The Biologist
Sometimes, Adelaide really regretted the fact the Doctor tended to take the lead on adventures.
"There's no way out of this," Clara shook her head. The three were chained to rather ornately carved pillars underneath a very strong pair of suns thanks to the Doctor's uncanny ability to get into trouble wherever he went. "We're going to die here."
"Pass me the vibro-cutters."
"They're in my pocket."
"Come on then, pass them to me."
Adelaide sighed, leaning her head back. "Clara has two jackets, Doctor."
"Why has she got two jackets? Is one of them faulty?"
"Look, I don't have the vibro-cutters. If I had the vibro-cutters, I wouldn't be able to pass you the vibro-cutters!" Clara shook her chained hands to prove her point. "We're going to starve to death out here.
"Of course we don't starve," the Doctor scoffed. "The sand piranhas will get us long before that."
Clara and Adelaide exchanged rather exasperated looks at that.
|C-S|
When Clara entered the TARDIS, she stopped almost immediately once she spotted the Time Lords. They were standing, the Doctor back against the console and Adelaide against him, looking like they were...hugging? Their foreheads were pressed together, so it didn't really seem like a traditional hug that Clara would have expected, but it was closer than she'd seen them get in some time.
The TARDIS had landed in her living room a few minutes ago, but Clara had taken a few moments to change her shoes into something better fitted for adventuring so the Time Lords had potentially had longer alone than they'd expected.
She didn't get to pause long because the Time Lords stepped apart, Adelaide moving to the side and the Doctor turning to address her. "Clara!"
Clara raised her eyebrows. "So...where we off to?"
The Doctor looked her over. "Clara, you...you look lovely today. Have you had a wash?"
She frowned at him. "What has Adelaide done to you? Why are you being nice?"
"He's made me slower, I've made him politer," Adelaide said, though her tone of voice made it clear that she was mocking the Doctor. "There's not going to be a trip today, Clara."
The Doctor nodded. "We've got to do a thing. It might take a while."
"What thing?"
He turned away the scanner close to Clara, not letting her see what it said. "Just a thing."
"You're being mysterious, and do you know what that means?"
He grinned. "I'm a man of mystery and Adelaide loves mysteries?"
"It means that you are a very clever woman" she looked at Adelaide "and a very foolish man" to the Doctor "making the mistake, common to very clever and very foolish people, of assuming that everybody else is stupid. Where are you going?" she grabbed the screen back but Adelaide managed to switch it to a view of the galaxy first.
"Undercover," the Doctor said. "Deep cover."
"Can you do deep cover?"
"What do you mean?"
Clara looked him up and down. "Have you seen you? I mean, Adelaide probably could, but you?"
The Doctor looked slightly offended. "Of course I can do deep cover."
Clara laughed. "Where, the Magic Circle?"
The Doctor snapped, opening the TARDIS door. "We'll see you when we see you."
Clara snapped, closing them. "When's that?"
Adelaide's snap that time. "When we see you."
"Hmm." Clara frowned at them. "Hmm...I'll be sure to have a wash."
"Excellent. I was meaning to bring it up."
It was only once Clara left the TARDIS that Adelaide switched the screen back to what it had been before. They'd just wanted to come to check on Clara, to ensure she was still safe, before they did what they needed to do.
There was something in London.
Specifically, near Coal Hill.
|C-S|
The Doctor couldn't help but keep looking at Adelaide as they hurried through the corridors of Coal Hill to the staff room. She'd adopted the appearance of a teacher – specifically, a biology teacher – and it was so odd to see how both uncomfortable and natural she looked in it. Natural because this was what she was, she was a scientist, a problem-solver, a discoverer.
But uncomfortable because she wasn't really a teacher, not anymore.
He, on the other hand, felt quite nice in his position as a janitor – or caretaker, as he liked to think of it. He'd almost thought to look into carrying a broom all the time but then Adelaide had told him that would mean he'd have to clean up his own messes.
The idea hadn't seemed so appealing then.
"...just one more thing," the headmaster was saying as they approached, having ended up a bit late due to their slight disagreement on how to interpret the instructions they'd been given, as it had contradicted the map the TARDIS had provided them. "Katheryn's on vacation and Atif's off sick, so we've got some newbies. I did ask them to come along..." The Doctor knocked. "Ah, here they are."
