Author's Note:

Just a cute Johnlock and family time in this chapter!


The kissing had been perfect until Sherlock seemed to falter. Right away John pulled back, panting for breath as he studied his husband curiously. Something had happened but it had only been in his husband's head. "Are you all right?" His eyes were narrowed slightly, one hand raised up to run through Sherlock's hair. Most of this vacation was going to be spent trying to keep his husband out of his own mind.

Damn it. Of course John would notice. How could he possibly tell his husband what he had been thinking? Sherlock nodded slowly. "I was just thinking sorry." True enough. "Can we not talk about it please?" He sighed and rested his head on Johns shoulder. Well he had certainly managed to ruin the moment.

John just wrapped his arms around his husband, smiling softly and pressing a kiss against the man's temple. "I wish I could help get you out of that mind of yours," he said softly, one hand rubbing up and down Sherlock's back. While he considered himself a good husband, it was difficult to feel like he was doing well when his husband was like this. "We have all vacation, yeah?"

"I don't deserve you," Sherlock muttered but it was more to himself than John. "I'm sorry." He wasn't sure if he was apologizing for his errant thoughts or for how he was acting now. He sighed again and leaned heavily into his husband for support and comfort. Apart of him wanted to tell John but it probably wouldn't end well if he did so he decided not to say anything further.

Hearing words like that made John frown right away and all he could do was hold Sherlock closer, letting his eyes slip shut as he tried to keep himself calm as well as his husband. "Don't you say that at all," he murmured softly, placing a soft kiss on the man's temple. "I deserve you and I don't think I have ever met anybody who deserves me more than you. It has always been you."

Sherlock gave a slight nod. "Can we go back to the bed and snuggle?" He finally lifted his head and looked up at John. He just wanted to hold onto his husband for a little while. Watch John sleep. Forget all his stupid thoughts, to just stay out of his head for a minute. He didn't move to get up though, enjoying his husband's body close to his.

A small smile tugged at his lips and John nodded, slowly standing up and easily bringing Sherlock with him, balancing the man on his feet with ease. "Of course. I will take you there, snuggle with you just a bit," he murmured as he opened the door and shut the light off right away. The hotel room was pitch black now and he needed to get some briefs on before either of the kids woke up. Once he managed to get a pair on he climbed into bed, opening his arms up for Sherlock without a thought.

Sherlock followed after John, holding his husband's hand. He navigated the darkness rather easily, having done several experiments in pitch black. He grabbed a pair of John's boxers and put them on, wanting to feel the comfort that was merely sentimental. He climbed into the bed and snuggled up with his husband immediately. "I love you," he whispered as he pressed his lips against John's back gently in a kiss.

Relaxing in their bed was far better on his body than the floor of the shower and right away John sank into the soft mattress, letting out a soft sigh at his husband's words. "I love you, too," he replied, pulling Sherlock as close as he could manage. With kids they hardly had time to lay around like this and vacation was exactly what he needed to feel close to his husband again. "I love you so much."

Sherlock smiled even though his head was buried in the center of John's back. He draped an arm over his husbands side and then tangled their legs together. His free hand sought out Johns and when he found it he intertwined their fingers with a gentle squeeze. He continued the light kisses along his husband's skin.

There was nothing better than having Sherlock laying behind him like this, simply holding him and paying attention to him. It was a drastic change from their lives in London for the past few months. With their limbs all tangled together he could do nothing more than smile. "How did I get so lucky to get you in my life?"

"You are only lucky because I am so perfect and amazing." Sherlock smirked but continued the small kisses. There. Feeling better already. Of course, John could always do that for him. It was one of the many reasons the man he was curled up against was his husband. "I love you," he repeated.

This night couldn't get any better for the two of them, could it? Despite the fact that their children were fast asleep in the bed next to them and their plan of making love hadn't gone like they had planned, John couldn't deny that he felt happier with their relationship now than he had for the past six months. "I love you, too," he replied again, letting himself lean happily against his husband as one hand dropped to rest on top of Sherlock's, pushing both of them gently against his stomach that wasn't as flat anymore.

Sherlock sighed contently, eyes closing as his body completely relaxed into John. "I like how this vacation is starting for us." Hopefully it would only get better from here. He hadn't planned on sleeping tonight since he had napped on the plane but everything was so perfect right now, he just might anyway.

It definitely looked like John had managed to make his husband relaxed enough to, hopefully, fall asleep. "It has been very nice, hasn't it?" At some point he would want to have sex again and see if they could last a little longer, not to mention they'd get to spend a lot of time with the children. Amy had constantly been asking about her Papa and it hurt John to tell her for the past six months that he was working. "It's going to be perfect."

