Chapter 11
I knew I had to tell President Snow about this. Now that I finally understood what he was talking about, I felt like I had to.
"Come in Miss Everdeen." He said when I reached his room where he spends most of his time in. The one with the armchair. I sat down across from him as he was sipping slowly from another cup of tea. That guy really seems to enjoy his tea.
"I know about Peeta. I know what he's done." I said unable to stop myself from spilling it out. I could have swore that I saw just a glint of something in President Snow's eyes but then it was over quickly.
"Oh you poor, poor girl." He said sympathetically. He put his cup of tea down onto the saucer which was on the rather fancy table beside him and took my hand. "It's very unpleasant having to find out like that. I wouldn't wish it on anybody."
"Why would he do that?" I asked him. I began to feel angry at being used by Peeta like I was. I crawled back to him and then he would abuse me all over again. Well the girl in my memory was.
"I don't know dear, I honestly don't know." Sighed President Snow and he squeezed my hand gently as if to comfort me. "Sometimes fear does strange things to people. It makes them want to take over and have power and they don't care who gets in the way. He was probably scared of you. Scared because you had more power than him and had more of an impact on people than he did. He didn't care about you, i'm sorry to say this but he didn't. He didn't care about his people either and he certainly didn't care about who he was hurting along the way on his dangerous path of destruction."
I nodded as I was listening very carefully to what he was saying. My memories seemed to show this. He was jealous of me and so he wanted to kill me. It made sense.
"Miss Everdeen, I want to show you something." President Snow said quietly. "But you will have to concentrate very hard, do you understand?"
"What do you mean?" I asked him.
"What I mean is i'm going to ask you to try and uncover another memory. So you can really see what Peeta is like, what he has done to not just you but to a whole district filled with innocent people. You are going to close your eyes and reach the very depths of your mind." He explained, he leaned over in his armchair so he was only a few inches away from me.
"I will try. I think I can try that." I whispered. If I wanted to find out more, I had to do this.
So I closed my eyes and tried my best to go into my mind, to the deepest part. The part where only the most painful memories are stored. Sometimes when i'm trying to sleep at night nowadays, I can feel this other girl in my brain. This other girl is trying to break free from inside of me. Trying to get out. Sometimes if i'm very quiet, I can hear her screaming. Screaming for help. I don't know who she is but it scares me.
This memory starts off with me in standing in the middle of what looks like the training centre. I look above me and I see various Capitol officials including some of the people who work with the games. The head Gamemaker isn't there though for some reason. I thought he would be. I suddenly notice a flash of blonde hair and I know who it is before I hear him. Peeta.
"Look i need you to do this." Peeta said urgently. He was loud enough for me to hear but no one else down here could as I was the only one in the training centre. "I need you to do this so nobody will know it was me."
"Why are you doing this?" One of the Capitol people asked him. "Don't you have better things to do than threaten a government to completely blow up another District?"
I froze and I felt my whole body starting to shake as I stood there. What on earth was he planning to do?
"EVERYONE NEEDS TO DIE! THEY ALL DESERVE TO DIE! I HATE THEM ALL!" Peeta suddenly yelled and he picked up a knife which was in his pocket and the Capitol person took a step back. Peeta took a step forward again so the sharp pointy part was only inches way from their throat.
I gasped as I felt the person struggling. Struggling to get away from him.
Peeta smiled at their discomfort and leaned even closer to the person. The knife touching the skin on their neck. "You wouldn't want anything to happen to you do you? Especially when you all play such important parts in the making of the games."
"F-fine." The person stuttered. Peeta moved his knife away from their neck and they relaxed.
"Okay fine. We will do it."
Peeta smiled again and this time it was in the nice, kind way. "Good. That's good. I want everyone in District Twelve to feel the pain I did when I was a child. The suffering and the agony. I especially want a certain boy named Gale Hawthorne to die."
Words couldn't describe the shock i felt when I slowly went back into reality. President Snow was sitting on his armchair sipping tea again. He was being observant. Watching me.
"how was that?" He asked me gently. "What did you see?"
"I saw..." How was I meant to describe that? How was I meant to describe how horrible and awful that was? "I saw Peeta. And he was-"
"Threatening the lifes of the Capitol people so they could destroy District Twelve and everyone in it?" He finished. He knew.
"Yes." I replied quietly. There was silence before I spoke again. This time my words came out a little shaky as I spoke. "H-he's a monster."
"I know." President Snow said. That's all he felt he should say. I agreed with his choice.
When I went back to my small but cozy room with the little bed thinking about that last memory and how it has affected me, I noticed that I had a visitor.
She was bald and had some bruises but I recognised her by her eyes as one of the allies in a memory.
"You're Johanna." I breathed. She nodded.
"Yep that's me." She replied as if it was obvious. Which it probably was.
"What are you doing here?" I asked her. Apparently her room was a cell and she must have done something pretty bad to end up in one of those.
"I've came to bring you to your senses." She said.
I looked at her. Bring me to my senses? What was she talking about?
"What do you mean?" I asked her being very confused indeed.
"I mean about Peeta." She explained. She sat down on my bed and looked up at me. "He's not what you currently think."
"He's not what I think?" I found myself laughing. "What am I supposed to think? That he's a nice guy?"
"He is a nice guy." Said Johanna. "Katniss. That's the point. He is a nice guy. He is a lovely guy. He loves you."
"What a load of bullshit." I laughed again. What the hell was she talking about? "He tried to kill me when I was twelve by poisoning a loaf of bread. He pushed me into a wall and threatened me. He and some fellow careers were on the way to kill me again in the 74th Hunger Games. He pushed me into a pack of monkey mutts during the 75th Hunger Games and left me with them to tear my body apart so I would die. Do you not remember that part huh? Surely you remember that part. You were there!"
"Katniss. Katniss listen to me." Johanna stopped me as I began to rant. "Whatever they have told you, whatever you have seen: It is all a lie."
"It's a lie?" I laughed even harder than before. This girl was certainly crazy. No wonder that had locked her up in a cell. "How the fuck do you explain the fact he tried to stab me in the back after pretending to be nice to me? How could that be a lie? I remember it! Oh and here's the best one: how do you explain that he destroyed an entire district because he wanted everyone to die and suffer like he apparently did? And he put a freaking knife up to one of the Capitol people so they would do this? So they would do what he wanted? HOW ARE THEY LIES?"
"THEY ARE ALL LIES!" Johanna was shouting too. She had tears in her eyes. "THEY ARE MANIPULATING YOU KATNISS! WHY CAN YOU SEE IT? THAT BOY WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR YOU! HE LOVES YOU FROM THE VERY DEPTHS OF HIS HEART! HE WOULD PROTECT YOU IN EVERY WAY HE CAN! HE COULD NEVER KILL YOU! HE COULD NEVER DELIBERATELY KILL ANYBODY ELSE EITHER! HE WOULD NEVER DO ANYTHING LIKE THAT EVER! ESPECIALLY NOT TO YOU!"
"You really are crazy, aren't you?" I said coldly.
Johanna grabbed me so hard that I felt like my arm was going to fall off. "Where is she? The real Katniss Everdeen? Where has she gone?"
"I don't know." I shrugged.
"I need her back. I need her back." Johanna fell to the ground and started sobbing.
"Peeta is the enemy. I need to destroy him." I simply said to her and then I left.
