Deadeye
Special Chapter – The Man Known as Hachiman
[Nagisa]
Hikigaya Hachiman. Aside from Kayano, he's the only male transfer student that had transferred into the E-Class, and to be frank, I don't know much about him. I've heard Nakamura-san talk about him transferring from Chiba a few times back in the past (they were friends, apparently. Who knew?), so now we know where he came from (which is pretty far), but not much else. It seems that Nakamura-san wanted a monopoly on the information about him, and so it was up to me to discover what exactly makes Hikigaya-san work.
Although, given his intense paranoia about his surroundings, I can't just sneak around unless I want to be found out. Which is why, a direct approach is needed in dealing with him, "Hikigaya-san?"
The mess of dark hair perked up at the mention of his name, slowly craning upwards to look at me as his dull gray eyes widened at the sight of me. Probably out of curiosity, nostalgia, or anything else in between, really. Like I said, I don't know that much about him.
Which is why the best approach is to be direct towards him, "Hikigaya-san, do you already have a group for the school trip?"
His eyes widened in surprise as he blinked at me for a few times, his eyes shifting from the phone that he held in his hands and me until he finally eked out an answer in response, "...Sorry. I already have a group that I'm in."
Now it was my turn to widen my eyes. Someone invited him to be a part of their group? No offense to Hikigaya-san, but I feel like he's one of those people that have no presence whatsoever in the room, so it must've been nearly impossible for someone to strike up a conversation with him without feeling weirded out by his presence. Add to the fact that he wasn't really much of a conversation starter means that not a lot of people talk to him that much.
...Wow, I just sounded really condescending back there. I'm sorry Hikigaya-san, but I'm sure that you can find the time and place to forgive me in your heart. I'm just stating the unbiased truth here, after all.
"Eh? Who?" Came my measured reply as Hikigaya-san once again blinked, intending on making it slow as possible in order for him to buy some time before he speaks. I knew what he did. I do it sometimes as well, when I'm faced with a question from Korosensei that I didn't know from the get-go.
"...Chiba and the others."
...Now that's really unexpected. Chiba-san usually doesn't talk all that much, and if he took it upon himself to ask Hikigaya-san to join their group...that means that Chiba-san really wanted Hikigaya-san to be in his group, didn't he? Ah well, I guess it can't be helped. I'll just ask one of Chiba-san's groupmates later about him.
And so, I have no more people to ask to be a part of my group in the school trip. I think.
...Though, Karma-kun's still here, so I guess I'll ask him.
[Karma]
Hikigaya. Just the name brings to mind those cold dead eyes that I've seen quite a couple of times during those rare moments wherein we had actually worked together for the greater good (lol) of the world. It's quite a bit obvious to check into his background to see if I could gouge out some kind of blackmail to use against him.
Having that kind of guy working under you is a godsend, after all. He's those types of people that are extremely lazy, and thus would do everything in their power to make sure that they would stay that way. Quite a genius on my part, but he also lacks the usual 'holier-than-thou' attitude that most of those geniuses exude, and seems quite content with just taking the backseat and letting others do the thinking and work for him.
Seriously, the guy's a good recruit for a company. Though, I guess that his dream was just some kind of mundane rambling that most people wouldn't even think about doing. Like an editor, for example. Or a chef. Or a househusband. The last one is the most mundane out of all of them.
Which is why I'm pretty sure that Hikigaya's going to do whatever it takes to make sure that he's going to be a househusband in the future. His determination is just simply outstanding, I could tell.
Since I have nothing to do for the moment, I just let my eyes observe the new transfer student, observing that he values his sleep more rather than socializing with other people. Though, considering that he got only one mistake in the entire midterms, I think that he spends the rest of his time studying. Quite late, if he had the gall to sleep in class.
Makes you think that there was no way that his only mistake in the entire midterms was a Science question about 'inherited traits'. But then again, maybe talking about it was enough to grind his gears so much that he made a mistake when it comes to that question?
...Hm. Better take a note, just in case. Like Nagisa's notes on Korosensei's weaknesses, I'll also be listing Hikigaya's weaknesses in another notepad. It's a much better use of time rather than just playing around like the others, and it sure is a good help in identifying potential weaknesses that I could use for blackmail.
