Chapter 11
A Home With Me
A day later Galinda sits beside Elphaba on an old log buried deep in the forest, somewhere just east of the Vinkus River. They share a small loaf of bread Elphaba had stashed in their survival pack. The sun is high, but the temperature is cool beneath the thick layer of foliage above. Galinda watches as a breeze blows through the trees, sending a small collection of leaves floating down around them. It's quiet save for the sounds of the wind.
Tranquil almost, but not alarmingly so.
It reminds Galinda of afternoons spent near the stream behind her family's cottage in Mottica with her Ama. She'd splash around in the shallow water for hours, pretending to be on some grand adventure. A rescue usually. Princesses always needed to be saved by other princesses. Galinda smiles thinking of the memory. Even as a girl she already knew what she wanted.
Poor Fiyero never stood a chance, she thinks. Princes were only ever useful for leading her to Princesses. She sighs, thinking of the man she is to marry soon. It's not that she doesn't care for Fiyero. She does, more than she will ever even admit. He is the only friend she's ever had that didn't befriend her in a feeble attempt to better his own social standing (what little of it there was). If anything his status was diminished by her company. But he seemed not to care, not in the slightest that he was pursuing a poor nobody. Despite her shortcomings he was always there when she needed someone most. And just like with Arria, she never let him see any further than just below the surface. Barely skimming the waters. She never allowed them deeper.
Theirs was a casual friendship, built on respect surely, but also built on a shared familiarity. They helped each other remain sane during those long hours spent out in Morrible's training trials. During meals he was the only one to brave sitting beside her without fear of being verbally torn in two.
He knew how to make her laugh, and which style of bow she preferred for the range.
He had no clue what she feared, what she truly wanted.
He will always be the charming, patient, kind-hearted man she met at the start of their time at Academy. Even as he proposed he was all soft smiles and gracious words.
She still can't believe he asked her, of all people. Her.
How many times has she insulted him? Thrown a complete fit over nothing and then raged at him for merely breathing? Struck him for being an insufferable know-it-all, even? And yet she always found him waiting outside her door the very next day, ready to apologize first. He never gave up on their friendship. Galinda appreciated him for that.
But when it came to their affair she resented who she came to be because of it. Or, more accurately, who she pretended to be… just so that he would have the version of her he'd always wanted all along.
The perfect girlfriend. Someone to match his strength of will, challenge his wit, slight his vanity and most important of all, someone who wanted him. She played her part well.
Galinda feels horrible for stringing him along. Never once did she stop to think how much she could be hurting him by pretending to love him as she did. She was only ever looking out for herself.
It was always what was best for Galinda.
Never a thought was spared for those around her.
To those that cared for her…
Not until Elphaba.
She spent so long lying to Fiyero that she never once wondered if the man was actually in love with her as much as she pretended to be with him. He certainly seemed to be in love whenever they slept together. Sweet Oz, his need to cuddle afterward was so unbearable! But he was always so flirty with other girls, even despite their secret relationship.
Galinda couldn't image flirting with anyone if Elphaba were hers.
Her eyes widen as that forbidden thought crosses her mind.
She shakes her head, focusing on why she's here on this log.
This isn't just any ordinary break they're taking. Galinda stopped here purposefully. She noticed Elphaba itching at her side again; the green girl is in obvious need of some fresh bandages. Galinda just doesn't know how to approach the subject without causing Elphaba to grow nervous and fidgety. She saw how the green girl was barely able to compose herself with the doctor. She still can't believe she allowed him to even glance at the wound let alone stitch her skin up.
Elphaba's skin is beautiful, even with the scars, Galinda thinks.
Now how to say this to Elphaba without freaking the girl out?
Galinda groans inwardly. There is no easy way to ask Elphaba to lift her shirt so she can re-bandage her stomach.
She tries not thinking about the green skin in any other way then medically. She's just here to check on a wound. This is just another typical survival class. Elphaba is just another student.
She can do this.
She can keep pretending.
