"Italics" – Symbiote-Host communication or personal inner thoughts


Always Be Ours

Chapter 10

Misunderstandings


The thought sliced through her mind again. Lantash didn't want her as a mate.

She would still have Daniel, and she would still have Lantash. But—she wouldn't be Lantash's formally acknowledged mate. How would she live with this? She had to though; there was no other way. She had to be with these two men because being without them simply wasn't an option.

Sam almost panicked as the pain hit her. She had to get out of here and back to the ladies' room to recover from this shock. She had not even considered that Lantash would not want her as a wife. He loved her. She knew he did. Nevertheless, here was proof that as much as he loved her, it wasn't enough to want her as an acknowledged mate. But hadn't he acknowledged her already? God, she was so confused.

What could she possibly say to cover this up? Of course. She smiled, or at least she hoped it passed for a smile. "Daniel, I know you won't believe this, but I have to go to the ladies' room again. I drank a lot of tea this afternoon, not even thinking about the effect it has on me. When I get nervous and excited it makes it worse."

"But, Sam, what question is it that you think that I have to ask you for Lantash? I mean, I'm completely lost. I'm sorry if I've missed something here. I really don't want anything to spoil this night for you."

"Don't be silly, Daniel. I'm here with you, and you just asked me to marry you, to be your wife. What could possibly be wrong with that? Listen, I really need to go, Daniel. I'll be right back." Sam slipped quickly from her seat and went straight to the lounge area of the rest room. Thank God, it was empty.

She started to give herself a lecture. "You can't cry, Sam. There is no way you could keep that from Daniel's eyes. So, don't you dare give in to tears. Why are you so surprised? Neither he nor Martouf, offered you anything but a fling. A—a roll in the hay, so to speak. No doubt, it would have been a long-term affaire, but evidently, it would never have gone any farther than that. Officially, that is."

She gave up on talking to herself, thinking furiously instead. No doubt, her position would have been as a sort of mistress or something. Acknowledged, but on the fringe, so to speak.

He had all the incentive in the worlds right now and he wasn't willing to take her as a mate. And, if he wasn't now, he would never have been before. She knew this; she just had to allow herself to admit it. There weren't even any words of love spoken that weekend. She had probably imagined that they said them against her skin, and in her hair. So many times, she'd thought she heard it whispered by Lantash—and Martouf.

Thinking about his behavior recently, she had to be honest with herself; Lantash had been drawing farther and farther away over the last several days. He had been holding her less and less often. He wasn't caressing her as often as he once had; he was no longer looking at her in the mirror as he had been; he was staying dormant more and more while she was awake.

Yet, he was spending more and more time with Daniel. With only a few weeks, possibly only days, left to be together, he was spending the time he was awake with Daniel, instead of with her. Surely, if he loved her as much as she thought he did, then he would be spending every last precious second with her, wouldn't he? And now—this. It was too much. He had to leave her. Soon, maybe even tomorrow. How quickly could they make the arrangements she wondered?

"Just calm down. Think logically, Sam. What's so bad about the position you're in? Lantash will be in Daniel soon, so you'll only have to hide your feelings about this for a few weeks or days at most, and if you can convince them to do it sooner maybe even less. Once he's gone then he'll never know how much it hurt you to realize he didn't want you for a mate. He wants you for a lover, a—a mistress. Accept that and learn to live with it. He wants this child and he wants Jolinar's memories. There are a lot of reasons why he wants to be with you. He does love you. You know that; you can feel it."

"Take it in stride and pull your pride around you. You can do this. You do have Daniel's love, and he wants you for his wife. Daniel loves you passionately and romantically. He'll cherish you and be there for you like a rock. You love him just as passionately. And even if he doesn't love you the same, Lantash does love you. A lot. You've felt how much he loves you. Something here doesn't make sense."

She'd find out when she went back to the table if Lantash wanted her as a wife. She shook her head. "No, I won't." She'd change the subject so that Daniel wouldn't be put on the spot trying to side step the fact that Lantash had no intention of bonding with or marrying her.

