"Lying is done with words, and also with silence."

~ Adrienne Rich

"You know that's strangely erotic." Brian said as he watched Adeline milk the cow.

"Too bad Betsy doesn't think so," she replied smiling up at him from her perched seat on the overturned milk bucket.

Her smile faded when she saw the dark circles under his eyes.

"Bad night?" She asked with genuine concern.

Brian pushed his tongue into the side of his cheek and contemplated the woman sitting before him.

She was a paradox to be sure. She was by nature a loving, caring person. Brian sensed no malice in her. She truly believed Justin was her long lost husband, and her deep affection for him was genuine.

However she had to know on some level that Justin wasn't Jacques, and that he had a family of his own. Yet she was selfish in her desires and refused to let that knowledge deter her from her goal. Perhaps she just couldn't take another loss. Brian sympathized with her, but his first concern was Justin. He had his own family, and they needed him more than she needed her delusion fed.

"I've had better," he answered crouching down beside her.

Adeline felt uncomfortable at his nearness and shifted a bit on the bucket.

"Um, do you always rise this early?" She asked.

"Usually." Brian answered. He knew she was attempting polite conversation, but Brian wasn't in the mood for idle chatter, he was on a mission.

"Tell me Adeline, do Jacques parents know Jacque is alive?" Brian asked.

Adeline's hands stilled on the cows utter.

James had brought some information, along with the cigarettes and booze, with him last night about Adeline and Jacques. Adeline had no living relatives; Jacques however had a mother and father who were still alive and residing just outside Paris. They hadn't seen their daughter-in-law since the day she gave birth to their stillborn grandson. According to Gilles, who delivered the baby, they stayed long enough to bury the baby then left Adeline alone, along with enough money to wash away their guilt, and never contacted her again.

It was a cruel heartless thing to do, and he could understand why Adeline didn't want any part of them. Still, if she truly believed Justin was Jacques, he believed she would have contacted them. It just wasn't in her nature to be intentionally cruel.

"Adeline?" Brian prompted for an answer.

She turned tearful eyes to him. "No, and I don't want them to know. They'll steal him away from me, just like they stole my baby. Please don't tell them!" She pleaded in a shaky, fearful voice.

Brian's heart filled with pity, which of course, made his dick soft.

"Fuck," he cursed then put a soothing hand on her shoulder and squeezed reassuringly.

"Don't worry, I won't tell them. I promise. But I need you to help me with something." Brian said.

Adeline swiped the tears from her eyes with the back of her hand.

"What?" She asked.

"Jus…Jacques needs to go to the hospital Adeline. He needs to have that leg x-rayed and he needs a cat scan. What if there's bleeding in his brain? Do you want to risk that?" He asked hoping her affection and concern for 'Jacques' would overrule her own emotional needs.

Adeline's eyes widen at that possibility. She obviously never considered it.

"He would be sick if that were true, wouldn't he? I mean wouldn't he be dizzy, have headaches, some symptoms?" she asked anxiously.

Brian sighed. "I don't know, but I don't think you should risk not having him checked out. You could lose him again. Permanently this time." Brian reasoned.

Adeline's chest rose and fell rapidly in her agitation.

"They'll take him away from me. I know they will!" She said through the tears that were now falling freely down her face.

Brian stood up and pulled Adeline up with him. He embraced her and patted her back soothingly, as if calming a distraught child.

"Shhhh... I would never let that happen. I think you know that." Brian said.

Adeline hiccupped against Brian's shoulder and wept some more. It felt so good to be held and consoled. She never had that luxury. Not since Jacques disappeared.

"I promise you, no one is going to lock your husband away. Can you imagine anyone even trying? He'd have their balls. Trust me, no one can force him to do something he doesn't want to. He's as stubborn as a mule." Brian teased.

Adeline laughed through her tears.

"He is that. You know he never use to be," she said in a conspiratorial voice.

"Really? Do tell." Brian countered with one raised eyebrow. He sensed an opportunity to gain her trust. Something he needed to obtain his goal.

"Don't get me wrong, when he put his mind to something, nothing could stop him. Like when he turned his back on his family and his inheritance to marry me. I couldn't believe he did that for me. For me…" she repeated as if still amazed her that he sacrificed so much for her.

"But he never did anything impulsively. He made sure we had this cabin and the means to survive before he made his decision to forego his inheritance. He was always so level headed. He thought before he acted and he never got flustered, or angry. Now, well now he's just so unpredictable! He's changed," she whispered sadly.

