Disclaimer: We don't own Death Note or any of the characters, except for Dr. Stratton. He's all ours. ;) We also do not own the company N Hoolywood or Daisuke Obana.
Warning: LxLight, Mpreg, major OOCness, Rated M for adult content, very dark themes, sex, nudity and language. Please, no flames. You have been forewarned of the story's contents.
Tears In The Cradle
By Pain's Disciple
Co-written with UnderneathTheRose
Chapter Eleven: I'll Stand By You
Stratton shut the door behind himself, looking annoyed and tired. His eyes carried an irritated glare directed towards Ryuzaki personally. "You better have a really good excuse. I don't hop on private jets just because a father-to-be decides to have a panic attack."
Ryuzaki narrowed his eyes. "Hello to you too Dr. Stratton. Thank you for coming."
The doctor disregarded him, focusing his attention to Light. "How are you feeling? Any problems? There hasn't been anymore fighting has there?"
Light glanced guiltily at Ryuzaki's arm that rested just on top of the white bed sheets, remembering the deep scratches that he delivered to the detective who was only trying to help him. He confessed softly, "I may have hurt him a little.."
"Oh? What did you do?" The doctor turned back to Ryuzaki and, spotting the newly bandaged arm, lifted a curious eyebrow.
"We got into a fight." Light explained.
"I see." He said, eyeing the bandaged arm with disinterest. He turned back to Light. "I thought I told you not to argue with him anymore? In your condition that's dangerous."
Ryuzaki rolled his eyes at the doctor's over concern for his pregnant patient.
"It wasn't exactly a big argument." Light began, hesitating. "I'm not hurt. It was just, you know…"
Light's memories of himself and Ryuzaki rolling on the floor and fighting one another played like a bad movie in his head. Light's cheeks flushed at an after thought: Ryuzaki was naked under the sheets with his clothes strung around the room. Was it obvious they just had sex? Oh please, don' t let him notice…
Ryuzaki, who noticed the internal confrontation battling inside the one carrying his child, decided to help him out a little. "I overreacted to the news of his pregnancy. He was sticking up for himself."
"I said no physical fights. I don't care what he does Ryuzaki, you keep him safe. I mean it."
The dark haired detective scoffed. "He's pregnant, not a delicate flower."
"His condition is delicate. Haven't you been reading the information I gave you? I didn't give you pamphlets and a book so you could toss it all aside."
"I was unaware of 'information'." He gave Light an irritated glare.
The boy shrugged and mumbled, "It was my 'mystery books'. It's all under the bed."
The doctor sighed. "The two of you need better communication skills. Anyway, Light, why don't we go down to the infirmary? We can give Ryuzaki some time to get dressed while I give you a quick check up."
Light nodded, cheeks still flushed, and left following Dr. Stratton to the infirmary.
Ryuzaki kicked the sheets from his body, then swung his legs over the edge looking for his jeans. He found them across the room bundled up alone. Not caring about a shirt, the detective slipped himself into his now wrinkled jeans, buttoning them just as Watari entered the room with a gentle, concerned sounding knock that Ryuzaki had heard multiple times through out his life.
"Yes?"
"Ryuzaki, we need to talk."
"Yes, I suppose we do." Ryuzaki crammed his hands into the pockets and leaned against the wall waiting. Let the old man have his say, he thought. Let him get in a good lecture.
"Whatever you choose to do, I will support that decision."
What? Stunned, Ryuzaki straightened from a slouch to perfect posture. Watari…wasn't mad? "Thank you, Watari. Those words mean quite a lot coming from you."
"I'm not finished. I support you whether you choose to keep this child or not, however, I will not support you in any rash decisions. Think every possibility through. You have a pregnant suspect to take responsibility for, but you can not forget you have a case to solve."
Ryuzaki moved to sit on the edge of the bed, listening with a feeling of warm affection. Watari, who knew him better than anyone, always knew the right words to say, at exactly the right time. "Thank you, Watari. I will not forget my obligations, nor will I allow emotions to interfere with my work. In taking responsibility for my actions, I will take care of Light. You needn't worry yourself."
"I hope so."
"Everything will be okay. I won't disappoint you further."
Watari frowned as he looked at Ryuzaki's expression. Clearly, he felt he had somehow let Watari down. He had, but they would get through it. Ryuzaki-no, L-was still a good man, but deep down beneath a hard surface.
"I'd like some time alone, if that's alright." Giving a gentle nod of the head, Watari left as requested. He was the closest thing Ryuzaki had ever had as a father, for he could not remember his own, who had died long ago. He had also been like a mother to him. His biological parents were somewhat of a mystery. The only piece of information he truly had, was that his father was a sailor. He taught Ryuzaki the constellations. Even now Ryuzaki could lye outside for hours beneath the velvet night sky, searching for each and every one. And sometimes, the vacant, voiceless face that he knew to be his father, would haunt his dreams, keeping him awake at night.
