In the previous episode, the Academy makes its move. In response to the Ambassadors' interest in the Thirteenth Ark, Noel, Fang and Lieutenant Strike set off to rescue Snow; meanwhile, Vanille is left to watch over a seemingly unconscious Hope. Though Snow is successfully recovered, the party falls at the hand of Gregor. Now in captivity, Noel faces an unavoidable truth, for Snow does not yet know of his fiancée's fate….


Crystal Fortresses
Two men seeking to save the future, driven by the burdens of their past: Perhaps they had more in common than Hope once thought.

Episode 11: The Price of Salvation


For a moment, there was nothing but darkness and silence.

Hope doubted his surroundings were truly either of these, but the moment felt forever and he did not awaken. The feeling was familiar, yet not: a dark sleep. Any thought he entertained was not retained for very long. Where am I now, Hope would ask himself, but then the thought would leave him in favor of other questions that would also remain unanswered: Where was Titan, Where did Noel go, Why is it so quiet, Am I dreaming

Had Hope been dreaming? His travels with Noel on Gran Pulse were a blur to him, and that much he knew hadn't been a dream. But meeting Titan, the impulsive gamble he had made — were they just figments of his imagination, or had they actually occurred? What if he were still on Gran Pulse alongside Noel? What if he had only blacked out from overexertion and would soon awaken from a dream? Still, wherever Hope was now, he could no longer hear Noel's voice, and even in a dream world it gave him reason for momentary concern.

Hope did regain consciousness, eventually. He was greeted with a harsh brightness, in stark contrast to the gloom of Gran Pulse's skies, and it caused him to keep his eyes closed for a moment longer. How he had not woken up from the brightness before now was beyond him, but more important was the observation that he could not possibly be on Gran Pulse anymore. He had to be back on Bhunivelze, there was no way it could be this bright down on Gran Pulse — though, there was still the possibility that he were aboard an airship, which Hope doubted; after a moment's pause to test that possibility Hope did not hear the roaring of an engine and concluded he was not on an airship and therefore had to be on Bhunivelze.

Slowly Hope rose to a seated position. His body felt sore, as if he had not moved for days. Then, as he rubbed at his eyes and once more attempted to adjust to his surroundings, a voice called to him:

"Hope! You're awake!"

Hope did not need to guess to whom the voice belonged. He had heard that voice recently, if only in his dreams; in his slow start Hope did not immediately register that he was not living a dream this time, or that it was actually hundreds and hundreds of years since he'd last heard that voice.

"Vanille?" Sure enough, Vanille was seated across the room, her head raised to him. For a moment their eyes met and neither moved, as if both were questioning their reality. Then, at last, Vanille sprang up from her seat with a wide, elated grin. Hope could not keep the grin off his face, either: This really was Vanille, in the flesh, and she was no longer in crystal stasis. It was confirmation that what he'd done really hadn't been a dream.

Hope stood up to greet Vanille, but the moment he was on his feet Vanille suddenly gasped and came to a stop. He, too, faltered, caught between surprise and confusion. Hope had not expected this reaction, in the midst of what should have been a warm reunion. Had he done something wrong? Was there something off about his appearance? He had fully expected Vanille to be overflowing with gladness to see him, without reservation, just as he was overjoyed to see her.

No, she was happy to see him, she was just holding back — but why? Was she already aware of what he'd done?

Hope's euphoria was quickly leaving him, but before Hope could ask Vanille raised her head once more, and though her smile returned to her she made no acknowledgment of what had just happened.

"Are you okay?" she asked. Hope fought the urge to return the question. He was puzzled by Vanille's hesitance. Vanille, meanwhile, took a step back and allowed her hands to slip behind her back, bowing her head apologetically before continuing. "Everyone's been so worried — Noel especially, oh Hope, if only you knew — and no one's got a clue what happened, not even Noel. He says he found you unconscious."

Hope nodded, as if to agree, but he was barely registering her words. His mind was pondering over something else….

"Hope, you're not listening!" Vanille whined, and Hope broke into soft laughter. It had been forever since he'd seen her pout, forever since he'd last teased —

"You're not in crystal stasis!" Hope exclaimed, as if it had only just occurred to him, though subconsciously he'd already come upon this observation. Vanille had been in crystal stasis. Had been. And here she was now, standing before him, as well and as youthful as he'd known her from his childhood. Vanille was no longer in crystal stasis, and as Hope continued to recover from his slow start he repeated this thought until he could properly understand it himself.

"I'm really not dreaming, am I?"

"Not quite," replied Vanille, "Though, you do sound surprised. Wasn't that what you set out to do?"

"Yeah… hey, that reminds me!" and without another word Hope stepped forward and took Vanille into his arms. He ignored her delighted squeal and her gasp of surprise; he knew she understood, that he was not only fulfilling a promise but also confirming for himself that she was really there with him, no longer crystal. He suspected it wasn't the first hug Vanille had received since having awakened, there was no doubt in Hope's mind that Fang had beaten him to that feat, but a promise was a promise and Hope intended to keep it.

Vanille offered him a soft smile once he pulled away, after Hope had made up for all the times Vanille consoled him in the past, and a soft I missed you was exchanged between them. But when she stepped back again her smile faded, and her expression hardened from the seriousness of her following question:

"Hope, what did happen?"

Hope shook his head.

"To be honest," he said, "I wouldn't know where to start."

Hope had a feeling Vanille would ask, and he suspected many others after her would question him, too. Was it that Vanille actually didn't know, or was it that she already knew and was only trying to get him to admit it out loud? Truthfully Hope would be surprised if it were the former, as every time he'd met Vanille within a dream she seemed very aware of everything occurring beyond her crystal statue. Perhaps her sense of the world had diminished once

"Your Brand," said Hope, snapping his fingers and ignoring the question at hand as he was reminded of a sudden thought. "Is it gone?"

Up until this point, Hope had assumed that being released from crystal stasis meant being human once more, and he did not consider the possibility that she might still be a l'Cie. (Though, Hope reminded himself after the fact, when he first met Vanille she'd been released from crystal stasis as a l'Cie, not a human.) But Vanille was able to dispel his worries, and after a quick flash of her hip Hope was certain nothing was there except skin.

"Thank you," added Hope, his gaze pointedly turned away. Vanille only laughed softly in response, oblivious to the repercussions of her actions. "So, you're not a l'Cie anymore. You can finally live your life normally again, right?"

"Not yet," said Vanille. "If you ask me, I wouldn't say this is quite a time to be living normally. And hey! You didn't answer my question!"

"What question?"

"Hope! I'm being serious, here." Vanille sighed, crossing arms over her chest. Hope couldn't help but to smile: it was a very Vanille sort of reaction. "No one knows what happened, not even Noel. One moment you're both out seeking Pulse, the next moment you're unconscious and we've been freed from crystal stasis? Something must've happened."

"Noel's here?" asked Hope, peering over Vanille's shoulder. He wondered if Noel had also blacked out at the Faultwarrens, if Noel had been unconscious for as long as he'd been.

Well, maybe not for as long as I'd been, Hope told himself. Noel had been awake long enough to have already conversed with Vanille.

"Where is he?"

"Oh," said Vanille, "I see. So you're more interested in him than me."

"Vanille, that's not… I…." Hope wasn't sure if Vanille was teasing him or if she was legitimately hurt by where Hope's concerns lay. "I just want to know if he's okay."

"He's fine, don't worry about him. He's pretty tough. Now, enough about Noel for a second, Hope. Tell me what happened? I have something to tell you, too… but only if you speak first!"

