Shiro was the unwitting center of attention as soon as he, Keith and Lance walked into the dining room for dinner with the rest of the team. As much as he appreciated everyone's concern, he found it difficult to focus on what they were saying to him, his mind wandering constantly to Lance and Keith – to what had just happened between them, and to everything that could, and to all the reasons he'd had to stop them from taking off his clothes-
"…can't even see a scar," Pidge was saying, standing up on her tiptoes, examining his forehead. He forced himself to smile.
"No scar. Callos fixed me right up."
"I'm sorry, Shiro," Krolia told him, clasping his hand in both of hers. "I hope you know that I… well, we waited for as long as we could."
"Don't apologize. It was the right call. I'm just glad you and Ragos made it out of there."
She smiled warmly at him, and he felt anxiousness squeezing inside his chest, wondering what she would think about his relationship with her son, once they decided it was time to tell her. Keith had been so young when Shiro had first entered his life. Would she understand how and why their dynamic had shifted? Would she be able to view Keith as the man he had grown up to be? Or would she dwell on their earlier circumstances: on their age difference, and the power imbalance that had once existed between them? Shiro wasn't sure, and even though he, Keith, and Lance had all agreed to let things settle between them before explaining their situation to the rest of the group, he knew he was going to find the secrecy and anticipation uncomfortable.
He finished hugging Hunk and shaking hands with Coran, then started toward the food at the back of the room, but Lance got his attention and waved him over to the table; he'd already made him a plate. Shiro rested a hand on his back – Fuck it, he thought – and then sat down between him and Keith. He took a few bites, chewing distractedly, grateful for their calming presence.
"You like those things, right?" Lance asked softly, pointing at his plate.
"I like all of this. Thanks, Lance."
Lance swallowed a bite, rolling his eyes with pleasure. "Oh man. I feel like I haven't eaten in a month."
"Yeah. It's been an intense few days. Or… weeks. Months. Years?"
Lance giggled, then shrugged. "I guess. But I wouldn't change it. I'd do it all again."
Shiro met his eye. "Really?"
Lance blinked at him. "To end up with… to end up here?" He nodded. "Yeah. No question."
He focused on his dinner again, but Shiro continued to stare in his direction, thinking, This is it. This is why I need you.
They ate in a companionable silence for a few more minutes, and as soon as most of the group seemed to be finished with their food, Keith cleared his throat to get their attention. Side conversations ceased, and everyone looked at him expectantly.
"Hey, guys," he said. "I know I talked to most of you after the battle, but I just wanted to say it again. Great work last night. I know things didn't exactly go according to plan, but it could've been much worse. You really came through."
"So did you, man," Hunk said. "None of us could've moved fast enough to catch that last ship. That was epic."
"Agreed," Allura said. "If they'd managed to escape…"
"But they didn't," Keith told her. "We have every reason to believe we're safe here, for the time being."
"All of us," Pidge said. "Thanks to you, Lance." Shiro saw him shift uncomfortably in his seat. He knew that as much as Lance craved praise and approval, there were times when it was still difficult for him to believe he deserved it. He rested the back of his hand against Lance's leg, under the table.
"Shiro," she went on, "I'm so glad you're okay, but… I don't think I really understand how Lance managed to get you out."
"Um," Lance said, glancing at him before turning back toward Pidge. "It's like I said before. I teleported with Kosmo onto the cruiser."
"But wasn't Shiro unconscious the whole time?" Pidge asked. "How did you know where to find him?"
"We found him together," Keith said. "I… I know I probably should've tried to explain this, before. You know how we're all connected through the lions? How you can feel that tug when one of us gets hurt, or has an idea we need to act on right away?"
The other paladins nodded their acknowledgement.
"Well… that connection got amplified somehow, between Shiro and me. I think it happened when his consciousness was still inside the black lion. He was the one who helped me get back to you, when you were fighting Lotor."
Pidge nodded again. "So you can actually see through each other's eyes?"
"If we want to, yeah."
"And you can connect to Lance, too?"
Shiro looked between Lance and Keith, his heart rate starting to climb. He had a feeling he knew where this conversation was headed, and based on the way they were blushing, they did, too.
