Sometimes I forget how scary Hogwarts can be in the evening. The school is quite ancient and from time to time that piece of information slips out of my mind. At the moment, the corridors are empty, completely empty. This makes the place look even more old and haunted. But after dinner is over the emptiness will be gone… and the hallways will be alive once again.
Scorpius and Blaine are probably already at the Great Hall while I'm still stuck here walking, making my way through the vast place that is Hogwarts. To be honest, it isn't my fault that I'm not at dinner yet. The person that sat behind me, Leon Finnegan, messed up his potion which may or may not have made his cauldron explode. And guess who Reagan picked on to stay after and clean the mess with him? Me. What have I ever done to Finnegan?!
Sighing to myself, I turn the corner. I am so worn out (it had been a long day) that I don't notice the sound of soft weeping till it is only a few feet away.
The weeping isn't from an 'it', though.
No…
..Wait…
Is that…
… Aaliyah?
I walk towards her. She doesn't notice me.
Her hair- that is in what looks like a bun- is coming out in loose tendrils. It is slightly frizzy and falling into her eyes. Her shoulders are hunched down in forlornness.
I take a few more steps closer.
She notices this time.
She looks up, eyes wide. She tries to wipe away the tears as quickly as possible but they keep falling. She stares at me with her dark gray eyes and I stare back with my sharp green ones.
"Aaliyah…" I reach out for her but my hand freezes before I touch her face, her skin.
Nothing happens. For a few seconds- just a few - nothing happens. No breathing, no movement, nothing. And then the next things happens so quickly, too quickly for me to comprehend…
Aaliyah has me backed up against the wall. Her hands are on my collar and her forehead is pressed against mine. She leans on me heavily, her breathes crashing down on my face. Screw personal space, I guess.
"Aaliyah…"
"Kiss me." My eyes widen. Now this I didn't expect. Not in a million years.
"Aaliyah, are you-" she cuts me off.
"Shut up. Shut up and just kiss me," she mutters fast. She sounds so desperate and alone and , worst of all, broken. This is serious, really serious.
She squeezes her eyes shut. This causes more tears to fall down her pale cheeks. Drops of water cling to her long lashes and her freckles contrast against her skin. Her body shakes against mine like the vibrations of a beating drum.
This isn't good.
This is so not good.
...but at the moment, I'm frozen. I don't move, all I can do is watch her- watch her start to break down in pieces. Come on, Potter. Get a hold of yourself.
Finally, when I regain my senses, I raise my hand to touch her. My skin meets hers and her eyes flash open from the contact. My eyes bore into a whirlpool of blurred gray, grassy green, and misty blue. Her eyes show a muddle of emotions and a swirl of different shades. I can't make out many of the emotions I see. Maybe surprise? Maybe grief? Maybe… fear?
"Aaliyah…" my words die out because she presses against me even more. if that is even possible. I can feel her lips lingering on mine. I try to draw back.
"Aaliyah, you aren't in the right state."
"Please," she whispers, her voice small.
I cup her face into my hands and tilt her head so she can look me in the eyes, and focus only on my eyes, not on my lips. "Aaliyah, you don't want this. You aren't thinking straight. You know that. I know that. Something has happened… don't try to deny it. You can tell me… o-okay, Aaliyah… are you okay?"
She doesn't answer. Closing my eyes, I breathe out a sigh and when I look at her again I know what to do. I slowly pry her off me so I can take her hand. I glance up and down the hallway to make sure no one is there; we don't need any eyes to have witnessed this and we don't need any mouths to tell this to Ronan. Not now. Not ever.
I lead her into an empty classroom nearby. I let her hand go to lock the door securely. When I turn, I see that she has already moved away from me and taken a seat on the ground on the other side of the room.
The room is a dark one with little light from the fading sun shining through a single window. A few tables are pushed up against the left wall, clearly abandoned. Tattered books are stacked in one corner and the other corners have some dust clinging to them.
I sit next to Aaliyah on the floor. I give her some space, a feet of space. I press my back to the wall and take a sideways glance at her. She doesn't turn to do the same. Her eyes are directed to the front of the room, but her mind seems somewhere else and I want to know where that somewhere else is.
"Aaliyah, please talk to me," I say as softly as I can. She doesn't answer.
"Aaliyah, what happened?" She still doesn't say anything.
Her knees are bent and curled up to her chest. Her hair is now out of her bun and is cascading down around her like a barrier. Her uniform is wrinkled slightly and her tie is no where to be found. (Maybe she didn't have it on today?) And… she isn't crying much anymore only an occasional tear or two.
These details are what I notice as watch her. I watch her for a long time. And soon she starts to watch me back.
She peers at me strangely with her glassy eyes that start to water once again.
"Come here," I say gently.
She jumps back in surprise. "Huh?" Aaliyah asks confused. She blinks at me, unsureness in her eyes.
"Come here," I repeat.
