I want to start by once again thanking you for all your lovely reviews for the last chapter. I am blown away by your completely unexpected response. If a reviewer has an account I like to thank them via PM but since I can't do that with Guest reviewers I'd like to take that opportunity now. Thank you all. In particular I'd like to thank Guest reviewers Penelope and Milque for writing some of the longest and most flattering reviews that I have ever seen and scarcely deserve. If you'd like to leave a review for this chapter and let me know that my hard work wasn't in vain I'd really appreciate it but if you'd like a general chit chat about nonsense and twaddle you can find me on Twitter at DHPLover.

To answer a couple of questions, Chapter Ten in particular had all of the dialogue written in my head the evening after I saw episode 4x18 in December. It's just taken a long time to reach this far. All of Taylor's parts were written long before White Lies Part One (likewise this chapter was written long before White Lies Part Three). I've been asked about the ages of the characters as well. If memory serves the only age that has been pinned to a character is Rusty. As for everyone else I have opted to use the ages of the actors. This probably puts the characters five years above what they might actually be but it's been easier for me to keep track that way.

Apologies for the length of time this update has taken but as you will see this chapter is long. Very very very very long but I hope worth the effort to read. I've written this chapter purely as a way to amuse myself and I like it more than anything else I've ever produced. I love the beginning, I love the conversation in the yard, I love every word between Andy and Provenza and I adore the end. I hope you feel the same. Some of the stories are from The Closer, some are made up and all facts came from a QI book.

Once again I don't own any of these characters etc etc.

This chapter picks up the following morning after chapter ten.

You'll need a good couple of hours and a whole lot of tea to get through it but I think the ending it worth it. Enjoy.

At the End of the Day - Chapter Eleven

The sunlight shining through the partially opened curtains was blinding, causing Sharon to stir as it illuminated her face. She didn't remember drawing the curtains before she climbed into bed the night before. She didn't remember getting into bed at all if she was perfectly honest. Sharon rolled over and away from the harsh sunlight, emitting a noise like a duck with its beak taped shut as she moved. Aside from the brightness and searing pain in her head the only other thing she was aware of was the sound of laughter very nearby. Finally she opened her eyes and blinked rapidly. Each blink seemed to scratch her eyes, making a noise like a door slamming shut on a submarine. As the light stung her barely open emerald orbs it made her head pound even more. She could see nothing but brightness. A blurred, bright, white nothingness. She knew her glasses were around somewhere but they probably wouldn't help in bringing the world into focus at that particular moment in time. She swallowed. Her tongue felt like sandpaper. As her eyes began to focus a little more she caught sight of a figure lying next to her, looming through the blurry fog. Sharon raised her hand and roughly ran it down the face she could just about make out, checking if it was really there. As her eyes adjusted the figure became less of a blob and took on the form of Andy. A smug Andy. A smug Andy enjoying the fact that Sharon was waking, on a work day with the mildest of hangovers but a hangover none the less. As everyone switched to Andy's virgin eggnog at the Christmas party so they could drive themselves home, Sharon kept drinking the potent batch that Julio had prepared. Add to that the two glasses of wine she drank in very quick fashion as Rusty went to bed after they arrived home before she dragged Andy into her bedroom by his tie like a cow she'd just lassoed and proceeded to basically sexually assault him. Altogether Sharon had drunk far too much for a school night. In fact she couldn't remember the last time she'd had that much to drink and that had nothing to do with how she curtailed her alcohol intake after getting involved with yet another alcoholic. Getting drunk was just something Sharon didn't do unless she was unbelievably happy and relaxed. Some people drank to excess when they were upset or depressed, Sharon on the other hand knew that didn't help anything so only did it when she was at her happiest.

"Good morning sunshine" Andy said smugly as he gently pushed their lips together. In the course of his life he had experienced more hangovers than he could shake a stick at so couldn't help but enjoy the moment as his usually so in control girlfriend suffered slightly.

In response to his greeting Sharon could do nothing but grunt as she pushed his smug face away from her with the palm of her hand. She sat up quickly, fully prepared to pretend she was fine and get on with her day, anything to wipe the smile from Andy's face. That act didn't last long. Within moments she slunk back down in bed and rolled over to grab Andy, planting her face on his chest, hair everywhere, terrified that her head was literally about to fall off and roll across the bedroom floor. He ran his hand through her hair, taming it as best he could before kissing her on the top of her head. "If you're going to be sick don't do it on me" he said while trying not to laugh. Again Sharon grunted. It would be the only noise she was capable of making until her fifth cup of coffee as Andy drove them to PAB. After that she could only speak in vowels. Complete sentences didn't put in an appearance until after lunch. Thank God she wasn't needed in court.

At the fourth attempt and clad in nothing but one of Andy's dress shirts that she had claimed to sleep in, Sharon dragged herself out of bed and virtually crawled to the shower as he watched from the doorway and tried his best not to laugh (an endeavour that was largely unsuccessful). Giving up as she passed the sink on all fours Sharon accepted her inevitable death and lay on the bathroom floor and waited for God to take her. Moments later she sensed Andy hovering over her and could practically hear the smile on his face. She would have kicked him if only she had the energy to raise her foot more than an inch off the ground. Eventually he bent down and scooped her up, planting another kiss on the top of her head. After quickly shedding their clothes Andy helped her into the shower and proceeded to wash her hair for her as she tried valiantly not to wretch on his feet while maintaining her balance by burrowing her forehead into his chest. The water hitting her face turned out to be a great boon and she instantly felt better but even without a crystal ball it was clear to see that some very strong painkillers and a lot of black coffee were in her near future. Feeling considerably more human Sharon managed to dress on her own, well mainly on her own. Andy had to help her put her bra on as her struggle and complete lack of coordination made her look like a dog chasing its tail as she went round and round in circles reaching for the clasp. He also zipped up her dress and helped her on with her shoes but that was more of a routine they had fallen into over the previous eight days rather than help she actually needed. As he got dressed himself Andy never said a word but the smug smile stayed permanently fixed to his face.

Rusty cooked breakfast, not that Sharon ate any. She had cup of coffee after cup of coffee followed by some painkillers as Andy and Rusty both ate their breakfast in silence and exchanged amused glances. As they left for work Sharon produced something from her bag that Andy didn't see very often, a pair of sunglasses. If there was ever an indication that she was suffering this was it. Andy held her hand as they walked to the elevator and helped her into his car, opening her window assuming the fresh air would do her some good. Still she could only grunt as she drank another cup of coffee like it was going out of fashion.

Sharon dreaded the journey but the breeze from the open window actually made her feel a lot better and she was much like her normal self as she climbed out of the car at PAB. Regardless her sunglasses remained fixed to her face with the murder room suddenly seeming so bright it was like a nuke had gone off in the corner. As she walked through the arrangement of desks on her way to her office and settled in her chair without so much as a wave in response to the numerous 'Good mornings' from her colleagues, not a single member of the division said a word about her fragile state but plenty of grins were exchanged. They had all seen for themselves that she was a little worse for wear when she left the previous night. She wasn't drunk by any stretch of the imagination but it was enough to make her comfortably put an arm around Andy in front of everyone and leave PAB with a rosy huw to her cheeks and Andy's tie in her hand, dragging him with her but it was their Christmas party after all.

The rest of the day was a relatively quiet one. Chief Taylor had assured them at the start of the week that come 5pm they would be leaving for the day and for the holidays and he would not see them again until Monday unless something cataclysmic happened, like the Mayor being assassinated for example. This was a reward for firstly working until long past 10pm on Christmas Eve the previous year when they were supposed to have the day off and also because as a division they missed out on Thanksgiving (but so did Taylor for that matter) because Andy was in hospital having his operation. So not expecting to leave PAB and with Robbery Homicide taking charge of any roll outs, the division set about completing paperwork and trying to clear their desks before the holidays. That wasn't to say the day with smooth sailing. Andy and Provenza were snippy, moody and sometimes downright hostile towards each other and everyone knew why.

In was no understatement to say that both Andy and Provenza were petrified about their friendly round of Christmas drinks in a couple of hours. Ordinarily in the past they would go out together on a double date (like they were permanently living in the 70s) without a care in the world as they tried to pick up women many many years too young for them but in those circumstances they had nothing to lose. Right now they both had everything to lose and that thought had them beyond stressed and terrified. Since the invitation was made five days ago they had discussed it multiple times with the result of each conversation making them even more anxious about what could go wrong. The problem was, even with the use of a safe word to avert potential danger ('Indubitably' had become the most common word in their vocabularies since Saturday) they were still worrying about getting each other into trouble, letting the cat out of the bag so to speak, retaliation being wreaked upon them and an immediate sex ban being issued to one if not both of them. Then the real panic set in as they pondered what the other could actually say in retaliation should they reveal something they shouldn't, what skeletons would be dragged kicking and screaming out of the closet. They both had more than enough dirt on each other to ensure they never had sex again should something go spectacularly wrong. Provenza had Andy suitably petrified about the incident in Barstow in late 2001 with the ping pong balls, something they'd both tried unsuccessfully to erase from their minds. Provenza on the other hand couldn't stop thinking about one woman in particular: Gina Jones. Andy knew what had gone on between them although he prayed every day to forget and knew that she was the only woman in this world (including his coven of ex-wives) who had the ability to send Provenza's balls shooting back up into his body at the mere mention on her name. Andy had never spoken about her since but did that mean he'd forgotten? Provenza was too frightened to find out.

However that wasn't the sole reason that Provenza sat at his desk with a face like thunder. That was because it wasn't just a regular double date. It was a double date that involved Sharon Raydor. It was not that Provenza had any problems with Sharon, far from it. He had long since accepted her relationship with Andy (and had actively encouraged it before he finally asked her out on their first date) and treated her with the upmost respect and affection. She was his respected Captain, the love of his best friend's life and most surprisingly his friend, although he would never admit that out loud. He once loathed the sight of her, 'That Woman,' 'Nurse Ratchet,' 'The Wicked Witch', he now loved her as a friend and enjoyed spending time with her. Regardless the idea of spending an entire evening with a commanding officer in his own home was the stuff of nightmares. It wasn't that it was Sharon, it was that it was his commanding officer and he'd feel the same if it was Taylor, 'The Pope' or the Chief he cared so much about. If anything he was less uncomfortable about the situation because it was Sharon, she almost put him at ease...almost. Unlike Andy, Provenza very much liked to keep something akin to the Berlin Wall between his work and personal lives so going out for a drink or to the baseball with Andy was one thing, having his Captain in his home for pleasant cocktail conversation with his fiancée was another thing entirely. He didn't want Sharon to see him any differently. He had worked hard to build a reputation at work over the years and having his fiancée swap stories about him with his Captain would fly in the face of that and that was without Andy swapping stories he'd rather neither of them ever hear.

Even though paperwork was their sole focus while Sharon battled a hangover and Andy and Provenza spent the day brooding it was anything but a quiet day. To add to the tension between Andy and Provenza a row broke out in the afternoon. It started off innocently enough with Andy fetching Sharon her ninth cup of coffee of the day just after lunch. At the same time he poured himself a cup but before he could drink it he vanished into the corridor on a rather secretive phone call. When he returned ten minutes later his cup was on his desk but the coffee was gone. Provenza immediately got the blame for drinking it despite his continued denials and no apparent witnesses to the crime. At times it became farcical as names were called, insults flew back and forth and at one particularly childish moment a stapler was thrown (but that was by Mike as he tried to shut them up since his earbuds proved ineffective at drowning out the noise).

By the time 5pm arrived everyone left for the holidays in relative good cheer but the row over the coffee had been a bone of contention for most of the day. Neither Andy nor Provenza could stop themselves from making one snippy remark after another much to the annoyance of everyone else. The row was eventually stopped by Sharon who stomped out of her office and threatened to 'Bang your heads together' if they didn't shut up. Silence fell as a result but the glares remained as the tension seemed to hang above them in the murder room like thunder clouds.

With the working day over Sharon and Andy said a quick goodbye to each other in the parking garage before they set off in opposite directions to go home. They had agreed that Andy would drop by around 7pm and pick Sharon up with her staying at his house that night before he temporarily moved back in with her over the holidays the following day.

When Sharon arrived home she was surprised to see that Rusty had already left for the evening. It was a big night for Rusty, it was his first date with Gus. They had decided that since they would be spending Christmas Day together that they needed to have their first date before then just to get that initial awkwardness out of the way. Since Christmas Eve was out of the question because Rusty had plans to finish decorating the tree with Sharon before she cooked dinner upon Andy's arrival and then they all went to Midnight Mass (something Sharon was desperate to do since she opted for the aborted Christmas party at the condo instead of her religious duties twelve months ago), that only left Wednesday night. Despite her bad head that morning it was easy to register just how nervous Rusty was about his impending first date. Rusty's nervousness was the main reason that Sharon would be spending the night at Andy's house rather than vice versa. Sharon felt that Rusty was already nervous enough without him coming home to find her sitting on the couch with Andy, like they were the Spanish Inquisition waiting to interrogate him. If Rusty wanted to share how his date had gone there would be plenty of time for that on Christmas Eve after he'd had chance to sleep on it.

With the condo to herself Sharon had a quick nap, waking much fresher than she'd felt all day before taking a long shower. Her wardrobe choice was easy, selecting a red sundress that she knew Andy was particular partial to. It stopped just above the knee and Andy simply could not take his eyes off her legs when she wore it. After grabbing a thin black jacket and making one final adjustment to her wardrobe Sharon left her bedroom with a wicked smile on her lips but had barely walked into the living room when she heard Andy's knuckles rapping on the front door. She opened the door and felt breathless at the sight that stood before her. Andy was leaning against the door frame in a pair of dark blue jeans, a white dress shirt and his black leather jacket, smouldering. He looked beautiful and Sharon immediately grabbed him by his lapels, dragging him through the door and crashing their lips together. If he'd got his way they wouldn't have left the condo but while Andy was still trying to make any sort of noise come out of his mouth, Sharon grabbed her purse, locked the door and led the way to the elevator.

Meanwhile across town Patrice had been hoping that her other half would arrive home early to help her prepare for the evening ahead. After leaving PAB Provenza had a detour to make and a few things to pick up from the grocery store, including cranberry juice for Andy and yet more wine should the evening need it ('Stilted conversation can always be resolved with wine' he thought), before heading home. He had aimed to arrive just early enough to please Patrice but late enough so that he wouldn't have to actually do anything to help, a fine balance and a tactic he'd perfected during the course of his five marriages. Without meaning to he ended up arriving just five minutes before Andy and Sharon. When Patrice questioned where he had been he had a perfectly reasonable excuse he felt. As he climbed into his car outside the grocery store someone honked their horn at him waiting for his parking space. Naturally Provenza felt it was only right to stay in his car and in that parking spot until one of them died but after the fourth phone call from Patrice wanting to know what was taking so long he relented and drove home but not before he made sure he gave the honking driver the finger. When Provenza eventually arrived home there was just enough time for Patrice to put an extra bottle of white wine in the fridge and give him a stern warning to be on his best behaviour before Andy and Sharon pulled up outside.

On the curb Andy turned off the car engine before returning his hands to the steering wheel, gripping it tightly. The tension in his face was startling as Sharon stared at him, flummoxed as to what his problem could be. She'd seen for herself how Andy and Provenza had been at each other's throats all day long and Andy had never been exactly enthusiastic about their impending double date but even so it was nothing to warrant the expression occupying his face.

"What is wrong with your face?" Sharon finally asked as Andy seemed extremely reluctant to so much as remove his seat belt let alone climb out of the car.

"What do you mean?" he asked as he kept his hands firmly on the steering wheel making it seem like the only way he was exiting that car was if he was dragged by his ankles.

"You look like you're awaiting execution. Is it so hard to spend one evening with your friend? With me?" Sharon said softly as she placed her hand on his as it continued to grip the wheel.

Andy took Sharon's hand and brought it to his lips. "No. No not at all" he said as she couldn't fail to register how sweaty his palms were.

"Then what's the matter?"

"Nothing. It's just..." Andy paused for a moment pondering if he should confess that he was terrified of what Provenza may let slip to her about his past. Then he quickly changed his mind again. "Nothing" he said while his face erupted into a mammoth smile as he gazed at Sharon adoringly.

"What's that smile for?"

"Do you know what's wrong with your face?" Andy asked as he rubbed her hand, never taking his eyes off hers.

Sharon rolled her eyes. She knew this was just cheap flattery and a ploy to make her want to abandon their plans. It wasn't going to work but thought she'd play along regardless. "Tell me."

"Absolutely nothing" Andy said in a husk.