"Yeah," Keith said. "But… we all might have the ability to connect like that, through the lions. I'm not sure."
"Oh," Pidge said, looking surprised. "I thought maybe it was because you've been… well… you know." She was blushing now, too. "Holding hands."
Shiro physically felt the breath Keith took before he answered her.
"I don't know. But you're right. We are seeing each other. Lance and me, and…"
"And me, too," Shiro finished. There was no point trying to hide it from them, now. "The three of us are seeing each other."
"No way!" Hunk said, his eyes wide. "The three of you? Wow. That is a seriously creative solution, guys. Kudos."
"Solution to what?" Pidge asked, looking confused.
"Well, Keith and Lance…" Hunk rambled, gesturing. "But then, Keith and Shiro, obviously, so…"
"I don't understand," Allura cut in, her eyebrows drawn together in concern. "The three of you are… what? In a relationship?"
"Yes," they said in unison.
"But… don't you think that's something the rest of us needed to know about?" She sounded angry, now. Shiro raised his hands a little.
"Yes," he said again, trying to keep his voice even. "You all have a right to know about things that could affect the team."
"We were going to tell you," Keith added. "It's just… new."
Allura glared between them for a moment before she said, "Shiro… I wouldn't have expected this from you."
Shiro felt the edges of his mouth start to tingle. He was having trouble swallowing.
"Allura," Krolia said, her tone dangerous. "It's not your place."
"Yeah," Hunk said, much more timidly. "I mean, we've all kinda been through enough, don't you think? If they're happy…"
"Being a paladin isn't about being happy," Allura practically spat. "It's about accomplishing the mission. It's about putting the needs of others before your own."
"They do that all the time!" Pidge said, arguing. "That's all any of us do!" She looked at Keith. "You could've tried to ground Shiro yesterday, right? You could've tried to stop him from boarding the cruiser?"
Keith nodded. "I could have."
"And you could've tried to save him instead of going after that ship, too," she added.
"Yes."
She gestured in their direction, glaring at Allura. "See? How can you even suggest that they don't know how to put the team first? Especially after you and Lotor-"
"Pidge," Lance said, cutting her off. "Don't."
It was too late, though. Shiro looked at Allura and saw tears streaming down her face. She sat still for a moment, staring at nothing in particular, and then she got up from the table and walked out of the room. Coran gave them all a sympathetic look before he hurried after her.
"Pidge…" Keith said. "I know you're trying to be supportive, and I appreciate that, but we can't support each other by tearing down someone else on the team." He said this so calmly that Shiro was stunned, and then soothed, and then overwhelmed with pride.
Pidge hung her head.
"You're right. I… I'm sorry."
"Tell Allura that, once she's cooled off a little, okay?"
Pidge nodded. "I will."
"Okay." Keith sighed, and Shiro felt the urge to rest his head against his chest, to get as close as he could to that calming breath. "…You're all entitled to your concerns and opinions," Keith was saying, "but I think it might be better if you shared them with one of us individually."
"Uh, for the record, I have zero concerns," Hunk said, raising his hand. "I love you guys. I just want you to be happy."
"Same here," Pidge said, her voice small. "I trust you. If this is what you want, I'm really, really happy for you."
"I know my opinion probably counts for very little," Romelle said, standing up from the table, looking profoundly uncomfortable "but you've more than proven yourselves as paladins. Your personal lives should be your own. I wish you well."
They thanked her, and she cleared her plate and left. Hunk and Pidge excused themselves, too, while Krolia stayed decidedly silent, staring at a spot on the table, her expression unreadable. Shiro reached for Keith and Lance's hands under the table.
"Mom?" Keith prompted, sounding much less confident than he had just a moment ago. "We were going to tell you…"
She nodded, then met his eye.
"I disagree with the way Allura voiced her concerns," she said. "She's not wrong, though. The potential for complication is… unsettling." She hesitated, then said, "Still, I can't picture anyone I'd rather see standing by your side."
The three of them exhaled as one.
"We really were going to tell you soon," Shiro said. "We've barely had time to talk it through between the three of us."