Brian held her at arms length and studied her.

"Yes he has. It's good that you see that," he said.

"So you will help me convince our unpredictable friend to go to the hospital for some tests?" Brian asked giving Adeline one of his winning smiles.

Adeline nodded her head.

"I think you are right, it's best," she admitted reluctantly.

Brian tilted his head and pushed just a little further.

"I have another request," he said.

Adeline looked up at him and waited.

"I want you to get checked out as well," he said.

Adeline pulled away from him angrily.

"There is NOTHING wrong with me!" She shouted.

"How do you know? Have you seen a doctor in the past five years?" He asked.

"No, I've no reason. I'm FINE!" She turned her back on him.

Brian reached out for her and spun her around to face him.

"Listen to me Adeline, are you listening?" He asked.

Adeline stiffened her body and narrowed her eyes but she relented.

"Yes, I'm listening," she said.

"You should do this for Jacques. Don't you think he deserves a healthy wife? I'm not talking about seeing a shrink. I'm talking about simple blood work, and female stuff. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about. A woman needs certain care and you've not been taking care of yourself. I think if you told Jacques you hadn't been to a doctor in five years, he'd insist you go get checked. He cares about you." Brian tried to reason with her.

If he could get her in for a complete physical, it would open the door to future medical evaluations and care. The woman really did need help.

Adeline heard his words and had to admit he had a point. She hadn't taken as good of care of herself as she could have. What if Jacques wanted another baby? She had to make sure she was fit enough to carry another child. Still, she didn't want anyone touching her. She hated the idea of having a stranger examine her. Deep down, she feared what they would find.

"I'll think about it," she finally said.

Brian accepted her answer. He pushed enough for one day. He felt he made progress.

"Well then, tell me how I can help you?" He said releasing her and eyeing the cow with a repugnant look on his face.

Adeline laughed at his expression.

"It looks like you haven't done much farm work in awhile," she said.

"Try never." Brian corrected.

"Tell you what, why don't you go inside and make coffee and eggs for our breakfast. I'll handle the outside work," she suggested.

Brian heaved a deep dramatic sigh of relief that was worthy of an Oscar.

"Now that I think I can handle," he said.

Adeline smiled at him.

He bent down and gave her a friendly peck on the cheek before sauntering off.

She blushed at his boldness then went back to her morning chores.

PART 2

Justin woke to the smell of fresh coffee brewing. He looked over at the clock on his nightstand and frowned. It was still early. Adeline never came back from her morning chores before seven a.m.

He swung his legs over the bed, grabbed his crutches, and went into the bathroom to wash up. God he felt awful.

If he slept an hour, he was lucky. The incident with Brian last night still hung heavy in his mind, and apparently, other parts of his body.

Justin reached down and squeezed his jutting member almost painfully. Morning hard-ons were never this aching, or this demanding-that he could remember. He needed relief, and quick.

He stood in front of the mirror and furiously stroked his throbbing cock. His head fell back and a soft moan escaped his lips as visions of the hot Adonis filled his brain.

He could almost feel the velvety roughness of Brian's tongue glide over his pulsing member with each stroke. His breath quicken as his climax neared, and visions of hot sweaty bodies joined together exploded in his brain as his seed spilled forth.

Justin collapsed against the sink, shaking and spent. His orgasm was excruciatingly intense and just from thinking about sex with Brian! He couldn't even image what the reality of fucking him would be like. Surely it would kill him.

Once his breathing calmed, he opened his eyes to find a flushed, well-satisfied face staring back at him in the mirror. Instant shame consumed him. He ran the cold water and splashed his face with it.

"Damn it!" He cursed gripping the edge of the sink.

"I've got to get control back," he hissed through gritted teeth at his reflection in the mirror.

He pulled himself together, brushed his teeth, and gave his body a thorough scrubbing.

He had to get the smell of Brian off him. Unfortunately his efforts were futile; it became painfully obvious that all the soap in the world couldn't erase his scent. It was now forever etched into his brain.

Sometime later he emerged to find the source of his shame standing in the kitchen whisking up some eggs in a bowl.

Brian looked up the moment he felt Justin enter the room. He sent him a brilliant smile that belied the tense coiled feeling of panic that seized his stomach. They hadn't parted on particularly good terms last night.

"Good morning Sunshine," he said a little too cheerily.