"Perfect," Sherlock murmured against John's back. And it was. The vacation was going far better than he had anticipated or expected. He hoped it would continue that way. It was hard not to worry about things that could possibly go wrong, given all the horrible things that had happened to him and John. No. Stop. Don't think about that right now. Don't ruin the moment again. He snuggled closer to his husband still, and resumed his small kisses in hopes of distracting his mind.

All of those kisses were perfect and John just relaxed, sighing as his body relaxed into the mattress. "I can feel you thinking," he whispered with a soft smile as he turned his head a bit and looked at Sherlock the best he could manage. "We are all just fine, yeah? Safe and sleeping. Nothing is going to happen to us. I promise. And tomorrow will be fantastic."

Sherlock smirked and continued the kisses. He was able to relax against John again, finding comfort in being close to his husband's body. The kisses gradually slowed and then stopped when he finally fell asleep. He hadn't meant to, but everything had been soothing it was hard not to.

When the kisses stopped John couldn't help but smile softly, letting his own eyes slip shut as Sherlock's rhythmic breathing soon lulled him to sleep as well. For the first time in months his dreams were calm and peaceful, not based on the worries of his family or the horrors of the past. It wasn't until he felt a small hand gently pushing at his chest that he woke up, glancing at the clock and sighing softly when he saw it was only three in the morning.

"Dada, I hads a scary dream," Amy whispered, clearly trying to keep herself quiet. Even she knew that Papa needed his sleep. "Can I sleeps with you?" The moment she saw John nod she curled into his chest, thumb instantly in her mouth as she fell asleep almost instantly. Now all John had to worry about was making sure that Thomas didn't feel left out when morning rolled around.

Sherlock had heard the voices, even though hushed. He didn't to move and tried not to change his breathing pattern so John wouldn't notice. It was best to just stay put until the family was awake for the morning. He began thinking about the different places there were to visit in New York City and needless to say there was pretty much an endless list of things they could see and do.

It hadn't taken John long at all to fall right back asleep, a small smile on his face showing how completely happy he was. Sherlock was with him, he wasn't sleeping in an empty bed. Before long, though, the sun was peaking up from the window of their hotel room and Amy was squirming against him. He could feel that Sherlock was just a bit more tense than he had been and that meant he was awake. "Good morning," he whispered as he turned his head to get the best look he could manage of his husband.

"Morning Love," Sherlock uttered quietly. He smiled at John and maneuvered so he could give his husband a quick kiss on the lips. He slumped back against John, feeling rather comfortable in that position. It didn't sound like the children were up and he wouldn't mind spending a few more moments curled against his husband.

The kiss made John smile and he let his head drop back down to look at the little curl still curled against his chest. So far she seemed to be sleeping peacefully and that was quite a relief. "Is Thomas awake?" He turned his head again and studied his husband as a small sound came from Amy before her face was pressed tighter against his skin.

Sherlock kept his body snuggled against John's but lifted his head so he could look over at their son. He furrowed his brows as he saw their son missing from the bed. The shower running made him relax, as he dropped his head back down on the pillow. "I think the answer is 'yes' Love." He smirked into his husband's back, not wanting to get up still.

Now John would feel like he would need to make it up to Thomas the entire time for waking up with Amy in their bed. They had always had a problem with the boy feeling left out of their family and he hated it. "That's good," he murmured softly as he dropped a hand to tangle it up with his husband's. Sherlock's body resting behind him was wonderfully comforting and as Amy easily fell back asleep he moved closer to the man. "Did you sleep at all?"

"A little," Sherlock admitted. "I napped a long time on the plane so I didn't need a full night's rest." Sherlock decided to give John some more small kisses while he still had the time to do so. "What do you think we should do first today? Statue of Liberty? Times Square? Ride the tube? Ellis Island? Coney Island?" There was certainly more to see than just those places but he figured those were the most popular.

They had a lot of options but right away he knew what their son might enjoy. "Ellis Island," John replied softly as he looked down at Amy with a smile. "Thomas will love every second of that, you know how he loves learning new things. We could go to the Statue of Liberty after that, they are rather close." The next day could be spent spoiling their daughter but today he wanted to see their son smile and be happy. "What do you think?"

"Sounds good to me." It didn't really matter to him either way. He had never been a tourist before so even though he had been to New York City before, he had would be experiencing a lot of it for the first time with the rest of his family. The shower was off. He supposed he should get up but he still didn't move away from John.

Thomas came out of the bathroom after dried off and dressed. "Morning!" He grinned at his parents, obviously excited about all the things they would do today in this big, strange city. He had written in his journal before anyone was awake earlier, and for the first time the entry hadn't made him want to cry. Maybe writing down good things was okay too. He had thought about talking to his Dad about it but he was worried it would make him look stupid.