Hope sighed in defeat. There really was no going around this, was there? On the one hand, Hope was scared for what Vanille might think of him. He had made many promises to her when they'd met in his dreams — how many of those, now, had he broken? He didn't want to disappoint Vanille again, he only wanted to make her smile… yet as Hope thought on it, she was the only one he could tell. Hope trusted her, he knew she would listen to him unconditionally, he knew she would support him through the end. Between her and Noel… no, Hope could not tell Noel, not now.

"You can't tell anyone," whispered Hope, and only after he had her confirmation did he close his eyes and begin to recall his encounter with Pulse. He only briefly touched on the many days he'd spent wandering with Noel, how they had sought out fal'Cie in hopes of finding Pulse; he did not mention his failures with Bismarck and Atomos. So, Hope began with the Faultwarrens: meeting Titan, Titan's riddles, and when everything became dark.


Hope felt as if he were floating. His mind was blank, he felt light-headed. Darkness surrounded him, he could no longer see the ground or the skies of Gran Pulse. It was as if he'd entered a dream, except Hope was sure if he had not lost consciousness.

But slowly it came back to him, and as his surroundings began to materialize he found himself face to face with a familiar yet terrifying sight: Before him, now, was Pulse.

Now that he was in Pulse's presence, Hope could say he recognized Pulse. Even if Pulse's appearance was still quite frightening— Pulse had to be more than a hundred times Hope's size, and his half-covered face and his massive size only added to his overall image — Hope was somehow not as overwhelmed this time, not as panicked as he remembered being. He was no longer a scared fourteen-year-old in grief, he had come in expecting this encounter. Yet, when Pulse spoke, or when Hope was sure Pulse had spoken, Hope shuddered in trepidation.

'You are a fool.'

Pulse was speaking to him, though Hope heard nothing, as if he just knew what was being said to him, even when nothing was really being said at all. Hope spun around, his body flailing in midair as he turned. Where was he? — never mind that, where was Noel? He looked everywhere, but there was no sight of —

'You are alone.'

Alone. It was a terrifying word, yet Hope had come to know it well. When his mother had passed, he had been alone. When the four surviving l'Cie were freed from crystal stasis, he was the only one not reunited with his family, and he had been alone. When his friends began disappearing from the timeline and left him behind, he'd been alone. When Alyssa had betrayed him, when Snow had whisked him off into the future… alone.

And now… Noel was gone. In his resolve to save his friends, when Hope no longer wanted the backseat, when he no longer wanted to be left behind…. Alone. Again.

'You are a fool.'

Hope opened his mouth to speak, but no words came to him.

'What is it you want? We have once branded you. Are you as foolish as the other to seek it again?'

Still, Hope was unable to reply. It was only then Hope understood that Pulse's 'voice' must be in his head, that to talk to Pulse would be to speak to himself.

'I'm not trying to become a l'Cie.'

'Then what? What business do you seek with us? Do you also act on a dream? The other acted on the words of Etro's warrior, and now he rests in crystal. Is that the fate you seek?'

'No. I want to free everyone from crystal.' Had they been conversing aloud, Hope might not have had the nerve to speak so brazenly. For all he knew, and with no one to tell him otherwise, it could all have just been in his head. Perhaps they really weren't conversing at all, perhaps Hope would wake up to nothing more than a

'You also live in a dream. You wish to save those doomed to fate. You are arrogant. You assume everything is possible, that everything is under your control. Only when you realize you are not in control do you turn to your origins — your god.'

'That's not true.' If Hope had thought to turn to Pulse earlier, he would have. Hope had spent his whole life trying to find a way to save Vanille and Fang, a list that later grew to include his mother, Light, Serah, and now Snow. It had nothing to do with doing it himself. It had everything to do with saving his friends from a fate they did not deserve, by whatever means. They had all lost themselves trying to do some good for the world. Hope would, too.

'We have read your heart. You have spoken. But your petty wishes do not concern us.'

'Then why did you do it for Snow?' Right. Hadn't Vanille told him this? That Pulse and his fal'Cie did not concern themselves with the affairs of mankind? Why had they listened to Snow?

'The other was bestowed the blessing of Etro. He acted upon the orders of Etro's warrior, one who guards Etro's Gate. Complying with his requests takes us closer to the awaited day.'

Blessing of Etro… the ability to travel through time? — and it was the second time Pulse had mentioned Etro's warrior. Could he mean…?

Hope's heart was racing. Light was alive! The days he'd spent in despair were but a distant memory. He was so close to the truth, now. If only he could reach out just a little further….

'The awaited day is nigh. We have caught a glimpse of Etro's Gate, but it has been denied to us.'

Etro's gate? — then Hope remembered the task that had been assigned to Pulse, to seek out the door to the Unseen Realm. Surely that didn't mean —

'Enough. Leave now, human. We will spare you humiliation. Do not remove us from our Focus.'

'No, wait!' Hope panicked. He couldn't lose this chance, not when he was so close! He'd already learned so much! To where would he turn otherwise? How else could he save his friends? He refused to believe it was impossible, not when he'd come so far…

Where was Noel? Where was Noel now that he needed him the most? — he had been with him until now, hadn't he? Noel had stood by his side, Noel had hugged him when he felt most alone, Noel had cheered him up when he had plunged into defeat. But now that his resoluteness needed to be most firm, where had he gone? Was Noel experiencing a similar encounter?

Hope thought of Light, as best he could picture her from the images of the Oracle Drive. He thought of Vanille's smile, Fang's courage, Snow's perseverance, Serah's compassion, his mother's love… He thought of the mythological texts he'd read, searching for something to latch onto. He thought of Noel's kind eyes, Noel's physical presence, Noel himself….

'I'll make you a deal, Pulse.'

Part of Hope was acting out of desperation. Part of him was improvising. Part of him was hoping his instincts and interpretations were correct, even though the details were only just forming in his mind. Hope knew it would be the biggest gamble of his life.

'Light is Etro's warrior, isn't she? You say she's denied you Etro's Gate — it's the same reason our world hasn't been consumed by Valhalla, isn't it? Light did something to keep Valhalla from merging with our world, and that's exactly why you still haven't found Etro's Gate.

'Light's waiting for the right time. When all of Pulse's children have gathered — children you marked centuries ago by your brand — that's when she'll awake. She knows only then will she have the strength to fulfill her duties.'

'What do you propose?'

Hope gulped. This was it.

'Free everyone. Snow, Fang and Vanille. Barthandelus had that power, as did Etro. I know you can, too. In turn, Light will wake from her sleep, and you will have your Gate.'

'You would willingly hand over your world to us?'

Hope nodded. It wasn't that he was choosing his friends over the world. It was that he trusted them enough that, when they banded together, they would be able to protect the world from Pulse, Lindzei, and whoever else stood in their way.

As for protecting the world from Valhalla? — Hope overlooked the thought. As did Pulse, but that wasn't his concern.

'Fal'cie act out of obligation to their Focus, and humans act out of self-interest. I am not so foolish as Etro. What price are you willing to pay? By what means can you convince me of your deal?'

Price…? Hope feared the word. Pulse had taken his life away from him once — that Hope was here before him making a gamble was indeed a sign of his foolishness. Hope knew Pulse was capable of many things, and he was fearful for what a deity might demand.

'We have read your heart, and your pleas intrigue us. We make but one deal. We will free your friends from crystal stasis, all those whom you've kept in your heart, and your price is your life. We will brand you again as our own.

'Should the warrior not relinquish the Gate, you will suffer a fate worse than those for whom you care. Should the warrior give that which we seek, you will be reunited in whatever turmoil befalls this world.'

So that was it, then. In the end, after the promises he'd made to Vanille and to Noel, the price of salvation of his friends was to be his own life.

