Hunger Games Parody Part 11

The bright lights engulf me as I take my seat marked 12 next to that freaking thing some call Peeta. I try and sit as far away from him as I can. "Katniss, I must say that this outfit suits you! I just love how Lady Gaga incorporates meat and fashion!" he chuckles in a Capitol accent. "Um sure whatever. Why are you talking like that?" I ask. "Effie told me I sounded nicer that way, and that it makes girls go crazy," he bats his eyes at me. I pluck out one of his blond eyelashes. "Ow!" he squeals. "Keep your facial hair to yourself!" I say and push him out of his chair. The other tributes turn around and stare at me. "What's wrong with you Katniss can't you see he's smitten?" says Fox face, or in English Face of the Fox. I roll my eyes, "He better keep his smits to himself!" I say and stab her in the foot with a porcupine that happened to be in the one foot radius.

Finally the announcer Claudius Templesmith comes on stage. This year he appears to be dressed as a woman….Katniss likes! He/ She skips over to the mike, "I'm so excited to see you all here!" he chimes trying to sound like a woman. "Us too cutie!" I call back to him. Everyone in the crowd falls silent. "Um, thanks but being a woman I prefer men. Anyway let's start with District 1!" he says. Glimmer is wearing a see through gold shoe on her right foot….and that's it. "Wow! You have great designers!" says Claudius. "They wanted my look to tell a story," says Glimmer reading the note cards in her hand. The tributes go by one by one in order of district. When Rue goes up she is dressed like a pigeon with a broken wing. "What do you think your designers were going for?" asks Claudius. "Well they said it's to represent how I'm like a bird who's gonna die," she says smiling. I laugh, "This chick is so right!" I cackle. Finally it's my turn. "So Katniss I heard you shot your sister at the Reaping!" says Claudius. "Well yea I did. Is that so wrong?" I ask puzzled. "Actually yes, it's against the law," says Claudius. "Yea I know!" I say in a challenged voice. "So can you tell us why you got a ½ in training?" he asks. "Well, I'm not supposed to talk about it but if you must know I ran in wearing a mummy outfit and bludgeoned the Game Makers with a wrench," I say starring up at the Game Makers. They shutter. "Um, Okay so anybody you have a crush on?" he asks. "YOU SWEET CHEEKS!" I scream at him. He backs up a bit and my time is up. What will Peeta say? To be Continued!