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Chapter 11 Free Spirit
During the next week Livia tried to get herself something else to think than Paul, but it was hard and once in a while she noticed guys, specially Nixon and Winters, look at her a little worried, but she just gave them a weak smile knowing that she would be alright, she just needed a little time. She had lost guys which she knew during the invasion to France, but loosing a brother was a different thing. Livia had known him for all of her life and her both brothers were the ones she loved most. She was mourning over Paul, but she concentrated on her work and training with guys, so eventually there could go couple of hours when she didn't think about him. Eventually she started to think that Speirs had been right when he said that she might understand her brother when she had read his letter, now she understood a little better that loosing her brother wasn't the end of her world despite first she had thought so. Livia knew that losses were unavoidable and everyone would loose someone they loved, but they they still continued their living remembering the lost ones.
Soon after Paul's death Easy company was supposed to be dropped in France again, but the mission was cancelled and they returned to England again. It was a slight relief to Livia who felt like she wasn't ready yet to return to France, though she hadn't told it to anyone, not even to her best friend Matilda.
Livia was aware of the presence of lieutenant Speirs everytime she saw him, but it seemed like he tried to avoid her and she did the same, she still really couldn't handle the fact that she had spend so long alone with the man everyone respected and even feared. So, the best way to go was to avoid him as much as possible and it wasn't difficult because when they were in Aldbourne D and E companies weren't so much in touch with each others, or not in the level which had affection in Livia's daily life anyway.
It was 2nd of September and Livia's birthday. She was just getting dressed on the morning when Matilda gave her a hug.
"Happy birthday, honey." She smiled to the blonde. "So, you are one year older. How it feels?"
"I feel like I'm still 18." Livia laughed. "But thanks. I think that you are the only one who actually remember that it's my birthday."
"I wouldn't be so sure about that." Matilda had a little smile on her lips.
"What are you saying?" Livia raised her eyebrows a little.
"I'm just saying that you might be surprised. But I'm not going to tell you anything else."
Matilda had so stubborn look in her face that Livia thought it wasn't point in trying to get her tell more.
Livia was working in the hospital building the whole day and when she saw some of the guys from Easy it seemed like they had no idea that she had a birthday, and Livia wasn't even going to tell them. She had never liked to celebrate her birthdays anyway. Later on the day Livia was just going to nurse's barrack when she passed the D company tents and heard a male voice talking loud, he wasn't yelling but his tone was dangerous.
"You are going to do like I say, sergeant." Livia recognized the voice and when she came around the corner of one of the tents, she saw Speirs talking to one of his sergeants. The poor sergeant looked like he would rather be in Normandy than there to be shout by Speirs, who seemed very angry.
"But, sir..." The sergeant stammered and looked straight to Livia who stood behind Speirs.
"No buts, sergeant." Speirs barked but turned when he heard a female voice behind him.
"Ah lieutenant Speirs. Good that I found you." Livia said when she had taken a deep breath. She didn't really want to interrupt Speirs, but she felt bad for sergeant who seemed to be scared.
"I heard that colonel Sink is looking for you, lieutenant." She continued and took few steps backwards when Speirs' hard eyes almost pierced her.
"Why?"
"I don't know, lieutenant." Livia piped.
"Alright then." Speirs turned back on the D company sergeant. "We're not done yet, sergeant."
With that he marched towards heardquarter building and the sergeant looked to Livia.
"Thank you, nurse. Christ, I thought he would shoot me on this spot."
"I figured out that much." Livia smiled to him.
"Colonel wasn't really asking after lieutenant, was he?" The sergeant asked then.
"No. He wasn't. But I thought that you might need some help, sergeant."
"Now he will be angry at you, nurse."
"I think so too." Livia sighed. She changed few words with the D company sergeant before she continued her way to nurse's barrack.
Livia had noticed that at least every nurse knew about the fact that she was turning 22 on that day and later on the evening they even gave a present. It was a picture album, where was a pictures of every man of Easy, even those which had been killed in Normandy. There was also pictures of all of the nurses in Aldbourne.