What was Hope to say? He had begged for this chance, and now that he had struggled through and was finally faced with what he'd spent his whole life fighting for, he was at a loss. In freeing Vanille, Fang and Snow — and Light too, Hope was sure — he would be dooming himself.

Hope was being handed everything he'd ever wanted.

Why was he faltering?

Was it because he feared death? — but he wouldn't die just yet, he'd still have his chance to help save the world. And if the world were already doomed, if he didn't accept Pulse's terms, he'd simply die without trying.

Was it because of the promises he'd made on the way? — but if becoming a l'Cie meant having easier access to his magic, wouldn't that make him more useful? It was so easy to make blind promises, but now that his dreams were a reality dangling before his face… what if it really were the only way to save everyone?

'Choose quickly. Your hesitation calls to us.'

Vanille would be disappointed in him. Noel would be disappointed in him. Hope had not come to become a l'Cie. Yet he would never get this chance again — and hadn't Vanille been the one to tell him to take opportunities as they came, lest he regret it forever?

The clock was ticking. Hope needed to decide fast. He thought about Noel, how it would kill him to have to tell Noel his decision, especially now that he knew about Noel's fear of watching him die. Hope would be disappointing the person who had brought him here — and without Noel, Hope would never have made it this far. But as Hope thought on it, and as Pulse continued to pressure him toward a decision, he found himself unable to keep his promises to Noel any longer.

He thought about Fang, Vanille and Light, who each had given up her life for the sake of the world.

Then he thought about Serah and Yeul, who did not get that choice.

And then, his mind was properly set.


Noel awoke to a start.

The past few hours had been in this fashion, with Noel phasing in and out of consciousness. Bound to a wall of a dimly lit jail cell, Noel hadn't had many options available to him; after the first warning given to them, everyone had kept conversation to a relative minimum, and in turn they were not bothered by the guards watching over their cell. Because of this silence, Noel had been able to get some rest, albeit rather uncomfortably.

However, the silence was now broken. Noel was roused by a man's sudden shouting:

"Lemme outta here!"

"Shut the hell up and behave like the others!" was the sharp reply, which was then followed by the lashing of a whip and Snow's pained outburst; Noel cringed inwardly, though he did not make any noise. It seemed Snow had finally woken up and, having just become aware of his captivity, was beginning to cause unwanted commotion. Why did Noel not find Snow's ruckus surprising? Noel was beginning to wonder if —

Serah.

The sudden thought blindsided Noel. His chest grew heavy: He still needed to tell Snow what had happened. Just when Noel thought he'd come to terms with Serah's death, guilt and regret were biting at him once more. Snow had trusted him to protect Serah, and he had failed him.

No, there was no avoiding it, now. Snow needed to know. Only then would Noel have proper closure.

But when? But how?

"Just couldn't keep your mouth shut, could ya?" Fang was now saying, prompting Noel to return to reality. Snow was still groaning from the pain; at first, Noel had not expected the soldiers on duty to forcibly silence Snow by means of violence, though the more he thought on it the more it seemed less surprising. Meanwhile, images of Serah's lifeless body on Hope's bed were resurfacing in the back of his mind, as if in painful reminder of his obligation at hand.

"All right, all right," mumbled Snow through gritted teeth. "Lesson learned. So, where are we, anyway? How long have we been here?"

"Who knows how long," said Fang. Noel presumed Fang and Snow were not yet aware of his consciousness, as neither were addressing him. "You sure took your sweet time waking up, 've been hanging out here for some time now. Dunno where the ground is, but we're pretty far up the wall. If you got anything on you, try dropping something to see how far up we are?"

There was a brief pause before Snow continued, "Who else is here? Did we all get caught? I can't see a damned thing."

"Yep, looks like it. You, me, Noel, and the Lieutenant." At these words, Noel turned his head slightly to the Lieutenant. Noel could tell he was awake, though the Lieutenant also appeared to be keeping quiet. Noel continued to do the same, keeping his head bowed; he did not want to interrupt Fang's conversation with Snow, but he was also not ready to face Snow.

Snow spoke next. "But hey, I missed the party! When did you and Vanille break free from crystal stasis? — Vanille too, right? That's really great… I told Noel I'd be sure to introduce him to you if I got the chance, but looks like you're already acquainted?"

"Yeah." Fang paused; Noel, whose head was bowed, neither opened his eyes nor turned to Fang to see what had caused her to grow silent. "We woke up some time ago. Can't really remember the number of days anymore, it's all been a bit of a blur. We had to sit through medical examinations, but for the most part we're both fine. Our Brands are gone.

"We met Noel for the first time, not long after. He was carrying Hope unconscious in his arms, Noel had no explanation for it. That doctor woman, forget her name, told us Noel and Hope had set out looking for Pulse… no one's sure if they ever succeeded, not even Noel."

"But you're not crystal anymore," reasoned Snow. "Noel's a dependable guy, I'm sure whatever it was that they did was done right."

Noel was gutted upon hearing Snow's compliments. If only Snow knew the truth: he wasn't dependable, not at all. He couldn't even protect Serah as he'd been asked….

"Who knows? Noel can't even say what happened. Only Hope knows, but he's still out cold. I'm willing to bet his unconsciousness is linked to whatever he did that set me and Vanille free." As Noel listened to Fang's words, he began to wonder for himself: Was Hope still unconscious, even now? Had Hope really met Pulse, or had Hope only spoken with Titan? Once more he was reminded of all his questions that continued to remain unanswered, questions he'd forced himself to leave behind when he set off with Fang and the Lieutenant. But now that he was captive here, bound to a wall in a dark room, Noel had nothing to entertain him but Fang's conversation and his thoughts.

Noel grew anxious. What had Hope done? Would Hope ever wake up? Had he really failed to protect Hope, just as he'd failed to save Yeul and Serah?

Serah.

The thought of her only continued to eat at him. Noel needed to tell Snow soon….

Fang continued, "Long story short, Noel proposed we rescue you before you fell into enemy hands again. He trusted you would be able to put up a fight on your own. Met him before, have you?"

"Yeah, he and Serah got me out of a tight spot at the Sunleth Waterscape." There, Snow had said it, he had mentioned Serah's name. Any moment now, Snow would ask him where Serah was…. "What about Lightning? Is she safe?"

"Afraid I haven't heard anything on her. I must've woken up right about when you did. I only had the benefit of listening to the well-informed, but I'm afraid even I don't know everything yet. You, on the other hand, landed yourself in enemy hands. Turned to crystal, did ya? How do you figure that one?"

"Can't explain it myself," said Snow in the casual tone he always used. Even now, Noel didn't like it much. "But hey, I'm back in action and raring to go!"

"Back in action my ass, you're tied to a wall." Fang scoffed, her voice dripping with disapproval. "Trying to get yourself killed, eh? Becoming a l'Cie, what were you thinking?"

"Some things, you just gotta do."

"Yeah? — Well, I guess I could agree with that. But… no use fussing over it now. Vanille and I've not got our Brands. You're not a l'Cie anymore either, are you?"

Snow did not reply immediately. Noel strained his ears to listen harder, Snow's hesitation having caught his interest. Noel had asked himself this, too. Gregor had referred to Snow as the l'Cie, but Noel assumed Gregor was merely misinformed. After all, what would Gregor know, except that Snow had once been the crystal he'd procured at Port Dexum? But then, if Snow were still a l'Cie while Fang and Vanille had lost their Brands, what had Hope accomplished? Whatever arrangement Hope had made, was Snow exempt from it?

Snow's response did little to appease Noel's wandering thoughts.

"Funny, I haven't thought to check. Remind me to check when we get outta here."

"You can't be serious?" asked Fang in disbelief, perhaps a little too loudly. Noel wondered if the soldiers on duty would berate them….