The door opened and the Time Lords weren't surprised to see Clara standing at the front of the group of teachers, looking quite shocked at the sight.
Especially given that the two of them were holding hands. In public.
"Hello," Adelaide nodded. "I'm Kathryn's substitute, Adelaide Attwater."
The Doctor waved. "And I'm the new caretaker. John Smith."
One of the male teachers nodded at them. "Welcome to Coal Hill, Ms. Attwater, Mr. Smith."
"Thanks. Yes, John Smith's the name. But, you know, here's a thing. Most people just call me the Doctor." He winked at Clara for that one. "So, if anybody needs me, just, you know, give me a shout. I'll be in the storeroom just getting the lie of the land or with my sweetheart here." He held up their hands, making it clear to the gathered teachers that he and Adelaide were a 'pair'.
They'd considered just showing up as friends, but had decided that it would be easier to explain why they'd need to be seeing a lot of each other if they let people think they were dating.
Which, in actuality, they were, in a way.
Just not in the traditional way humans would expect.
It was a new concept for Adelaide and she'd yet to decide how she actually felt about it.
The rest of the teachers nodded and the Time Lords stepped apart to let them leave, having an assembly to get to. Adelaide had been excused from attending in order to get the lay of the lab's organization. The Doctor gestured towards the door as they all passed. "Yes, nobody's taking any notice at all. Absolutely good news because it means we must be coming across just as absolutely boring humans like you." As Clara passed them, she clearly lagged in order to speak to them, but the Doctor just closed the door in her face.
"Rude."
"Deep cover."
Adelaide shook her head at him. "I'll let the halls clear a bit before I go."
Just as she said that the door opened again and Clara strode back in, arms crossed. "So, you recognized us, then," the Doctor said, putting away his map of the building – now amended to fit the actual layout of the building.
"You're wearing different coats," she said, gesturing at the two Time Lords.
"But you saw straight through that."
Clara raised her eyebrows. "Deep cover in my school? Why? Where's Katheryn? Where's Atif? What have you done with them?"
When she took a step forward, the Doctor gestured her back with the broom. "Atif's fine. Hypnotized. He thinks he's got the flu."
"Also a flying car and three wives," Adelaide added. "But don't worry, he'll be fine. And Katheryn's actually on vacation right now, I just intercepted a request for a substitute."
"Is it aliens?" Clara's eyes widened. "Oh my God, is that why you're here? Are there aliens?"
"There's an assembly," Adelaide reminded her. "Don't want to be late."
"Go and worship something."
Clara stepped forward. "Are there aliens in this school?"
"Listen, it's lovely talking to you, but we've really got to get on. I'm a caretaker now. Look, I've got a brush." He held it up.
"Adelaide, is there an alien in this school?"
"Yes, two," Adelaide nodded.
"Now go." He gestured her out again. "The walls need sponging, there's a sinister puddle, and Adelaide has a lab to reorganize."
"I'm not going to reorganize it..."
Clara shook her head. "You can't do this. You two cannot pass yourselves off as real people among actual people. Even Adelaide's a bit too odd for that."
The Doctor shrugged. "I lived among otters once for a month." He paused. "Well, I sulked. Adelaide and I'd had a bit of a disagreement..."
"That had not been a 'bit of a disagreement'," she corrected. "And you were there for about two days."
"Human beings are not otters!" Clara cut in.
"Exactly." The Doctor nodded. "It'll be even easier."
Clara sighed. "Okay. One question. And you will answer this question, both of you. Are the kids safe?"
"No," the Doctor said simply. "Nobody is safe. But soon the answer will be yes, everybody is safe, if you let us get on."
"It'll be best if you pretend you don't know us," Adelaide said. "We will explain later, I promise."
The Doctor nodded at the door. "Go and sing with the otters."
The human tightened her jaw. "I hate you."
The Doctor looked to Adelaide for defense, but she provided him with none. "That's a perfectly normal reaction."
