Chapter 11: Reciprocity
A breeze stirred the sluggish heat of the day, and Sesshoumaru allowed it to play in his pelt and stir mischievous fingers through his hair. But there was a disturbance somewhere in the area around him and after a moment of trying to decipher what that was, his gaze flicked downward; Tenseiga was rattling in its sheath.
Tenseiga... what has disturbed you?
He palmed the sword to calm it, his eyes narrowing as his senses locked on something... he watched, blinking slowly as a headless youkai pierced by many arrows and spears staggered up the hill towards him and then fell before him, no expression on his face.
That incarnation of Naraku...
It didn't take but a moment for the scents of his half-brother and his pack – and most importantly to him, Kagome - to permeate his sensitive nasal passages; they were heading right for him and he wondered what they were after. Were they coming to kill the body of the youkai? If so, it appeared it was too late.
He watched as his brother arrived, a young otter youkai pup with a large burden with them, and cocked a brow as that young otter immediately ran to the headless youkai and opened his bundle to reveal the missing head. The kitsune and the otter tried pushing the head into the youkai's neck, but it was too late, and the older youkai was gone.
No longer interested in what was going on as the little otter began to cry, he turned away and began to leave, intent on his quest. As much as he wanted to stay and take Kagome with him right then, it was not the time for that yet, for Naraku still walked on this plane and he was a danger to the woman he, Sesshoumaru, wanted. The spider had to be eliminated before he could have her - there was simply no two ways about it.
Knowing that it would be easier to walk away if he did not speak to her, he ignored everyone there – until his brother's suspicious voice halted him.
"Oi, Sesshoumaru – what the hell are you doin' here? I can't believe that you were just passing by."
Inhaling in order to gather his control, already tested just by Kagome's presence, he turned his head and eyed his brother over his shoulder. "I do not owe you any explanations, Inuyasha." Keeping his gaze off of his female was almost impossible, but just as he turned and once more tried to walk away, she spoke; he closed his eyes, sighing inwardly as he waited for what she was going to say.
"Please... wait. Your sword... Tenseiga is the sword that brings back life. Please, Sesshoumaru, use Tenseiga to bring his father back!" she asked, her voice husky and raw as she pleaded with him.
Eyes still closed, he tensed. I am letting her manipulate my emotions... of what use is bringing this youkai back?
He hardened his heart, and was frustrated to find that it was the hardest thing he'd ever had to do. She was conquering him just as much as he was her, and he was beginning to wonder just how far he was going to fall. What would be left of Sesshoumaru – of who he had always been - when this had culminated and he had taken her as his own forever?
No. I am the killing perfection, the ending of the circle of life – not the beginning. There is no point in returning this youkai to life.
"This has nothing to do with me." He once more began to move away, but came to a rather surprised halt when the kitsune who traveled with Kagome and his whelp of a brother confronted him. He was obviously scared, but seemed determined despite that and Sesshoumaru paused, curious to see what the boy would say.
"Ano... can you save him?"
"Shippo," Inuyasha said softly, his mind obviously going back to the day that the kit had lost his own father. His eyes saddened, and Kagome also said the kit's name in such an understanding and compassionate voice that Sesshoumaru froze inwardly for a moment in jealousy that she had never turned that compassion on him.
"If... if his otou-san dies, then Kanta will be all alone."
Opening his eyes and staring into the skies ahead so as not to see the boy's pleading face, Sesshoumaru clenched his fraying control with all his strength. "Move," he said coldly, refusing to look at the child or anyone else.
He was taken aback, however, when the kitsune dropped to his knees and began pleading and begging for his help.
"Please, please," he almost chanted, bowing repeatedly in a sign of great respect. "I beg you," he cried at last, tears beginning to run down his own face, which froze Sesshoumaru inside.
Before he could react, Kagome knelt down at Shippo's side, a sad, regretful look on her own face that he couldn't stand to see and lifted him from the ground and into her arms, her, "Shippo-chan," filled with such pained heartache that Sesshoumaru felt as though he'd been gutted.
No! It is not my problem to go around saving everyone... not even for her!
"Forget it, Shippo, its useless," Inuyasha said, his voice contemptuous as he glared at his brother's back. "It's too bad, but Sesshoumaru ain't the type to come to anyone's assistance." Inuyasha glanced at Kagome from the corner of his eyes, really hoping that she was watching this – he wanted her to get the message that Sesshoumaru cared about nothing but himself and his own wants. "And besides that," he growled sardonically, "Tenseiga isn't something that Sesshoumaru can use, anyway."