Snow, it seemed, was quite serious. "Hey! I was too busy staying alive! But, I'm pretty sure I'm still a l'Cie. I don't think even someone like me would have survived this long if I weren't a l'Cie anymore. It's funny, actually. I had this dream, you know? Right before I woke up, it was like I asked to stay a l'Cie for a little longer. Can't really explain it, but…."

"Is that all you remember from that dream?" asked Noel, the words escaping him before he could stop himself. Well, so much for his cover. As both Fang and Snow turned to acknowledge him, Noel continued. "You think you had that dream about the same time Hope and I encountered Titan?"

"Nice of you to join us," Fang said offhandedly before turning on Snow. "But I got the same question. You think that dream has anything to do with you still being a l'Cie despite Vanille and I losing our Brands? You think someone was actually giving you the choice?"

"I… think so? It's pretty hazy, had that dream quite some time ago. Had I known I was going to be tested on it, I would've thought to remember more." Snow chuckled, as if amused by a joke, before turning to Noel. "Now that there's no one after our backs, I can talk to you properly. I heard about Hope, you think he's okay? And hey, where's Serah? She back with Hope?"

There. Snow had finally mentioned Serah. But how to tell him without causing too much disturbance? — not that Snow was wrong to react to news about his fiancée, but Noel did not want to draw the attention of the soldiers on duty, especially not after they had already exhibited earlier signs of violence. Noel did want to take responsibility for what had happened to Serah, while at the same time making it clear that her passing was something he could not have prevented. But would Snow listen to him long enough?

Perhaps in an attempt to buy himself some time to think, Noel chose to first talk about Hope.

"I haven't heard any news on Hope since we left. I doubt we'll be hearing anything new until we get out of this mess. As for — "

"I wouldn't push our luck," Fang interjected, before Noel could segue into the subject of Serah. "We're headed toward public execution. I don't fancy being killed, so we might want to 'get out of this mess' sooner rather than later."

"Yeah, but you got any ideas?"

"I've got one," Lieutenant Strike said coolly. All heads turned to him, as if they were only just reminded of his presence. "But you're going to have to play along."

"Play along? Sure thing, Pops, what d'you got?" Noel was also curious, but the Lieutenant did not elaborate further, choosing instead to reprimand Snow for his choice in nicknames. The Lieutenant, it seemed, was sensitive about his age. Noel wondered why the Lieutenant had only now chosen to propose an escape route, considering they'd already spent several hours being held captive, but he quickly reasoned Lieutenant Strike had likely been waiting for Snow to wake up.

After the Lieutenant made it clear that he would not be disclosing the details of his plans, and once the four agreed to play along, the Lieutenant began to curse loudly, uttering obscenities Noel thought to be highly uncharacteristic of his former superior. Figuring this outburst to be what he was meant to be 'playing along' with, Noel did not voice any of his concerns.

"Are you mad?" Snow hissed, but the Lieutenant ignored him and did not relent in his shouting, not even as one of the soldiers reentered their room. Noel heard the snapping of a whip against the wall, as if in an attempt to quash the ruckus, but what was meant to be a threat only caused the Lieutenant's anger to swell.

"Get me the hell outta here!"

"What the hell's going on?" snapped the soldier as he cracked his whip again. The Lieutenant did not seem the least bit intimidated.

"You tell me!" shouted back the Lieutenant. "Why the hell am I locked up with these criminals?" At these words Snow protested once more, appearing to have forgotten the meaning of the words play along, and though his shouting was rather incomprehensible he began to yell at the Lieutenant for his name calling; Noel, meanwhile, was caught in the midst of what appeared to be a shouting match, and as he silently watched the three men shout at each other Noel started to wonder if this was really what the Lieutenant had in mind.

"Don't try to fool me! You're a lieutenant of the Academy's militia! I have every order to watch over you and your lot until we arrive!"

"You dimwit, I'm not some lieutenant, I'm Gregor's brother!"

"Y-You're what, n-now?" cried the soldier, though these words of shock could have come from anyone. Noel had certainly not expected this much. A quick glance around the room told Noel that Fang and Snow were just as lost as he was.

"Ulhelm Strigor… Strigor for short. You got the wrong man, untie me at once!" The soldier was clearly overwhelmed by the situation and seemed to not know whether to believe the Lieutenant, and the longer he worried himself over his course of action the louder the Lieutenant continued to yell. Noel had no idea how far to believe his once-superior's tale. Was the Lieutenant really related to Gregor, or was it a bluff to help them escape? If it were the latter, Noel would have to compliment the Lieutenant later for his quick thinking.

After a few moments the soldier appeared to have come to a decision and started to prepare for Lieutenant Strike's release. Noel silently noted the soldier's ineptness: Had there even been an attempt to radio his superiors for clarification? Had the soldier simply taken the Lieutenant's word as truth? What if Gregor didn't have a brother? Besides, the four of them had been brought here directly from their fight with Gregor, so how could there have even been that mix up?

Noel wasn't complaining, though. It was a stroke of luck that the Lieutenant's plan had worked, even if only the Lieutenant was being let go at the moment, and now that the Lieutenant appeared to have thought up more than a mere shouting match Noel found himself more able to trust in him. Now, there was definitely a chance they would be able to escape before public execution became a reality.

What happened next, Noel wasn't so sure. One moment the Lieutenant was being released, the next moment a shrill cry filled the room, and still after that Noel was being set free from his restraints. Despite the surprise factor and his previous altitude, Noel landed soundly on his feet, and he was soon joined by Fang and Snow, the latter turning on the Lieutenant upon his landing.

"What the hell was that?" demanded Snow; Noel had similar thoughts, but he did not voice them. The Lieutenant only raised a hand to silence him, but it was too late: within moments several more soldiers burst through the door, shouting jailbreak. Noel reached for his dual swords, only to realize he'd been disarmed; Fang and Snow, who appeared to have already come to this realization (though, in Snow's case, his fists were his weapon. weren't they?), responded immediately, and it wasn't long of a fist fight before both soldiers fell to the ground, unconscious.

"We need to move," said Lieutenant Strike quickly, turning to the bodies that now lay motionless. "He'll come around soon, probably alert someone. Maybe it'd be better to take his communication device with us, if he's got one. After all that noise we made, I wouldn't be surprised if someone was already on their way."

"Where to, then?" asked Snow, rubbing his hands together in excitement. "Should we knock out this Gregor guy — "

"We'll need to find our stuff, first," interjected Fang. She bent over the soldier's unconscious body and patted down the uniform until she came across what appeared to be an ID card. "No name," she added, once she examined the card, "but could be handy to take with us, just in case."

"Nothing else?" asked the Lieutenant, and Fang shook her head. "Right. We'll have to check every room until we find our belongings, then, without drawing too much attention to ourselves. Once we're armed we can stop to talk. I'll take the lead — Snow, watch our backs. Noel, Fang, keep your wits about you."

"Wait," said Noel, a sudden thought occurring to him, and though the Lieutenant told him that they could not afford the delay he heard Noel out nevertheless. "I think I could fit into this uniform. If we can find one for each of us, then maybe we wouldn't look as suspicious?"

"Fair point," replied the Lieutenant. "I don't think we'll be able to find uniforms just anywhere, but it's a good start." So, with the help of Snow and the Lieutenant, Noel removed the soldier of his Ambassadors' uniform and fit himself into it. Admittedly it felt a bit strange to wear the man's clothes (especially the lower half of the uniform, as it was more tightly fitted than what he was used to), but Noel found himself not too bothered so long as he didn't think about it very much.

Afterward they began their escape, moving lightly yet quickly. The hallways they passed were different from those Noel remembered from before, though just as before they were strangely vacant. These hallways were narrower and more brightly lit. Though doors lined the halls, none of them would open, not even when Fang tried waving the ID card around.