Nurses had gathered on they room getting ready for the evening, because they all had agreed to go to messroom for a drink or two, and gave their present to Livia. Though Livia didn't really want to do a number out of her birthday, she had agreed to go with others.
"Oh my God." Livia gasped "I... I don't know what to say."
"You don't have to say anything." Kate smiled. "We just thought that you might like to have some kind of memory from all of us."
"This is so... Thank you so much" Livia was very touched and wiped tears off her eyes.
"You're welcome." Kate replied giving her a hug."It's from all of us."
"But how did you manage to get all these pictures?" Livia asked going through the album.
"We got some help from couple of guys. And Winters was very helpfull." Matilda replied.
"Dick knows that it's my birthday?" Winters hadn't mentioned about it to Livia, but the fact that she had seen only few guys from Easy that day and Winters or any of the officers wasn't along them. And maybe he had wanted to keep it as a secret until it was her birthday.
"Of course he knows. He is your commanding officer after all." Matilda said.
"I suppose I should have known it." Livia sighed and put her navy blue dress on.
When all the nurses were ready to go they headed to the messroom and when they got there Livia saw Winters and Nixon standing on one corner and went to them.
"Hey guys." She smiled when she greeted them.
"Hey." Winters gave her a hug. "Happy birthday."
"Thanks." Livia looked up to his eyes. "And thanks for the present... It is a great memory for me."
"Matilda told me that you would like it." Winters smiled.
"I do."
"You look great, kid." Nixon smiled to the nurse.
"Stop calling me kid, Nix. I'm gonna turn 22 today. And you're not much older than me." Livia snorted but let the lieutenant take her on his embrace.
"Duh. But you're still a kid." Nixon smiled. "Happy birthday."
"Thanks." Livia smiled back to him.
"Oh yeah, here is an another present for you." Nixon said pulling an envelope from his pocket. "It came yesterday to the mail office and it was given to me because they knew that I'll see you around eventually."
Livia took the envelope and recognized the handwriting on it.
"It's from Colin." She gasped.
"I guessed so." Nixon smiled when Livia put the envelope on her purse. She was going to read the letter inside later on that night.
Livia talked for a moment with Nixon and Winters until they heard Doc's voice above others.
"Listen up, guys! There is one main reason why we all have gathered here tonight!" Livia turned to look towards Doc, who was looking straight to her.
"And the reason is that one of us is getting a year older today!" Doc grinned when he saw Livia squinting a little.
"Our nurse, Livia McMillan has a birthday today. Happy birthday, Livia!" Doc boomed raising his glass as did others in the room. Livia blushed a little and raised her glass.
"Thank you, guys. This was a surprise that you knew about my birthday, but thank you."
"Of course we knew." Buck gave her a hug. "So, did you like your present? I helped Matilda and others to get the pictures on it."
"I love it. Thanks, Buck." Livia smiled to him.
About twenty minutes later Livia was talking with Shifty, Rita, Matilda and Luz when he saw a figure on the door. She realized that it was Speirs who stood there and it seemed like he was looking for someone. Before Livia even realized, he locked eyes with her.
"Oh shit." She gasped and tried to find some place to hide, when she didn't find one, she slid down on her chair so that she was almost under the table.
"What are you doing, Livia?" Luz asked when she noticed the nurse to get a little pale.
"Hiding from Speirs." Was the short answer.
"Why?"
"I don't want him to see me."
"He is looking straight to you, Livia. So he has seen you already." Shifty commented.
"Oh. You're so busted." Rita giggled. She and Matilda knew about the little trick which Livia had pulled on Speirs earlier that day.
"Why is she trying to hide from lieutenant Speirs? I thought..." Shifty started but Rita interrupted him.
"Well, she told him a little white lie earlier today."
"And what was that?" Luz asked when he and Shifty looked interested at Livia.
"Well, I saw him yelling to one of his sergeants and he looked so scared that I thought that I should help him out. I told Speirs that colonel Sink was looking for him."
"When the reality was that he wasn't?" Luz asked smiling a little.
"Hmmm... No, he wasn't." Livia said still looking to Speirs who was now talking to Winters and Harry Welsh.
"He seems quite pissed, Livia." Shifty commented.
