The next morning, the sun was a little too bright through the curtains; bright enough that my heart did a little jump and I leapt from the bed to my window; though the ground was still picturesque with snow the sky was a cloudless blue, the sun too low for any heat but bright enough that if I shut my eyes I could imagine myself lying on the beach back home. The brightened sky made my mood much perkier, as I found myself singing as I pulled my hair up into a migraine awakening ponytail and painted on my makeup. My clothes even highlighted my good mood as I put on a bright orange and cream patterned shirt with my usual skin-tight black jean assemblement. I even pulled on my heels, feeling that it was going to be a good day. Cath even noticed my bubbly mood, as I came down for breakfast.
'You look good pet, that shirt is fabulous!'
'Isn't it? Expensive as hell though!'
'You would know! Toast?'
'Yeah lush.' I said taking my seat at the table.
'Les rang last night when you were in bed.'
'Did he?' I said around a mouthful of crumbs.
'Aye he should be home in a week or so but then he's away again…'
'Aww why?'
'His mate Alan has set him and Les up on a job in Germany, a whole estate needing wired in.'
'How long will that take?!'
'A month or two, give or take… good money though better than over here.'
'Aww Aunt Cath…'
'We'll be fine, just be nice to have some family time, you know?'
'I know.'
That week followed a pattern: Wednesday he wasn't there, Thursday he wasn't there, Friday he wasn't there. As the week progressed I was more and more confident that I would be alone at my Religious table. Mrs Rowle was still droning on about Plato, a topic the others enjoyed but I found just a repeat of my previous year. Sam was still like a guard-dog, keeping attention away from me when needed, but never really leaving my side. Fact was I was finding myself more and more comfortable around him. Charlie had messaged me day in day out, rambling on about this and that wanting to know when I'd see him next- I'd realised instantly that I may have given myself an unwanted admirer. Singing was going good, we'd decided I would sing Ellie Goulding 'Love me like you do' which I was more than happy to sing- Fifty Shade of Grey an epic movie anyways, and honestly my crush on Jamie Dornan was going no-where soon. So that was going good but Friday lunchtime brought with the reminder of the beach trip. In all there was eight of us going, the girls in my car and the boys in Dan's- something Sam grumbled about- oh and Flossy and Benji (Flossy being Dan's dog and Benji Fran's).
Saturday dawned cold. Actually scratch that colder than cold. The reason for the beach was because Sam and Dan both had science projects and wanted to collect samples- something neither of them had alerted us too prior. For the majority of the morning I sat huddled against April both of us cuddled together on the icy rocks sharing body heat but as the day wore on I found that despite the cold the beach was ridiculously pretty, the coating of snow on the sand made it sparkling and glitter in the weak sun; whilst the sea was a furious monster, its waves charcoal grey and its depth cavernous. The dogs running, and barking playfully up and down the stretch made the place take on a warmth, one that was not so much physical much emotional- it was the warmth of being wanted, the warmth of friendship. We'd lasted at the beach a lot longer than any of us had expected, even buying ice-creams to eat with frozen hands- it had been ridiculously fun and it was nice to just be able to laugh with friends. The ride home had been a ball; the heater turned up full blast, and the radio echoing as the girls had sung off key renditions of all sorts of songs- the whole car had been alive with laughter.
Sunday had been a quiet affair, nothing in the way of exciting. I'd gotten on top of my homework and basically video called Dad and Mel for the majority of the day as they told me of the joys they'd found in Malan. I'd found myself more jealous than I'd hoped I would be when they discussed the amazing sights they'd seen, as my only addition to the conversation had been of my winter beach trip- something they'd found ridiculously hilarious.
And that's how things went, my friends were lovely and charming. My aunt was saddened to be without Les but the week Les came home was pretty much amazing, felt like a real family. Dad and Mel kept me updated on their trip, sending back on regular intervals designer garments and accessories. It was only Him, who was back but completely ignored me at all times. Didn't even look at me, my hair was no longer needed as a curtain between us, it was as if there was an invisible to me wall directly in the middle of our desk. Business was exactly the same we both attended but I didn't let my eyes wander near and him and neither did he to me- that's even if he was interested in me, which I very much began to doubt.
It was only in the week before February half-term that everything became weird. Rehearsals for the performance had been nightly for the last couple of weeks, the only difference with the coming week was we were performing in front of all the other performers. I was nervous, especially as the song wasn't exactly low key. The guys had their dance routine perfect, with Sam and Dan's artist overlay a perfect complement background and Martin and Reece's techno- beat was sick, in the most lethal way. I was nervous more so because they had each-other, and I was going up there solo… Monday I was full of nervous energy, my hand shook all day so much so that I was debating faking illness. The guys went first and apart from a few sniggering comments from some of His sluts, they got good feedback. The sluts did a dance too, well as much as wheeling round on the floor and pouting at the audience could be called a dance. There was a comedian and he was funny…I think- I didn't understand a lot of the jokes but he got a lot of laughs. There were a couple of other singers too, they were good- held the stage. One sung 'Hero', the other 'The other side'. I was last… by this point I was sickened with anxiety. I climbed onto the stage with trembling legs, my heart pounding in my chest; the over whelming feeling to run nearly overtaking my mind; but I held steady holding the microphone in my sweaty hand. Before the lights blinded me I looked out at the crowd the Slags were eying me distastefully but my lot were smiling encouragingly; Sam though had worry lodged in his eyes as he mouthed 'you'll be great' at me with a wink- his wink was soft and kind; not domineering and possessive like His. I took a breath and raised the microphone to my face, as the tune played out my breathing calmed; and I pictured myself just jamming in my room with Mel back home. The words came easy, my voice strong and powerful hitting the high notes without even a second of hesitation. I found myself adding to the song, making it my own- making it my performance, giving it everything I had; because ultimately I wanted to prove to myself I could do this. As the song ended and the lights fell down I was breathless and on top of the world; the music made me alive, made me feel. I looked at my guys to see them all smiling at me, whooping loudly- so was the other singers although they did look slightly crestfallen. The only people not clapping were the slags, although now they eyed me with a look of pure evil. It was as I began to relax I heard it. A steady clapping coming from the back of the hall, I looked up and there he was.