Sharon tried very hard not to shake her head at the corniness of his words. This was yet another delaying tactic. For some reason he really didn't want to get out of the car. "Andy" she said quietly.

"Yes?" he asked, hope written all over his face.

"Get out of the car."

Andy sighed. "I know he took my coffee."

"Andy!" Sharon shouted. "If I have to hear about this cup of coffee one more time I will kill one if not both of you."

Andy turned to Sharon and smiled, squeezing her hand tightly. "It's not too late to drive home and pretend you're sick. Provenza would easily believe you were still suffering with a hangover."

"I haven't had a hangover!" Sharon protested, fooling no one not even herself.

"Of course you haven't but just think about it." Andy moved towards Sharon and slowly started to move his lips up and down her neck, planting soft kisses as he travelled. "If we skip drinks we can get dinner and I can be your dessert." He moved his lips to meet hers, not noticing the unimpressed expression on her face.

"That sounds divine but there's just one thing I want you to do for me first" Sharon said in a sultry whisper.

"Anything. Just name it."

Sharon moved her lips to Andy's ear, biting on his earlobe gently before shouting "Get out of the car now!"

Once again Andy sighed before settling back in his seat and removing his seat belt. He glanced at Sharon before opening the door and climbing out of the car. Sharon laughed to herself as she removed her seatbelt before adjusting the hem of her skirt, pulling it down as far as it would go. Just as she placed her hand on the door handle Andy opened it for her and took her hand to help her out. Despite Andy's assistance for some unknown reason Sharon seemed to struggle climbing out of the car. Andy thought about asking if she was okay but assumed it was maybe something to do with her lingering hangover and knew she wouldn't react well if he brought it up again.

After her ungraceful rise to her feet Sharon quickly pressed her lips to Andy's before setting off on the short walk to Provenza's front door while he retrieved a bunch of flowers from the backseat and locked the car. When he turned Andy's attention was immediately drawn to how Sharon was walking as she ventured up the driveway. As she moved Andy couldn't quite put his finger on what was wrong. It wasn't so much a limp as it was a shuffle. She looked awkward. She looked uncomfortable. She looked...odd. There was something about the way she was moving that reminded Andy of when Provenza once sat on some curling irons at a crime scene. He spent the rest of the day waddling around the murder room with a family sized frozen turkey clamped between his legs.

Andy started to wrack his brain. Sharon had certainly been walking perfectly normally enough while they were at work but had that changed before he came to pick her up that evening. If he was honest Andy had no idea. After Sharon had opened the door to her condo and assaulted him with her lips he was so aroused he didn't see anything except stars until he suddenly found himself sitting behind the wheel of his car with the key in the ignition five minutes later. So if she had been walking peculiarly when they left her condo he wouldn't have noticed but neither would he have noticed a dragon playing a fiddle in the elevator either.

"Are you okay?" Andy asked as he strode quickly to join her side.

"I'm fine."

"You sure?"

"Positive."

"You're walking funny" Andy noted as they arrived at the front door.

"Oh now you notice." Sharon was still perplexed how Andy never noticed she was wearing two different shoes on their first date and subsequently had a pronounced limp. "It's these heels" Sharon said dismissively as she pressed the doorbell.

"Maybe we should go back so you..." Andy said as he turned to go back to the car.

Sharon grabbed hold of his arm and dragged him back to stand with her. "Oh no you don't! Get back here! Don't worry about it."

Before Andy had chance to protest further the front door swung open and an overjoyed Patrice stood before them with her arms stretched open. "Sharon! Andy! How are yo..." Patrice stopped midsentence as she immediately noticed the very faint dark mark under Andy's eye. The bruising from the night time elbow to the face Sharon had given him had virtually vanished by now but in certain lights you could still just make it out if you looked closely enough. "Andy are you wearing eyeliner or have you had a black eye recently?"

"Black eye. I er….walked into a door" Andy said glancing at Sharon.

"You walked into a door? This guy! Can you go a week without injuring yourself? Welcome. Come in" Patrice said. Andy stepped across the threshold and was immediately wrapped into a bear hug by Patrice as Provenza lurked just behind her straightening his tie.

"Hello Patrice. Thank you so much for inviting us over." Sharon joined Andy across the threshold and received the same welcome, a very large hug.

"You're more than welcome. Thank you for coming. This is very long overdue" Patrice said closing the front door. "Louie" she said quietly as she nodded towards their guests.

Provenza took a step forward, clearing his throat. "Captain. Flynn" he said before quickly and uncomfortably kissing his commanding officer on the cheek and shaking his partner's hand.

"Lieutenant" Sharon said with a smile.

Andy hid his grin. "Provenza."

Again Patrice nodded towards their guests. "Louie" she encouraged.

"Oh yeah let me take your jackets." Sharon took her cell out of her purse (in case Rusty were to suddenly call) before Provenza helped her off with his jacket. "Here let me grab that for you." Provenza took Sharon's jacket and purse and moved to the closet by the front door. "Captain you're looking lovely tonight. Flynn, nice er…..pants" Provenza said a little awkwardly.

As Sharon followed Patrice into the living room Andy stayed with Provenza as he removed his leather jacket. "Nice pants?" he questioned.

"I'm being complimentary. It was Patrice's idea." Provenza hung up Andy's jacket in the closet before closing the door and again adjusted his tie.

"Well stop it. It's weird" Andy said as he suddenly realised that he still had his car keys in his hand.

"Oh er….just put your car keys in the bowl" Provenza said without thinking as he gestured towards the small bowl on the table by the front door where he kept his keys.

"In the bowl? Have you invited us to some sort of key party?"

"Like any of us have the energy for that. At this age the only way either of us would get even close to a threesome is sleeping with a schizophrenic" Provenza stated grumpily.

Andy smirked. He was currently filled with the joys of Spring. "Speak for yourself."

"Oh who are you kidding? We're both at an age where an 'all-nighter' means we didn't have to get out of bed to pee." Provenza quickly made sure that Patrice and Sharon were out of earshot before saying "Remember, keep it zipped." To reinforce his point Provenza moved his hand across his mouth as if zipping it closed.

"Like I've been able to think about anything else." Andy followed Provenza into the living room with the flowers still in his hand. Sharon sat in the middle of the couch as Patrice hovered by her twin coffee tables. "Oh er Patrice. For you. A little thank you for everything you did for me" Andy said offering her the flowers.

Sharon coughed to get his attention. "And….."

Andy rolled his eyes. "And for ruining your proposal."

Patrice took the flowers off him and inhaled the scent from the bouquet. "Thank you Andy they're lovely. And how are you feeling these days?"

"Good. Better. Fit as a fiddle. Ready to go back out on…."

Provenza immediately cut him off before Sharon had chance. "Like hell you are. Until I sign the paperwork you're a desk monkey so get used to it."

Andy sighed loudly with frustration as Sharon laughed. "How's your blood pressure?" Patrice asked.

"Under control except when I'm around your fiancé here."

"Let me check your pulse." Patrice put her flowers on one of the tables before grabbing hold of Andy's wrist and looking at her watch. "Any dizziness?"

"None at all."

"Are you telling the truth or keeping it to yourself again?" Patrice asked suspiciously producing a laugh from Sharon.

"Fine, gang up on me" Andy said with a slightly amused glare aimed at Sharon.

"You need ganging up on. Keep still." Patrice pulled Andy's arm closer to her as she kept an eye on her watch. Finally she released his wrist. "You are doing well my friend. Now all you need to do is avoid doors and not do anything stupid and you'll be fine."

"Thank you mother." Andy smiled before sitting next to Sharon on the couch.

"What can we get you both to drink?" Patrice asked as she put her flowers in the kitchen sink.

Before they could answer Provenza spoke up as he moved to the small bar they'd set up for the evening next to the television in the living room. "Flynn will have a cranberry and soda. Captain? White wine?"

"Yes. Thank you Lieutenant."

"The hair of the dog and all that" Andy said with a smirk as he nudged Sharon's shoulder with his.

"Oh shut up" Sharon said quietly as she pushed his smug face away with the palm on her hand once again. She sighed to herself. She was never going to drink more than a single glass of wine again….with the exception of that evening but only to be polite.

Patrice walked back into the living room and sat on the other end of the couch next to Sharon. She knew Provenza would sit in his recliner and if she did likewise it would look like their guests were about to be interrogated. "Okay this needs to be addressed now. Are you really going to spend the whole evening calling each other 'Captain' and 'Lieutenant'?"

"That seems to be the plan yes" Provenza replied as he gave Andy his drink.

"You've never called each other by your first names?" Patrice questioned.

"Well once or twice when the situation called for it" Provenza answered almost sheepishly.

Sharon smiled. "No, never."

"Dear God why?" Patrice asked as she took a glass of wine off her fiancé.

Sharon shuffled forward in her seat, once again pulling the hem of her dress down as far as it would go as she prepared to explain. "Lieutenant Provenza is my second in command and after a rather rocky start in our professional relationship…."

"Huh! That's an understatement" Andy said a lot louder than he intended.

"Oh like you two used to get on any better" Provenza snapped back.

"Indubitably." Andy glared at Provenza. It was their first test of the evening. Since they had been arguing much of the day on unrelated matters it was a good starting point to make sure they both towed the line. Provenza nodded at Andy and the 'safe word' and turned his attention back to pouring Sharon her wine.

Sharon continued. "It's a sign of my respect for him as an officer and our chain of command."

"Makes perfect sense except that you're not at work now" Patrice pointed out.

"Indeed." Provenza crossed the room to his Captain and offered her the glass of wine he was holding. "Your wine….Sharon." The word almost stuck in his throat. Yes he'd used it before but again it didn't matter how fond he was of her he was still uncomfortable with his Captain cosying up to his fiancée on his couch.

Sharon took her glass and smiled. "Thank you Lou..." She stopped. The word just wouldn't come out and she didn't really want it to in all honesty. She knew he was uncomfortable so kept that official wall between them. "Lieutenant Provenza."

Provenza immediately smiled and nodded. "You're welcome Captain. See! Now is that so hard?" He gestured at Patrice as she shook her head.

"Give up now Patrice, it ain't gonna happen" Andy said laughing.

"At least I tried." Provenza sat down in his recliner with his wine as silence suddenly descended over the room. It wasn't a comfortable silence either. "Well this is nice" Patrice said finally.

"Yes" Sharon agreed.

Andy nodded. "Yep."

"Nice" Provenza said before taking a large swig of his wine.

Silence again fell on the room. Provenza and Andy had no intention of saying anything in case they said something that got them into trouble so that just left Patrice and Sharon who didn't know each other at all with the exception of a few meetings in passing as Patrice sat with Andy before his operation. "Well cheers" Sharon finally said raising her glass.

"Cheers."

"Cheers."

"Cheers."

Again the room fell silent. Patrice glared at Provenza to make him start a conversation but he successfully avoided all eye contact. "Someone needs to speak" she said finally. "We look like we've been gathered together to find out who the murderer is."

"Like anyone would actually do that in real life" Andy added. It wasn't much of an ice breaker but at least he said something.

After finally meeting Patrice's glare Provenza shuffled forward in his seat and cleared his throat. "Captain did you get chance to finish looking at that file I put on..."

Patrice was quick to cut him off. "No work talk." She smiled to herself. She knew this was going to be hard work because of how Provenza felt about her spending time with his Captain but hadn't expected it to be this hard.

"Then what are we supposed to talk about?" Provenza asked.

"How about 'How was your day?'?" Patrice suggested.

"I've just spent all day with the pair of them at work. What do you think either of them did without my knowing about it?" Provenza asked. He was met with a glare in return. "Okay! Fine! Captain how was your day?"

"Just fine thank you Lieutenant."

"Flynn?" Provenza added.

"Same old, same old with the exception of my complete pain in the ass partner annoying the crap out of me and stealing my coffee" Andy replied with some venom.

"For the last time I didn't touch your damn cup of coffee."

"Then where did it go?" Andy asked.

Provenza immediately started to get riled up. "I don't know. Did you even get one? I never saw you. Have you ever thought you may have gone a bit senile in your old age?"

"Old age? You've got..."

Sharon let out an exasperated sigh. She couldn't listen to this same argument for the twentieth time that day. "Enough! I can't listen to this argument again!"

"Fine" Provenza said slumping back into his chair.

"Fine."

"Indubitably" Provenza added looking at Andy from the corner of his eye.

"How's your day been Lieutenant?" Sharon asked trying to steer the conversation away from that blasted cup of vanishing coffee.

"Like the gift that keeps on giving." Suddenly Sharon's cell slipped off the couch and bounced between the two coffee tables and not far in front of Provenza. He immediately stooped to retrieve it for her. "Oh I'll get it Capt…."

Before Provenza could reach it a loud cry of "NO!" came from Sharon. Everyone stopped dead in their tracks, a little alarmed by this sudden increase in volume. They looked at her like she had snakes coming out of her eyes. Sharon quickly grabbed her cell phone and slid it on the nearest table. "It's fine Lieutenant. I've got it."

Andy leant in close to Sharon's ear and whispered. "Why are you acting weird?"

"I'm not acting weird" she replied before taking a large gulp of her wine.

Provenza and Patrice shared confused expressions before she tried again to move the conversation along. "Okay how about family. Sharon how's Rusty doing?"

Sharon smiled. "He's good thank you. Great in fact. He's transferring to UCLA in January which is exciting and he's on his first date with Gus even as we speak."

"Really?" Patrice asked. She liked Rusty from the few times she'd met him and knew Provenza to be beyond attached to him despite his numerous complaints.

"He was so nervous I thought I was going to need to sedate him" Sharon laughed.

"No kidding he was getting ready for it before we left for work this morning. I doubt there's any hot water left in the entire building" Andy added.

"Bless" Patrice smiled.

Provenza frowned. "Really? He didn't tell me. He didn't come to me for any advice either."

"We can only wonder why" Andy said with a smile.

"How exciting, young love but I don't envy him the experience of a first date. First dates are awful. To be endured while you make a quick decision if you want to see them again and that's it" Patrice said very matter-of-factly.

Provenza looked beyond offended. "What does that mean? What was wrong with our first date?"

"Do I really need to explain?"

"It would seem so" Provenza suggested.

"Louie I cried throughout our first date because you'd arrested my Granddaughter for murder half an hour beforehand. I cried so much the waiter asked if I was being held against my will and wanted to call the police."

Provenza still looked perplexed. "So? The steak and the wine were good and not badly priced either."

"Oh Louie!"

"Well I had a nice time" Provenza added proudly.

Andy smiled. "As far as Provenza's first dates go that was a good one. You should hear what…."

He was immediately cut off by the cry of "Indubitably!" from Provenza.

Taking the hint Andy immediately and with all the subtly of a sledgehammer, changed the subject. "How about this weather huh? Seems a little warm for December?"

Provenza buried his face in his hands. "Ye Gods!"

Sharon stared at Andy for a moment like he'd lost his mind before turning her attention back to Patrice. "I always liked first dates. The anticipation of the unknown and those butterflies in your stomach. The nervous first few exchanges. Seeing if that spark is there."

"Well it seems like you found yourself a pretty big spark this time" Patrice replied as she looked at Andy.

Sharon turned to smile at Andy, taking his hand briefly. "Don't I know it mainly because he set his menu on fire."

Provenza nearly choked on his wine. "You set your menu on fire?" he asked surprised. Andy hadn't shared any of the details of his first date with Sharon and Provenza was more than happy with that situation. If Andy was happy that was great but Provenza really didn't want to know all of the ins and outs of the situation.

"I was incredibly nervous" Andy stated to try and justify his actions. "Everything you'd ever said to me about asking Sharon out on a date over the previous two years was ringing in my ears and making me….."

Again Provenza was quick to cut him off. "Indubitably."

"You just like first dates because you enjoy interrogating people" Andy said to Sharon as he again steered the conversation away from a potentially dangerous area.

"Guilty as charged" Sharon said as she laughed. "Have you given any thought as to where you want to go on your honeymoon?" she asked Patrice.

Patrice smiled as she glanced at Provenza. "I've been looking into..."

Provenza cleared his throat again. "Well actually Captain we've yet to decide if we're going to have one at all."

"Why?"

Provenza shrugged. "Cost. Getting time off work. The usual stuff."

"I don't think you have to worry about getting any time off work Lieutenant. I may be able to persuade your Captain into letting you have a week off." Sharon winked.

"Thank you Captain but..."

Now it was Patrice's turn to interrupt. "Louie for the last time, it doesn't need to be expensive but even if we spend a weekend in a tent in my sister's back yard we are going somewhere." Provenza glumly looked at the bottom of his wine glass. It wasn't that he didn't want to take his beautiful bride away for a few days after their wedding, it was because he was the cheapest man on the face of the earth and as much as he grumbled about it, he didn't want to take any time off work.