"Yeah, he does." Livia said trying to get further under the table.
"Livia, Livia, Livia." Luz said then shaking his head.
"Thanks, George. I think it came clear what my name is."
"What am I gonna do with you, Livia?" Luz choose to ignore her rather sarcastic comment.
"You ain't gonna do anything with me, George." Livia said with an american accent she had learned during the months spent with Easy's men. "I'm a free spirit."
"Yeah, that is what you are. One hell of a free spirit and that's why you're trying to hide under the table." Luz grinned.
"He won't do anything to you, Liv. You know that." Matilda tried to comfort her friend who looked a little scared.
"I guess I do..." She said quietly, but then she saw that Welsh had left Winters and Speirs and was now heading towards their table.
"Lieutenant Speirs wants to talk to you, Livia." Welsh said when he reached the table where the nurse was.
"I... I don't want to talk to him." Livia piped.
"Why?" Welsh raised his eyebrows. He thought that Livia would want to talk to him, he actually knew about Livia's crush, he had heard about it from Buck and it hadn't surprised him. He just hadn't mentioned about it to Winters or to Nixon, because he thought that they didn't need to know it.
"He's pissed at me."
"I thought he seemed a little angry. But I just don't know why." Welsh said thoughtfully.
" Speirs is angry 'cause she's a free spirit." Luz grinned.
"She's… What?" Welsh asked.
"A free spirit. You know… Kind of person who can tell Speirs that colonel Sink is looking for him when he actually isn't." Luz grinned ignoring the death glares which Livia gave him.
"Did you really do so?" Welsh smiled to the nurse.
"Yeah. I heard Speirs yelling to one of his guys and I felt bad for him. So I thought to give him a little helping hand."
"I guess no one else would dare to do something like that." Welsh laughed. "But Livia, what I'm gonna say to lieutenant?"
"Tell him that I'm busy. It's my birthday after all." The nurse replied glancing to Speirs who was staring straight to her again.
"Alright. But you know, you have to talk to him eventually." Welsh commented.
"I'm avoiding him as long as I can." Was the answer and Welsh left their table laughing.
"Way to go, Liv." Matilda giggled. "But I agree, you should avoid him as long as you can."
Soon after Welsh had told Speirs what Livia had asked, the lieutenant left the messroom but not before he had given the nurse the last hard look. When he had left, Livia could relax again and she was actually enjoying the rest of the night.
When Livia and other nurses got back to their barrack, Livia read the letter which Nixon had given her. It was indeed from her brother Colin, who wrote her from Holland where his battalion was on that moment. He congratulated Livia for her birthday and told how he was doing there in the front, but the letter wasn't long and after she had read it Livia was sure that Colin didn't know about her jump to Normandy. If he had known he would have mentioned about it, actually if he had known the letter would have been much longer and full of reason why she shouldn't do anything like that again.
Livia did everything to avoid lieutenant Speirs after the little white lie she had told him on her birthday, but 10 days later the lieutenant catched her by surprise. Livia, Matilda and Kate were going back to their barrack from the hospital building in the evening when they passed the headquarter building.
"Nurse McMillan, I've been looking for you."
All three nurses froze when they heard the voice from the shadows and saw lieutenant Speirs standing on the furthest corner of the building.
"Look at that time." Matilda looked at her wrist watch. "It's time to go to bed. I think you can manage here by yourself, Livia."
"Matty..." Livia bleaded. She certainly didn't want to be left alone with Speirs, not when she had managed to avoid him little over week. If she hadn't known that Speirs wanted to talk about the little trick she had pulled on him, she wouldn't had any objections being alone with him, but now the truth was that she was little scared, though somewhere deep in her mind she knew that Speirs wouldn't want her to get any troubles for what she had done. If he had wanted to cause troubles, he would have told Winters about the trick which Livia had pulled on him and he hadn't done that.
"Come on, Kate. Let's go." Matilda ignored her best friends bleading looks and grapped Kate by her arm pulling her towards the nurses barrack. Kate just gave Livia little compassionate look before she followed the brunette nurse.
"I hate you." Livia hissed after the two nurses who were going pretty fast towards their barrack. Then she turned to Speirs, who stood just few inches from her and despite it was dark she saw that he wasn't looking so happy.
