Chapter Eleven
Said Too Much
"Remy!" a voice yelled as I slowly regain consciousness, "Remy...oh God, Yves get over here!" It was Emile. Yves rushed over and undid the bonds, "Come on" he said as he picked me up, "let's get you out of here." Emile and Yves each took an arm and dragged me out of the brothel, through the marketplace and into the lower district of the city.
Coming up to an old shack, they sat me down in small bed in one of the back rooms. I slowly began to regain my senses; I could make out Emile, "Emile?" I said, "What's going on, where I am?" Emile smiled gingerly, "Does it matter? You're safe now" he patted my arm, it was extremely tender from the whip, "What happened?" he asked, "Why were you there?" I shook my head as the pieces slowly came together, I should've walked away when I had the chance I should've left her alone in the room to begin with.
Yves stepped out from the shadows, "Did you love her?" he asked. I turned towards him, "You-you tried to kill me!" I cried, "You were the one who almost drowned Emile weren't you?" Yves became uneasy, "What are you talking about?" he said as he looked around aimlessly, obviously avoiding the question. I quickly turned towards Emile, "Remember when Yves threw you in?" He nodded, "Yves brought a rock down on your tail." Emile looked down and noticed that his tail was missing, "Well what do you know? Hey Yves look at that, no tail." I rolled my eyes, "Idiot! Yves tried to kill us!" I turned back on Yves, "Now you expect me to believe that you were trying to save me? In what sick, twisted world is dropping a brick on someone's head that could possibly kill ever consider saving their lives?"
Emile laid me back down on the bed and put a warm rag to my head, "Remy" he said firmly, "you're acting delusional. Just try and rest, you've been through a lot." I nodded and tried to breathe normally, but Yves kept staring at me, almost menacingly. I didn't trust this guy one bit. But then I didn't care, for I realized something. She was dead and although she successfully took advantage of me, stepped on my heart, ate it and then raped me, I still couldn't believe that all of this happened within one day. I was in love and out of love in less than six hours, I was alone again and I began to feel as if I would always be alone. Yves continued to stare.
Emile sat on the bed and spoke, "Maybe you should just, I don't know..." Emile trailed off; he didn't want to finish his sentence. "Give up" Yves added, "Its dangerous Remy. This game of love, people can get hurt and not just the people involved but the people you care about." I started to protest, but instead a violent coughing fit came about, rendering me speechless. I lay back down on the bed and looked Yves, "What is your deal anyway? You try to kill me and then save me?"I asked. Yves sighed, "It's complicated Remy. I can't tell you everything but know that I'm on your side. Olivia, the girl you were with, was part of an organization." I blinked, in surprise of her name and the new information, "What organization?" I asked. Yves stopped and sighed, "I've already said too much" he replied, as he made his way towards the door, "Promise me one thing Remy. Never come back here."
I nodded in agreement and Yves left. Emile stayed with me in that shack until the next morning, January 4th, and we headed up to the surface. I promised myself that I would never go back to the City of Rats and to this day I never have.
Two Months Later
It's becoming more and more difficult with each passing day. My dreams are haunted by Olivia, those eyes, how normal she looked, and then the dark cold day of when my love for her died. The fact that I am now suffering from hallucinations isn't helping much either, but I still find reasons to get up in the morning. One of those reasons is Emile.
Emile is becoming more and more dependent on me. He decided to move in to my apartment so he could take care of me, but really it was the other way around. I couldn't have him in my life anymore, so after a month of him living with me, I kicked him out. I told him that he could come back when he learned to survive and do things on his own; I doubt that day will come.
Most days I spend at the restaurant, even after hours. Colette hasn't been to work in more than three weeks, same with Linguini. I understand that their expecting a kid any day now, but I need at least one of them, preferably Linguini, to show up. If this keeps up for much longer I'm going to fire both of them. I hate to do it, but eventually I won't have a choice, the restaurant is suffering enough as it is, I don't need any more problems.
As for my social and romantic life, it's nonexistent. I've given up hope of ever finding anyone; I have become extremely skeptical and distrustful of people, in short, my father.
Sitting in the restaurant I noticed how empty the place looked. There hadn't been much in the way of business and it was in the middle of spring, which is usually a busy time for me. Now everything was quiet. The silence was almost maddening.
Linguini sat at a table across from Colette, who was showing more and more signs of her intimate pregnancy. "Linguini" Colette said lovingly, "do you think you can have Remy make a-" Linguini jumped up before Colette finished her sentence and turned towards me, "Chef!" he yelled. Rolling my eyes, I walked over, "Yes" I stated sarcastically and with absolutely no enthusiasm, for they had been asking a lot of me lately, I barely slept anymore. "Be at her every beck and call!" Linguini demanded as he pointed at Colette, who only shrugged her shoulders slightly and smiled meekly with embarrassment as if to say, 'It's really no big deal'. I smiled warmly and pulled out a small yellow notebook, ready to take her order.
"Actually Monsieur" Colette began, "I'm not hungry." I put the notebook away quickly and stared her down, "Then why bother calling me?" I asked rather rudely, "I was busy going over the books. Now I have to start all over." Colette lifted her hand, stopping me, "I just wanted to talk" she said, her voice hurt but her face stern and serious. I was being an asshole and I knew it, but personally I didn't care. "In case you didn't know" I continued, keeping my off putting tone, "this place is going down. At this rate, we'll be out of business in less than a month." Colette raised her eyebrows, "What are you saying?" she asked. I sighed and got on the table, this was meant to be face to face. "I'm saying that I need my workers back" I answered, "I can't run this place on my own and you're the only ones left." I hesitated to finish, for I knew that this would be destroying my friendship with both of them, the only humans who ever cared for me, but it had to be done. "And I know that you're having a baby and you can't come into work, so- I'm firing the both of you." Linguini and Colette both had their mouths agape, the y couldn't believe that this was happening, "Y-y-you can't do that!" Linguini cried, "We have bills to pay!" I had had enough of Linguini's constant whining, "Why don't you grow a pair Linguini?" I snapped, "Because you must have lost your balls when you decided to knock up a whore like Colette." I immediately stopped, I should've stopped talking long before that, but I didn't, now I said too much and I couldn't take it back. So I made it worse, "Also are you even sure that the kid is yours Linguini? Think about it. What are the chances of you ever, ever in a million having sex? Better yet, what are the chances of Colette letting you have sex with her...None!"
