Chapter eleven

There he sat on the cement in front of a skate ramp. He hung his head low as he pushed a skateboard back and forth in front of him with his hand. From the very moment that he had opened his eyes that morning Bam was miserable. He was surprised that he dragged himself out of bed let alone to the skate park. He didn't feel like skating very much once he got there because every time he would start skating Sara would pop into his thoughts and he would get sick to his stomach. Angela skated up to him and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Why so glum?"

Bam sighed and looked at her. He shook his head "I dunno. I just have a lot on my mind right now."

"So I take it you wouldn't be up for a lesson then?"

She pushed her skateboard away from her with her foot and sat next to Bam. He looked down again and stared at his skateboard. She reached into her pocket and pulled out a coin and then held the coin out toward Bam.

"Quarter for your thoughts?"

He grinned a little "Isn't it supposed to be a penny?"

"Yeah but all I have is a quarter." She grinned and Bam managed to let out a small laugh. She lightly pushed on his shoulder "There you go. That's what I like to see. You do look better when you laugh. Now care to tell me what's bothering you?"

Bam sighed "It's just that… I really like Sara, and I think she likes me. And last night we went out to dinner together."

"Well that should be a good thing right?"

He looked at her "On the middle of dinner I had the pleasure of meeting Sean." He rolled his eyes and looked away

"Uh oh… so something happened with Sean didn't it?"

"Yeah… no… sort of. It was more with Sara than it was Sean. The thing is Sean goes up to her and starts kissing on her and stuff, and it's really pissing me off. Then Sara tells me not to get jealous of him. But it's like… dude he interrupted out date and you're acting like you're with him and that I don't even matter. How the hell am I supposed to not be jealous over that? Normally I'm not a real jealous person, but this time was different."

"So what did you do?"

"I did… nothing. I wanted to kick Sean's ass but I did nothing. Actually I told him off but Sara made me feel stupid for doing that. I feel like I should have done something though…"

"Aw Aaron. From what I know about you, you're a real nice guy and for Sara's sake right now it's probably best that you didn't do anything."

"Yeah I guess…" he looked at her "So this Sean guy… is he… I mean would you know if he's the father of her baby?"

"Sean? Oh man I don't know. Sara never really said who the father was."

"Ok well I guess what I really want to know is… has he ever slept with her?"

"They used to go out so I'd only assume that they slept together. But don't go by my word. You might want to ask Maxine about that one if you don't want to come out and ask Sara."

Bam nodded "Ok."

"So is that the only thing on your mind?"

"No actually, but that's all that I want to share."

"That's ok. So… You feel good enough to skate?"

"Yeah I guess I could do that." He stood up and grinned "Thanks."

"For what?"

"For caring enough to talk to me."

She grinned as she stood up "No problem." She patted him on the back and grabbed her board "Let's go skate."

As Angela gave Bam his "skate lesson" it took all Bam had in order to be able to concentrate. He knew that he was doing worse than usual, even worse for "Aaron's" standards. Angels commented about it to him but Bam didn't pay attention to it. He couldn't tell her everything that was on his mind right then.

He was suddenly filled with a world of regrets, causing his to end his "lesson" earlier than planned. He regretted faking his own death months ago. He regretted having to lie to the new people he had met and became friends with. He regretted having to constantly hide who he really was from the general public. He regretted no being able to see his old group of friends. Most of all he regretted having to lie to Sara.

After leaving the skate park Bam found himself wandering around town for a while. He didn't know where he was headed and he didn't care. He was just walking around in hopes that it would help him to clear his head. Every single thought seemed to revolve around Sara. If he continued to lie to her then that would also mean that once it was born he would also have to lie to his own baby. It was hard enough having to lie to Sara all the time. It would be even harder for him to lie to his child. His thoughts and guilt were beginning to drive him crazy. He started to walk back toward the apartment, growing weary from the walk and his own thoughts; he was hit with a revelation. He knew what he had to do. He had to tell Sara the truth.