"Lieutenant..."
"I wanted to talk to you about the lie you told me." Speirs interrupted her. "It is not your business to intervene when I'm doing my job."
"I know and I'm sorry." Livia said quietly.
"That's not enough, nurse." Speirs said with a calm voice. The truth was that he wasn't so angry, but he wanted to show this nurse that he wasn't the one to mess with. He didn't want to be too harsh to her though, because this woman had started to raise feelings in him, which he didn't like. And this certainly wasn't the time to have feelings like that.
"I don't know how to explain myself to you, lieutenant." Livia sighed. She started to get nervous under Speirs' inquiring eyes and when she was nervous, she started to talk so much that there was no one who could shut her mouth. "I just thought that you were too harsh to your sergeant. I know that men are scared enough in the front, they shouldn't be scared of their commanding officers and..."
"Nurse..." Speirs tried to get a word between, but it seemed like Livia didn't pay attention to him.
"I just thought that I have to figure out something which would give the sergeant the chance to take a breath... I knew that you would continue the yelling to him later on but..."
"Nurse, maybe you should take..." Now Speirs was getting slightly amused when Livia continued her speech without taking a breathing break.
"And it was my birthday, and I didn't want you to to be angry to your men. I don't like yelling, and it was my birthday..." Livia was getting out of the subject and started to repeat herself. Then a next thing she realized was that Speirs had put his hand under her chin and lifted her head up gently. For few seconds Livia thought that the lieutenant was smiling before he pushed his lips on hers. It wasn't a long, passionate kiss, but Livia thought that she would faint on that very moment. After few seconds Speirs pulled back and watched slightly amused to the nurse who had shut her mouth and looked now at him her green eyes wide.
"What... You... Lieutenant, I..." Livia stammered and felt her face burning.
"It was only way to get you quiet, nurse." Speirs smiled slightly. The kiss hadn't been totally meaningless to him, thought he acted like that.
"I... You... Why you..." Livia just couldn't get out words which would make sense when she still stared the lieutenant who had surprised her totally.
"And I know it was your birthday. I never got the change to congratulate you, miss McMillan."
"I... Thanks. But... I have to...Go..." Livia gave up, her mind wasn't working like it usually did, but she understood that it was better to leave and fast, so she turned on her heels.
"It's better that you don't meddle to my business anymore, nurse." Speirs called after her, but he wasn't angry, he just wanted Livia to get the point. And after all it wasn't her business how he talked to his men. Livia just waved her hand to the lieutenant and when she was gone Speirs cursed himself, he knew that he shouldn't have done what he did, but at that moment he hadn't seen any other options to make the nurse to stop her blabbering. But the truth was also that Livia was getting into him and she was making it in a very big way.
When Livia ran towards to nurses barrack, the only thing in her mind was general Taylor's words 'Flies spread disease'. It was strange, but she just couldn't think straight on that moment. When Livia got to the barrack, she closed the door and leaned to it breathing heavily though it hadn't been a long run from HQ to nurses barrack, but what Speirs had done just had taken her breath away totally.
"Livia? What happened?" Matilda turned to look the nurse, who stood there leaning to the door, breathing heavily and her face was burning red.
"He... He... Speirs..." Livia stammered and took then a deep breath trying to relax at least a little.
"What? Did he slap you?" Kate asked sounding a little worried.
"No! He didn't slap me." Livia replied finally when she had taken few deep breaths more.
"What happened then?" Matilda asked and every nurse in the room watched at the blonde waiting for her answer.
"He... He kissed me."
It came a deadly silence in the room, when the nurses watched Livia at amaze.
"You mean kissed you... On the lips?" Rita finally asked.
Livia just nodded and a small smile came to her face.
"God damnit, girl. The tough ass Speirs kissed you!" Matilda gasped.
"I know... I really can't understand it myself either." Livia stated moving towards her bed.
"But why?" Kate asked.
"I was blabbering, because I was very nervous. He looked so scary." Livia replied and every nurse made understanding sounds, they knew how she got when she was nervous.
