Bina and I were twelve when we first got into her Dad's beer. He had already had a few that night and we decided that he wouldn't mind if we stole a couple from him. We snuck into the liquor cabinet and ran downstairs, collapsing together on the couch and giggled as we popped off the tops. Bina counted to three and we took a big gulp at the same time. It was so bitter, my eyes watered as I fought the urge to spit it out and forced it down my throat.

"Wow," Bina cried, her eyes lighting up. "This tastes..."

"Weird." I replied, but Bina took a few more gulps, finishing it off. I drank the rest of mine as well, not wanting to look like a loser in front of her when she always seemed so knowing. I remember a lot of giggling that night, but her Dad didn't find out about any of his alcohol missing until we were fourteen, then he reprimanded us, told my Dad and we both got grounded for a couple weeks. It didn't stop Bina at all, but I hardly touched it.

With the tension in the past few weeks and everything that was going on here. From me moving to a new school, to this mysterious group of Sam's that kept expanding, Jake and I had been pretty distracted. A lot of the time before this, there was mostly sexual tension that we had to deal with, but it had settled down for the moment, or we didn't notice it as much right now, and we were like an old couple. Essentially we were, I don't even remember the transiton from friends to dating. I was feeling kind of down about the whole situation when Jake pulled into my driveway Sunday morning, looking happy on the outside, but the moment that I opened the door and our eyes met, I knew that something was troubling him, as was the problem lately.

"Hey you." I smiled at him, giving him a quick hug.

"Hey." He came in the door and followed me into the kitchen, where I grabbed two bowls and the box of Fruit Loops from the cupboard and two spoons from the drawer. I set them in front of him, grabbing the milk from the fridge.

"So what's up?" I asked, sitting down at the chair next to him. I interrupted him as he opened his mouth to say something. "And I don't want to hear 'nothing'. I want to know what's really up."

"Well, it seems that Sam's recruited another one." Jake spat, he set his elbow on the table and leaned into it.

"Another one?" I asked, trying to prompt him into telling me who. He would, because Jake has never kept anything from me.

"Yeah." He seemed really down today, and he ate quietly for a few minutes.

"Who was it?" I said, tentatively. His eyes flickered up to mine for a second.

"Embry." My jaw dropped and I swore my heart stopped for a moment. Embry? Shy, sweet Embry?

"B-b-b.." I stuttered, not making any sense.

"Yeah, I know." Jake said bitterly.

"No." I managed. How could he take Embry? He's been with us since we were little, best friends. "He's sick."

"It doesn't look like it anymore" Jake let out a great sigh, like the world was pushing down on him.

"So," I started meekly. "Has he changed as well?"

"He's changed everything about himself, and it was just this morning that I saw him with Sam, Jared and Paul. He wouldn't even talk to me." Jake's usual happy mood was missing, and it was almost like missing an arm. I felt so bad for him. "Just gave me a sad look, couldn't even look at me through his hair like he normally would, because it's gone!"

"Oh my-"

"Yeah. There's something different about him too, there's something about all of them that I just can't figure out. It's like they're all the same, and different. Sam keeps giving me these looks..." Jake started in on a quiet rant that filled up about twenty minutes. I listened closely, as he was clearly hurt from the snub from Embry today. I really did listen too, because I genuinely cared about his well-being, and my friends. I felt really responsible a lot of the time when they got hurt, and this was just the same. By the sounds of it, Sam had talked Embry into joining his stupid group. Anger flared up inside me at the thought of it. Embry was our friend.

"This is stupid." I seethed after he was done.

"I know." His worn eyes met mine as he said it and for a small fraction of time, I could feel his pain and fatigue. It hit me like a shockwave, and I realized how stressed Jake has been forever, but has never let anyone see it. He usually didn't let it bother him throughout the day, but everything lately had been taking it's toll on him and it was coming out. My hand reached out towards his face of it's own accord and I brushed it over Jake's soft cheek. He nuzzled into it, closing his eyes and letting a small smile slip.

"Jake..." I started, not completely sure where I was going with it. He opened his eyes and looked at me. It had always amazed me how expressive his eyes were; how much he could say with just one look. He took both of my hands in his.

"Bella." He smiled. "I know how hard things have been for us lately and I know how it feels like things between us have settled down, and you're worrying about it."
I raised my eyebrows in surprise. I kept forgetting how perceptive he was as well. He reached out and smoothed out the wrinkles in my forehead. He gracefully brought his chair over so that it was right in front of mine. His hands slipped up around my head, one tangling through my hair and one on the side of my neck. His eyes burned into mine, now smoldering as he leaned in and brushed his lips, softly, just barely against mine as his thumb traced my jaw. My heart flip-flopped at the touch and the butterflies in my stomach shot all the way around my body, causing a tingling sensation all throughout. The hand left my neck, raising goosebumps and looped around my waist, pulling me onto his lap with ease so that I was now straddling him.