It served to get the smallest of smiles from Clara before she exited the room.
|C-S|
Clara sat at the front of her very bored English class as they read Pride and Prejudice. Part of her almost wished something strange would happen just so that she could have a break from the monotonous reading of teenagers who didn't really want to be there. "Though unheard by Lydia, was caught by Elizabeth, and as it assured her that Darcy was not..." one of the boys was reading.
At the back of the room, through the window, Clara saw someone she certainly did not want to see at a window.
The Doctor was on a ladder.
Clara stood, cutting off the boy who was reading. "You alright, Miss Oswald?"
"Yes, Kelvin, I'm fine. You carry on."
Kelvin nodded, looking down again. "Every feeling of displeasure against the former was so sharpened..."
Clara hurried down the line of students to the back of the room, pulling a chair over in order to be at the Doctor's height. "Can I help you, Mr. Smith?" she said, speaking as quietly as she could as the whole class turned to look at her.
"Wrong," the Doctor said.
"I'm sorry?"
"On the board. Wrong. Wrong."
Clara looked back at her writing on the board before turning back. "Oh, no, no, no, no. You don't do this. You are the caretaker, this is not what you do."
He shrugged. "Just taking care."
"Not your area!"
"Jane Austen wrote Pride and Prejudice in 1796."
Clara cleared her throat and turned to address the class, who was still staring at the pair of them. "This is Mr. Smith, the temporary caretaker, and he's a bit confused."
"Not in 1797," the Doctor continued, not overly bothered by Clara's complaints, "because she didn't have the time. She was so busy doing all..."
"Oh, what?" Clara turned back to face the Doctor. "I suppose she was your bezzie mate, was she? And you and Adelaide and she went on holidays together and then you got kidnapped by Boggons from space and then you all formed a band and met Buddy Holly."
The Doctor blinked. "I don't even think Adelaide's met Jane Austen. I should ask her..." Clara raised her eyebrows. "I read the book. There's a bio at the back."
The children giggled at that, making Clara close her eyes for a moment and take a deep breath. "Get down."
The Doctor smirked. "Boggons?"
"Go." The school bell rang as the Doctor descended. "Right, that's it," Clara jumped down from the chair. "Well done, Kelvin. Get going. See you all in a couple of days. Thanks very much."
"Miss," Kelvin called as she reached the door, "what about our homework?"
"Who asks for homework?" she smiled. "Amateur."
|C-S|
As it turned out, Katheryn had made such a detailed lesson plan that Adelaide wasn't expected to do anything except sit at the front of the class and stop kids from spending too much time on their phones; Katheryn hadn't wanted to give a potentially unknowing substitute any lab work, so the students were just working on a series of worksheets.
It appeared that, despite her being a substitute and thus easy to prank or generally mess with, Adelaide exuded so much sternness that no one dared cross her. It had been something she'd been known for on Gallifrey too.
There was one particularly enthusiastic student, the kind Adelaide had always liked best, Tanya Adeola, who'd finished so quickly that Adelaide had ended up giving her interesting problems to keep her entertained for the rest of the lesson.
Once the bell rang, Adelaide hurried out to find the Doctor and ensure he hadn't gotten himself into any sticky situations.
She managed to find him in the courtyard working on a cabinet and chatting with two male teachers. Clara entered the courtyard from the other side, though students kept running up to tell her things.
"Of course, Danny Pink here is your man, Mr. Smith," one of the teachers was saying to the Doctor, gesturing towards the other. "Five years' military experience, sergeant, here and Afghan, so electrics, boilers, if you need a hand, give him a shout."
The man, Danny, shrugged. "I...I've helped Atif with a couple of things."
"I'll thank you for the offer for John since he doesn't tend to say thank you," Adelaide said, making all the men turn. Clara appeared on the other side, holding a watering can and looking very much like she was trying to spy without getting caught. "I don't believe we've met. Your names are?"
"Adrian Davies," the first man said, grinning. Now that Adelaide could see him properly, she was honestly a bit shocked to see how much he resembled the Doctor's previous incarnation, right down to the bow tie. "English."
Danny gave a little wave. "Danny Pink, maths." Adelaide almost blinked at his face as well. It was almost remarkable, how much he looked like the man they'd found at the end of the universe.