"I understand. And Romelle was right. You're entitled to your privacy."
They all stood up from the table. Krolia approached Keith and rested a hand on his shoulder.
"Keith… trying to build a life with your father wasn't necessarily the wisest choice," she said. "But it was, by far, the best decision I've ever made. I wish I could protect you from the kinds of choices I've had to make in my life, but I know that I can't. So you'll have to protect each other, as best you can."
Keith nodded slowly. Shiro guessed he couldn't speak at the moment, so he said, "We will, Krolia. I promise."
"I promise, too," Lance said.
She nodded at each of them, then squeezed Keith's shoulder and left them alone.
"Keith?" Lance prompted, as soon as she was out of sight. "Are you okay?"
He nodded again, then cleared his throat.
"I'm sorry for just blurting everything out like that. We said we would try not to lie…"
"It's okay, Red," Lance said, stepping closer to him. "Right, Shiro?"
"Yeah," Shiro said, feeling much calmer now that Keith was the one who needed reassurance. "You did great. It's better that they know."
"What should we do about Allura, though?" Keith asked them.
"Maybe I should talk to her?" Lance offered. "I think I can guess why she reacted like that."
Shiro rested a hand on his arm. "Let me try, first? She singled me out. I think she might need help understanding how I fit into everything."
Lance nodded. He stood up on his tiptoes to kiss Shiro's cheek, and then did the same for Keith, though he didn't need to stand up quite so tall. Then he rolled his shoulders and said, "I think I might go take a shower."
Keith took hold of his wrist. "No." He frowned. "I mean…" He let go, a blush climbing from his neck to his cheeks. "Sorry. Yeah. I probably need one, too."
Lance was staring back at him. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
"Red."
Keith made a face. "It's just…" He slid his arms around Lance's waist, pulling him close, pressing his cheek against his neck. "It's just the way you smell," he murmured, almost too quietly for Shiro to hear.
"Keith…" Shiro said, resting a hand on his back while Lance stroked his hair. "I doubt it's the kind of thing that can get washed off by a shower. It'll be okay."
Keith nodded against Lance's shoulder, relaxing a bit, and Shiro felt the same pang he'd experienced earlier. It wasn't jealousy – the way Lance held his gaze while he moved his fingers through Keith's hair made his heart ache with happiness – but he felt like a witness, again, instead of a participant. There was a glitch in the circuit, and he was the cause.
He put his arms around them, and they immediately adjusted their position to hold onto him, too. Keith kissed him lightly before resting his head on his shoulder.
The discomfort eased, a bit.
"Allura?" Shiro knocked on her door for the third time. "It's Shiro. Can we just talk for a minute?"
The door slid open. She didn't look at him, but she stood to the side to let him pass, then closed the door behind him and sat down on her bunk. He took the chair at the table on the other side of the room, relieved to find that her expression was composed, though her eyes were still red and puffy.
"I'm sorry," he told her. "If it seemed like we were trying to hide something from you, that wasn't our intention."
She didn't meet his eye.
"You must think I'm such a hypocrite."
"No," he said gently. "I think you learned a brutal lesson from what happened with Lotor. I think you'd do anything to keep the team from being compromised."
She nodded. "I would. And I thought I could trust you to do the same."
"Allura…" He stared down at his artificial hand, trying to organize his thoughts. "I'm not sure if you know this, but the half the team's been hanging by a thread lately. Do you know why Keith lost contact with the black lion?"
She finally looked at him. "No. I don't."
"It was because I told him we couldn't be together. And I really thought I was teaching him some kind of lesson about leadership, or… I don't know what. I thought I was prioritizing the mission, and I thought I could force him to do that, too. But I…" He paused, because his voice had become unsteady. "I crushed him. I almost wiped out every reason he ever cared about piloting Voltron or winning the war. And if Lance hadn't stepped up… if he hadn't pulled Keith out of that place… I don't think we'd even have a black paladin right now." He shook his head. "I had it wrong. We're not machines, Allura. We're not supposed to be. Keith needs this. Lance does, too."
She blinked at him.
"And you?"
He swallowed. He looked away from her face, reminding himself not to drain all the honesty from his thoughts before the words left his mouth.