And there was Thomas, already with so much energy and far happier than John had remembered seeing him in months. "Good morning, Thomas," he replied with a smile as he watched Amy squirm and finally sit up, her blonde hair sticking in all directions as she rubbed at her eyes and yawned. "I see you are very ready to go for today. We're going to Ellis Island, do you know where that is?" Hopefully their son would find it as exciting as he thought.

Amy grunted and slid off of the bed, stuffed teddy bear hanging from one hand as she made her way to her suitcase and started getting clothes out. "Papa," she murmured sleepily. "Can yous helps me take a bath, please?" Before even moving toward the bathroom she waited for an answer, clearly not wanting to exert any more energy than necessary.

Even though Sherlock had been awake awhile, he wanted to grumble at how perky Thomas was already. He didn't though. He was supposed to be a better father to the boy. Nothing like his Old Man. It was something he worried about constantly that sometimes he found it terrifying. He sighed at his thoughts forcing himself to get out of head before he got lost and the children noticed. He uncurled himself from John finally and moved over to little Sandi. "Come on Baby Girl, let's get you all clean and ready for the day." He scooped her up easily and moved to the bathroom.

Thomas knew that look in his Daddy's eyes and his grin faltered. Had he said something wrong? He matched Sherlock's sigh without even realizing it. He glanced to his Dad, the grin returning a bit. "Uh-huh! We learned about in primary school this year. It is where all the people came to...integrate...no...immigrate?" He be it his lip nervously, unsure of his word choice.

John sat up and pushed himself back to relax against the headboard, smiling happily down at Thomas. "C'mon, get up here," he said softly, patting the now open mattress next to him. "We are going to learn all about immigration today, Thomas, and it's going to be very cool. I picked it just for you because I hoped you would really like it." There was a long pause before he smiled again, studying their son curiously. "You were up very early this morning, is everything all right?"

Amy squealed as Sherlock picked her up, clearly a bit more awake now that she was in her Papa's arms. "Bath time!" She giggled as she was set down and the water was started, letting the warmth relax her as she took it all in. "So we is gonna learn about things today? I doesn't wanna learn, I wants to just run around and see stuffs, Papa."

Sherlock grinned at little Sandi. Their daughter was capable of putting a smile on his face at any given moment. Once the water came up to her waist he turned the water off. "We are going to do both, okay? That way we do some things Thomas wants to do and stuff you want to do. It is called a compromise. In fact, you are learning right now Baby Girl. What are you going to do about that?" He smirked at Amy and began to gently shampoo her head, making sure to use the children's.

Thomas climbed up onto the bed and was quiet for a long time, a contemplative look on his face. He glanced over to the bathroom to make sure Daddy and Amy were still in there. He looked back over to his Dad. "I'm used to being up early and I am still getting used to the time difference." He had been awake since his sister had left the bed after her nightmare. He shrugged a bit and fell quiet again, biting his lip nervously for several minutes before finally speaking again. "Do...do you think it is okay for a guy to keep a diary? Well, not a diary...a journal." He looked up at his Dad with wide eyes, still gnawing on his lip.

John looked down at Thomas and smiled just a bit, wrapping an arm gently around the boy's shoulders and pulling him close. "It's actually completely all right," he said softly, dropping his head to place a soft kiss on top of the boy's head. "For a lot of people it helps them get through some tough points in their lives, y'know?" After a long pause he dropped his head to help their son's gaze. "I keep a journal," he finally whispered. "And so does your Daddy."

"Compromise?" The word felt weird on Amy's tongue and she scrunched her face after saying it, looking up at him as she felt Sherlock's fingers in her hair. "Well I really does love 'Mas so's I guess we can go and does that a'cause he's really good." She looked down at her feet as she wiggled her toes under the water. "He tries lots to be like you, Papa."

Sherlock was agonizingly aware that Thomas constantly sought to be just like him. He supposed someone with his ego would like that but it made him...nervous, because really if anyone was to be idolized it was John. His husband was certainly a much better role model for children than was. Damn it. Stop thinking so much. He smiled down at little Sandi, pleased she said the word without a problem. His eyes beamed with pride. "Very good Baby Girl."

Thomas looked up at his Dad with a mixture of incredulous and wonder. "R-really? Daddy...?" The thought floored him. "So...it isn't girly or sissy?" He rubbed the back of his head. "How come other people say things like? I just wish people at school would like me..." He trailed off with a sigh. He hadn't meant to say that last part, it had just come out and there was no going back. He sighed again and dropped his head.

