Addictions

"Nagi?" Omi called out in the dark room, the soft glow of a computer scream filling the room with the ire blue tint that Omi had always found so welcoming in his room. it seemed that feeling had been robed of him when he walked fully in the room, not bothering to turn the lights on.
"Nagi, I'm sorry. I brought you some dinner." Omi fumbled in the dark to finally set the plate of steaming dinner down on the small table separating his and Nagis beds.
"You shouldn't be sorry." Omi jumped at how close the boy had managed to get to him in the dark, Nagi was sitting on his bed beside him. His blue eyes reflecting the light of the Computer.
"i should be sorry, for letting that happen." Nagis face reflected the wetness of tears In the dark, yet Omi couldn't see his facial expressions.
"You couldn't have stopped it Nagi, it wasn't your fault..."
"It wasn't yours either, Yohjis your friend. I guess it was to be expected that you would stick up for him correct?" Omi nodded, not sure Where Nagi was going with this, but not wanting to interrupt his little partner. Nagi sighed thinking what he said through.
"Schu, when he gets... Stressed, overloaded with thoughts, or Feels like he's cornered and there's no way out. He explodes. Like he did to you Omi, he just explodes. It's been very stressful for him, living with you guys when he's so accustomed to us." Nagi smiled, Omi could tell in the dim light, his smile was comforting.
"Schuldig may seem like he's But he's just an unstable mess. He 's moody insecure and very fragile. He needs a constant balanced, quite, environment, love and a stable position on his way. Schuldig is just as fragile as a little boy." The comparison sounded strange from Nagis lips, Nagi was a kid right? He was a boy. Maybe he didn't consider himself one. But Omi did.
"I didn't know that." Omi said. He didn't, Schuldig had always been so calm and controlling, so cool and collected. It was hard to think the same man who had plotted his cousins death, Needed to feel loved and be comforted and looked after. It was almost impossible. Nagi looked own at his hands and sighed a load off of his shoulders.
"Don't tell him I told you, he'll get angry again, I don't want to put so much stress on the German man. He misses Brad badly and just wants someone to love him. Yohji come naturally as the oldest and his new roommate. I'm not saying it was right for him to do what he did to Yohji, I'm just saying to cut him a break, I can tell when he loses control. He won't remember beating you, or controlling me. Using me," Nagi corrected himself and turned on the lamp with out a movement of his hands. His powers still gave Omi the chills.
"Why are we sitting in that dark?" The tears that had stained his cheeks were dry, leaving red streaks down his pail cheeks. Omi passed him dinner.
"I didn't want to wake you if you were asleep." Omi offered and Nagi nodded. I slight look of shock failing of his face as it was warmed by a smile.
"Thank you." Omi had a feeling Nagi meant more with that muttered thank you then he let onto.

Schuldigs head hurt. It hurt like a bad hang over and drug overdoes age. It hurt like he had been hit by a bus, it hurt like he had dived into deep water and his ears had burst from pressure.
To say none the less he felt like shit. And Schuldig was pretty sure there was only one place he could be. In Yohjis room.
In Yohjis dark room with no light and no water. Schuldig sighed and rolled over to his stomach. His hands and feet were bound. Why? What had he done? Schuldig cursed as he moved, head throbbing.
It was dark in the room, but it could of been any time of the day or night outside. He had lost track of time, memories lost, a gap in time was torn away from his memory.
"Is anyone there? Hello! Help! Someone help me! HELLO!"
"Nagi!" Schuldig sighed, giving up.
Was he drunk again? Why was he like this.
Did he molest Yohji too much?
Or did Farfy just lock him in here and Kill everyone else?
Why would Farfarello not kill him too?
Schuldig laughed. His memory was getting worse and worse every time he turned around.

"I want you to remember, he won't know what happened to you. And not to shout at him, or... Think anything to loudly." Nagi knew Schuldig would feel them approaching, and had made sure Omi knew Schuldig would not be happy, but he would not hurt Omi either. Schuldig was not like that. Not like Brad, as in he just hurt for no reason. Even though you might not think it at first glance, or first impression. Schuldig really didn't like hurting people. It wasn't joy enough for him, Schuldig was more centered around Sex, that was his escape.