"Wonderful to meet you both." She looked down at the Doctor. "How are you getting on?"
"Peachy, fully qualified, no issues here," he said...just as something sparked. He turned to Danny. "You best get back to your PE class."
Danny shook his head. "I teach maths, I just said..."
The Doctor frowned. "Do you? What, in emergencies?"
"No, he's a maths teacher," Adelaide told him.
"Yeah," Adrian nodded, "he's a maths teacher." Something broke nearby and Adrian spun. "Mohammed, put that down!" he ran off.
"How does that work?" the Doctor continued. "What if the kids have questions?"
Danny frowned. "About what?"
"Maths."
"I answer them. I'm a maths teacher."
"But he said you were a soldier."
"Yeah. I was a soldier, now I'm a maths teacher."
The Doctor frowned. "But what about all the PE?"
"He doesn't teach PE," Adelaide said.
"Sorry," he shook his head, "that seems very unlikely."
Clara, meeting eyes with Adelaide, stepped forward. "Er, excuse me. Mr. Pink, I think class 9M4 are waiting."
The Doctor waved Danny away. "Yes, you better run along, Sergeant. That ball isn't going to kick itself, is it?"
Danny started to back away. "I...I'm not a PE teacher, I'm a maths teacher."
"Nope, sorry. No, I can't retain that. I've tried. It's just not going in."
Adelaide sighed. "I'm sorry, Danny. He can be extremely blunt and doesn't tend to think before he speaks."
Danny just gave the Doctor a look before hurrying off, letting Clara take his place. "So, Pink? The name remind you of anything?"
"Yeah," the Doctor nodded. "The color."
"Colonel Orson Pink," Adelaide told him.
Clara nodded. "The guy we met at the end of the universe."
"Oh, yeah. Okay, yeah. Same name, doesn't look anything like him though."
Adelaide and Clara exchanged another look. "Looks very like him."
"Does he?" the Doctor shrugged. "I don't know. Who remembers a PE teacher?"
"Someone with an ounce of manners?" Adelaide offered.
"You're polite for me," the Doctor waved, putting a device in the cabinet before locking it up. "I don't need to be polite if you're here."
Adelaide sighed.
Clara shook her head. "Oh, never mind." She glanced at the cabinet. "What are you doing? What...what's in there?"
"So, is he here then?" the Doctor said, straightening and taking Adelaide's hand for a second.
"Is who here?"
"The one that you keep going on serious dates with."
Clara raised her eyebrows. "If he is, are you going to start talking like a normal human being without Adelaide being there to stop you?"
"I promise I won't. I'm being nice."
"Doctor..." Adelaide said.
"Clara!" Adrian called, making Clara turn away from the Time Lords. "Got this period free, yes?"
"No," she answered quickly, before sighing. "Yes."
"Great. Shakespeare!"
"Sorry, what, Adrian?"
The Doctor nodded, his expression hardening. "Oh, I see."
"What?" Adelaide asked the Doctor, suitably annoyed about the fact the Doctor seemed to have noticed something Adelaide hadn't.
"Nothing." The Doctor waved her off. "Nothing at all."
"Excuse me," Adrian smiled at both of them. "We have to talk about The Tempest." He pulled Clara off.
The Doctor leaned a bit closer to Adelaide. "That's the boyfriend."
"Because he looks like your last regeneration?" he nodded. "What about any of your previous interactions with Clara gave you the impression that she'd desire to have a relationship with your human lookalike?" he opened his mouth and closed it again. "Exactly. Now, get back to work." Adelaide walked away, leaving the Doctor to smile after her.
|C-S|
Somehow the Doctor and Adelaide managed to walk up to the caretaker's storeroom at the exact same moment. She swore that he'd timed it thus, waiting until she ended her class early before doing anything, but he swore it was just a coincidence.
She gave him a look that dared him to claim that the stars were singing at that moment and thankfully the Doctor didn't feel like challenging her that day. He just held the door open for her before following her in. "And one for luck," he called, dropping the last of the devices in a basket outside, closing the door behind him. Adelaide had already reached the TARDIS where they'd parked it in the back of the storeroom, unlocking it. "Now we're in business. Let's see the lie of the land."
