My god, I didn't think anyone actually enjoyed this. I'm touched. Well I'll try my best and hope it's not an utter failure.


We stood before a before a brick building that seemed as old as time itself. I looked cautiously at the tombstones and coffins that leaded against the walls of the shop. The sign above, stated Under taker, and was in danger of falling from the building. Sebastian held open the door and I wrinkled my nose at the smell.

"Hello?" Sebastian called out. A coffin that leaned against the wall, groaned as the lid was slid open a crack . A wide grin appeared along with a flash of yellow-green eyes.

"Why hello, Earl, long time no see." The grin's owner cackled, stepping out of the coffin. He re-crooked his top hat, that adorned his long gray hair. "It seems like just yesterday I prepared your funeral. Ah, I see Master Butler is here as well!"

"We're here on business, Undertaker. Not a reunion." Sebastian pointed out.

"You completely left me out of that, 'good to see you' thing! No fair, don't you want to see me?" Grell whined from his place on top of a coffin.

"Oh, I saw you last night, Grell." Undertaker grinned, munching on a dog bone shaped biscuit. "So, Earl. What brings you to my humble shop?"

"I'm sure you've heard of the copycat Jack the Ripper, well at least I hope you have, considering you prepared the bodies and all. And I was wondering if you could tell us about the bodies in question." I stated, taking one of the biscuits he offered.

" I need compensation, Earl."

" What would you like?" I asked, not surprised that I'd have to pay for the information.

"Only the choicest of laughter!" Undertaker grinned, rocking back and forth in excitement.

Sebastian sighed and went to speak. I raised a hand to stop him.

'Knock, knock." I said, starting off my joke.

"Who's there?" Undertaker asked, still rocking

"The police, your entire family died in a car accident."

Undertaker stood stunned a moment before letting out a laugh way too loud for the anti-joke I'd just told.

"That's so horrible, it's funny." Undertaker chuckled.

"So, tell us everything you know about the case." I demanded

"Grell did a much, much better job. The cuts were made with a dull knife, creating a jagged cut, and made it harder to get a deep enough one. The girls died most painfully. They were still alive when their wombs were removed." Undertaker stated. , pulling a cloth off a body to reveal the latest victim, he demonstrated as he explained. Grell blushed at the 'compliment', holding his face in his hands in pure delight.

"What do you think the weapon was?" I asked as he probed the dead prostitute

"Somethiiiinnggg...like this!" Undertaker replied rummaging through his drawers and pulling out a long, thin knife. He ran his finger over the edge and licked away the blood that trailed down his finger.

"Just a common kitchen knife? Well, thank you for your time, Undertaker."

Undertaker smiled largely once more "Good-bye Earl, and you as well Master Butler."

The door slammed shut behind us and I frowned at the sudden brightness of the sun. Sebastian held open the car door and I climbed in, followed by Grell.

"Sebastian."

"Yes, My lord?" Sebastian replied looking back at me in the rear view mirror

"Compile a list of suspects consisting of people who have no alibi, are medically trained, practice magic or have some sort of motive. Hurry with it if you could, Alex wants to go to the circus tonight."

"Right away my lord."