As soon as the real reason for Thomas' agony was revealed John could do nothing more than look down at him and attempt to control his emotions. "Because some people are inconsiderate and don't realize what everybody else around them might be going through," he said softly, pulling their son closer without a thought. "And I promise that when you get older it will get so much better and people will respect you so much more. Nothing about writing down your feelings is girly or sissy, I promise."

Amy peered up at Sherlock with slightly narrowed eyes, clearly noticing as Sherlock avoided her last topic. For a three year old, nearly four year old, she was quite astute and it was typically very difficult to get things past her. She took after Sherlock in that area. "You gets sad when you hears that 'Mas wants to be like you," she said softly. "You shouldn't a'cause you's is both very good and if he is like you then there is nothing wrong."

Sherlock couldn't help the twitch of a smile that touched the corner of his lips. Little Sandi was still so young but turning out to be a lot like him, at least in the observing department anyway. "Papa just doesn't want Thomas to make all the mistakes he did Baby Girl." True enough he supposed. The conversation would probably seem odd to a third party, considering it was rather adult conversatin to be having with a little girl. It didn't seem strange to him at all. In fact it was one of the many things he loved and found amazing about their daughter.

Thomas leaned into his Dad instantly. "What about people like that mean lady from the island? There was all that attention on the news about you and Daddy." He chewed on his bottom lip some more. "I started writing in my journal because Grandma died and...I didn't want to bother anyone." He took a deep breath and buried his face into John's chest. "Dad, I miss her."

Right away John decided to avoid anything that had to do with that bloody island and instead wrapped both of his arms around Thomas to hold him class. "I miss her, too, Thomas," he whispered as he closed his eyes and gently started rocking back and forth to try and keep their son calm. "And you know what? Whenever I am at home and you want to come and talk to me or even try, you can. I'm your Dad, Thomas, and that's what I'm supposed to do." It was breaking his heart to hear Thomas say everything but this was definitely time they needed.

Amy nodded her head and then let a shrug move her entire body. "Well then just helps him a'cause he can be likes you but if you tells him what not to do then he'll will be you but without the mistakes." To her that seemed like the best option, clearly, so she settled for gently splashing in the water and laughing as it splashed up on her body. She had managed to switch from serious to three year old in a matter of seconds.

Sherlock smiled as he watched little Sandi in silence as he continued to bathe her. After awhile he broke into a grin and finally said something. "You keep splashing like that and you will get water everywhere silly Baby Girl." The grin got bigger as he splashed the water with her gently.

"I started my journal so I wouldn't cry so much. I know you said it is okay, but I don't like crying Dad. It makes me feel like shit inside." Thomas grimaced at his word choice there and bit down on his lip hard, even though it was too late now. It was the first time he had ever swore before and he knew he wasn't supposed to because he wasn't an adult but it had just slipped out.

Right. There was definitely something wrong that Thomas had managed to hide from both of them. John looked down at the boy and took a deep breath. "Is it helping?" That was the main question, wasn't it? If the writing really did help Thomas than there was no point in stopping. "And I know that crying might make you feel horrible but trust me, my little boy, that when you are done you will feel better because you aren't holding it all in."

Amy looked down at her Papa's massive hand and right away starting splashing back. This wasn't their bathroom back home so she felt far more comfortable making a mess, that much was obvious. "Papa!" She started laughing, even kicking her feet a bit to send water up against the tiled wall.

Sherlock laughed as well, and continued to slash the water with little Sandi. They were going to make quite the mess. He would have to clean it up. Sure they were in a hotel and cleaning services were provided but that was just bad manners. His mother would throw a fit if she knew her youngest son would do such a thing. He could hear her yelling at him in his and it actually made him smile.

So he wasn't in trouble for swearing? Thomas breathed out a sigh of relief and his now raw lip finally got some reprieve. "Yeah. I like writing. I think...I might like it better than singing with Uncle Gregory...but don't tell him. I still want to sing with him. Journals are private right? You and Daddy aren't going to read it?" He finally lifted his head from his Dad's chest and looked up at John's face.

"Oh, of course not," John said softly, shaking his head with a small smile. "I would never read your private journal, Thomas. I will only talk to you about things that you bring up and if you have any problems you do know that I am here for you." He dropped his head and placed a gentle kiss on the boy's forehead. "I promise that we will never ever read your journal and we will even make sure that Amy doesn't, either."

More splashing and all Amy could do was turn in the bath, pressing her back against the wall so she was facing Sherlock. "I is gonna gets you!" She grabbed her Papa's hand happily and pushed it away as hard as she could with her feet. "You is making a mess, Papa!" More laughing as she continued to splash at him, grinning when she saw the water on his bare chest.