Farfs'' was Pain .
Brads was Power.
And Nagi himself...
He didn't think he had one, no wait! Hate, hate was Nagis escaped.
It was failing him right now, But that was it.
"Your not that hateful Nagi-Kun." Schuldigs voice purred to him as her entered the room. Omi was right behind him, banging his clumsy cast on the door and wincing in pain. Nagi could tell Omi was not mad at Schuldig, he felt sorry for him.
Nagi didn't know which one was worse.
"What happened to you kid? Got the crap beat out of you?" Omi didn't quite know how to react to the question. Schuldigs laughter died down as he searched through the young blond boys mind to find the answer. Nagi moved to untie his friend after turning the light on. Schuldig moaned as the light stung his eyes and plopped stomach first onto the bed.
"It was me wasn't it?" Nagi smiled at his older teammate. A pathetic half hearted smile, still a smile.
"Your just stressed out Schuldig, you need to go out and do something besides sitting around here." Nagi untied the harsh rope around his friends wrists. Yohji had insisted he was tied and locked in a room while he was gone with Omi to the hospital.
"That bad eh?" Schuldig mused after Nagi finished untying, feeling his tender wrists and looking over to Omi.

Omi stood there, not really sure how to manage this situation of his.
"I'm sorry." Omi just about gaped at the words out of the Mans face. Inside a million things were running through his brain, a thousand questions and two thousand possible answers.
"Why." Was all he could manage and Schuldig smirked at the shocked look on Omis face.
"I don't know, I can't remember, Remember?" Schuldig scratched his head and sighed at Nagi. Did I do something to you too?" Nagi looked away from Schuldig and Omi saw the hurt look on the younger brunette.
"Yes, yes I did. Damn it all Nagi! Tell me before I get angry again!" Nagi gasped as Schuldig took his face and turned it towards the German so he could look into Schuldigs soul filled eyes.
"You, you made me tell hidden secrets... and..." Nagi choked down tears.
"You were in his head! And using your stupid Mind crap on him! You brought him to tears Schuldig." Schuldig didn't smile smugly like Omi though he would. No Schuldig didn't make a smart remark after that, not like Omi expected.
Schuldig simply put his hand around Nagi, and brought the teen into a embrace.
Nagi held onto Schuldigs Arms.
Omi saw tears resurface onto the boys cheeks.
"I'm so sorry Nagi, I would promise not to ever do it again, but we both know it's not possible for me to keep that promise. So all I can say is I'm sorry little buddy." Nagi sniffed and fell into Schuldigs arms in a childish way, the boy that he never go to be resurfacing.
Schuldig had always been a good friend. When it came down to it, he was.
After all he had done to Nagi, Nagi couldn't remember having a better friend. Farfarello didn't count. He didn't even know who Nagi was sometimes.
"It's not your fault Schuldig." Nagi felt Schuldig pat his head a comforting sensation.
"It never has been. It's this damned situation. It's too much for you, you shouldn't say sorry to me." Nagi reached out and snuggled into his older teammates chest. Butting into his mind, the hardest thing Nagi had to say to Schuldig, he wouldn't say it outloud: 'Say it to Omi'
Schuldig flailed and pushed Nagi off and out of his embrace with a clear, disguised motion. After shaking himself Nagi gracefully got himself together enough to glare at Schuldig for the sudden outburst. Schuldig glowered.
"No!" Nagi stood up with a calm voice and stated his opinion:
"You didn't hurt me as Much as you did him! Look at him Schuldig, you think he will be able to go on missions this month?" Schuldig cursed in his native tongue and held his head. Nagi was think at him, directing waves of phsyc at him. It made his head throb.
"Fuck you Nagi! No way HE'S getting my apologies!" Omi clued into what was happening and shook his head violently.
"I don't want his apologies Nagi! He can keep them!" Omi shouted at Schuldig with a determined sparkle to his eyes. Nagi shook his head furiously, bunching his small hands into fists.
"No!" Nagi stepped forward.