Here's what I've gotten so far:
[1 – He's antisocial.]
[2 – His eyes look like a dead fish that's been through a thorough squeezing.]
[3 – He is apparently sensitive about his eyes.]
[4 – He is easily distracted by cute-looking boys or beautiful women.]
[5 – He stores his pornographic material in his PS Vita. (footnote: Although it seems that the number that I find every day seems to be decreasing at a steady pace. Going through a phase or something?)]
They're the only things that I had gotten so far, but it's already a treasure trove of information. I could use Nagisa to distract him for a long time while I pry away his secrets, and I could blackmail him about the pornographic content on his handheld. Although, I need to work with the latter suggestion quickly since I'm sure that his entire collection would be gone by the end of the week.
I sighed, keeping one eye open in close watch of him as I couldn't help but shake my head at him. To take down an experienced member of the military with a move like that – sure, it was a given that he had lost the first few rounds, but still, it was a valid win...Something must've happened to him that made him into that way. Along with his eyes, that's for sure.
Though, I don't want to get shot by a BB gun in the nuts like Okajima, so I'll not be going through the direct route for a moment. Besides, I'm not Nagisa, and I'm not like Kanzaki – he's just going to see through my intentions with a single glance and then I'm screwed.
So, a cute boy and a beautiful girl. Hikigaya's got high standards, but if it's the price to pay for letting him slip something out, then I guess I could persuade Nagisa and Kanzaki in order to help me out. The two of them are curious about the guy, after all.
Especially the latter.
[Kanzaki]
Hikigaya Hachiman. If I were to say something about him, then I guess...I'm a little curious?
...It sounded like I was speaking for someone else for a moment there, but it seems that I was wrong. Still, my curiosity about him remains, and nothing's going to change that. Sure, he was cranky, he was crass, and had the delicacy of a bus hitting a wall at high speeds, but what mostly made interested me about him were his eyes and his sharp mind.
And to be frank, I'm already at an impasse. Any attempts to talk to him have me stonewalled by him acting like he was asleep. And my position in this class halted any, all, and further attempts to try and go out of my way and talk to him. I'm pretty sure that the boys are going to have a little bit of a panic attack if they saw me associating with Hikigaya-kun, after all.
Maybe he was testing me. Challenging me if I could change myself for the better by breaking down the façade that I have and showing my true self to the rest of the class. But I knew that I couldn't do it. Mostly because that I had no courage to do so. Unlike him.
I had heard of a few snippets of what he was like before he transferred here, courtesy of me eavesdropping onto him when he was sent to the clinic after that one particular game of Koro-ball. A pariah. An outcast. A creep. A recluse. He was bullied by others after failing a confession, forced into the spotlight even though he was unaccustomed to it due to his societal anxiety. There, he was verbally and mentally degraded by scathing words and rebukes, put on a pedestal for all in order to make an example out of him. He was shown as a pariah, and was societally stoned for it, and at the end of it all, he had finally cracked and clamped his heart shut, the same way that he physically did for the rest of the world around him.
But now, here he was. He was still unable to hold a conversation for too long, and the dead eyes that he had gotten as a result of the various affairs in his past middle school were still there, but lately, he was looking better. That slouch of his was almost nonexistent now, and quite a few of us were surprised after he came in with his back ramrod straight. He stood higher than Terasaka-san. If it wasn't that much of a difference, then I don't know what would.
Not only that, but his eyes were getting a bit livelier lately. Sure, on the surface almost no one would notice it, but stare at his eyes long enough and you'll see the little twitches and movements that showcased the emotions that he always hides under that poker face of his. Of course, it wasn't as if I was staring at his eyes for an unhealthy amount of time, but I could still see the minor differences when I put my mind to it. They weren't just blank anymore – they were filled with something, and apparently that was enough for him to continue living; to continue going to classes every day without the fear of getting shamed for his past deeds, and to continue on pursuing something. Once again...that 'something', I did not know.