Sesshoumaru looked back at his brother from the corner of one narrowed eye, irritation flaring through him, but before he could even think to respond, someone else did.
"That's true," came the monk's voice, surprising him. "It takes a compassionate heart to use that sword." One he doesn't have, was the silent qualifier.
"Precisely," Sesshoumaru returned, taking the excuse the monk had just handed him, once more beginning to take a step. This time, however, it was Tenseiga itself that interrupted his forward motion, and he paused in surprise as the blade pulsed with a demand of its own - and irritation that he was not being allowed to leave as he wanted to do.
He stared down at it curiously. Tenseiga is stirring again... is it telling me to save that youkai? He scowled for a moment. Why?
Reacting strictly with the heart everyone, he included, insisted he didn't have before he could clamp down on it with his usual control, he felt Kagome come to a halt right behind him expectantly and he drew the sword and held it out to his side as it pulsed in satisfaction. He looked at the child still holding to his father's body. "Move."
When the child obeyed, he watched as Tenseiga's light began to grow, his eyes hooding as he waited for its light to show him what it would. I see... the messengers of the underworld. So they are what it wants me to cut. His eyes narrowed further and his youki stirred in agitation as well as understanding. Frustrated with being unable to deny Kagome's wishes or the pleading of the child - or Tenseiga's demand - he took his disturbed emotions out on the messengers with a powerful swing, shearing through the little imps in a swift strike before sheathing the blade - all in one smooth motion.
As they all waited breathlessly to see what would happen, it remained still and quiet for several seconds... a breeze stirred up and rustled the grasses around the young otter's father, but there was nothing else for several moments. And then, to everyone's surprise – except Kagome, who had complete faith in Sesshoumaru's power to return the youkai to life despite Inuyasha's words and even his own reluctance to act - Kanta's father's eyes opened and he moved.
Sesshoumaru simply watched as the otter pup ran to his father and began crying with joy and the boy's father held him with relief. He was no longer surprised to see the kitsune smiling and saying he was glad, though he noted the tears from the boy and had to wonder why he had been so emotionally distraught by this situation.
He must have lost his own father in some way similar, he thought, trying not to see Kagome's happy and grateful smile cast in his direction.
"... never thought I'd be able to get back," the now revived otter youkai was saying as he sat up and pulled the spears from his body, tossing them into the grass at his feet.
Miroku watched him with a curious and rather envious look upon his face. Would that it was so easy for us humans to heal from such wounds and act so casually about yanking spears from our flesh. "Ano... where were you?"
The youkai looked down and sighed, eyes far away. "Ah... a very strange place. A world shrouded in white mist. I was flying through this world with only my head, and I noticed other numerous youkai heads, all with terrible expressions on their faces."
"The other youkai that were beheaded by Hakudoshi," Inuyasha surmised.
The otter nodded, then continued describing his experience with death. "When I dove under the mist, there were giant bones."
"Giant... bones?" Kagome repeated slowly, a suspicion beginning to grow in her mind.
"Yes," the youkai nodded, "there was a giant skeleton clad in magnificent armor."
Kagome and Inuyasha both gasped.
Sesshoumaru, who had been listening silently simply because he didn't want to leave Kagome's presence and had kept his eyes closed as he tried to convince himself to do so, opened them as he heard that, his attention arrested. Chichi-ue...
"... and there were lots of other skeletons, too. I guess that's the world of the afterlife."
"Papa," little Kanta said, and his father looked down at him questioningly.
"Eh? Oh! Thank you for saving me!" he said to everyone, bowing, his son's expression reminding him of the debt he had to them.
"Sesshoumaru, arigatou-" Kagome started, but then broke off as she looked up and found him walking away aloofly.
"He left," Sango said as she watched him walk away with a weighing look upon her face. What was he thinking just now?
Ignoring those behind him completely now as his mind got lost in the puzzle of Tenseiga and his father's reasons for giving him that sword again, he couldn't help but to wonder. What was Tenseiga trying to tell me? Is it telling me to remember... that it involves that place? It is where the shard is, the shard I need so as to force Naraku to come to me.