"Isn't there anywhere you'd like to go Lieutenant?"

"Provenza isn't really the vacation type" Andy confirmed.

"That's not completely true, I decided to go on a road trip once. I packed up the car and I wasn't turning back until I ran out of money." Provenza smiled.

"Where did you go?" Sharon asked.

"I made it as far as the end of the street and came back."

Patrice shook her head. "If I get my way I'd like a few peaceful days sitting on a beach with a cocktail and a good book."

Sharon hummed. "That does sound good. I can't remember the last time I had time to finish a book. Have you ever been to Oahu?" she asked.

"No. I could never get Patrick, that's my late husband, I could never get him on a plane so that limited our choices somewhat. So this time Hawaii is definitely an option." Patrice made sure to meet Provenza's eyes, letting him know that whether he liked it or not this was going to happen.

"Why pay all that money and go all the way there when we have perfectly good beaches right here in California?" Provenza questioned as he gestured towards the window even though they were miles from the coast.

"Because Louie you never want to step foot on the beach here" Patrice stated.

"That's because I've seen the crap that washes up on them. You pick one severed head up off the sand and it inevitably puts a damper on the whole experience" Provenza replied grimly.

"Is that the one I kicked?" Andy asked as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

"The same."

Andy laughed. "I didn't think Sykes was ever going to stop screaming."

Provenza raised his hands to his chest to imitate the Detective's cleavage before mimicking her. "'You kicked a head at me! Meh! Meh! Meh.'"

Patrice raised her hands up. "Okay I didn't think I needed to say this but no severed head talk either."

"You brought it up" Provenza protested. Patrice and Sharon looked at him with sheer amazement before turning their attention back to each other and non-severed head related conversation.

"About ten years ago I stayed at the Royal Hawaiian with my kids and my parents" Sharon said as her smile relayed the memory to her face.

Patrice thought for a moment. "Is that the one from...?"

"From Here to Eternity?" Sharon replied as she once again tugged on the hem of her skirt, stretching it further towards her knees.

"Yes."

"That's the one only it's a lot pinker in person. It was lovely. Beautiful beach, lush grounds. It was just gorgeous and so romantic. I'd love to go back" Sharon said as she glanced at Andy, sending him the subtlest of hints for him to file away for the future.

"Did you do the whole luau thing?" Patrice asked.

"Oh yes, you have to."

Before Sharon could continue Provenza cleared his throat. "Where I come from you bury a dead pig because it's got some sort of disease not because you're going to dig it back up again and eat it." As he sipped on his wine Patrice, Sharon and Andy all stared at him in shock, flabbergasted by what they'd just heard.

"Thank you Louie" Patrice said finally.

"If you went to the Bahamas you could swim with pigs?" Andy suddenly announced. Immediately all heads snapped around to face him, giving him the same perplexed expression Provenza had just received. "What? You could" Andy protested.

Sharon and Patrice simultaneously shook their heads. It was clearly up to them to make the bulk of the conversation all evening. "Are you spending any time with your family over the holidays?" Sharon asked as gently as she could. She knew there were certain frictions between Provenza and Patrice's family but hoped that could be put to one side for the holidays.

"Not much no for obvious reasons but Louie's boys are coming by with the grandchildren on Christmas Day so that will be nice."

"Unless they want any money" Provenza stated grumpily. Patrice sighed but at least that remark wasn't about a dead pig or a severed head.

"And I like a nice quiet, intimate Christmas so we don't need anyone else to have a good time." Patrice smiled. "How about yourselves? First Christmas together, that should make it special. Any big plans?"

Sharon took Andy's hand for a moment. "I can't deny that I'm looking forward to it more than usual this year. Andy's daughter Nicole has invited the three of us for dinner."

"That'll be great and no need to cook" Patrice said with a smile, knowing full well how hard and tiring it is to prepare dinner at Christmas for all the family.

Sharon laughed. "Exactly."

"What about your other kids?" Patrice enquired.

"Not this year" Sharon replied with an air of sadness. "Emily is currently in London with the ballet so it was impractical for her to come home this time." It had been the subject of many long telephone conversations over the weeks leading up to the holidays. Emily was insisting on flying back for Christmas but since she would only be in Los Angeles for just over 18 hours before having to fly back to England and her next performance, Sharon assured her that it would be okay for her to stay in London. Emily protested but Sharon remained undeterred in her stance. She would have Rusty and for the first time she would have Andy. Although it had upset her (more than she was letting on to anyone other than Andy) and she would miss her eldest on Christmas Day dearly she would get on okay without her, especially in the knowledge that Emily would be having a once in a lifetime experience.

"Did you know that up until 1913 children in the US could legally be sent by parcel post? But Emily still wouldn't get here any quicker." Andy knew this was a sore subject for Sharon so attempted to lighten the mood but his input into the conversation was once again met with blank and confused expressions coming back at him.

"That's a shame but still Christmas in London, how fabulous" Patrice said ignoring Andy and trying to find the positives in the situation.

Sharon's eyes were still focused on Andy. She shook her head at the nonsense that kept tripping off his tongue all evening. "Agreed" she said turning her attention back to Patrice. "The photos she's sent me of the decorations and the Palace and places like Trafalgar Square look so beautiful and she's having such a wonderful time."

"Where does she normally perform?"

"New York" Sharon confirmed.

"Oh wow! Have you had many opportunities to see her on stage there?"

"A couple but not as often as I'd like and not since she became a soloist at the start of the year. My hope is to see her when she's back from London." Sharon took Andy's hand and smiled at him. "You see there's this guy I know who grew up in Jersey and I'm hoping he'll take me to New York to see Emily and show me all the best places to eat."

"Did you know there's a death in New York City alone every 9.1 seconds?" Andy stated extremely unhelpfully.

Sharon gazed at Andy in silence for a moment, amazement spread across her face. "Thank you Andy. That's comforting to know." She released his hand in favour of fidgeting in her seat and yanking on the hem of her dress once again.

"And you have another son?" Patrice asked.

Again Sharon spoke with a tinge of sadness. "Yes Ricky. He's going skiing with some friends from Palo Alto for the holidays." In fairness to Ricky his mini vacation had been booked long before Emily realised she was going to be out of the country for the holidays. He felt awful for not being there, especially with Emily also absent but once again Sharon assured him she wouldn't crumble without them. As much as she'd miss the both of them with Christmas being such an important holiday for her, she really didn't want to stop her children from living the lives they wanted and having fun. With both kids elsewhere it also avoided some awkwardness. Had they been in Los Angeles Jack would have insisted on seeing them and probably Sharon too but with Andy now on the scene and this being their first Christmas together she didn't want his face and snide remarks anywhere near her.

"Oh to be young!" Patrice replied wistfully. "What about you two?" she said looking at Provenza and Andy. "You're both unusually quiet this evening." That statement wasn't strictly true. They had bickered, they'd made some random statements but otherwise had been fairly quiet and anything but like themselves.

"Well they read my doormat on the way in and that's more than enough social interaction for one day" Provenza muttered before he finished his wine and went to pour himself another glass.

"And what about you?" Sharon asked Andy.

Andy smiled. "Did you know in the UK it's illegal to kill a hedgehog with a machine gun? I mean where would someone even get one from over there?" Once again Sharon and Patrice could do nothing but stare at him, struggling to process the random nonsense that kept escaping his lips.

"Yes thank you for that Flynn" Provenza said to break the silence as he returned to his recliner with a newly topped up glass.

"I love what you've done with the house Patrice" Sharon finally said as soon as she could drag her eyes from Andy.

"Thank you, it wasn't easy, I can tell you that. Did you see what it looked like before?"

"No but I had most of the contents stacked in my living room overnight so I feel like I had a good sense of the place" Sharon stated as Provenza shuffled awkwardly in his chair.

"I think it suits us. A combination of both of our personalities, of our styles. Come on let me give you the grand tour." Patrice stood ready to take Sharon around their small but now very stylish home. With her glass in hand Sharon followed suit but seemed to have difficulty getting to her feet. Everybody noticed. Patrice thought about asking if she was okay but the evening had already been weird enough so far with some of the comments coming from the idiotic men they had fallen in love with without asking what was wrong in front of an audience. "It'll give these two chance to sort out whatever problem they have to try and make their mouths work. Behave yourselves boys." And with that Patrice led Sharon into the hallway and towards the bedrooms.

The moment they were out of sight Provenza shot to his feet, grabbed Andy by the arm and dragged him towards the front door and hopefully out of earshot should they return suddenly. "They say you don't know what you've got until it's gone so I'll appreciate you a lot more if you hurry up and leave."

"What is your problem?" Andy asked confused.

"You! This is like pulling teeth. Did you swallow the big book of weird facts?" Provenza polished off his glass in one large gulp causing him to cough.

"I can't help it! I'm nervous!"

Provenza moved back to the bar to pour himself another drink. "Why aren't you saying anything sensible?"

"Why aren't you?" Andy responded as he joined him.

"I don't know what to say. What's your excuse?"

"You've scared the crap out of me with this whole 'safe word' business. I'm frightened of saying something that gets us into trouble" Andy said in an agitated whisper.

"So best just use the information you've stored up from 'Fact of the Day' toilet paper? Don't you have a filter between your brain and your mouth?"

"Yes but in case it doesn't work best let Sharon and Patrice do all the talking instead."

Provenza's eyes bulged as he looked at Andy like he was the biggest idiot he had ever encountered. "Well we can't both sit here mute, they'll think something is going on, like we're hiding something from them."

"Then what do you suggest?"

"Small talk. Tiny talk. Talk about the weather. Anything! Just avoid animals you can't machine gun in England!" Provenza shouted as quietly as possible.

"Like your dead pig opinions are the height of sophisticated conversation." Provenza glared at Andy again. "Fine! We'll talk about the weather and after that minute has passed then what?"

"Just be casual" Provenza stated as his arms flailed. Silence suddenly fell between them as Patrice and Sharon emerged from the corridor and walked towards the kitchen. Both men smiled at them pretending that all was well when it was anything but. As soon as they were out of earshot again Provenza turned back to Andy. "Engage your brain before you speak."

"What? You think I'm an idiot?"

"Yes. Let me lay it on the line for you Flynn, staying silent is only going to land us in hot water for not making an effort so we need to say something. But remember this if you say anything that results in any sort of sex ban coming my way, I have just as much dirt on you and from my experience Patrice is a lot more forgiving than the Captain so good luck with that."

"If that was your idea of a pep talk to make me relax it didn't work" Andy replied with a scowl.

"What am I? Your cheerleader?"

"Listen Provenza this is the happiest I've ever been in my life so don't you dare screw it up for me." Andy finished his drink, downing it in one like it was a shot. A habit he still had twenty years later in stressful situations even though it couldn't be less alcoholic.

"That makes two of us. Keep it zipped as much as possible and I'll do likewise." Provenza snatched the glass from Andy's grasp before setting about refilling it.

"But we've got to say something" Andy stated plainly.

"Then I suggest we stick to the weather and window treatments" Provenza said unhelpfully.

"What the hell is a 'window treatment'?"

Provenza started to fill Andy's glass up again but instead of cranberry the contents of the bottle he used was green, almost swamp like in appearance. "Beats me but according to Patrice and her decorator friend we have them and they're 'divine'." Provenza handed Andy the glass. "Here."

Andy took the glass and began to instantly drink from it as his eyes focused on Sharon and Patrice in the kitchen, not looking at the contents for even a second. The moment the slime coloured liquid hit his tongue he grimaced and shook his head. "Jesus! What is this? Acid?"

"Yes it's acid. I thought it'd make a nice change for you from cranberry juice." As Andy continued to sip and shudder at his drink his eyes never left Sharon as she followed Patrice through the back door and into the yard. Seeing his partner staring into space Provenza followed his eye line to see him staring at Sharon. He turned back to Andy just in time to see the largest of smiles erupt onto his face. He was loathed to admit it but he'd never seen his partner look so happy. It was...it was...well it was sickening. Provenza rolled his eyes. "Ye Gods! Flynn, let me be honest. I'm pleased for you and the Captain, I really am but your permanent smile is beginning to upset me." Andy didn't say a word but instead moved to the edge of the kitchen bar, his smile only growing larger as he watched Sharon talk. Again Provenza rolled his eyes as he took another large swig from his wine glass. "At this point I'm running out of people I actually like."

In the back yard Patrice had been proudly showing off the deck and water feature that had recently been installed. To make Provenza more agreeable to the changes and the expense that accompanied it she had also bought him a new grill which now sat proudly in the corner, a new coat of polish on it causing it to gleam in the moonlight. Dozens of lights like fireflies were strewed about the yard with some potted plants and a silver table with four matching chairs finishing the scene. "So what really happened to Andy's eye?" Patrice asked as she settled her wine glass on the table.

"Why do you mean?" Sharon asked casually.

"He walked into a door? I was an ER nurse for the majority of my adult life. I know the signs to look out for when someone is lying about how they obtained an injury."

"Did erm….your…." Sharon struggled for the words. It felt odd to her to call her second in command 'Lieutenant Provenza' in front of his fiancée but she just could not bring herself to use his first name.

Patrice shook her head and smiled. "Say it."

"Did Lieutenant Provenza not tell you?"

Patrice laughed. "No, Louie didn't tell me" she replied putting all the emphasis on 'Louie.' "Did it happen at work? That guy needs to be wrapped in cotton. I don't know how you cope."

"No I elbowed him."

"You did it?" Patrice asked surprised.

"Yes in bed." Sharon was surprised with the ease in which she confirmed how she had caused to injure Andy. She had been so embarrassed about it for a variety of reasons mainly because she didn't like people thinking about her in that way but with Patrice she felt relaxed. Maybe the wine was a contributing factor but Sharon couldn't help but find Patrice very easy to talk to.

"You elbowed him in the eye in bed?"

Sharon's head found her hands. "I don't know, I guess I rolled over in the night and forgot he was there."

"You forgot he was there?" Patrice laughed. "Good for you Sharon nabbing yourself a non-snorer. Louie snores like someone is putting a metal girder through a wood chipper. If I didn't love him I'd have killed him by now." Patrice paused for a moment before taking a sip of her wine and pondered asking a question that she hoped wouldn't make Sharon feel uncomfortable. Patrice sat down at the table. "So I hope you don't think I'm prying but I assume that means things have moved forward between the two of you then?"

Sharon slowly and again rather awkwardly sat down next to Patrice. "I suppose your fiancé told you we were taking things slowly." Sharon played with the stem of her glass, her awkwardness that her sex life may have been discussed clearly apparent.

"No. He's not mentioned anything other than to tell me in passing Andy had finally asked you out on a date" Patrice said quietly as she tried to make Sharon feel less uncomfortable.

"Then how did you..."

Patrice smiled again. "He was sleeping down the hall in Rusty's room while he had his blood clot. You don't have your seriously injured boyfriend, who is in need of continuous monitoring no less, sleeping down the hall if you're sleeping together" Patrice pointed out.

Sharon leant back in her seat, the realisation that Rusty handing his bed over to Andy meant that people knew a lot more about her relationship that she first thought hitting her hard. "I bet you think I'm terribly slow and old fashioned."

"Oh Sharon not at all." Patrice took Sharon's hand. "I can't imagine how hard it must have been for you two getting together. When I started dating Louie and Patrick for that matter we had just met. I didn't know them so we were starting off with a completely blank slate. It must have been difficult for both of you going from friends to lovers without the complication of you being his boss as well."

Sharon nodded as she sipped her wine. "It hasn't been easy."

"You don't need to tell me I've seen it first hand at the hospital. I know all about 'office romances' and they can ruin whole careers if you're not careful."

"It wasn't just that" Sharon said as she continued to open up to this wonderfully sympathetic listener in front of her. "I forced him into taking things slowly because I needed to make sure that we could date and work together. I had to know it was possible to do both and that our personal life wouldn't affect our work life."

"Perfectly understandable. What you do is important. You can't compromise because you're afraid to give your boyfriend an order."

Sharon smiled. "But likewise I needed to make sure that work wouldn't ruin what we could potentially have together."

"Then no wonder it took so long for things to move forward" Patrice said brightly. "Best take your time to make sure than rush and ruin the rest of your life." She paused as she smiled widely. "But I bet you wish you'd done it months ago now."

Sharon laughed as her cheeks blushed slightly. "You have no idea."

"Oh I would believe me." Patrice laughed while Sharon's cheeks turned redder by the second. "Sharon Raydor are you blushing?"

