Disclaimer- I own nothing
Author's Note: Thank you all for your condolences. It means a lot that not only you understood why I had not updated, but also you were sympathetic. You all are too sweet. Of course I am still going through a lot, but writing helps me clear my head a little. Hopefully this isn't confusing, my head is a pretty confusing place right now. I really hope you enjoy this chapter and please let me know what you think.
You all are so very sweet, thank you.
-Lily
You learn what's right and what's wrong at an early age, able to decipher what behavior will be tolerated, what will be rewarded, and what will be severely punished. But as you age, as your experience gets the better of you, lines blur. Nothing is right and wrong. Nothing is good and bad. There is more to it. What works for you, may hinder someone else and what allows you to succeed may lead to another's failure. How do you know that what you are doing will drive you forward and what will reel you backwards? Do you ever know? Or is life a guessing game, making decisions based on the moment, hoping it all turns out okay in the long run. What happens when your heart gets involved, what happens when people rely on you, what happens when one decision will hurt one but bring you closer to your desire? Is it possible to appease everyone in your life?
The dim lights in the gym reminded him that in 2 hours his blood would be pumping throughout his veins, circulating through his heart as the sweat evaporated from his skin. The basketball drummed along the court, bouncing away from him as he let it go. For once, Lucas didn't want to be on the court, shooting 3 pointers just for fun, or rebounding simply because he was one of the best in the state. For once, he wanted to be somewhere else.
He glanced at the clock, knowing she would most likely wake up soon, probably disoriented with her hair tangled by her face, her toes cold from having kicked out from underneath the covers. She would probably groan and throw her arm over her head, trying to catch just another 15 minutes of sleep before her headache caught up with her, her couch threatened to escaped behind closed lips, and a sneeze tickled the back of her throat burning it with irritation. They were making steps towards becoming something more, at least to him they were. It was strange to go from hating someone so much to wanting to be there for them for anything.
He found her attractive, of course he did. He wanted to have sex with her, of course he did. Hell he would never leave the room if that were all they did behind closed doors. But, more than that, more than just physical attraction and carnal desires, he wanted to know everything about her. Lucas wanted to spend every waking hour learning her fears and wants, building a memory as it all unfolded. He wanted to know in his heart that he would always have someone there for him, besides blood relatives. If he died, he wanted someone to care.
So he figured he had two choices. He could play in the basketball game and let it take him away for an hour or two, or he could find the hotel room and be there when she awoke. He would be the first thing she awoke to, a smile delineated on his face and a grin finding its way onto hers. He would hand her a cool glass of water with condensation on the edges, and her hand would grace his. It would be enough. It would be more than enough.
He sounded like an idiot.
"So you guys going to win today?" Lily asked, sitting in the floral chair located besides the television, a small table intercepting the two along the wall.
"Of course Ms. Scott, do you think otherwise?" Jake chuckled, rubbing the shaving cream along his chin, causing a small smile to break out along her face.
"Not in the team, just in this one guy. He's terrible. I think his name is Jake or Blake, something like that," she smirked.
"Oh yeah?" he asked, curious.
"Oh definitely. Lucas was talking about him and apparently he is the worst player in 25 years. I feel bad for him but I guess someone needs to get the water for the boys on the court."
"Well I'll tell this Jake to step it up today," he joked along with her, a straight face played along his cheeks.
"Thanks."
"But hey, is he good looking?" he asked with a small smile etched onto his face and she nodded.
"Oh very much so," Lily smiled, walking over to him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders.
"Well that's all that matters," he pointed out and she giggled, bringing her lips to brush along his. In a moment she was swept into the feeling of their lips together, melding into one, as the electricity pulsed between the two. She thought she felt a spark but she knew that could have easily just been her imagination.
"Wow," she breathed as the two separated, Jake breaking the short kiss between the two.
"Your not half bad yourself," he smiled, and the two, for that precise moment were in perfect harmony. There were no decisions to be made, questions to ponder or obstacles that obstructed them. She was Lily Scott and he was Jake Davis. They were right.
Lucas swept his uniform overtop his head, feeling the cool fabric along his chest. He left his bag in the locker room, having an hour before the game, deciding to go and take a walk to waste the time. They were meeting in 30 minutes to discuss pre game a the line up. Things he already knew.
He thought it was stupid know, debating on skipping the whole game just to be there when Brooke woke up. She only had a cold, something that would go away in a week, maybe two. There was just something about the way she came to him. She came to him that night, trusting that he would make everything all better. Nobody had ever confided in him, wanting him to be there to wish everything away. It made him feel, important. And it was Brooke. The first girl he has ever really wanted to be with. She was everything a girl should be, she was perfect inside and out. If there was one flaw the girl possessed, he couldn't find it. He wanted to be there for her, proving that he could be a relationship guy, proving that she could want him. He wanted to deserve her.
But he couldn't. No matter how much he wanted to see her wake up, he couldn't. Doing so would cause him to miss the game, and that wouldn't hurt him, but the team. They functioned as a group, supporting each other when they were down, and celebrating together when a victory was well won. They laughed and fought, cheered and yelled. Leaving them during the tournament would be abandoning them and although he believed that they could do it, pulling together to win without him, it just wouldn't be fair. It would be selfish for him to just leave because of a girl. Even if the girl was the one he wanted more than anything.