Kagome watched Sesshoumaru walk away, his beautiful hair stirring in the breeze and his stride full of more unearthly grace and elegance than even the most polished human dancer or hime with sadness in her heart. She could feel his confusion and even his deeply buried thoughts of his father – and the pain those thoughts caused him. Whether he had realized it or not, in the end what had given him the power to actually do what he had just done in returning that youkai to life was the thought of his own father – and losing him. Though he's angry, hurt, and bitter at his otou because he doesn't understand why he did the things he did, he is hurt by it because... deep down... he loved his father - and once upon a time, he was that small child looking up at his father with wide, awed eyes. Somewhere inside, that child still existed, though he would never admit it and probably never acknowledge such a thing, either. Her heart hurt for him, and she once again wondered why the Inu no Taisho had done what he had done.
After seeing his spirit after defeating Sou'unga, however, she had no doubts that he had loved both his sons – whether Sesshoumaru knew it or not.
And that means that he gave that sword to Sesshoumaru for a specific reason... but what could it have been? Why give Tessaiga to Inuyasha and not Tenseiga, since it would have worked to subdue his youkai side, too – and maybe even better, since it would have overwhelmed the youkai blood inside Inuyasha even more effectively by waking his human heart back up?
Was it just to show Sesshoumaru his own heart? Yes... I'm sure that was part of it – but there has to be more. There has to be – I think that's only one part of the puzzle...
She shook her head, a slight frown on her face, then set the matter aside to think of later. Shippo's tears and smile as he stared up at Kanta's father after the otter thanked him, and his slip in calling him otou made her smile with sadness - and yet joy, too.
He's thinking of his father...
~oOo~
Back on the road once more now that Kanta and his father had gone home, it was quiet for a little bit as they all pondered on different aspects of what had happened.
Miroku was the first to break the silence.
"That place that Kanta's father saw – I wonder if Hakudoshi knows about it?"
"Yeah..." Inuyasha grunted, his own mind unquiet as thoughts of his father and Sesshoumaru and the missing shard boiled through it.
"But where is this place that's strewn with giant bones and covered in white mist?" Sango asked, a little frustrated at the lack of actual answers. "That's not very much information to go on..."
It was quiet for a moment as Kagome looked sideways at Inuyasha, wondering if he was going to say anything – wondering if Kanta's father's description had seemed just as familiar to him. As he'd gasped when hearing it, she was pretty sure it had.
"I... I may've been there once," Inuyasha said quietly, his head lowered and his voice as far away as his gaze.
Sango, Miroku, and Shippo all gasped, staring at him wide-eyed.
"What? Do you remember something about it?!" Miroku asked excitedly.
"Aa," he answered softly, his eyes closing, but he didn't say anything more, ignoring the frustrated surprise of the others when he didn't elaborate. Oyaji's grave...
Kagome watched him from the side with solemn eyes. Inuyasha is thinking the same thing I am... white mist and giant bones... the border between this world and the next – the grave of his father.
One last thought crossed her mind.
I wonder if Sesshoumaru also thinks the same – or if he even cares? He hasn't really been looking for the shards, anyway...
~oOo~
The usual stump of Ah-Uhn's heavy tread did not even penetrate into Sesshoumaru's thoughts as he ordered Jaken to quit asking him questions, the scent of his prey coming to him teasingly on the wind as he came to a sudden halt.
That boy... and behind him, the smell of Naraku. Just like Kagura. Perhaps I can simply catch him now and kill him, and then I will not have to bother with traveling to the verge of the underworld just to gather a useless shard of an even more useless jewel.
That option appealed to him. Sesshoumaru wasn't averse to hard work or he would never have become the warrior he was. But he also saw no need to complicate things just to do so. If he could gain his ends the easy way, then even better – if it was easy then it was usually quicker, as well.
And besides – all this playing around and beating around the bush was beginning to anger him greatly. He was, first and foremost, a warrior and he preferred simply getting to the battle to settle who would triumph and who would not. But Naraku was a true spider – he hid in the dark and set webs to catch his prey, only showing himself when he knew that he was safe from retaliation.
He was the type of being he, Sesshoumaru, most despised. A coward – a weak coward.
"Yes... this time for sure I will kill him."
He strode forward again, ignoring the confused sounds from behind him – though he did find Rin's caution to Jaken, "Jaken-sama, you had better not ask him unnecessary questions or he said he'll kill you," most amusing as his usually noisy retainer gulped and then fell silent. And then that thought went out of his mind as he focused on his enemy once more.
The scent remained for some little while and he followed it to a river running through a small glade in the forest they'd been in as he'd searched for a good spot to leave his retainer and Rin. Suddenly, just as he reached the water, however, all trace of his enemy faded away.
