I think this story has the most reviews I've ever gotten! Finally I find a story that works and attracts readers! Thanks for all have been reading and enjoy this next chapter. Also sorry about the long wait, I've been really swamped with college courses. Quarter Midterms coming up soon so I decided to take this chance to finish this chapter before becoming overcome with studying. Sorry about the long delays again! College is much more distracting and difficult than high school!


Feldt watched from the security camera as Marina and Setsuna talked and though she couldn't here what they were saying she felt jealousy pinch at her heart. She thought of the million reasons why Marina could not possibly attract Setsuna but something inside her felt that it was so. He had rescued her from the prison after all but hadn't he rescued Feldt as well? Was it just a duty to him? Was it simply his way of making himself feel less guilty for what he had done in the past? He had a strange way of acting unpredictably. Oftentimes she felt that he understood him and the he would surprise her and everyone else again. Who was she to believe he only cared about her? Was she a fool to believe that what had happened between them on earth was something special? They were forced to lean on each other in that time and what had happened could have been because of the general safety they felt around each other. They needed to hold onto each other in that time and now there were so many others around them. If that were true then what was this feeling in her mind? What was it that made her heart beat faster everytime she saw him?

A single tear slid down her face as she realized that maybe trying to erase her own pain by rejecting Setsuna was not the best way to do things. She still cared so much about him yet there was part of her that wanted to get back at him for leaving her. Did he just leave her to help her see the truth? They weren't special. They weren't anything more than friends, comrades who were together for a time. A dark time.

She had disobeyed his wishes and gone back to the battlefield simply for revenge and it had caused her to realize that she really had no more of a reason to fight than she had initially thought. If she really didn't know what she was fighting for than what was she doing here? A bit of anger welled up in her as she watched Marina easily talk to Setsuna. She slammed her hand on the desk shutting down the monitor as anger welled up inside her. Things were over between her and Setsuna it seemed and she had her own confused feelings for someone else to deal with now.


Feldt wandered around the mobile suit hangar half spying on the new Lockon while trying to look like she was doing other work. There had been a time in the past where she had felt giddy feelings for the old Lockon; simply put she had a crush on him. His kindness and his general will to want to help everyone had attracted her. Now she found herself wondering about his brother, was he anything like his predecessor? When Lockon got out of his mobile suit she was a little embarrassed that she happened to be standing there. She turned around quickly when Haro bounced up to her.

"Feldt, Feldt," Haro said.

"Hey," Lockon said waving to her in a friendly gesture as she turned around slowly, "I'm sorry but I keep getting the feeling that you've been watching me."

"Feldt loved Lockon," Haro said making Feldt a little angry.

"HARO!" she reprimanded clenching her fists together. She really didn't want anyone to know about her feelings for the old Lockon especially since now she felt more for Setsuna, though her feelings for the dark haired young man were very confusing. There was really way too much drama in her life right now and it was causing her a lot of pain. This wasn't happening, she did not want to be in such an uncomfortable position now.

"I'm not my brother," Lyle said solemnly looking down. Feldt realized that he must be feeling very uncomfortable with being compared to his brother all the time. Part of her wanted to say something profound about what Lockon did to the help the team but she was a little too embarrassed right now.

"I know," Feldt sighed, "i'm sorry." She quickly took a step back.

"But," he said taking her chin in his hand, "I might be able to fill in for him." With that he kissed her and it felt completely wrong. It wasn't like any of her kisses from Setsuna, every fiber of her being rejected him willing that he would disappear at this moment.. and when he released her before he could even speak she reflexively slapped him across the face as hard as she could. Tears filled her eyes as she felt her feelings for Setsuna surface and the confusion that rocked her mind escalate. There was no way this just happened, it was so wrong.

She ran out of the hangar and down the hall. Why did things have to be so hard? She soon walked down the halls of the ship trying to stop the tears that were flowing from her eyes so rapidly, her breathing became labored and unsteady as she tried to calm herself but it was just getting so hard. Suddenly she saw him, Setsuna turned from where he was standing in the hall to face her. He saw the tears flowing from her eyes, the labored breaths that came from her weary lungs and the pain that was written all over her face.

"Feldt," he said reaching a hand out toward her, "are you alright." He floated closer toward her. She didn't answer him as she remembered the way he had been looking at Marina. Instead of staying there she bolted to the one place in the entire ship where she could be perfectly alone.