"Lucas where the hell is your jersey?" Whitey yelled, his voice booming through the locker room as the blonde took off his shooting shirt.
"Shit," he muttered, diggings through his bag. It was just his luck that he would bring the wrong jersey to the gym, leaving the white one situated on corner of the bed, grabbing the black one instead.
"That's about right," he agreed.
"Does anyone have an extra?" Lucas asked knowing the question would receive the answer 'no.' Of course he was right, everyone shaking their head.
"Well if you don't get a uniform, you'll be sitting your ass on the bench," Whitey told him, his voice rough. Lucas nodded.
There was nothing he could do, except accept the fact that he would just have to watch the game from the bench. Karma, he figured. After all, he had almost decided to skip the game altogether.
He tried to calculate how long it would take to get back to the hotel, if he was able to get a taxi right away. Probably 25 minutes, but still, the game would have already started, then he would see Brooke in the room, so who knows how long it would take him to get back to the game.
Fuck.
He figured he mind as well try to make at least the 2nd half of the game, grab a cab and get his uniform, not even looking in her direction. He would get in and out in 5 minutes sharp and be on his way. She would never know.
"Lucas."
The voice was soft and yet rough at the same time, a sniffle coming right after the 's' sounded in his name. Too determined to get to the hotel, he didn't turn around, leaving the school behind as he walked along the sidewalk, not thrilled to find no free taxi right off the bat.
"Lucas." This time he chose to turn around, trying to control the beating of his heart. He knew the voice sounded like Brooke, but she would be in bed, sleeping. He knew it was just wishful thinking on his part.
He turned around and he couldn't suppress the smile on his face, seeing the beautiful brunette in her cheerleading uniform coming towards him. For a moment he was lost, her legs so long, her stomach so flat. Her hair fluttered in the breeze, lips too full, and cheeks bright pink.
A small sniffle broke him from his thoughts.
"Brooke," he breathed, and then a million things jumped into his mind. "What are you doing out here, its freezing, and your sick? And why are you in your cheerleading uniform, again, your sick, and again, its freezing! You should be in bed, sleeping or taking a warm bath, anything besides being out here," he rambled, but she broke his long talk, showing him the uniform, folded neatly in the palms of her hands.
"You left these you know," Brooke smiled, ignoring her headache, as she feel into his eyes, the blue absorbing her orbs.
"Brooke!" he yelled elated, grabbing her in his arms, briefly bringing her from her feet, she giggled, and the sound was like music to his cold ears.
"Well hey if I get that response every time I bring your clothing, well then I might bring you more in the future," she smiled and so did he.
"Don't tell me you're going to cheer?" he pleaded with her, knowing that she wasn't feeling well and that was not a sport he wanted her doing, especially if she was a little disorientated from the fever or whatever medicine she had taken when she woke up.
"Of course I am," she said, as if it were the most obvious thing.
"But you're not feeling well…" he began, but she interrupted.
"You worry too much Scott. But hey can we go inside?" she asked, trying to create friction as she rubbed her arms together for heat.
"Oh yeah, I am so sorry, I am such an idiot," he muttered to himself, holding the door open for her when they reached it, the heat gladly embracing the two.
"Um hey," Brooke said, looking around, running her fingers through her hair.
"Yeah?" Lucas asked curious.
"Thanks. For you know caring. But um I'll be better soon, so you won't have to worry about me after that," she said, never meeting his eyes.
"I like caring about you Brooke. I told you, I'm here," he said, his voice ringing with honesty.
"I know, but Lucas, how are we ever going to work as friends?" she sighed.
"First, you have to stop dooming us. You need to realize that I'm here and I'm different from the person I was. I want to be here for you and I do hope that you feel the same way. I am not saying that our friendship will be perfect, but I think we need to give it a try," he said and Brooke agreed.
"Lucas, first, please know that I will be here for you, for anything. Never think otherwise. Unless you are a complete jerk and call me fat or something. If that happens, then we are done," she joked and he smiled. "But I'm not sure I can be friends with you."
"What do you mean?" he asked, knowing he didn't have too much time, 5 minutes before the game started. The door concealed them, the bleachers hiding them from Whitey, who thought Lucas was gone to get his uniform.
"I don't think I can be just friends with you, anymore," she said, her breath heavy and her eyes brimming with tears. She knew it was because her cold, her eyes always did this when she wasn't feeling well. But it was embarrassing, standing before Lucas, someone perfect in every way possible. Someone she spent time avoiding and hating, denying in every way.
But here he was, caring for her like she had never been cared for, besides Jake, but he didn't count. He was there when she was sick, leaving the door open, caring about her when she was cold, not wanting her to cheer. He decorated a gym just for her, to match the description she gave to Karen when she joined him for dinner.
She didn't just join him at that dinner to save him, to act as the girl that he needed her to pretend she was. Part of it was so no other girl would grab his attention, then having him realize he wanted someone else. But the biggest part was because she wanted to know what it would be like, to sit next him and act like they were in a relationship. And it felt right, whether she knew it then or not; she knew it now, everything they were was right.
Author's Note: Hey, I know this isn't the best. But I wanted to try and get back into writing. It may take a chapter or two to get back in the right flow, but I hope this works okay too.
Thank you for reading and please review.
-Lily