Adelaide held the door open for him. "Let's see what's going on." The Doctor took her hand, kissing it, before pulling her into the TARDIS after him.
A few seconds later, after they'd only managed to get a few steps inside, they heard someone calling from outside. "Hello?" it sounded like one of the students. "Oi! What are you doing? Are you in there? There's been a spillage in Geography. I need some paper towels."
The Doctor, groaning, stepped out of the TARDIS. Adelaide followed him, vaguely recognizing the girl. "Can't you read?" he pointed at a sign he'd put up in some attempt to dissuade humans from entering.
The girl crossed her arms. "Course I can read. Read what?"
"The door." The Doctor crossed his arms too. "It says 'keep out'."
"No, it says 'go away humans'."
The Doctor turned the sign towards himself, frowning at it. "Oh, so it does." Never lose your temper in the middle of a door sign."
"What were you doing in there?" the girl tried to look into the TARDIS, which Adelaide was currently leaning against. "What's that box?"
"The caretaker's box," the Doctor explained. "Every caretaker has their own box."
"It says Police."
The Doctor looked to Adelaide, expecting her to help him, but she just raised her eyebrows. "Exactly. There's a policeman in there, in case of emergencies and children." He grabbed a nearby pack of paper towels, shoving it towards the girl. "Towels, there, go."
"What was that green glow?" the girl asked, clearly not prepared to leave. "There was a green glow coming from in there." She nodded at the TARDIS. "What was it?"
"Of course there was." He grinned. "What's a policeman without a death ray?"
The school bell rang, making Adelaide very thankful she had the next period free. "There's the bell. Don't want to be late."
"Haven't you got shoplifting to go to?"
The girl didn't appear put off. "I'm going to tell the Headmaster."
"Oh, yes, fine," the Doctor waved. "Well, cut along, you're running out of time."
She frowned. "For what?"
He shrugged. "Everything. Human beings have incredibly short lifespans." Adelaide shook her head. "Frankly, you should all be in a permanent state of panic. Tick tock, tick tock."
The girl shook her head. "You're weird."
"Yes, I am. But she's nice." He pointed at Adelaide. "What about you?"
"I'm a disruptive influence."
The Doctor grinned. "Good to meet you."
"And you."
The two shook hands. "Now get lost."
The girl waved goodbye to Adelaide as she moved back. "Okay." She'd just reached the door when Clara entered. "Hello, miss. Love to the Squaddie."
"Sorry, what did you say?" but the girl had already run off. "What was she doing in here?"
"Paper towels," Adelaide called.
"Now, I imagine you have many questions. Fire away. I won't answer any of them, and neither will Adelaide."
"What were they like?"
The two Time Lords frowned at each other. "What were who like?"
"The others before me. Did they let you get away with this kind of thing?" The Doctor looked away and Adelaide didn't say anything. "This school is in danger."
"Well, it's lucky we're here, then."
"From you." As they spoke, the whole group moved into the TARDIS, the Time Lords moving to stand around the console.
He frowned. "Us?"
Clara nodded. "You wouldn't be here if there wasn't an alien threat nearby. Your strategy for dealing with it involves endangering this school."
"You don't know that."
"I don't know anything because you haven't told me anything, which means I wouldn't approve, which means you are endangering this school."
The Doctor blinked. "You've been spending too much time around Adelaide."
"Are you suggesting that's a bad thing, Doctor?" Adelaide frowned, bringing up a hologram for Clara to see.
"What's that?" Clara frowned at it.
"It's a scanner. We're scanning." The Doctor shook his head. "Why do we keep you around?"
"Because Adelaide needs help dealing with you and you both need a conscience." Clara nodded at the hologram. "Scanning for what?"
"Any alien technology in this vicinity should show up." The Doctor leaned against the console. "I used to have a teacher exactly like you once."
"You still do." Clara pointed at him. "Pay attention."
Adelaide frowned. "I think I remember that professor..."
Clara paused. "Wait, did you two go to school together?"
"Overlapping times. The Doctor was a bit older."
"Did you know each other? Before traveling together?" Clara had been told the rough version of how the Time Lords had met.