'Does he have to look so fucking good in the morning?' Justin's brain rebelled.

"Good morning. And don't call me Sunshine," he responded in a voice that he hoped sounded indifferent.

"Hmmm.. Apparently not so good." Brian remarked.

Justin's eyes scanned the room, searching. His heart raced.

"Where's Andy?" He asked, the anxiety thick in his voice.

Brian's lips tightened. He put the bowl of eggs down and stalked towards him.

He grabbed Justin by his arm and turned him towards the guest bedroom and guided him to it.

Justin hobbled over as quickly as his crutches would take him.

Once they got to the bedroom door, Brian swung it open to reveal a sleeping Andy.

"Happy now?" He bit out caustically.

Justin let out a big sigh of relief.

Brian shut the door and turned to Justin.

"You're so fucking worried he's going to leave you, yet you could give a shit if I'm here or not!" Brian spat out hurt and angry.

"Maybe that's because I know you won't leave me." Justin shot back without thinking.

Brian's eyebrow rose at that declaration.

"Oh? And how do you know that?" He asked cautiously.

"Don't ask me questions I can't answer. I just know." Justin said then made his way back to the kitchen. He could kick himself for letting that out.

Brian followed him feeling a little better. It was another small, good sign.

He picked up his bowl of eggs and started whisking again.

"Fair enough. So tell me why are you so afraid Andy is going to leave?" Brian pressed. Maybe Justin had answers, even if he didn't know what they meant.

Justin shrugged. "Again, it's just a feeling, but…" he trailed off.

"But what?" Brian asked.

"It's going to sound stupid." Justin said.

"You're blond. It's expected," Brian teased sarcastically.

"Ha, ha. Very funny. And you're so smart?" He returned.

"Obviously not. I'm still here," he said with a sly smile.

Justin blushed.

"Come on, tell me. It might help trigger something in your memory." Brian said.

"Ok, but don't blame me if this sounds crazy, but I have this feeling of unfinished business with Andy. Something bad happened, or will happen if he leaves again." Justin confessed.

Brian put the bowl down and looked at Justin intently. His blond was on to something. Bad things have happened to both of them, and continued to happen to Justin after Andy died. But what unfinished business could they have? And what did he mean by 'leave again'? They never met, not in this lifetime anyway.

Could Justin and Andy have a past life connection? With current events as they were, it was a very reasonable assumption.

…Seek the lineage…

The strange voice in his head was back.

"Ok, I get it. Can you play a different tune now?" Brian said out loud to the voice in his head.

"Huh? What are you talking about?" Justin asked.

It was Brian's turn to blush. "Sorry, that wasn't meant for you," he said.

Justin shook his head, "and I'm supposed to be the crazy one!"

Brian laughed.

"Yeah well crazy is a relative term. As for Andy, I don't think he'll be going anywhere soon. Not at least until we can figure all this out." Brian tried to reassure Justin.

"In he meantime I'd like to talk to you about Adeline," he said.

Justin furrowed his brow. "What about Adeline?"

"Did you know she hasn't been to a doctor in five years? You know that can't be good. Gilles said she's had a rough time of it since you disappeared, she should get a physical, you know, to make sure she's ok. Stress can cause all sorts of problems. High blood pressure, depression, changes in blood sugar levels…"

"What the fuck? Oh that's going to change right now! I'm going to call Gilles and set up an appointment for her." Justin said.

Brian smiled to himself. He knew Justin would react this way.

"She won't go. I tried to convince her she should, but she pretty much blew me off." Brian said.

"Yeah well I'm her husband, she'll listen to me." Justin said confidently.

Brian cringed at Justin's comfortable use of the word 'husband'. But he couldn't let his emotions over rule his logic. He had to deal with his current situation objectively.

'Good luck with that Kinney.' His mind mocked.

'Shut the fuck up. I can handle this.'

Great, now he was talking to himself. He might as well set up an appointment to get checked himself. Better yet, just have himself thrown in the Looney bin. It had to be a saner place then where he was now.

He shook his wayward thoughts away and concentrated on the task on hand.

"She's afraid of doctors and hospitals. It's why she doesn't want you to go. You know, I bet if you agreed to go get check out, she might do the same." Brian said nonchalantly as he poured the whipped eggs into the hot frying pan.

Justin's anger cooled a bit and he sat at the kitchen table and eyed Brian suspiciously.