"Between you and me I can't keep my hands off him" Sharon said shyly. The tone in her voice made it obvious that Sharon felt slightly embarrassed by her confession. The simple truth was that she couldn't leave him alone and quite frankly she didn't want to for several reasons, all of which were nothing for her to worry about or be embarrassed by. Firstly it had been a while since she'd slept with anyone. It had been more than a while. Six years is an awful long time to go without a 'man-made' orgasm and anyone who hasn't had sex for six years will tell you once you've gone back to that particular well you won't be satisfied until you've drunk it completely dry. Secondly it was because they had waited. They had waited so long that by the time it did happen they were so completely in love with each other the desire they felt for each other was unbearable. After waiting for so long and feeling that way before obtaining that kind of brand new physical connection it was hard to stay away from, in fact she was finding it virtually impossible. Jack had once described her as a 'sexual camel.' He often accused her of storing up all the sexual pleasure she got, one quick fumble was all she needed to last her for months. But as she had proved over the last few days, that couldn't be further from the truth. Although Jack thought differently Sharon did love sex, she just didn't love it was an alcoholic who ignored her and cheated on her for more than half their marriage.

"That happens at the start of relationships" Patrice stated with a knowing smile.

Sharon bit on her lower lip. "I nearly made him pull over on the way here" she said clearly embarrassed. As they drove to Provenza's they came to a stop at a set of lights. Andy turned to smile at her, taking her hand in his and bringing it to his lips. He looked so good and he smelt even better. If it wasn't for her seatbelt and the desire to not get caught engaging in lewd behaviour in public she would have flung herself at him right there and then. As Andy set off again Sharon fanned herself before she opened her window and hung her head out of it like a dog to cool herself down.

Patrice laughed again. "Well cheers to that" she said chinking their wine glasses together.

"I know but I'm in my 60s, not a teenager."

"That's Catholic guilt speaking if ever I've heard it" Patrice said shaking her head.

"I've had words with Him, believe me" Sharon said as she looked skyward. Sharon was Catholic and it was important to her, an important part of her life but she had never allowed her religion to dictate her life. She went to church, she brought her children up within the religion but she was also divorced. In truth she would have divorced Jack a lot earlier than she did had it not been for her religion. Andy also being Catholic and divorced helped, if they were going to be damned, at least they could be damned together. Sharon looked back down from the heavens and caught sight of Andy watching them through the open door making her smile obscenely.

"Every Hail Mary you get after Confession is worth it judging by that smile on your face. But who cares if you're not a teenager anymore? You're not the first woman over a certain age to feel that way. Trust me I know the feeling all too well. Between Patrick and Louie there wasn't anyone else and I didn't think there ever would be. I thought I was closed for business" Patrice said honestly, wanting to open up as much about her own life as possible so that Sharon would feel better. "The sex train had left town and the station had shut. Then I met Louie." Patrice's smile matched Sharon's. "I'd forgotten how much I missed it. It was like releasing a genie from a bottle and between you and me it wasn't going back in again. Had it you know...been a while for you too?"

Sharon nodded, Patrice opening up about her love life clearly having the desired effect and making Sharon relax. "Too long. I'd been going through an 18 month...solo period shall we say and then Rusty came along."

"And that was the end of that."

"Well he did take up all of my free time and then some."

"As he should in the beginning with what had happened to him. When I first took Keisha in there was very little time for anything else." Patrice started to laugh uncontrollably. "Listen to us! We sound like one of those Cosmo quizzes: 'Are you too busy to have an orgasm?'"

"Orgasm? I didn't have time to blow my nose for two and a half years." Sharon and Patrice both rolled about laughing. This immediately caught the attention of both Andy and Provenza who leant on the kitchen bar and tried to hear what was being said, completely unnoticed by the laughing ladies. "So it had been a while but it's not just that, he only has to look at me a certain way and I'm pawing him." Sharon bit her lip. "I'm worried I'm going to kill him."

Again Patrice laughed hysterically. "It really has been a long time hasn't it? You're not going to kill him" she said reassuringly.

"I know because I keep checking his pulse just in case. I have no idea what I'm doing but I check his pulse regardless. It's only been just over a week but if I was a cat I'm sure Rusty would have tried to have me fixed by now."

Again they both laughed loudly. "Oh Sharon. It's so good to talk to you. Why did it take us so long to do this?"

"Probably because of the two terrified looking gentleman watching us in the kitchen."

Patrice turned to see their other halves staring at them with fake smiles on their faces (well Provenza's was fake, Andy's was anything but as he stared at Sharon). Patrice ignored them and moved her focused firmly back to Sharon and the lovely time they were having without them. "Well let's not let them stop us from doing it again in the future."

"Cheers" Sharon said as she clinked their glasses together again.

"Cheers. It feels good to talk about these things with someone going through something similar."

Sharon fanned her face with her hand trying to cool down. "It does but let's change the subject before I stay this colour permanently. How are the wedding plans coming along?"

"Ugh! Don't ask" Patrice replied as she slunk back in her chair.

"Trouble with your family getting on board?" Sharon said hinting at the subject she wasn't sure if she should mention.

"You mean because of how we met?"

"Yes."

"No not really. I mean they don't exactly love Louie, he is definitely an acquired taste after all but they'd sit through brunch with the devil if alcohol and a free meal was involved. It's not that." Patrice sighed. "I love him. I do. I'm crazy about him but his ideas for this wedding are so..."

"The angels?"

"He told you about that?" Patrice asked surprised as Sharon nodded. "That man is full of surprises. He wants a big wedding, no a huge wedding that'll cost a fortune and take months to plan and I just want to marry him" Patrice said honestly. "That's it. I'd have the four of us drive to Las Vegas tonight and just do it in front of 'Elvis' and 'Tina Turner' so I could be Mrs Louie Provenza the Fifth as soon as humanly possible if I could. That's all I want. That's all I've ever wanted."

"The Sixth" Sharon corrected.

"I beg your pardon" Patrice asked confused.

"Mrs Louie Provenza the Sixth. I think Andy has always been classed as his fifth wife" Sharon joked.

Patrice laughed. "That sounds about right."

"Have you told him that? That you just want to get married without all the hoo-ha?"

Patrice rolled her eyes. "Many many times. Getting him to listen is another thing entirely but I guess I don't need to tell you that."

They both laughed again, only stopping when they became aware that the man in question had joined them outside. Provenza stood by Patrice and plastered a smile on his face which was as wide as it was fake. "What may I ask are you two laughing at?" he asked as cheerily as possible.

"Oh wouldn't you like to know" Patrice said glancing at Sharon before turning her attention back to Provenza. "Off you go. Go on, play with your little friend." Patrice gestured towards the kitchen. Provenza stood rooted to the spot for the moment before slowly slinking back inside, never taking his eyes off the ladies. As soon as he was out of sight Patrice turned back to Sharon. "But you're right it would also be nice to avoid a big wedding since things are still difficult with my family because of Keisha."

Sharon sighed. "I'm so sorry."

"Don't be, it needed to be done" Patrice responded with an air of sadness.

"How is Keisha? Doing well I hope."

"Better." Patrice smiled weakly. "Doing much better but that's also a double edged sword because it also means she's now coming to terms with what she did to Toby and that's a can of worms that has been difficult to open."

Sharon leant forward and took hold of Patrice's hand. "I am so sorry this happened." There was no denying that Sharon felt uncomfortable about the situation but at the end of the day Keisha had committed murder and Sharon and her division were only doing their jobs. Mainly because of Provenza they had ensured that they got the best deal possible for her at the time. Twelve months on Sharon was relieved that Patrice saw it the same way and there were no hard feelings on her part.

"Me too but she's getting the help she needs and paying for what she did. Time will heal."

"In time this too shall pass" Sharon said wistfully.

"Exactly. That's what I focus on. Things will get better with time. Time will heal." Sharon and Patrice fell silent for a moment. It was a difficult subject of conversation and almost like the elephant in the room but they were both pleased that it could be discussed without any awkwardness.

Meanwhile in the living room Provenza and Andy remained leaning up again the bar of the kitchen counter and watching their other halves intently. While Andy just smiled at them Provenza twitched and huffed at every single word or laugh they shared. "They're definitely talking about us" Provenza said nervously as Patrice and Sharon could be heard laughing again. "And laughing. Talking and laughing."

"What about?"

"I don't know. Patrice told me to come back over here with you before I could hear anything."

They stared at the ladies for a moment. From their angle they could pretty much see both of them head on. "Can you lip read?" Andy asked.

"Yes. All of these years working together and watching security footage without audio of people confessing to murder I've been holding out on you" Provenza replied with each word practically marinated in sarcasm.

Andy glared at him unimpressed. "A simple 'No' would suffice."

Provenza slowly started to pace back and forth behind Andy. "I don't like this. I don't like this at all."

"Oh what's the big deal?" Andy asked as he turned around to face him. "So they're talking, so what? Wouldn't it make it easier for the pair of us if they were friends?"

"The big deal? If they're having a girly chat…."

"'Girly chat'?" Andy laughed.

"Yes, girly chat. If they're having a girly chat that means my Captain potentially knows things about me I'd rather she didn't."

Another loud laugh from the yard caused them both to snap their heads around to look at Sharon and Patrice. "Like what?" Andy asked, never taking his eyes off Sharon.

Provenza re-joined Andy and gripped onto the edge of the counter for dear life. "Intimate things! Personal things! My particular skill set behind closed doors!"

Andy almost wretched. "Jesus Provenza! Why would anyone want to talk about that?"

"I don't know then whatever women talk about when they're laughing alone in the yard like that."

"Oh calm down. Are you really that worried Sharon is going find out you're not into cuddling?" Andy laughed again.

"It's not funny. I have a reputation to maintain."

"Oh blah, blah, blah."

Provenza smacked Andy on the arm. "This is not a sexism thing but this would never happen if our Captain was a man."

"Why?"

"Because to begin with you wouldn't be dating him and bringing him to my house to have intimate conversations with my fiancée about me." Provenza's arms flailed wildly.

"Who cares? Sharon might be saying the same thing about me" Andy was quick to point out.

"Yes and when Patrice is your commanding officer come back and talk to me" Provenza said before taking another large gulp of wine.

Back in the yard the worried expressions, pacing and wild arm movements had not gone unnoticed. Patrice nodded in the direction of Provenza and Andy. "Look at those idiots. They look terrified."

"I think there are certain worries about personal mixing with professional" Sharon was quick to say. She could understand fully where Provenza was coming from, she felt the same way after all. She wanted her personal life to stay as far away from the work place as possible but she was dating her second in command's best friend and there was no escaping that. Some mingling of personal and professional was bound to happen and they would both have to accept it.

"Then it's something Louie is just going to have to get used to" Patrice stated with little sympathy. She looked back into the house and while Provenza stomped about nervously Andy remained rooted to the spot, gazing at Sharon in a manner that made Patrice feel a little hot under the collar and it wasn't even aimed at her. She couldn't help but laugh in light of what Sharon had already told her about him.

"What?" Sharon asked, confused as to what was so funny.

"The way Andy keeps looking at you." Sharon turned to see Andy. That smile was out in force once again as he leant up the counter and just watched her. Sharon shook her head and returned her attention back to Patrice. "I see your problem" Patrice continued. She paused for a moment. "How is everything between Andy and Rusty now if you don't mind my asking? Better?" Sharon looked at her surprised. "I overheard Louie giving Andy some advice over the phone. It sounded like they weren't exactly close" Patrice explained quickly.

"That's an understatement but it's better now, much better" Sharon said with a smile.

"What was the problem?"

"Rusty wasn't exactly thrilled by the idea of my having a boyfriend" Sharon raised her eyebrows as she sipped on her wine.

"He doesn't like Andy?"

"No it's nothing to do with Andy. Rusty hasn't had the best track record with the men in his life and that includes his Mother's boyfriends."

Patrice nodded. "I see. So it could have been anyone and he wouldn't have liked him."

Sharon fidgeted in her seat, adjusting her dress yet again. "Exactly but things are better. He seemed to turn a corner while Andy was in hospital. I'm not sure if it was spending time with him or seeing my worry but something changed."

Patrice just watched as Sharon uncomfortably moved in her seat once more. "I'm so pleased for you" she said a little distractedly before resolving to ask the burning question. "Okay I've got to ask. Is everything alright with you?"

"Fine. Why?" Sharon asked confused.

Patrice placed her hand on Sharon's on the table. "Look Sharon I know we don't know each other too well, after all that's the whole point of tonight since I think we'll be spending a lot more time together but you've seemed anxious, I suppose is the word, all night. Is it me? Is it Louie? Is he making…."

Sharon was quick to cut her off. "No Patrice, it's nothing." Sharon suddenly felt mortified that she may have upset her host with her rather peculiar actions. "It's…..If I tell you can we keep this just between the two of us?" Sharon asked quietly.

"Of course." Patrice tried to sound as cheery as possible despite the fact that Sharon currently had her worried.

Sharon leant forward. After checking that both men were still on the cusp of the kitchen she moved to Patrice's ear and started to whisper, covering her mouth with her hand in case one of the boys had suddenly picked up a knack for lip reading. Before Sharon could finish Patrice immediately started laughing. She laughed long and she laughed loud. Sharon sat back in her chair and picked up her wine. "It's not funny" she said hiding a smile.

"It is very funny" Patrice said as she continued to laugh. "Oh Sharon you've made my day. Why?"

Sharon leant in close again and whispered in her ear. She pulled away as Patrice burst into another fit of uncontrollable laughter. Just as Sharon was about to admonish Patrice, Andy was suddenly standing next to them with the broadest grin imaginable. "Hello" he said causing Sharon to jump with surprise since her attention had been squarely on the jolly Patrice.

"Hi" Sharon said, hoping Andy hadn't heard anything.

"Have I interrupted something?" he asked as Patrice continued to laugh.

"Nope. Nothing at all. We were just coming back to join you actually."

Patrice stood up with her glass and beckoned Andy back towards the kitchen. "Here Andy make yourself useful and carry something for me."

"Your wish is my command." Before he could follow Patrice he noticed Sharon getting to her feet. Once again she seemed to have trouble standing up and when she walked past him into the kitchen she had a strange hitch to her gate. "Are you limping?" he asked a little concerned.

"No. I'm fine." Patrice started laughing again. "Oh shut up" Sharon said to her with a smile as she walked back into the living room.

Giggling away Patrice opened the fridge and produced a couple of plates of hors d'oeuvres, placing one on the counter before giving the other to Andy and gesturing for him to carry the plate into the living room. As he placed it on the right hand coffee table Sharon was standing in there alone as she stared out the window but once again pulling at the hem of her dress.

"What's wrong with your dress?" he asked.

"Nothing. Why?" Sharon asked innocently.

"You keep tugging on the hem."

Before Sharon could answer Patrice called from the kitchen. "Andy."

Andy turned on his heels and headed back to the kitchen but not before he gave Sharon one more confused look. Once he was gone Sharon turned away and rolled her eyes with a sigh. She wasn't sure if Patrice had overheard their conversation and called Andy away deliberately or if it was just a coincidence. Either way she was relieved and thankful for the interruption. Lost in her own thoughts for a moment Sharon jumped again when Provenza suddenly sidled up beside her after returning from the bathroom.

"Captain let me top that up for you" he said taking her glass off her and moving to the makeshift bar by the television.

"Thank you." Sharon looked about the room for a moment before moving to stand by Provenza's side. "Lieutenant while we're off the clock and we have a moment alone I hope you don't mind but I wanted to take the opportunity to say thank you."

"Thank you? For what?" he asked as he handed her a fresh glass of wine.

"For everything you did at the hospital. For holding my hand and being there for me" Sharon said with a smile. She expected Provenza to be a little uncomfortable at the personal turn the conversation had taken but instead he returned her smile and gently placed his hand on her shoulder.

"Ah well it was my honour Captain and despite the fact that Flynn continues to irritate the crap out of me it was as much for me as it was for you" Provenza said softly as his gaze switched between Sharon's smile and his own feet at a rapid pace.

"Even so it was appreciated more than you'll ever know."

"You're welcome." Provenza nodded moving back towards his recliner before Sharon stopped him with a hand on his arm.

"And thank you for your assistance with Andy's 'paperwork'."

"He gave you the letter." Provenza had assumed it was the case when the truth came out after Andy walked into the murder room with the black eye. He had asked Andy if he had finally given her that tatty piece of legal paper but all he did was smile. Provenza knew that meant he probably had but at least now he had confirmation.

"Yes he did."