Not wanting himself to get caught in memories he never had, Ryuzaki cleared his throat and pushed those last, sorrowful thoughts from his mind. To take his mind off of those thoughts, he leaned down over the bed, and found Light's 'mystery novels'. He pulled the bag out and reached inside finding everything.
The abortion pamphlet shocked him. The adoption pamphlet saddened and angered him. And the novel terrified him. This is must be what Light was mostly stressed over. Chooseing what to do. Should he keep the bay, or no? Ryuzaki could only imagine what Light faced on his own. What he must have thought of himself. Before Stratton's arrival, Light had asked him in that vulnerable little voice of his, what they were going to do. Ryuzaki knew no more than Light. He was just as scared as the teen, he just couldn't show it. Not to Light if he was going to be the rock Light would lean on, and he wanted to be that rock. That's what friends do, or what he assumed.
With books on his mind, he flipped the book "What to expect when your expecting" open. Light was eight weeks, so he skipped the first few chapters, then found himself grossly intrigued.
In the infirmary, Light was handed the dreaded hospital gown and told to undress in the infirmary's bathroom. He changed slowly, not exactly interested in the hospital gown. To him it was like a dress, and a dress just made him feel even more inferior.
While he removed his pants and unbuttoned his shirt for the second time that day, he starred at his reflection. Amber eyes starred back under messy bangs. Light lifted his hand straightening the strands to look perfect again. He was beautiful. His complexion was flawless. His eyes and smile were stunning. He could be a model. He could do that modeling job if Ryuzaki just gave him a chance.
Oh who the hell was he kidding? Looks fade… But they needed someone who was really capable, someone who knew the risks and had the brains. That person was Light, he just knew it.
And yet, his smile in the reflection faltered as he placed his hand over his abdomen. Ryuzaki was right, what about the little problem growing inside of his body? Since he has found out about this baby, he has been weighing every con and every pro, over and over again until his head felt like exploding.
Speaking of weight… Light, keeping his shirt lifted, turned sideways and examined his belly in the mirror. No real change in his weight as of yet. If he didn't know better, he'd say 'not pregnant'. But he did know better.
Sighing, he ran a finger from his belly button all the way down. Trying to imagine himself with a big, beach ball sized belly was impossible. He didn't get too much time to think on it as that lovely, wonderful need to vomit decided to kick in.
Hearing the teen upchucking in the restroom, Stratton moved to the door, his knuckles tapping gently. "Light? Light, are you okay in there? Need my help?"
The teen opened the door stepping out, the gown coming seductively to the tips of his knees. Stratton took in the sight before him. Light had an arm wrapped around his abdomen, the other just dangling at his side loosely, and he looked at Dr. Stratton beneath sweaty bangs. "Can I lay down?"
"Sure."
Light wiped his mouth as he moved to the bed stretching out on his back. He felt like he just puked up all of his energy. He just couldn't win no matter what was chosen in the end.
Stratton smiled as he approached the teen with his stethoscope. "I take it morning sickness is still underway. In just a few weeks you get to leave all this fatigue and sickness behind for the second trimester."
Light groaned and closed his eyes. "Great. I can't wait."
Stratton chuckled. He failed to understand how Ryuzaki could let Light be a one night stand. Light was beautiful, a wonderful person, and easy to fall for. Why was he not more than that? Sure, Ryuzaki was hard to get along with, and he was a detective who had to keep himself hidden from the world, but Light was an extraordinary person. It seemed the two were perfect for one another, if they would give each other a chance.
"Ah" Light gasped as the cold metal collided with his chest.
"Sorry. It's only for a few seconds." He was right, Light was relieved when the metal was gone. They went through the normal check up routine. Light thought they were done but Dr. Stratton pulled the stool up to the bed, brushing long strands of his black hair back behind his ear. "I wanted to wait to do this", he said, "for until after you made your decision. I felt like it would be too much on you. Lately though, I been thinking that it might be wrong to keep it from you, especially when it might help you reach a decision."
"What is it?"
"Well…" Stratton's pink lips turned up into a smile. "I thought we could do an early ultrasound. Would you be interested? I was waiting to do this until your twelfth week. But you look like you need it."
Light sat up on the bed as a wave of pain and fear he never felt before washed through his heart. He remembered going with his mother to get the very first picture of Sayu. Ten weeks in the womb and her nursery was already painted pink with a white crib near the window.
Here Light was, eight weeks and not sure if he was going to allow his baby to continue to live. He was not so sure he could face this child if he was going to be it's murderer.