It's gone... he scowled... Did I let him slip away? Suddenly irritated when Jaken once again started to question him, he looked at him warningly from the corner of his eye and the toad fell all over himself to backtrack. Turning back to his perusal of the river he walked away, not acknowledging Rin's comment to Jaken, nor Jaken's snapped, "Silence!" in return... or even the toad's shrieking when he realized that his Lord had continued on without him.
He was aware of the fact that his half-brother and the others were also relatively near, as was usual – since they were, after all, all after Naraku. It was extremely agitating that the damn spider had managed to hide from them all the way he had, but Sesshoumaru had great patience when he needed to. He was implacable in his will and sooner or later Naraku would fall to him, that was not even a question in his mind.
Unfortunately, this time his patience was a bit strained because of Kagome – and her effect on his emotions. Pausing in his tread and his thoughts for a moment, he lifted his head and closed his eyes as the breeze darted past him, testing for any renewal of Naraku's scent, but then continued on when no sign of the hanyou tainted the wind.
If I cannot catch a trace of him I will have to continue on with my previous plans, he thought with an inward growl of irritation. He must have caught the fact that I had found his scent and hidden himself away once more. Coward.
He smiled, then, a little grimly as a particular thought slid through his mind. While the spider's constant hiding was annoying, at least he had the sense to know he could not face he, Sesshoumaru, in combat and win. In a way, the fact that he hid himself so carefully was a bow to the Western Lord's prowess and strength – Naraku, even with the jewel shards he had already, knew he could not compare.
One wonders what he thinks will happen once he has wished himself a full youkai with the jewel – does he really believe that even as a full blood, he, a mere insect, could ever hope to match this one? Perhaps I should just allow him to gain all the shards – even help him. Once he has the completed jewel and has wished away his weak human remnants, I will then simply kill him. It would be far too easy to do – especially since he wouldn't have those damn shards to continually renew his energy and flesh.
Now that the thought had occurred to him, he couldn't help but ponder on it. It would definitely be an easier approach to the matter... and probably a much quicker one, as well.
But after a while spent thinking on it, he reluctantly decided that the risks outweighed the possible rewards – once he had the jewel in his hands, Naraku might decide to wish for something different. The possibilities were endless and all so very bad. And he'd also begun to suspect that the jewel was truly the one that was really behind this whole situation. Kagome had let slip something one day that had given him that stunning suspicion, and he now thought it highly probable that Naraku was merely a puppet - though he was just as positive that the spider had no idea. It was the jewel that needed someone to complete it and then wish on it.
He wondered just what it was that a sentient jewel could desire.
That list was also very long, however, and just as bad as what Naraku's desires could be, and so he firmed his determination to find that last shard so as to draw the spider to him and continued on in his implacable pace, firmly ignoring everything that didn't have something to do with the search for his enemy.
~oOo~
"Those damn birds!" Kagome gritted out as she flamed yet another arrow and then let fly, destroying a swath of cawing fire birds as they headed for her. Around her people screamed and ran aimlessly in a panic as the birds attacked, killing as many as possible and sucking down their blood.
A high-pitched scream tore her attention away from the sky and she whipped around. Just a few dozen feet away from her a young mother was crouching over her crying twins, eyes wide and frightened as she stared up at the two birds hovering over them. Without thought, Kagome grabbed an arrow; nocking it to her bow she let fly in one smooth motion, destroying the birds before they could kill the helpless threesome.
She could hear the shock of the Windscar on the other side of the village and even Sango and Miroku's shouting, but it appeared that they were all over on the other side with Inuyasha and she was the only one over on this side. Trotting over to the still shaking woman, she knelt at her side and drew another arrow, setting herself protectively before them as she glared up into the sky at their nemesis.
Princess Abi stared with anger at the girl crouched on the ground beneath her, wanting nothing so much as to destroy her. But she knew better; she'd caught the scent emanating from the girl – both scents.
Whatever that girl looked like she wasn't truly human, and while that in and of itself would not have stopped her from attacking, the other scent coming from her certainly did. She knew better... whoever it was that had placed that claim mark was very powerful – far more than she herself. It would not go well for her were she to ignore said mark.
She glanced down at the trident in her hand, then back at the girl inimically. Even with this weapon I don't dare attack her...
With one last glare at the girl who was daring to hold an arrow on her, she called her birds back – they had taken enough blood for now. "If it weren't for that mark, you little bitch, I would have killed you in a heart beat!"