"Took the idiot long enough. I just figured that if the worst did indeed come to the worst then you'd rather hear it from him, even on paper, than me" Provenza explained with the softest smile Sharon had ever seen, a smile usually reserved for Patrice or on the odd occasion Rusty.

"Still thank you Lieutenant. It turned out to be the little push that we both needed."

"I'm glad. It was my duty and my pleasure Captain. But for the record I'd like you to know I didn't touch his coffee."

"Lieutenant!" Sharon exclaimed loudly.

Before Provenza could respond Patrice was back in the living room followed closely by Andy carrying another plate of hors d'oeuvres. Sharon took up her place in the centre of the couch, coming to rest on the cushion a little awkwardly once more as Andy positioned the plate on the other coffee table. Provenza returned to his recliner while Andy sat back next to Sharon, taking her hand and holding it in his lap.

"It's not much but if you're hungry there are more in the fridge" Patrice said as she turned the plates ninety degrees before sitting back down next to Sharon.

"It looks wonderful" Sharon said before selecting a canapé and devouring it.

Provenza slowly got to his feet and inspected the food on the tables. Picking up a canapé he eyed it closely. "Are there raisins in this?"

"Yes Louie. What's wrong with raisins?" The sigh that followed the question showed that Patrice had been forced to have this discussion many times before.

Provenza sat back down and sniffed his choice. "Nothing it's just sad." Swallowing his canapé after the minimal amount of chews possible before scrunching up his face he said "Every box of raisins is a tragic tale of grapes that could have been wine." Sharon immediately laughed at him. "See the Captain knows."

"Would it kill you to eat a little healthily?" Andy asked.

"It might" he replied.

"Well tough. You're on a diet. We both are" Patrice stated sternly, letting everyone knew exactly who the boss was in their household.

"What is the point? The more you weigh the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe, eat cake" Provenza proclaimed before raising his foot rest and getting comfortable.

Sharon laughed into her wine. "You could always exercise a little more Lieutenant."

Provenza folded his hands in his lap. "I watch Sanchez run, that's more than enough exercise for one person." In truth Provenza had been known to run when the situation called for it but that wasn't very often. When Julio took not one but three bullets for him as he knocked him out of the way on the roof of the Mall several years earlier, by Provenza's standards he practically sprinted to the helicopter. Likewise when Andy hit the pavement after he fell from the car Provenza put on a Nutty Professor-esque trot all of his own to get to him but of course with the shock from the impact Andy didn't know that. It would take a heart attack to make him move that quickly again.

"Remember Provenza counts putting his pants on as fifteen minutes of cardio" Andy was quick to add. Provenza glared at him as Sharon tried to avoid laughing.

"Are you still on the vegetarian train Andy?" Patrice asked, ignoring the grumpy soul she had agreed to marry.

"As much as possible" Andy nodded. "You should try it. I feel so much better cutting meat out of my life as much as possible. I feel healthier, I have more energy, I..."

Provenza rolled her eyes with such exaggeration it was almost audible. "For God's sake Flynn just eat some meat."

"Why does it annoy you so much that I choose to be vegetarian?" Andy asked. He was desperate to point out the several months that Provenza adopted a vegetarian lifestyle at the behest of Lauren. Provenza had never shown any interest in being a vegetarian before but he'd do anything for that woman. If she had asked Provenza would have ripped Andy's heart out and wore it as a wristwatch. Andy was so tempted to mention Lauren but with the threat of the Barstow incident hanging over his head he thought better of it.

"Vegetarians. You've got no right leaving the house, you should stay at home with a banana" Provenza grumbled.

Andy immediately reacted with annoyance. "What? I didn't say anything" he said defensively after clearly misinterpreting Provenza's use of the word 'Banana' as their earlier rejected 'safe word.'

"Not that you idiot!" Provenza shouted.

"Oh." Andy hid his eyes for a moment with Provenza soon following suit. Sharon and Patrice just stared at them for a moment beyond confused by some of their erratic behaviour over the course of the evening so far.

"What is going on with you two?" Patrice asked with it sounding like more of a demand for answers rather than a genuine question.

"Nothing" Provenza said immediately.

"Nothing at all" Andy confirmed.

"Indubitably."

Patrice and Sharon stared at them again for a moment, utterly bewildered. Eventually they turned their attentions back to each other. "So you like what I've done with the place?" Patrice asked, full of pride.

Sharon nodded. "I do. It's beautiful."

Patrice pointed to the far corner of the room. "I'd like to try and squeeze a futon over in the corner just for extra seating when we have company."

"I don't have the pelvis for a futon" Provenza said quickly.

Andy shuddered. "Now there's an image."

"I have say Patrice I'm really impressed. It really does look lovely. Very homely" Sharon added.

"But now Electronics looks like Provenza's living room" Andy joked causing Sharon to laugh into her wine.

Patrice nodded. She knew full well what had been inflicted on the rest of the division but figured they were better off there than in her house. "The duck lamps?"

Provenza's eyes bulged at Andy. "Don't you dare say a word about my lamps! They add class and character to an otherwise sterile room."

"Well they may be able to fly home one day soon. We've talked about converting the garage into a den" Patrice said quickly to quieten Provenza down.

Sharon smiled. "That's a nice idea."

"Louie never puts his car in there and it's just a place to collect junk and dust."

"And bodies" Andy commented without thinking about the potential consequences.

Provenza became apoplectic almost immediately. "Why would you even say something like that?!" Andy responded with a shrug, truly believing he hadn't said anything wrong.

Patrice looked worried. "Bodies? What bodies?" she asked looking at Sharon who could only shrug with IA having been kept as far away from that particular incident as humanly possible.

"Someone dumped a body in his garage" Andy said very matter-of-factly, again without thinking of the consequences.

"Flynn! Indubitably!" Provenza shouted.

Silence fell on the room for a moment. "You two have been behaving so oddly tonight. I fail to believe this is the first double date you've been on together" Patrice said unaware that she was about to open Pandora's Box.

Andy shuffled awkwardly in his seat, rubbing his hand on the back of his neck a couple of times before he spoke. "We may have been on one before but that was a long time ago" he said almost dismissively.

"And believe me this one is going so much better" Provenza added as he polished off his latest glass of wine.

"For one thing you can stand up" Andy said again without engaging his brain first.

"Indubitably!" came the instant response.

"What? You can" Andy stated as he started to laugh.

Provenza glared at him, it was a death glare, a glare that left little to misinterpret. "What did we discuss?" he asked in an angry whisper.

Again Andy laughed. "Oh come on Provenza it's a funny story."

"Not from where I was sitting."

"Sitting for a couple of hours as well." Andy laughed loudly. Since it had been the topic of conversation the night before at the Christmas party Andy honestly didn't see any issues with raising it again.

"If memory serves I only got myself into that predicament because of you." Provenza wagged a finger at Andy as he sat forward, almost like he was ready to attack.

"Me? What did I do?" Andy asked innocently. "Did I force the pill down your throat? No. I wasn't even there."

"No but it was your suggestion to pick them up in the first place" Provenza correctly pointed out.

"Hey all I said was they were hot and we should consider giving flight attendants a go some time, you're the one that asked them out on a date." Andy's version of events was very different to Provenza's. Yes it was Andy's idea and yes Provenza was the one to ask them out but only after Andy spent an hour filling him with wine and encouraging him to do it.

"Fine blame me. It's always my fault. I steal your coffee, I ask the drug mules on a date" Provenza flailed wildly as Patrice and Sharon stared at them a little shocked and amused by what they were saying.

"It is! Half the crap I've got it in the neck for over the last fifteen years has been your fault" Andy said as he raised his voice for the first time.

"Like what?"

"Like that crappy lock on your car" Andy said quickly. "Why didn't you just paint 'Steal me and the crucial evidence in the trunk!' on the windshield?"

"Are you still complaining about that? I got a confession out of her didn't I? And you're accusing me of having a crappy car? You?" Provenza asked as he mentally listed every time he had sat on the side of the road while Andy attempted to start his latest wreck of a car.

"Okay how about making me serve those papers for your lawyer friend?"

"You're blaming me for that? Did I shoot the guy? You weren't complaining when you were getting two thousand bucks out of it."

"But I didn't get two thousand bucks out of it" Andy shouted. "I got suspended and ended up two grand out of pocket." Sharon and Patrice shared a quick look of amused concern. Andy and Provenza had finally started to join in the conversation but it was clear that this could escalate very quickly.

"So did I! Did you hear me complain?" Provenza asked.

"Only every damn day."

Provenza sat back and glared. "Is that all you got?" he asked, daring him to open his mouth again while he bided his time to respond with something equally as embarrassing.

"How about you were the one that dropped Ray Hodge's coffin down a flight a steps and I got grief for it. Because of you the Chief got the crap kicked out of her and the division got sued."

"Yes and because of me a body was found and a murderer was put away for life, what a tragedy that was!" Provenza said sarcastically. "And you were already getting grief for that ridiculous eulogy. Handcuffing a stripper? His widow was listening!"

"You didn't think it was so ridiculous at the time. You were laughing so hard you shook more than downtown during a quake. In fact if memory serves it was your idea for me to use that story in the first place" Andy pointed out.

"Only because every other story you tell makes you sound as dull as dishwater."

With that Andy's blood began to boil. "Really? Well let me tell a few now, see if I can find you an interesting one. How about the trouble you got me into with the body in your garage." Since Provenza had reacted so strongly at the mere mention of it moments ago Andy saw the perfect opportunity to twist the knife since it was clear he really didn't want Patrice to find out about it.

"I didn't murder her asshole so how exactly was that my fault?"

"No but it was your fault the body got moved" Andy said again.

"How was that my fault?"

Taking the moral high ground Andy pointed out "I was trying to call in it. You're the one that wanted to still go to the Dodgers game."

"We had Skybox tickets! And again if your car wasn't so crappy we wouldn't have found it in the first place and almost got ourselves fired in the process."

"Don't blame me. I'm the one who saved the day before a deal could be made" Andy stated proudly.

"By calling in a bomb threat!" At that Sharon's mouth dropped open as she stared at Andy utterly gobsmacked. Knowing she was paying him very close attention and didn't look at all impressed Andy glanced at her from the corner of his eye as he started to yank on his earlobe, his stress not helped by the smug smile on Provenza's face. "Oops! Sorry, I probably shouldn't have said that in front of the Captain but then you two tell each other everything anyway!"

Andy rolled his eyes. "Are you still pissed over that kiss?" Andy couldn't believe how unreasonable Provenza had been since the events of his previous wedding night were revealed especially as it was Provenza who told everyone in the first place. "I didn't tell Sharon. You're the one that did that and for the record I did nothing wrong. You're the one with the terrible track record, present company excluded" he was quick to add as he looked in Patrice's direction with a warm smile, "in picking women which led to you sleeping in my bed and making a move on me in the first place."

"No Flynn, Sharon was not the problem" Provenza said as he cringed at having to mention one of the names of his ex-wives, something he'd already warned Andy he wanted to avoid in front of Patrice. "The problem was you removed my pants and handcuffed me to a stripper when you knew how pissy she'd get if she found out." Patrice resisted the urge to laugh as she chewed on her lip and stared intently at him.

"Oh don't get your panties in a bunch you needed a bit of fun before that woman removed your balls and wore them as earrings for the second time no less. Well fun other than trying to the get the phone numbers of potential suspects in an interview room" Andy said with an air of superiority like he'd never done anything as ridiculous when in truth he'd done much much worse.

"No much better to get the phone numbers off strippers at crime scenes! Or I don't know flirting with a woman when she was in the middle of robbing a jewellery store! Is it possible for you to walk past a woman without trying to pick them up? But if you really want to talk about unwise choices in women, let's go directly to the biggest of them all!" Provenza shouted, being very careful to not look in the direction of his Captain in case she jumped to the wrong conclusion, a conclusion Andy was more than prepared to jump to without assistance.

"Don't you dare bring Sharon into this!" he said with venom.

"I have no intention of mentioning the Captain" Provenza said horrified that Andy would even suggest such a thing. "She's the best thing that's ever happened to you! Frankly you don't deserve her and if you screw it up you'll find I'll be front of the line ahead of the rest of the division to put a foot up your ass." Provenza fell silent for a moment as he nodded at his Captain. He meant every word. If Andy ever did anything to upset Sharon or even so much as casually glance at another woman then Provenza would instantly forgo their friendship to beat the crap out of him. Sharon smiled, her heart swelling as she looked at Provenza but before she could respond the argument started up again. "When I say 'unwise' I mean that blond scam artist who locked you naked on the balcony of your room at the Roosevelt and then robbed you." Sharon's mouth dropped open as she stared at Andy. The responses of their significant others going unnoticed as the argument raged Andy and Provenza both realised that they'd reached the age where they knew they probably shouldn't be saying what they were but then thought what the hell let's see what happens.

"Provenza! Indubitably!" Andy shouted at the top of his lungs, beyond mortified that he would bring up that particular incident in front of Sharon. He desperately wanted to turn and see her reaction but couldn't bring himself to see those eyes glaring back at him.

Provenza sat back in his chair completely satisfied with the revenge he had attained. "Not so much fun now the shoe is on the other foot is it?"

"Oh and you've never been scammed by a pretty face."

"Not naked on a balcony" Provenza pointed out smugly.

"No just by drag queens."

Provenza's face immediately turned red. "I told you to forget about that!"

"Oops!"

"It was one date and he looked more like a woman than any man I've ever met" Provenza explained as he tried to defend himself.

"What gave him away? The Adams Apple or the fact that his hands were so big he could pick up a basketball with just one? Hey it wasn't George Andrews was it? Louie?" As Andy used Provenza's first name for only the second time in his life he had gone past the point of no return. He knew he was going to have a hard time explaining away his 'naked on a balcony' history so if he was going to spend the holidays sleeping on the couch without sex he was now determined to take Provenza down with him.

Provenza scoffed. "You want to talk unwise choices? What do you call a recovering alcoholic dating a heroin addict?"

"That was not heroin! She was diabetic! That was insulin" Andy said without fooling anyone.

"Don't give me that BS" Provenza said rolling his eyes. "A $200 a day insulin habit? And didn't she sell your TV? How many women have robbed you in your life Flynn?"

"Robbed me? Hey at least they only took my stuff. Let's discuss how many women have robbed you of your dignity. Let's start with Lauren and work our way up from there" Andy said as he waited for Provenza to respond to one of his trigger words: Lauren. Andy knew better than to bring her up but he was beyond caring at that point.

"Flynn I told you never to use her name around me again!"

"Is there a woman's name I can use around you? None of your four ex-wives that's for certain. Do you have to propose to every single woman you meet?"

"So I shouldn't be getting married again is that it?"

"No. I've never seen you this happy before. Patrice is a wonderful woman" Andy said quickly as he made eye contact with Patrice, ensuring her he meant no offense. However this kindly glaze went unnoticed since by this point Patrice and Sharon were so stunned by the argument taking place neither really noticed where he was looking. "I'm talking about every other twenty-five year old that couldn't walk past you without you putting a ring on their finger and signing away the remnants of your pension."

"Twenty-Five? Listen here buster you're the one that's consistently gone younger as you've got older. Thank God the Captain took over when she did or you'd probably be dating sperm by now." Provenza shifted forward again as he wagged his finger at Andy. "And at least I can commit. I don't sleep with the nearest blonde I find when things start to get even remotely serious." Sharon tried not to react to this latest revelation and Andy's history of infidelity but her heart instantly dropped. The argument was no longer funny, it was exposing issues that Sharon had tried hard to ignore and forget. Patrice instantly noticed Sharon's uncomfortable shuffle in her seat, taking her hand and squeezing it. Provenza closed his eyes for a moment, mortified, realising that he'd inadvertently caused his Captain to question the stability of her relationship.

"Indubitably!" Andy shouted.

"Don't you indubitably me! You started it" Provenza shouted like a five year old arguing with his brother in the back of a car.

"Fine I started it and you end it like you end men for women. You turned one woman into a lesbian and another one into a Nun!" Andy smugly pointed out causing Patrice and Sharon to again bite on their tongues to stop from laughing. It was a welcome relief for Sharon after what she'd just heard.

"This is ridiculous! I did not turn Barbra into a lesbian. She was a lesbian when we met. I made her heterosexual. Briefly. And Sandra had a religious calling. That had nothing to do with me. I may be physically and intellectually superior to the vast majority of men out there but even I can't compete with God."

"Ah potato, potato."

Provenza smiled broadly as Andy immediately looked worried as a result. "Fine if we're playing this game. How about the time you called me to rescue you because some woman had handcuffed you to your bed and superglued your unmentionables to your leg!" Sharon and Patrice almost choked on their wine as they tried not to laugh.

