Another dare :)

Dare: Write Sirius Black's best man speech on James' marriage. (Pre-written texts not acceptable)

The Best Man's Speech (Sirius Black)

"Sit down, sit down!" Sirius demanded the moment Peter finished his speech. Remus rolled his eyes and shook his head at him. He was the best man! His speech was the one that was the most anticipated! Peter was just making everybody wait longer than they had to. "Okay, okay. Everybody pipe down!" He looked down to where James was sat by his side and could see he was supressing his laughter.

"I am Sirius Black! The best man for James Potter!" He announced. Everybody had quietened down and were looking at him unblinkingly. It almost made him uncomfortable. "I have known James for a very long time. We were best friends in school and continued to be after it. I have to say, nobody ever caught James' attention like I did." The crowd let out a hearty laugh and Sirius bowed, making James and Remus snort. After a moment the guests had their full attention back on him. "Well, apart from Lily of course." A chorused awww went up and Sirius smirked at Lily's blush. She was almost as red as her hair. "Honestly, I don't think I've ever seen a better match! I remember when you used to take her out for walks. The moonlight shining on you both." He carried on despite wanting to laugh at James' shocked face. He knew he had caught the reference. Peter and Remus looked like they had too, if Peter's open mouth was anything to go by.

"I remember how James tried to show off in Care of Magical Creatures so Lily would be impressed. He was digging and nearly screamed when he shovelled up a huge worm. Its tail was wriggling and everything." Remus had his face in his hands but Sirius could see his shoulders shaking with laughter. Peter was trying to conceal his grin but was failing and James was trying to do everything in his power to avoid Lily's inquisitive gaze.

"Oh and there was one time he got distracted when Lily walked into the great hall. He dropped his knife on his foot! He had to wear a cotton wool pad on his foot for the next week. We wouldn't stop teasing him about it. Lily, of course, was clueless as to how her mere presence affected dear James." James was as red as Lily now.

"All in all, I think their relationship has aged well. Like antlers on a stag-"

"How drunk are you?" Came a shout from the back of the room and the crowd sniggered.

"Not drunk enough!" He shouted back. "Anyway, your futures are before the two of you. All ready for you to map it out." He smiled and raised his glass. "To James and Lily," he shouted, "who found each other's hearts to maraud!" He sat back down and yelled as three well-aimed kicks hit him. It was drowned out by the roar of the guests.