Kagome narrowed her eyes even more on the youkai female as her birds began to encircle her. "I'm not one bit afraid of you," she yelled up at the female, suddenly furious, "so don't let that mark bother you!" She flamed her arrow brightly. "You want to see how long it takes me to make you disappear?" she finished pugnaciously. She was suddenly so very tired of always being taken for a weakling – just because she hadn't trained as a miko and didn't know how to necessarily make her power do what she wanted it to do all the time didn't mean she was helpless.
Normally Kagome wasn't the type to speak to anyone the way she was at the moment, but she had just had a bellyful of Inuyasha underestimating her constantly lately and some of his comments earlier about her weak human body and lack of control over her power had just finally pissed her off. Especially when he then compared her to Kikyou. And now this rude, evil female was basically doing the same thing, thinking that she could just defeat her so easily if it weren't for Sesshoumaru's mark.
For a moment it almost looked as though the female was going to take her up on it – but then she snarled in fury and turned, leading her birds off into the darkness. Kagome gritted her teeth in temper and watched until she could no longer see them, and then let her power fall back into her body and sighed. She turned to look over her shoulder at the woman who was still crying from the terror of the night, though the tears were slowing as she met Kagome's gaze.
"Thank you for saving us," she whispered, clutching to her children. "I wish I had your power," she added softly, "so then I wouldn't have to be afraid, either."
Kagome snorted at that as she stood and helped the woman do so as well. "It wouldn't matter if I didn't have power – I still wouldn't let some jerk like that walk all over me," she said crisply. Her mind went back to her first meeting with Sesshoumaru in his father's grave. Despite the fact that she'd been unable to really call any of her power that day, she still hadn't been about to back down from him.
She wouldn't from some stupid bird woman, either.
Ignoring the awed look from the young mother, she looked out over the village and sighed – it was complete chaos; most of the place had been burned to the ground and there were many dead, just like the several they'd come across before this one that Princess Abi and her birds had decimated.
Before she could so much as take a step, though, Inuyasha came running, Tessaiga still drawn and yelling the entire way. "Kagome! Kagome!" he screamed, and the girl in question sighed again and rolled her eyes, bracing herself as he caught sight of her and dashed towards her. "What the hell were ya doin' runnin' off, wench?! You're lucky that bitch didn't see you, or she'da had you for dinner!"
Clenching her bow tightly in hands that wanted to reach out and wring the hanyou's neck, Kagome opened her mouth to start yelling, but was silenced by the quiet voice of the young woman.
"You shouldn't yell at her. That bird woman did see her and wanted to fight with her, but miko-sama was not afraid and told her so, even daring her to try to harm her. The whole time miko-sama held her arrow on that evil woman and she refused to get close. I think that she can defend herself and you shouldn't underestimate her – she saved me and my children without any help, after all." With that, the young woman took her children in hand with a silent dignity that surprised Kagome and walked away, leading her little family back towards what was left of their home village and leaving a dumbstruck Inuyasha behind with his mouth hanging open.
It was totally inappropriate to the moment, but at the look on Inuyasha's face Kagome wanted to laugh. It felt nice for someone to defend her fighting capabilities to the very arrogant hanyou she traveled with. "Not bad for a weak human, eh? I didn't need your help at all, Inuyasha. Maybe the next time you want to be an ass about things you should think about that."
Inuyasha didn't say a word as she turned on her heel and walked off, looking for Sango and Miroku so that they could find a place to camp for the night. It was clear there wouldn't be any rest to be had in this village – there wasn't one building left intact, so what was left of the villagers would also be camping out.
Sesshoumaru, too – I bet he would think the only reason I was okay was because of this damn mark. She scowled, disgruntled. Well, I'm not helpless and one of these days I'll prove it to both those arrogant brothers.
I can take care of myself.
She couldn't deny that it was definitely nice that all the strength and power that Sesshoumaru had was so focused on defending and protecting her in case she ever did need it. But that didn't mean that she was helpless and unable to defend herself.
Not at all.
All of them – Inuyasha, Sesshoumaru, even Naraku – they all think I'm weak. Won't they be surprised when they finally find out that I'm not?
That day was coming... she could feel it, and she smiled. She might be fated to be with Sesshoumaru, as she was coming to accept more and more – though she still wasn't necessarily comfortable with it – but she'd be damned if she'd let him treat her like some inferior little female that had to be protected all the time.