"Provenza!"

"Not so chatty now! Did you think I wanted to see that sight? Uncuff you and help you bunny hop to the emergency room?"

"Provenza! Banana! Banana!" Andy screamed as he tried his hardest to end it once and for all. All this did was to cause Patrice and Sharon's eyes to widen at the random use of fruit that now came into the rather heated discussion.

Completely ignoring Andy's cries of 'Banana' Provenza continued to attack him. "Rule number one: Don't sleep with your girlfriend's sister! Rule number two: Don't let her find out about it. Why do I always have to rescue you when you're naked? Don't you ever get into trouble with your clothes on?"

Andy stood up and moved in front of Provenza. "You're going to lecture me on cheating? The man who has slept with every babysitter he's ever met?"

Provenza joined Andy on his feet and squared up to him. "I've got one word for you buddy: Barstow!"

Andy's face immediately dropped. "Banana! Okay! Banana!"

"Don't you give me banana!" Provenza said almost tauntingly.

"Fine! I'll give you this instead: Gina Jones!" Andy spat at him.

"Flynn! Banana!" Provenza suddenly said as the worry became etched across his face.

"Good luck getting your balls back out of your body again!"

"Balls? Like ping pong balls?"

"Don't you dare!" Andy cried.

"Now what was her name?" Provenza uttered as he pretending to think, knowing full well the name of the woman in question.

"Provenza! Banana!"

"Banana!" Provenza replied, acknowledging that they should end this 'discussion' now before the situation got any worse.

"Banana!" Andy repeated.

"Banana!"

Andy and Provenza both fell silent, the air around them almost visible, thick with the anger and bile that had just been spilled into it. Suddenly their shoulders slumped as they realised what they had just done and more importantly who they had just done it in front of. Very quickly they returned to their seats and sat down, looking like naughty school boys waiting to be read the riot act. Sharon and Patrice looked at them in utter amazement. Neither could quite believe the turn the evening had taken especially since they had been having such a wonderful time together. They were both beyond amused by what had been revealed but that was overtaken by the anger and disappointment that it was packaged within an argument, an argument with such venom. "Well we wanted them to talk" Patrice said finally as she smiled at Sharon.

The rest of the evening past by without incident. Sharon and Patrice continued to talk easily with each other about anything and everything, meanwhile Provenza and Andy sat silently brooding, occasionally glaring at each other and trying to issue blame on the other for what had happened. Every now and then they would try to catch the eye of their respective lady love in an attempt to gage their mood and perhaps show contrition. On other occasions they would laugh at a joke made but each time they received a glare back from the ladies, silencing them immediately, their subsequent penitent behaviour erasing nothing as they were left without any doubt just how much trouble they were in for having a blazing row on an evening of nice friendly Christmas drinks.

By eleven o'clock the evening drew to a close with the strain and tiredness of the previous case showing on the faces of the three LAPD officers. As soon as Sharon and Andy stood up to leave Provenza shot to his feet to retrieve their jackets without being asked before helping Sharon on with hers. Andy's was unceremoniously dumped on the floor at his feet, a childish flourish on behalf of Provenza which went unnoticed by everyone except Andy.

"Thank you so much for inviting us over Patrice. I've had a lovely time" Sharon said sincerely as she embraced Patrice in a long hug. Despite the small hiccup in the middle (which would be dealt with as soon as they could get Andy and Provenza on their own) it had been a wonderful evening and a great success.

"Me too" Patrice replied.

"It's been so good to talk about...things" Sharon said as they pulled apart with a brief nod towards the yard and the more personal conversation they had out there earlier.

"Likewise. We need to do this again soon. Have a lovely Christmas the pair of you" Patrice added warmly with a glance towards Andy.

"You too. Goodbye Lieutenant" Sharon said as she moved towards him and gave him a friendly kiss on the cheek.

"Captain" was all he could say in reply, clearly embarrassed.

"Bye Andy" Patrice said, kissing him on the cheek.

"Thanks a lot Patrice." Andy turned to Provenza and reluctantly put his hand out, waiting for him to take it as he stole the opportunity to be the bigger man in front of both Sharon and Patrice. "Provenza."

"Flynn." Provenza took Andy's hand and shook it firmly, squeezing harder than he needed to under the circumstances.

"Bye" Sharon said once more before she stepped out of the house and into the cooler night air with Andy following very quickly and very closely behind her.

As soon as they were out of earshot Andy made his move. "Sharon…."

Before he had chance to finish Sharon raised her hand and Darth Raydor put in an appearance. "Not yet" she warned.

As he shut the front door Provenza turned around to face Patrice with his best smile in place, ready to charm her and get back in her good books. "Patrice." He opened his arms as if he expected her to immediately run into them.

Patrice walked straight into the kitchen. "Oh don't even think about it Louie."

Back outside as they walked to his car Andy's hand hovered by Sharon's lower back but never quite making contact, the fear that she'd slap it off her all too real in his mind. His instinct as always was to be gentleman and therefore shepherd his date towards their transport as he kept his hand just millimetres from her back, too afraid to close the gap. Before Sharon could place her hand on the door handle this instinct kicked in again and Andy bounded towards it and opened it for her.

"Here let me get that for you" he said with a smile as he held the door open. "My lady" he added with a bow.

As Sharon rather awkwardly climbed into the car she didn't say a word, in fact she didn't so much as casually glance in Andy's direction. Once seated with her seatbelt on Sharon again adjusted the hem of her dress, tugging it down as far as it would go before placing her hands very deliberately in her lap. She then sat in silence, staring straight ahead and waited. Andy closed the door and slowly walked around to the driver's side, his smile fading with every single step he took. He sat down behind the wheel and did his best to plaster a grin back on his face as he glanced at Sharon but her eyes remained fixed forward and completely unyielding. Andy started the engine before laughing to himself. "You know I..."

With her eyes still fixed forward Sharon was very quick to cut him off. "Andy" she said calmly.

"Yep?" he asked filled with expectation and hope.

"If I were you I'd go back to being very very quiet" Sharon said quietly as she again stroked the hem of her dress, refusing to meet his eye for even a second.

"Yes ma'am" Andy replied as his shoulders slumped before pulling away from the curb.

The car ride home was a silent and awkward affair. Even though it was late December it was still a relatively warm evening but that was not the cause of the beads of sweat that had formed on Andy's forehead. One of Andy Flynn's defining characteristics was that he wore his heart and his emotions firmly on his sleeve for all to see. His facial expressions and demeanour as he drove painted a very clear picture. He was worried, he was stressed and he was more than a tad upset with himself. He was in trouble, a lot of trouble with the love of his life and he knew it. He knew Sharon had been looking forward to the evening since Provenza handed her the invite in his kitchen. It was the first time they'd been out with another couple on anything approaching a double date and Sharon was thrilled at the prospect of getting to know Patrice better along with a glance at a more informal Provenza whose company she enjoyed more and more with each passing day. But he had to ruin it. He had to take the bait and run his mouth off and end the evening with an argument. At the back of his mind he was also worried about what Sharon may think of him, not because he had made a scene with Provenza, that was hardly anything new, but more what was said about him. A not particularly pleasant side to his past had been laid bare and screamed about for her to hear without any justification for his actions, not that he had any. Even after he stopped drinking Andy Flynn was still a Grade A asshole and he was not afraid to admit it. He had done a lot of idiotic things and he had treated a lot of women absolutely appallingly. He was ashamed. He'd been ashamed of his past for a very long time and tonight was no exception. He had hoped that a lot of those incidents from his past would have been kept secret from Sharon until his dying day when his surviving friends from the force would swap stories about him at his funeral, turning the air blue in the process but now she knew everything, she knew about the more amusing incidents but she also knew about his frequent infidelity and she didn't look impressed. In fact Sharon looked as mad as Andy had ever seen her and he had pissed her off a lot before she became his commanding officer.

As Andy's mind raced and he questioned what sort of damage had been irrevocably done to his relationship he tugged on his earlobe frantically. It didn't help. If anything he was on the verge of yanking it off rather than relieving his stress even a fraction. Sharon on the other hand was the very definition of cool and calm as she kept her eyes forward and maintained a stony expression. In actual fact it was all an act. An act that was a lot harder to maintain than Andy realised. The truth was Andy wasn't in any real trouble, far from it. Neither was Provenza for that matter. Yes Sharon was mad at him for having the argument and making the evening unbearably awkward thereafter and she was determined to make sure he knew how pissed she was but that was it. As far as Sharon was concerned she didn't care what they argued about just that they argued and spoiled the evening. Everyone has a past and if Sharon was honest the way that it all came out combined with the inappropriate and rather random screams of fruit made both Sharon and Patrice want to cry laughing. That's not to say that Provenza's words about Andy cheating the moment his relationships got serious didn't send a jolt of lightening through her but she already knew that and had decided to take a chance on him regardless. She wanted to speak to him about it sooner rather than later for that sense of reassurance despite the fact she trusted him but that was the extent of the trouble he was in. However the guilty and worried looks on the faces of the pair of them as they sat in silence for the rest of the night, combined with the not so small fact that they had completely ruined a perfectly lovely evening meant both Sharon and Patrice could afford to torture them a bit for fun before letting them off the hook.

Five minutes into their journey with the coldness radiating from Sharon doing nothing to stop Andy from sweating profusely, they reached a crossroads and a dilemma for the man behind the wheel. Sharon had thus far managed to avoid letting her true feelings slip and as a result Andy expected to spend the foreseeable future in the doghouse only he wasn't sure which doghouse that would be exactly. As they stopped at a set of lights, driving straight on meant they were going back to Andy's, turning right meant going back to Sharon's condo. The plan at the start of the evening was that Sharon was coming back to his house so that they could spend the evening without Rusty down the hall meaning they could do what they liked where they liked but that was before, before he'd put his foot in his mouth and chewed up as far as his kneecap. Andy quickly thought about asking if Sharon still intended to come home with him but that left the possibility open for her to say 'No' or rather scream it at him loudly before calling him an 'Idiot' and insisting he call her 'Captain' again before ruling out any further chance of seeing her naked again this decade. The other option was to simply drive as if nothing had happened and hope Sharon didn't suddenly tell him to take her home instead. Not feeling brave enough to ask, Andy set off towards his house.

With Sharon still silent and more than perfecting her frosty exterior Andy pulled his car onto his driveway and turned off the engine. He immediately turned to Sharon ready to dazzle her with his winning smile and see if the ice was beginning to melt but she had already removed her seatbelt and was climbing out of the car. By the time Andy had climbed out himself and locked the car Sharon was waiting patiently outside his front door, staring at the wall and avoiding all eye contact. Andy quickly sprinted over to her and unlocked the door with Sharon again disappearing inside without so much as a glance in his direction. This only served to confuse Andy. Although her demeanour suggested one thing, her actions said another. She wasn't speaking to him, she wasn't even looking at him and yet she'd walked straight into his house.

Once inside she kicked off her shoes and hung up her jacket and purse by the door which was another indication that perhaps she intended on staying the night and maybe he wasn't in as much trouble as he thought he was. Sharon leant against the back of the couch and yawned, the late night, long drive and the discipline involved in keeping her angry facade in place taking a toll on her. Seeking a quick end to the silence and the uncertainty Andy sensed weakness in her suddenly tired looking exterior so smiled and moved to kiss her on the cheek. Before he got too close Sharon saw him coming and was quick to move away from him and walked straight into the kitchen without saying a word, the door closing behind her. Andy stared after her, completely bewildered as to where he stood.

Andy sat on the arm of his couch briefly and sighed. His head suddenly hurt like someone had put an axe through it. As he rubbed the back of his neck with one hand he tugged on his earlobe with the other. Throughout their relationship thus far Sharon and Andy hadn't had so much as a crossed word between them which was surprising since they worked together and dated (something that pissed Provenza off immensely. 'Not arguing is not normal' was a frequent titbit that came Andy's way). They admittedly hit a small bump in the road during Andy's convalescence when he could become quite snappy in an instant when he got fed up with being mothered but that was it. The problem was they hadn't really argued now but it was clear just how mad Sharon was at him with a blazing argument seemingly waiting for him on the other side of the kitchen door. They had been living in a five month honeymoon period where everything had gone perfectly until now and he didn't know what to do. He never did in these situations. Andy was very deft at getting himself into trouble but was rather inept at getting himself out of difficulty hence why his relationships were nothing more than a string of one night stands sandwiched between his ex-wife and now Sharon. One thing was for certain, he loved Sharon. He loved her more than he ever thought was possible to love another person and he needed to fix it as soon as possible. With that thought in mind he sighed once more before standing and slowly walking towards the kitchen like he was taking the long walk to the gallows.

As he walked through the kitchen door he was surprised to see Sharon sitting on the kitchen counter, in the corner opposite the door with her legs slowly swinging. For the first time since he'd finished his argument with Provenza, Sharon looked him in the eye. Whereas he'd been hoping to see those emerald eyes filled with love and forgiveness they remained cold, unfriendly and more upsettingly for him, disappointed. Andy leant up the counter by door as he looked at his feet and searched for the words he needed that would make everything okay again. His hand rubbed the back of his neck, once, twice, three times, he looked like he had fleas.

"I thought tonight went well" Andy jokingly said finally as he met Sharon's ice cool gaze. "It's sort of funny really" he added laughing. Sharon's face remained expressionless causing him to stop laughing instantly. "Well I thought it was funny. Evidently you disagree." He paused for a moment unsure of what he could say that would actually make her speak even one word to him. Finally he resolved that he had to face it head on. "So, how much trouble am I in exactly?"

"What makes you think you're in trouble?" Sharon asked in a quiet, neutral tone. It was a tone that Andy had heard countless times before but usually in the confines of an interview room when they were on the same side of the table.

"I'll start with that terrifying but beautiful look on your face and move on from there." Andy knew that this situation required more than cheap flattery but didn't think it would hurt under the circumstances. "You haven't looked at me like this since you worked at IA. It makes me feel like I have another month of sensitivity training in my future" Andy joked.

"Oh Andy that's the least of your worries."

Andy smiled. It was his filthy smile, the smile that had been getting Sharon into all sorts of trouble over the last nine days in particular and usually made her putty in his hands in a matter of seconds. Andy was amazed when it had no effect as she just sat there expressionless. In reality Sharon could feel her heart fluttering and he cheeks growing warm. She tried to ignore it, tried very hard to remain neutral so that she could torture him for as long as possible. "Sharon" Andy said warmly as he quickly crossed the kitchen to her, intent on joining their lips together.

"Nope" Sharon said quickly as she put her hand on Andy's chest to stop him from coming any closer. "Go and stand over there." Sharon pointed towards the counter on the opposite wall as Andy continued to smile. "I mean it Andy. Over there." Andy reluctantly started to back pedal with his hands in the air. "All the way over there" Sharon demanded. Andy stopped when his hips banged into the cabinet. "Put your hands on the counter where I can see them."

Andy continued to smile as he gripped the edge of the kitchen counter, making sure Sharon could see his hands and he was doing as instructed. "Do I need to spread my legs? Are you going to frisk me?" he asked with a wink.

Sharon crossed her arms. "Oh there's a zero percent chance of any 'frisking' going on in this house tonight."

Andy's face immediately dropped, his worry and upset evident but Sharon remained undeterred in her attitude. Sharon assumed, and she was right to, that Andy had never had to apologise to a woman before (with the exception of his ex-wife and perhaps his mother) because his smile was so unbelievably effective. It was so effective that Sharon was in a battle not to crumble to it as she sat on that counter and just fling herself at him. His smile was beautiful and not the filthy one he reserved for her alone, this was his regular day to day smile. Andy Flynn's smile was like one of the Seven Natural Wonders of the World. A smile from that man probably had the ability to make a woman's ovaries twitch if not actually miraculously get her pregnant. It occurred to Sharon that in the past Andy only needed to smile at a woman he'd upset and before she knew what was happening her underwear would be flying across the room and all was forgiven. Sharon also assumed that his smile had been quite effective in the witness box in the past. He only needed to dazzle the female members of the jury with it and if he claimed Jesus had kicked a kitten through an electric fan, they'd believe him. It was so good half the men on the jury would probably be going home to question their sexual preference as well. Still Sharon refused to be moved by it for the time being since she was not done being mad at him. In that moment she was reminded of her Grandmother. She was a very traditional Irish lady, heavy emphasis on the word 'lady' despite the fact that she claimed to have slept with half the village she grew up in just outside Kilkenny before the age of 18 (one of the many reasons why she encouraged Sharon to keep her knees together before she was married) and had all the characteristics of a mole with heavy asthma. She once told Sharon that it was good to torture your man from time to time when you had the chance because there would be many many times you'd regret not taking the opportunity. Not exactly words of wisdom to live by from a woman who also said 'If it's and ands were pots and pans your mother would be your father' and who spent the latter part of her life talking to a hat stand called Mr Jessop but Sharon was happy to run with it if for no other reason than she found Andy so unbelievably sexy when he was pouting and miserable. Sharon took a deep breath, keeping up her cold, stony exterior was hard and it was getting harder with every smile, wink and pout Andy produced.