With each bend there was a fresh flow as she collapsed onto her bed as soon as she made it to her room. Tears fell down to the floor as she allowed herself to fall onto the soft surface. She buried herself in her blankets trying to hide from everything. What was she doing? Why was she living her life this way? How could she turn it all around? Feldt couldn't understand her own heart and she knew she would be lonely forever unless she learned how to let people in. Sure she had become more open since the last war, she had Christina's influence to thank for that, but she still felt alone as if she were blindly walking through life unable to see the next turn she would take. There was no one there who could relate, they all had reasons to fight except for her.

Setsuna in that moment stayed in the place where he was standing stunned at her behavior. In his observance she hadn't really changed as much as she has been trying to tell people. She was still the same little scared Feldt. She was still afraid of people seeing her cry, it had taken him awhile to get her to let him in on earth. He no longer knew how to comfort her and he didn't even know where she had gone. He knew that even if he did she probably wouldn't let him. Whatever had gone on between them had passed and now the importance of what he was doing had once again dominated his thoughts. The world had to change and he would fight to ensure the future, it was his reason, his purpose. His feelings for Feldt were still there, but his mind no longer turned to them as they became nothing. He would fix the world before taking time for his own happiness.

After awhile Feldt left her room again and this time she went to stare out into space. She had put so much upon herself and she had forgotten everything that was important in life. Why was she there? Because she now truly believed in everything that Celestial Being stood for but did she really want to fight for it? She had just begun to let everything from the past and present get to her. What if she just found a way to let go? Could she bury it? She felt so many feelings; sadness from past loss, jealously because of Marina's closeness to Setsuna, disgust from the kiss with the new Lockon, Resolve to continue fighting for a reason and most of all she felt a light on the inside of herself shining toward something she couldn't understand. New tears formed in her eyes as she relived all her hopes and dreams in that moment. She still loved Setsuna but her life here wasn't the way she wanted it to be. There had to be another way, a discovery she just hadn't made yet and as the past washed over her one memory stopped her. Could it all lie back on earth? Or would she blindly walk back into the emptiness she had never been able to escape?


Feldt sat in the chair across from Ian trying to keep from crying again. He had found her looking out into space once again letting tears fall from her eyes. He had known Feldt since she was a very little girl and he did not like the way she had been behaving lately. She had never had anyone to talk about her problems to in the past, or so he thought, so he decided to tell her he would listen. He didn't know what he was getting into but he was the closest thing she had to a father figure in her life and he figured it was his duty.

"What's been wrong with you Feldt?" he asked her. She had been way to emotional lately.

"They're gone and they're never coming back," Feldt said letting a few tears slip out, "My parents, Litcht, Christina, Lockon. I thought I let it all go but then..." What had happened with the new Lockon had reopened old wounds but she realized that it had been building up since Setsuna left her in Eurasia.

"Feldt," he began.

"No," she said, "this isn't all because of the new Lockon. This is my fault, I can't control everything that happened and so I fight it all. In trying to fight I lie to myself and end up hurt." She looked at the older mechanic, "you can't help me and neither can anyone else, this is a fight I have to face on my own. And if that way is a path of lonlieness then that's the path I'll take." Maybe she had tried to hard to place the past in front of her, maybe the best way of fighting off the pain was to learn to understand herself. She had to go back to the place where it all started, back home; not the estate in Eurasia, the place she had been born, her real home.

"What are you talking about?" he asked her a little confused.

"I'm not going to lie to myself any longer," Feldt replied, "and I'm not going to allow the past to dictate my feelings anymore." She got up and walked out of the room. No more would those little pieces of her heart slowly cut her apart. She loved Setsuna and though she could not bring herself to tell him she would no longer reject it. Celesital Being wasn't a place for her to discover who she was; these people were all just as broken as she was. She was on her own in this and it was time she stopped depending to much on what happened to others.

Nothing mattered anymore but her fight. She had to keep fighting for the future instead of wasting time living in the past but Celestial Begin was not the place for her to come to terms with herself. Come what may she would keep going no matter what happened. Things would work out with Setsuna if they were meant to, she would no longer deny her feelings for him and if they weren't meant to be then that meant there was someone else out there for her. She wiped away her final tears over everything. She was fighting for love and truth instead of hurt and pain. She was going to discover who she was and maybe in the future she would return to Celestial Being. Someday she was sure she would find reason to return. But for now her path led her away from theirs, into an unknown world of painful memories, a word the would undoubtedly show her the truth.


