Lullaby of the lost and gone chapter 11

Authors note: last chapter today guys! Hope you like it^^ moving on to Christmas requests now- can't wait for them! Ooh so if you have got any requests and would a like a oneshot story as a gift this Christmas just ask! ^^ okay that's strangely all I can think to say here hehe oh well I really hope you enjoyed the story merry december XD oh and please review^^

I've learnt a lot over the past few weeks. Like how the world has changed a great deal more than I expected.

Buildings could be so big now- and so strange. Fire was no longer needed to provide light and heat- and, using this magical thing called electricity (which my brother explained to me is kind of like lightning) all kinds of incredible things can be brought to life. It's used for these things called machines, which the world is full of, and they can do almost anything. There's one that cleans clothes for you, so you don't have to, but there's not one for tidying up. Some of them make incredible moving picture, and some can make sounds and music from thin air. Another thing that seems pretty common nowadays are cars- I don't like them much, because no one can ever explain how they work (except North, but his explanation just confused me).

The modern world is a strange, and sometimes scary, new place. But I never got too afraid. Not with my brother beside me. He showed me all he magical sights, the natural and the man made- buildings taller than mountains, majestic, frozen glaciers that shone in the sunlight. Even giant, metal birds that were like the cars of the air (but it's hard to be scared of them, when all I think when I see them is how Jack pulls faces at the unknowing passengers- and taunts the metal shell as he flies ahead, like he expects it to get annoyed).

It really was- and still is- a lot to take in. But, at the same time... it really is incredible.

North was a great help- he helped me get used to the machines by making some small ones himself. He showed me all kinds of beautiful, magical little machines and toys- and not once did they ever unsettle me. Even if it was a machine- if North made it, it just never seemed scary. I could only ever see the wonder in the things North made.

Bunny was also really kind. Whenever the new world got too big, stressful or overwhelming- but I didn't want to return to my forest- he'd let me into his warren. Which, although it was filled with strange and unusual plant life, it always seemed far much more real than the strange land above ground. But, he'd only let me in if Jack wasn't there. He doesn't trust my brother not to try and do anything stupid, to annoy him, while his back is turned- and I don't blame him. He is a really harsh trouble maker, my brother- to Bunny especially. I'll admit, though, I did help him out, occasionally. We even managed to get Sandy to join in sometimes. He'd knock out either Bunny or North, leaving us free to cause mayhem while they were asleep- but he always claimed to know nothing about it afterwards.

Sandy's a great friend. He might not talk much, but he's a really good listener. It was him I talked to whenever I didn't want to worry Jack with my problems. Plus, like Jack promised, he was always free to have a little bit of fun no matter what he was doing. He'd make all kinds of sand animals for us to have fun with- and Jack came up with all kinds of games to play together. We had a competitive rodeo once (which, apparently, is when people try to stay onto a bucking animal for the longest time possible). We raced each other atop various sand creatures around cities with lots and lots of really tall building (my brother often cheated at them- using his personal ice wolf to slide ahead, or throw off the other racers). Or sometimes we'd just play a simple tag together.

Sometimes, as we were playing, we'd bump into Tooth as she went on her rounds, and she'd join too- she rarely had time to stay for more than one or two games, but she was great fun. The games were always a lot better when she played.

I'd never had a sister before, but I imagine me and Tooth came pretty close to what it was like. We'd often just wander about the palace and spend a bit of time talking about girl stuff- she loved hearing about the stories of mine and Jack's youth (Jack would probably be mortified if he knew some of the things I'd said to her, but she's promised not to tell anyone), and I enjoy hearing about the different memories she'd sometimes peek at while tooth collecting. We got along great: "us girls have to stick together, right" she said once, as she told me about how nice it was not to be he only girl anymore.

Finally, the last person I haven't talked about yet... Jack. He hasn't changed in the slightest- he is still just as crazy, mad and playful as ever. Always trying to bring a smile to my face- and forever causing more trouble than he could ever make up for. He actually prided himself on making his way back to the top of the naughty list in two years flat (apparently he got cleared of all charges when he became a Guardian). Honestly, I wasn't even mildly surprised when he told me that- he thinks the day's been a complete waste if he hasn't managed to pull at least ten pranks.

