My name is Lil Gideon Gleeful: the cutest lil boy in all of Gravity Falls. Some would say my cuteness is a result of my dwarfism, but I just think they're just enamored by my bright personality, however, I AM aware of my condition and will remind people of it when needed. I often like to go to public places to make sure handicapped parking spots are being used properly and make sure buildings are properly handicap accessible.

One day, I was out at the local grocery store to foresee a water fountain.

"Well, it seems this fountain is much too high to meet to proper code here."

"But Gideon, we followed proper regulations and you can tell it's low enough that you can reach it."

I decided to get out my measuring tape.

"I'm sorry, but this fountain is just ONE centimeter too high for someone like lil ole me. Let me just—"

I then took my fist and busted the fountain off of the wall. Then handed the storeowner my card letting him know that if they don't meet proper regulations soon, I would certainly sue them in court.

As I was walking out of the store, I saw my old friend, Stanford Pines, pull up in his car right next to a handicap parking space, so I decided I'd pay him a visit.

"Why hello there, Stanford. I see one of your tires is touching the handicap parking space."

"Oh come on, it's HALF an inch on the line; not even enough to block any mobility."

"Seriously, Stanford? I would've thought someone who runs a camp for disabled children would be a little more sensitive towards such matters like this."

"Oh, you mean I should focus more on teaching my kids become scam artists like you? At least when I try to rip people off, I don't use my handicap as an excuse; the doctor says I shouldn't even be driving with my cataracts, but instead of paying some bum on the street minimum wage to take me places, I prefer driving myself."

"Even with that bear you tried to teach how to drive?"

"I was training it for my circus!"

"Oh sure, make up ALL the excuses you want, you hypocrite."

Stanford then came over to me, pointing his finger at me.

"Listen here you little Troll, I know what hardships are like and people like you who try to profit off of it disgust me."

I couldn't let my archrival get the best of me, so I decide to pull a lil ole trick I've been using for years.

"OH MY POOR HEART! CURSE MY GROWTH DISORDER WITH MULTIPLE HEALTH ISSUES ATTACHED TO IT THAT I HAVE NO CONTROL OVER!"

Everyone who was there came to my aide instantly as I collapsed to the ground.

"How DARE you be so heartless." Said one woman to Stanford, "Can't you see he's in pain?"

"Oh come ON; he's obviously faking it!"

"People don't fake their handicaps!" Said one guy, "I think YOU need to check your privilege before bullying someone less fortunate than you are!"

"HE OWNS HIS OWN MULTI-MILLION DOLLAR COMPANY; HE'S GOT WAY MORE PRIVILEDGE THAN I DO!"

"I think WE need to check his privilege FOR HIM!"

The mob then chased Stanford away while I was properly attended to. Boy, it's good to be lil ole me.