Author's note: Apologies for the long delay since the last chapter. I finally have my laptop back from the repair shop, and hopefully will be able to resume posting a chapter a week. elag
Chapter 11
Mr Gardiner's study was a utilitarian room, lined with shelves containing ledgers, registers and sample books. His desk was a perfect example of organised chaos - doubtless Mr Gardiner would be able to lay his hand on any particular document with precision, but to an observer it appeared an entirely random collection of papers. Luckily for present purposes, there was a pair of comfortable chairs arrayed before the fireplace which were unencumbered by the busy clutter that characterised the rest of the room. Mr Bennet waved Darcy into one of them, then poured two glasses of brandy before taking the second himself. Giving Darcy his glass, he raised a toast "to my remarkable daughters", which Darcy was only too happy to drink to.
"Thank you for agreeing to this meeting, sir," began Darcy, a little nervously, but he was cut short before he could make his request.
"Think nothing of it, Mr Darcy," replied his interlocutor dismissively. "I was eager for an opportunity to speak with you privately. Tell me, young man, how is it that my daughter Elizabeth, who last time we spoke had nothing good to say about you, brought you and your sister to this house at such a time? I understand from what your sister had to say that you have some history with that Wickham scoundrel, but I am astounded to think you have shared such matters with my daughter, or that she decided you should be privy to the near ruin of her own family. I did not make an issue of it in the other room, (particularly as it was clear your presence disconcerted Mr Wickham, and that was a satisfaction in itself after the last few days of enduring his company). I trust Elizabeth to have some good reason for sharing Lydia's circumstances with you and your sister. She is a sensible child, and would not put our family's reputation at risk. So I trusted you, and will trust you, to keep our confidence. But I am still perplexed. Why are you here, sir?"
Darcy thought carefully before answering. He swirled the liquor in his glass, watching the light of the fire reflected through the amber liquid, before raising his eyes to examine Mr Bennet directly. The older man was not someone Darcy had come to respect: he had stood by on several occasions when his daughters or his wife had made themselves ridiculous; he had allowed Mr Collins to importune and even propose to his favourite daughter before he bothered to put his foot down and discourage the man's attentions; his estate was adequately run, but in an old-fashioned way, with no attention to modern developments in farming and land management. No, Darcy had not had reason to think well of Mr Bennet in the past. But now he needed that man's approval for the most important thing in his life: he could not risk alienating Elizabeth's father. Taking a deep breath, he decided to start at the beginning.
"Mr Bennet, I am aware that I did not make a good impression when I came into Hertfordshire. I was fresh from the events involving my sister and Wickham, so was in a foul mood, but that is no excuse for the arrogance with which I treated the neighbourhood. I deeply regret the offence I caused, and quite understand why many would view me poorly. It may please you to know that I well and truly came a cropper as a result of that overweening pride. I was brought low when I learned in the plainest possible way that all my wealth and connections did not make me a prize - that a woman worthy of being pleased required different accomplishments in a gentleman. I took that lesson to heart, and have tried to become a better man."
Mr Bennet was all astonishment at this opening. He had expected condescension and disdain from one such as Darcy. Everything he had seen of the man in their prior acquaintance reinforced his initial impression that Darcy thought himself above his company and had looked on the Bennet family only to find fault. Yet here he was, admitting his error and claiming to be a reformed man. Mr Bennet had an inkling as to the source of the proud Mr Darcy's comeuppance, but thought he would have a little fun at the man's expense before allowing him to come to the point.
"Well, you have my sympathy, sir. It is never pleasant to have one's short-comings pointed out, particularly by a member of the gentle sex. Having observed her strength and outspokenness, I can only presume that it way Miss Darcy who took you to task over your behaviour. I must compliment her on her discernment, for you were indeed insufferably rude when we first knew you."
Darcy's eyes goggled a little at such bluntness, but then he reminded himself where Elizabeth had learned her frankness from. To Mr Bennet's surprise, a small smile graced his lips as he answered, "No, indeed. My sister is an admirable young lady, and has lately grown in confidence, it is true, but she has only ever seen the best in me. No, it was another young lady altogether who so thoroughly chastised me. Mr Bennet, I speak of your daughter, Miss Elizabeth. It is Miss Elizabeth Bennet who did me the great favour of listing my faults."
