A/N: Drama alert!


"This is ridiculous" April thought as she rolled over in the huge hotel bed. Jackson had refused to leave her in Paris alone, but they absolutely weren't on speaking terms. April could tell that she'd really done it this time; however, she meant what she said. The only bad thing was that she missed her husband so much it was sickening. It could've driven her to drink.

Meanwhile, Jackson was in the adjoining room trying to sleep as well. It took all he had to not walk in there, cave in and have everything be all right. He couldn't do that until he figured out what it was he wanted... Did he want to adopt Finnley? Did he want to adopt at all? It was one of the most frustrating things he had ever experienced.

"I'm going to the hospital. You coming?" April was still trying to sound firm as she stood in the doorway.

Jackson sat up as quickly as he possibly could, startled by her sudden appearance. He was surprised that she still wanted him to come with her but it gave him hope that not all was lost just yet. He nodded as he jumped up and got dressed in record time. Hopefully they could talk during the drive over there and he could talk some sense into her.

"Thanks for not leaving me here alone." She said as the taxi pulled out of the hotel entrance.

Jackson looked over at her, "I would never leave you to deal with anything alone," he assured her. "Now, about Finnley-" he began but was interrupted by April.

"Jackson I'm not changing my mind. You're either in or out. If you're out I suggest you start looking for apartments when we get home."

Okay, so this was going to take more than a few words of common sense. April was far too determined for him to just talk her out of it. "I'm not out, but I'm also not in. I don't know if I can commit to this yet so just give me a few days to get used to the idea," he told her. "I'm not saying no but I want to be sure about my final decision."

"Damn it. Jackson, if you weren't sure about this than why did you lie to me! You led me to believe this was something you wanted to do; now that we are you're abandoning me? To hell with you!"

"I never lied to you; I never said that I wanted to adopt him! I was concerned about him and I helped look after him and it's not my fault if you interpreted from that that I want to adopt him! We arrived in Paris two days ago, that's how long we've known Finnley, and now you're expecting me to accept him as my son just like that?!" He asked her, snapping his fingers. "Can't you see how crazy that is?"

"Screw you! Now you're calling my emotions crazy? Tell me the truth Jackson; were you planning on staying with your barren wife or did this family detour give you an excuse to go back and sleep with your girlfriend as soon as we hit American soil?" April knew that was harsh but she was so angry. Not with him but at herself. Why wasn't she able to give him kids? Finnley was the only chance she would get to be a mother. She realized although it hurt she was willing to do this alone.

Jackson's jaw dropped as he looked at her in shock, he couldn't believe she had seriously said that to him. "You really expect that from me? You think that little of me? I've been wondering if I wanted to have kids, if I wanted to adopt, but knowing that that's what you think of me and that you trust me that little the real question should be if I want to have kids with you!" He told her as they pulled up to the hospital.


April couldn't believe she'd said those things. She didn't mean them. Her feelings were hurt yes, but she didn't mean to push Jackson away. She know she'd hurt him. They were sitting right across from each other in the hospital cafeteria and he wouldn't even look at her. Never in a million years did she think she'd be choosing between her husband and a child. What made it worse was it was more of an internal conflict than an external one.

They had gone to see Finnley for a little while and Jackson had noticed that even he had felt the tension. Jackson cleared his throat and threw April a quick glance, not sure if he should something. When they got married he had been so sure that they could work through anything; that seemed pretty naïf now. He was about to break the silence between them when April beat him to it.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean what I said… I was angry. I know you'd never cheat on me-" April wanted to continue but Jackson interrupted her. She could still hear the hurt in his voice.

"You're right; I would never do that, ever! And just because we're fighting about something doesn't give you the right to accuse me of that," Jackson told her. "But I think that we need to move on from that and focus on what this was really all about."

"Okay. I'm open to that."

Jackson nodded, "okay," he told her as he sat back a little - able to relax a bit. "I know you've grown... Attached to Finnley, but I just don't think we should do this."

"I want to do this babe. I understand that you're not okay with this and I get that. I understand what I'm doing is irrational but... I think I really do love him. What I also know is you didn't sign up for this. I think we need to agree to separate for a while. It's obvious you're not going to be happy with my decision. I want you to be. God, I want you to be. I want a family with you. But I love you too much to force you and take away the happiness that we had. I want a legal separation Jackson."

He could feel his heart breaking as he listened to what she was telling him, "maybe that's best for now." He told her. "Just take some time apart and we can see what happens."

"Exactly, and in a few months we'll talk okay? In the mean time, I think you should leave. I have money and I can get things straightened out at the hospital over the phone. I'll call you in a few days, alright?"

Jackson looked at her, slightly shocked, "you don't want to have any contact for a couple of months?" He asked her, hoping he had misunderstood somehow.

"Go back home, take care of patients, run the board. Jackson we know that if you stay here, all we'll do is fight and make things worse with sex afterward. Remember that promise you made me the night we eloped? You promised we wouldn't end up a marriage casualty of Grey Sloan. Don't you want to keep that promise?"

"Of course I don't want to get a divorce, that's why I want to be with you and have you on my side. How can we be in this together if you're here and I'm back home?" He asked her.

"Jackson, please don't do this. We can get through anything. Just give us both time okay?"

He let out a sigh, "I can't believe we went from going on our honeymoon to this," he told her. "I just need to know one more thing," he added after a few seconds but then hesitated to continue.

"Anything." She said before swallowing hard.

"Will anything have changed?" He asked her. "We can spend months apart but in the end you'll still want to adopt Finnley and I won't... Are you really willing to risk our marriage over this one kid?"

April felt herself beginning to cry. She walked closer to Jackson and pulled him in for one last kiss. After what seemed like hours she pulled away. "I love you so much." She then walked away leaving his question unanswered.


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