It was quiet as the group gathered and then took themselves off down the road, not wanting to hassle what was left of the villagers as they began to regroup. Kagome was still preoccupied by what had happened and her sudden desire to cast off the role that she'd let Inuyasha place her in from day one, and so paid no attention to her friend's heavy thoughts.
Yes, when she'd arrived here in this era she had needed some protection and guidance. After all, it was nothing like her world – and it would be the same for any of the people here were they to suddenly find themselves in her world. Even Sesshoumaru, Mr. 'I'm the Almighty Killing Perfection' wouldn't know what to do were he to suddenly be flung from this world into hers. But she wasn't stupid, wasn't a fool, wasn't slow, and definitely wasn't physically incapable, and she'd pretty much figured out how to survive here by now. If the well were to close and strand her here, she'd be okay. In fact, in most ways this world was much easier to live in than hers.
She frowned after a moment; what was it that had finally pushed her over the edge and into this determination to prove that she was just as capable as any of the rest of them?
With an inward sigh and a downturn of her lips, she acknowledged what that determination was really about; she could feel, inside, some of Sesshoumaru's own plaguing feelings, and she had already admitted to herself - quietly and only in her deepest thoughts, of course - that she was in love with him. The bottom line was, as much as she hated to admit it, she was trying to prove herself as worthy – but not so much to him as she was trying to prove to herself that she could be worthy of him.
In her eyes, in a complete turnaround from when she'd first met him, he was perfect. Beautiful enough to hurt her eyes, graceful, intelligent and protective of those he cared for though he hated for anyone to know that, he had an endless heart that was hidden and hurt and crying out with that hurt. She wanted so badly to heal him... but because of his perfection of form and power, she didn't feel that she measured up to him. In her eyes, no one was as perfect as Sesshoumaru. But maybe she could be almost worthy in his eyes if she could prove that she could stand on her own two feet?
I don't want him to think I'm weak and helpless, like Inuyasha does. And even Sango and Miroku, sometimes – they see me as always needing someone with me so I don't get hurt. While I'm glad they care about me and don't want anything bad to happen to me, they all seem to forget who it was out of all of us who came the closest to killing Naraku – me. It wasn't Inuyasha, wasn't Miss I'm all that and a bag of chips Kikyou, wasn't Sesshoumaru, and it wasn't Sango or Miroku.
It was me. Because he hurt my friends.
In the end, Kagome wasn't searching for Naraku for vengeance on her own behalf. He hadn't really done anything to her specifically that she needed revenge for. She was helping her friends hunt him for their sakes – and for the sakes of all the people that he'd already hurt or murdered, and hopefully, to stop him from hurting or murdering any others. Her only true involvement in the matter on her own behalf came because of the jewel – she needed to see it put back together and then destroyed, because it was her responsibility.
A breeze rustled through the grass around them and the trees ahead, and Kagome looked up; in it she could smell Sesshoumaru, and she wondered how that could be, because Inuyasha obviously couldn't or he'd have already been screaming and cursing.
But despite the fact that no one else seemed to notice, she could clearly scent him, and her eyes fell closed in poignant desire; she wanted to see him, to touch him so badly...
And the strangest thing of all was that she could feel his feelings in return; he could also scent her, and he wanted to hold her and touch her just as much. But the sharp, desperate pain that welled from within his soul at thought of her was so shocking to Kagome that her eyes shot open wide and she gasped aloud, startling her companions into looking at her as they waded through the thigh-high grasses headed for the trees.
Tears actually welled in her eyes and all she wanted to do was hold him and heal him and keep his heart safe forever.
She had finally admitted to the truth of her feelings – she loved him and she always would and she no longer even wanted to change it.
If only... if only he could return that love and heal her own now sore heart, too...
But reciprocity wasn't something she expected and so her face fell and she shook her head in despair. Even... even if he doesn't love me, I can't help my feelings for him. And so I will finish my quest, finish wishing the jewel away and helping my friends destroy Naraku – and then I will go to him and love him and heal him as best as I'm able and as much as he'll allow.
Maybe someday he'd love her, too – at least a little.
~oOo~
A/N: Things are going to start getting different soon, just a warning. Also, I'm sorry for posting rather late on this, but I've been fighting a virus for some weeks now, and I've been mostly asleep in fever dreams this last almost two weeks. I'm feeling a little better now, and hoping to keep that way and not sink back into that nightmare dreamworld of mine while sleeping my life away.
Keep your fingers crossed that I can!
Amber