"A great favour, you call it! I dare say you are an unusual man to think so. Not many would relish such an event. But you astound me, Mr Darcy. You say it was my Lizzy who told you off. Well, I cannot imagine the circumstances in which that conversation might have occurred! Lizzy is a young woman of decided opinions, but I hope she has good enough manners to refrain from speaking so harshly to slight acquaintances. After all, she endured near a full week in the same house with you and those appalling Bingley sisters without being provoked to such language. What on earth did you do to inspire my Lizzy to attack you so?"
Darcy rolled his eyes, realising he would not escape this interview without completely humiliating himself, and said, "Three things, really. First, I hid my admiration for your daughter, leaving her with the impression that I meant that absurd insult that I uttered at the Meryton assembly - I am sure she has mentioned it to you?" At the older gentleman's nod, he continued, "Second, I was arrogant enough to think I could ascertain the true feelings of a lady I had barely spoken to: I advised my friend Bingley that I thought Miss Bennet to be indifferent to him. I have since become aware of how wrong I was, but at the time I thought I was saving a friend from a marriage of unequal affections. In doing so, I caused grief to Bingley, whose affections were most definitely engaged, and, as Miss Elizabeth told me, to Miss Bennet. I have since apologised for such officious interference in the affairs of others, but at the time, I not only rejoiced in my success, but I went so far as to boast of it to my cousin, who innocently told the tale to Miss Elizabeth, not realising that the lady in question was her sister."
"I can imagine Lizzy would not take such news kindly," said a thoughtful Mr Bennet, "but at least it seems your motives were good, even if your information was not. My eldest still suffers from your interference, sir."
At this Darcy blanched. "I have written to Bingley and asked him to reopen Netherfield. I intend to tell him of my mistake and beg his forgiveness, but want to do so in person, and not by letter. I will do so while we are in town. What might come of it, I cannot say. It may be that too much time has passed. But if he and Miss Bennet still feel as they did last winter, then perhaps this will give them an opportunity to overcome the impediments placed in their path by others. I apologise unreservedly to you, sir, as I have done to Miss Elizabeth, for my mistaken pride in thinking it was my place to be the judge of Miss Bennet's affections."
"Come, now," chided Mr Bennet, "do not be too hard on yourself. You acted in the service of a friend, after all. But you said three things?"
"Ah, yes … well …" Darcy took a swig of the brandy for courage and plowed on: "My third offence was the most spectacular. I proposed marriage to your daughter in the most insulting and condescending terms possible."
Mr Bennet was delighted to see that the proud Mr Darcy was blushing like a schoolboy at this admission. He took a long sip of his drink while he contemplated the astounding idea that his Elizabeth had won the heart of a man he had hitherto believed impervious to such an emotion. But then the import of what Darcy had said really sank in. With a start, Mr Bennet sat up straight in his chair and demanded, "Are you telling me you have entered into a secret engagement with my daughter, sir?"
Darcy laughed quietly, saying, "I have not, sir. Miss Elizabeth rejected my suit most vehemently. She did not spare me the full force of her scorn in explaining why I was not the sort of man she would consider as the companion of her future life. And while it stung at the time, on reflection I realised she was right to do so. I had not behaved as a gentleman ought. I had been vain and selfish. Indeed, can you imagine the extent of my folly: I had expected Miss Elizabeth to accept my suit for my wealth and position, without stopping to wonder whether she even liked me!"
Mr Bennet coughed before responding. He did not know whether to admit that he would have expected likewise (since his second daughter could not expect to ever receive a more prudentially favourable offer), to laugh at the image of Elizabeth's anger unleashed on the hapless suitor, or to worry at where this most unexpected conversation was leading. Why was Mr Darcy telling him all this? Eventually he mastered his voice and settled on teasing - his usual standby in times of uncertainty. "What shall it profit a man, if he gain the whole world, and suffer the loss of his heart?" he paraphrased, raising an eyebrow at Darcy in challenge.
To his surprise, Darcy was neither angry nor embarrassed to be so mocked. True, the tall gentleman did flinch slightly at the memory of how it felt to have lost both his heart and his hope of being reunited with it. Nevertheless, he looked steadily at Mr Bennet, smiled slightly, and explained the current state of matters between himself and Miss Elizabeth.
