Project fiction

Neanmois Devoue

Fan fiction by: Chryszm

This is solely a fan fiction made due to addictiveness to the Harry potter Series book, I of course do not own the series, but simple a fan who loves to write and have been inspired by J.K. Rowling's story.

CHAPTER X: Mixed Feelings

Her circumstances

"Let the lover be disgraceful, crazy, and absent-minded.
Someone sober will worry about events going badly.
Let the lover be."

It feels kind of awkward when I'm alone with James potter. I often think of Albus, and not James. I know they're brothers and that they differ from each other too, but I can't help but think about him while I'm with his elder brother.

It kind of feels unusual, to always hang around with the one you don't really like. James was always there for when since way back then, but I think of him as my elder brother. He often helps me out, it's because he's such a kind guy.

But I don't know if I feel something for him…

"Emily!" said James.

He was helping me out with some moves in the air. I'm really happy to play Quidditch and be around the potter brothers. The only reason why I entered myself and trained hard to get into the Quidditch team was when Albus and I were in our second year; this was because I wanted to spend more time with Albus. Little did I know that the attraction I felt when we were in our second year would develop unintentionally and cause myself to like him…

Love him

"Oh, sorry James!" I replied.

I've had enough flying for a while, I constantly remember him every day. I know I'm kind of a little late right now because he already has Joelle who often shows up at practice now.

"You just rest alright" he marked.

"James! I've been looking for you! I wanted to borrow your notes in transfiguration! I was feeling ill this morning" voiced Odette.

It was obvious that she was constantly pestering James every now and then because EVERYBODY knows, even Scorpious, her ex, that She LIKES JAMES POTTER! While James here is the only dense guy who hasn't notice yet!

How I wished that he could just snap, turn his head and notice Odette since she's driving me crazy. She also thinks I'm her competition, competition for winning James. As if James likes me more than a friend! Jeez

"Why don't you borrow your friend Jessie or Jonnie something's notes, the one you always hang around with? And Stop bothering me" he voiced back. He looked annoyed, too annoyed since he had his brows knitted so close.

"Well she wasn't listening" she insisted. Odette rolled her eyes, Duh, as if any of Odette's friends listen in class, they all just talk about stuff, shoes in particular.

"Well I didn't listen too" replied James. Of course that's a lie since his best subject is transfiguration.

"Hey James come here for a second" shouted Albus. I felt a kind of big lumpy feeling inside my chest; it kind of weighs a lot. I couldn't look at Albus's face, because I'm scared of what kind of facial expression he'll give if I look up and met his gaze.

It felt quite lonely without Rose watching me around; she's stuck in the Hospital wing with a cold. But I wonder how she got that, I mean she hasn't been sick since back then when we all went out in our first year with our pajamas on to celebrate the news of Gryffindor having won the Quidditch cup!

"Hey! Want to go and visit Rose later?" asked James who suddenly emerged from behind.

I suppose he finally had the time to finished arguing with Odette, usually it takes him about an hour just to get Odette out of the picture.

"That's a great idea!" I replied eagerly.

He smiled and then winced.

I wonder why?

After walking in silence for a while I felt him tense up a little and turned his face towards me to speak.

"About tomorrow… want to go and buy early Christmas gifts the seasons coming near!" He suddenly said. He looked nervous somehow.

"Yeah, I'd love that!" I replied.

My response seems to have made him relax.

After practice James and I both headed straight to the Hospital wing to visit Rose. But before we reached the room I hear Rose whispering, as if talking with somebody but when we arrived I found Rose alone sitting upright in her bed looking surprised to see us.

Weird…

"ROSE!" I bellowed.

"I've missed you! You've been neglecting us and yourself!" I continued. I really miss her so much. I hugged her tightly, kind of choking her in an unintentional way. She smiled back and kissed my cheeks while he waved her hand to James.

"Hello" said James. He grinned at the sight of his cousin lying in bed in the hospital wing.

"Oh… Hello James! What a surprise to see you here… with EMILY" she said eying on us suspiciously. She put a deep emphasis in the word EMILY, my name.

"Now don't jump to conclusions! I'm your cousin right?!" he replied sparingly.

"Yeah right" shot Rose back and rolled her eyes.

"Oh what's that sound?" I asked.

There were weird hissing noises coming from somewhere near.

I turned and looked around, trying to find out where the weird hissing noises came from but without luck.

"OHH! No nothing! Well you both better get going, it's getting late! If Madam Pompfrey catches you here you'll all have a wonderful trip to detention" said Rose who stammered a lot. She suddenly looked nervous, as if she were hiding something.

I wonder…

"Ok then, you take care ok?!" I replied. I decided to ignore her bizarre expression and gave her a peck on the cheek and went out with James.

As soon as we went out and headed back to the common room we both spotted Ermine Abott who was the famous beautiful Slytherin girl heading her way to the Hospital wing, her long hair bouncing as if it were as light as a feather.