Sam frowned. But, hadn't Daniel mentioned putting this diamond into a bonding necklace? Yes, he had. But then, that was sometime in the future. No doubt, one of those futures that never quite materialized, and it was possible that Daniel didn't realize that himself.

"All right. Stop it, Sam. Deep breath. Smile. There. Better. What should they talk about when she got back to the table? Food. That would be good. I'll tell him I want—well, what do I want? Anything?"

How could she be hungry after all of the emotional upheaval? But she was! Did she really want that? It sounded really good, so she must. Okay, so lobster and shrimp it was. Seafood should be good for the babies, and it sounded wonderful to her.

She would simply put Lantash's betrayal—"oh, god—betrayal? Where had that come from? He had not betrayed her. He'd never promised her anything. Hadn't he? Hadn't Martouf? Had that weekend meant nothing to them? Less than nothing? Hadn't that entire weekend been one long promise? No. It wasn't. At least, not to the extent she had thought it was. Not to the point of a formal declaration."

"No, wait, that was just wrong. The love had been there. It had. It was. She could feel it all the time, washing over her, warming her, embracing her. She could feel both Lantash and Martouf's love of her. Something was not right here, but now wasn't the time to try to figure it out. Not now. Later."

"Stop that now, idiot woman. You are going in circles. Just stop." Sam crushed her internal merry-go-round of thoughts. She would put Lantash's—Lantash's what? His, his lack of deep love for her, to one side and live with what she had. He did love her, just not enough to take her as a formal mate acknowledged by the Tok'Ra ceremony. That could be the entire problem. It could be that they wouldn't accept her as his formal mate, and he knew that. But, Selmak had declared her to be their mates in the eyes of the Tok'Ra, and he had agreed, so that meant…"No. No more. There is a reasonable explanation. You aren't thinking clearly, so just stop it. Now."

Of course, she had thought of that earlier, and it could very well be that regardless what Selmak said. Perhaps the majority of the Tok'Ra wouldn't accept her. It shouldn't surprise her that they wouldn't want her as Lantash's mate. It could mean that he would leave them and come to Earth to live. No, they wouldn't want that to happen. He did love her. He did. She could feel it surrounding her, bathing her in its warmth. No, there was no doubt about the fact that Lantash loved her. She would figure this out later, much, much, later.

All right, Daniel would think she had been kidnapped if she didn't go back soon. Something wasn't right about this entire situation but she would not think anymore about it for now. She would not ruin this night for Daniel or for herself. She nodded to herself in the mirror and smiled. It would have to do. She opened the door and walked back out to greet her husband-to-be, once more on a more even keel. Things would work out. They had to.

"Sorry about that, Daniel. You haven't even started on your appetizer. We should probably try to eat them now don't you think?"

"Yes, I suppose we should," he murmured slowly, unsure of whether he should mention their previous conversation or not. "Are you ready to order?"

"Yes, actually, I am. I want Lobster and shrimp, baked potato and vegetable. Go ahead and order for me, Daniel. I don't care which way you have it prepared, as long as that's what I end up eating." Sam listened as Daniel ordered confidently. She wasn't sure what he had ended up ordering, since it had all been ordered in French, but she was sure that whatever it was, it would be good.

She looked across the table at the man she had just agreed to marry. Then she looked at her left hand where a beautiful diamond and sapphire ring glittered and caught the light. It was a lovely ring and she would cherish it. She wasn't sure she wanted whatever the other stone was. This one suited her just fine. Maybe once Daniel explained about it, she would decide to keep this one. But, that was for later, as well. For now, she had to keep the conversation away from anything that would lead back to the marriage question.

"So what is it we are doing tomorrow? Furniture shopping, right? Do you have any preference of style, Daniel?" Sam asked quickly, attempting to make sure that the conversation stayed well away from the topics that were discussed prior to her rush to the ladies' room.

Daniel looked up in surprise. They had talked about this a little the other night. Women were hard to understand sometimes. She had pulled up some websites and they had looked through some things. Lantash had been fascinated by shopping online. Both of them were expecting things to begin showing up on their doorstep anytime.

