Authors Notes: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. Update again! I AM ON FIRE. I AM ON AN ACTUAL ROLL LIKE A ROLLING STONE ROLLING TOWARDS THE TOWN THAT IS FOREVER ROLLING. You know what else has put me in a fan-freaking-tabulous mood? Well, (VERY small spoiler alert for Merlin Series 4, although a spoiler it is all the same, I guess, so stop reading now and skip a line or two if you don't want to see) Mooorrggaauuusseeee livvvessss! And she will be back! And alive and back and alive! THE JOY I FEEL CANNOT BE EXPRESSED FULLY ENOUGH. Asdfghjkl

Wooooaaahhhh, it's just too much to handle.

So, anyway, that aside: ENJOY MAH UPDATE OF UPDATED UPDA...TION. I felt like there wasn't enough of Morgana and Morgause in the last chapter, so here they are doing what they do best: shrieking at each other :)

PoisoningPigeonsinthePark - But how do you know you don't taste nice? Has anybody taken a bite out of your arm before? COME HERE. YOU WILL LET ME SEASON YOU AND YOU WILL ENJOY IT. I mean, urhm, yes. Gaius dancing. I had entirely too much fun writing it. And poor old Gwen. Everybody just shouts at her or punches her in the face in this story really...but at least she gets to spend her free time picking flowers :)

Namikaze Artemis - Ohmyjollyhockingsticks, YOU LAUGHED THAT MUCH? AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH SO MUCH PRIDE. And yes, everything you said was most definitely a better idea than what Morgana did. The silly sausage still can't lie, bless her.

Bean Cat - May I just say, BEST NAME EVER. I am completely unbiased even though it came from my last A/N. Honest. Thank you for reading and reviewing! :D

Unformal Sorrelle - You just...you just made the word epic even more EPIC. ASDFGHJKL. YES. Thank you! I do attempt to keep them at least a little in character! COOKIES. COOKIES FOR ME? OM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM.

fortheloveofcamelot - 'an extremely good writer' WHAT. EVEN. IS. THIS. I CAN'T EVEN HANDLE THE AMOUNT OF JOY I AM FEELING TODAY. MY FEELINGS ARE FEELING THINGS I DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND. Thank you! I am full of like, I DON'T EVEN KNOW. You even spoke about unicorns and you have a horse and I CAN'T EVEN. LOOK WHAT YOUR REVIEW HAS DONE TO ME. LOOK WHAT IT HAS DONE.

Eavis - A FELLOW TOGA WEARER? Can this be? IS THIS THE REAL LIFE, OR IS THIS JUST FANTASY? I'm glad you like my story, and thanks for reviewing! :D

lilyplusjamesistotallove - I can't even. Ok. Ok get it together, girl. You can respond to this review. You can. I CAN'T. THERE WERE SO MANY NICE THINGS AND I CAN'T EVEN DEAL WITH IT. AND YOU CALLED ME AUNTIE AGAIN. I AM AT DEATHS DOOR BECAUSE OF THE AMOUNT OF HAPPINESS I AM FEELING AND I AIN'T EVEN MAD.

Dawn that Shines - YAY. You looked insane! THIS PLEASES ME. Intruging idea for Morgana's next plan...intriguing indeed... :)

mysilentwitness - HAPPY BIRTHDAY AND JAZZ HANDS AND PARTY POPPERS. It's all gravy, I laughed when she was smashed in the face too. 'phenomenal' NO NO NO NO NO. I MEAN YES. BUT NO. YOU ARE TOO KIND.

Kitty O - Um um um, I suppose that was a little unsporting of NA but TALLY HO and PIP PIP, I get super awkward about things like these so I AM MOVING ON - TO SEASON YOU AND ENJOY YOUR REVIEW. Which I enjoyed immensely, by the way. IMMENSELY.


Evil, Shady Dealings


11.

A Lesson in Fashion


"...and there were so many fabrics to choose from! They were all different colours and I just couldn't decide whether I wanted another green dress or whether I should perhaps break away from my usual conventions. I mean, green is in fashion at the moment, but I just keep thinking to myself 'Morgana, you are the King's ward, you can lead the fashion'. So, I may very well go back to the market with Gwen and see if the purple material is still there and then I could have a purple dress fashioned. You do not think that is foolish, do you?"

