The next day, both me and sempai was called to the head doctors office. We were scolded badly as not only we fought in a patients room but the patient sustained more injuries because of us. The head doctor asked us what happened. I was reluctant to say anything but then sempai explained. He took all the blame. The head doctor was reluctant to punish us, so he only gave us a warning. He was understanding but made us swear that

this would not happen the second time.

As we left the room and stood at the empty hallway, I asked sempai "Why did you took all the blame?" eventhough we got equal punishments, i still wanted to ask.

"Because I am the senior. Besides I punched you first. You deserved it but- yeah." We both stayed silent. Then sempai broke the silence. "I was jealous of you."

"What?" I did not understand what sempai was saying. Jealous?

"Yeah, even though I am ahead of you but for you to achieve what you have now is not that easy. I know. It was hard for me too. To see a junior under me complete everything with such ease made me pissed. Plus that- I think I have fallen for Hiroki."

"You cant have him! He is mine!" I wont let sempai take him away from me. Hiro-san is my everything.

"I know, took you long enough to realize. Sheesh." sempai was sighing as he checked his pager. "Eh?" I dont understand what sempai is trying to say.

"Look, everyone gets angry. Even I did. Im sorry about that but you should think about Hiroki. How could you get his hopes up by saying you love him and you hate him the next day. Are you playing with his feelings?!" Sempai was saying all of that with a stern tone.

"No, I was not...I-I wanted Hiro-san to be happy. So I thought, he would be better off without me." I looked down to my shoes. It was my fault he got hurt.

"Are you an idiot! He is head over heels in love with you! He always comes by the hospital looking and waiting for you! He dislikes other people touching or calling him by his first name. But not you! You should stop acting like an idiot and think straight! God, whats gotten into you!" sempai is getting angry again.

But what sempai said made me realize. I have been an idiot. A real idiot. Hiro-san was trying to explain but I shut my ears. He wanted to apologize but I left him instead. He was going to forgive me...and I ended up saying I hate him. I am such an asshole. I realize all of this and knelt to the floor. Hiro-san is injured more because of me now.

Sempai stared at me and turned around. "I hope you noticed what a big dick you are now. I will leave Hiroki's care to you. See you later." sempai walked away.

"Hey, sempai." I called him, he stopped and looked back at me. "Thanks for everything...and please dont call Hiro-san by his first name." I smiled lightly too him. Even sempai grinned at me.

"Okay, okay. I got it you big dick. See ya." Sempai walked away.

I got up as I now have to deal with a much bigger problem. Hiro-san. I went to his room. When I opened the door, the sight killed me. Hiro-san was sitting up but is staring blankly to the tv in front of him.

Since this morning, Hiro-san has not said a word to anyone. He woke up silent. Me and sempai asked him questions but as he looked at my face, his face looked sad and frightened. Even when Miyagi-san came over as he usually does every morning, Hiro-san did not utter a word. He sat there like a doll, unexpressive. Miyagi-san was pissed at me as he knows this is my fault. He did not do anything but he warned me "If this goes on, you bastard. Hiroki would be staying with me. Get out of my sight."

Now i realize that I dont want to hand Hiro-san to anyone. I am so stupid realizing this now. I love Hiro-san so much! I promised to treasure him more. But what I am doing is the exact opposite.

I closed the door behind me. Walked to Hiro-san and shut off the tv. I sat down to talk to him. "Hiro-san, can you hear me? Please look at me Hiro-san. I want to talk to you."

Nothing came out from his mouth. His silence may be caused by the trauma.

I grabbed hold of his hand and called out his name. He jolted and pulled his hand away. Hiro-san was shivering slightly. He- is afraid of me.

It took so long for me to get through the wall that Hiro-san build around him to protect himself. But when he exposed his vulnerability to me, I ended up crushing him! This is my karma. But the one suffering the most is Hiro-san. Not me.

"Hiro-san, please listen to me. I wont get angry at you anymore. I promise." I got up and sat on his bed. He looked away and starts to move further from me. I dont want him to fall off his bed again so I grabbed on to him. He was afraid and starts to push me away.

"G-get away from me!" Hiro-san finally spoke. But such sad words.

"Hiro-san please listen to me. I want to apologize, I am so sorry. I really regret what I have done to you. Please, please listen to me." I tried to reason with him in a gentle tone. I was careful with my words.

Hiro-san was shaking. "Please- leavee me alone. I dont want to talk to you- right now." Hiro-san looked away.

"No, I have made up my mind. I will not leave you ever again no matter what. I love you so much. Please dont be scared of me. I am not mad anymore. My heart feels so tight. I cant stand seeing Hiro-san so broken.

"Y-y-you're lying" Hiro-san voice was shaky as he starts to cry. He continued by saying "You h-hate me right? You dont love me. All you said way a lie. H-how can I believe you ?" He is sobbing. He must be in so much pain. How many time does this make, that I have made him cry?

I hugged him carefully. He protested by trying to push me away with his weak hands but I did not budge. If i did, I feel like it would be over for us. "Dont cry Hiro-san, please I beg of you. I will apologize as many times as you want. I am sorry. I did not mean it when I said I hate you. I was just angry. And i let it out on you. I am so sorry!" my voice was full of remorse. I stroked on his hair gently as I did not want to touch the stitches on his head that is still healing.

"You promised that you would treasure me..." Hiro-san added. A knife went through my heart.

"I know, I am really sorry." I cant retort. What he said was true. I did the exact opposite of my promise.

"You said you would never leave me..." Hiro-san's voice sounded more sad and hoarse.

"Im sorry..." I cant say anything else.

"I am not cheating on you- w-why would you say that?! You d-didnt listen to me." his sobbings got louder.

I hugged him a bit tighter. I made sure to look out for his injuries. "I-I am really sorry. I have been such a horrible partner to you."

I looked at his crying face. And he just stared at me with tears filling his eyes. His face is flushed. "Would you forgive me for being such an idiot Hiro-san?" I said to him.

Hiro-san continued to stare at me. He did not say a single word but just kept on crying. I knew I couldnt be forgiven that easily. I hugged him again then patted on him gently, tried to hush him. If he keeps on crying, it would stress the body and his eyes will get more swollen then it already is. Hiro-san grabbed on my robe and he starts to calm down. I held him until he stopped crying. "I am so sorry Hiro-san. I love you so much." I said to him.

After that...Hiro-san caught a high fever.