He frowned to himself as he listened to Sam. She was obviously not going to go back to the conversation they were having before she suddenly decided she had to go to the ladies' room again. That had been a blatant ploy to get away from him. But why? And what had she been talking about?

He would have to delve into this deeper, but she was doing her best to avoid it for now. She was probably right to do that if it would be a sensitive subject and, from her actions, he had a feeling it would be not only very sensitive, but that it would upset her very much. Therefore, he would let it pass for now, but he would be bringing it up later. Whatever it was had really upset her. He'd not allow that to happen.

He forced himself to return to the ordinary subjects she had introduced. Back to the furniture. So, they had found some mutual dislikes. And some mutual likes. Neither liked modern things in most furniture and they both liked solid wood.

There were some places that had antiques they both thought they might want to look at, and then there were some places that did handcrafted things that could be made to order. Both of them were interested in both.

He had his eye on a pair of bassinets that were intricately carved. He had fallen in love with them the moment he saw them. He thought that Lantash had, too. They could have a filmy curtain pulled all the way around them. The carvings were Celtic mixed with Baroque for an interesting design. The carvings were quite ornate and flowing. They were very unusual. They were done in cherry, which he considered a beautiful wood. He knew that Sam liked it, too, but she also really liked oak and walnut.

"I, um, I'd like to go take a look at the bassinets we saw online. I know we'd have to drive to Gunnison, but I'd really like to see them. What do you think?"

Sam smiled at him. "I think I like them, too, Daniel. And, the bassinets don't necessarily have to match the rest of the furniture in the room. They will be in other rooms most of the time anyway. So sure, I'd like to see their catalog and some of their other pieces. It would be great if they had cribs and dressing tables to match the bassinets but that would probably be too much to hope for."

"But they take special orders, Sam. Plus, we have nine months. Or almost that long. Eight and a half. I didn't know if you really liked that cherry or not."

"Cherry is beautiful, Daniel. I love cherry. I like several different woods. That's why my furniture didn't match. I could never decide on just one so I'd get one of these and two of those." She shrugged. "I'd love it if we could actually get everything in all one wood." She sighed, and then grinned ruefully, "Of course, I also really fell in love with the oak ones in that same design, too, you know."

Daniel laughed "I know. I kind of liked them, too." He nodded decisively. "Okay, then, in the morning we'll set out for Gunnison. It really isn't all that far away. It won't take too long to get there."

Sam nodded and wondered what to come up with next. "The shrimp cocktail is very good. But then, short of over or undercooking the shrimp there isn't all that much you can do wrong to it."

Daniel grinned at her. "That's true and it is good. I hope we get the meal soon though. I didn't get much lunch, and I'm starved."

"My personal time clock notified me every five minutes until I finally gave in and went to find something to eat just to quiet him. I swear Martouf was right about that. He really is the biggest mother hen I've ever seen."

"I imagine most of that is because of the babies though, don't you, Sam? Surely he wouldn't be that way all the time?"

Sam's grin was almost evil. "You'll just have to wait and see, won't you?"

Daniel frowned at her. "I hope you are just kidding me." Sam raised her eyebrows at him. "I mean, he can't nag all the time, it would drive you nuts." Sam smiled at him. "Come on, Sam, tell the truth, you're just trying to give me a hard time." Sam gave him a really superb who me look. "I'm doomed," he moaned. Sam laughed at him.

Her eyes lit up as the food arrived. She was really hungry now that she had pushed her earlier thoughts away and determined not to let her hurt over Lantash spoil her evening with Daniel. She would deal with that later. Much, much later.


Sam groaned and sat back in her chair. "Daniel, that was absolutely wonderful. But, then, so was your steak. I like the way you had it fixed."

Daniel looked at her in amusement. "I liked what I got to eat of it, too, Sam. Do you think you'll eat this much your entire pregnancy?" He teased her.

Sam's mouth dropped open. "I only had two bites, Daniel. That's hardly an entire steak. Furthermore, you ate two bites of my lobster and two bites of my shrimp. So you owe me two more bites before I'm even with you."

"Okay, I admit it. I owe you two bites. How about two bites of my desert? I'll order something chocolate."