Morgause, who was seated opposite her sister in a very slouched and disinterested way on a tattered chair in the cave, gave a slow blink.

Morgana, sitting on her much more comfortable chair, acknowledged that her sibling was alive and took this as confirmation to continue speaking. "And dear Gwen, she kept looking at all of the yellow material available. Did you know that she only ever seems to wear yellow? There have been odd occasions scattered throughout the years where I might have seen her trying a blue colour or, on more daring days, a smatter of red, but other than that she really does seem intent on looking like the human embodiment of a sunflower."

The young witch paused to take a small breather, having been speaking for the past half hour at least. Her eyes glanced over the blonde opposite and she noted that for all intents and purposes Morgause looked as though she were at about to cease breathing at any moment if she dared to care any less about the conversation she was currently engaged in. Passively engaged in, to be correct. The older witch hadn't uttered a word since Morgana had brought up her favourite topic of choice and had instead slid down in her chair, with her legs stretched out resting on a battered stool in front of her, and a glass of wine in hand that had quickly been downed within the first few minutes of conversation.

"Morgause, have you even been listening to a word I have said?"

She received another impassive blink in response.

"I am getting the distinct impression that you are barely awake!"

Pause.

. . .

Blink.

"Morgause!"

"Sister." The blonde responded, with not a note of any emotion whatsoever in her voice. It seemed as though the woman were almost dead. She had even sunk a little further back into her chair and the thought drifted into her head that she might as well go and lie down on her bed for all the enthusiasm she was showing.

"Would it kill you to offer some form of opinion in this conversation?"

"This is not a conversation. This is another one of your fashion monologues."

Morgana narrowed her eyes and it was plain to see that she had taken the other woman's statement very personally. As she usually did with every statement her sister articulated, because, as she had said many times before, her sister was 'rude, intolerable and vastly unsupporting in any venture anybody attempts.'

"Excuse me?"

Morgause let out a long and tired "Uurrrggghhh" sound, before attempting to reach the bottle of wine on a small table beside her. Sadly, in her slouched position, she found that her arm could not stretch so far and with a disgruntled huff she gave up and stared accusingly at the raven haired witch opposite instead. "Look what you have done to me! I am reduced to inertia!"

"What I have done to you?" Morgana exclaimed, looking not at all as though she agreed with her sisters' evidently ludicrous allegation. "I do not see how your unwillingness to participate in conversation is my fau-"

"Conversation? That was anything but conversation! What you have just subjected me to is more akin to torture!"

"Well perhaps if you took more of an interest in your appearance then you would not find the topic of fashion so unpleasant!" Morgana replied irritably, a sulky frown now very evident on her features. Here she was, sharing all of her vast knowledge of fashion with her sister and all the blonde could do was complain! It was utterly insufferable.

Morgause was eyeing her closely, a decidedly dangerous expression on her face, and for a moment or two Morgana shifted uneasily on her chair. She rather wondered whether she should have announced her last words. Morgause did have a habit of indulging in her fractious temperament after all –

"WHATEVER ARE YOU SUGGESTING?" The blonde abruptly roared, a crack suddenly appearing on the glass still clutched tightly in her hand.

Oh Goddess, magic was flaring up and cracking glass, abort conversation path, abort conversation pa-

"I AM AT ALL TIMES THE VERY EPITOME OF SPLENDOUR!"

"Oh, goodness, yes! I was not for one moment suggesting otherwi-"

"DO NOT ATTEMPT TO BACKTRACK NOW, MORGANA! THAT KIND OF COWARDICE DISGUSTS ME!" And with that bellow, the glass in Morgause's hand promptly exploded, sending tiny shards of glass hurtling in every direction. Not that the older witch seemed at all bothered by this occurrence as she continued to send a fiery glare towards her sister.