She looked like she was dancing instead of walking and the perfume she had was overflowing in the air, today she smelled of strawberry. Her favorite scent was always vanilla, I wonder why she changed it?

I doubt she'd go in the hospital wing to visit Rose. Or will she?

Lately I've been thinking too much! Of course she won't!

"So see you tomorrow then?!" interrupted James.

"Yeah" I replied but not looking at him, he seems to turn his face towards me a lot. I wonder why, I mean it's not that I have a disgusting face but he's been really, and I mean really, been focused on looking at my face lately.

Maybe I have a pimple or something; I'll look at it in the mirror later.

"Hey morning" said a familiar voice which belonged to James potter.

I notice that he's a bit prepared for today. He wore a brown hazel jacket which matched his eyes and the Gryffindor Scarf around his neck. His jeans were of dark blue and his hair still messy as if he's just flown over the Quidditch pitch and finished practice. He looked quite happy.

"Hey!" I beamed at him. His happiness was quite contagious.

"Shall we?" asked James. I nodded.

We headed for the gate and the next thing we knew we were both walking in the alley. There were already a lot of students starting to buy their Christmas presents for everyone, Christmas break was coming near; about 2 more weeks I think. James and I both stopped first at the best shop ever, the Quidditch Supplies.

We both went and stall some time looking at the wonderful new brooms which were dead expensive; I'm certain that when Malfoy gets a load of these he'd instantly buy it, rich brat!

"Do you want to get something to drink?" James whispered. He seems charming today, every now and then he'd accompany me and assist me. I've never seen this side of him this is so surprising.

"Okay!" I said. And we both went out and grab some drinks at the Three Broomsticks.

Time seemed to pass by quickly that I found myself heading back to Hogwarts; my hands full of shopping bags, James as well. I happen to have a lot of fun today; it's been long since I've felt this way.

"This was quite fun" I told James who almost dropped one of his bags.

"R-really? D-do you think so?" he asked as he straightened himself.

"Yeah!" I replied and smiled at him.

I don't know why but I seem to be appreciated when I'm with James. It's as if I'm sharing the burden with him, lessening the pain…

"You know, it's nice to see you happy again" he said.

"Why?" I curiously asked.

"Well, last week in Quidditch practice it seemed like you were about to die any minute. You were drained out of energy, but now…" he said looking at me and showing me his wonderful famous James potter smile which he only showcased during Quidditch matches.

"Y-yeah R-right" I replied. I don't know why but suddenly I feel like I'm getting intimidated.

Intimidated by James

"Sometimes when you want to forget things, you have to remember them. That way you'd forget about them. Like when we remember something then forget it again the next morning? It's easy as that" said James.

"So to forget I must remember? Isn't that well… unpractical? Because that way you'd be able to feel the angst or whatever sentiment you don't or you felt… once" I replied unsure of what I was really trying to say.

"But isn't it better to get over the sentiment? Because once you've felt it again it won't be painful like the first time you'd felt it" he happily replied.

I thought of Albus, and again the pain in my chest was excruciating. It was a chance I could've taken, a mistake I could've repaired in some way but now that I reminisce about it…

It hurts more!

"I see you've started to follow my advice" he said eyeing on me.

"I-I don't know what you're talking about" I instantly replied.

"Well, doesn't matter as long as it makes you feel better" he said. And then the most shocking thing occurred…

He showed me his smiling face and made my heart forget all the things about Albus. All the mistakes I've committed and all the bad things that have occurred, it was as if they instantly disappeared.

"Emily, I had a great time. Well, I always have a great time when I hang out with you" James suddenly said.

"Oh yeah you too" I replied. Then he gave me one of his shopping bags, it was a small package, a bit flat.

"Here, it's my early Christmas present" he said.

"Wow, but isn't it a bit too early? Why don't you just give it to me like you always do at Christmas Eve?" I asked curiously.

"Well, I don't want my sister to get jealous" he said and gave me a peck on the cheek. This made me feel stiff, unmovable as if rooted to the ground, surprised, curious, embarrassed, intimidated, played at, and SHOCKED!

Very

Very

Very

Very

… Shocked

"See you" he said shifting all of the bags in one hand freeing his other hand and waved at me.

He's so tall and handsome that whatever he wore, whatever he did was always charming. But I can't believe he actually gave me a peck on the cheek!!! Especially in a crowded place, here at the entrance gate, with a lot of onlookers!

He left me bewildered awed etc.

Mixed feelings; I mean he never did that to me. He almost kissed me last year but that was by accident.

Now it happened!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I'm sorry but I haven't thought of posting a Vaughen point of view story, to keep some mystery :D. Well just for now, I haven't thought of writing in his perspective. Maybe if I were to write one we'd be staring at a blank page because he doesn't express himself well , or like mechanical instructions, like "we met then said our goodbyes etc", not very detailed! Thanks for the correction! And for the Review! And to everybody as well! Gracias!