He was always a step ahead of the rest of us. I knew that he had taken off Korosensei's arm during that one time wherein we ambushed him all with BB guns, using the lag time in between Korosensei's movements in order to fire at a slightly different time than the rest of his peers and thus creating a blind spot that he could capitalize. I also knew that he had taken down Karasuma-sensei with a hidden weapon that almost no one saw until it was too late – he was so devoted to taking our PE teacher down that he even took an elbow to the groin in order to keep up the masquerade. He could also read our intent in between the lines, and figure out what was happening in the room in the get-go, and act accordingly to the information that he had gleaned, and he seemed to have a good grasp in his people-reading and academic skills. The midterms should've already proven that by beyond the shadow of a doubt.
All because he had the courage to step forward. Courage that he had gotten due to meeting some people for sure, like Korosensei, Nakamura-san, and dare I say it – me. He had gotten the courage that he had needed in order to take a step forward by piercing through my façade and seeing me for the desperate little girl that I am. He took a step forward, seeing that if he stood still and let things happen impassively, then he would turn out exactly like me, keeping up appearances in order to please everyone.
He didn't bother whether or not people's opinions of him were good or bad – he simply assumed the worst and kept on trudging forwards on his own path, ignoring the opinions of those around him and only believing in what he truly believed was right. That was the manifestation of his courage – the seemingly abstract concept that had imbued life into his dead eyes and made him take a step forward of his own volition.
And even though I should be grateful for the first classmate who had seemingly given him the first step towards achieving that courage, all I could feel was empty and hollow jealousy. For I was not the one who had figured him out; outlined all of his wants and fears into separate boxes and sifting through them to find out his actual personality; got to know him better by forcefully trapping him in conversations that he couldn't escape so that he could have a chance at an opportunity and grow...It was not me who had done all those sorts of things. It was not me, Kanzaki Yukiko, who had broken through the walls around him and showed him the first out of many steps that he had to take in order to gather his courage and move forward.
It was not me who did that. Instead, it was Nakamura Rio who solely deserves the credit for that.
[Nakamura]
Sunday was a mess that I hoped would be erased from my mind.
Should I have just told him back there and then? That I had gotten my emotions worked up on that Saturday and knocked his head after finding out that he had went on a supposed date with Kanzaki-san? Should I have just told him back then and there that he needed to retrieve the bonnet that I had bought for him since it was a memory for me that I wouldn't let to fade into nothingness?
Nevermind what I had to say, the damage was already done. He already thinks of our supposed friendship as 'compensated'. A give-and-take relationship that shows nothing but an empty void beyond that. A relationship that values a material thing such as a bonnet rather than the thoughts and memories that the object brought with it.
His eyes were slowly getting better, and his smiles – as thin as they were – were now increasing in frequency. But then again, here was my subconscious, ready to jack everything up in a moment's notice. And I had lost control.
Conflict should drive a friendship forward. But even if I believe in that whole-heartedly, Hachiman would obviously prattle on about his usual philosophy and come up with a conclusion that was nonsensical at best and outright annoying at worst.
But if I think about it from Hachiman's perspective, it all made sense. He had objectively valued Kanzaki-san's trust over the retrieval of his memories. Any sane, logical person would obviously make that choice. One would obviously cherish something that was present in front of them rather than a vague, obscure mess that might not even exist. Hachiman was a logical person to the core. Of course he would choose Kanzaki-san's trust over his own well-being. He was also that kind of self-sacrificing person, after all.
Still...knowing his line of thinking hurt. The fact that he was willing to throw out the human variable out of the equation without a single objection made me feel hurt. It made me think that maybe whatever kind of friendship we had was nothing more than just a series of variables and equations to him – that he might not even see 'me' on the other side of the blackboard. That thought made me scared, made me release my inner fears all in one go, and at the end of the day, I had hurt him with my words and actions. It was his apartment, yet I had slammed the door on his face. Twice. Once from his perspective, since he couldn't remember what happened on that Saturday.
I saw his usual poker face, but unlike what I had seen from earlier times wherein I literally can't get a read off of him, now cracks of emotions started to show through. Anger. Frustration. Annoyance...Regret? Sadness? Pain?
"It's not like losing it would be so detrimental to us being...well, whatever kind of relationship that we have anyway. Acquaintances, right?"