Morgana, who had shrunk back into her chair to avoid the flying glass, took a deep breath to gather her courage. And then, bravely, "It is merely that you...you continue to wear white shirts with the sleeves rolled up and dark trousers, which are not at all becoming of a lady and-"

"They are practical!" Morgause broke in, and her voice although quieter was no less threatening. "I am living in a cave, Morgana, and practicality is key. Does fashion not accommodate for practicality?"

"Well, I-"

"I know one thing that certainly falls short regarding practicality. And that is your pathetic excuse for armour."

Morgana's eyes widened with indignation "I think you will find my armour is both fashionable and practical!"

"I will find no such thing." Morgause scoffed "I have only seen you wearing it but a few times and even then it was plain to see that your armour was not serving its true purpose."

"Yes it is! There is absolutely nothing wrong with it - !"

"Sister, it is made out of what looks like sequins. If I challenged you with a fork, I think it is safe to assume I could deal you some serious damage."

Morgana folded her arms across her chest moodily, turning her head the other way to stare resolutely at the cave wall instead of her despicable sister. She outright refused to have anything more to do with her. She was being incredibly quarrelsome and difficult to talk to. Just as she always was. Why couldn't the blonde be more approachable and friendly? Why in Goddess' name did she, Morgana, deserve to have such an argumentative and stubborn witch for a sister? The injustice of it all -

"Morgana, I do not know whether you have noticed, but you are staring at a wall."

Just ignore her. She was just being her usual impolite self and –

"I realise you are sometimes mentally challenged, but I must confess that this is a little odd even for you-"

"I am ignoring you!" The younger sibling snapped, eyes still locked onto the cave wall as if it were the most intriguing scenery she had ever encountered "You are in one of your unreasonable moods and I have decided that I will no longer speak with you unless you appease me!"

"Unless I appease you? You are not Queen yet, Morgana."

There was an offended huff in reply, but it seemed as though the young witch was going to keep to her word and remain silently upset. Morgause tried a few more attempts at socialisation (although admittedly these mostly contained insults and heavy sarcasm) before announcing that she gave up and Morgana might as well leave.

And leave she did.

Even without a hug.


"It's nothing, really Gwen. I am just going with Arthur and some of the knights to visit a few of the outlying villages and Uther has demanded that I wear armour. All we want to do is show face and lift some of the citizen's spirits but, of course, the King likes to make things difficult."

Gwen paused in the middle of Morgana's room, with the raven haired woman's rather light armour in her hands and a small frown surfacing on her face "I'm sure his foremost thoughts are of your safety, milady."

The ward glanced to her maidservant, and her rather adorably loyal expression, and let out a small sigh. She should have known Gwen wouldn't encourage complaints about the King. "Yes, yes. I'm sure you're right. Now," She gave a smile and turned around "Dress me!"

"But you are already clothed, milady."

"I was referring to my armour, Gwen."

"Oh!" The dark skinned woman hurried forwards, feeling thoroughly embarrassed and flustered and helped Morgana into the silvery chainmail. "There we are!" She announced as she took a step back, hoping to brush aside her earlier stupidity, "You look lovely!"

"I look what?"

Gwen froze. What had she said? Had she said something wrong? She must have said something wrong. She wasn't having a good today. She was doing everything wrong today. She wished it wasn't today. She wished she were out picking flowers and –

"WHAT ARE YOU INSINUATING?" Morgana screamed, whipping around to face her maidservant with furious eyes "DO YOU NOT THINK I AM ADEQUATELY PREPARED FOR ANY BATTLES I MAY FACE? IS THAT WHAT YOU ARE TRYING TO SUGGEST?"

"No, no, no, no! I wasn't saying anything of the sort, milady!" Gwen gushed feebly, waving her hands as if to both reinforce her innocence and attempt to calm the enraged ward "I was just commenting on how nice you look today, even with your armour on, and I-"

"Oh, so it is about my armour then! However did I guess! I will have you know this armour is incredibly practical, thank you very much!"

"I think you misunderstood, I really didn't mean-"

"I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU MEANT!" Morgana shrieked hysterically, storming towards the door in a very dramatic way that she hoped emphasized her displeasure.