"Desert? Daniel, are you insane? After that meal? Where would you like for me to put it because I can guarantee you that it will not fit inside me."

"We have to eat at least a couple of small pieces. To tell you the truth, they have an engagement cake that they give to couples that become engaged here. I chose the chocolate one, and it comes in a beautiful wooden box with our names and the date carved into it. They'll bring it as soon as they clear the table. I had them put Lantash's name on it as well, Sam. I think they assumed you were pregnant because I also had them add three bound by love. Ah, here it comes."

Sam looked at the beautiful Rosewood box and found herself very near to tears again. It was a beautiful creation. Beautifully carved around the edges, across the center in flowing script it said exactly what Daniel had said it would. Daniel Jackson, Samantha Carter, and Lantash. Three hearts bound by love. Then, today's date. All they ever had to do was look at it to remember the night he had asked her to marry him. It was wonderful.

She touched it almost reverently, and then looked up and into Daniel's eyes. "It's stunning, Daniel. Absolutely one of the loveliest things I have ever been given. Thank you for making this one of the most special nights of my life."

"You are worth it. You deserve this and so much more, Sam. You are the world to Lantash and me. Don't ever doubt that."

Sam smiled a little sadly. "I know you feel that way, Daniel, and I'm thankful for that. It will be enough, I promise you. It's more than I ever thought I'd ever have, and I feel truly blessed to have it."

Then deliberately changing the tone of the event she asked, "You said it is cake, so when do I get to at least see it?"

Daniel grinned and opened the box. Inside was a beautiful cake with deep blue icing and lots of flowers and trim. It was a wonderful cake that rivaled the box for detailed loveliness. Sam smiled at it.

"It's too pretty to cut, Daniel. We'll have to just freeze it and take it out and look at it every so often."

"No, this is getting eaten. Now that I've seen it the first pieces are due to hit bottom, before we ever get home."

Sam smiled at him and sat back to watch as he discretely let the waiter know that they were ready to have the cake cut and served. When he arrived at the table, Daniel quickly indicated the size pieces he preferred.

He really was a very well-versed and cosmopolitan man. At home in any company, from desert caravans to Presidential dinners, he could fit in wherever he needed too. So many people underestimated him, and it was truly a shame that he was not more appreciated than he was.

He would know from now on that she appreciated him and every man that he was from the sheik to the ambassador. They were both surprised when the waiter gave them pictures of the cake, the box, and them. They both smiled at the little added extra piece of memorabilia.

They ate their cake in silence, but Sam continued to trace the names on the lid. Daniel and Samantha. Somehow, she couldn't bring herself to add Lantash's into it. She wasn't surprised that it hadn't dawned on Daniel that Lantash was not truly joining with them in this marriage.

She smiled sadly, wondering if Lantash would one day wish to change hosts. She hoped not. Daniel would enjoy living into the future to see how things progressed. She really didn't believe that Lantash would want to change hosts either. She needed to stop being so ridiculous.

She was brought back from her thoughts by Daniel's voice. "Sam, are you sure you're all right? Sam? Sam?"

"What? I'm sorry, Daniel, I was just thinking about the future. How much more you'd get to see than you would as you are now. How many more years you'll have to discover, study, and learn. You'll like that. I'm looking forward to watching you enjoy it."

Daniel nodded, saying, quietly, "Yes, I am looking forward to that, but even more than that, I'm looking forward to being with you and discovering and learning by your side. I do love you, Sam. Very, very much."

Sam's breath caught at the look of love on Daniel's face and in his eyes. The pure goodness and sweetness of his expression and voice. Tears sprang into her eyes as she felt her love of him rolling through her in waves. She nodded. "I know, Daniel, and I love you. I know that I always will, and I'm looking forward to spending the next couple of hundred years with you by my side." She blinked the tears away and smiled at him.

He smiled back and then looked at his watch. It was time they were headed home. "Are you ready to go, Sam?"

"Yes, of course, Daniel. I'm ready to go whenever you are." Daniel had realized that she was tired before she had. She covered a yawn and then looked at him sheepishly. He grinned at her.