Elphaba passes Galinda their water canteen and Galinda thanks her with a nod, taking a sip before handing it back to Elphaba for safekeeping.
"Shall we move on?" Elphaba asks as she straps the small bottle back along the edge to the survival pack.
"I think we shou' reban'age your-side!" Galinda says all at once. She curses the blush that spreads quickly to her cheeks.
"I didn't quite catch that," Elphaba says, amused by Galinda's sudden embarrassment. What could Galinda be possibly nervous about?
Galinda looks up at Elphaba then down to the girl's side. She points and tells her, "Your side. We should change the bandages."
Elphaba's shoulders tense, her eyes flicking between Galinda's. "No, it-it's ok. I'm fine."
"Elphie," Galinda sighs, having anticipated this reaction. "It's all right. You don't have to be scared, it's just me."
"Exactly," Elphaba tells her as she shoots up to her feet. She smoothers down her blouse and reaches to collect their bags. Galinda stops her though, wrapping her fingers gently around Elphaba's wrist. Elphaba meets Galinda's soft eyes, allowing the blonde to guide her back down to the log. She tears her eyes away, down to Galinda's hand that has slipped to cover hers. Elphaba closes her eyes at the touch.
Galinda is her friend.
She only wants to help.
She trusts her...
"Okay," Elphaba says softly with a slight nod of her head. "Okay, but if-"
Galinda silences her with a small squeeze of reassurance to Elphaba's hand. "You have nothing to be ashamed of. Nothing."
Elphaba keeps her eyes on Galinda, concentrating on the simple act of breathing as the blonde pulls Elphaba's blouse out from her skirt. A warm smile tugs at the corner of Galinda's mouth, her eyes never leaving Elphaba's as she raises the shirt up. Her knuckles brush against the bandage, Elphaba's stomach flinching at the touch. When Galinda no longer feels the rough material of the wraps but instead the smooth skin of Elphaba's side she stops.
"Could you hold this here for me?" Galinda asks.
Elphaba nods, pulse racing as she takes her shirt and continues holding it just below her ribs. Galinda gives her a smile before digging into the survival pack, pulling out some fresh dressings and a small jar of ointment. She rests both in her lap before starting to unwrap the old dressing from Elphaba's stomach. Elphaba takes a deep breath and focuses her attention to the sky. She really doesn't want to see Galinda's reaction once the wraps are undone.
Once her scarred skin is plainly on display.
But as the last of the bloodied bandages leaves her skin and the cool air tickles her exposed stomach, Elphaba doesn't hear the gasp she was expecting from Galinda. She hears nothing at all.
Elphaba looks down, surprised to find Galinda about to smoother some ointment over her stitches, the blonde's brow furrowed in concentration. She wants to laugh. Oz, she feels like she could cry even! The ointment is cold and as Galinda gently spreads it over the healing wound Elphaba can't help as her body twitches in reaction. Nor the way a fluttering, almost tingling sensation seems to float down and settle in her stomach.
"Are you okay?" Galinda asks suddenly, eyes flicking up to meet Elphaba's, the worry in them clear as the glass of the jar in her hand. "I didn't hurt you, did I?"
Elphaba shakes her head, wobbly smile on her lips. "No," she says. "Thank you, for doing this."
Galinda gives Elphaba a full smile as she leans into the green woman, wrapping the clean bandages behind her back before settling back on the log once again. Elphaba swears her heart just skipped a beat. Or two. Perhaps three. Each time Galinda leans forward, another beat is missed. That is until Galinda stills, the bandage still clutched in one hand as the fingers of her other trace over a deep scar just above Elphaba's hip.
Galinda feels like she had been doing great at keeping her feelings at bay. She's been suppressing the urge to just hug Elphaba since the last of the bandages were unwrapped. But this one, this one horrible scar has her very heart breaking. Galinda's seen what happens when wounds aren't properly taken care of. They take longer to heal leaving an ugly mark behind. This wasn't a simple cut. This was deep. Invasive. This hurt. And afterward… afterward, this was ignored. The scar is raised higher than all the others, jagged and discolored.