"The enemy has been sighted, Setsuna, Teiria, Lockon, Allelujah, Feldt, please Board your machines," Feldt was awakened from her sleep by Meliena's voice. What was going on? There was a battle around. Had ALAWS found them already?

She got up and quickly threw her pilots suit on before running to the bay. She was met there by Ian.

"Feldt," he said, "Taube can't fight underwater, you have to wait until Sumeragi figures things out."

"Just make sure we're ready," Feldt responded, "I need to use this machine to get to the surface."

"You're not going to try Trans-AM! It's not ready! We still haven't put it together!" he said in shock.

"How else am I going to get to the surface?" she questioned.

"Just wait Feldt," he replied, "We'll find another way." Feldt climbed into her machine with a slight hint of anger. She would have to be able to get above water anyway if she was going to leave them.

"Feldt!" She saw Sumeragi's face on the monitor, "stay where you are until further notice." Feldt clenched her fists, Ian must have told Sumeragi of her craving for rash actions at this moment. A screen popped up on Feldt's monitor and she watched as the 00 attacked the large unit that was causing all the problems.

Setsuna tore the unit into pieces in a short amount of time, no doubt shocking the people above the surface. The other Gundam's began to launch as soon as it was finished and Allelujah gave Setsuna a ride to the surface. Feldt impatiently slammed the controls of her gundam turning it on; she used her codes to open the doors and soon she was out in the water. She looked through her options and prepared to turn on the Trans-AM.

"Wait FELDT!" she heard Sumeragi's voice, "We're sending you Tieira, he'll give you a ride to the surface." Feldt silently acknowledged the image of her tactical forecaster with a nod. When Tieria approached she docked with his machine and he turned Trans-AM on.

"Don't disobey orders again Feldt," Tieria said with a bored tone, "if they order you to wait in a Gundam you're gonna get a change to fight; be patient next time." Feldt felt the water pressure decreasing as they got higher and higher. She knew they were almost there, very soon they would be fighting. Suddenly the shot out of the water and Feldt quickly undocked with Tieria's machine coping with the sudden change in speed. She saw two ALAW's units instantly move toward her. Transforming into Gundam mode, she pulled out her beam saber and dodged the shots that the units shot at her. She then fired back before moving into a high speed to get close to the units. The enemy unit dogged her beam saber and she realized that close combat with them was not the best way. Transforming into her mobile armor state Feldt pushed her unit to rapid speeds climbing high in the sky and dodging the two units rapid shots.

"I will destroy you!" she declared as rage filled her mind. She swiftly sun around the units outmaneuvering them and completely destroying one by laying down a collection of rapid shots on it's back. She would not be defeated by two inferior ALAWs suits, she was in a Gundam. As she saw two more units approaching she realized she would need to up her game, switching back to Gundam mode she pulled out her first beam saber and a second one. Using a series of swift arm movements she blocked the shots that the mobile suits in front of her fired at her. To their surprise she suddenly unveiled a new weapon in her machine as compartments in the arms of her mobile suit opened up revealing two guns. They fired rapid shots damaging two of the three suits that now attacked her.

"Feldt Watch out!" She heard a voice as she noticed two more suits on her scanners just a little too late. Why did they always come in pairs? Feldt quickly transformed into mobile armor mode and tried to get out of there but her machine took a few shots in her attempt to escape. She was now surrounded and trying to outmaneuver five mobile suits. She had no other choice. She pushed the button for her trans-AM.

"FELDT NO!" She heard Ian's voice. Her machine began to glow as her speed increased but suddenly the light went out and she realized that she had spend much of her particles trying to start up the trans-Am. She was now worse off than before. Would she make it out of this.

As three of the machines began to approach Taube she pulled out her beam sabers hoping that she would be able to fight them off. It was then that shots began to rain on the machines approaching her. She looked in aw as many more signals appeared on her scanners, signals that were apparently there to help Celestial Being. Withdraw signals quickly came from the ALAWs ships as the five machines all began to withdraw. Feldt turned around to see her her saviors were and was surprised to see Kathron had been the ones to come and save them.

Feldt smiled as she realize Celesial Being was no longer alone.