He held her chair as she stood, and then he took her hand to help her through the restaurant to the front. He had taken care of the bill while they had their dessert, so they were ready to go. Holding the doors for her, they were soon on their way to his Jeep.

"That was an absolutely wonderful meal, Daniel, and the appetizer was wonderful as well. I will cherish the memories of this evening always." Sam kissed his cheek softly and held her hand out so that her ring would catch what light there was, and it did so very well. She admired it, thinking again what good taste Daniel had.

It took little time to reach home once they started that direction. It was still fairly early when they arrived there. Daniel took the cake into the kitchen, and then followed Sam up the stairs and into their bedroom. She had slipped on one of his favorite gowns. She already had the matching wrap on, but he helped her out of it before surprising her by swinging her up into his arms and carrying her to the bed. "You make me want to ravish you when you wear that, Sam of my Heart. But I think I'll get out of these clothes first."

Sam nodded and Daniel got up and proceeded to get ready for bed. "I'm going down to check the doors, Sam, I don't remember if I locked them."

"All right, Daniel, I'll wait here until you return." She quickly went to the bathroom. It was a shame his gallant gesture had to be undone, but if she hurried, he would never know she left the bed. She settled among the pillows and almost immediately dozed off. When Daniel returned, Lantash was waiting for him.

"How did the evening go, Daniel? Did she agree to bond with us? To marry us?"

Daniel smiled. "She agreed to marry us, so I assume she agreed to bond with us. It's the same thing isn't it?"

"Yes, and no, Daniel. It is similar, but they are two separate ceremonies unless we deliberately combine them. Which we could do, but not without her agreement to go through both first."

Daniel nodded. "All right. I'll be sure to ask her. Or you could if you want to. It probably would mean more from you."

"As you wish. I will be quite happy to do so. I am going to allow Samantha to awaken now."

Daniel agreed and watched as Sam opened her eyes and yawned delicately. He stretched out next to her, touched the ring on her finger, and smiled. "So, are you ready to hear why this is just a temporary ring?"

"Well, you can tell me, but I might decide to keep this one, Daniel. You picked it out and that makes it special."

"The other one will be special too, Sam, very special. It will be from Martouf, Lantash, and I. All three of us."

Sam stiffened, but she said nothing. Her fingers traced the design on the comforter. She nodded her indication that she was listening. Daniel frowned but decided that perhaps she knew it was going to hurt.

"You asked me before if the reason this ring was temporary had something to do with Martouf, and well, yes, it does. Martouf has a Marquis cut blue diamond that is very beautiful. He always wanted to give it to the woman he loved. Jolinar and Rosha didn't care for the cut of it, or the stone itself, so they refused it when they bonded."

Sam held up her hand, and Daniel stopped talking for a moment before saying, "Please don't cry, Sam. Lantash and I both want you to have it, and we know that Martouf would want you to have it. Someday, it will go to his son if he wants it. Sam, please, don't cry."

Sam looked up and into Daniel's eyes, "I'm not crying, Daniel. I'm sure it is a lovely stone, but I prefer the one that you gave to me. It was given to me by a man who I know for sure has a very true and deep love for me. One that wants me for a wife, that wants to bind himself to me, and who will be proud of me. I want the reminder of that, not a reminder of a love that—"

Sam shook her head at Daniel and smiled at him. "I want your ring, Daniel, the one that came to me with love." She kissed him gently and then laid down. "I'm very tired, Daniel. If you don't mind, I believe I am going to go to sleep now."

Daniel looked bewildered. Sam had not appeared to be upset. Now she was rolling over and lying with her back to him. What had happened? Something was wrong. He had known it from the moment she had suddenly decided she needed to go to the ladies' room again. She had been upset. What had they been talking about? He had asked her to marry him. She had said yes immediately. Then she had asked if he didn't need to ask her another question for Lantash.

He had been totally surprised by the question. Then she had almost spelled it out for him before she stopped herself and her entire face had changed. A look of suddenly realizing something had been followed by an expression of intense pain. Then she had shut down and headed for the ladies' room.