"I don't want you to worry about it." Jake said, his voice low, and slightly shaky. I didn't give him the chance to talk any further, pressing my lips to his and then deepening the kiss. It was glorious, and I hadn't realized how much I missed the small moments like these, his soft lips yielding to mine, bodies pressed together, fitting to each other like it was meant to be.

Jake broke off the kiss, as my hands were up his shirt, nails running down his back. His hands were grazing my pantline as if they couldn't decide whether or not to go further and his breathing was laboured as he looked at me, his eyes black with lust, and it was silent for a few minutes as we looked at each other. I worked on slowing my heart down and breathing normal again. His hand softly picked mine up and he kissed my fingertips tenderly.

"I know that we won't settle down." I said quietly. "Like you mean."

"It has been hard though, and there's been a lot going on." He replied. "I wish that everything wasn't screwed up so that we wouldn't have to slow down."

"Why don't we just not?" I whispered, rolling my hips. His hands quickly caught them and stopped it. I was being irrational, and I knew exactly why, but my hormones were getting the better of me. Jake smiled and brushed a piece of hair behind my ear

"Because you only get one chance, and ours is going to be perfect." His voice was soothing, persuasive, gentle. The look on his face was pure adoration. My heart jumped into my throat, and I wanted him that much more.

"If only everything wasn't so stupid right now." I slid off his lap and back into my chair. Jake smirked.

"Stupid? Everything is stupid right now?" He teased.

"Shut up. You know what I mean." I punched his knee lightly.

"You just have way too many hormones too deal with, you animal." He said jokingly, tweaking my nose.

"Ha. My hormones are the ones that are taking over." I replied sarcastically.

"How could I not?" Jake pretended to look astonished, holding a hand over his heart. "Look at you." His lean body came towards me and he placed a soft kiss under my jawline. I inhaled quickly as goosebumps raised all over my body.

"Look at me." I grumbled as he leaned back. "Look at you."

"What about me?" He tilted his head to the side, regarding me curiously. I looked up at him, his flawless russet skin, his dark shiny hair, his beautiful brown eyes framed by long lashes, his broad lips and constant smile.

"You're like..." I started, but paused, trying to think of the word. "You're gorgeous."

He laughed out loud, throwing his head back.

"Clearly you're delusional." He said, twirling his finger towards his head, the universal 'crazy' sign.

"I'm delusional?" I asked, astonished. "I'd say you're the insane one."

"Don't say that." He said softly, his smile mischeivious. "Or something might happen..."

He suddenly leaped out of his chair, swinging me up with him and ran around the small kitchen with me tucked into his arms. He jumped on the chairs and ran into the living room. He threw me onto the couch and jumped on top of me, knawing on my neck playfully. I was laughing so hard I couldn't breathe.

"No, you're definitely the crazy one." He said, leaning back on his heels, still pinning me down. I stared up at him, catching my breath as he retied his hair at the nape of his neck. "Bellsie, Bellsie." He then twirled a piece of my hair around his finger.

"Yes?" I peered up at him, and he smiled brilliantly down at me. "You know, Jake. I was-"

"No." He said, putting a finger to my lips. I ceased talking immediately. "I know what you were going to bring up, and today is about us, you're supposed to forget about everything, and everyone else."

"Okay." I complied, staring up at him.

"It's why I made my little speech earlier. Because, well... I want you. I'm tired of everything else making that hard to go through." He swallowed hard, looking over across the living room, then looked back at me, smoothing my eyebrow out, then tracing my lips. "I'm-"

He was cut off by the front door opening and Charlie calling out his greeting. Jake swore under his breath and had me up sitting beside him just as Charlie came into the room.

"Afternoon Chief." Jake said pleasantly, with an undercurrent of annoyance. Charlie obviously didn't catch it.

"Hey Dad." I said, smiling, but I couldn't take my eyes off Jake. He was about to say something uncomfortable for him, he was about to admit something, and Charlie cut him off.

"Hey Bells, Jake. Jake, it's funny, I brought Billy over to watch the game." Charlie looked cheerful today as he sat down in the chair. Billy wheeled in after him.

"A game?" Jake asked, "There aren't any games on right now, are there?"

"Sure there is son." Billy's coal black eyes flicked over to us. "Hello Bella." He gave me a small smile.

"Hey Billy." I replied. I waited for them to start a conversation amongst themselves before pulled closer to Jake.

"What were you going to tell me?" I whispered lowly, making sure our fathers wouldn't hear.

"It was nothing" He whispered back "I was just going to tease you about your seriousness." He squeezed my hand as if to reassure me. I took that explanation, but something bugged me about it, like I couldn't touch on what he was really trying to say.

We spent a while watching the game with Billy and Charlie, a way to spend time with them, and then took off for a walk around Forks, to the small playground, where we played on the equipment. We walked home as the sun was setting under the horizon and stopped when we reached the front doorstep. Jake looped his long arms around me into a hug. My feet left the ground as he squeezed me, and I tried to squeeze back just as hard.

"Oh Bella." He murmured into my hair. "I adore you."