"Luckily for me, I face neither prospect, Mr Bennet. I am rich, but hardly so rich as to be in danger of gaining the whole world. I have a solid income derived from property and investments, a well-established family home and estate, a position of respect in my community and close family connections with nobility. However, I am at heart a gentleman farmer like yourself. As for my heart, I did indeed lose it, and thereby learnt some harsh but necessary lessons about myself.
"But then, against all hope and expectation, I was blessed by the opportunity to renew my acquaintance with Miss Elizabeth when she toured Derbyshire. She and I have spoken of our past differences. I have tried to show her how I have endeavoured to become a better man. And I have been honoured by her agreement to enter into a courtship, subject, of course, to your consent, sir."
At last, now that the moment called for him to speak, Mr Bennet found himself with nothing to say. The stress of the past few days of cajoling Wickham into waiting for the Gardiners' return, followed by the shock of Mr Darcy's revelations, was overwhelming. To play for time, he pressed Mr Darcy on the fact that he was seeking consent for a courtship rather than an engagement. "Am I to understand that you have proposed to my daughter, been roundly rejected, suffered all the pangs of heartache, only to be reunited with her, whereupon you found her more favourably inclined towards you, and now you seek a courtship? Are you no longer certain of your intentions, Mr Darcy? Do you perhaps plan to exact your revenge by working to engage her affections and then disappointing her hopes? Why, sir, are you not asking my permission to propose?"
This was one insult too many for Darcy. He had to rein in his temper, which flared at the suggestion that he might be playing with Elizabeth's affections. Not only did it question the deep affection he held for this man's daughter, but it challenged his honour as a gentleman. With icy calm, he placed his glass on the side table, and rose to his feet. He could no longer endure sitting before the fire as though they were two gentlemen at their club discussing the cricket. This was his Elizabeth's heart they were talking about!
"Mr Bennet," he said sharply, "I hope that was an attempt at humour, for if you seriously think I would treat any young lady in such a manner, you are quite mistaken, and if I thought you were in earnest, I would take the greatest offence."
Mr Bennet blanched a little, as he realised that he had pushed the great man too far. His courage rallied, however, and he answered with commendable sternness, "I hold my daughter's happiness very dear, Mr Darcy. I will not sit idly by and see her heart played with. I am glad to receive your assurances that your intentions are honourable, but you are still to explain why, having once proposed, you are now only seeking a courtship. Your sister certainly implied something more. How do you account for it, sir?"
"I would propose immediately, if I thought Miss Elizabeth would accept me," Darcy muttered, a little resentfully, then, speaking more clearly, elucidated: "It is for her sake that I have asked for a courtship. If, after coming to know me better, she still does not wish to share her life with me, then I do not want any stain on her reputation arising from a broken engagement. I have absolutely no doubts about my own intentions. If she will have me, I am hers. If she will not have me, she will still hold my heart - I am afraid that is irrevocably hers - but I will honour her decision and will not importune her further. Georgiana spoke without thinking - she sees no obstacles and would have us already married if she could, but as yet I have asked for nothing more than a courtship."
"And you say my Lizzy has agreed to this?"
"Yes, sir. She has done me that honour." Darcy could not help the slight curve of his lips as he remembered the event. "Do we have your consent for a courtship, then?"
"You must understand, Mr Darcy, that this comes as a great shock, and on top of a very difficult week. I will need to speak to Elizabeth before making my decision." He raised a hand to quell the immediate response he saw Darcy preparing to make. "I do not doubt your wealth or standing, sir, nor that you are an honourable gentleman, if a bit haughty. I merely wish to assure myself that Elizabeth has had a genuine change of sentiment about you. I could not rest easy if she had consented to a courtship out of some sense of guilt for having previously been so rude to you, or out of gratitude for your offer to assist with recovering Lydia (although as it turns out, Lydia was the captor, not the captive, in that particular adventure. No, sir, you must grant me this. I will speak to Elizabeth, then give you your answer."
Darcy bowed his head in acknowledgement of older gentleman's ultimatum. He could hardly censure him for placing Elizabeth's happiness first. "Very well. I understand your caution. I would do no less should some man seek permission to court my sister. But I beg you, sir, not to keep me waiting too long."
"You shall have my answer on the morrow, young man." Mr Bennet threw back the last of his brandy and rose to his feet. "Now, shall we see what mischief those girls of mine have been up to?"
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