"But I-"

The ward paused briefly in the doorway to shoot Gwen an incensed glare "You may be of the opinion that I might as well wear a sack cloth for all the good this armour is doing me, but I will not sacrifice fashion in order to compensate for safety!" And with that said, Morgana flung herself out of the room and down the corridor, leaving a very perplexed maidservant behind.

"I AM THE KING'S WARD!" Another shout suddenly echoed out from far down the corridor, startling Gwen and causing her to jump slightly "I AM THE FASHION!"


Against her better judgment, Morgana was on her way to see her sister. It had been three days since her last visit, and the raven haired witch had decided this was long enough to ignore Morgause for. The blonde would be feeling entirely isolated and lonely, and she was sure to run into Morgana's arms begging for forgiveness and –

"THERE YOU ARE!"

The young witch had barely dismounted her horse before Morgause popped out and into view from the entrance of the cave, carrying some heap of fabric in her arms. "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? I have only been waiting for three whole days, sister! For Goddess' sake! I try and do something nice for you and you refuse to appear!"

Morgana blinked, pulling her red hood down to get a better look at her infuriated sister. Oh joy, she had so missed being screamed at – "I was merely showing you that I will not sit around and tolerate your rudeness, Morgause."

"Well that is simply wonderful, sister. Please do tell me more, only know that I am completely uninterested as I have something of much greater magnitude to speak about." The older sibling replied as she reached Morgana.

"Morgause!"

"Oh do hush and look!" And, with a flourish and a big smile, the blonde presented the other woman with the material she had been holding protectively in her arms.

It billowed out in the wind and all Morgana could understand was that it was purple and a complete mess. She could not, for the life of her, comprehend what it was supposed to be. There was stitching, there was uneven lengths and there was purple. "I...I don't..." The witch faltered helplessly, not wanting to dampen a moment that her sister was evidently very proud of.

"It is a dress, Morgana!" Morgause pointed out, giving the material a small shake as if she thought her sister was hard of sight "I made it for you without the aid of magic! And it is that exact purple fabric of which you were speaking about on your last visit. I was thinking about how I had upset you, and I tried to think of a way in which I could reconcile with you, so I went all the way to the market in disguise, snatched up this purple...whatever it is, and made you a dress!"

There was a long silence, in which Morgause continued to absolutely beam at her younger sister, and Morgana stared in mixture of shock and disgust at the thing before her.

"That is not a dress, Morgause."

"Of course it is!"

"That is a catastrophe. You have utterly butchered that material-"

The blonde's features quickly contorted into her trademark scowl. "Oh, well do forgive me for attempting to be kind to you! I have only been working on this...this...thing for the past forty eight hours! But nothing is ever good enough for you, so I shall just set it alight and have done with it - !"

"No, no, no! Morgause!" Morgana moved forwards, quickly snatching the purple material out of her sisters' grasp and holding it close to her in an almost defensive manner "You are so sensitive! You did not let me finish!"

Morgause narrowed her eyes suspiciously "I think you had said quite enough-"

"What I was so close to saying," The young witch interrupted before the blonde could get any further "Was that although this is, in every sense of the word, hideous, it is also one of the nicest things somebody has ever done for me."

"...oh."

"'Oh' indeed." Morgana replied with a smile on her face, bouncing forwards to fling her arms around the older woman, the purple abomination squashed between them.

Morgause sunk into the hug in a somewhat disgruntled manner, her chin resting on the other's shoulder. "It is not as bad as you are making it out to be though."

"I am afraid it most certainly is."

The blonde gave a moody huff, but stayed in the hug all the same.

She had just spent the best part of two days sewing.

There had been needles, there had been swearing, there had been cursing and magic causing things to shatter and explode.

She needed an embrace just to get past the trauma.


Authors Notes: I literally should have been out of the door and going to do some important stuff like TEN MINUTES AGO so I have to keep this short and sweet:

REVIEW BECAUSE YOU LOVE ME AND I LOVE YOU AND IT IS MUTUAL LOVE.

Asdfghjkl

HEARTS AND STUFF

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