"Why did I have to come with you again?" Leonard asked, as he and Sheldon walked through the pharmacy.

"Why didn't you ever wear nasal strips before your nose job?" Sheldon retorted.

"They didn't help, and I asked you first."

"Didn't help!" Sheldon faced him. "Why wouldn't they help?"

"Because it was a deviated septum, not something as simple as a clogged sinus or an open mouth."

They resumed walking.

"Do you think they'll work on Amy and me?"

"They should...if even it's just the one part of you that's normal."

Sheldon picked up a pack of Breathe Right and examined it.

"I'm proud of you, Sheldon. This is a big step."

"It is?"

"Yes. Not so big that you shouldn't do it," Leonard said hastily. "Hell, you're going on six years since your first date; most people would be married by now."

"You and Penny weren't," Sheldon answered. "It took you seven years to land that trout."

"Six years and eleven months."

"And thirty days."

"It still counts as six! There was one day left."

"Actually, there were six hours left. It was really nothing." Sheldon picked up a different product, viewed it and set it back on the shelf. "Raj has previously stated you and Penny are the modern Ross and Rachel of Pasadena, where the dark-haired scientist chases after the dim-witted blond ex-waitress in the next apartment...I have no idea who Ross and Rachel are, but given the confidence with which he spoke, I don't have to."

Leonard looked at him askance. "I'm sure my life doesn't have everything in common with some TV show."

"No, not everything...Raj also said the character of Ross didn't wear glasses, or have asthma, and stands over six feet."

"Ouch."

"Of course we have the obvious technological advances, and an extra person in our regular group. Aside from that..." Sheldon paused, looking him up and down. "Yes."

"Okay, I get it. I'm the least cool among nerds."

"Don't look at it like that! If anything, you come before Howard." Sheldon picked up a third product, examined it briefly and tossed it into the basket that hung from Leonard's arm.

"Does anyone come after Howard?"

"No, of course not, don't be silly. Alright, time to head on over to the headphones aisle." Sheldon led him from the pharmacy.

"If this is Amy's idea, how come you're the one shopping?" Leonard asked.

"She's working today. I'm not," he answered simply. "It all works out for the best; I need new shoes anyway."

"But the sole you claim to have is good?" Leonard joked.

They rounded the corner - and right into Priya.

"Priya?" Sheldon asked.

"What are you doing back?" Leonard asked.

And she dismissively waved her hand and said, "Mujhe samajh nahin aata."

"What?" Leonard asked. "Priya, what are you saying?"

She walked past him, saying only, "Nahin, kshama kare, main nahi hoon."

She kept going.

"That was weird, right?" Sheldon asked.

Leonard handed him the basket. "You're on your own," he said, and began to follow Priya - or perhaps the Priya lookalike. Digging out his iPhone, he dialed her number.

And waited.

Nothing happened.

Until an unfamiliar Indian man approached her, looped his arm through hers and began to lead her away. She began talking to him in Hindi, leaving Leonard to stand there wondering what had just happened.

She looked like Priya. She dressed like Priya. She even smelled like Priya.

Leonard dialed Raj's number.

"Hello?"

"Raj, it's Leonard. Listen, is Priya in town?"

On the other end, Raj chuckled and carefully made his voice indifferent. "Don't you think if she were, I'd know it?"

"I knew you'd have the answer," Leonard said absently, and hung up.

-0-0-0-0-

Back home, Raj dialed his sister's number. "Raj here. Leonard just called me, asking about you."

The response was entirely in Hindi. "No, you can't talk to him! ...Why not? What do you mean why not? What reason do you have to talk to him? You're married. ...Well, if you do talk to him I'll never do you any more favors ever again." He waited anxiously for her reply. "Okay, then I'll tell Mummy and Daddy every secret of yours. ...What secrets? I don't have any secrets." His smile faded as Priya kept talking. "Okay, okay, do what you want."

He hung up and looked at the attentive Howard. "Deal's off."

Howard smiled intrusively. "What secrets do you have that are more valuable than a friend's marriage?" he pried.

Raj glared at him. "None of your business. Just watch the movie," he said, and took it off mute.