This was never cared for.
Galinda clenches her teeth. This shouldn't be here in the first place.
"How could you have let him treat you this way for so long?" Galinda whispers, voice pained. She looks up at Elphaba, eyes wet with unshed tears. "How?"
Elphaba looks away. "I knew it was for the better of Oz," she explains softly. "If my one moment of pain could lead to the freedom for all, then I was willing to endure it. Sometimes I thought I even deserved it."
"No," Galinda says, with an adamant shake of her head. "No one deserves to be treated like that. Especially not someone like you. You're such a good person, Elphie. Oz, I swear sometimes I think your heart is the purest thing left in this world."
Elphaba feels a rush of warmth course through her veins, the heat settling deep in her gut. She blushes as she tells Galinda, "I don't understand how you can think your soul is dead after saying something like that."
Galinda chuckles, wiping at her eyes with the back of her hand. She brushes Elphaba's blouse back down. "I'm not this way with anyone else," she admits. "Academy tended to weed out the weak."
Elphaba tucks her blouse back into her skirt as she looks down to Galinda. "From everything you've told me of Academy it sounds like a horrible place."
Galinda shrugs, helping Elphaba up from the log. "I assure you, it was far better than being a human guinea pig. If I ever meet your bastard father I'm so going to run my dagger straight through his heart."
"Don't," Elphaba says as she slips her research bag over her shoulders, the survival pack next. "I don't want anymore bloodshed because of me and besides, if I hadn't let him keep doing his experiments then I never would have discovered the truth about the Undead's origins. Sure, it would have been wonderful to not have been a human guinea pig, but it's because I chose to stay with him that I find myself here now. I would do it over in a heartbeat if it meant I'd still get to meet you."
Galinda doesn't know what to say to that. Does Elphaba feel the same as she does? It certainly seems that way. Friends don't exactly confess they'd be willing to suffer through pure agony just to get the chance to come across you again. But than again this is Elphaba. Everything she does is atypical, why would being her friend be any different? So Galinda gives Elphaba a smile as they begin walking.
"I still think you deserved to be treated better," she says. A horrible thought suddenly plants itself into her mind and she quickly asks, "I hope you're not thinking of going back to him when this is all over. You're not, right?"
"I don't want to," Elphaba sighs, looking to the ground. "But he's still my father Galinda, all I have left anymore. I can't change that, no matter how I despise him so. Where else could I go...?"
"Not back to him," Galinda tells her with conviction. "He's not all you have anymore."
She'll be damned it she lets Elphaba go back to the bastard. Not when she's far better off with her.
Hours later and Elphaba still can't stop thinking about what Galinda last said to her. The blonde hasn't breathed so much a sigh after she told her, in a not so many words, that Elphaba could stay with her when this was all said and done. It's the biggest gift Galinda could have ever given her. To be free, have a friend and a home? It's more than Elphaba could have wished for.
Oz, it's more then she's ever dreamed for herself.
She won't let anything ruin this.
Not even the nerves that threaten to overwhelm her at the sight of the overturned carriage along the dirt road ahead. She swallows her fear down, burying it deep into her gut. She won't let herself turn into a whimpering mess.
A stench quite unlike any Elphaba's ever encountered before reaches the girls. She chokes on the air, sputtering as she coughs. Galinda merely scrunches her nose in disgust.
Sweet Oz, what is it? Elphaba thinks as she covers her nose and mouth with the sleeve of her blouse.
"Stay here," Galinda tells her, pulling her bow from off her shoulder.
"Now or never," Elphaba mumbles to herself. She reaches out quickly, stopping Galinda before she can get too far. Elphaba lowers the sleeve from over her face. "I want to come with," she tells her.
Galinda shakes her head. "No, you're safer here."
"I'm safer with you," Elphaba insists. "And I could… help?"
Galinda wonders where this boldness is coming from. It's quite unlike Elphaba to want to walk into danger. Let alone one that is so obvious. But Galinda also knows Elphaba is right. She is safer by her side. So she nods, relenting, and together they make their way slowly to the broken caravan.