'Babe.' He purred.
Each of the slags turned expectantly, but pouted when they saw he was talking to me. I walked off the stage, feeling every pair of eyes on me, and found myself trip on the final step down. A hand caught me, a heavily muscled hand at that.
'Careful.' He purred.
'Talking to me again are you?'
'Could say that.'
'Could say that?' I questioned knowing every eye was focused on us, every ear trying to listen.
'Yeah…I've decided your too much to stay away from.'
'Meaning?'
'I would like to ask you on a date.'
'You have to be joking.'
'Do I look like I'm joking?'
'I really hope you are.'
'You wound me, now I'll ask again will you come on a date with me?' He purred the words, his voice taking on an edge that was entirely sugar sweet.
'No.' I said softly, dodging my way around him; although he caught my arm in the same way he'd done so in Religious studies a few weeks prior.
'No?'
'No. Oh and let go!' I said harshly.
'At least give me a chance.'
'What a chance to embarrass me? Or a chance to humiliate me? No I don't think so; go and find someone who wants you Arthur.'
'I wouldn't do that.' He said his tone hurt.
'I've seen no evidence that says you won't, you ignore me… you've belittled me- I'm sorry but no.'
And I walked away, down to my friends.
'What you all looking at?!' He'd shouted from behind making me jump. I never saw him leave but I knew this wasn't the end.
'OMG Cuthbertson has just asked you on a date!' April shrilled.
'OMG!' Fran and Annie squealed.
Reece and Martin were eyeing me carefully, whilst Dan was looking at me with worried eyes; it was Sam who took charge.
'Come on guys lets go get tea somewhere.' He snaked his arm around my shoulders, and I willingly huddled closer hiding my head in his chest- not really understanding what I had done. The guys babble blocked all my thoughts out, but I couldn't un-see all the eyes staring directly at me.
I couldn't sleep that night; I wasn't sure why but I knew for certain something had changed, the whole dynamic was different. He had not walked away defeated from my rejection, he'd asked me out again and then used his power to gain the attention – he controlled the school, I'd seen it… I knew it but something didn't add up; why me when he could have any of these girls to parade around with? The thought kept me awake the majority of the night, and if it hadn't of been for rehearsals I'd probably have skipped the rest of the week. I wore my confidence clothes that next day, the ones I wore when I needed to look strong. I wore another of my dresses, a tight button down; I paired it with thick woollen tights and my six inch heels- needing the confidence they gave me. My hair was in its usual slick back, take-no-prisoners pony tail; and my make-up was on-point enough so I even despite my mood selfied the moment. Having Sam in the car soothed me somewhat, knowing that he cared meant a lot and it dawned on me that I really did care about him.
'So what you going to do?' He said softly, as I finished my rant.
'What can I do? Look who he is and then look who I am…'
'Exactly look who you are.'
'Huh? I've been here a couple of months and hide behind you guys.'
'Not any more he has made you someone; have you not checked your twitter or Instagram or even facebook?'
'No.' I said dumbstruck, I'd purposely silenced the notifications on my phone not wanting to even be aware of the bitching.
'Well look!'
'Yeah… I'm driving remember?' I said smiling.
' … can I look then? I promise not to drool over your sexy pics!'
'You idiot, sure it's in the flap pocket at the front.'
He was quiet for a few moments, working the keys; before making a 'aha' sound.
'Look!'
' !'
'Right yeah, well listen! One hundred and eight friend requests. One hundred and twenty-two new followers on Instagram and twitter is the same- he has put you on the map. Everyone is asking who you really are; why not give them an answer?'
'I don't know Sam, you said leave him alone.'
'Only because he left us alone, now well he's made you interesting and we can't change that; at this school especially Arthur makes or breaks people- being interesting means he's given you power honey.'
'Power?' I asked sarcastically.
'Power.'
'Right so what do I do with this 'power'?'
'You rule the school.'
' .'
'Kate.'
'What so I'm supposed to be someone?'
'No Kate you already are someone.'
'Sam this isn't me.'
'Well honey since the day you started, things changed now we just have to deal.' I had no reply.
'Okay Kate I'm going to post a pic of you and watch this!'
'Sam!' But too late, he'd already posted the photo I'd took this morning.
'Sorry…' He said but I knew he didn't mean it, the smile on his face said it all.
'Well then at least post one of us, if I'm going to be interesting might as well give them something to gossip about!'
'Huh?' He asked confused as I pulled into my regular parking space.
'Selfie time!'
'I don't think so, I take the photos I'm not in them!'
'Shut up!' I laughed snatching my phone from his hand.
'Kate man…'
'Cheese!' I chimed as I clicked the screen, I posted the picture as he moaned.
'Hey if have to be interesting you have to be interesting too!'
'That's mean.'
'How do you think I feel?'
'Fair play.'
'Exactly.'
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