"I see" Andy said glumly. "So are we talking a sleeping on the couch scenario here or...?"

"Why would you sleep on the couch?" Sharon asked quickly. Andy immediately smiled as his shoulders began to rise, his relief almost palpable. "This is your house after all. I can simply call a cab and go home" she pointed out crushingly.

Andy's smile instantly vanished as quickly as it arrived. "Okay. Good point. What can I do to fix this?"

"Try apologising."

"Absolutely. No problem. Sharon, sweetheart I'm so sorry" Andy said with complete sincerity. He continued. "Have I always been a saint? Not at all. Have I learned from my mistakes? I like to think so. Were my actions tonight idiotic? Possibly. Did I ruin the evening? Without a shadow of a doubt. But am I sorry? Absolutely" Andy added with a smile.

Sharon just stared at him for a moment. She'd heard this speech countless times before. The words changed but the sentiment and the delivery were always the same. "Not to me. To Patrice and Lieutenant Provenza."

"I am not apologising to Provenza!" Andy shouted. "It was his fault! He was the one that…." Andy took a deep breath as his tone softened and he realised that approach was only going to make matters worse. "I'm sorry, he'll never hear those words from me but I'll apologise to Patrice and to you. I am sorry Sharon."

Sharon just stared at him for a moment. "Sorry that I'm mad at you or sorry for ruining the evening?"

"Both but he started it."

"He started it? What are you six?"

"No, despite my actions tonight. I'm sorry I ruined the evening but I'm sorrier that I've upset you. That was never my intention."

"It may not have been but really Andy I'm not the one you should be apologising to" Sharon stated sternly. "It's Christmas! Does no one have a sense of occasion but me? One night? We couldn't have one night? One night where you both behaved yourselves and acted like the adults your birth certificates suggest you are?" Sharon still couldn't believe the way the evening had ended. She was having a lovely time with Patrice but those idiots had to get each other riled up and see who could get the other into the most trouble. It was the sort of behaviour that she expected from school children, not two men who were eligible for retirement but that was probably the reason why she loved the pair of them so much. Sharon continued to glare at Andy, his discomfort evident as he fidgeted.

"It would seem not. Do you practice that stare in the mirror?" Andy paused waiting for Sharon to respond but nothing was forthcoming. "It's really good. Do you have any idea how frightening it is? Queen of the Interview Room." With his complete lack of experience in apologising now clear and his smile and multiple tries of 'I'm sorry' not working, Andy had only one option left, his smoulder. Sharon had already proven that she was defenceless against it and if anything was going to soften her heart to him and get him out of the hole he had dug for himself, that would be it. He smiled at her which quickly turned into a smouldering look that would leave 80% of the world's population leaping into his arms. Sadly Sharon was currently one of the 20% and didn't so much as blink at him. "Wow, you really are pissed. Look Sharon I am really sorry. I'll apologise to Patrice..."

"And?"

"And I'll apologise to Provenza tomorrow as well but he gave as good as he got and I'm sorry but it's how we are. We argue, we tell dirt to get each other in trouble and swap stories, not all of them good." Andy's face dropped as he prepared to pour his heart out. He suddenly began to worry that he had misunderstood why Sharon was so angry. He had assumed that it was because he'd had an argument and ruined the evening. He began to worry she was angry because of all the stories Provenza had told about him. Listening to Provenza you would think that Andy Flynn was a vile, womanising dirt bag who couldn't stay faithful if his life depended on it. In some part that was true but Andy liked to believe he wasn't that person anymore and hadn't been for a number of years. Throughout the evening the reason that he had been so quiet was because he was worried this would happen. That he would say something that would set Provenza off and the cat would be out of the bag. Even their frequent discussions in the build up and use of a safe word did nothing. They'd tried to prepare themselves so it didn't happen but they'd let it happen anyway. "I'm sorry that you perhaps heard things about me and my history that you rather you hadn't. I can't change that now, I can only apologise for it. I've spent the better part of my life ashamed of my past but if I've learned anything it's that I can't change it, I can only change how I behave in the future and the kind of man I am moving forward." As he finished Andy looked to his feet and for the first time he looked small. He looked defeated. He looked adorable.

Sharon suddenly felt awful. She had given Andy the completely wrong impression and needed to sort it out quickly. "Oh Andy come here" she said holding her arms and her legs open for him. Andy didn't need to be told twice. He immediately smiled and was in her arms, pressed up against her in the space she had created with his face buried in her hair in a flash. They held each other tightly for a moment, savouring the warmth and feel of each other. Eventually Sharon ran her legs around the back of his knees, holding him in place and letting him know he wasn't going anywhere. "For an intelligent man you really can be quite dense at times." Sharon kissed him on the side of his head as she continued to squeeze him tightly. "I'm not upset about that! I don't care about your past because it is exactly that, your past. I care that you along with your partner in crime ruined a perfectly pleasant evening."

Andy pulled back slightly so he could see her face. "Really?"

"I'm not an idiot. I know you have a past and guess what, so do I." Andy smiled as he looked at her a little surprised. Andy had assumed that there were other men between him and Jack but they'd never discussed it and if he was honest he didn't intend to. Andy was firmly of the opinion that you don't ask ladies questions like that, in fact it had been drummed into him by his Grandfather (who often told him 'Boy there are three questions you never ask your female. One: How old are you? Two: How many men have you experienced intercourse with? And three: Was it good for you too?), and Sharon was most definitely a lady. However in light of another conversation they'd had a couple of years ago, the idea of Sharon with a past since Jack was a surprise and intriguing to him. "What?" Sharon asked as she registered his surprise. "Andy I haven't been cloistered for the last two decades since Jack left me despite what people may have thought while I was working at IA."

"I vividly remember you telling me before Nicole's wedding that it wasn't a date because you were a married woman" Andy pointed out while he laced his fingers together behind her back.

Sharon moved her hands from Andy's back to his neck. "And I was and it wasn't. But that doesn't mean I didn't date during that period."

"Then why..."

"That was just to make sure you were put in your place and didn't cross the line. You see I have a rule that I never date a subordinate" Sharon said before she smiled devilishly and brought his lips down to meet hers. It was anything but a chaste kiss as she sought to expel his upset and worry through her lips.

"Oh really?" Andy smirked after they pulled apart.

"Yes. A steadfast rule. Never to be broken."

"I see." Andy pushed their lips together again, making a point as he kissed her with fervour, his tongue leading hers on a merry dance as their bodies pressed together. "And how's that working for you?"

"I'm still at the trial and error phase of testing" Sharon confirmed.

"Interesting. And how is 'testing' going?"

"Unbelievably well" Sharon laughed before kissing him again, their lips locking as the tension from the last couple of hours lifted from Andy's shoulders and evaporated into the night's sky.

"I love you" he said as their lips came apart.

"And I love you which means I don't care what happened before that dinner at Serve" she said as her hands returned to his back and she rubbed it to continue to reassure him. "As long as these things haven't taken place in the last five months and since it doesn't look like you've been robbed recently then it's nothing whatsoever to do with me or us."

Andy's smile grew with relief. "I'm so glad to hear you say that but just for the record, I want you to know that Andy, Womanising Andy, he's dead."

"Really?" Sharon laughed.

"Dead as a door nail. Tag on his toe. Drawer closed. Nothing to see here."

Sharon's eyes sparkled. "Did he freeze to death naked on a balcony?" In truth Sharon hadn't been able to get the image of a starkers Andy trapped on a balcony out of her mind since the moment Provenza had brought it up. She actually missed the next few exchanged of their argument it distracted her so much. She knew Andy was an idiot when it came to women (he did lie to his daughter and ex-wife about her fairly recently), she just didn't realise how much of an idiot he could actually be. Sharon could picture the look on his face as he realised that he was being robbed by a pretty face. She imagined him trying and failing to get his robber to stop with a smile and smoulder as he wondered what he could use on that balcony to hide his modesty as he waited to be rescued.

"No. I killed him" Andy said sheepishly.

"I see. Did you bury him next to Nervous Andy?"

"Right in the yard by the rhododendron."

"You don't have a rhododendron."

"You don't think I'm stupid enough to bury them in my own yard do you? My girlfriend is a badass police Captain. She'd sniff them out right away. I bury all my bodies in Provenza's yard so if I go down I can at least take him with me." Andy's smile faded before he kissed her slowly and gently on the lips. "Honestly Sharon I'm not that person anymore, really I'm not" he said honestly.

"I know you're not. Andy I wouldn't be here if I didn't trust you." Andy's face read surprise but Sharon meant every word. She went into their relationship with her eyes wide open. The truth was she was dealing with the legacy of Jack's constant cheating but had been determined to not let him ruin the end of her life like he'd ruined so much of the beginning. That meant that if her relationship with Andy was going to work she had to ignore what he had done in the past and trust him implicitly from the very beginning and although it was difficult that's what she was determined to do regardless. Sharon had once told Brenda in relation to Chief Pope that 'Good relationships sometimes depend on what you're willing to overlook' and when it came to Andy she was willing to overlook a lot because she loved him and therefore he had her trust.

"Really?"

"Really. That doesn't mean you being an idiot doesn't worry me sometimes but I trust you Andy and I hope I always will." She kissed him again before running her hand down the side of his face. "Look I knew what I was letting myself in for the moment I agreed to dinner after you used the word 'romantic.'"

"What does that mean?" Andy asked confused.

"Despite only telling two people we were dating I had half the building warning me off you within the first two weeks" Sharon explained.

Before that evening Sharon had been more than aware of Andy's reputation but didn't know any of the specifics and frankly didn't want to. As she got to know him as her friend and then her boyfriend she feared knowing all of the sordid details of his numerous indiscretions with members of the opposite sex may cloud her judgement and effect how she saw him and ultimately how she felt about him. Now that she was in love with him and was fairly certain he was in fact the love of her life she didn't much care what he'd been up to in the past just as long as he didn't repeat it. Still his reputation was always lingering in the back of her mind.

When Sharon thought of Andy she was reminded of a song she once heard on the radio where the protagonist kept repeating 'I get all the girls, I get all the girls.' Sharon had known Andy, albeit not very well, for just over twenty years but had been aware of him within the LAPD for a little over that. Twenty plus years ago she could tell he probably had a reputation just by looking at him, he just seemed like the type. The way he dressed. The way he spoke. His eyes. His smile, oh boy his smile. Sharon was admittedly more than a tad biased but she thought her Andy Flynn, the Andy in her arms in his kitchen in 2015 was the handsomest man she'd ever met in her life. However the Andy Flynn she first met in 1989 when he was forty and she'd just turned thirty-eight was without a doubt panty wettingly, groin grindingly fab despite the fact that he was quite clearly a humongous asshole. He was…he was…well he was just gorgeous. He was blatant sex on legs plain and simple.

The first time they had clapped eyes on each other Sharon was experiencing her first day at IA. As she walked down a ground floor corridor, scurrying to an interview she wanted to ensure she was early for she dropped a pen. As she stooped to retrieve it she was nearly knocked off her feet by a Detective Sergeant who had brushed past her face with his crotch. When Sharon stood up and saw him for the first time (his face rather than his crotch as was her first image of him) he literally took her breath away and she was forced to turn the plain wedding band on her finger round and round a couple of times to remind herself of the vows she had taken and she at least took seriously. Andy claimed in the letter he wrote at the hospital that he felt the same way. He'd said when he first saw her he stopped breathing. She hadn't questioned this version of events because it wasn't a line Andy was using to pick her up, he wrote it in a love letter when he thought he might die. Sharon believed him instantly because she did recall him staring at her for a brief moment without saying a word when she stood up and straightened her skirt. Then of course he spoke, telling her she was wearing a beautiful blouse before suggesting that it would look better on his bedroom floor and then it didn't matter how gorgeous he was, he was a giant asshole. In hindsight Sharon realised that it was probably the booze talking. Twenty six years ago he wasn't even close to contemplating getting sober. Still despite the fact that he was a drunken asshole (and Sharon already had one of those periodically popping in and out of her life and causing chaos so really didn't need another one) she still couldn't help but think about how gorgeous he was every time she saw him. He was so beautiful Sharon knew he probably didn't have to even open his mouth to have a line of women falling at his feet. He probably didn't even need the famous 'Intrigue' system that Julio was so enamoured with either. Deep down she wondered if that's why she made him work so hard for her because he'd had it so unbelievably easy in the past, she didn't want to be like all the others who just threw themselves at him.

Contrary to popular opinion she knew exactly what she was doing when she started dating Andy and she knew people would think she was crazy but she didn't care because the Andy she knew was so different to the one they used to know and indeed the one she used to know. Case in point Sharon was rather alarmed to be cornered in the bathroom a week after she started dating Andy by a Lieutenant from Narcotics, Valerie Jones who revealed that she had also 'dabbled' with Andy in the past. Lieutenant Jones rather bluntly told Sharon that Andy was 'going to break your heart' but again she felt she knew a different Andy to the one that she rather graphically described 'making the naked pretzel' with on a table in an interview room twenty years ago (shortly before he got sober). That behaviour was so unlike Andy, her Andy that she chose to ignore her advice plus Valerie Jones sounded a bit like a deflating balloon when she spoke and often smelt faintly of cheese so Sharon could fully understand why she got no long term commitment from the man in question. Sharon appreciated the concern, especially when it came from the likes of Chief Taylor who only had her best interests at heart, but she was a grown woman and she knew what she was doing. She had seen for herself how Andy had changed over the years, making him more and more attractive by the day as he morphed into the man she fell in love with and if she was making a mistake, so be it. It was better to attempt to spend the rest of her life happy than be scared off by the cautionary tales of others and spend the rest of her life alone.

Andy looked at her puzzled. "Warning you off me? What? Why?" he asked sounding offended that outside forces would dare try to end his relationship when he was so adept at such things himself.

Sharon moved her hands back to his neck in preparation to bring his lips towards hers once again. "You're not to be trusted apparently. You're a bit of a bad boy with a reputation and you were going to lead me astray."

"You like that I'm a bad boy" Andy said with a smoulder as he captured her lips once more in a long and passionate embrace.

"Yes I do actually" Sharon replied honestly as she crashed their lips together. She wouldn't lie, being someone who was somewhat obsessed with the rule book, she liked that she had her hands on someone who was anything but. If anything she found Andy being a troublemaker a bit of a turn on. "Wait 'are' or 'was'?" she asked quickly.

"Was. Definitely was."

"Good." Sharon met his lips once more, breaking apart only when she started to smile and laugh. "How many times have you been robbed by a date by the way and what is so frightening about Bars..." Sharon was immediately cut off as Andy's lips covered hers to stop her from finishing the question. It was a tactic that Sharon had use quite frequently with him, kissing him until he went weak at the knees to stop him from proving her wrong. As they broke apart Sharon laughed again. "You know if you're going to stop me from asking awkward questions with a kiss expect me to do it a lot more often" Sharon stated, paraphrasing something Andy said to her on his couch just a few days before. "At least I now know what those matching scars are on your leg and your….." Again Sharon was cut off by Andy's lips meeting hers.

"Let's not go there."

"When was this 'bomb threat' exactly?" Sharon questioned.

"I don't know. 2005 or 2006 maybe. Why?"

Sharon nodded. "I thought so. I'd just finished working out in the gym. I was forced to stand outside in just a towel, with a very stiff breeze and most of the LAPD staring at me."

"That's not true. There's no way I wouldn't have noticed these legs sticking out of a towel no matter how distracted I was at the time" Andy said as his right hand moved to run from her ankle to her knee as her legs remained wrapped around him.

"Actually I remember seeing you looking shifty and covering for whatever it was that you were doing...that I really don't need to hear about now" Sharon said quickly. She'd heard more than enough tales from the past in the last few hours without digging up any more dirt.

"Agreed." Andy quickly planted his lips on Sharon's before he grinned and held her even tighter. "So is there any part of this 'past' you'd like to share with me?"

"Oh I think its best you forget all about that, for your sake."

"That doesn't seem exactly fair. You now know everything there is to know about me."