"I probably need this more than either of them. I can't remember the last time I felt like a human being, before today."
"Oh, Shiro…" He looked at her and found tears on her cheeks again. "I'm so sorry."
"I'm sorry, too," he said. "I know there's something between you and Lance. I know he feels really strongly for you."
She let go of her breath, and a tiny sob came out with it.
"Lance is free to do as he wishes. And it's just as well. I think… I think I should've given myself more time, after…" She sniffed and wiped at her cheeks with the back of her hand, then straightened up, looking regal, once again. "I think I've behaved badly. Forgive me."
He nodded. "I do."
It took three knocks before Keith answered his door, too, and the reason was immediately evident. He was holding a towel, and water droplets were clinging to the ends of his damp hair, falling onto his cheeks and forehead. He was wearing a pair of the close-fitting, earth-colored pants the Olkari kept stocked in all of their rooms, but he was naked from the waist up.
Shiro stared.
"Hey!" Keith said, his eyes bright, his smile wide.
Shiro went on staring.
"Um… do you want to come in?"
Shiro blinked.
"Uh."
Keith looked down at his own naked torso.
"Oh. Right. Hang on."
He shut the door, and Shiro stared at that, instead, feeling heat spreading from his chest up to his cheeks, and elsewhere, too.
The door slid open again. The towel was gone, and Keith was wearing a short-sleeved t-shirt that matched his pants.
"Better?" he asked.
"Uh… what?"
Keith laughed. He raised the back of his hand to Shiro's cheek, then yanked it away.
"Yikes," he said, blowing on his knuckles, teasing. "You're burning up."
"God, I love to see you laugh," Shiro blurted. "I could watch you laugh all day. I can't even remember the last time you…"
He trailed off, staring again, taking in Keith's wide-eyed expression. Then he kissed him, walking him backward into his quarters, groping at the wall for the door control. The door slid shut behind them, and Shiro went on kissing Keith's mouth, holding his face with both hands, thinking vaguely that he should try to hang on to some measure of restraint, feeling it start to slip, regardless. He exhaled when Keith pulled on his lower lip, giving in, opening his mouth for Keith's tongue, tasting something floral… Lavender? Rose? It was somewhere in between, faint and sweet and delicious. He slid his hands down Keith's chest and around to his lower back, pulling him closer-
"Mh-"
Keith paused mid-moan, breathing shallow, his arms locked tight around Shiro's shoulders.
"Sorry," Shiro murmured, blinking back at him. "It's… I… I just wanted to for so long…"
Keith nodded, smiling. "Me, too."
"I pictured it so many times," Shiro went on, aware of the fact that he'd let his filter slip, relishing the freedom of it. "And I never even got close. It's so much better than anything I imagined."
Keith tilted his head to one side.
"Shiro… are you a romantic?"
He laughed, stroking Keith's lower back with his thumb.
"I don't know. Maybe."
"I like it."
"I want to know everything you like."
Keith nodded. "I like it when you kiss me like that. And… like earlier."
Shiro moved one hand to pull the neckline of Keith's shirt to the side. He found a large red-and-purple bruise there, midway between his neck and left shoulder.
"Oh,"he breathed. "I… I didn't really mean to leave that much of a mark."
"I want you to leave marks all over me."
Shiro throbbed. He swallowed. He loosened his hold on Keith's waist.
"I want to. There are so many things I want to do. I'm just… I'm worried about what I could do, if I let my guard down."
"I know. I can wait, for as long as you need me to. Lance will, too. But you need to let us help you."
Shiro shook his head a little. "I don't know how."
"It's okay. We'll figure it out. Just don't shut us out, okay?"
"Okay."
Keith pressed his lips against his cheek, then took a step back from him, smoothing at his own still-damp hair.
"I think Lance is handling things pretty well so far," he said. "I still want to keep an eye on it, though. I think it's still hard for him to understand that he fits, with us."
Shiro nodded. "I agree. How do you want to handle it?"
"I think the two of you should spend some more time alone together, if you can. I mean, he knows you care about him, but I think it's going to take him some time to really believe it, you know?"