Elphaba wishes she had stayed the minute she sees the bloody, torn-up remains of the clearly feasted upon carriage owners. She turns away, repressing the urge to vomit by clapping her hands tightly over her mouth. Galinda cringes at the sight. The bodies are still fresh, blood dripping from the numerous bite marks.
She knows what must be done.
Without pause Galinda takes out her dagger and rolls up her sleeves as she makes her way over to the dead bodies. Elphaba watches from a distance as Galinda quickly beheads each one. Once the blonde is done and her blade clean once more she returns to Elphaba's side.
"Have you always been like this?" Elphaba asks her, dismayed. "So methodical?"
Galinda doesn't know what that means but she does know what Elphaba is bothered by. She had to sever their heads. They would have turned otherwise. It's what she was taught to do. Galinda doesn't know how to turn her training off. She sighs, "I don't remember how to be any other way."
Elphaba takes first shift that night, wanting to prove to Galinda, and more so herself, that she isn't hopelessly useless. So while Galinda settles down, stomach full from the last of the bread, Elphaba collects some sticks.
"You're not thinking of building a fire, are you?" Galinda asks through a yawn as she lies along the grass.
Elphaba shakes her head, sitting down a few feet from the blonde. She places the sticks in front of her, all in a neat little line. "I'm going to try levitating them." Elphaba explains, and then gives Galinda a smile. "I did promise to teach you magic one day, didn't I? I best start trying to learn myself then."
Galinda giggles softly, letting her head snuggle further into the bunched-up blanket. "Don't think too hard."
"Yes I know. Prime brain, Undead magnet. Got it," Elphaba says with a smirk.
"Again with the sarcasm."
"I've never had a chance to use it much," Elphaba says. Then chuckles as she adds, "I like it."
Galinda smiles lazily, eyes finally heavy with sleep. "That's nice, Elphie," she mumbles.
"Fresh dreams, Galinda."
Galinda mutters back something so unintelligible that Elphaba isn't quite sure it's in any of the languages spoken in Oz. She finds it adorable nonetheless, and then scolds herself for thinking of Galinda in such a manner. Galinda deserves someone wonderful. She deserves someone better than you.
Even repeating her mantra still doesn't stop her from wishing otherwise.
Thankfully though, she has something with which to distract herself.
While Galinda sleeps soundly, Elphaba focuses on trying to raise the smallest stick. She closes her eyes and thinks about its weight, how easily it fits in her palm. She pictures it in her head vividly, right down to the torn piece of bark hanging from one end. And then she imagines it raising, slowly, just barely brushing the ground.
When she opens her eyes though, all she can do is groan, for the stick is lying along the ground, still as ever.
For being so supposedly powerful she feels incredibly insignificant. A stick has bested her. Elphaba sighs deeply.
A small cloud of air appears in front of her lips. The vapor disappears just as quickly as it formed.
It can't be that cold outside, Elphaba thinks. She hardly feels a chill! She looks down to Galinda, noticing for the first time that the blonde is curled tightly in on herself, brow wrinkled. Elphaba scoots over, touching the tips of her fingers to Galinda's hand, reeling at the cool temperature of the blonde's skin. Elphaba doesn't understand what's happening but Galinda is obviously freezing. She's careful not to wake the woman as she pulls the blanket out from under her head, replacing it with the survival pack. Elphaba unfolds the fabric, letting it fall over Galinda's body.
The blonde visibly relaxes under the thin material, curling around the warmth it provides. It takes everything in Elphaba's power to keep from reaching out and brushing the stray loose curls from Galinda's cheek. She doesn't want to disturb Galinda further, not now that she's finally found comfort in her dreams.
A light snow begins to fall as Elphaba sits back down in front of her sticks. She's seen snow before, countless times. Winters in the Emerald City were always harsh and she had no fireplace in her room to keep herself warm during those long nights. Elphaba hates snow. She hates how it makes her feel like she's right back in that attic room again, shivering and wishing her life were different.