"There's no slot?" asked Lieutenant Strike in hushed whisper, and Fang shook her head and handed him the card to try for himself. After several more unsuccessful attempts they were left with no choice but to press on. As they walked, Noel glanced down to look at himself carefully. The only possession he appeared to be missing were his swords. More importantly, he could feel the cords on his right arm intact, to his relief; though his life as a hunter at the ends of the world was a life now long lost, Noel wasn't sure how he would have felt if they'd been removed during his captivity. Even if life as he once knew it was fading, he was still the same person….

Noel's mind lingered upon this last thought. He began to wonder what kind of life he would be able to live when this was all over. He couldn't even imagine what the state of the world would be in by that time. Noel doubted that the merging of their world with Valhalla was an easily reversible process; Noel had a feeling that, once the chaos from Valhalla was fully unleashed onto their world, the damage would be irreparable. There was also the question of whom he'd spend his time with. Noel would only have Hope, now that Yeul and Caius were no longer with him —

And Serah, Noel added to himself. He glanced over his shoulder at Snow. The Lieutenant had said there would be no time to stop and talk until they'd found their belongings again, but Noel couldn't put it off any longer. Noel needed to tell him what had happened to Serah, but he did not want to lose Snow either. He was sure Snow would not take that news well, and he did not want to cause Snow to lose his vigor. He did not want to give Snow a reason to stop fighting.

No. Noel needed to do this now, while he still had the chance.

"No more excuses," Noel muttered to himself, falling back to match Snow's stride. Snow, having heard him, frowned and turned to face Noel once they were walking beside each other.

"You say something, Noel?"

Noel nodded quickly.
The moment had finally come.

"We need to talk… about Serah."


When Hope reopened his eyes, he was met with silence. Sometime during his recollection Vanille had returned to her seat. Her head was now bowed, her hands buried in her lap. Hope could tell she was troubled, he knew her well enough to read the signs. Despite these signs, she hadn't yelled at him, hadn't interrupted him, hadn't yet cried… she seemed to be taking the truth better than he had expected her to, though he knew Vanille held her emotions in well.

Hope wanted to ask her what she thought of his decisions, how she felt about what he'd done, if she was disappointed in him — but before he could get the chance they were interrupted by a knocking upon the door.

"Sorry," said a voice laden with an accent Hope now knew well, "I heard Director Estheim's voice. Is he awake?"

Hope turned to the door. Now standing in their presence was Colonel Euledin, who was leaning slightly against the door frame as he regarded each of them in turn. Hope detected a faint grimace upon the Colonel's face.

"Sir," replied Hope, nodding his head quickly to acknowledge the Colonel. "Sorry for the trouble."

"It's good to see you've come round," said Colonel Euledin. There wasn't the usual harshness in his voice, though his mannerisms were otherwise the same. Hope was curious: Had something changed, or was the Colonel only playing it soft with him because he had just recovered?

"For how long was I out?"

The question had been intended for the Colonel, but from the corner of his eye he caught a glimpse of Vanille counting off the days with her fingers — and something else now caught his eye. His gaze snapped to her direction, as if to properly examine her hand.

"Hey, Vanille, what happened to your — ?"

"It's nothing!" cried Vanille, burying her hand in her lap once more. But before she could provide any further defense, the Colonel interjected.

"Your friend told you the truth just now. Don't you think you ought to fess up?"

Both Hope and Vanille turned to the Colonel, each regarding him with a different expression. So the Colonel had heard, then. For a moment Hope also wondered what the Colonel thought of his choice in decisions, considering he had initially been so opposed to Hope's course of action. At the very least, the Colonel didn't appear to be angry with him, and Hope knew the Colonel was generally blunt and easy to read.

Just as Hope whispered to the Colonel his pleas for keeping the truth a secret to everyone else ("Especially Noel," said Hope, "I don't think I can tell him just yet."), Vanille began to speak.

"Hope, I'm sorry. When we last spoke, I didn't tell you what really happened when Fang and I were separated. But see…" and here she properly raised her right hand to Hope. Several of her fingers were shorter than they should've been, as if her fingertips had been removed, though there were no bodily signs indicating her fingers could have once been longer. Either several of Vanille's fingers had always been that short or they had shrunken in length, the latter of which Hope doubted.

"My crystal statue and Fang's did not detach where they should have, and several fingertips broke off where they shouldn't have. But it's nothing, Hope, really! I've got all my fingers still, though they're slightly odd in size, and Fang's got all hers. Everyone's been making a big fuss, especially Fang — she keeps saying I'm missing most of my hand, but it's just a couple of fingertips! — but frankly, I'm just grateful to be alive."

Hope remained silent as he took in Vanille's words. Truthfully the fact did not bother him at all, especially through the perspective of Vanille's last words. He, too, was only glad Vanille was alive and well, not in crystal stasis. Hope was still trying to discern her current standpoint; Vanille was good with keeping in her emotions, and in light of what he had admitted to her only moments before Hope wasn't sure how Vanille felt about him.

"You're okay," said Hope after a time, borrowing the words she had once given him. Vanille then broke into a sigh of relief, a soft smile tugging at the corners of her lips. "Am I okay, though?"

"Sure thing," she replied, raising her head and giving him her cheeriest smile. "We'll talk later, Hope. But yes, you're okay."

"I hate to interrupt again," said the Colonel after clearing his throat, as if to make his presence known in an otherwise heartfelt moment; "but to address the real reason why I'm here — and great timing on your awakening I might add, Director —"

"Just call me Hope," said Hope. "You never used to call me Director that much, and I know your preference is for Director Haussen."

"Right… Hope it is." The Colonel paused for a moment, turning to both Hope and Vanille before speaking again. "Can you walk? I came to summon Miss Vanille, here, but since you're awake I'm sure you'd make a welcome addition." Hope frowned at these words, and without immediate delay he got up and followed the Colonel out of the room, Vanille alongside him. As he turned to Vanille, who regarded him with an equally puzzled look, the Colonel continued to explain: "You've been summoned for a strategy briefing, though I suspect it's almost reached conclusion. While you were out, we received a distress call from Sazh Katzroy."

"Sazh?" echoed Hope. "Where is he?" So, the Colonel began to enlighten Hope with the rescue mission the Academy had initiated not even a day ago. Hope had to admit, he was impressed that Noel thought to rescue Snow.

"Something's jamming the signal, though," continued the Colonel. "No one's been responding to our communications. Katzroy's distress call came directly from the airship, says the communication devices haven't been working well within the Thirteenth Ark. More importantly, the rescue party was taken captive, though they were able to reunite with Snow."

"No!" Vanille gasped suddenly. Hope understood the sentiment. She was likely thinking of Fang, just as Hope was concerned for Noel.

"So this strategy briefing is about rescuing the rescue party, then?" asked Hope, and the Colonel nodded.

"Katzroy says he'll go into hiding. Supposedly Gregor is planning a public execution, and we can't have that." At these words the three came to a stop in front of the strategy briefing room. Hope was too familiar with it now, having already sat inside that large room more than he would've liked. He could already hear Ellen's voice, but before he could enter the room the Colonel reached for him, holding him back. As fingers clasped around Hope's wrist a sudden shock coursed through Hope, causing him to jump.

Hope had a suspicion he knew the cause.

"Miss Vanille, go on ahead," said the Colonel. "Hope, a word?"

Hope nodded, somewhat worried. What could the Colonel want? Though the Colonel had been strangely softer to him today than on most days, they didn't exactly have a good history together. Hope knew Colonel Euledin had trust issues with him, ever since the beginning, so Hope could only begin to imagine what this could be about. As his concern grew, Hope failed to notice Vanille waving to him as she left his side and entered the room.