"Yeah. I do know. That's a good idea."
"And if we all decide to get closer… like, physically… I just want to make sure he feels included. Like earlier." He paused while a blush bloomed in his cheeks. "You were fucking spectacular today. With Lance, and… with me."
Shiro felt his heart leap into the back of his throat.
"Really?"
"Yes. I… I didn't know it could be like that."
"What? Sex?"
"Well, yeah, but I meant… love."
Shiro swallowed.
"Keith, I-"
"Shiro, listen-"
They both stopped, laughing a little.
"You first," Shiro said, and Keith nodded.
"So… I just needed to tell you…" He fidgeted with his hands, holding them in front of his stomach. "This thing with Lance… this whole bonding thing, or whatever it is… it doesn't change anything between you and me. You know that, right? I love you. More than ever."
Shiro nodded. "I know that. I love you, too." It felt so good to say, he found he wanted to say it again. He took hold of Keith's hand. "I love you." He pressed their foreheads together and closed his eyes. "I love you. So much, Keith." He felt Keith's breath on his lips when he exhaled. "I want to get close. I want to give you everything you deserve. It's just…"
"What?" Keith murmured. "What are you so afraid of?"
"Losing control. Hurting one of you. Doing something we'd all regret."
Keith hugged him. He pressed his cheek against Shiro's neck.
"What if I give you an order, Defender?"
Shiro smiled, smoothing his fingers through Keith's hair.
"I can go by the book for a worthy commander."
"Just me, then?"
"Mm. Just you."
"Okay. Listen carefully." Shiro shivered as Keith's lips brush against the outer shell of his ear. "You're going to go back to your quarters, and get in the shower, and touch yourself while you think about being with me and Lance. You don't have to come, but you do have to think about how much I want to put my mouth on you. Understood?"
Shiro moaned aloud. Keith's lips were on the back of his neck.
"Ah- Understood."
Shiro stared at himself in the mirror inside his bathroom. It was embedded in the wall – the Olkari had modified the composition of these rooms to suit their needs, based on the paladins' logs and records – and it was tall enough that he could see himself from head to toe.
Myself. It still felt strange, even thinking the word. Shiro ran his flesh-and-blood fingers through his silver fringe for the hundredth time, trying to understand the dissonant emotions it elicited. He could remember the way his mother had kissed his forehead when he was young… but it hadn't been this forehead. He could remember the dizzy thrill of tearing away from the ground on his very first flight… but that had been another heart, pounding away inside a different chest. He could remember the night he'd made love to Adam for the first time… but Adam had never touched this body, had never kissed this mouth, had never sighed in these arms. He knew these memories were his, that these experiences had helped to shape the person he was now. But the scars on this body had been manufactured, not earned. His body was gone – Gone forever – replaced by another that had been built, rather than born. His mind now lived inside a vessel that had never even set foot on Earth.
This realization had been horrifying. Shiro had stayed at Keith's bedside for hours after he'd woken up – after Keith had collapsed – digging his fingers into his thigh, pacing off and on to avoid a full-scale panic, frantic that this body might not do what bodies are supposed to do.
Could he still pilot a ship? Could he still run and jump and dodge and strike? Could he fight well enough to defend his teammates, or to save himself?
Could he still sing? Was he still ticklish along his inner thighs? Would he still hate the taste of spicy food, and crave chocolate ice cream? Could he still hold his breath under water, or make a three-point shot with a basketball? Would the ocean still smell the same, if he lived long enough to see it again?
Could he get aroused? Could he have an orgasm? Would he be able to make love to someone, ever again?
He had punished Keith for all this uncertainty. He knew that, now. He hadn't meant to, but it had been so much easier to try to remove himself from the equation than to face the reality of these questions all at once. He knew what Keith deserved, knew what experiences he wanted Keith to have, and he'd known for certain, then, that he was utterly unequipped to be the partner Keith was seeking.
But then, all of his questions had slowly started answering themselves. He did crave chocolate ice cream, still. He had battled the sentries in the simulation room with Keith by his side, and he'd actually enjoyed it. He had piloted a ship. He had helped save Olkarion from the Galra.
