A/N: Hi! Did you miss me? Sorry it took me so long. I was trying to focus on finishing Easter is a Pagan Holiday. And…I finally did! YAY! It's the first I've ever finished. I'm so happy. Anyway here's the companion to Scared. It's going to have another companion (They're having a threesome.) I don't know what I'm going to call it. But when it comes up, I'll announce it.
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"Mister Leonhart, Sora managed to pull through, but he's in a tight position. He's in intensive care right now, just in case things head for the worst, however we don't think anything like that will happen. The doctors fixed him up really good.
Leon doesn't know whether to sit, stand, or just fall down whenever the nurse tells him the news. He's been waiting all night for someone to say something, and right then he's so confused about everything he thinks his head might explode. Five hours, two minutes, seven seconds…only to come down to, 'he pulled through but he could die over night'. Couldn't they have just waited another five hours until they were sure? Couldn't they come to him with absolution?
He looks around to Riku, who's not crying, but seems to be having close if not the same thought process. His eyes are clouded, and he keeps fidgeting with his hands. Leon doesn't know what to do.
"You all don't have to be here." He says gently. "You all can go home and I'll keep you posted."
They're all reluctant at first, but slowly they go. Cloud goes first, giving a slight pat on the back to Leon. Aerith and Tifa follow, demanding that even if the nurse came to tell him Sora took an irregular gasp of breath, he had best call them. And then it was only he, Riku, and Yuffie.
"You guys don't have to stay here." He says. "You need sleep."
They both adopt one of those stares of doom, and Leon knows he shouldn't have even brought up the idea.
"I'm not going anywhere until I know he's okay." Riku says firmly, though his voice is cracked from the crying he's been falling in and out of.
Yuffie nods in agreement, and then adds. "I've gotta make sure you two don't waste away for him."
Leon nods in understanding, even though he wishes they would take his advice and go home! But he doesn't say anything and begins his pacing again, now fully aware that he's doing it because Yuffie's yelled at him twice. But he'd rather pace, because if he sits he'll start feeling the nausea. He'll start feeling the fear.
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A day and a half passes and Leon's still pacing the floor. Riku's left the waiting room to get some fresh air for a few minutes, and probably to run around the block a few times, because that's just what Riku does when he's worried. Yuffie went to her house to cook a quick dinner, surprising the hell out of Leon, because he didn't know she could cook anything passed Mac'n'cheese.
Leon's still there though. Only leaving the little waiting room to use the loo or get more coffee. A nurse comes in ever five hours to tell him Sora's still stable, but he's yet to wake. Leon is feeling so nervous he can barely breath, and his head is spinning and he wishes the little brat in the ICU would do something, if just to calm his nerves.
Riku comes back, and Yuffie brings food, and still nothing happens.
Leon's mind is torturing him, sending him messages that he's never ever wanted to think about. It keeps saying; He'll never wake up. He'll never smile at you again. He'll never love you again. He's just inches away from pulling all his hair out, and taking a drill bit to his head to get those thoughts out, because it's killing him inside. And though he'll never show it to anyone, he's having a mental breakdown on the inside. Sora might not come back to him.
And then the nurse cones down the hall again. She's very familiar with the three of them; she's had to deal with them the most. She's the most down-to-earth about the entire ordeal and doesn't pretend to hurt as they do. She walks up to them and looks no more affected than any other time.
"Mr. Leonhart?" She says in her cool tone. "Sora still isn't awake, but we believe he's stable. We're allowing him visitors, but only one at a time." Leon nods, and looks to Riku.
"Go ahead." He says, more than a little afraid to see Sora in the state he's in. And honestly, he's afraid that if he saw Sora now, that picture would be the last of the brunette that he could burn into his mind.
Riku nods understandingly, and follows the nurse. But as soon as they're gone another one comes in.
"She didn't want to have to tell you, but you have to know." She says, with pity in her eyes. She takes a deep breath. "At the rate Sora's going, there's a fifty-fifty chance that he'll wake up. I wish she wouldn't have taken your friend so I could tell him now, but if I don't tell you she won't."
Yuffie covers her mouth with her hand, tiny sobs erupting from her all over again, but she does't let any tears slip. But Leon only goes numb. It figures that fear can't just play tricks on him; it has to go the entire way, and be true. He finally sits down, and rests his head in his hands. He doesn't cry, or yell, or even shake. He just sits there and tries to remember all of the things he's ever done with Sora.