So, yeah... a lot has happened in these last few weeks. Is that all it's been? It feels like its been so much longer- it feels as though its been years. It's like I've always known he Guardians- and Jack, it's like he was never gone. I'm glad it feels that way- it helps me forget what had happened... although, I still sometimes look back on it. It was a bad thing I did... Which is why I now try to atone for it.

I no longer steal children to share in my grief, but guide them back to their homes when they are lost. I decided I wanted to be as good a guiding light as my brother was- and help those who were lost, just like he'd done for me. I do it in the same way I've always done: I sing them home. They still don't hear the song, of course, but it saves them- which is what really matters... Sometimes, though... I really wish they could hear it.

That they could see me, and thank me for returning them home- I just wanted to hear a simple "thank you" and see a smile directed at me. I wanted to be able to hold their hand and talk to and reassure them, as I lead them back to their families. I really wish I could be seen...

My brother says its because they don't believe in me, but not to worry because he he's got a plan for that. I hope it works, because it gets a little lonesome in the trees when everyone's busy, or in those rare times I find myself alone- like when I'm hanging out with one of them and they have to leave to continue work... I watch the kids laughing and playing together in the street, looking like they're having so much fun, and I long to join in... but they only walk through me when I try.

It's okay, though. Because my brother says he has a plan.. and I believe in him. I always will...

Are you listening, moon? Can you even hear my thoughts, I wonder? I know it was you who woke me up- just like it was you who saved my brother.

So, even if you can't hear me, although I really hope can... I want to say thank you. Thank you... for saving my brother... and for saving me as well.

Jack squeezes my hand, bringing me out from my wandering thought as I look up to see him smiling cheerfully down at me. I smile back. Right now, we're on our way to a house where two children live. He hasn't entirely explained what we're going to do there, but I knew why and who we're going to see. He told me, a long time ago, that I'd been asleep for around three hundred years... which meant that my mother, and all the friends and families I knew, were dead. I had grieved them for a while, but with my brother and the Guardians to help me through it, I didn't stay sad long.

That was a while ago, now. I was over it. But recently he told me that our mother had another child- after me and Jack- who'd gone on to keep our bloodline alive over the centuries... and these two children that we were going to meet were our descendants. They wouldn't be able to me, of course, but all the same... I wanted to see what they were like.

It was dark out, but Jack reassured me that that was okay- this was the best way to make sure they got out without their mother stopping them- and they really didn't mind at all. He bounced a light, white snowball in his hand, as we stopped and looked up at one of the houses. The window I could see him aiming for was at an awkward angle and it had a slope of roof obscuring it a bit, but I had no doubt he'd hit it. He always did.

Surely enough, a few seconds later, it hit the glass with a soft thump... and not long after, we saw movement at the window. He must get woken up like this a lot, I thought, because he got up really quickly. When he saw who was waiting for him, he grinned, excitably, and waved, before disappearing into house.

I was stunned stiff. It was him. The first boy that I took to my forest. The brave, little boy who had feared only for his sister, not for himself... he was her descendant. Well- Jack's descendant, really, I thought. They way he fretted over his sister like that... I should've known. He was definitely a lot like my brother. I knew he couldn't see me, to point an accusatory finger of blame at me, but I felt the guilt all the same. I felt so ashamed of what I'd done- and to my own family, no less.

The sound of a closing door and thumping footsteps jolted me out of my self berating, and I saw the brunette come running up to us.
"Hey Jack!" He called, quietly so as not to wake his mum up. "You trying to get me in trouble again?" He joked.
"Course not. Don't want you to rivalling my naughty list champion status, now, do I?" He smirked back, and I can't help but roll my eyes. Being the naughtiest kid in the world wasn't an achievement to be proud of (but, he seemed to think it was).

Then, quite unexpectedly, he went quiet. Then he glanced at me almost imperceptibly. Jamie frowned- Jack did not normally go quiet like that. He was up to something- we both knew that, but we had no idea what. He beckoned Jamie forwards, and leaned down to whisper in his ear. What was he doing? I wondered. Knowing him, he could be doing anything.