But being in the snow now, with her friend a mere foot away… well, Elphaba doesn't think it's all so bad. Her nose crinkles as a flake lands along the tip, melting just as soon as it touches her skin.
As much as Elphaba hates snow, she also remembers being quite enthralled with it as a child. It was hardly ever cold enough to snow in Colwen Grounds. The closest she ever got to seeing it was when the sky would cloud and sleet would rain down. Nanny would keep her inside those days and tell her stories of the snowdrifts in the North.
As a child Elphaba used to think there couldn't be anything better than jumping into a pile of that snow. As she looks down at Galinda, she wonders if the blonde ever indulged herself like that as a little girl. Elphaba has a hard time imagining what Galinda must have been like then. All she thinks about is a short child clad in little combat boots, chasing after a duck with a miniature bow and arrow.
Elphaba smirks at the thought. Only instead of chasing the duck, Galinda would have obviously been fleeing.
Elphaba feels so warm when she thinks of Galinda. In fact, right now, she feels incredibly warm. Warm, safe and most importantly, cared for. There's a thin layer of the fluffy ice collecting along the ground. The sticks are now forgotten, and covered. Elphaba stands to her feet, watching the snow silently fall around the sparse forest. It's hardly a forest at all, Elphaba remembers thinking when Galinda first picked it as their camp.
It's more like a few scattered trees in some abandoned farmer's old crop field. The house was burned long ago, all that remains standing is its stone fireplace. Elphaba can barely make out the tall chimneystack from way out in the field. The snow obscures the shape.
Elphaba walks a bit into the field, careful to keep Galinda always in sight. She sits down in the snow, digging her fingers deep into the cold ground. And then she feels it again. That same warmth she gets when she's around Galinda. Only now it makes her tired instead of alert.
And before Elphaba knows it, her back rests against the ground, eyes staring up into the dark sky above. The snow keeps falling, ever so softly, lulling Elphaba swiftly into sleep.
Galinda wakes up groggy the next day a little after dawn. The snow layer upon the ground surprises her but that pales in comparison to the lack of Elphaba in her sight. Galinda's senses snap awake at the realization. Something must have happened, she thinks. It's morning! Elphaba was supposed to have woken her hours ago for her shift. Worried, and in serious panic, Galinda quickly grabs her bow and arrow, not bothering to slip on her boots as she takes off into the wet field.
She barely makes it three steps before she trips over something in the snow. Her body lands sprawled in the field, face buried in slush. But she doesn't care, because as she was flying through the air, she distinctly heard Elphaba yelp. Galinda scrambles to her feet, socks soaked as she turns around.
Elphaba is sitting up just in front of her ready to launch into a lengthy apology. She can't believe she's let Galinda down, yet again. But before she can even open her mouth to utter a syllable the blonde tackles her to the ground, squeezing Elphaba tightly in her arms.
"Thank fucking Oz," Galinda breathes against her neck. And Elphaba feels her whole body heat as she realizes Galinda is actually hugging her. The blonde pulls away slightly, hovering above Elphaba as she checks the woman's body over, searching for injury, bruises… bites. Oz, she hopes that's not what she'll find!
"Galinda," Elphaba says, voice raspy, wind knocked clear from her lungs by Galinda's forceful pounce. Once Galinda locks eyes with Elphaba she tells her, chuckling, "I'm all right."
"What were you doing way over here?" Galinda asks, mind clearly still in a panicked state if her anxious tone and darting eyes ares any indication. "Why were you buried in the snow? What happened? Did some Undead come, is that why? We're you hiding? Are you hurt? Were you bitten?"
Elphaba can't help it. The laughter escapes before she can bite her lip to keep it back. Galinda furrows her brow in confusion. Her questions were valid! What if Elphaba was hurt?
"I'm fine," Elphaba assures her, smiling sincerely. "I didn't want to wander far from your sight so this is as far as I dared to go. I just got caught up in old memories I guess," she says softly. She looks down, upset for having failed Galinda at a task so simple. "I'm sorry for being so careless."