"We work as a team now! We must trust each other! And work together, and that means nothing should go uncounted for, Schuldig, you said your sorrys to me. Now it's his turn." Schuldig looked wildly form Nagi to the door. Hesitating for a moment.
A emotion flashed across his face that could of been hurt, but covered in anger. Then as if making up his mind Schuldig pushed past Nagi and out the door with a string of muffled curses.
Nagi could of stopped him, but Nagi really didn't have the heart, nor guts to. Nagi knew the way Schuldig must feel. Schuldig was so fragile, the slightest upset of power made him in for a downward spiral.
Schuldig would go and pout somewhere until Nagi would come to say his Sorrys.
That was only one problem with Schuldig usually flawless plan.
Nagi wouldn't come this time. He was right. They needed to support each other if they were to survive. It was a fact that Nagi couldn't get into Schuldigs' thick skull.
"Nagi, you didn't have to do that." Omi had taken this all wrong, of course, centering it around himself. Omi thought Nagi was doing this for him. No Nagi wasn't.
Nagi pushed past the older blond and out the doors to go find what Schuldig was seeking at that moment. A quite place to think.

"Check mate! I win!" Farfarello danced around the room with Kens king in hand. Smiling wickedly, yet happily. Ken was still trying to figure out the Irish man, Farfy had been drug free for three days now. Not a complaint in his bones. The Bazerker had indeed been very normal. With the exception of thee rather bad outbreaks Ken had managed to suppress with a simple song Farfarello had taught him. It was an Irish tune that was in English, Ken couldn't understand the words but Farfarello had liked the tune. And was always humming it mindlessly to himself when he was not thinking.
In true. Farfarello was a man of many talents. He was a amazing artist, a great chess player and could speak more languages then Ken had thought existed.
"How do you do that?" Ken looked at the chess board. Farfy had won for the umpteenth time today.
"I can't tell you, then you would win." Farfarello came to sit cross legged in the same stop he had been sitting for three hours of Chess. A insanely happy look to him. At times Farfarello was like a child, other times he was completely mature. His reasoning was flawless. His ability to address situations in life with a simple minds solution was astounding.
Farfarello looked at Ken as he lay back in the chair. His leg was almost healed and his restlessness was beginning to edge at him.
"Play again?" Farfarello wined, rolling over on his back to look up at Ken.
"Farf, when are you going to get board of this game? You've won how many times now?"
"Twenty six." Farfarello lulled his head over the pillow so it was lower then his chest. It looked funny.
"Let's find something else to do." Ken got up with little difficulty out of the red chair in the living room. Farfarello got up with him and looked expectantly at the Athlete.
"We eat now?" he asked heading past Ken and into the kitchen.
"I guess so. Yeah, I'm hungry too." Ken had convinced Farfarello to not were the Collar any more. It creeped Ken out alot. Instead Farfarello wore a silver chain with a cross on it. The cross had been turned Red. With his own blood Ken had assumed.
The leather close with the spikes had to go to, Ken was working on a wardrobe of color for the pail man. Something that didn't make him look so... Deadly. He was now, warring one of Kens Many jerseys and a pair of shorts with track lines down them. It made him look so much younger then his real age.
Hobbling along Ken managed up the stairs, daring to leave Farfarello alone with himself in the Kitchen to go upstairs and check on Omi and Nagi.
The pair of younger boys had taken a almost instant liking to each other. They worked well together and if it wasn't for Schuldig they would of most likely done the mission with ease.
Ken made his way up the stairs with a little effort into the other twos room. With out knocking he entered the small bedroom. Yohji had taken Schuldig out to talk and They had not come back yet.
"Hey! What's going on in here kids?" Omi smiled witch equaled out Nagis slight frown.
"You left Farfarello alone?" Ken knew the response before it was out of the younger Japanese youths mouth. He shrugged and nodded, flopping down on Omis bed.
"Yeah, so? I think he's capable of it." Nagi sighed and returned to the computer screen.
The room was small and lit with the warm glow of the small lamp and the two computer screens.
"You'll regret it."

Farfarello peered into the pantry in search for something to eat. He was quite happy today there had been no hallucinations in a whole day. There had been nothing but a good day with his Ken-ken.