"Don't look at me like that, I don't mean harm." The sharp words caused Hope to look the Colonel straight into his eyes, and Hope was met with an expression that hardly matched the man's words. Colonel Euledin seemed apologetic, almost. "Like I said before, I overheard your little story to Vanille, so I wanted to apologize for my bad timing. Your secret won't leave me, I swear on it."

Hope blinked, slightly confused. Was that all he wanted to say? Hope hadn't doubted that the Colonel might.

When Hope relayed these thoughts, the Colonel shook his head and continued, "More than that, Hope. I also wanted to apologize. I've been giving you a hard time, so let me explain myself. You're out of the norm, and I disliked that. The militia division, the research division… they were all mighty fine until you appeared. Hell, everything was fine until you showed up. Then again, a part of me knew that was why you showed up, because things were about to get nasty, but I didn't want to trust that. From my experience, trust is everything. You can't trust your enemies, you can't trust the dead, you can't trust strangers. You don't let your guard down for just anyone — to me, you were just a man who talked ideals. You didn't build Bhunivelze, you only proposed the idea. You wanted good for the world, and I respected that much, but I never saw you do a damn thing.

"That said, you proved me wrong. Giving up your life to save your friends — that ain't something a man of all talk just does. You put yourself on the line, trusted in your colleagues despite the unfamiliarity… you're more of a man than I could ever be. I know it's not much coming from someone who couldn't learn to trust in others, but I hope we can put differences aside from this point onward and work to save the world together."

Colonel Euledin stopped there. A silence settled between them, though the Colonel's words continued to echo in Hope's head. Hope was at a loss of words. He knew the Colonel had not liked him much, though he hadn't understood the extent of that perspective, and though he was provoked and slightly irritated by the Colonel's side remarks Hope did understand those belonged to the Colonel of the past. What he said was true, and Hope had acknowledged it before. Hope had wanted to stop taking a backseat, had wanted no longer to watch others sacrifice their lives to do good for the world; Hope supposed he was beginning to reap the benefits.

In the end, Hope only managed a stiff nod. The Colonel took the action as sufficient, and after heaving a small sigh he ushered Hope into the room. They were met by a small group of scientists and lieutenant colonels; Ellen and Vanille were already waving to Hope, who was still muted from his conversation with the Colonel; once Hope took notice, however, he recovered quickly, and after flashing the Colonel's an apologetic smile Hope left his side to join them.

"Hope!" Ellen cried, smiling brightly at him as he drew near. "Vanille told me the news!"

"News?" asked Hope, looking alarmed. News? — but as it turned out Vanille had not told Ellen anything, and the 'news' Ellen spoke of was referring to his general consciousness. "Oh, yeah…"

"Glad to see you're well!" continued Ellen, and Hope nodded. "How're you feeling? You've been brought up to speed, then?"

"All right, I suppose. What's the situation?"

Ellen eyed him for a moment. It was clear she did not want to leave the subject of Hope's well-being and the circumstances surrounding his previous unconsciousness, but she quickly dropped the matter and returned to the issue at hand. "We're assembling a team to retrieve the four hostages. Now that you're awake, I presume you'll want to come along? — or do you need more rest?"

"I'm fine. I'd like to come, if that's all right." As he said this, Hope subconsciously reached for his wrist. He could almost feel the Brand pulsing through his clothes. He was scared to confirm it with his own eyes, nor did he dare do so with so many people present. "If there's room for me, that is."

"You're always welcome," said Ellen warmly, "and I'm sure Noel would appreciate it. I think he spent more time by your side than he spent sleeping. Though that doesn't say much since he slept with you, too."

"He slept with me?"

"Mm, he fell asleep by your bedside."

"Oh, right." The more he thought on it, the more Hope could picture Noel hunched over his bed with concern. Hope was surprised that Noel had left his side at all — All the more reason I can't tell him the truth, Hope added to himself bitterly. He could only begin to imagine how worried Noel must've been. After all, Noel didn't have an explanation for what had happened, and it was obvious he hadn't blacked out for nearly as long as Hope had. Hope wouldn't be surprised if Noel had blamed himself… somehow, Hope suspected Noel had done exactly that.

The conversation had continued on without Hope. Ellen was now talking about things Hope didn't understand in context, though he was able to follow the theories behind what she was saying. Apparently the Thirteenth Ark was once protected by security barriers that the Ambassadors had erected since their occupation of the floating fortress, but the Academy managed to breach them with Sazh's airship. As he understood it, the Ambassadors had yet to repair those barriers.

"Entry into the Ark won't be made any easier than this," she concluded. "If we're going to embark we should do so soon. I can take a fleet, since Sazh is presently unable to leave the Ark. The question at hand is whether we want to launch an assault or keep this strictly a rescue operation."

"Took the words out of my mouth," added the Colonel, but before he could offer further words Hope stepped forward.

"Hold on, wouldn't it be a bad thing for you to go? That wouldn't be appeasing Gregor's demands, would it?"

But the Director merely shrugged and gave no further acknowledgement of the question. Hope suspected Ellen had her own motives in visiting the Thirteenth Ark; then again, so did he. Hope had always had interest in the Thirteenth Ark, ever since he'd seen it aloft in Academia's skies. But it was more than just Graviton Cores, now. The Thirteenth Ark was mentioned on multiple accounts in the mythological texts he'd read, Hope knew it could not be a coincidence. He needed to visit the Ark for himself.

He also needed to save Noel. That was important, too.

Then there was that thing he'd said to Pulse, that Light would only awaken and relinquish the gate once they were all reunited — on the Thirteenth Ark, Hope was sure of it.

'And the Thirteenth Ark will be the salvation for all of Pulse's children…' It only continued to make more sense as Hope repeated the words to himself in his head. He'd even said it to Pulse, though he hadn't understood the implications of his conclusion in that moment:

They, the ex-Pulse l'Cie, were Pulse's children.

Together, with Light, they would fight the battle that must be fought, the menace beyond: Valhalla.

His conclusions weren't proven fact, but Hope could not see another explanation; consequently, Hope was carried away in the thought. Fang, Sazh and Snow were already on the Thirteenth Ark, and he and Vanille would soon join them. He had already saved Fang, Vanille and Snow, and he was already so close to saving Light, too….

But what about Serah, Hope thought to himself, would she need to be there, too?

"Hope?" Hope shook the thoughts from his head, if only for the moment, and turned to the Director.

"Hmm?"

"Meeting adjourned, were you not listening? Prepare to embark in half an hour's time."

"Sorry. I won't be late, I promise." Hope then excused himself from the Director's presence and hurriedly made for his and Noel's tent. There was a lot he still needed to get done in half an hour's time. He tried to retain the conclusions from his previous train of thought, though the smaller details were beginning to leave him. There was something biting at him, as if there were something important he was meant to consider but had not yet thought of, but consumed in his excitement Hope pushed it aside and thought nothing more on it.


Despite his first words, Noel had chosen to approach the subject by first speaking about Yeul: her nature as a seeress and how she could not avoid her fate. Noel hoped that by stressing the inevitability of Serah's passing, Snow's reaction would be less severe. Naturally, the more Noel talked about Yeul's fate the more Snow began to grow wary, and before Noel could even reach the bridge connecting Yeul and Serah Snow had already put two and two together.

"Is Serah…?" began Snow, and Noel grimaced and nodded stiffly as his reply. He caught sympathetic glances from Fang and the Lieutenant, who were walking ahead of them, but he was mostly concerned for Snow. Snow's head was now bowed, his steps slowing to a stop, his breathing loud and shallow….