"You don't have to Light, if you don't want to." Stratton laid a sympathetic hand on the boy's shoulder.
"No. I, I want to." It was true. He had a deep, odd feeling that if he didn't, he was being unfair to the baby in some strange way that he couldn't explain if his life depended on it.
Stratton's eyes lit up as he smiled. "Ok. I'll get you a towel to cover yourself with."
As Light watched the young doctor go into the bathroom, he wondered if he was doing the right thing, and where the hell Ryuzaki was. Light remembered his first visit with Stratton, and the night before. Just having Ryuzaki near was comforting. He may not love Light, but Light knew that deep down he cared for him, just like a friend should.
So where was he now, when he needed that comforting feeling?
"Here you are Light." Stratton entered back from the bathroom with a thick, white towel. "Just lift your hospital gown up to you chest, and lay this across your thighs. It'll keep you covered." He said, as he left to bring in the ultrasound machine.
Light lay left on the table alone in the room, exposed and cold. His shoulders shook as he realized somewhere there was a draft in the room. Or was he just so scared? Part of him secretly wished his mother or his father was there. Another part wanted even annoying, noisy Sayu, and a whole other side was screaming for Ryuzaki.
Ryuzaki always accused him of being popular and the one everyone adored and fell for, but if that were true, why was he pregnant and alone? Without a single friend?
Light could feel tears building up as his throat clenched. Don't cry again you idiot! How weak are you?
Without warning, soft, warm skin slipped into Light's hand that dangled over the edge of the examination table. Shocked, Light's eyes blinked past the forming tears to look straight up into deep, black eyes gazing into his own. A wave of comfort washed through Light's body as he realized they were holding hands, and he relaxed. That is until a heavy anger filled him from his toes to his sharp tongue.
"Where the hell have you been you bastard! I've been down here waiting on you. You're not even dressed. Where's your shirt?"
"Eyelids."
Light blinked. When his brain was able to register what Ryuzaki plainly stated, he stopped himself. He lifted his head slightly, tilting it just enough to give Ryuzaki a look over. "Wha-what did you say?"
"I said eyelids."
"Eyelids?"
"At eight weeks the fetus is developing eyelids. At four weeks the fetus already has eyes, including a retina that already has color. Our baby has eyes Light. It can see."
Light didn't know what to say. The baby has eyes? Colored eyes at that. He sat up, the gown sliding back down to his waist. Silently, he closed his eyes then brought his hand up to gently run a finger over the lids.
From across the room with the ultrasound, Dr. Stratton watched the two young men running their fingers over their own eyelids as if they just discovered their own bodies. He couldn't help but to smile when he saw Light's smile. He stepped further into the room. "It also has a tongue, ears, a nose and lips. Oh and don't forget toes are forming." Ryuzaki and Light's eyes widened in unison as the watched the doctor enter with the large machine and bottle of gel.
Light whispered, "Toes?" and looked down at his cream colored feet, and wiggled his perfectly even toes.
"Yes. At eight weeks the fetus is growing at a fast rate. The organs are growing, the heart has one valve but it's beating, pumping blood. The head is growing, the brain is developing quickly."
"The brain?" Ryuzaki asked. "It's developing so soon?"
"Yes, or of course. The brain is the first thing to start developing. You'll be surprised at how fast the fetus grows. And it happens right under your nose. You never see it." He plugged the machine up, then applied purple gloves to his hands. "Light if you will lie back down, Ryuzaki can adjust the bed so you can sit up somewhat, and watch what I'm doing."
Light laid back, taking a nervous, deep breath and fixing the gown and towel, exposing his stomach and lower abdoman. He waited for Ryuzaki to fix the bed, but when he looked up at Ryuzaki, the man was lost in a daze. Still holding his hand, Light jerked Ryuzaki down and used his free hand to pinch the man's open chest, and hard.
"Ow! What the hell was that?"
"A 'pinch for a pinch'. And you were dazing off. Now adjust my bed like he said. "
"You didn't have to pinch me."
"You could have worn a shirt."
Ryuzaki's hand clenched but a glare from Stratton stopped him. The detective sighed, and let his hand go limp before helping Light to adjust the bed.
This chapter took so long for multiple reasons. For the most part we couldn't decide on the baby. It's too early to know the gender, but still we would like your opinion. We want to get you, the readers, involved. So, go check out Pain's Disciple's profile and there you will find the poll. Go vote and tell us what you would like! (There are nine possibilities and you can vote up to three times. The poll will remain open for one week.)
Once again, thank you for reading! Oh and how neat is all the fetus/baby info? Of all things to grow first, it's growing toes! haha