Ah, that was the reason why I finally slammed the door on him. The word 'acquaintances'. Somehow, just hearing the word again was enough to make me frown. Acquaintances. After all this time, Hachiman still thinks that he and I are still acquaintances. Are acquaintances someone who let you drag them around like they were some kind of ragdolls? Are acquaintances someone you share your thoughts to? Are acquaintances someone you trust wholeheartedly to let out the darkest secrets that reside inside your heart, and cry out your hopes, fears, and dreams on?
...Do people who do that simple call themselves 'acquaintances'?
But then again, I could only grit my teeth and watch. If I had a chance of reconciling with him, then I need to find out the reason why he still thought of me as his acquaintance. Was it only really because that he thought that I was more bothered over the fact that I was more concerned about the actual bonnet itself rather than the thought that came with it?
Yes. That was simply the reason why. If it was Hachiman, then it always comes down towards the simple reasons. But...
...Just how do I talk to him about this? Do I ask Korosensei for help?
[Korosensei]
...As usual, Hikigaya-kun is sleeping in the middle of class. But once again, I ignored it and continued on teaching. After all, even though he looks like he's sleeping, he's actually the one paying the most attention out of all my students.
At first, I thought that Hikigaya-kun was just like Karma-kun – a prideful young man who always flaunted his skills towards others, but never sharpened them. However, I was proven wrong by the man himself. Hikigaya-kun was far away from Karma-kun, mostly because of the fact that he has no pride in his skills. He always thinks of himself as lower than everyone else, and therefore acts like a nobody who thinks that he wields a rusty blade, but never realizes that he wielded a reliable blade that can cut through anything with enough effort and skill.
...Or once again, so I thought. As of late, I only realized that he fully knew the extent of his abilities, but didn't want to show what he's capable of to other people aside from himself. Was it because he inherently has a lazy side to him? Or because he wanted to hide something from his peers?
Hm...I think I've got an inkling of exactly what's going on in Hikigaya-kun's mind, but I need someone who's always talking to him every day in order for me to have some kind of breakthrough. Like Nakamura-san.
Though, seeing them today...I'm thinking that something happened between them. Or was it just my imagination? But Hikigaya-kun's been releasing this 'don't talk to me' aura ever since the first period, so I'm pretty sure that something happened between the two of them. But was it too much to ask directly?
...Heh, maybe I could just snoop around for a while and find out the cause during the field trip. It's one of the main benefits of having Mach 20 speed, after all.
Although, if it seems that Hikigaya-kun's relationship with Nakamura-san is strained, then that means that I have to step in and...do what, exactly? Conflict is essential for a person's growth. If it means that both Hikigaya-kun and Nakamura-san would grow from this experience, then I wouldn't even dare step in.
But if things take a turn for the worse over the school trip...then I might consider stepping in and doing something. That I can be sure of. But for now, all I can do is observe. Observe and watch, and try to form some kind of idea as to what happened to Hikigaya-kun's situation.
Ha...And here I thought that I might be on the verge of some kind of breakthrough here...I think I'll just bide my time and see how things go in the future instead of fussing about the present.
It's only two months since the school year started, after all. I'm sure that I could manage to know all of my students by the time that the school year ends. Even though at least one of them is so adamant that his private life be not exposed into the public. I was about to figure out whatever his past was before he transferred here, but unfortunately I was forced to retreat by the hail of BB bullets that Nakamura-san had apparently fired at my position. Seriously, how does Hikigaya-kun know where I am each and every single time? Does he always keep a watch on me everywhere? Or does he have some kind of tracking device on me that I couldn't even notice?
Scary. Hikigaya-kun is scary. Just what is it with those senses of his? That's just plain scary.
I end my lesson for today, seeing the rest of my class file out the doors in order to respectively change into their gym uniforms, and my eyes moved towards Hikigaya-kun's seat, seeing his lazy eyes locking with mine. His glasses were skewed, signifying that he had actually slept during my class, which was quite a rare occurrence nowadays that I felt a little bit shocked.
"Sensei", he said, his voice barely above a whisper as I made a conscious effort to listen to his words, "...Don't you go dare snooping around on the field trip, alright?"