"Oh no! A very pretty Princess is getting me all wet!" Sherlock continued to laugh and splash the water with little Sandi. He hadn't let himself be or feel this carefree in long time and it felt good actually. This was exactly what he had needed while on vacation.

Thomas nodded and then pressed his face back into John's chest. "Thank you Dad. I love you." He wrapped his arms around his Dad in tight hug. After a moment he looked back at the bathroom and then back to John. "I think a Princess needs saving. Come Squire John, let's go save her!"

All John could do was sit there and watch as Thomas moved back to the bathroom, his eyes a bit wide was he tried to process everything. It had been a while since he'd heard his son say that and he wanted to enjoy every second of it. "You go save our Princess," he said softly, the smile on his face nearly touching his ears. "I'm going to get dressed.

"Help, Knight 'Mas!" Amy shouted from the bathtub as she turned on to her side, the water splashing a bit at her face as the bandage from the day before started to come off of her chin. "I is fighting another water monster and I needs rescuing now!"

"The Knight won't be able to save you this time Princess!" Sherlock did his best to ignore the fact that little Sandi's bandage was coming off. He had a tendency to be an over protective father, especially with Amy. They could continue the game a little longer though, her chin didn't seem to be bleeding.

Thomas skidded to a halt outside the bathroom door. "But I need your help Squire John!" He looked back up at his Dad, his eyes practically begging John to join in other family game.

Now it felt like John didn't really have a choice so he stood up, making his way toward the bathroom with a smile. "Off we go, Knight Thomas!" He picked the boy up and opened the door with a small growl. "Water Monster Papa!" He set Thomas down and instantly moved forward to ruffle his husband's hair.

Amy clearly didn't mind that she was unclothed in front of her whole family - who really did at three years old? - and instantly stood up as her backup arrived. "Gets him! Helps a'cause I is a Princess and we doesn't fights!"

Sherlock kept splashing and gave a small growl. "Oh no! Not The Knight's acclaimed Squire! Whatever will I do now!" He tried to growl again and ended up laughing instead.

Thomas grinned happily when his Dad came to play too. He puffed out his chest, taking his role as Knight seriously like he always did. "Stop foul fiend! You will unhand the Princess at once or I will be forced to smite you!"

"Acclaimed Squire indeed! How dare you harm the Princess!" John dropped his head down and grinned happily at his husband, placing a quick kiss on the man's lips before moving to playfully pick up their soaking wet daughter. "Fear not, beautiful Princess, for I have come with my trusted Knight and he shall fight off the water monster!"

Amy looked down at her Papa and stuck her tongue out the moment she was in John's arms, clearly happy about the fact that she was far up in the air and away from his reach. "Get the monster, Knight 'Mas! He mights eat me!"

"No! The Princess is mine!" Sherlock stayed on the ground as he reached up his arms to try and grab little Sandi from John's arms. "Bah! I need the water, I can't live without it!" He dramatically dropped his hands back into the tub, making a it splash everywhere.

"You will never get the Princess!" Thomas moved forward and reached into the tub, unplugging it. "Without water, you are through monster! Now leave our majestic and peaceful kingdom!"

John held Amy up just a bit higher, watching as the water trained from the bathtub and killed off their horrid water monster infestation. "And Knight Thomas saves the day!" After a loud whistle he zoomed Amy out of the room, sound effects and all, and sat her down on the bed as he wrapped a towel around her small body. "All right, Princess," he said softly, picking out clothes for her day. The weather was supposed to be sunny and warm so he settled on a soft yellow dress and a pair of comfortable shoes.

"Likes that," Amy declared with a nod as her Dada dried her hair off. "And we has a bow, too, Dada, to matches it." She watched him as he pulled out a pair of underwear, eagerly sliding them on before pulling her small dress over her head. Before long John had managed to put the yellow bow in her hair, as well.

Sherlock made a mock gurgling noise as he 'died' from the water being drained. He dried his hands a bit before ruffling Thomas' hair. "Beaten again." He smiled down at their son, took the boy's hand and walked them back into bedroom. "T.C. there is another bag in my duffel bag, will you get for me while I clean up and change?" The bag had things they would need. A camera, ID's, extra clothes for everyone, just in case, and other random items he thought would be appropriate. It was the only bag he had prepared himself when everyone had been packing.

Thomas puffed out his chest with pride, clearly ecstatic that his Daddy had asked for his help. He ran over to his Daddy's big bag and took out a smaller one that was in it. His Daddy really was amazing and perfect. The man always thought of everything. Maybe someday he could be half as good, because he never really expected to be as great as his Daddy.