The Fullmetal Alchemist Christmas Collection
Song 11: Edward Got Run Over By an Armstrong
Author: MoonStarDutchess
Dedicated to Sophie who inspired the idea even though she wasn't trying.
Disclaimer: I don't own FMA or the song this parody's. This parody's Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer.
September 2015 - This was originally posted as a separate story quite a few years ago, but I want to clean up my account a bit so I decided to delete it there and post it in this collection. Hope you like it.
Edward Got Run Over By an Armstrong
Walking home from HQ on a workday eve
You can say that no such thing could happen
But as for us and Edward, we believe
-/-/-
He'd been bitching about being too short
And was inching for a fight
He was so mad that he was blind
And stumbled off into the night.
When we found him the next morning
At the scene of the attack
There were sparkles on his forehead
And Armstrong's footprints on his back.
-/-/-
Edward Got Run Over By an Armstrong
Walking home from headquarters on a workday eve
You can say that no such thing could happen
But as for us and Edward, we believe
-/-/-
Now we're all so proud of Alphonse
He's taking it so well
He's there playing with kittens
And doesn't have to keep Edward out of jail
It's just not the same without Edward
All the family's dressed in blue
And we just can't help but show some respect
By wearing lifts in our shoes.
-/-/-
Edward Got Run Over By an Armstrong
Walking home from headquarters on a workday eve
You can say that no such thing could happen
But as for us and Edward, we believe
-/-/-
Now the bowl is on the table
It's full of lovely small mints
And the Hors d' oeuvres are lovely
A very good variety of shrimps.
I've warned all the guards and civilians
They'd better watch out for themselves
If they should see sparkles
They should run like a bat out of hell
-/-/-
Edward Got Run Over By an Armstrong
Walking home from headquarters on a workday eve
You can say that no such thing could happen
But as for us and Edward, we believe