How can he read my mind!?
[Karasuma]
Once again, I am treated to Hikigaya Hachiman's performance in my class, and I just can't help but feel a little bit appalled by his actions. Sparring with him was just like dealing with a machine – too efficient, too controlled, but then once you think you have gotten his pattern and you think you can win, he immediately changes his approach to that of a human one, and quickly uses the opportunity to strike his opponent down.
I still remembered the first time that he had beaten me, when I hadn't shown my true capabilities yet in front of the E-Class. He was methodological in his approach – never extending too much unless he wanted to learn something about me. Each and every single defeat that he had suffered under my hands was a chance for him to learn about the timing of my strikes, how long it took for my strikes to land, and most important of all – how and when do I throw my strikes around. After his initial win against me, he has been on a roll, and ever since then I was already having trouble keeping up with him.
He would be a good recruit for the military in the future...if only he were to do away with his faux persona of being a lazy kid.
Ping!
...Though, if I were to praise him more than I already should have, then it would be due to his stellar marksmanship. At the third week that we started PE after I showed them the basics of training, I tested their initial ability in marksmanship to fire a BB gun while in range. Most of the class was in the predicted range, with the only outliers being three people. And out of those three people, one was also another outlier.
I didn't have to say his name again, do I? Hikigaya had just straight out murdered the rest of the competition with a score of 498 out of 500. And the two stray misses were due to him being distracted by his other classmates who had no idea of what 'personal space' meant. Be it with a pistol or a rifle, his marksmanship was already on the level of an accomplished sniper. Plus, with his ability to track and predict his target's motions and the lack of hesitation when on the trigger, it's frankly quite terrifying to be the one standing on the other side of his sights.
Ping!
Not only does he have his terrifying shooting ability, he also keeps track of his immediate surroundings like a hawk, and can immediately adapt to whatever situation he's placed in or in accordance to his comrade's movements. At the slightest hint of the rest of his classmates moving, he had immediately changed his firing pattern to walk towards a death trap, where the majority of the E-Class was waiting.
That would not do. Three or four people I can handle, but against fifteen or so people all charging towards you at once, I can only think that I would suffer the same fate as Julius Caesar.
Which meant that there was only one thing left to do in order to escape this encirclement: to break through the weakest link of the circle and surge on forward. Although, the only thing that made Hikigaya the 'weakest link' of the chain was only because he was alone. Not because his capability was far behind the other members of the E-Class – quite the opposite, actually.
Ping!
As if sensing my intentions, another BB pellet once again whizzed past me, cracking against the bark of the tree that I was currently using as cover as I could only let out a relieved sigh, but all that I got for my trouble was another pellet cracking against the trunk of the tree that I was in.
I was currently suppressed in my spot, that's for sure. And unless I can move, Hikigaya would just signal the rest of his classmates to move forward and take me out. Which was why I needed a decoy.
I plucked a branch off from the tree that I was in and threw it off to my side, hearing the comforting crack of the BB pellet hitting the branch that I threw as I immediately whirled in the other direction and dashed forward like a mad deer.
Within a second, I was already at his position, driving my rubber knife through the air and feeling...rubber? What the hell – "Sensei."
I immediately whirled around at the statement and drew the gun that I had on my waist, firing a single shot through the air as I felt my balance immediately whip to the side, my body's momentum in my turn being used against me as I whirled in the air, slamming against the ground a second later as I felt pain shoot up at the back of my head.
A single figure came into my vision, but I wasn't given the luxury of firing a shot at him as my arm holding my gun was held in place by his foot. His gun once again fired, the BB pellet slamming against my forehead as I could only sigh and show a resigned smile, my grin being mirrored by his own expression, which seems to be extremely relieved to have shot me on my forehead.
...Seriously. Just because my forehead is big doesn't mean that you have to milk the joke until I'm dead, Hikigaya. Just how bad is your sense of humor, anyway? In any case, not to oneself: be sure to make Hikigaya the 'duck' for the next five games of Duck Hunt. Let's see if he can still survive five games of being chased by everyone all over the place.
Really...Just how petty had I become now?