Farfarello poured out some Rice crispys into a bowl and reached for the milk when he felt a slight twitch to his left arm. Something hitting him.
He looked down and there was a Kitchen knife sticking out of his forearm.
'Now how did that get there?' he thought tugging at the knife to free it from the bloody mess of Tissue. He looked at the blood running down his arm and the knife. Frowning.
"I didn't put that there." He said to himself and looked around the room. Someone was here. He dashed away from another incoming knife. Looking wildly around for attackers.
"Show yourselves, come to play with Farfarello? Come on out, Farfarello knows you too well." Farfarello took up a knife and circled the room. He didn't want to call for help. What if this was an illusion? What if ken was disappointed in him because he was battling his imaginary fears again. He would not risk it, even if the wound did seem real. He had no way of telling it was.
Another knife struck his right calf and tore downwards. Farfarello didn't squeak as the steak knife cut his leg mussels. He went down though. His leg giving in. His vision was starting to blur from blood loss.
Farfarello knew it was not real when the blade shimmered above him, it had no wielder yet it was attacking him.
He blinked and a single tear rolled down his eyes.
"I don't want to play today, please go away. I'm not insane any more. I'm cured. You shouldn't be here." Farfarello couldn't find the strength to stay in a sitting position so he laid back down.
"Don't react to them, just don't even recognize they are there, they are not real. They cannot hurt you, ignore them. Close your eyes. It'll all be over soon Farfarello... Hush..." Farfarello Whispered over the things Ken-Ken had told him to do, humming a certain Irish tune to try and reconnect him to the world.
Farfarello closed his eyes, and couldn't find a will to open them again.

"Farf!" Ken Omi and Nagi were standing at the Kitchen doorway.
Blood soaked through onto the carpet of the hallways. Farfarello lay in the middle of the floor soaked with his own blood. His back, legs and shoulders were badly gashed in more then one spot, dribbling a steady flow of crimson over the white floor. Around him were several knives, all bloodied.
"I told you. he is not stable, I don't even see why you try. he has never been in his life, sane. Why would you try now?" Ken rushed past Nagi and slipped on the blood wet floor hitting his head as he fell down.
Ken cursed and Omi came to help him. Steadying Ken they moved over to the white man, even paler now that the blood had been drained out of his body.
"Farfarello?" Ken asked as he placed a hand on his teammates shoulder. Shaking a little. his effort earned him a groan from the delirious Farfarello.
"Go away hallucination. I don't want to play today." Ken smiled as the Irish man came to. his one Amber eye opening and closing with the futile attempt to rise.
"Farfy." Ken touched Farfarellos shoulder and the Irish man burst out in terror, grabbing one of the near knives and Pinning Ken against the wall in a struggle to rid himself of his attacker Farfarello stabbed into the wall. His mouth frothed with his own blood and Saliva, making a pink foam drip down his trembling chin.
"I Will not let you! You lied to me! They have hurt me for too long... I won't let them hurt you... Not..." Ken shivered under the Mad mans grip, lifting one steady hand the athlete Pushed a hand to touch the others cheek. Humming a soft Song to himself. Farfarello let the knife go,
"No, what have I done..." Farfarellos one Golden eye inspected the room, wandering for the course of the blood.
"...To myself?" Farfarello shook furiously as he looked at his own blood stained hands. Coming out of a delusional state he slithered Away from Ken. Mumbling incoherent thoughts.
Ken shivered from the death that had awaited him.
"Nagi..." Omi took the tranquilizer out of the younger boys hands with a soft whisper. A sorrowful look coming over Omis compassionate face.
"Leave the man," Omi watched the Irish man in the puddle of his own blood. Whispering a English tune as he rocked himself back and forth.
Nagi sighed and put down the Gun. Walking over to Farfarello he knelt at the Mans feet and peered into the one clapped shut eye.
"Farfarello," his voice was coolly but kind as Nagi put one hand on his teammates shoulder.
"No drugs!" Farfarello lashed out at Nagi like a a striking viper. He hissed and caught the young boys arms. And, with one fowl swoop, Brought Nagi under his Foot, holding him by his arms.