"But why?" asked Snow, and though his voice was harsh it had somehow been contained in a whisper. It was the same reaction he'd had, Noel noted to himself, and Noel could only begin to imagine Snow's turmoil. Noel had known Serah well, but what more for Snow, who had been engaged to her? — but Noel could not think on it, for Snow had come to a complete stop and called for the group to do the same.

"I can't do this."

"Snow — "

"Just give me a moment, I need to take this in. You guys go on ahead."

"You'll only be worse off," countered the Lieutenant. Noel had to agree. He thought upon his days at the bunkers, how he had joined the military per Hope's suggestion to keep himself from thinking too much. (Had Hope explicitly given him this reasoning? Noel was no longer sure, but being busy with civilian protection had certainly helped him cope.) If Snow were to remain here then he would only drown in despair, and were the Ambassadors to find him here Noel suspected Snow would be too consumed to put up much of a fight.

Noel voiced these concerns, earning no defense from Snow. His suspicions were confirmed, but not before Fang called out to them.

"There's something up ahead."

Even this had caught Snow's attention. True to Fang's word, heaps of unconscious bodies lay before them. As Noel took a better look at his surroundings he soon realized that they had returned to the location where they fought Gregor before.

"They didn't even try hiding this mess," said Fang, nudging the body closest to her with her foot. "Well, this solves the uniform issue. Take your pick?"

Thus, the next half hour was spent sifting through piles of dead bodies for the cleanest uniforms to borrow. Noel, who was already wearing his, searched in Snow's stead, if not to distract himself from thoughts of Snow's anguish; Snow, who was off to the side, appeared to be taking the time to gather himself as he'd initially proposed. But finding disguises was not an easy task, as many of the uniforms were bloodstained and most would not fit Fang or Snow due to their drastically different body types.

Still, what made Noel most uneasy was the evident lack of soldier presence.

"You think something's happened?" Noel asked Lieutenant Strike offhandedly, once their search was drawing to a close. "We couldn't possibly have wiped out all their men."

"Maybe," replied the Lieutenant as he fitted himself with his new outfit. "That, or no one's patrolling. We still don't know the reason why they brought Snow's statue to the Thirteenth Ark in the first place. They might have other priorities."

Noel said nothing to these words. He was reminded of when he and Hope had first seen the Ambassadors' ships flying in the skies of Gran Pulse, how Hope had grown excited upon pinpointing the airships' destination. Then, Noel had suspected it to be a trap, as he was certain the Ambassadors were aware of both directors' interests in the Thirteenth Ark. Now, Noel was more willing to believe that the Ambassadors might've had a higher purpose.

Fang and Snow joined them shortly after, each of them wearing an oddly sized suit: Fang's was too large, and Snow's was slightly undersized. Once they were assembled, they began talk of their next course of action. As it turned out, the room they were in was a crossroads of sorts, so figuring out their sense of direction was the first task at hand.

"We came from this way, just now," said Noel, pointing to the brightly lit passage before them. He then raised his left hand, pointing to another passage. "We started over there, pretty sure, which means this last path is where…"

All eyes turned to Noel as his sentence came to a dying stop. Noel had wanted to say "where the Lieutenant and I found Snow," but he caught the glimmer of something shiny from the corner of his eye. Noel turned to examine the cause, as did the others, and they were met with a pleasant surprise that had somehow escaped them during their previous search for uniforms.

"They really didn't clean up, then," said Fang, picking up her double-bladed spear. "It's like we hadn't been gone at all."

As Noel picked his swords off the floor, he began to reflect upon Fang's words. Coupled with the lack of soldier presence, Noel was fostering a similar suspicion. Everything had been left in disarray, as if someone was meant to stumble upon the remains of their battle….

"This is what I think," said Noel after a moment. "The four of us get detained, Gregor puts the word out that he intends to execute us. Suspecting reinforcements, he leaves our weapons in the masses to psyche them out, as evidence that we were once here. Gregor then catches the reinforcements off guard and executes them along with us. What he doesn't count on is us breaking free and returning to the scene first."

"It's a start," said the Lieutenant. "Sounds like something he'd do. Except Gregor's not here to capture us. If what you say is true, he would have likely kept this place under better watch."

There was a pause between them as they continued to think over their situation. In that moment, Noel wanted to ask the Lieutenant if he and Gregor were really related, having just been reminded of the Lieutenant's previous 'bluff,' but before he could manage the question the silence was interrupted by Snow's mumbling:

"Was she mad at me?"

Noel turned to Snow in disbelief. She, as in Serah? Had Snow really asked him this? Why would he think…?

"What? No, of course she wasn't."

"Did she say anything about me?" continued Snow. "Before she … was there anything she wanted to say to me?"

Noel shook his head. Serah's passing had been too sudden. There was no way she could've prepared any last words for Snow. Noel tried to communicate this to Snow, though Snow did not appear to take in any of his words.

"When I left her to find Light, when I put our engagement on hold, I was sure she was upset with me. And now, she's… gone… I don't want to believe it, not until I've seen her myself, but if what you say is true — "

"It's true."

Snow closed his eyes, exhaling softly. "Then I only hope her last thought of me wasn't a bitter one. I don't know what I'm meant to do, now that there's no Serah… she was everything to me."

"I'm sorry… Snow, I'm sorry." Noel turned away for a moment to distract himself from the burning sensation in his chest. The Lieutenant and Fang had wandered away from them and were pointing down one of the passageways, their conversation incomprehensible from where Noel stood. Gulping down his emotions, Noel returned to Snow and added, "You told me to protect her, and I couldn't."

"Nothing you could do," said Snow.

It was meant to be encouragement, but Snow could not keep the bitterness from his voice.

Noel continued. "But I promise you. Serah never doubted you. You never left her mind, she stood by you until the very end."

Snow did not reply immediately, and in the silence that followed Noel only prayed that his words would have an impact on Snow. He meant it all, of course: No matter the situation, no matter how much trouble Noel gave Serah, she had always stood up for Snow, had always believed in him. Noel was then reminded of her grief at the Sunleth Waterscape, when she'd discovered his l'Cie Brand, and as her cries filled his head there was no doubt in his mind that Serah had truly loved Snow.

Always.

"She loved you, Snow."

"And she's gone."

Noel's heart pained at these words.

"What am I meant to do?" continued Snow. "What did you do, Noel?"

"Me? You mean to cope?"

Noel still knew that moment well. He'd been on the airship to Port Dexum when it occurred to him that Serah would live on through her dreams and her ideals, that to keep Serah's dream alive was to protect Hope. He told these things to Snow, how Hope had become someone important to him, how he'd given himself a new purpose: to serve Hope as a means of atoning for his mistakes in allowing Yeul and Serah to come to harm.

"Give yourself purpose," said Noel. "Don't just give up because she's gone. Serah died on the belief she'd saved the world. I think a good start would be to protect the world she worked so hard to save."

"Protect the world, huh." Snow repeated the words to himself several times, decisively nodding to himself after a while. "Hey, Noel. Got someone you love?"

Noel tried his best to keep the color from his face.

"Why the sudden question?"

Snow shrugged, a smug grin upon his face as he spoke. "Dunno, you were beginning to sound like Mr. Love Doctor over here or something. Thought maybe you were speaking from experience."

Noel frowned, brow furrowed from the peculiarity of the question. Was it that Snow suspected him of having loved Serah, or was there really no ulterior motivation to the question? He supposed Snow had a valid reason to ask… or, perhaps, making a joke out of the moment was Snow's way of cheering himself up?

"Not sure," Noel said at last. "Maybe I do love someone, maybe I don't. But you're right about one thing. I was speaking from experience. I've lost one too many good people in my life. No more."