Galinda feels the adrenaline pumping through her veins subside at Elphaba's confession. All that's left in its wake is a tingle along her skin. She doesn't even realize she's still on top of Elphaba. Not until she sees a puff of air materialize just above Elphaba's lips. Galinda gulps, heat pouring to her stomach once she feels Elphaba shiver below her. Elphaba, who seems not to care that Galinda practically is straddling her. But then Galinda swears she can see the girls cheeks growing greener and the way she's biting her bottom lip makes her look so kissable.
"I'm sorry, Galinda. I know you must be upset with me," Elphaba whispers, eyes still turned away.
Galinda realizes she's leaning down and stops herself. She straightens her arms quickly, putting distance between her and Elphaba. She can't have almost just… no, she wasn't about to… Galinda shakes her head clear of those thoughts before they can manifest further. Then she picks herself up to her feet before the heat in her belly can move elsewhere. She busies herself with brushing the snow from her trousers, shaking her hands, desperate to rid the tingles still dancing across her fingers.
"It's fine," Galinda tells Elphaba, halfheartedly admonishing the green woman as she makes her way back to their things.
If Elphaba was confused before, she's even more so by Galinda's lack of reprimand now. Since when does Galinda just let something so important slide right off her shoulders?
Elphaba stands to her feet and is about to ask if she's the one not feeling all right when Galinda asks first, "How's your side doing?"
"Much better," Elphaba replies, still a bit stunned by Galinda's non-action. She blinks a few times before accepting the rolled up blanket Galinda is holding out to her.
"Good. We shouldn't be far from the Vinkus River now so let's get on our way."
"Uh huh," Elphaba nods absentmindedly, falling into step beside Galinda once she's collected their bags. Galinda is certainly behaving…. Odd this morning, she thinks.
As they make their way from the farm all Elphaba can think about are how strange friendships seem to be a well.
Galinda wishes she could turn her brain off. Ever since this morning, since she almost kissed Elphaba... Yes, she admits it now, that's exactly what her traitorous lips were about to do. Oz damn them. Well, ever since then that's all she can think about doing. She just doesn't understand why all of the sudden she feels this... this excited about Elphaba. She keeps trying to remind herself they are nothing more than friends. Barely new friends at that!
And besides, in a few weeks she will be marrying Fiyero. So what do her feelings matter anyway? She can ignore them…Okay, maybe not ignore but at the very least just not act upon them. Sweet Oz, she thinks to herself, this shouldn't be so hard!
Galinda makes the mistake of glancing over to Elphaba. The green girl is eating an apple she picked from one of the farm's trees. When she notices Galinda staring she offers the blonde a bite. Galinda shakes her head, quickly focusing her attention ahead. She groans inwardly as another thought of Elphaba bubbles into her head. This one proclaims how cute the girl looks when she's chewing. Chewing? Really Galinda? she berates herself. She wonders if this is what all people utterly enamored by another feel like… or if maybe she's just crazy.
She hugs her arms across her chest as she continues walking, the temperature of the air dipping ever lower. "Is it just me, or is it getting colder?" she asks.
Elphaba offers a shrug taking the last bite of her apple and tossing the core to the tall snow-dusted grass below. She feels perfectly fine.
Galinda stops suddenly. It shouldn't be getting colder, she thinks. They are headed toward the Vinkus, to the hot lands where in the dead of winter you still walk around in your summer skirts. Where sweat sticks to your skin throughout the summer months and you'll be lucky to go a day without suffering some sort of heat exhaustion.
"This isn't right," Galinda says, looking up to the grey sky. She squints, hairs rising along the back of her neck as she watches the clouds drift overhead. They're moving too fast for the lack of wind. Yet, subtly so. Easily unnoticed unless you know what you're looking for.
Galinda knows what she's looking at.
She's only ever seen weather behave this way in one other place.
And that was when Morrible was putting her students through rigorous environmental training.