His brilliant mind finally made the leap of logic and connected the dots. He and Lantash were both idiots, of course. She had expected them both to ask her. One for each ceremony. The question now was, how did he get to Lantash without her knowing about it. He wondered if the word would still work? All he could do was try it. "Lanaekqa Aroriesh"

Sam turned back to him. "Did you say something, Daniel? I think I was almost asleep."

"M-m, no, nothing, Sam. Go to sleep, love."

Within a few minutes, she was asleep and Lantash was asking Daniel want he wished to know. "I don't wish to know anything, Lantash, but I think that you should know that Sam refused the blue diamond and she wouldn't even let me finish telling her about it."

Lantash stared at him. "So, are you trying to tell me she no longer loves us? I do not believe you."

Daniel grumbled. "No, that is not what I am trying to say to you. I'm trying to tell you that you need to get your speech ready for in the morning, so that you can propose or whatever you call it when you ask your choice of mate to bond with you."

"I think that if you do a little digging in Sam's memories you'll be shocked by some of the conclusions she drew tonight. It's my belief that she's somehow got it in her head that you don't love her enough to want her as a mate, and that you and Martouf never planned on bonding with her. That all you wanted was a brief affaire. Lantash? Lantash?"

Lantash groaned, "I do not understand the female mind, Daniel. There is nothing, nothing, in here that should have led her to that conclusion until after you did not ask her to bond with us. Only then did she begin to put completely unrelated things together to come up with a totally inaccurate set of circumstances. It is impossiblecompletely, absolutely impossible—to follow a woman's thinking."

"We should have thought of this, though, Lantash. I didn't even get it when she practically told me. Then, of course, she realized that if she had to tell me, then she didn't want it. They may be irrational at times, but they nearly always come up with the correct answer for the question they have posed. What conclusions has she drawn, Lantash?"

Lantash sounded bleak as he read her thoughts and relived the pain she had felt. "She feels betrayed by me. She believes that our weekend together was no more than a sexual fling for Martouf and me."

"She," he sighed, "She believes that the Tok'Ra would not approve of her, so I will not go against them. She believes that I do not love her enough to do so. She also believes that I do not love her enough to want to take her as a formally bonded mate." Lantash shook his head. "I do not know how she could believe these things, Daniel, for none of them are even remotely true. How could she believe them?" He frowned before continuing, "She is also feeling very confused, though, as she feels that we loved her, that I still love her."

"Doesn't she come up with reasons for believing them, Lantash?" Daniel asked, and then waited for Lantash to find the relevant memories.

"Yes, she has brought forward many supporting theories, most of which are true, but not for the reasons she has attached to them. She thinks I have been touching her less. That is true, but it is not because I do not love her, it is because of the sexual feelings from which I am trying to protect her."

"She says I am staying dormant more and not spending time with her. That, also, is true, for the same basic reasons. She thinks I am spending more time with you and less with her even though we will soon be parted and every second we have together should be precious to us."

His voice was anguished, "Daniel, she does not realize that it will already shatter her to part from me, and I from her. Every precious moment we spend in each other's company now is binding us more closely together. It is not that I do not want to be with her, but that I know how much it is going to hurt her, us, when we part."

He sighed disconsolately. "So the reasons themselves are true, in as much as they are true statements, but they are not true for the reasons she has assigned to them and have nothing to do with our binding. I do not know what to say to her, Daniel. I do not know what to do for her to help her understand."

"She'll understand the truth, Lantash. She'd rather know the real reasons than to have you do things and not tell her why. She may have understood intuitively before and until this happened. But now, every self-doubt she's ever had is rushing back."

"Now that we know what she's thinking, I'm not sure you should let it pass until morning. You've lulled her to sleep now, but she's bound to wake during the night with this on her mind. I'd almost bet that first thing in the morning she'll be telling me that she thinks we should get the transfer over as soon as possible. She's going to want to have you out of there before you realize she knows that you don't want her."

"Yes, of course she will. There is little reason to put it off much longer, Daniel. I have healed much faster than I anticipated by staying dormant more than I thought I would. The little ones are resting firmly and doing well. I assume that next week or the week after could see us making the transfer." Lantash still sounded desolate.