Now I said too much. As soon as I calmed down I turned back towards Colette, trying to apologize. I was met with a justified and much deserved slap to the face. It was a hard slap to a human, but to me, it was like she was sending me to Kingdom Come on a speeding train with a Golden Ticket. That's how close she was to breaking my neck. The slap was hard enough to send up flying off the table and landing on the floor with a broken hand.
Colette stood up and Linguini led her towards the door. Before he left, Linguini turned around and yelled across the room, "You ever say that again I'll kill you" he screamed, "in fact, if I even see you, I'm coming over and beating the shit out of you!" Message received. Standing up, now officially alone in the restaurant, I walked back over to the table I was sitting at and continued punching the numbers.
I stayed up late in the night going over everything. The restaurant was so deep in the hole that even with a full kitchen staff, it would be impossible to recuperate any kind of profit. It was no longer about doing what I love, I wasn't a chef of talent and skill, I was a chef of business. Everything I did for the next three days was all in the name of keeping the restaurant. It was miserable. I had become Skinner, the one man out a dozen other humans, who had tried to kill me and came close to succeeded.
On the fourth day after I fired Linguini and Colette, the bank foreclosed the restaurant, in fact, the building was condemned for demolition within the week. I had only been a chef for nine months, not even a year, and it was already over. I had initially expected that I would at least get five years under my belt before anything like this happened, at which I would sell the building and start fresh. Now I had nothing. The only thing I had was my apartment, something that changed very quickly, for the bank also evicted me from the complex the very same morning they closed the restaurant.
My life was over. If I couldn't cook I saw no reason for living. Walking over to the nearest bridge, I was prepared to end it. I would give no explanation, the restaurant's foreclosure and eviction would be good enough. Just as I was about to jump, a voice stopped me, "Wait stop!" it was a voice I hadn't heard in a long time, turning around I was face to face with Anton Ego.
Anton walked over, breathing heavily, "What are you doing?" I rolled my eyes, "What does it look like I'm doing?" I answered. Anton was the only human that I trusted enough with my private life and my ability to speak that is until Linguini and Colette were added to the list. "Killing yourself isn't the answer" Anton continued, "There's too much that life has to offer Remy, too much, for you to do something as stupid as that!" I sighed, what was the point? "I lost the restaurant Anton" I began, "I can't cook. So why bother?" Anton laughed, "So that's a reason to kill yourself? What about your brother?" I rolled my eyes, everyone was always using Emile against me, as if he were the sole reason I did anything in my life. "We're not on speaking terms" I answered, "Well what about Linguini and Colette? Surely they will miss you." I laughed, remembering the conversation that morning, "No. At this point it'll be a blessing to them." Anton raised his eyebrows in confusion, "I might have told Linguini that he wasn't a man, Colette was a whore and possibly have hinted that their kid may not be Linguini's." Anton sighed, "Anything else?" he asked. I sighed deeply, "I also fired them."
At this Anton almost lost it, as if me firing Linguini and Colette had been the worst thing that I could've done. I insulted Linguini's manhood, insulted Colette and her unborn kid and me firing them was the worst thing to Anton Ego. "What!" he screamed, almost making my deaf in the right ear, "you fired them? Why did you do that?" I huffed, "The restaurant demanded it. I demanded it. Anton, I didn't do something we were sunk! I kept the restaurant going for two more days before it closed. That's two more days of business. Not much business mind you, but two more days of business, two days worth of more money than if I were to have kept Linguini and Colette and have the restaurant close that very day." Anton was close to slapping me in the face, which would've sent me into the river where I would've most certainly drowned or landed on a rock and snapped my neck in two.
"You're a fool Remy" Anton growled, "May God fine it in His heart to save your soul from damnation." Way to get all religious on me Anton. "I didn't have a choice Anton" I defended, "it was either them or the restaurant." Anton shook his head, "You would sell out your friends to keep your business?" Here we go, using food as a labor of love against me. "It's not that simple anymore" I continued, "I had to make sacrifices. I'll pay for them, with my life if necessary, but right now I'll just have to live with that." Anton nodded, obviously having nothing else to say. "Go ahead" he said, "Kill yourself. You'd be doing the world a favor!" I stopped, having to do a double take to catch what he was saying, "What are you saying?" I asked. "I'm saying" Anton answered back immediately, "that you're insufferable! You think that you're alone because no one likes you; you think that your business failed because it was destined to! Your business failed because you have poor management skills and fired your workers, workers who respected and thought the world of you. But you're alone because you're an asshole!"
When Anton was done ranting he walked away, not caring if I jumped or not, I looked down at the water and suddenly became sick, the notion of suicide having no left my mind. Having nowhere to go, I made my way to Norte Dame, the one place in Paris that I never managed to visit. All that day as I sat on the steps of the massive church, I kept thinking about everything that Anton said and I realized that he was right. But the thing was, I didn't care, I was deluded actually liking the rat I had become. It would take a miracle to bring me back to my senses and the thing about miracles is that most of them come unexpectedly, when we don't want them and when we are in most in need of one.