I almost went to listen in on them, but I held back my curiosity- that would be rude. Still, his eyes were glinting at me in a strange kind of way. Even though he was whispering in Jamie's ear, he was looking directly at me. Okay, now I really wanted to know what he was telling him.

I almost asked, when I heard Jamie start talking. He wasn't whispering, but he wasn't speaking very loudly (since Jack was), though it was loud enough for me to hear.
"Yeah, I remember." He said, looking as confused as I felt. Jack whispered something else to him, and his eyes widened.
"She's a spirit too!" He yelled in astonishment. Jamie's jaw dropped open, slightly, as he turned, looking everywhere, as though searching for something. Then, I knew exactly what Jack was trying to do.

He was trying to get him to see me. But would it work? Could he really do that? And wasn't that breaking some sort of really big rule? I thought. But, I knew he didn't care about the rules (he often said rules only existed for him to break them).
"Is she?..." Jamie trailed off, turning back to Jack excitably. He didn't finish, but he didn't need to. The question was obvious. Jack's eyes glinted, as he grinned... and he looked over to me.

Jamie followed his gaze, and I held my breath... But, after a moment, Jamie only frowned- but even before he did, I knew he couldn't see me. His eyes were darting about in my general direction, rather than focussing on me. I lowered my eyes... it hadn't worked... But, at least he'd tried, right. I could be grateful for that.

"I can't see her." He whispered, leaning sidewards, to confirm to Jack what we already knew. But it looked like my brother just wouldn't give up. He whispered something else back, speaking for much longer this time... and Jamie nodded as he spoke, his eyes slowly growing wider, and wider... But that wasn't the only thing I noticed about his eyes. They were looking straight at me... Not through, past or around me... At me.

His eyes met my own- both wide and round, with wonder and disbelief. Slowly, we grinned at each other... and then Jamie broke off excitably.
"Jack! This is your-?!" He exclaimed, looking back and forth between us, like his mind was blown. He was buzzing with energy, doing one of those 'OMG' faces (my brother was teaching me bits of modern language like that).

Then, without warning, he turned dashed back towards the house.
"I gotta get Sophie. She has to see this." He yelled, as he ran to the front door. He almost crashed straight into it, but managed, somehow, to slow himself at the last second. Then, he opened it and dashed in- somewhat carefully, in an attempt not to wake up his mum. Luckily, it was really late and she was on the other side of the house, asleep, so she didn't hear any of the excitement.

I turned to my brother, amazed.
"... He saw me." I whispered, shocked. He grinned back. I giggled out of sheer joy. Someone-. He actually saw me! I never realised how desperate I was for someone, other than the Guardians, to see me, until that little boy actually did it. I ran to my brother. "You got him to see me!" I exclaimed, laughing, as I jumped him. Forcing him to catch me, as I leapt and clung to him as tight as I could- trying to convey all of my gratitude in that one, big hug.

"Jack's got a girlfriend?!" I heard the little girl's loud, incredulous voice behind me, and we both turned to see Sophie gawping at us. We looked at each other, and just couldn't help bursting into laughter, while Jamie clarified.
"Sophie." He chuckled. "That's his sister- I just told you." He said.
"I was half asleep." She complained. "I only heard the bit about the forest woman." She defended herself, pouting a little. So that was what Jack had whispered to him, I thought. Jamie believed he had a sister, who was a spirit, but, until he actually believed in the legends of the forest maiden, he couldn't actually see me.

Jack let go of me, and I dropped down to the floor.
"Now, come on." He said. "I didn't get you two up, just to introduce you to Emma." He told us. We all turned confused to him at that. He didn't? Well, what else did he plan to do, then? I thought.
"We're going ice skating." He announced.

I froze, as Jamie and Sophie cheered.
"Last one to the lake's a rotten egg!" Jamie yelled, running as he shouted, to take an early lead.
"Hey- no fair!" Sophie shouted after him, as she tried to catch up. "I didn't know we having a race!" She protested.

Jack stood still, watching them run for a moment... then he turned back to me. His smile was soft now- reassuring- as I turned those words over, and over, inside my head. 'Ice skating', 'going ice skating'... I took a deep breath. Why would he say that? Why would he want me to...?