Adelaide shrugged. "Met once when his child was in my class, but we believe that's it. It's all we can remember, at least." She flicked something on the console, bringing up the image of the robotic they were tracking.
Clara jumped, gasping. "What the hell is it?"
"A Skovox Blitzer. One of the deadliest killing machines ever created. Probably homed in here because of artron emissions." The Doctor came to stand beside Adelaide, looking at the screen she was working at. "You've had enough of them in this area over the years. There's enough explosive in its armory to take out the whole planet."
"Then leave it alone."
"Sooner or later it will creep from its hidey-hole and some military idiot will try to attack it." The Doctor reached over, cutting off the projection. "The world is full of PE teachers."
Clara sighed. "So, your insanely dangerous plan is?" The Doctor held up what appeared to be a watch. "A new watch. Tiny bit disappointed."
"This is a very special watch." He put it on, hitting a button and vanishing.
Clara stepped back. "Doctor? Oi! Ow!" She covered her nose. "Did you just flick my nose?" She frowned. "You're invisible."
"Very good, Clara." Adelaide nodded.
"Oh my God, that's incredible," Clara laughed.
"Correct. I am invisible and I am incredible."
Adelaide jumped when he touched her hand, kissing it despite being invisible. "It's just a matter of reversing light waves," she explained. The Doctor flickered into view again, giving her hand another kiss before turning to face Clara. "We'll be able to give the Blitzer a trace of alien tech and then lead it back here."
"But we don't want it to scan me, hence invisible."
"So you're...you're leading the thing here? To a school? My...my school?"
The Doctor raised his eyebrows. "My school? Oh, that is telling."
"This is the only suitably empty place in the area," Adelaide explained. "The Doctor has set up a circle of Chronodyne generators – time mines – around the school."
He shrugged. "Bit unstable." He tossed one of the devices to Clara. "We switch them on, the Blitzer gets sucked into a big old time vortex, billions of years into the future. It's dead easy. Tiny bit boring. Adelaide'll bring a book and I'll bring a sandwich."
"And me. You're not doing this alone." Clara threw the device back.
"We don't need you this time." The Doctor shook his head. "We'll see you tomorrow. We'll all go somewhere nice. Ancient Egypt. Crocodilopolis. They worship a big crocodile there, so the name is a useful coincidence."
"It's not a coincidence, Doctor..."
He waved Clara away. "Go and canoodle with your boyfriend." Clara's eyes widened. "Come on. We weren't born yesterday. Far from it."
"You did recognize him."
He shrugged. "Possibly reminded me of a certain dashing young time traveler." The Doctor winked at Adelaide, who could only shake her head.
"Oh, of course you recognized him." Clara sighed. "I...sorry. Stupid. I...I underestimated you." She knew that Adelaide had realized who he was, but she'd assumed the Doctor honestly hadn't known.
"It's easily done. There's a lot to estimate." The Doctor grinned at Adelaide.
"And you...you like him?"
The Doctor squeezed Adelaide's hand. "Yes, I like him very, very much. Go home and canoodle." He waved her off. "Doctor's orders. Come on."
Clara shook her head. "Just this once, I'm doing what I'm told." She paused at the door. "What do you two do when you're alone? Canoodle?"
"Clara, that is a very personal question." Adelaide shook her head, but the Doctor wiggled his impressive eyebrows.
The human winced. "Oh God, I really shouldn't have asked." She hurried out of the TARDIS.
The Doctor turned, using Adelaide's held hand to turn her so that she was leaning back against the console. "You know, I don't really feel like canoodling," he mumbled, bringing her hands up to kiss again. He'd developed a love for doing that, randomly kissing her hands whenever she would let him. He especially liked to kiss each individual freckle.
"I do have a class soon."
"A quick cuddle?"
Adelaide leaned forward, letting them put their foreheads together. "When was the last time we cuddled?"
"Then we should do it more often."
"And is now the best time? When I have to go teach a class full of teenagers soon?"
"Pretty please?"
Adelaide sighed. "Are you using manners to convince me?"
He grinned.
A/N: The Time Lords have really reached a peak in their relationship :)
Notes on reviews:
Nightingrave: I'm so glad to hear that you love it! :)