"So how was the kiss?" Matilda asked interested.
"It was... Well, it wasn't passionate or anything, after all he did it only because he wanted to shut my mouth."
"But it wasn't only a peek to the lips?"
"No, it wasn't." Livia sighed. "I felt... Strange."
"Well, that is obvious without saying." Michelle stated smiling. "It was lieutenant Speirs who kissed you. I would had fainted on that spot."
"I almost did." Livia sighed. "But I don't want to talk about this anymore. After all, it didn't mean anything. Not to him anyway."
"But you know that it isn't likely to Speirs go around kissing nurses, right? Actually he's the most unlikely man to do it." Matilda commented.
"I know. But still don't want to talk about it." Livia sighed. She was still very confused and it was humming in her head.
The nurses just shaked their head, they wanted to hear more, but they knew that it was no point in pushing her. She wouldn't tell anything if she didn't want to.
On the days following the little episode between Livia and Speirs, she made sure that she didn't ran to the lieutenant and did succeed on that very well. She only saw him from a distance for few times and she actually got the feeling that lieutenant was avoiding her too. She didn't actually mind it, she thought that it was better for them both, after all it was a wartime and anything could happen, specially if they would be sent to mainland again.
Lipton and Talbert had retuned to the company like other not so seriously wounded soldiers. But Popeye was still in hospital and Livia really hoped that he would make it back before they would be dropped to mainland. In the middle of September one evening when Livia and some guys from the company were at messroom, they had news.
Livia was sitting on Nixon's lap by the table where also Michelle, Moose Heyliger, Matilda, Shifty and Rita sat. Livia was talking with Nixon and watching Compton, Toye, Luz and Babe Heffron throwing darts. Suddently she heard Roy Cobb talking to the replacement, James Miller about the Unit Citation which the replacements also were given for what the regiment did in Normandy. Livia wasn't so happy about the way those men which had been in Easy from the beginning sometimes talked to newcomers. She understood them, but she also thought that it was no point in giving hard time to new guys, after all it wasn't their foult that they were replasing the killed guys which had been in Easy company.
Now Livia glared to Cobb and despite Nixon squeezed gently her arm when he saw the nurse getting a bit annoyed, she barked.
"Ease up, Cobb. It's a Unit Citation. I have one too."
She saw Bull Randleman standing near by and watching how private Miller took the Citation off and left the table. Livia gave Bull a bleading look and it seemed like he understood what the nurse tried to tell him.
"Shit, Cobb. You didn't fight in Normandy neither." Bull stated taking Miller's Citation from the table.
Livia heard Cobb start to explain to private Garcia why he didn't take part in battles in Normandy, when Nixon sighed.
"At least Bull knows how to handle the guys. There is one smart guy."
"You're right. He is one of the best guys I know." Livia agreed with him and turned her head so that she could see his eyes. "I've been wondering here that what's up with you? You've been so quiet the whole evening."
"It's just that..." Nixon started but was cut short when everyone heard Smokey Gordon's voice above others.
"Hey, you all! Listen up! I got us an announcement to make." He pulled Lipton from the door where he had been talking with couple of guys and placed hands on his shoulders. "This here is Carwood Lipton."
"He's already married, Smokey!" Livia commented giggling. "But thanks for introduction."
There was general laughing around the room, but Smokey continued.
"This here is Carwood Lipton, the new Easy company first sergeant."
Livia knew already about Lipton's promotion, but she cheered along others.
"As befitting his position, he says he has to make an announcement." Smokey added and let very serious looking Lipton continue.
"Well, I hate to break the mood here boys, but we're moving out again."
There came a deadly silence in the room when everyone realized that they had to make a jump again. Livia felt how Lipton put his arms around her waist and she leaned on his chest.
"You knew about this, didn't you? That's why you've been so quiet." She whispered.
"Yeah, I knew. But I promised to Dick that I won't say anything before we have the confirmation about it. I guess Dick got it." Nixon sighed. "We're going to jump to Holland."
"I guess I have to go and get prepared for it too." Livia said quietly when she stood up. Then she turned to look to Nixon. "Let me know when we are leaving."