"You just set me up, didn't you?" He asked, not able to hide the admiration in his voice.

Brian shrugged. "So what if I did? Does it change the fact that both of you need medical attention?" He countered.

Justin couldn't argue with that.

"No, it doesn't. I'll make the appointments," he conceded.

"Good. Now that, that's settled, let's eat." Brian said.

He scooped the scrambled eggs out of the frying pan onto two dishes. He brought them to the table, then went back and got two cups of coffee for them.

They sat and ate their breakfast in comfortable silence.

Another, small good sign Brian thought.

Justin broke the silence with a question. One Brian never saw coming.

"Am I the top, or the bottom?"

Brian nearly choked on his coffee.

"Well we could throw Andy out of the guest bedroom and find out if you like." Brian suggested seductively.

Justin made a haughty face.

"Don't be absurd. Adeline will be back any minute," he said then put his fork down.

Brian noticed he didn't dismiss the idea entirely. He just excused why they couldn't do that at the moment. Oh yeah, lots of good signs this morning he thought.

"Jesus, am I bisexual?" Justin suddenly asked.

"Only you can answer that. Do you feel like fucking Adeline?" Brian asked a little too caustically.

"Do you have to be so crude? Show some respect, this is my wife you're talking about. If you can't respect that, at least respect the fact that she saved my life!" Justin spat out angrily.

"I do respect the fact she saved your life. I was just never good at beating around the bush. I like the direct approach. The FACT is, you want to fuck me and I want to fuck you. My question is do you want to fuck Adeline too?" He asked.

Justin's face flamed at Brian's words, though he couldn't deny them. He did want to fuck him. Didn't mean he was going to. He was however, not about to let Mr. Kinney intimidate him.

"Well I must have fucked her at one point," he reasoned.

"Maybe not." Brian said.

"You forget, she was pregnant when I disappeared." Justin said, his mood growing somber.

"Whose to say it was yours?" Brian said.

He knew he was being cruel, but he couldn't lie to Justin. And keeping silent was just as bad as lying. At some point, Justin was going to know the truth. Brian wasn't going to continue to feed into the lie he was currently living.

Justin's jaw dropped open at Brian's words.

"You really are an insufferable asshole aren't you?" He accused.

"Perhaps, but like I pointed out last night, at least I'm honest. It's a fair enough question. All you know is what Adeline told you. You have no other frame of reference to your life before waking up on that river bank." Brian said.

"And all you know is who I was for the past five years!" Justin returned.

"I've known you since you were seventeen." Brian threw that fact out and waited for Justin reaction.

Justin's eyes grew wide with shock.

"How?" Justin whispered, his face growing pale.

"Fuck." Brian cursed under his breath. He just couldn't help himself. He had to rush things. By the look on Justin's face, that little bit of information threw him, big time.

"It's best if you remember on your own. The doctor said so. Just give it time. It will come." Brian said trying to diffuse Justin from pressing on. It was too much, too soon.

He should have known better.

"NO! Tell me now!" Justin demanded.

Brian narrowed his eyes trying to decide if Justin was ready to hear the truth.

Justin saw the indecision in Brian's eyes. He pounded his fist on the table in frustration.

"God damn it Brian! I'm not fucking stupid! I know we have history, why don't you just fucking tell me! What are you afraid of?" Justin demanded.

"I'm scared shitless you won't be able to handle the truth!" Brian yelled back at him.

Justin leaned over the table and dared Brian with his eyes.

"Try me." He challenged.

"Fine. You were just seventeen when I took your virginity. We've been lovers ever since." Brian blurted out.

Justin sat back, his face white with shock.

"Does Adeline know?" He asked.

Brian let out a bitter laugh.

"You have no idea how little Adeline knows. Come on Justin, you must sense she's not a well woman," he said.

Justin narrowed his eyes.

"She was well enough save my life." Justin defended.

"Yes, she did. And believe me, we are all grateful to her for that. But we're also very concerned about her state of mind." Brian informed him.

"What do you mean?" Justin asked.

A knot formed in the pit of his stomach. He instinctively knew his whole life was once again about to spin out of control.

Brian held his breath. He had to tread carefully here.

"I mean her memory is not dependable. She's been grieving for five years over her dead husband." Brian stated.

"But I'm not dead." Justin replied.

Brian held Justin's gaze for a long moment, weighing his next words very carefully.

"You're also not her husband," he said.