"From my experience men don't like it when you mention former lovers. You'd all rather pretend you were the only man we've ever slept with and any children we've had came floating down the river in little wicker baskets" Sharon quite rightly pointed out. Andy wasn't a jealous man by any stretch of the imagination but he didn't want to think of Jack or anyone else for that matter laying a finger on his Sharon.

"You mean that's not how it happened?" Andy joked.

"With the exception of Rusty oddly enough no. Would you mind explaining why you were screaming 'Banana!' at the top of your lungs?" Sharon asked changing the subject.

"It's a long story which I'll tell you all about later if I'm lucky enough to share a bed with you tonight." He pushed their lips together once more. "I'm sorry, truly sorry."

Sharon hugged him tighter and rested her chin on his shoulder. "I know. But I'm still mad at you" she confirmed.

"That's fine" Andy accepted as he buried his face in her hair. "I deserve it. And just to prove how sorry I am I'll let you beat me senseless later."

"Count on it" Sharon said in a whisper straight into his ear before she pulled back to look him in the eyes. "Don't think your behaviour tonight is going to stop us from going out with them again. Only next time you actually behave yourself. Both of you."

"Are you going to have this same talk with Provenza?"

"I think Patrice has more than got that covered." Sharon's eyes sparkled.

Meanwhile across town a very similar conversation was taking place. The moment Sharon and Andy climbed into his car Provenza went into full blown grovelling mode. Like how Sharon reacted to Andy, Patrice was mad at him for causing a scene with a guest invited into their home but not what was said about him. Provenza had been married five times, there was no escaping from that or hiding from it so Patrice had been waiting to hear all of the stories which made her fiancé the man he is for a long time. Still, like Andy, he had ruined the evening so Patrice was going to make sure he knew he was in the doghouse. As she busied herself cleaning up the glasses and plates and washing up in complete silence, Provenza followed her around like a little lost puppy apologising. Patrice however managed to avoid crumbling a little longer than Sharon did with Provenza fetching a pillow and a blanket to sleep on the couch before she stuck her head into the living room and said 'Louie, get your backside in this bed.'

Back in Andy's kitchen they remained wrapped in each other's arms as Sharon sat on the counter. "What were you and Patrice laughing about in the yard?" Andy asked.

"That's for us to know and you and your little friend to worry about" Sharon said with a twinkle in her eyes. Patrice hadn't actually told her anything about her second in command. Sharon was the one that made most of the confessions but still, neither of her Lieutenants needed to know that just yet.

"Oh he went well past worry tonight. He got all anxious about his Captain knowing his deepest darkest secrets. Secrets that if you do know, really don't need to be shared with me." Andy paused for a moment as he just stared into Sharon's eyes. "Still love me?" he asked with a grin.

"Yes and you're very lucky I do."

"Don't I know it. I don't know what I did to deserve you."

"Neither do I" Sharon joked.

Andy again grinned before he moved in close and planted another kiss on her lips. "You know the best part of a fight?"

"Enlighten me."

"The making up" Andy pointed out as his lips moved to Sharon's jaw, peppering it with kisses as he moved towards her ear.

"Really?" Sharon asked as her eyes closed briefly while Andy continued to brush his lips against her flesh.

"U huh." Andy moved down to her neck as his lips continued to travel south.

Sharon opened her eyes and tugged her lip into her mouth. "Well I've got news for you my beautiful boy. We haven't been fighting." Sharon placed her hands on Andy's shoulders and pushed him off her. Looking him squarely in the eyes she said "That was you and Lieutenant Provenza. So up and at em'. Off you go." Sharon smacked him on the backside. "Try not to wake me when you come home from your make up sex session with your friend."

"I think I'll pass" Andy said as Sharon laughed. "He's not as gentle as you are and he never shaves his legs. Would you like a coffee?"

"Please."

Andy planted one more kiss on her lips before they finally pulled apart. Sharon remained seated on the corner of the counter while Andy crossed the room and turned on the coffee maker. Sharon watched him as he filled it with water and added the coffee. "I wish you'd let me keep a bottle of wine for you in the fridge for when you come over" Andy said as he retrieved two cups from the cabinet above his head.

"The last thing I need right now is more wine and anyway I don't want you to keep a bottle of wine for me." Back when they were just friends and Sharon would go to Andy's house for dinner or to watch football she flat out refused to allow him to keep a bottle of wine for her. Now that they were together her stance had not altered at all. In all honesty she didn't like drinking in front of him and never had done but sometimes Andy would insist and order her a glass or pour one for her himself.

"I wouldn't drink it."

"I know you wouldn't but still, I don't want to put you in that position just for me. It must be hard enough without temptation being left right under your nose."

"You know there are ways around it" Andy pointed out as he crossed the floor back to Sharon and once again ran his arms around her waist.

"Really? How so?"

"Well we could just move in together and then both I and a bottle of wine would always be on hand to you anytime the mood took you."

"Yes because I desperately need one just to put up with the other" Sharon joked. Suddenly her face dropped as she prepared to broach this suddenly serious switch in the conversation. She ran her hands up his leather jacket and held onto the collar making sure he couldn't run anywhere. "Listen Andy…."

Andy was quick to stop her from going any further. "I know, I know. Slow down. You're not even close to being there yet. Forget I mentioned it" he said quickly as his eyes dropped to the floor.

"I'm sorry. I will get there just not yet." Sharon placed her hand under his chin and lifted his face to look him in the eyes. "You know I love you."

"I know and I love you too. I'm sorry I'm impatient."

"Oh Andy you're not impatient. You're the most patient man I've ever met. You must be to put up with me. I just don't want to rush into this."

"Sharon no one could accuse you of rushing into anything. Ever! You over think practically everything to make sure you make the right decision so the fact with all that in mind you've chosen me makes me feel all the more special." Andy pushed a lose strand of hair off her face before joining their lips together.

"I don't mean to leave you dangling. But it's not just me. I'm sorry but I come as a package deal with a teenager who has issues with change and he definitely needs more time. We'll get there, I promise but I, but we just need more time."

"I understand" Andy said quietly. He could kick himself for having brought it up as he knew what Sharon's response would be but simply couldn't help himself. He loved her and he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her and couldn't wait for that to begin. "I'll wait for you, both of you. It's just I look at Provenza and Patrice and they're engaged…what? Less than a year after they met and we've known each other since forever and we've only just…"

Sharon was quick to interrupt him by pressing her lips to his while her arms wrapped back around him. She knew exactly what he was going to say and if she was honest she felt a little bad about it but in her mind it simply couldn't be helped. Spending the evening with Provenza and Patrice had really brought it home for Andy, the differences in their respective relationships. Provenza and Patrice had met and gone out on their first date in just over 24 hours. In comparison Andy and Sharon had known each other for just over two decades. Within that time they had been adversaries for three years, colleagues for four years, friends for two years and now dating for five months. Provenza and Patrice had been arranging weekends away after just a month together. Andy and Sharon went to the movies. Lots and lots of movies. Provenza and Patrice moved in together after eight months and got engaged four months later. It had taken Andy five months to see Sharon naked. In relation to the rest of the world their relationship wasn't progressing that slowly, but in comparison to Provenza and Patrice it was like they were travelling at a snail's pace. Andy wasn't complaining he really wasn't but when he was faced with what his friend had he couldn't help but feel envious at the pace they were able to go. Yet he fully understood and accepted Sharon's request to take things slowly. Sharon was very deliberate with everything she did. Every decision required great thought. He knew that going in so it was no real surprise when she applied it to their relationship. He actually loved her all the more for it. It was who she was after all. She was cautious. She did take her time and if he truly loved her which he did then he had to love that part of her as well. And yet he couldn't help but feel the opposite. He could have died a month ago. That changes a person. What were they waiting for? Then there was the work side of things. The more he thought about it the more he realised Sharon was right, they had to take things slowly to ensure it was possible to date and work together. If it didn't work out he didn't know what he'd do. Before Sharon work was all he had. With Sharon he could contemplate a life of lazy afternoons after retirement but if they didn't work as a couple and it became awkward at work so he was almost forced into retirement, what would he do for the rest of his life without work or Sharon? Drink?

As they broke apart Sharon smiled at him. "I know. It will happen I promise but for now there are certain advantages to us not living together."

"Oh yeah? Such as?"

"Such as there is zero chance of Rusty walking in here right now" Sharon said as she removed her glasses and pushed them down the kitchen counter and out of the way.

Andy looked at her slightly perplexed for a moment. "And why would that matter?"

Sharon smiled as she bit her lip. She looked at the floor briefly before meeting his eyes. "Because I'm not wearing any underwear."

Andy's eyes widened. "Excuse me?" he said in a state of shock as he began to frantically tug on his ear.

"You heard me" Sharon said confidently. She laughed as Andy looked completely dumbfounded. "Andy it's not flattering to look so shocked." Sharon pressed her lips to his as he continued to stand there stunned with his mouth open like a goldfish.

Eventually Andy regained control of his mouth and managed to force out some words of a fairly coherent nature. "You went commando to Provenza's house? For Christmas drinks?!"

As Sharon smiled and nodded at Andy a thousand and one thoughts flashed through his mind at the same time making him feel dizzy. He suddenly realised why she'd been acting so peculiar all night, why she was walking oddly, why she wouldn't stop yanking at the hem of her dress. But more importantly than that he was completely overwhelmed with shock. He'd never been shocked by a woman before with the exception of Mrs Williams who he once found in his bedroom going through his underwear one weekend when he came back inside from taking the garbage out. By now he thought he knew Sharon pretty well. What was clear from the outset was that she was incredibly careful with her actions, so straight laced. So by the book, so guarded. Since it had taken just over five months to get her into bed he never expected anything like this in his wildest dreams. It was so out of character from anything he had ever experienced from her, so unexpected he was equal parts shocked and turned on. Damn it if it wasn't the sexiest thing anyone had ever done for him.

As Sharon looked at Andy she could see the wheels turning in his mind as he processed what she had just told him. Once again he looked beyond adorable. Suddenly he spoke. "Oh my God I love you!"

As Andy wrapped his arms around Sharon and pressed himself against her in a passionate embrace on the kitchen counter there was one piece of vital information he didn't have. If Sharon was perfectly honest she hadn't intended to go to her second in command's house for Christmas drinks with him and his fiancée without any underwear on, it had happened purely by accident in so much as these things can happen by accident. As she was getting dressed for dinner that evening she had inexplicably forgotten where she would be spending the evening. Thinking purely about Andy and spending the night with him alone at his house she never gave drinks with Patrice and Provenza a second thought despite the fact she was really looking forward to it and that's when the idea hit her. It really wasn't like her at all and she'd never done it before, in fact it made her blush just thinking about it, but she thought to herself what if she went over there, to Andy's house minus her underwear. She could just picture the look on his face as she told him. Those beautiful brown eyes widening as he processed the information and pulled on his earlobe. He wouldn't expect it that's for certain and she was forever trying to prove to him (not that she really needed to, Andy was constantly surprised by her) that she could be wild and spontaneous or the Sharon Raydor equivalent of wild and spontaneous at any rate. Seconds later the idea was immediately dismissed out of hand as she reminded herself that she wasn't a teenager for the hundredth time that week. Being in your 60s with one failed marriage behind you tends to put the nut crackers on spur of the moment ideas such as discarding your underwear to turn your boyfriend on. Then just as quickly as she turned to leave the bathroom she changed her mind once again and after a quick shimmy down her legs and flick over her right shoulder, Sharon left her bedroom minus her panties and instead wearing the biggest of filthy smiles.

With Rusty out for the evening already on his first date with Gus (Sharon had told Patrice and Provenza the slightly better version of events for Rusty's sake. Rusty was so nervous the night before after they arrived home from the Christmas party it was unclear whether he was going to cry or wet himself and actually arrived at the restaurant two hours before they agreed to meet), Sharon opened her front door and greeted Andy with her horrific 'sex eyes' and silence. After she registered what he was wearing and how he was smouldering it was quickly followed by a kiss that showed her intentions for the evening and that left him completely speechless and more than a tad weak at the knees. Ten minutes later the tables were turned and Sharon became speechless and mortified beyond all belief when Andy started driving in the opposite direction than she expected.

"Is the freeway blocked?"

"Nope."

"Then where are we going?" she asked slightly perplexed but hoping to hide it.

"Provenza's. Remember? We're going for drinks."

Sharon went as white as a sheet as the horror struck. She would have to spend the entire evening with her Lieutenant and his fiancée with no underwear on. There are worse things in the world that could happen to a person but at that moment in time, Sharon couldn't think of one. When they arrived outside of Provenza's house and Sharon climbed out of the car like someone had superglued her knees together Andy had noticed immediately and asked what was wrong. She briefly thought about telling him the truth just to see the look on his face but she knew Andy too well. Andy was a gentleman, he was chivalrous and more than touch attentive to her in (thankfully) all aspects of their relationship but he was also a guy, a real guy and she knew he'd knock his cranberry and soda back in one, ice and swizzle stick and all, and be dragging her back to his place like a sex obsessed cave man within minutes of arriving and as much as she was fully on board with that suggestion (it was basically her intention with her wardrobe choice or lack thereof to begin with) it wasn't the purpose of the evening. The purpose of the evening was to have the first (of what would fingers crossed presumably be many although that seemed a little unlikely after the events of the evening) couples evening with some very close friends with or without underwear (preferably with on all future outings).

Throughout the evening it was the only thing Sharon could think about as she had visions of something like a scene from Basic Instinct accidentally playing out in front of Lieutenant Provenza if she became too relaxed. Sharon knew she'd frightened everyone when her cell phone hit the floor and as Provenza stooped to retrieve it her cry of 'NO!' almost shattered the windows but rather they think her strange than discover the truth. As she sat there she couldn't help but envision Provenza dropping something of his own and crouching down to pick it up. His eyes bulging as he caught sight of something completely unexpected and he became unable to ever look her in the eye again and vice versa or worse, his eyes bulging as he grabbed hold of his chest and collapsed on the floor from the shock. The house being lit up by the flashing red and blue lights from the paramedics as he was wheeled away into the ambulance. His last words to Patrice about what he'd seen, what caused him to have a heart attack as he clutched his chest one final time and breathed his last breath. Word quickly spreading around the whole of the LAPD about what finally killed the formidable Lieutenant Louie Provenza.

As Sharon moved about the house she had all the attributes of a mermaid as she kept her knees together in a fashion that her mother would have been proud of as no one failed to notice how oddly she was behaving. If she was honest she had no idea why she was walking with her knees so close together. No one could see that she was going commando but Sharon was so mortified that all rational thought went straight out of the window as she did everything she could to make sure no one discovered the truth. She'd picked that sundress to wear specifically because Andy loved her in it. The only problem was every tiny puff of air or sudden movement had the bottom playfully swishing around and potentially revealing more than it should. She was one gust of wind away from giving everyone more of a show that Marilyn Monroe in The Seven Year Itch. As the evening progressed she became convinced that her dress kept riding up on her like the curtain on an opening night on Broadway. It almost bordered on obsessive compulsive disorder as she tugged the hem of if down every thirty seconds. Why oh why had she chosen a dress that only came to just above her knees? Why hadn't she picked something that covered her from head to toe? Why didn't she own a burka? Why did she think it was a good idea to leave the condo without her underwear on? Why? Why?! The one thing that her Grandmother had taught her above all else was not to leave the house unless you had matching underwear on in case you get run over and need to go to the hospital and yet here she was leaving the house without any on at all. The light and pleasant LA breeze had gone places it never had done before. The decision had been made, Sharon was never leaving the house without underwear again, in fact it was highly likely she'd wear an additional pair of panties just to make certain.

Choosing to confide in Patrice in the privacy of the yard as they attempted to bond, Sharon began to relax slightly following her instant laughter at her whispered revelation but didn't fully feel the weight leaving her shoulders until they walked out of the Provenza household and she successfully won the battle to climb back into the car without flashing her 'lady garden' (as Gavin had delightfully described it when he encouraged her to wax everything to within an inch of its life before her first date with Andy) to half the neighbourhood.

What was a spur of the moment and completely uncharacteristic and spontaneous act for her boyfriend's sole benefit resulted in anything but a relaxing and stress free evening for Sharon but in that exact moment, in Andy's kitchen, with their lips pressed together and Sharon's legs wrapped around his waist, Andy didn't need to know that.

As their lips came apart for the first time primarily so that Andy could make a beeline for Sharon's neck his right hand started to slowly make its way from her knee and up her leg on a mission to discover if she was really telling the truth or not. Rightly or wrongly it was at that moment that Sharon chose to make her second confession of the night. Breathlessly in his ear she whispered "By the way Andy, I took your coffee."