The nurse tries to comfort, he registers somewhere in the back of him mind. He wishes she would go away. He wishes the other had told them and left, because she can do that. She's so cold. He's upset that this case is getting to one of the nurses, and even more that it has to be Sora's case.
But Leon makes sure to get her name later.
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On the third day he's there, it's only Riku and him pacing around the waiting room. Leon finally told Yuffie to go home and she had agreed to angrily. He would try with Riku, but he can tell from the death glare Riku gives him every once and a while that it won't do him any good.
But he's yet to be into see Sora. Still afraid of what he'll see, that that'll be the last thing he sees. So he sits next to Riku, who he hasn't told about Sora's coma, and he waits for something, anything. Anything except the silence, and the unknowing that has settled over the room.
And then Kairi runs in and he suddenly wishes he hadn't been wishing that. He's never been sure of what to do with Kairi. She's so enigmatic that he's only ever made himself stay in a room with her twice, other than that he's always had Sora, a thought that makes his throat constrict. She can be completely fine with the world ending, but stepping on a butterfly could send her into hysterics. So he just stays sitting while she hugs Riku and rambles on and on about something he can't even comprehend because she speaks ninety to nothing.
He wishes it were quiet again, and so he goes into the hall to think by himself.
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Kairi left halfway into the third day, promising she would return and Leon thought he would just from the nearest balcony he could find. But she didn't come back, and Leon was mad at her.
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On the fifth day, Leon's about to destroy everything he can get his hands on. There's been no news for nine hours and he's getting upset. He wants to know what's going on. He's used to getting an update every six hours and he's going to punch something if he doesn't hear something from someone soon.
Riku's just sits in his chair placidly. He hasn't been eating, and he looks sick, but when Yuffie asks about him, Riku lies to her and Leon doesn't dare tell her the truth. Leon still hasn't told him about the possibility of Sora not waking up, but he gets the sense that Riku knows this even without him vocalizing it.
He's staring down the hall again, waiting as best he can, and finally he sees it. The emotionless nurse he's come to know as Quistis is running down the hall, with a smile on her face. "He's awake," She says enthusiastically. She comes into the waiting room. "Mr. Leonhart he's awake. You can go in and see him."
He doesn't ask how she knows that he hasn't been into see him, or how she knows that he'll finally go in now. His hearts pounding so fast, and his feet had already begun taking him towards where everyone had told him his room was. He's so excited about Sora being awake! He'll get to see him again. He'll get to apologize for cursing his name right before he picked up the phone!
When he gets to the room, he has to force himself to breathe a few times before entering and fainting from how happy he is. And then, he opens the door.
"Hey, Leon." Sora says, his voice cracking with disuse. He reaches out his hand, holding it so Leon can take it when he's close enough, which is in practically two seconds, because Leon can't stand to be away from Sora another second.
"Hey, baby." He says, stroking Sora's hair back, from his sickly face. "How are you feeling?"
Sora smiles. "Like I've just been hit by a car." He rasps, squeezing Leon's hand, albeit with little strength, in a loving manner.
Leon sits on the bed close to his hip. "That's not funny, Sora."
"I know. But they gave me drugs." He smirks, even though it goes away quickly. "Leon," He begins, his eyes clouding sadly. "Leon, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to…"
Leon chuckles at him. "Sora it's not you fault. You're fine. You're here. You're here and you're okay." He says, stroking the small hand in his, and feeling his eyes water. He presses kisses to his hand, and holds it to his face. "You'll be okay."
He shakes his head 'no', his deep blue eyes watering, "Leon, I want to tell you something. I told the nurse not to, that way I could tell you first." He looks away and pulls his hand away from Leon, resting it on his chest. He takes a deep breath, though whatever he's trying to keep under control it doesn't work. "Leon, I can't move my legs." He whispers. "We've tried everything, but the doctor says this could be permanent." He's crying now, and Leon's starting to also because he can't stand to see his Sora cry like this. "I can't feel anything past my lower back. I'm sorry Leon! I'm sorry." He yells.
Leon leans forward and hushes him with a quick kiss. He's crying harder, because Sora shouldn't apologize for this; he shouldn't feel the need to say sorry for something that's not his fault. He shouldn't say sorry for something he has no control over.
"Please don't leave me." Sora says, when they break apart, holding onto Leon's shirt. "Please stay with me."
More tears fall down Leon's face, and grabs the hand that's holding onto his shirt. "I won't." He says, firmly. He wants Sora to believe him, because it's true. This is just another obstacle to get through, and they can handle this too. "I'll stay with you forever."
He cries, and Leon never cries.
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InnocentGuilt