"No more! I can't take it! Your driving me insane!" Farfarello screamed at the top of his lungs. He looked at Nagis pail hands in his flinging them back at the youth with a desgusted look. Nagi backed away like a scared rabbit.
Farfarello stood triumphant for the moment. Looking to his former partner, Ken.
Farfarello was hit with a pang of shame and guilt.
With a quick simple movement He was on his knees again. His docile mod now engaged. Ken stared wide eyed at the man.
"Ken," Farfarello reached out towards the frightened Athlete.
"Please don't be angry with me. I didn't mean to hurt you. I was just trying to ignore them... But no matter how much I tried they just kept coming. Like jackals in the night. You must light a fire to keep them away." Farfarello Moved like a ape, sliding across the floor till he came to sit just by Ken. Ken offered a dampened smile as he gulped down the lump in his throat.
"Farfy I'm not..." He had to hold out a squeal as the Irish man Wrapped his arms around his midsection and cuddled his head against Kens chest.
"You ARE my fire. You keep them away, don't let them come again Ken. please. Don't let them get me. I tried so hard, I cant... They just keep coming for me. Out of nowhere." Farfarello closed his eyes in the comfort of his Ken. His sanctuary. The voices stopped, almost instantly. Quiet sanity.
"Im's so tiered of beign this way."
"Only you can stop them, not Nagi, not Brad, not Schuldig, Not sleep, Not hurt." Farfarello shook his head.
"No... Hurt is gone, Nagi is fake, Schuldig is a drug and Bradly don't give a damn." Ken looked hopelessly lost, his cheek burned with the blush that crept into his face. Omi smiled and Nagi smirked a the scene.
Ken didn't want this contact, he didn't want to be THIS important to Farfarello. He wanted to help the other man, yes. But not be his savior. it seems the athlete had gotten himself into more them he could handle.
"Farfarello..." Farfy put a finger on Kens Lips and gave Ken a stair so intense it could of quieted the most deafening of crowds.
"Sush," Ken sighed and Farfarello snuggled into him.
It was gonna be a long time.
May it be years or weeks.
He was sure this time would drag on for an eternity.

"So..." Schuldig and Yohji were still in the car. Schuldig had not been included in the meeting they had secretly been summoned to.
Missing all that information was a bother to him, and so he was prodding the drivers Brain for answers. Which extremely disturbed/ annoyed Yohji.
"They said your behavior would cost us free time for this week." Yohji let Schuldig have what he was looking for. And the carrot top sighed.
"Us?" The German snuck a smoke from Yohjis Jacket Pocket and Lit it.
"Yes, us, me." Yohji pointed to himself,
"And You." Yohji flicked Schuldigs nose. Then resumed driving and glowered ahead onto the road. He was not happy when he had learnt of that. He wanted to drink, and drink heavy to forget this. Just for one night.
"So, let's pick up some liquor on our way back." Yohji scowled at Schuldig.
"I hate that you can read my thoughts." Schuldig shrugged.
"Well, sometimes, I hate it too." Yohji frowned.
"What is that 'post to mean?" Schuldig sighed once again
"Well, you wanna drink, I wanna drink. So, let's drink. There was no rules to say we can't."
"What if you hurt someone? You are quite violent I see, when you want to be." Schuldig shrugged once again, taking a long drag on Yohjis cigarette.
"We'll do it when they go our for free time then." Schuldig Slung an Arm over Yohjis Shoulders and Stuck the Cigarette In Yohjis Parted lips. Sinking a kiss on his right cheek.
"Come on Yohji," Yohji wiped the kiss off of his cheek with an annoyed glance.
"Please." Schuldig wined and flipped his head over As Yohji pulled off the street and put the car in park. Schuldig lay his head in Yohjis lap and looked up at the older blond. Yohji smirked down at the man.
"You know how stupid you look right?" Schuldig tucked one arm behind Yohjis back as the other tickled down Yohjis chest.
"I thought I looked quite seductive." He stated and Yohji shoved The German off of his lap as he got out of the car.
"Hey!" Schuldig cursed as he scrambled to an upright position in order to get out of the car to follow Yohji into the liquor store.