He had held Lance and Keith in his arms, had felt his body waking up as they shuddered and shook. He had kissed their lips and felt like a person again – had felt that, if he could figure out how to let them love this body, then maybe he could learn to love it, too.
And so, in this moment, he found he could accept the silver-white hair on his head – under his arms, on his lower stomach, between his legs – because it reminded him that he'd been given a second chance. He brushed his fingertips over the trail of short, smooth hair under his belly button, thinking that he'd put this off for long enough.
He stepped into the shower and let the water spill over his shoulders and back, exhaling slowly as it caressed and warmed his skin. He tipped his head backward and let the stream run over and through his hair, then reached for the rectangular bar of all-purpose soap the Olkari had crafted especially for their human guests. He lathered suds through the strands of his hair, enjoying the feeling of his fingers moving over his scalp, letting his mind wander to Lance's long-fingered hands. He had noticed them long before now, right around the time that he – or, more precisely, his clone – had first returned to the team.
He remembered thinking that Lance had grown so much in his absence. Shiro had always valued him as a team player and a skilled pilot, but he had started to think of him as a close friend at that time, too. Lance had seemed unfazed by his vulnerable state, and Shiro had been grateful for his cheerful optimism – though of course, he knew now, it had been concealing a deep well of concern and affection. They had spoken often, had even trained together a handful of times while Shiro had been regaining his strength.
And Shiro had started to notice his hands.
They were quick and strong in combat training, manipulating weapons or striking blows. They were deliberate and graceful, cradling a cup of tea over breakfast, two fingers tracing the lip of his mug. They were warm – Shiro remembered how they had felt on his body, resting briefly on his arm or his shoulder, hesitant, but reassuring. They were delicate and deadly all at once, like Lance himself was.
They were beautiful, like Lance himself was.
Shiro imagined that Lance's hands were in his hair instead of his own.
He held the image in his mind while he ran the soap over his chest and shoulders, enjoying the feeling of the suds and the fresh, clean smell, somewhere in the realm of mint and cocoa. He slid his hands around to his lower back and then downward, spreading the suds, lingering in places he hadn't dared to pay attention to before now. The lines and curves of his body felt comfortingly familiar, now that he was allowing himself to notice, and it was pleasant to be touched, even by himself.
He smoothed the soap over each of his legs next, then hesitated, breathing slowly, before he lathered suds over his stomach and spread them down from his belly button, through the patch of silver-white hair underneath, and over his cock. He finished the business of cleaning himself thoroughly before he finally held it in his hand, and then he set the soap aside, braced his prosthetic palm against the wall, and stroked.
The sensation registered, but just barely. It was a vaguely pleasant warmth, similar to the way it felt to be caressed along a less erogenous part of his body, like his shoulder, or the back of his neck. This was discouraging, but not wholly unexpected. He was still learning to link his mind and his emotions to the physical sensations this body could experience. He stroked twice more, with similar results. He sighed. "Vaguely pleasant" was not a description he'd ever dreamed of assigning to his sex life.
Right. Lance's hands. Let's start with that.
He called up the daydream again, imagining how Lance's fingers might feel if they were smoothing through his hair. Maybe Lance could stand behind him… No. Maybe Lance could press against him from behind while he held Keith against his chest-
You don't have to come, but you do have to think about how much I want to put my mouth on you. Understood?
That did it. He felt himself start to swell, remembering the way Keith had spoken to him, his voice barely a whisper, his calm confidence beyond intoxicating. At first, Shiro had found it surprising, too – he had never seen Keith engage in anything remotely resembling a romantic relationship before – but the more he thought about it, the more he realized how consistent it was with Keith's personality. He had always pursued his interests with a singular focus, achieving total mastery over any skill he cared to acquire. He kissed Shiro the way he flew a jet or piloted the black lion – confidently, a little recklessly, and masterfully, like he'd been born to do it-
"Ah-"
Shiro was fully hard now, his cock so sensitive that his hand shook a bit as he stroked, imagining that it was Keith's hand, instead, remembering what the inside of Keith's mouth had tasted like-
"Mh-"
He closed his eyes and bit down on his lower lip, succumbing to a dizzying tension that was both familiar and not, thinking about the way Lance's chest would feel if it was pressed against his bare back-
"Nh- ah- hah-"
He was stroking faster now, his heart rate climbing, his breathing shallow, then catching in his throat, then too shallow-
Fuck- No-
His lips were numb, his hand was unsteady, there was white light blooming against the black of his closed eyelids, he couldn't breathe-
Fuck- KEITH-
He gritted his teeth, holding his swollen, throbbing cock in his hand, frozen between arousal and panic-
I'm here. What's wrong?