"Lantash, what is it? What's wrong? All you have to do is allow her to wake up and talk to her. Tell her that you can't wait until tomorrow to ask her for yourself and that you have to know tonight, if she will agree to bond with you as well as marry you."

"We must hope she does not realize I know what happened tonight. If she suspects that we realize what happened, she may begin to believe any number of erroneous things once again."

"I suppose that is possible, but I don't think she will if we both talk to her. I'll snuggle up to her, and you allow her come awake easily, alright?"

Lantash sighed in resignation, "Yes, I can allow her to awaken in that manner. As for the other, I will try, Daniel, but I believe she will think that I am telling her untruths."

Daniel snuggled down into the bed and spooned up against Sam. He breathed in her scent and his body responded immediately. He groaned to himself. Maybe he shouldn't have offered to help Lantash or he should have offered from across the bed. "You will do fine, Lantash. Give her time to wake up."

No answer was forthcoming so Daniel assumed that Sam was awakening. He didn't move, remaining still as if he was simply cuddling her in the night. She shifted as if to get more comfortable. He knew when Lantash began talking to her from the way she moved her head. She was listening to him, at least. That was good.

"My love, you are awake. Can you not sleep?"

"I'm fine, Lantash, don't worry about it. I'm sure I'll go back to sleep in a minute. Daniel probably moved and woke me or something. Goodnight."

She was very determined to ignore him. He began to hum tunelessly as he often did when something excited him. It took only a short time before Sam sighed, then asked, "Lantash, why are you humming?"

"I am excited. I always hum when I am excited. I do not think I can wait until morning to find out your answer." Now he sounded slightly nervous. "What, um, what answer did you give to Daniel, beloved? Are you going to marry us?"

He felt the jump in her heartbeat as she heard the word us, but he also felt and heard her force herself not to be stupid, it did not mean anything.

"I told Daniel I would marry him, yes," she told him slowly.

Lantash frowned at her. "Are you not marrying me as well, my Samantha?" The hurt in his voice was palatable.

Sam hesitated before smiling at him and saying, "Well, of course, I am. You two are kind of a package deal, you know. Two for the price of one. Marry one, get the other free, so to speak."

Sam felt his pain blossom outward toward her, but didn't understand it. He was the one that didn't want her, not the other way around.

"I see. And is that how you will feel about Daniel during our bonding ceremony? Will you feel that he is just excess baggage along because he must be in order for me to be there?"

This time the pain moved sharply from her to him. Their guess had been correct, then.

Before she could answer, he continued, "Or were you even planning on accepting me? Am I good enough only as a bedmate, but not a permanent partner? Perhaps, your intentions towards Martouf and me were never more than just an affaire. You never planned on becoming our bonded mate."

He felt her anger and the underlying hurt begin to simmer at that remark and stopped speaking, realizing he might have pushed too far. Anger had not been his goal, but perhaps it would help cleanse the hurt.

"You never asked. You still haven't asked. All you've done is leave me alone with my memories more and more. You weren't even there when Daniel asked me to marry him. You went to sleep, probably so that you could take the time, while I was occupied with something that wasn't important to you, to do some more healing, so you could leave me faster. Then you could talk to Daniel when I wasn't aware of it. And, when I am awake and aware, Daniel's around, and he can touch me so you don't have to. Leave me alone, Lantash, just leave me alone."

"Sam? Sam, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" Daniel asked, alarmed, when he realized that the conversation was not going well.

"I'm crying because Lantash hates me," Sam turned over and clutched at Daniel's chest, which was now getting quite wet. He reached over her for the tissues on the nightstand. He was really glad they'd put them around everywhere.

"Lantash? Does someone want to tell me what's going on?"

"She told me she wasn't marrying me, Daniel. I am only excess baggage that she must take to get you. She also says I never asked her to bond with me. Therefore, she is not bonding with me. I am the one that she hates. Goodnight."

"I don't believe this. I have two seven year olds in my bed with me." Daniel ground out.

"Are you saying I'm acting like a child, Daniel?" Sam asked, surprised.

"I'm saying that you are both upset and not even listening to one another. Listen to yourselves. And Lantash you'd better not be dormant where you can't hear me, or your ass is grass."