"I will." Nixon replied and watched after the nurse. He didn't know what to think about the fact that she was coming with them again. He didn't want her to come but he didn't want to leave her to England either. With a heavy sigh Nixon stood up and saw Luz and Matilda watching him.
"What?" Nixon asked glaring at them.
"She really wants to come with you, lieutenant." Matilda said quietly.
"I know." Nixon sighed wondering how the nurse had guessed his thoughts so well.
"And she will be alright." Matilda continued.
"I know that too. I saw it already in Normandy." Nixon gave out a heavy sigh. "But after what happened to her brother and everything else what's happened..."
"This is what she wants to do. Don't take it away from her, lieutenant." Matilda stated.
"I have no intentions to do anything like that. And now it's too late anyway." Nixon sighed again. "I don't think they call this mission off."
"So, you are really leaving?" Matilda looked to the both men.
"Yes, we are." Nixon took few steps towards the exit. "We have a meeting soon, Luz."
"Yes, sir. I'll be there." He replied.
"So, you are leaving us..." Matilda said leaning on Luz's chest when Nixon was gone. "I guess you have to go and prepare for leaving me once again."
"Yeah. I have to go and listen what Winters and Nix will tell us about this operation."
After the meeting which was kept to all Easy's guys Livia was told that they would be dropped deep in Holland, and the mission was called Operation Market Garden. Their mission was to liberate Eindhoven and make way to British Armored forces. They were also under the British command and as much it seemed to bother the guys, Livia was happy about it. She was a Brit after all and she thought that she might get the change to meet some her countrymen over in Holland.
When the company was getting ready to leave and packing stuffs in the airplane pits near Aldbourne, Livia was doing her own preparation by the tents, when she saw couple of jeeps driving by and for her amazement she saw Popeye and Herbert Sobel on one of the jeeps.
"Damn, it's Sobel." Luz, who was standing near her with James Miller, gasped.
"What is he doing here?" Livia asked a little amazed. "And what is Popeye doing here? I thought he would be in hospital still."
" Who's Sobel?" Miller asked.
"He was the first CO of Easy." Livia said watching how Popeye got down from the jeep.
"Why he isn't anymore then?" Miller asked.
"He got promoted." Luz answered simply.
"Thank to God – or rather thanks to Sink for that." Livia sighed. "If you excuse me now guys, I'm gonna go and talk to Popeye."
Livia marched to Popeye who was talking with Lipton and Bull and gave the private a hug.
"Welcome back, Pop. Thought I'm wondering that why you were released from hospital already."
"He wasn't." Bull smiled a little. "He's AWOL."
"You are all nuts." Livia sighed shaking her head. "But can you make the jump?"
"Yeah. I just can't sit." Popeye grinned a little.
"Well, when you leave the hospital earlier than you should, you have to suffer the concequenses of it." Livia smiled a little and stroke gently Popeye's arm. "It's good to see you though."
"You too, kid." Then Popeye got more serious. "I heard about your brother. I'm sorry that I wasn't there."
"It's alright, Pop." Livia gave him a weak smile. "So, you got a lift from Sobel?"
"Yeah." Popeye laughed.
"Does he know that you are AWOL?"
"Yeah, he knows. But when he saw me in Aldbourne he just told me to hop in." Popeye grinned. "Probably he will take me to court marshal later on."
"What is he doing here anyway?" Livia asked. She wasn't too pleased to see Sobel again once they had gotten rid of him.
"He's the new supply officer." Lipton replied.
"Ah... So we won't see him too frequently?" There was such hope in her voice that all three men started to laugh.
"No, we won't." Bull finally replied.
"That is good news. But now..." Livia gave out a heavy sigh. "I think I have to find the plane I'm supposed to got in. See you in Holland, guys."
"See you." Popeye said. "And Livia, be careful."
"You too!" The nurse replied waving her hand when she was already going to take her stuff.
Livia got in the same plane with Nixon, Luz, Babe Heffron, Malarkey and five other guys. There was again very limited space for them, but it didn't bother the nurse, who sat next to Nixon. When the planes were above Holland, Nixon squeezed hard Livia's hand and gave her a couraging look before it was time to make the jump.