He didn't bother trying to think in words. He just opened his mind like a floodgate.
You're fine, Shiro. Nothing bad is going to happen.
He felt a tug at the corners of his mind… and then he saw Lance staring back at him, through Keith's eyes.
See? We're right here.
Keith was calm and steady, and Shiro let himself be pulled into his mind without hesitation. He immediately felt Keith's affection spreading through his chest, down to his belly, outward to his fingertips… and then the feeling of his own, shuddering breaths receded while Keith's slow, measured ones took their place. He watched Lance's eyes, and the slow rise and fall of his shoulders, while Keith calmed the storm inside his mind.
I love you, he told Keith, as soon as he could find the words.
I love you, too.
"You're beautiful," he told Lance, using Keith's voice. "Shiro said that, but I think so, too."
Lance smiled. "If I kiss you right now, will I be kissing you, or Shiro?"
"Both," Keith and Shiro said.
He nodded.
"Good."
Their lips pressed together. Shiro leaned into the kiss with his whole being, and so Keith did, too. They smoothed their fingers through Lance's hair. They pulled suggestively at his lower lip. They tasted his tongue, then mouthed under his chin, then pressed their faces against his neck-
"Oh-"
Lance smelled incredible, like citrus and salt, like sunlight, like home-
"Oh, whoa-"
"Keith?" Lance was holding his face with both hands. "You okay?"
"Yeah, it's – oh – it's Shiro-"
Shiro was stroking himself again, his own arousal mirrored in Keith's body and mind, his doubts and fears and inhibitions gone. He barely paused to take in the blush in Lance's cheeks before he buried his face against his neck again, kissing and nipping at his skin, sliding his arms around his back, pulling him closer-
"Ah-"
Lance's quiet whimpering set his nerve endings on fire. He was surrounded by the sound of his voice, by the smell of his skin. He was bucking against his hand with warm water running down his back. He was sucking on Lance's neck with Keith's mouth. He was alive. He was someone. He was theirs-
"Keith- ah- Shiro-"
He was theirs. He came all over the shower wall, the force of it coursing through his body like a current, while Keith sagged and shuddered in Lance's arms.
He felt Lance's fingers smoothing through his hair.
He felt something rough and crumbling against his prosthetic palm.
He opened his eyes and found a spiderweb of cracks in the stone wall of the shower, radiating outward from his artificial hand.
No…
He pulled his hand away and set dust swirling in the steamy air, while shards of stone fell away from the imprint he'd left in the wall.
Fuck! I knew it… I knew… I can't do this, shouldn't've even tried-
Hey, Keith nudged, inside his mind. Shiro. Stop. One step at a time, okay?
Shiro scowled at nothing in particular. Keith was developing a talent for turning his words around on him.
Don't think that face at me. You just had a mind-blowing orgasm. Can we just bask, for a minute?
No. It's not safe. I'm not safe-
"Hey!" Keith yelled aloud. "There's nothing safe about any of this! It's all a risk, in a million different ways. We know this is hard for you. We've accepted that. We're not giving up, so you can't either."
Shiro groaned in frustration.
"I can't do this! I can't risk hurting you!"
"Listen to me, Shiro," Keith commanded. "YOU are the one who's going to be in pain if you don't quit spiraling. I'm gonna come down there and knock you on your ass if you don't cut it out and start trusting us."
Shiro closed his eyes, let his shoulders drop, and let the air out of his lungs.
"Yes, Sir."
"Good. Get dressed and get your ass to the game room. We're going to have some fucking fun tonight. Understood?"
Shiro smiled.
"Understood."