Seeing the uncertainty and worry on my face, he stepped closer.
"Why would you choose skating?" I muttered, nervous, the events of that day replaying in my head. I knew, now that he had control of the ice, there was no chance of that happening again... But, I couldn't destroy the memory of the day...
"Because, I think you need to finally let go of the past. Make an official new start... and I think this well finally put things to rest." He explained. I thought for a long time, then. My head bowed low... For a boy claiming to have never grown up over three hundred years, that did sound pretty wise.

Would stepping onto the ice again finally put the ghosts to rest? Could I ever truly make peace with that day? I thought about the terror of stepping onto the ice again... The déjà vu... The horror of remembering what had happened the last time I put on skates... The cracks and snapping that caused me to freeze in place... Feeling for sure I was going to die... My heart leaping into my throat, as Jack fell down instead... and waiting, with a tear streaked face, and broken heart, as he never returned to the surface...

Yes. I thought, determinedly. Yes, it would mean a new start.

It would mark the close of the chapter with the girl terrified of the ice... and the beginning of a new page- blank, and ready to be filled with laughter, joy and adventures. That day of heartbreak was over, now. It was in the past. Just like the dark 'M', who kidnapped children and took them to a tree filled nightmare- that was just a figure of the past now. No more than that. He was right- this was going to be a new start for me. A time to finally make peace with the day, for which I blamed myself, and turn my back on it forever- looking forwards, to a bright, and promising, future.

I lifted my head up. No longer afraid. Finally free. Finally relinquished from the shadows of the past. And then I did something that even my brother could've never seen coming. I pushed him over, and ran off, cackling. I pushed him over. Me! In all the weeks we've been back together, I never attempted to pull a prank on my brother. I think I may have been just as surprised as he was! Then, looking back as I ran, I saw his face, and laughed. No- he was definitely more surprised. He could not've looked more stunned. But it wasn't long before he got over it, and rose to my challenge as he reached for his staff, which lay nearby. I had no doubt that he definitely would not want to be the rotten egg.

He smirked, victoriously, as he leapt into the wind. But he'd forgotten I had tricks of my own- and no way was I letting myself become the rotten egg either.

I dashed into the nearest tree, and vanished into my forest realm for a brief moment, before returning back to the real world- this time, beside the lake. I grinned as I saw the others hadn't made it yet, so I settled down by the lakeside to wait. It was spring/summer time, and the lake was almost completely still, like a mirror- except for the slight wind that stirred its surface with soft, rolling waves.

I sat and watching the moon shine down, casting a luminous glow down from the deep, infinitely blue, night sky, speckled with numberless stars. The round circle of light reflecting and shimmering on slight ripples that caused it to dance across the surface of the water. The ripples spreading out from where I swung my toes, back and forth within the water. It seems that was one was one thing me and my brother had shared, without even knowing it- we always stayed barefoot. Me, because I liked the feel of grass under my feet (him, perhaps because he liked the crunch of snow beneath them?).

I carried on flicking the water across the lake, and soon the tune just came to me. Just like it always did. I found myself humming, in the quiet of night. Nothing to disturb the melody- just beautiful silence, that carried the sound, making it sound purer. Like the very essence of music, shining through the peaceful darkness like the moonlight.

When the tune finally ended, I picked up the song. Letting the words flow, across the air, like the ripples across the water. I sang that song. The one that had once been a lament for my grief- stirring a deep sadness within me, as I thought about he lost and gone. But now, the idea of it ever meaning that just didn't seem possible anymore. It was our song. My brother and I's... And I would sing it forever, with a smile in my heart.

"When you feel like you are lost,
and there's nowhere to go.
When the shadows are growing,
and you're feeling low.
Look deep in your heart,
And you'll find I am there.
So reach, take my hand now,
For there is so much to share.

Come with me now,
to a place of light and dreams.
We'll play and run together,
and swim within the streams.
Through the joys, and through the sorrows,
I will always be there.
I will be right by your side,
to love and to care.

Sleep now, softly.
For the sun has come to go.
The endless folds of darkness,
arrive now, soft and slow.
Do not fear the shadows,
for they cannot touch the light.
And if you feel low, then remember,

how I held you so tight."

It wasn't a lullaby for the gone and lost... it was a song of love, and joy.