The Lieutenant and Fang were now returning, Noel could see them from a distance. Noel turned to Snow once more, relieved that he'd been able to calm Snow down, even if only a little bit. Noel nodded his head over to the rest of their company — a suggestion that they meet them halfway — and as Snow nodded in agreement he added in a quieter voice.

"I believe in you, Noel."

But when Noel asked Snow to elaborate, Snow refused to explain himself.


In his preparations Hope came upon several observations. The first was the atmosphere of the people who greeted him upon his return to the bunkers. There was a certain thickness to the air. Hope could no longer hear the laughter of oblivious children; he heard a soldier in passing remark how these days families were keeping to their own tents. It wasn't surprising to Hope, though it made him uneasy. He was sure the people were beginning to grow restless after days and days of no good news, and the thought that they might never be able to return to their homes was surely only adding to their despair.

Even Dajh, who was normally cheerful, seemed somewhat down. As Hope gathered things from his tent, Dajh poked his head into the opening of the tent and greeted him halfheartedly.

"Heya, Hope."

"Hey." Hope was already finished, as there was not much here he needed to collect, but he allowed himself a few minutes to catch up with Dajh. "How's Mog? Have you been taking good care of him?"

"Of course!" Only then did Hope notice that the lifeless Mog was still in Dajh's embrace. Had he ever set Mog down even once, Hope began to wonder, but guilt took over that thought. Distracted by thoughts of saving his friends, Hope had completely forgotten to follow up on Mog's condition. Hope had made very little progress on that front, and even Ellen hadn't been able to come up with any valid explanations; a part of Hope was relying on the possibility that in saving Light and the world he would also save Mog. There just wasn't enough known on the subject of moogles from which to draw any sound conclusions.

"Have you heard from my dad?" continued Dajh. "He's been gone for a little while now."

"He went to rescue Snow," replied Hope. He did not know how often Sazh and Ellen informed him of current events: the boy seemed unfazed at the sight of Hope being conscious once more, so Hope suspected Dajh hadn't been told that much. To not tell Dajh about his father's distress call was probably for the better, Hope decided.

"Aw, okay. Are you headed somewhere too? Don't be gone for too long, okay? It gets pretty lonely down here, none of the kids come out to play anymore. I know everyone's out saving the world and all… I just wish Daddy would let me come with him, too."

"It's dangerous out there," said Hope grimly. "You know he's just looking out for you."

Hope's second observation was on the subject of Serah, which occurred not too long after he'd said goodbye to Dajh, when he was already on his way to his house to gather more materials. He had come across Vanille on the way out, and by her request she was accompanying him there. "I want to see Serah," was what she had told him, and Hope could not deny her this. Naturally Vanille had other motivations in joining him, though Hope expected this.

"Don't know your new Focus, then?" Vanille asked, and Hope could only shake his head solemnly in reply. "Guess they never do, huh?"

The subject of their conversation did not remain on him for very long, though, as the sight of Serah was enough for Vanille to drop her previous concerns. Vanille gasped softly, and as she fell to her knees she clasped her hands over Serah to pray over her. In an attempt to distract himself, Hope busied himself with his preparations and thoughts. Most of his supplies had been depleted during his time spent with Noel on Pulse, so he would need to replenish those in case they would be needed on the Thirteenth Ark.

Hope could not stop thinking about the other Pulse, however. He was a l'Cie again. He would be able to use magic again! He would no longer feel useless in the fight for their world, though he would have to be careful around Noel since Noel knew of his struggles with magic usage —

But Hope didn't know his Focus. On the one hand, Hope wasn't too concerned about his fal'Cie-given Focus: He had given himself his own Focus, so to speak. But on the other hand, what if his 'Focus' interfered with ensuring the world's and his friends' safety? He and Pulse had come to an agreement, but had his Focus been explicitly mentioned? Was it to awaken Light? For their world and the Valhalla to merge? To bring about Etro's Gate? — and should Hope succeed, would he be granted pardon, be reunited in whatever turmoil befalls this world, or would he turn to crystal for having completed his Focus? Worse yet, would he turn to Cieth?

Hope was finally beginning to understand the implications of the gamble he'd taken. In taking a step toward saving his friends, he had sacrificed his life. Vanille, Fang and Snow were freed from their fates, with Light soon to follow. But he had doomed his own life, hadn't he? In some sense he'd prepared for this, he knew his friends had made sacrifices in doing good for the world, he had set out to honor those sacrifices. Even in meeting Pulse, Hope had not backed down. he had stood by his resolve. But now that he had the time to reflect upon his actions…?

"Are you troubled?" asked Vanille, rousing Hope from his thoughts. "Regret?"

"Maybe…" Hope sighed, turning to face her. She was now on her feet, back turned to the lifeless Serah. "I know I told you I wasn't after becoming a l'Cie, but in the end that's what I became. I know, I let you down. I guess I've only just started to think about just what it means to have become a l'Cie again… I got carried away."

But Vanille only shook her head. "No, Hope, you haven't. Your actions have only proven your character, wouldn't you agree? There are a lot of people who would not have done what you did. It's true, I was shocked when you told me what had really happened. But I'm not disappointed in you, Hope. We're facing the end of the world, aren't we? You've come to accept reality better than most of us. I know being a l'Cie is a terrifying thing, but the sacrifice you made… I don't think any of the others could be mad at you after what you've done for them.

"It's important to not lose sight of where we're headed. We have to keep our dreams alive… something to look forward to. And if it begins to hurt, if you begin to regret? — think of the future, when everything tides over. Think of Light, of Noel — all of us, in a world we saved together, Hope. A world in which we could not exist together had it not been for what you'd done."

"Will I be alive to see that world?" asked Hope weakly, but Vanille only raised a finger at him.

"Ah, but what did I just say about regretting what you've done? The past can't be changed, Hope, not any longer. Think of the future, okay? Until we reach there, Hope, remember that you can always count on me to support you."

Hope could not think of any words to give Vanille. He could always count on her to give him comfort, and he was glad that much hadn't changed since his childhood. Overwhelmed with gratitude, he could only offer her a smile, rubbing the back of his neck abashedly before turning to Serah.

"Serah, too," he whispered. "The future, I mean. Noel and I promised to say goodbye to her properly when this is all over. That's something else I can look forward to."

"That's the spirit." Vanille sighed softly as she placed a hand — her good hand — upon Hope's shoulder. "Speaking of spirit… Serah hasn't passed yet. You know this, right?"

At these words Hope frowned. Hasn't passed? — what could Vanille mean?

"Don't get me wrong," said Vanille quickly, sensing Hope's confusion; "I don't think Serah's going to come back. But her spirit is still wandering, she hasn't properly passed. I don't really know how to explain it, it's because Etro's gone that…"

Vanille trailed off, unsure of how to finish her sentence. At the mention of Etro's name, a thought occurred to Hope. Was it because Etro was no longer there to greet mankind upon death? Hope tried to recall the exact wording from the mythological texts, but nothing concrete came to mind, not with so many other floating thoughts in his head distracting him.

"I think I understand," said Hope slowly. "But what does this mean?"

"I'm not sure," replied Vanille. "But just think of it as a reason to not give up. Serah's not gone, not completely. I'm sure wherever she is, she's watching over you, and Noel, and all of us. So, better not keep her waiting, right? Time to save the world!"

"…did I mention how much I've missed you?" And with that Hope allowed Vanille to take him by the hand to lead them back to headquarters. As they were leaving, Hope took one last glance at Serah, and under his breath he bade her a few last words:

I told you we would save everyone, Serah. Next time we meet, I'll have Light with me. I promise.


Chapter Posted: 05 Sep 2013
Last Edited: 31 Jan 2014

Upcoming: Hope comes to terms with the weight of his sacrifice; Noel's eyes are opened to several, shocking truths.