She tilts her head at me, still bewildered and a tad thoughtful. Then, she crawls into my lap slowly like an afraid bear, like she isn't sure if she is falling into a trap or not. I wrap my arms around her cautiously and she tucks her head into the crook of my neck. Her heartbeat is steady and as is mine. Her nose tickles my chest. It doesn't take too long before she starts to talk.
"He came to me today."
"Who?"
"F-Fred." She stops before she continues, " he cornered me after class. He s-said he w-wanted to speak to me alone."
Aaliyah stumbles over her words and tears start to soak into my shirt. "He told me that I… s-shouldn't be using h-his cousin t-to get… to him like that. A..and he knows I still have feelings for h-him and that h-he made a horrible mistake by l-letting me go."
I peer down at her and she peers up at me nervously. Never had I ever thought I would see someone look as vulnerable as she did in that moment and I wanted to punch Fred in the face for causing it. He had no right to talk to her alone. No, not after he cheated on her and broke up with her afterwards. James told me that he never gave her a full explanation on why he did it. So why did he want to tell her now? It is way too late for that. Far too late.
The next part came out in an afraid whisper:
"He said h-he...he...l-loved me… and that... that is why he cheated on me. He said he got sc-scared and ac-acted out. Why would he do that? Why tell me n-now? W-why after all t-this time w-would he d-do that?"
She keeps repeating this to herself a couple more times as if she thought that the more she said it, the less she would believe or the more it would make sense.
She hides herself, face buried into my button-up. I feel her chest rise up and down against my own. And her fingers lightly trace the buttons on my shirt. For some reason that comforts me. It comforts me to know that she is still breathing normally and that crying and thinking isn't the only thing Aaliyah is doing… she is also trying to distract herself.
"That isn't what scared you, is it?" I voice. Her head tilts up. This tells me that she is hearing what I have to say. "It isn't that he said he loved you that scared you. You saw something else. You saw that he truly loved you and wouldn't give up on you. It was in his eyes, wasn't it?"
I wait for a reply and instead, I get a nod.
A silent extends between the two us. One that hangs there like it was there for a reason. And the silence gives me some time to think, something I haven't been doing through this whole whirlwind.
Aaliyah Herseth is in my arms.
Willingly.
And I am comforting her.
Willingly.
And I am okay with that.
Well, isn't that peculiar?
I take another glance down at her to make sure I've got this all done right. She's still there but her attention isn't on her surroundings. Instead, she is consumed with her thoughts just like me.
She's always seemed quite big to me with her height being somewhere around 5'8" but now she seems small, delicate. She herself is fragile but her eyes give off a strong determination to not break, to not let Fred get to her like this. This makes me admire her.
I notice her hand has a fist full of my shirt in it. How had I not noticed this before? She clutches on to it, not letting go. This reminds me of Gabby. I don't know why. It just does. This is the first time that I see her sister in her. They are nothing alike in looks or personality. But this action brings Gabby back. Maybe it is because Gabby would have been like this given the situation at hand. Gabby would be clinging on to her sanity just like Aaliyah is doing now. I guess they are really sisters after all.
"You're right," Aaliyah admits breaking my train of thought. I didn't think that she would speak again so this takes me by surprise.
"I am?" I inquire, trying to get her to keep talking, to keep holding on.
"Yeah, you are. And it isn't only that though. I was scared of something else too." She doesn't face me as she talks.
"Scared of what?" I breathe out, curious and afraid of her answer.
This time her concrete-colored eyes hold on to my gaze. They are vividly clear; clear like when a storm disappears to let the sun shine through. "Scared that I was going to give in . Scared that if I let myself, I would start falling for him all over again." Her tone then shifts to a guilt-ridden one. "He tried to kiss me and...I was going to kiss him back, Al. I almost did… and I feel so bad for that… I feel a pit grow in my stomach every time I think about it. I'm so sorry, Al." She shakes her head ashamedly.
She's saying sorry to me. She's saying sorry to me over something she couldn't control and over something she didn't end up committing. Wow… sometimes I forget how innocent she is.
I kiss the top of her head and rest my chin on the top of her head. "You don't need to say sorry for that. It wasn't your fault. And… please don't blame yourself. You were just being human. And if I was girl, I would probably want to kiss Fred too. He is mighty fine," I finish off, bringing some light-hearted humour in to cheer her up. I hear her chuckle softly and I smile down at her. Aaliyah wraps her arms around my waist loosely and snuggles closer, a small,sad smile playing on her lips.
It isn't long before she dozes off. And soon enough, I do the same with my arms still tightly woven around her, trying to protect her from the world.
A/N: I actually wrote this a long time ago. I had this scene planned out really early on and one day I just sat down and typed it all out before I lost all the elements that went into this long scene. Even though it is only one scene I really did feel like this needed to be a stand alone chapter just because I feel that this is a big moment. I really hope I did justice to it. Now I won't ramble any longer and waste your precious time but if you do have the time please drop a review with your thoughts. I would love to hear them!
