happened?"

Ian sighed. He couldn't even pretend to be casual about it. "I think I found him," he admitted, "but… he keeps pushing me away."

Mandy smirked. "Who is it?"

"Can't tell you. He doesn't like people knowing he's gay," Ian grumbled. "That's why he won't be with me. He can't admit who he really is."

Mandy shrugged. "I wouldn't worry about it," she replied unsympathetically. "You've heard all the stories. Soulmates always end up with each other in the end, connected forever." She held up her finger and stared at the light pink string around it thoughtfully.

Ian didn't want to look down at his own pathetically short string, but he didn't have to. During the last couple days, he'd become painfully aware of it pulsing rhythmically like the blood through his veins. "But…" he stammered helplessly. "What if he found a way to cut the string?"

"He… what?" Mandy laughed in disbelief. "That's not possible."

"It is, because he did. That's how fuckin' scared he is of being with me," Ian chuckled humorlessly. "It's just so frustrating! I know what he felt when he kissed me. He wants to be with me."

"Jesus Christ," Mandy whispered, sitting up and staring at him with wide eyes when she realized that he was serious. "I… I have no idea what could happen if you're not connected. I've never heard of that before."

It was the answer Ian had been expecting, but he still couldn't help feeling disappointed. "I just… I thought he felt the same way about me. I wanna be with him, but I also don't wanna push him away by trying too hard, you know?"

Mandy grimaced. "Honestly? He sounds like an asshole. He knows you're his soulmate, but he still won't even admit he likes you back?"

Ian hesitated. "Well…" he said slowly. "He doesn't exactly know."

Mandy raised an eyebrow, waiting for an explanation.

Ian sighed and decided to just tell her the short version of the story. "He told me he cut his string when he was a kid. The connection to my soulmate stopped when I was a kid," he said quickly. "I put it all together, and it just made sense."

"Sounds fucked up," Mandy mumbled.

"Yeah, it kind of is," Ian admitted. "But just wait until you kiss your soulmate for the first time, Mandy. You'll understand."

Mandy was silent for a moment. "So… you love him?"

"I… I like the way he smells," Ian replied lamely. He wasn't ready to toss around words like 'love' when he didn't even know if Mickey was ever going to speak to him again.

"A match made in heaven," Mandy laughed.

Ian didn't laugh with her.

Mandy just sighed at his glum face. "Listen, just… don't worry about it. If you two were disconnected all this time, and you still ended up falling for each other, then maybe fate is still on your side."

Ian looked back at her and smiled weakly. "Yeah, we'll see," he said.

"You know I'm right," Mandy responded with a grin. She pushed his shoulder playfully. Ian pushed her back, finally letting out a genuine little laugh.

"So… what's your soulmate feel like?" he asked, just to change the subject.

Mandy lay back down and examined her finger once again. "Well… they feel pretty far away from me right now, but from what I can tell…"


That was enough. Mickey didn't want to hear any more.

Neither of the two friends noticed as he moved away from the slightly ajar door to Mandy's room. He hadn't intended to listen in on them at first, but it happened anyway.

And he regretted it.

Mickey chewed on his lip and tried not to panic as he stumbled into the living room and came face to face with his dad.

"Watch where the fuck you're going!" Terry shouted, shoving him out of the way.

Mickey didn't respond. He just let it happen, his mind still busy trying process what he'd just heard. All of the pain he thought he'd cut out of himself when he was a kid resurfaced. It was like the one thing that had been keeping him safe was suddenly gone. His safety net had never even fucking existed in the first place.

Mickey wanted to puke.

Of course Ian was his real soulmate. How could it have been anyone else? He should've known. He should've fucking known.

He'd let his soulmate touch him and taste him. His soulmate had been inside him, poisoning his thoughts with the idea of love and a better, safer future.

Mickey loved Ian back, he really did. Ian was everything he'd ever feared and everything he'd ever wanted all in one package. But he'd never believed in happy endings. Instead of an almost declaration of love, he'd heard a death sentence.

Mickey wanted to shout and scream. He wanted to trash his room, smashing everything in sight. But he didn't do any of those things. Instead, he grabbed a whole case of beer from the fridge and headed to his room. As soon as he was alone, he opened one of the bottles and hurriedly chugged every last drop.

He didn't want to think anymore.


Mickey didn't even know what time it was. His mind was hazy, but one thing was clear: he wanted Ian. He wanted him so bad.

He wasn't as drunk as he had been a few hours ago. Somehow the soberness settling in on his wavering mind allowed for a moment of clarity he never would've had otherwise.

He wanted to scream at Ian. He didn't even know what he wanted to tell him, but he just wanted to scream it.

Of course he fuckin' liked Ian back, and of course he wanted to be with him.

But despite all that he'd done, Mickey still loved his father. He couldn't let go of the one thing he'd always wanted more than anything else: his dad's approval. His family meant everything to him.

Mickey's insides were all jumbled up with contradictions. It was either Ian or his family. He couldn't have both. If his dad ever found them together, he would shoot first and ask questions later. But at the same time, even to save both of their lives, saying goodbye to Ian was not something he could live with.

God, he just wanted to kiss that stupid sad frown off of Ian's fucking face.

Without thinking, he got up and headed straight for the last place he remembered Ian being: Mandy's room. He walked through the dark hallways and threw open the door without even a second thought.

What he saw instead instantly sobered him up.

His dad was lying on top of Mandy, and tears were running down her cheeks. It was clear what he was trying to do. He'd probably done it several times before.

His own fucking daughter, the sick pervert.

The two of them gaped in horror when they saw that they were being watched. Mickey felt his heart break when he saw the shame and terror in his sister's eyes.

He didn't stop to ask questions. He forgot all about Ian for the moment and grabbed the nearest gun.