She didn't want to do this but she knew it was the right thing to do. Leaving without warning was sure to leave them wondering; surely Teiria would understand. She had been brought back to Celestial Being by him; she had not come back by her own choice. She wasn't ready to fight this battle. She walked around the corner and saw him working on some tune ups for his machine.

"Tieria," she said his name and he turned to her.

"Yes, Feldt," he said acknowledging her. She knew it would be better to get straight to the point.

"I am leaving Celestial Being," she quickly said looking down to the ground a bit ashamed of how her statement sounded.

"I know," he said, "Ian and I came to that conclusion this afternoon."

"You did," Feldt was a bit more ashamed that she was so readable, "I had tried to find some other solution to my problem but nothing really seemed to fit."

"Are you sure that this is the right course of action?" Teiria asked, "running toward your past instead of from it." She was shocked at how much he had really perceived from her recent behavior. She thought about all she longed to know and the more she had pondered it the greater her desire to leave for the time being had become.

"I am sure," Feldt responded, "there are so many questions that have just stirred inside me. I need to know about my parent's reasons for fighting in Celestial Being before I can really determine what my own are."

"Then go Feldt," he replied, "for those of us who are fighting have a reason to fight and you should find yours before fighting anymore."

"Thank you Teiria," she replied.

"Just make sure you come back in once piece," he responded. She smiled at the faith he had that she would return. It was true that through it all she had full plans of returning to Celestial Being again once she found her reasons to fight.


Feldt stood in front of Taube holding the helmet of her pink pilots suit feeling a hint of reluctance at what she was about to do. She would be alone out there, but she had known that when she made this decision. The loneliness did not bother her as much as the idea that if something were to happen she could potentially be apprehended by the enemy. It was now fear that tried to stop her, not her own will. Fear that she would fail and fear that she would not find a reason to return. Celestial Being was family to her, and she cared about them but this was something she needed. The darkness of her past, the sadness of her life and the weaknesses that she had seen in her own heart had become such a part of her. She had to go. She looked up and her Gundum with new determination when she heard a voice behind her.

"Fedlt," she turned to see the last person she expected there, it was Setsuna.

"What?" She asked suddenly. She looked at him with slight regret in her eyes and a silent plea. She wanted him to give her a reason to stay; for without it she would have no choice but to leave. Setsuna was still the one person that could convince her to stay, he could become her reason to fight but in order to become that he would have to ask her to stay and tell her why he wanted her to stay. His own heart was focused on his mission and for that he didn't see the pleading in her eyes, he was there but he didn't really understand why.

"You're leaving aren't you?" He asked.

"Did Tieria tell you?" she responded.

"No," he replied looking right into her eyes, "but I know what it's like to leave things behind." She knew he understood that all too well.

"I know," She looked down to the ground; she would not cry again.

"Are you coming back?" he asked her, telling himself that her Gundam was important to the fight though something inside him told him that there was another reason he wanted her to come back.

"I don't know," she replied, "maybe someday."

"We'll miss you," he said. She felt disappointment reach her heart as she realized he wasn't there to ask her to stay; he wasn't telling her anything she didn't already know. He did not feel the same way as she did.

"Well stay alive," she said climbing into her gundam.

"Goodbye," he said hastily as she shut the cockpit, "take care." He whispered the last part as he felt sorrow reach his own heart. He stood there watching Taube fly away with Feldt inside; wishing that he was with her at the moment. He knew he had just made a mistake in letting her go as his heart felt it but he couldn't follow her, their paths led them in different directions. He was destined to fight in his Gundam and the beauty of her heart would lead her to change the world in more beautiful ways, he was sure of it. The resolved part of him held him in place just staring and watching her fly away though a silent and unheard part of him had a slight will to follow her. He was afraid her her rejection just as much as she was afraid of his.

She didn't look back; she had to discover who she was before she would allow herself to fight with Celestia Being again. She had allowed her twisted and broken past to dictate her feelings; that would happen no more.


Hope that makes you guys happy for a time. Again I am so sorry for the long wait, i'll try to do better next time.

So the story has taken a, hopefully, unexpected turn. I got a hazy idea of what I needed to do to develop a backstory to Taube and Feldt's family so I ran with it and I am still not sure where it is going to lead me, but that's what I like about writing! So please REVIEW, I want to know what you think about the new plot twist!

-Smi