"He's grumbling."

"Good. Sam, why are you being this way? You know that Lantash loves you more than anything in any world in the universe. How can you possibly say he hates you? You know better than that. Maybe he didn't come right out and ask you with the words, but you've known all along that he intended to bond with you. From the first weekend that you were together. Haven't you? Sam?"

Sam looked up at Daniel and her eyes filled with tears again, "I thought he did, Daniel. I thought they both did. But now, he never asked me. And, he didn't tell you to ask me either. If he really meant to, wouldn't he have done it at the same time?"

Daniel's head dropped. Taking a deep breath, he raised his head and looked directly at her, asking, "Sam, why do you think his name was on the box? We were both asking you to marry us. Why do you think I told you about the bonding necklace that the stone from that ring will go into? That was from both of us. Your engagement ring will be from all three of us. Lantash, Martouf, and I. Did it occur to you that maybe he wanted to wait until the transfer so he could ask you to bond with him and see you when he asked?"

Sam shook her head. "Is that why, Daniel? Why didn't he just say so?"

"I don't know, Sam. But why are you jumping to the conclusion that he didn't ask because he doesn't love you? You know better. You know he loves you. Whatever reasons you came up with to convince yourself otherwise are wrong. I don't even have to know what they are to know that they are wrong."

"Then why is he spending less and less time with me, Daniel? Why doesn't he touch me like he used to?"

"Because he knows how hard it's going to be on both of you when he leaves you, and he's trying to make it less painful by distancing you both from each other, so the shock won't be so great. Sam, Lantash loves you. You know that I would never lie to you."

Sam searched his eyes and found what she needed there. She laid her head on his shoulder and drew a shaky breath. "Daniel, why doesn't he trust me enough to just tell me these things?"

Daniel smiled into her hair. "He's like most guys, Sam. We just do things, we fix things; we don't talk it to death, we just do it. We aren't used to explaining why we do stuff. I know; both of us are going to have to practice on that. I promise we will. Now. Has he apologized to you for hurting you yet?"

"No, he is sulking, and I have the impression that he thinks I owe him an apology for insinuating he was so much excess baggage."

Daniel frowned. "Sam, I think this is just a matter of several misunderstandings. I'm going to talk to Lantash, probably privately, because there are a few things he needs to hear about earth customs, that you already know, and I don't want to bore you."

"It won't bore me to be shut inside my own mind?"

"You'll figure out something to do. Lantash, I want to talk to you. Alone. And now, not next week."

Lantash came forward and glared at him. "What is it that you believe I wish to hear you tell me, Daniel?"

"Not long ago, you were afraid she was lost to you forever. Now you're upset and angry with her. So, which is it? You love her or you don't."

"I love her. However, she called me luggage. Almost."

Daniel pinched the bridge of his nose and mumbled something in a language that Lantash did not recognize. He frowned at him again.

"You will go back inside your head with your mate. You will apologize for everything, and you will then ask her to bond with us. Do you understand?"

"Why?"

"Because on Earth, that is how it is done."

Lantash blinked at him. "But she insulted me."

"And you hurt her before she insulted you." He paused for a moment. "Okay. Basic Earth communications 101. When you are in my body and an argument happens, and we were right, but someone has to give in first and apologize, what are you going to do?"

"We shall wait on Samantha to apologize, of course."

"Wrong answer."

"Why is it the wrong answer? If we are correct then we should wait."

Daniel nodded. "Lantash, do you like sex?"

"Yes. Very much." He scowled at Daniel.

"Very much. I see. And you like to have sex really often, like, oh, at least daily if not several times a day, if you possibly can?"

"Certainly."

"Then you will learn to apologize whether you were wrong or not. Otherwise, you will spend a great many nights on your own side of the bed, wishing Sam wasn't so stubborn. And Lantash, Earth women and sex are a lot like camels and water. They can go for weeks without it, and it doesn't seem to bother them at all."

There was a rather abrupt, though short silence before Lantash spoke, "Other than asking that she become our bond-mate, what is it that you wish for me to say to Samantha, Daniel? I will do my best."

TBC